1 - 20 of 9248 Works in Dirk Strider

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  1. Tags
    Summary

    "Jake English, this mac and cheese is good enough to give a man with erectile dysfunction a rock hard boner.”

    --

    After many years on Earth C, Dirk and Jake learn to heal in their own horny ways.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    8,466
    Chapters:
    2/?
    Kudos:
    5
    Hits:
    50
  2. Tags
    Summary

    "So yeah, that’s it. You have it so, so bad for this guy. Like glancing-in-his-direction-and-doodling-hearts-in-your-notebook kind of bad. (Though not really, because fellas is it gay to draw hearts while yearning? Of course it is.) But he thinks you’re a straight/in denial asshole and he doesn’t know that you’re already completely fucking hard and all your friends are out there listening to what is unequivocally gonna be the worst seven minutes of your life."

    (written for a kink meme prompt involving davekat doing 7 minutes in heaven, pantscum, embarrassment, and both of them pining after each other. how could i possibly resist that?)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    10,300
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Kudos:
    26
    Bookmarks:
    5
    Hits:
    141
  3. Tags
    Summary

    Meat or Candy? Those two choices simply weren't good enough; it's time for something new. Something healthier.
    CANDY - sweet, but empty and unfulfilling. nice in the moment, but ultimately unhealthy
    MEAT - raw, juicy, fulfilling, but leaves a bad feeling in your stomach and a shitty taste in your mouth. might make you sick later.
    SALAD - fulfilling and tasty, and actually fucking healthy to consume! it's something you brought, something you wanted; it's your own path.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,730
    Chapters:
    6/?
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    21
    Kudos:
    34
    Bookmarks:
    5
    Hits:
    326
  4. Tags
    Summary

    Dave and Karkat are sent on their first quest, the new adventure allowing them to get to know each other as never before. Through their journey and with their new deepening relationships; can they save the kingdom as their destiny requires?

    (I'm horrible at summaries sorry. Rated M for later Violence)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,925
    Chapters:
    2/?
    Kudos:
    9
    Hits:
    55
  5. Tags
    Summary

    John sets off to fight a dragon for the princess' hand in marriage. He gets more than what he bargained for.

    WIP

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    913
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    4
    Hits:
    27
  6. Tags
    Summary

    Five gods rent a flat in Manhattan. That sounded like the start of a bad joke.

    In which Loki Silvertongue is not the only lost god who falls to a world that isn’t his own.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    431,368
    Chapters:
    72/?
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    2207
    Kudos:
    2613
    Bookmarks:
    499
    Hits:
    65627
  7. Tags
    Summary

    John Egbert wakes up in a strange school, his last memory was walking into Sburb Academy. As he meets the other people trapped with them, he learns the dark secret of this school. What will he do to survive the game's he is being put through?
    In a mirror situation, Roxy Lalonde wakes up in a similar situation. She's also participating in these games, but what the neither of them know? Is that they're cousin is in the same game, and they're fates are tied.
    You have the feeling it's going to be a long year.
    (REWRITE OF THE ORIGINAL WHICH SUCKED ASS)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,535
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    2
    Hits:
    17
  8. Tags
    Summary

    5 times Dave receives (very different) kisses

    +1 time he does the kissing

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,298
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    4
    Kudos:
    21
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    102
  9. Tags
    Summary

    Dave Strider has always lived his life fighting in the war that took America by storm years ago when the initial nuclear bombs dropped, destroying the country. In a near-death experience, he meets a new and much more sheltered species. He finds himself living a life he never imagined existed in the world that he lived in now, but there he was, growing soft for a boy who had no idea of the troubles and navigation of the overworld.

    (Warnings may change over time, so please check the tags. They include things such as domestic abuse, child abuse, claustrophobia, mentions of blood and gore, and there will probably be mentions triggering emetophobia.)
    Thank you for reading! Y'all are the best!

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    57,316
    Chapters:
    21/?
    Comments:
    33
    Kudos:
    56
    Bookmarks:
    7
    Hits:
    1084
  10. Tags
    Summary

    Shit goes down

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2
    Chapters:
    12/12
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    6
    Hits:
    37
  11. Tags
    Summary

    *stumbles in stoned, late, and uninvited*

    NOT MOBILE FRIENDLY! hover your mouse over the anime shades for the meat of the story! thanks so much to the folks doing the DirkJohn 2020 Big Bang for their incredible work on this ship. concrit and comments are very much welcome!

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,473
    Chapters:
    2/?
    Kudos:
    18
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    436
  12. Tags
    Summary

    🍬 "I've got a sweet tooth- it gets the best of me, and you're like candy~" 🍭

    https://youtu.be/WpVSbppnpps

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,754
    Chapters:
    2/?
    Kudos:
    1
    Hits:
    27
  13. Tags
    Summary

    Dirk Strider has to kill Jake English.

    He's not the only one. Won't be the last. He has no choice if he wants to keep his brother alive, and for that, he would do anything the world asked of him.

    Jake English has to keep them alive.

    He never asked to be a leader, just wanted to make sure his friends had enough to stay on their feet.

    It's too late to turn back now.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    12,286
    Chapters:
    5/?
    Comments:
    16
    Kudos:
    14
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    138
  14. Tags
    Summary

    It all started like everything does in Homestuck on April 13, 2009 but the way it changed was that it never stopped.

    Or: A story based off the Infinite Loops project with all the chaos and shenanigans that follow

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    10,702
    Chapters:
    4/?
    Comments:
    14
    Kudos:
    25
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    163
  15. Tags
    Summary

    For TT life has been simple. There's only one thing that matters to him, and it's his brother TG. Their new master, Harley, lives alone on a secluded island with two other boys already under his control. There is nowhere to go, even if they could escape. TT can't save them from their new owner, but maybe there's a way to keep a piece of yourself alive, if you hide it in somebody else's heart.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,711
    Chapters:
    4/?
    Kudos:
    10
    Hits:
    176
  16. Tags
    Summary

    It’s been three years since SBURB, and John’s friends have acclimated to the new environment they have found themselves in. They’re able to live happily, even if true normalcy isn’t a possibility. John, however, hasn’t quite been able to adapt quite like his friends. Even if the other’s stories are far from over, John has been left much farther behind by the narrative. But now? Now it’s time to catch him up.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    14,341
    Chapters:
    2/?
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    14
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    225
  17. Tags
    Summary

    DIRK: I’m gonna need you to walk me through the steps. Think of it as wooing me, here.
    DIRK: What’s in it for you?
    DIRK: Why do you want this?
    JAKE: Well when you shove me hard on the spot like that a fella starts feeling a little bit silly.
    JAKE: How shall i put this...
    JAKE: Have you ever seen the movie Avatar, dearest?
    JAKE: It stars these huge and really elegant androgynous alien catpersons of various blue hues frolicking about in the jungle and experiencing primal intimacy through the act of downright spiritual brainfucking.

    Jake wants to have an "honest conversation" with Dirk about some of his wants and buried anxieties.
    Apparently, the upper echelons of English's hierarchy of needs are pretty curious about the whole... narrativic ordeal.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,938
    Chapters:
    2/3
    Comments:
    6
    Kudos:
    26
    Bookmarks:
    5
    Hits:
    161
  18. Tags
    Summary

    One night, Dirk Strider finds his bath full of water, with a strange kid floating in it. When he pulls the kid out, he finds that he can’t talk, but sings in a way that gives everyone the creeps. But you can’t call the cops and say that a stranger appeared in your bathtub. That’s crazy, right?

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    46,054
    Chapters:
    27/?
    Comments:
    198
    Kudos:
    204
    Bookmarks:
    21
    Hits:
    3130
  19. Tags
    Summary

    In which Dave falls into a pit of despair, you guys dig a hole in a graveyard together, he kisses you (and most likely regrets it) and the world seems to spin again-- even though Dave killed his brother.
    Jokes on you.
    Sobbing ensues, along with drunken stupors, sexual innuendos, stupid rambling, and a sprinkle of unresolved sexual tension. Oh, and some drugs, fucking, and murder.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    14,417
    Chapters:
    12/?
    Comments:
    111
    Kudos:
    252
    Bookmarks:
    32
    Hits:
    3460
  20. Tags
    Summary

    “The full moon is tomorrow,” you tell him. His eyes widen slightly, and then watch you with a new kind of intensity. “A strong moon, so I gather. That is when I will kill you.”

    (Dirk finds a werewolf dying in the snow, and like the arrogant Hunter he is, he takes him back to his hideout and nurses him back to health, intent on killing him as the next full moon rises. But this moon is different. It's not a moon for hunting, as Dirk soon finds out.

    written for a beautiful kink meme prompt which got completely out of my hands.)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    9,927
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    1
    Kudos:
    24
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    337

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