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  1. Public Bookmark 18

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    A little over six months after the world didn't end, two angels show up at the bookstore claiming they only want to talk – though what they want to talk about quickly sends both Crowley and Aziraphale careening down a path of doubt, exploration, and, ultimately, freedom.

    ~

    Pursing their lips, Zedika nods and then looks up into Aziraphale's face once more. "I have begun; you deserve the rest of the explanation," they murmur, and then take a deep breath. "A very long time ago, an entity invaded this world. A dangerous parasite long known to our kind. It…” They trail off, licking their lips, and finish in a whisper, "It is the one you have known previously as… 'God.'"

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    32,988
    Chapters:
    16/?
    Comments:
    71
    Kudos:
    108
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    18
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    10 Sep 2020

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    “Who would win: Aziraphale or Crowley.”

    “Oh!” Aziraphale startles. “Well—such a question. It’s not as though either of us has engaged in so much as fisticuffs in ages, and one does need to keep up practice with these sorts of things.” His fretting dies abruptly when Crowley cuts over him clearly, baldly: “Aziraphale.”

    Aziraphale’s mouth clicks shut, and he goes so still that the group is forcibly reminded that ethereal beings don’t technically need to breathe, have a heartbeat, or even metabolize energy to exist. Beside him, Crowley’s stiffened up and his lips pull back from his teeth in a toe-curling wince.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    8,739
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    164
    Kudos:
    1371
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    409
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    04 Sep 2020

  3. Public Bookmark 26

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    "You practise on me, and I turn my best seduction routine on you. We'll make a competition of it, all right? Best flirter takes all."

    "But surely you realise you have an unfair advantage," Aziraphale said. He flickered his gaze from Crowley's face to his tight t-shirt, and down along his tight jeans, lingering on his thighs and calves, and back again. It must have taken less than a second to do the once-over, but by the time he reached Crowley's face again, that face was probably smoking. "You must be aware of your natural advantages."

    "Urk. Yeah. Nah. I think you hold all the cards, mate," Crowley managed to say. He wasn't sure how he was going to survive the next week.

    Written for Unconventional Courtship 2020, and based on the summary to Harlequin romance Cracking the Dating Code by Poppy West.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    8,895
    Chapters:
    2/?
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    124
    Kudos:
    120
    Bookmarks:
    26
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    932

    03 Sep 2020

  4. Public Bookmark 41

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    “Have you ever wondered what it feels like?” Crowley asks while contemplating the dregs at the bottom of his wine glass. He’s aiming for philosophical but fears the faint wheeze at the end of the question might have given him away.

    “Have I ever wondered what ‘what’ feels like,” Aziraphale asks finally.

    “Sex,” he says, much louder than intended or reasonable. They both wince. 

    “Oh, have you never…?” Aziraphale asks with polite disbelief.

    “You have?” Crowley demands.


    Look, when you're largely inexperienced sex-favorable asexual ineffables, it takes a bit of practice, a lot of communication, and some bull-headed persistence to get your sex life in commendable working order. Or, five times things got (hilariously) awkward during sex, and one time after they've got it mostly figured out. A companion fic to "Scratching That Itch." (Sex acts, such as they are, tagged per chapter in chapter notes!)

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    14,795
    Chapters:
    6/6
    Comments:
    131
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    284
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    41
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    02 Sep 2020

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    “So, let me get this straight,” Crowley said, dragging that r a little for best effect. “Your librarian asks for an escort, and the first person you think of is me?”

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    310,395
    Chapters:
    34/40
    Collections:
    2
    Comments:
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    Kudos:
    1724
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    18 Aug 2020