Regina Mills dragged herself out of bed at an ungodly 5:30 AM. She doesn’t have anywhere to be necessarily, she is just used to the daily grind of being Mayor of Storybrooke.
For 28 years, before the curse was broken, she woke up at the same time, every day, did the same thing, every day. Some habits are harder to break than others. She pulled on a pair of sweatpants and changed her night shirt to a comfy tee left over from Robin.
Robin was supposed to have been her soul mate, but he decided that he wanted to try and make it work with his wife. This decision was not a surprise to Regina, she had been expecting something to go wrong in the relationship from the moment she realized he cared for her. She knew it was only a matter of time before the other shoe fell and she would be alone, again.
The fact that she had expected it didn’t make it hurt any less. For the last month, she was in full avoidance mode, spending almost every evening with her son's other mother, and sheriff of Storybrooke, Emma Swan. She refused to go out unless she absolutely had to and Emma, who announced she was Regina’s own personal cheer coach, hadn’t pushed the brunette into doing anything she wasn’t ready to do.
The women had grown quite close in the last year or so, Regina would go as far as to even classify the blonde as her very best friend, something Regina never would have guessed on the night she met her son's biological mother. Emma was a kindred spirit to Regina, they both didn’t know how to love very well, they both had trust issues and they both loved their son, Henry, with a fiery passion that only a mother has. The more time the mayor spent with her son’s other mother, the more she could really see Emma. The woman behind the savior, behind the sheriff. The purity of her, was addictive. Emma never pulled her punches with Regina, whether it be advice or actual punches, the mayor always knew what she got from the sheriff was 100% honesty.
Emma Swan was a complicated subject for Regina. She was the first person in decades that made the mayor feel anything remotely real. Granted that feeling was jealousy, disdain, frustration and anger, but it was honest. Even as they argued, she had always had a flirty attraction to the blonde. The way Emma could pull Regina’s passion out of her, as if she knew exactly how to push her buttons. The mayor never gave much thought to it until Regina had finally been intimate with her true love, Robin.
Such a complicated subject Emma was indeed.
It had been a couple years since her last dalliance, Graham, and Regina had been nervous to be with Robin. She had once had her hopes and dreams of a happy ending pinned to this man, he was her soul mate after all. Because it had been years since Robin had been with anyone but his wife, the first time between he and Regina was, lackluster to say the least. It ended far too quickly, was awkward and they both were more nervous than passionate, but she had high hopes that he would satisfy her, eventually. The fact that he seduced her within her family's mausoleum, well, didn’t exactly help with the sensuality level. She thought the next time, would be romantic and less like a heated race to the finish line, a race it seems that she always lost. The next time had actually been the very next morning, it lasted a little longer and he was more passionate, it was slower and when she closed her eyes to enjoy the feeling of him, Emma Swan entered into Regina's head.
Emma's soft blonde curls cascading over her tight muscular body. Her soft pink lips navigating over Regina's taught nipples. Emma's sculpted slim arms holding her close, her heated breath against her neck, her soft slender hands exploring her, her mind even imagined Emma with a strap on, sheathing her dildo into the queen's tight slick center.
Regina felt her body suddenly set ablaze as these thoughts saturated her senses and she felt herself clench around the actual appendage that was inside of her as she climbed closer and closer to climax. She was moaning loudly as Robin thrust into her and before she had her release, Robin won the race, yet again, pulling out of her, rolling off of her and falling asleep. “There is no way this could be it.” She remembered thinking to herself. However this was the way it was with men. It was the way it had always been with men. Except for Graham of course. She held the huntsman’s heart, literally. He did everything, and anything, she desired.
Regina’s first experience with sex had been forced upon her. Her husband cared not for pleasure, and as time wore on, pain was his way of his own release and Regina, she was his perfect possession. After the torture the king put her through, and his consequent death, Regina had taken few to her bed chambers. She had never really saw the need. All that drivel of true love and sex being the way to communicate that love, really never interested her. Her desires were firmly rooted elsewhere, and it satisfied her in ways she was sure sex never could.
Once she won her quest for vengeance, she was left hollow. Alone, as always. Until Henry. He was the love she never knew existed. Her beautiful son. Her prince, but even he couldn’t fill the needs she started to feel in absence of adult companionship. Even Graham, as pliant as he had been, had never lived up to the hype of it all.
So yes Miss Swan was a complicated subject. She was fire and ice and made the mayor feel things no one else ever did, but she was the savior. Henry’s other mother. Snow White’s daughter.
Once Robin made his choice, and left Storybrooke with his family, Emma Swan took it upon herself to do everything she could to keep Regina's mind off of her heartache, much to the mayor’s pleasure.
They had added several nights a week to their standard Sunday night family dinner and Emma would come over and hang out with her and Henry. During that first week, Regina assumed Emma just wanted more Henry time, but when the second week rolled around, and Emma dropped Henry off with her parents for the weekend and she and Emma had a girls weekend in, Regina realized that perhaps the blonde was there for her. They had movie night, and the next day they drank wine out on the deck and spoke of their lives, nothing too heavy, but Regina felt like Emma was opening up to her a bit. It felt like she was an actual girlfriend and it was oddly comforting to the mayor. Emma slept in the guest room that weekend and when Sunday rolled around they picked up their son from the idiots apartment and they had dinner together as they always did. As a family.
It was that weekend when she realized she honestly didn’t miss Robin as much as she probably should have, considering he was her soul mate. After that realization, another revealed itself, the one where the closest orgasm she had with Robin, was fueled by thoughts of Emma. Regina had given that much thought over the next few days after girls weekend in, the conclusion of which was, Emma was with Hook. Emma was Henry's Mother. The best reason was, Emma was not interested in Regina. That is the way it would be. Regina Mills was fantastic at compartmentalizing everything in her life, and this complication was sealed up tight and pushed aside.
…Emma was with Hook…
Regina hated that filthy pirate. That man handed her over to be tortured, they could have killed her. They almost had. He had manipulated her, deftly, and left her to die all for a promise of revenge. Then he begrudgingly assisted with one good deed, only because he was forced to and Emma fell straight into bed with him! All was forgiven? Everything that scheming pirate did was completely forgotten and suddenly he was fully redeemable! If Regina needed another reason to not pursue anything with Miss Swan, that would be a very good reason indeed.
Emma Swan was out with Killian “Hook” Jones, which meant the Rabbit Hole, too much rum and sweaty drunken pawing in the parking lot at 2 am. The man was pretty, but what he lacked in romance Emma could fill the town with. She had been with him intimately, several times, since she started this relationship with the man. Started a relationship isn’t exactly how it went. It was more like she gave in to him and started a relationship. Persistence wasn’t exactly her idea of falling in love, but it was nice to be wanted so she gave it a go. She knew he didn’t move her, but the sex was pretty good, as far as she could tell. He lavished her with attention and love, and well maybe she would feel the same way, eventually?
“Probably not.” She often thought to herself. She felt like a prize the man had won for sacrificing his beloved boat for. She honestly felt like she owed him, which made her feel queasy just thinking about it. Mostly because she knew she shouldn’t feel that way, but she couldn’t help it. He brought it up every time he didn’t get his way about something and the longer their relationship went on, the more she noticed these little things he did to force her into his line of thinking.
Tonight was the first real date she had with Killian since she pretty much stopped being Regina's on call cheer coach. She knew exactly how he wanted to end the evening and that knowledge didn’t exactly thrill her.
They were walking back to Granny's Inn, where Killian was staying until he figured out what he was doing. She knew he was secretly hoping she would offer up her place as an alternative to renting, but she just couldn’t be that girl. No matter how many not so subtle hints the man dropped. She felt responsible for him, since he was basically stranded here, and it wasn’t like he had a job to pay for the room at Granny’s. She had worked out a deal with Widow Lucas where she did some odd jobs around the place doing maintenance. The old lady didn’t ask for much, and Emma had the knowledge to do what the woman had needed and she was honestly glad for it because she really didn’t want to live with Hook.
She had just moved out from her parents place into a place of her own, hers and Henry's on the weekend. She picked out and bought furniture, it was hers! For the first time in her life she was home and it was hers. She just wasn’t ready to move in with Hook. It wasn’t because it was Hook, it was because she wasn’t ready. He was good with Henry, with the exception of that time he got her kid drunk. Regina had been so angry, of course Emma was too, but Henry's adoptive mother could literally shoot daggers from her eyes if she saw fit. It wasn’t just Henry, Emma's parents liked Killian too, her father more than her mother. David was just happy to have another man around who was a macho sword fighting hero type. Her mother, well, Snow didn’t particularly rave when Emma announced her and Killian were going to be exclusive, in that oh so subtle Snow White way.
“Killian Jones? Really Emma?”
“Yeah, he’s sweet, why?”
“Captain HOOK, Emma?”
“What?! David likes him!!” Snow looked at her husband.
David put his hands up in surrender. “Leave me out of this Emma.”
Emma looked at David and mouthed the word “COWARD” behind her mother's back.
“I just don’t want you to settle, sweetheart.”
“It’s not like I’ve got a lot of choices here, Mary Margaret. Killian is interested and has a pulse.”
Now that “interested pulse” was hanging off of her as they walked up main street professing his admiration loudly. He groped at her and tried to pin her against a tree. Emma, who was nowhere near as drunk, evaded his advances successfully and continued to walk him home.
Once they were outside his room, he tried to kiss her, but it was just sloppy and Emma was over the entire evening.
“Killian, listen, sleep it off.” She pushed him back and opened his door for him. “Emmmmmaaaaa stay with meeee, luv.” He slurred and tried to look dashing leaning up against the door frame. “Please, I need you!” Emma closed her eyes, “I can’t stay, I have a morning shift tomorrow, remember?” he looked defeated but then his drunken mind pushed onwards, “Okay come over after work tomorrow?” Emma rolled her eyes, “It’s Sunday Killian, dinner with my…”
“Regina!” Hook cut her off and spat the queen’s name as if it tasted bad in his mouth.
“Uh my KID.” She corrected with a scowl. She sighs internally when she sees the anger in the man’s face start to grow. She knew where this was going, this topic has been discussed to death, however the Regina twist was new, it was still the same tune. “I don’t want to have this argument with you again Hook. They are my family. Sunday dinner is just a thing we do for Henry, you know? To make his wack-o life feel a little normal!”
Hook was drunk so what normally would have been subtle coaxing was suddenly jealous accusations. “She wants to keep you from me!” he grabbed her arm and stared her down as if the answer to his next question could be found written on her retinas. “Are you fucking her?”
“SERIOUSLY??” Emma exclaimed in exasperated surprise. She couldn’t comprehend what he was saying to her.
“Are you letting the Evil Queen into your bed!?” He asked harshly and Emma ripped her arm from his strong grasp. ”No!” she hadn’t intended on dignifying him with an answer but she felt the blush creep up her cheeks at the mere idea of a sexual relationship between herself and the mayor.
He ignored her denial as his drunken mind focused on his perceived problem. “She is always going to come between me… and your… yours and and mine happy ending!” he was angry and drunk and missed the signs the blonde was giving off that she was now angry.
Emma was more than angry. She was pissed. She left her patience back at the bar when Killian picked a fight with Happy over ownership of the pool table. She was finished stroking this man child’s ego for the night. “What makes you think YOU are my happy ending Killian? The only person that is coming between you and I, is this drunk ass fool standing in front of me. When you sober up, and grow up, give me a call!” she turned and started down the hall when her drunk boyfriend got nasty.
“That’s right run off to your queen, Swan! She’s never given anything up for you, has she? But still she’s your fucking family!!”
She spun around white cloudy swirls had replaced her normally cool green orbs, “You’re right! She IS! More than you’ll ever be!! She never makes me feel like I owe her my time! On second thought Killian, don’t call me. We are over! Asshole!” With him back peddling in the door jamb, she walked out.
She stormed home, piping mad. ‘How dare he?’ she slammed the door behind her, tearing off her clothes as she walked back to her bedroom, pulled on a sleep shirt then stormed back out into the kitchen, angrily kicking the trail of clothes she left in the hall out of the way as she broods. She opened the fridge and grabbed a beer, popped the top off the bottle and took a long drink.
‘Asshole! How he could think I’d EVER put him before Henry! And that bullshit cover about Regina! What the fuck was that??’
She plopped down on her couch and flicked on the tube. She flipped to a Gilligan's Island rerun and brooded some more. Halfway through the episode she realized she was kind of relieved about how the night ended. The extra time she had been spending with Regina, helping her get over her true love choosing his wife over her, Killian’s and her relationship had been strained.
They had that argument about how Henry and Regina would always be Emma's family and not Killian far too often. He even suggested they could have a child of their own, as if any other child she ever would have could ever replace her son!
She felt the relief wash over her and realized that she had been trying so hard to make him feel secure and chosen, she had chosen him right? All of the pressure he put on her suddenly melted away and she felt renewed. No she hadn’t chosen him, he had chosen her, but he didn’t really want her. He wanted someone who could devote themselves 24/7 to feeding his ego. Feeding his libido. How many times had he propositioned her for sex during some crazy town emergency? Or when he knew she needed to be somewhere for Henry and Regina.
‘She is my family. She is my son’s mother, she is… my friend.’
Emma stared at the screen as coconuts dropped down on Gilligan’s head and thought about how Regina never did expect anything from her. She wasn’t the savior to her, she was just Emma. Before she could consider any of that she started to slip off to sleep.
Sunday afternoon at the Sheriff's station was dreadfully dull. Sheriff Swan had finished up a week's worth of paperwork and was now searching you tube for videos of crazy dogs.
‘I should get a dog. Henry wants one, and Regina would never let one in her house. A dog is loyal. Unconditional love. Unconditional love is better than True love any day of the week. And they don’t talk back or get drunk and belligerent.’
Her phone indicator interrupted a clever pooch singing along to Stevie Wonder. “Killian, fuck off.” she barked and slammed her phone down. She looked up at the clock, it was almost 3:30, and wondered if Regina would mind an early visit?
She picked her phone back up and texted her friend.
Emma: Mind if I come over earlier for dinner?
Regina: You want to eat earlier than 5:30?
Emma: No, can I just come over after work instead of going home?
Regina: I don’t know if you can dear, but you certainly MAY.
Emma could envision the woman's sarcastic smile and chuckled
Emma: sigh. Thxs.
Regina: Is everything alright Miss Swan?
Emma: Yeah. Long story. Cu soon.
Regina: Why you insist on shortening words that are already short is beyond my comprehension.
Emma: It is faster!
Regina: Not really and it makes you sound like a 12 year old.
Emma: lol So u hav 2 12 yr olds Madam Mayor?
Regina: It certainly feels that way. See you soon.
Emma laughed and shook her head at their easy banter. Regina and she had really gotten to a great place, like actual friends. ‘It’s kind of awesome.’ She thought as she turned off the lights and locked down the station. Emma didn’t wear the uniform that was designed for the job, so there was no need to go home to change really, and if she was being honest with herself, she assumed Hook would be there waiting for her with his puppy dog ‘I’m sorry’ face and she was still angry and didn’t want to deal with it. She got into her bug and headed up the hill to the mayor's mansion.
Regina was in her work out clothes when the doorbell rang. She assumed it was Emma so she ran over to the door to let her friend in. Killian greeted her with a swarmy smile. “Your Majesty.” The title was spat with contempt. She folded her arms across her sports bra covered chest defensively. “Pirate. All out of plunder on your side of town?”
“Very funny Regina. No. I just want to warn you to stay away from MYY Emma.” Regina scrunched up her features, mouth agape and she shook her head in disbelief. “Are you drunk?” Killian swayed a bit then pointed his finger into her chest. “Stay. Away.” His blue eyes were wide as he backed down off of her porch, the finger he poked her with still pointing at her. “You’ve been warned!” he then turned and stumbled down the walk throwing his arms in the air shouting, “SHE IS MINE!!!” Regina shook her head and slammed the door.
‘What the hell was that?!’ she blew a breath out in frustration and went back to her work out. Ten minutes later the doorbell rang again. ‘You’ve GOT to be kidding me!?’ she stormed over to the door, ripping it open, purple haze glowing in her eyes. “YOU HAVE GOT A SET A BALLS ON YOU BUDDY!” she roared at…
Standing looking a little more than shocked on her door stoop. “Hi. Early? Remember?” Regina reigned in her fury and stepped aside allowing Emma to enter her home. “Is everything Ok Regina?” the brunette shook her head, “I’m sorry Em-ma, I thought you were Hook.” Emma stopped dead in her tracks and spun around. “Why?” Regina rolled her eyes and explained what had happened.
“That son of a bitch! That is it!” The sheriff started pacing in the kitchen. “I was going to give him a few days to think about his bullshit jealousy crap then maybe give it another try, but fuck him! Showing up at my son’s house? Threatening my family?? THAT’S BULLSHIT!”
“Emma, what happened?” Regina handed Emma a beer she automatically kept on hand for when the blonde visited.
“I broke up with Hook last night.” Emma admitted before taking a long swig of her beverage.
Regina brought her own glass of wine up to her lips and took a large gulp. She tried real hard not to say what she was thinking. So she said nothing, and just nodded hoping the blonde would continue her explanation.
“He was drunk and being stupid, and…” Emma jumped up on the counter, bouncing her long legs off the bottom cupboard, “I’m kinda relieved.” she admitted shyly.
Regina took this new information in, circling around the island to put some distance between herself and the blonde. “I thought you two were, in love?” Regina asked failing to keep a sarcastic tone from inflecting her words and exposing her feelings on the matter.
Emma looked down at her beer, “We were supposed to be I guess. I mean it was never anything like you and Robin.” She sighed and looked up, anywhere but Regina's all knowing eyes.
“Even Robin and I weren’t like Robin and I.” Regina mumbled too quiet for the blonde to hear.
“I felt like the prize he won for doing one self-sacrificing deed. He makes me feel like I owe him. I mean, maybe I do...” Emma let her thought trail off, she knew feeling guilty right now was not what she needed to feel to keep her distance from the man.
Regina bit the inside of her lip and was now the one who avoided eye contact.
Emma noticed the dark eyes looking suspiciously everywhere but Emma. “What Regina?”
“Nothing.” The queen replied far too quickly to be truth.
“It’s your life Miss Swan.” Regina put her hands up defensively.
“You are my friend Regina, right?” feeling a little more than pathetic she constantly needed reassurances from her friends and family that they care.
Regina swallowed hard, she took a deep breath and squeezed her eyes closed. She didn’t want to reveal these thoughts to her friend, but she felt like she was painted into a corner.
Emma noticed the mayor stalling and started to panic. "Oh fuck, what is it??? It looks bad. Is it bad??!”
“No, well, maybe. I guess. I…” Regina paused searching for the words she never thought she’d ever say to this woman. ”I always felt you deserved better than that bottom feeder.”
Emma laughed and relaxed a little. “Tell me how you really feel!”
“Ok.” Regina stood up straight and folded her arms around herself preparing for whatever backlash she was going to get from the next statements she spoke. “When you first started seeing him, I felt a little betrayed.”
Emma's eyes snapped wide and stared at the brunette who was doing everything to not look back at her. “Wait, what??? How?” she asked confused.
Regina took a deep breath and blurted, “It was like 24 hours after he had captured me and handed me over to those Pan psychopaths to be tortured. They tortured me, Emma. They could have killed me.” she lowered her gaze and her voice. “They almost did.” Her emotions about that day started to creep up and she pushed back hard. The lack of Emma’s presence that day still hurt the queen.
She was the savior, and yes there was much going on, but…
She cleared her mind of those thoughts before she lost control of her emotions all together and focused on her point. “I mean, he… it’s just… he could have stopped them, but he didn’t. He walked away. And it was like, everyone… well…. You… were just okay with that.”
Emma's mouth was open as she realized how things went down and what that meant between them. She put her hand up to cover her mouth because it just wasn’t closing on its own. “I am SO sorry Regina!” her honest response hit Regina in the gut. “Don’t be Miss Swan.” She waved the woman off and deflected the feelings as if they hadn’t hurt as much as they actually had. Regina filled her glass again and then turned to the oven to preheat. Emma jumped down off the counter and turned the woman to face her, “I swear to you.” She looked Regina right in the eye. “I am seriously sorry I made you feel that way. Your friendship means the world to me, Regina. You are the only person here who gets me. REALLY gets me. You never expect anything from me. I’m not the savior or whatever, I’m just Emma. I’m really sorry you felt like what happened didn’t matter to me. It did. It does. I, didn’t know how bad it was, I mean we’ve never talked about it and by the sounds of it my parents glossed it over. I’m really sorry.” She let go of the brunette who was clearly masking her feelings with the infamous Mayoral stance. “You are my family just as much as Henry is Regina.” She added quietly then laughed a little and pulled at the beer label on the bottle nervously. “That’s kinda why I broke up with Killian.”
“Wait, what?” The mask slipped off Regina and shock shone bright on the mayor’s face.
Emma shrugged her shoulders and answered, “He has been giving me a hard time because of Sunday night dinners, because he is a jealous douche, and last night he went too far.”
Regina looked confused. “Why would he be jealous of you spending time with your son? Did he really think you would choose him over Henry???”
Emma shook her head, “I know. I don’t know. He has some crazy ideas.” The blonde said but didn’t elaborate. Regina shook her head. “Well I’m glad you kicked him to the curb. That guy was not good enough for you!” Emma raised her bottle and clanked Regina's crystal, “Here here!” Emma took a swig of her beer and announced, “I’m gonna get a dog!” Regina almost spit out her wine at the blonde's choice of boyfriend replacements. “That’ll be a choice your son will instantly love!”