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The nights were mainly made for saying things that you can't say

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“Trick or treat!”

Chuck stared at the kids standing on the porch with a blank expression. He managed to refrained from kicking the kid who had the audacity to dress up like a Kaiju. The poorly made costume that was hanging at the seams was punishment enough. Not to mention that he was about to disappoint the little ankle biters anyway thanks to someone who couldn’t keep a handle on his sweet tooth.

“Yeah, yeah, great costumes or whatever. Real scary.” Chuck grumbled, just wanting to get this over with. They’d had to pause their movie three times already that evening thanks to the stream of kids inhabiting their neighbourhood. Why the hell had they moved to the suburbs again?

The greedy little buggers already had their bags held out, waiting for him to dump the free sweets into them. How in the hell did giving free shit to kids relate to Halloween again?

“Sorry kids, you’ll have to make do with these thanks to the ars–”

He stopped short. No way was he losing more of his money to the swear jar reserved exclusively for expletives within the earshot of the neighbourhood kids again, especially when it was at the fault of Raleigh this time. And why wasn’t that coward answering to these kids instead of him anyway?

“You’ll have to make do with these because someone ate all damned the sweets.”

Damn didn’t count as swearing.

His voice had risen at the mention of said culprit and in answer Raleigh’s voice carried out from the living room. “I said I was sorry!”

“Tell that to them!” Chuck called back, and then turned his attention to the kids once more. “Enjoy the paper clips, kids!”

He slammed the door on them before they could react and headed back into the living room to slump down on the sofa next to Raleigh, who was wearing a well-deserved guilty expression on his face. As he should.

“You’re such an asshole.” Raleigh whined.

“Says the bloke who ate all the kids’ sweets.”