~In revolutionary school~
It was created on a dare.
Grantaire was drunk, nothing unusual, until Bahorel suggested that he make a YouTube channel.
At the time he laughed it off, but made one anyway because, hey he can always delete it in the morning.
Except he didn’t. Now Grantaire’s channel didn’t take off by any means but it was a fun hobby to keep and he had a steady stream of subscribers and comments to encourage him to keep uploading.
However, as his crush on Enjolras developed Grantaire’s singing became a way to talk about his feelings for the man. (The amount of comments telling him to “just ask him out R!” is obscene)
But, lo and behold, R didn’t listen to his fans and continued to pine about Enjolras on his channel in peace.
~As vicious as Musain rule~
In retrospect Grantaire realized that someone would probably find his channel eventually but not in the way they did.
It all stemmed from a meeting ending early and the Amis having downtime for once.
Courfeyrac was fooling around on youtube, showing Combeferre funny videos he saw when they looked in the recommended section.
“Ferre, is that R?”
They watch a couple videos to guarantee that yes R has a youtube channel where he sings songs.
All the Amis gather around Courf’s shitty laptop and sit in awe, video after video.
“He kept this from us for so long?” Jehan manages to say.
“Grantaire has his reasons…” Bahorel is mercifully oblivious to the confused looks the rest of the group throws his way because he is an awful liar.
~I got my feelings bruised~
Eventually everyone drops any pretense of returning to their work and they make their way from Grantaire’s oldest videos to the newer ones, laughing at the former.
Even so they couldn’t avoid where the songs became less of covers and more of his feelings, out in the open.
Finally Courf clicks on the newest video available, simply titled “?” from earlier in the day.
Throughout the time when R’s songs became about unrequited love, Enjolras felt his heart being crushed because wow that tiny sliver of his mind that hoped R liked him is gone.
As the video starts, the group can see Grantaire looks resigned, almost as if he expects something to go wrong.
“Hey guys! I know lots of you asked me to cover this song, and I am but I made one change that I hope you’ll enjoy.”
The way he sings is just so saddening for everyone to watch, because it speaks of complete and utter heartbreak and resignation.
~By the leader in red~
When Grantaire gets to the second verse, the Amis hear Musain, and immediately know it’s one of us.
Enjolras almost loses it right there because it’s bad enough he knew R didn’t like him but another one of the Amis?
They all watch R sing about Enjolras, and everybody thinks back to the fight that Enjolras and Grantaire had the day before when R ended up storming out of the Musain in a hurricane of despair and heartbreak, Enjolras standing in the middle of the cafe stunned.
Enjolras visibly wilts in his chair because of course the one time Grantaire listens to him is when he hurts him.
After the video ends everyone is silent in their seats, each person piecing together the songs R had sung now knowing they were about Enjolras.
For the man in question only one phrase keeps repeating through his head. “Love of mine”
To everyone’s surprise Combeferre is the one who turns to their chief and whispers, “Enj..”
“I need to find him.” And with that Enjolras whirls out of the Musain, frantically trying to think about what just happened and make his way to Grantaire’s apartment at the same time.
Eventually he finds it, waiting outside R’s door with shaking hands.
The door opens to reveal a very confused looking Grantaire, who is immediately enveloped by Enjolras.
“I’m so sorry R, I never meant to hurt you…” He speaks into Grantaire’s curls.
“Um, Enj what are you talking about.”
“The videos, your channel, the new song and-”
Grantaire cuts off Enj “No, I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable with all the songs I’ll stop I swear.”
“No Grantaire, don’t you understand I’m sorry because I like you too and I made you feel like tha-”
Once again Enjolras is cut off, only this time is considerably happier about it because he was cut off by Grantaire’s lips.