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  1. Tags
    Summary

    You met Jay a decade ago and you've never stopped thinking about him. You're content to just watch his videos and daydream, but a phone call on Jay's birthday changes everything.

    Celebrate Jay's 40th by reading the longest Red Letter Media reader-insert fanfic ever written!

    Full of fun fanfic tropes, movie references, and adorable awkwardness; this is a full-length heartfelt romantic comedy staring you and Jay Bauman!

    This work will be posted in REAL TIME! It begins on September 10th, 2020 and ends September 25th, 2020. If something in the fic happens on Monday, September 21st, well then it will be posted Monday, September 21st! Some days will have up to EIGHT chapters posted, but every day will have at least one! Subscribe to the work to keep updated.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    73,566
    Chapters:
    31/38
    Comments:
    97
    Kudos:
    48
    Bookmarks:
    5
    Hits:
    780
  2. Tags
    Summary

    Now a successful but lonely laser scientist, Dex only wants one thing for his 40th birthday, but getting it would involve time travel.

    So it's a good thing he invented a time travel machine for just such an occasion.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    11,211
    Chapters:
    2/3
    Comments:
    20
    Kudos:
    44
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    272
  3. Tags
    Summary

    You met a guy at a bar. He took you home and you had the hottest hook up you've ever had in your life, but you left before getting his number (or his name). You're sure you'll never see him again, content to let him become a memory, but things don't exactly work out that way.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,709
    Chapters:
    2/?
    Comments:
    9
    Kudos:
    20
    Bookmarks:
    3
    Hits:
    107
  4. Tags
    Summary

    The apocalypse looks good on him, Mike thinks. Current stern concentration-face aside, Jay has never seemed as relaxed or smiled as freely as he has done since the two of them started their cozy life together at the end of the world.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,425
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    6
    Kudos:
    18
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    100
  5. Tags
    Summary

    A GIF of a young, baby-faced Jay leads to some mutual masturbation with your boyfriend, the now no-longer-baby-faced-but-still-fucking-adorable Jay.

    (It's a cheesy, self-indulgent setup I know. I also wrote almost all of this on my phone so sorry for any mistakes!)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,181
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    4
    Kudos:
    17
    Hits:
    309
  6. Tags
    Summary

    Sid decides to go on tour (ie: live out of a shitty van and play in dive bars for a month), but being homesick for a wimpy little nerd is so not Punk Rock™

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,615
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    12
    Kudos:
    21
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    104
  7. Tags
    Summary

    Mike and Jay used to make dirty movies together. They had a falling out and went down separate paths. Mike continued directing, Jay became a webcam star. After years of avoiding each other, an enterprising friend convinces them to get together for one last blockbuster collaboration: directed by Mike, starring Jay, and probably doomed to bring about the end of the world, or at least lots of explosive drama to the wacky world of Milwaukee-based independent adult entertainers.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    100,226
    Chapters:
    8/12
    Comments:
    100
    Kudos:
    70
    Bookmarks:
    4
    Hits:
    1619
  8. Tags
    Summary

    The road was never ending.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,766
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    3
    Kudos:
    12
    Hits:
    167
  9. Tags
    Summary

    Did Jay just invite him on a date? Who knows? Mike certainly doesn't.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,725
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    4
    Kudos:
    25
    Hits:
    218
  10. Tags
    Summary

    It's been two years since Mike and Jay were a crime fighting duo. Now Jay may be up to something, and Mike isn't sure if he's prepared for what that could mean.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    29,510
    Chapters:
    2/16
    Comments:
    10
    Kudos:
    14
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    189
  11. Tags
    Summary

    Chicago, 2011: A VCR repair convention shares its hotel and venue with a comic con. Jay gets caught up in the excitement and has a new experience. Mike gets drunk, then heartsick, then determined.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    18,454
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    16
    Kudos:
    43
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    480
  12. Tags
    Summary

    You cocked your head to the side. After a moment, you stated, bluntly, "I wanna suck your cock while you're driving."

    Mike's eyebrows jumped to the ends of his relaxed hair. "That so?" he asked, his voice having raised a bit.

    Already repositioning so your knees were under you, you responded, "Yep. Actually, revision: I'm going to suck your cock while you're driving."

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,595
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    4
    Kudos:
    14
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    196
  13. Tags
    Summary

    Jay is a member of an anonymous sex club. Mike is a VCR repairman with a big dick. His voice sounds so familiar.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    55,444
    Chapters:
    6/6
    Comments:
    41
    Kudos:
    55
    Bookmarks:
    5
    Hits:
    699
  14. Tags
    Summary

    Really, you shouldn’t be held accountable for your actions. At that point in the night, you were the only waitress on the floor, as well as on the tail-end of an eight-hour shift, and this booth of backwards-hat-wearing, cargo shorts assholes had tempted you to upend a pot of scalding coffee into their laps more than a few times in the past hour-and-a-half they’d been there.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    12,638
    Chapters:
    6/6
    Comments:
    38
    Kudos:
    70
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    788
  15. Tags
    Summary

    It wasn’t getting any easier.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,905
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    5
    Kudos:
    23
    Hits:
    191
  16. Tags
    Summary

    Plinkett's boarded up house only has one bed.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    16,900
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    12
    Kudos:
    50
    Bookmarks:
    6
    Hits:
    757
  17. Tags
    Summary

    When Jay wakes up on an alien spaceship, the last thing he expects to see is a desperately horny Mike. But the aliens have a plan for them...

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    10,038
    Chapters:
    1/2
    Comments:
    10
    Kudos:
    16
    Hits:
    303
  18. Tags
    Summary

    The aliens who granted Rich immortality are angry with him. Unable to kill him, they de-age him in revenge, leaving him with Jay and Mike as makeshift parents, surely the cruelest punishment available.

     

     

    (OR IS IT)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    26,170
    Chapters:
    3/3
    Comments:
    26
    Kudos:
    47
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    429
  19. Tags
    Summary

    Just a series of drabbles and ideas ranging from crack to tear-jerking

    who am I kidding I can’t write shit with any real emotion

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    14,658
    Chapters:
    11/?
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    31
    Kudos:
    18
    Hits:
    261
  20. Tags
    Summary

    Jay is in love, and--spoiler alert--it all works out in the end. But, as per fanfiction standard, he has to have incredibly rough and hot sex with the person of interest first. And that's really what we're here for, isn't it?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,631
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    4
    Kudos:
    24
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    396

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