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Message Man

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Tyler never shows his face to the camera.

He doesn't like, when people stare at him. Do others' eyes laid on his face make him feel uncomfortable? He thinks about it a lot, but doesn't know an answer. He avoids looking at people in the eye. He doesn't have an issue with showing his silhouette.

He records his videos on his phone. He takes photos on his phone. He hides behind his phone. His phone contains a lot of various things.

He doesn't like telling people about his life, so he doesn't do it. He wants to be interesting, and prefers, when people have to discover a personality. There's nothing interesting about revealing everything related to you at once. You would have no topics to talk about the next time. If he next time ever happens.

Some of his videos consist of a body sitting behind a piano, with fingers moving softly across the keys. Some of his videos consist of an upper body in front of the camera and hands holding steady a small ukulele. Some of his videos have a human singing voice. Some of his videos have a voice, but not singing this time. Voice in some of these videos recites an unknown poetry. Only interesting people are intrigued by it. It's a small voice.

You could say, that Tyler's fanbase is average amount, but for him, it isn't too big in comparison to an effort he puts into his job. Sometimes he gets mad, when he sees videos of stupid, overrated challenges getting the most attention. He concludes, that people are into dumb things.

If the society doesn't like the kind of stuff he shows, he won't even push them to watch. He thinks, that it's better to have people who all appreciate, what you do, than to encourage the random ones to waste their time on watching boring artsy videos. They could watch another dumb one instead. Dumb people won't understand.

He never responds to comments, he never accepts requests, he doesn't subscribe anybody. He watches many Youtube videos daily, but no one for his own entertainment, just to get an inspiration, to rate, to consider, what he could change in his own channel, to cringe at. Except one person's videos, but it's a mystery. He's all mysterious and he's good with it.

He is really thankful for good comments, don't get him wrong, because it means, that at least people behind the screen understand, what he wants to hand on. However, there are also, obviously, people, who tell him he's a freak, or he must have his face burned, or something equally ridiculous, because why wouldn't he like to show his face to the big audience?

He can find comments telling him to show his face, but in a kind way, as well. He appreciates kindness, thank you, but no, even they won't be able to see more than his upper body.

He does everything on purpose. He created himself as a strange, cold guy. Sometimes he even wonders, if people find him rude, because he isn't like those typical happy and energetic youtubers and doesn't even talk with "fans". Who does that? He literally pushes new watchers away. He doesn't care.

He does that on purpose, because he wants to change his shy and weak behaviour, as he isn't able to do it in real life. Sometimes he would really like to respond to some comments. There are many things he wants to tell and many questions he needs to answer, but that is contradictory with his character. What would people think if a semi-popular guy decided to leave a nice comment below some video? That he needs attention, for sure. He doesn't need any, no thanks. He does everything by himself.

In real life, despite his shyness and introvert life style, he likes to be nice. If he doesn't have anything nice to say, he stays silent.

Ashley, his cousin, is also his best friend. They both know and understand each other too well not to stay and stick around. Ashley, on the other hand, is full of energy, she's loud and complains about everything out loud. She can't keep her mouth shut, but she's a good company. Tyler is glad they are cousins and he has always known her, because if they were strangers, they probably wouldn't want to get to know each other. They are two different worlds.

Ashley knows well about his channel and supports everything he does. He feels like he doesn't deserve her. She must watch his every video and leave some comments below. He doesn't respond to her either. She gets annoyed and tells she hates him, but she's the only person, that could offend him and he wouldn't care. She takes advantage of her popular blog on tumblr and posts links to his videos there, too.

Speaking of tumblr. He has an account there too, but even Ashley doesn't know about it, and it's a whole different story. He doesn't want to share it with her, because he saves his blog for particular events in his life, which would force him to post words even Ashley shouldn't know about. Things like that happen. Sometimes. He doesn't know, what would have to happen, but he hopes it won't happen.

He posts pictures of his instruments, of chaos inside his notebook, of his hands, of his hair. He screams at world through his photos and videos, as he can't do this in the real life.

The only reason, why his family knows about his videos is because of Ashley, obviously. Two months ago they invited her to a dinner. She's very comfortable around his parents and siblings, since they all have known each other for years. She was the loudest one at the table that day and willingly participated in family conversation, while Tyler was lurking with his phone under the table, with head based on his hand.

"Hey, Tyler, chill out, you're not on Youtube," she scoffed, "Stop hiding that pretty face of yours."

And everything would be fine, if he didn't look at her with an expression similar to somebody, who just saw a ghost. It's not, that he could just add some sarcastic comment and everybody would take it as a joke and forget about it, no, he had to be so obvious with his emotions and begin panicking.

"Oh, they didn't know?" she continues, like nothing serious happened.

"About what?" asked his mother.

And now, the family respects, what he does, but his parents don't like, that he takes it too seriously. They don't see recording videos as a good, constant job, which will lead him to success. "I'm already successful," he always mutters, but they only sigh at him and end the conversation.

By saying he is successful, he means it. He would never expect, that people would like that type of a person he is. Not that he has got million of fans, or something like that, but he still calls it a success.

He knows, that he can run out of all his ideas for new videos, that people can forget about him and everything can fall apart. He doesn't like to think much about it, so he tries not to, when he's still pretty good at what he does. However, still not good enough and never good enough, and he dreams about being that good and confident like that one person in particular, who made him start all of this.