1 - 20 of 153 Works in Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia is Bad at Communicating

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  1. Tags
    Summary

    Geralt and Jaskier encounter an unfamiliar creature who decides to help Geralt learn an important lesson. Why this results in Jaskier getting shrunk until he is only six inches tall, no one seems to have any idea. Can Geralt, along with his brothers-in-arms, Child Surprise, and two powerful sorceress friends fix it? Gods only know, but it'll be funny and tragic along the way to finding out.

    Note: Title is a reference to the quote: "Come live in my heart, and pay no rent." - Samuel Lover

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    23,016
    Chapters:
    15/?
    Comments:
    80
    Kudos:
    319
    Bookmarks:
    47
    Hits:
    5305
  2. Tags
    Summary

    It has been only seven days since Posada and Geralt's paper-thin patience can't handle this chattering bardling following him everywhere.
    The witcher tries everything to scare him off and each time Geralt pushes Jaskier away the songbird comes back with more determination.

    Geralt stops trying after a while and accepts his fate as Jaskier's muse. This burden slowly seems to become a need and Geralt is not ready to handle his own feelings when he was denying them throughout his whole life.

    OR: How these two muppets trying hard not to fall in love.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    109,562
    Chapters:
    16/?
    Comments:
    240
    Kudos:
    557
    Bookmarks:
    147
    Hits:
    15184
  3. Tags
    Summary

    Jaskier told himself it was the suffering that made his music better and he would say as much to anyone he met.

    The miles he had trekked to this new place were a reminder of the long road to success, the lack of interest from the crowd showed their inability to appreciate talent when they heard it and frankly the mugging at the end of the night would be a good song one day.

    At least, that’s what Jaskier told himself as he was punched in the face for the second time.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    10,951
    Chapters:
    6/?
    Comments:
    8
    Kudos:
    48
    Bookmarks:
    5
    Hits:
    623
  4. Tags
    Summary

    Buffy Summers is a sixteen year old mutant/slayer, born into a fated lineage of girls who slay vampires and demons. Labelled a freak of nature and the only one of her kind, until she meets the infamous Geralt of Rivia, a Witcher. Causing her to feel less alone in the world, finding someone who truly understands her

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    24,706
    Chapters:
    2/?
    Comments:
    6
    Kudos:
    6
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    272
  5. Tags
    Summary

    There are three little words people usually say when declaring their feelings. They have never made sense to Geralt. So instead, he has his own three words to tell people how much they mean to him. They are not always the same, but they always mean so much to him.

    It's too bad that there's little chance of Jaskier understanding Geralt's own three little words.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,290
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    20
    Kudos:
    229
    Bookmarks:
    12
    Hits:
    1158
  6. Tags
    Summary

    Jaskier offers kisses for luck, immediately backpedals, and leaves Geralt in the path of misfortune.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,041
    Chapters:
    1/2
    Comments:
    9
    Kudos:
    34
    Bookmarks:
    3
    Hits:
    214
  7. Tags
    Summary

    Geralt comes back from the public bath looking upset. His face is molded into a deep scowl, his shoulders tense and and footsteps heavier than necessary. His hair is even completely loose against his shoulders and neck, like he couldn’t be bothered to tie it up.

    It’s not entirely unusual for Geralt to be upset like this, but baths normally calm him down. Jaskier assumes that he had to, Melitele forbid, talk to someone. Geralt always hates when that happens. Perhaps he even had to carry out a conversation for some reason. Forced to at swordpoint or something.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,175
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    20
    Kudos:
    245
    Bookmarks:
    12
    Hits:
    1303
  8. Tags
    Summary

    "Youre lucky I can't draw my sword, Bard."

    "You're lucky I'm not easily offended, or..." Jaskier's face scrunched up in concentration, but no threat he could accomplish seemed enough against the gigantic semi-human. "I'd kill you with my very intimidating big muscles."

    "Ah, yes. Don't worry, I think this injury will do all the work for you" The Witcher laughed weakly, but it seemed like it was the wrong thing to say, because when he looked at his companion he could only see the panic rising up again.

    "Oh, fuck."

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,949
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    31
    Bookmarks:
    3
    Hits:
    657
  9. Tags
    Summary

    Summer in Toussaint and a Dornish diplomatic party. What could possibly go wrong?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    13,197
    Chapters:
    4/?
    Comments:
    110
    Kudos:
    117
    Bookmarks:
    24
    Hits:
    1270
  10. Tags
    Summary

    For centuries, the village at the foot of the Rivia mountains has sacrificed a young virgin every five years to the demon that lives up there. These young girls are given to keep the peace and make certain that the demon won't come down to slaughter the livestock and the villagers. However, this year there is no pretty girl of the right age and beauty who is a virgin too. So the fates choose and befall Jaskier to be the sacrifice and satisfy the demon's hunger.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    120,918
    Chapters:
    39/45
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    834
    Kudos:
    2509
    Bookmarks:
    447
    Hits:
    63781
  11. Tags
    Summary

    On their way to a Halloween party, Geralt and Jaskier get lost in the woods and end up stumbling into somebody who knows an entirely different version of them.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,975
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    6
    Kudos:
    67
    Bookmarks:
    4
    Hits:
    454
  12. Tags
    Summary

    "As soon as he had run into Geralt at the bar, Jaskier had been both mindlessly infatuated and completely unsure what to expect. Geralt's enthusiasm for learning to give head was definitely one of the things he didn't see coming."

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    10,179
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    74
    Kudos:
    281
    Bookmarks:
    23
    Hits:
    1769
  13. Tags
    Summary

    Jaskier wishes Yennefer and Geralt would stop being so weird and just fuck already.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,683
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    8
    Kudos:
    82
    Bookmarks:
    3
    Hits:
    547
  14. Tags
    Summary

    Geralt needs to get Ciri to Cintra, but going by land is too dangerous. While at sea, Geralt reunites with a face who he thought would be happy to see him, it was not.

    This was done because I just love how angry Joey Batey can sing sometimes, it's so beautiful. Also Pirates are just cool

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    10,932
    Chapters:
    2/?
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    74
    Bookmarks:
    15
    Hits:
    1056
  15. Tags
    Summary

    Geralt was tired of being immortal and watching the world change around him while he was trying to find his place in it. He was the last witcher to grace this earth, and as honouring as it was, it didn't fill up the hollowness inside him.

    He still spent his days hunting for monsters while he worked for an organisation that kept every magical being and supernatural creature as a secret from the public eye while he tried hard to avoid his memories about a certain teasing smile and cornflower-blue eyes.

    Hundreds of years after he last saw his bard, Geralt got a new case where the only eyewitness was a young brunet, with bright eyes, clever mouth, and he called himself Jaskier.

    Geralt didn't know if he land in his personal hell, or it was just a dream come true, but he knew one thing. He was not ready to face Jaskier again and deal with his emotions at the same time.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    120,492
    Chapters:
    17/?
    Comments:
    321
    Kudos:
    328
    Bookmarks:
    74
    Hits:
    8036
  16. Tags
    Summary

    Jaskier gets hurt during a hunt and Geralt has to carry him back to town. Jaskier has mixed feelings about this.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,460
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    12
    Kudos:
    327
    Bookmarks:
    21
    Hits:
    1672
  17. Tags
    Summary

    Geralt is not good with people, which makes contributing to his family's horde of knowledge extremely difficult. Still, he has to try. A fateful meeting with a sorceress in Posada leads to a potential solution to his woes.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,061
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    14
    Kudos:
    37
    Bookmarks:
    5
    Hits:
    119
  18. Tags
    Summary

    He wondered why he never once told Geralt to stop.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,903
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    34
    Kudos:
    312
    Bookmarks:
    41
    Hits:
    2952
  19. Tags
    Summary

    Part of Geralt’s core rails at the very thought of needing anyone, because that’s not how things are supposed to be, but it makes the matter no less true.

    He needs Jaskier. Not for his music or his social skills or, gods forbid, any sort of fighting aptitude. No, he needs him because Jaskier just...is. And it seems that Geralt can no more stop himself from needing Jaskier than he can stop the sun from rising. (He knows. He’s tried to quash the feeling time and again. He always fails.)

    Which brings him back to the present moment. Watching Jaskier play and...and wanting.

    The question is, should he let Jaskier know?

    And Geralt wonders. And thinks. About whys and hows and maybes.

    Maybe.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,979
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    57
    Kudos:
    485
    Bookmarks:
    67
    Hits:
    2325
  20. Tags
    Summary

    Podfic of The Path Doesn't Have Beds and Bathtubs, Jaskier by neverafuckgiven

    Author's summary:
    Jaskier, however, is a pampered child that likes to inflict those same ideals on whoever’s closest, which is always Geralt. He scowls and finishes his ale. “One room is fine.” He’s learned to pick his battles and right now his shoulder is still stinging from the injury he got earlier. One battle today was more than enough.
    *
    Geralt is too emotionally stunted to realize that Jaskier trying to pamper him is Jaskier telling him he loves him. Instead, he ends up worrying that Jaskier is going to end up missing all the fancy things like regular baths and beds and end up leaving him. Not that Geralt loves him or anything.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    0
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    26
    Hits:
    410

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