1 - 20 of 2860 Works in Alternate Universe - No Sburb/Sgrub Sessions

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  1. Tags
    Summary

    In a world where a misstep can get you killed, one has to be conscientious of every move they make.

    Alternia is a planet where barbarity never sleeps and those with morals don't last long. For a faint-of-heart human like yourself, survival seems near impossible. Every location brings with it new dangers, towering castles that house malicious masters, whispering meadows where the blood of martyrs paint the grass, and even a world beyond your own where you speak to gods you didn't know existed.

    Your fate is an unpredictable path, and it's only a matter of time until this planet, and its inhabitants, make or break you.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    125,722
    Chapters:
    54/54
    Comments:
    764
    Kudos:
    1811
    Bookmarks:
    125
    Hits:
    27088
  2. Tags
    Summary

    A President and a comedian-turned-Rebellion-leader walk into a bar. Well, not a bar, but it's the President's office. And the President is the only one doing any walking in. It's unclear what the Rebellion leader is actually doing there or how he got in, but if this is a specific joke, there better be one hell of a punchline.

    Entry for the DirkJohn Big Bang 2020.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    118,938
    Chapters:
    15/26
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    99
    Kudos:
    83
    Bookmarks:
    14
    Hits:
    2333
  3. Tags
    Summary

    There's gonna be so much romance drama in this fic. This is a high school au fic. Now onto the actual summary:

    Following the super-duper unfortunate and totally accidental death of his Bro/DAD???? Dave and his brothers, Dirk and Hal, go to live with his mother and two sisters. On top of that, he's also starting his first year of high school at a school with a boy who he's pretty sure hates him.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,654
    Chapters:
    1/?
    Comments:
    8
    Kudos:
    12
    Hits:
    45
  4. Tags
    Summary

    Karkat's comfortable suburban home was nothing particularly interesting - it was, perhaps in all ways necessary, the definition of "tepid" when applied to an architectural construct. It had a number of walls, with which warm air was contained in the winter on days like today, and it had a roof, which usually prevented water from leaking in, and it had computers, three total, with which the house's inhabitants completed tasks and performed the routines of their daily lives. A cantankerous father who frequently got angry at sportsball and his fantasy teams, the fairly obnoxious college student who thankfully remained shut away in his bedroom for the duration of the visit, and Karkat, who was Karkat.

    59/365

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    725
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    3
    Hits:
    21
  5. Tags
    Summary

    Some days, there were days in which you had a desire for certain kinds of foods and feelings - the sensation, for example, of a July barbecue. Unfortunately, Dave lived in a small apartment in a high-rise in Texas, did not go outside enough to know any of his neighbors that may have had a grill, and also, it was in the middle of winter break, and not the summer, when July barbecues were known by most to happen.

    Still, you could fake it admirably with some time, effort, and a gas stove.

    58/365

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    757
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    5
    Hits:
    25
  6. Tags
    Summary

    The basement in Lalonde Manor was cool and dark, courtesy of its proximity to a literal waterfall, but also courtesy of the fact that Rose had turned the air conditioning down low because she liked it frigid at all times. This meant, of course, that the lanky beanpole named Sollux Captor was bundled up in several layers of hoodies. On a typical day, his cold temperatures meant maybe one hoodie with a t-shirt would suffice, but since it was at Lalonde Manor, that meant two plus a winter coat over top, as was necessary for air like this.

    Cold and dry. "Chapstick?" Rose offered, passing a hand backwards towards Sollux.

    57/365

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    615
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    9
    Hits:
    44
  7. Tags
    Summary

    Karkat, a shut in game tester, develops a routine of grabbing coffee at Starboons every morning. Which is funny, because he doesn’t particularly enjoy coffee and he despises the pretentiousness of the barista that works there… Or does he really?

    Meanwhile Eridan struggles to find love.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    12,210
    Chapters:
    3/?
    Comments:
    11
    Kudos:
    14
    Bookmarks:
    3
    Hits:
    73
  8. Tags
    Summary

    After telling his friends about what had happened four years ago on the day of his and Mari's recital, Sunny now has to leave his friends again and move into a new unfamiliar neighborhood full of people he's never met, and unwillingly has to abandon all of his friends that he managed to re-connect with before he had to leave them. Though maybe it's better he won't see them for awhile, especially with what he did to all of them.

    Karkat had to leave his home planet four years ago when he was barely 12 years old, abandoning his home and everything that was familiar with it, and while his new home was much more welcoming than the last one, he'll never get over the trauma and horrible memories he can barely remember.

    A crackfic/crackship I came up with one day. Enjoy Sunkat Hell.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,860
    Chapters:
    1/?
    Comments:
    26
    Kudos:
    9
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    89
  9. Tags
    Summary

    Don't try this one at home, kids.

    56/365

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    685
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    1
    Kudos:
    11
    Hits:
    37
  10. Tags
    Summary

    She knew a couple of facts about this species, she had seen news reports but deliberately hid herself away from pictures when she received her invitation to become a diplomat. To an outsider, they sounded fairly demonic, which is why it presented no surprise that the remaining dregs of Evangelical Christianity that had not adapted to the interstellar age were caught in an uproar about the whole scenario, but to Rose? An endless hall of fascination. Grey skin, fire-colored horns, yellow eyes. The basic body plan of a humanoid (what an incredibly strange coincidence), but any other xenobiological details she kept herself in the dark about.

    Didn't want to spoil the surprise, after all. She had, of course, received a dossier and read precisely none of it. When the elevator doors slid open, that was when she allowed herself the sight for the first time.

    Alternians. What an odd choice of name.

    [Updates every Thursday]

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    8,479
    Chapters:
    4/?
    Comments:
    9
    Kudos:
    38
    Bookmarks:
    6
    Hits:
    595
  11. Tags
    Summary

    He’s John fucking Crocker. Funniest guy in Hollywood. He’s got Netflix specials coming out the wazoo. His comedy tour is sold out across the board.

    Everybody loves him, but nobody knows him.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    89,904
    Chapters:
    17/28
    Comments:
    603
    Kudos:
    518
    Bookmarks:
    67
    Hits:
    8627
  12. Tags
    Summary

    You, a 17 year old had just started a new year of school. You had yet to change your personality to make new friends only to find another being in your same position.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,945
    Chapters:
    4/?
    Comments:
    1
    Kudos:
    3
    Hits:
    70
  13. Tags
    Summary

    John meets his best friend's brother while at a party, in... unconventional circumstances.

    And for some reason, Dirk doesn't kick his ass when he finds out.

    (There's an act of dubious consent in the first chapter only, and mentions of it throughout the rest of the story! I just wanted to make sure to err on the side of caution while tagging.)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    198,571
    Chapters:
    13/?
    Comments:
    23
    Kudos:
    52
    Bookmarks:
    5
    Hits:
    2831
  14. Tags
    Summary

    Bro did not, generally speaking, have a problem with weed getting smoked in his vicinity, or by his little brother. It was whatever. Kid's sixteen, let him smoke some doobies, who gives a shit. The things he did have problems with, however, was when there were two people there, and they were in his apartment, because that meant lots of weed was getting smoked in the place where he liked to sleep. A little? That was fine. A lot? No bueno. Anti-bueno. The opposite of bueno, in fact.

    So, that meant they were smoking on the roof.

    55/365

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    633
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    8
    Hits:
    48
  15. Tags
    Summary

    For their part, they were doing a very good job staying out of trouble in the muddy creek, splashing about in all the water, looking for one thing in particular, a thing that Jade knew for a fact was on this island. She had caught many before, and even had to chastise Becquerel when he kept eating all the venomous ones because she really liked picking them up, with gloves. But we are not here to think Becquerel's doggy thoughts, we are here to watch two girls go frog hunting in a muddy creek on a tropical-ish island, and that is what we will now proceed to do.

    54/365

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    917
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    7
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    23
  16. Tags
    Summary

    "Frankly, I don't see what's so miraculous about it. I've had plenty of whipped creams from a variety of sources before - on occasion, I do like to dabble in the art of confectionery and create my own." Rose said, quietly tapping away at her old 3ds, lying down on Dave's stack of mattresses, occasionally rolling onto her stomach in a way that indicated a deeper desire for relaxation than what the stiff springs could provide to her. "It's just cream and sugar and some vanilla in a stand mixer, and then you let that run until it incorporates a large enough volume of air to develop into whipped cream. Nothing particularly outrageous about that that would require one to pay exorbitant prices for whipped cream in a tub. I fail to see the appeal."

    53/365

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    806
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    8
    Hits:
    36
  17. Tags
    Summary

    Much to your friends' dismay, you check out the weird alien spaceship in your backyard.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    10,223
    Chapters:
    1/?
    Comments:
    8
    Kudos:
    16
    Bookmarks:
    4
    Hits:
    96
  18. Tags
    Summary

    "Becquerel likes to teleport into nuclear silos so he can eat their uranium."

    John did not have the available liquid to do a spit take, so instead they just blew a raspberry of disbelief instead. "He what?" John asked, eyes nearly bulging out of their head.

    52/365

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    735
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    11
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    57
  19. Tags
    Summary

    Absolutely nothing felt better than running on empty.

    51/365

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    726
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    1
    Kudos:
    15
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    44
  20. Tags
    Summary

    "I don't know, it really depends on what sort of catgirl we're talking about, in my eyes." John said, sitting on Rose's bed, quietly bouncing up and down on their butt. Not for any particular reason - they weren't super excited, or jazzed out on one of the many Monster energy drinks scattered around the room (that would be Rose, currently jazzed out on aforementioned drinks). Just sort of... bouncing. "Like, am I just me but I have cat ears, a tail, and going "nya" a lot?"

    50/365

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    682
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    15
    Hits:
    59

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