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Glitter, Judo-Flips, Spoons, and Glasses

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Prompt: You did what?


After the Grand Magic Games, it became an almost monthly thing. Sting and Rogue were sitting in a booth at Fairy Tail with the other dragon slayers, talking quietly about when they were kids and what they were up to currently. Up until this point, their meetings had gone ignored by the majority of Fairy Tail, but when they broke into raucous laughter over something that seemed to embarrass a certain pinkette, the louder members of the guild became much more curious.

The rest of team Natsu, Cana, Mira, and a handful of others crept closer. Natsu blurted out what sounded like a random string of sylables, but the other slayers responded in the same way. A few of them gave up once they realized the conversation was in Dravic, unaware that they were all prone to switching languages to better say one thing or another.

The small group watched Sting continuously poke Natsu in the stomach, muttering, "Come on. Come on," repeatedly, and then the watched his arm get pinned to the booth by an irate Natsu.

"No," Natsu said firmly, and after that, he said a word that Gray reconized. It wasn't Dravic, it was actually from a pre-magic-era language that the ice mage couldn't remember the name of, but it was one he'd heard his rival use several times.

"What does that even mean?" Gray asked.

Natsu's head turned around fast enough to give a normal person whiplash, "What does what mean? Waltersobchakeit?"

"Yeah, that." More of the guild was listening in now, realizing that the slayers might let them in on the odd conversation.

Natsu and Gajeel shared a glance before blurting the translation in unison, "You're not wrong, you're just an asshole."

The guild burst into laughter, shouts of "There's a word for that," and, "What the hell," were easily heard over the laughter.

"So that's what that mea-" Sting paused, face screwing up slightly, and he glared at the oldest two slayers. A hand flew up to his chest in a mock hurting gesture, "I'm sorry, I'm the asshole?"

All four dragon slayers nodded enthusiastically, and Sting's jaw dropped and his voice rose an octave, "Well fuck you, too!"

While their responses varried, the slayers didn't hesitate to answer Sting's request.

"No thanks, I'm into girls." Gajeel.

"I'm a lesbian." Wendy.

"Not my type." Natsu.

"Maybe later, love." Rogue.

Half of the guild members were laughing violently, and some of them on the floor, unable to keep themselves upright. Gray had sent himself into a coughing fit from the lack of air.

Natsu was watching him slightly concerned, "You okay, Ice-princess?" Gray just waved him off.

After the guild calmed down, Mira asked the question everyone else wanted too, "What caused you to say that anyways?"

Natsu flushed and the other slayer giggled, "They brought up an inside joke from when we were kids." He refused to look her in the eyes, "Don't worry about it." Some started to complain, but the mischievous grin on his face changed their minds, "Besides, there are much better ones."

Across from him, Wendy was smirking, "Like all the prank wars we used to get into."

"Those," Rogue commented, "were not prank wars. They were prank slaughters." He shuddered. "You and Natsu always kicked our," he made a quick gesture to Gajeel and his idiotic boyfriend, "asses." The other two shuddered as well.

Wendy rolled her eyes, "That's because the best thing you could come up with was a pitfall. A pitfall, guys."

Natsu rolled the thought around in his head, "She's forgetting that we were just really good at pranks..." He waved his hand in between Sting and Wendy to stop the small argument that was starting. "It wasn't just that they were bad at it, but the we were really good at it. Do you not remember the summer they busted a spider egg sack on my head and what we retaliated?" Despite bringing it up himself, the mention of the spiders made him shiver. "I hate spiders." He could handle a couple at a time, but screw anymore than that. Many others in the guild felt similarly, shuddering when he mentioned it.

The other three slayers looked at him like he'd lost his mind, and had to think about it. Rogue was the first to remember, "Oh hell no. I am not reliving that mess." He smacked his hands down on the table as he stood, and then he left the room.

It clicked for Gajeel and Sting at about the same time, and they stared at Natsu open mouthed, "You wouldn't," Sting muttered hopefully.

Natsu smirked, and Gajeel slammed his head against the table. "Get it over with."

"Wendy was even angrier than I was about the spider mess, so we came up with the best revenge plan ever," Natsu began.

"Natsu and I took several tubs of glue and dumped it on them at about three in the morning," Wendy continued.

"As as soon as we dumped the glue, I set of fire crackers all around them to startle them into running into the field." The guild was openly gaping at the two them, shocked at the intricacies of the prank. "Once they started running around like chickens with their heads cut off, we started shooting them with paintball pellets filled with fine pink glitter."

"Let me tell you something," Gajeel had lifted his head back up, and the look on his face could only be described as exasperation, "that shit gets everywhere and it never comes out."

The guild had burst into laughter again and Rogue came back to his seat.


Gray had heard most of the stories that they were sharing from Natsu on his bad days. He liked to talk when he was upset, and Gray was more than wiling to listen to the dragon slayer's odd ramblings.

Not that he'd admit that to anyone, after all, it was their little secret.

"-and Grandine-" Wendy was struggling to talk through her laughter, "Grandine was so angry that she walked right over to to Weisslogia, and she judo flipped him off a cliff!" It had been a while since Gray had seen his guild mates laugh this uncontrollably for this long.

"Wait until Natsu tells them the chocolate story." Gray made a subtle motion to get the pinkette's attention, and he mouthed the word, "chocolate."

Natsu nearly fell out of his chair at the memory alone, "Guys, Guys." He smacked the table trying to get the other slayer's to listen, but it took a few tries, "We skipped over what might possibly be the funniest story about our parents." He was wide-eyed and still trying not to laugh, but his resolve held strong. "so now that you all know that the dragons had human forms, you also need to know that during the early years of our raining, we lived in a city of inhumans." He paused letting the information sit in, " You all know how Erza is with her strawberry cake, yeah?" Everyone nodded. "Well multiply that by a thousand and that's how attached to chocolate Igneel is."

There were several murmurs of disagreement, and nearly had to shout to get everyone to be quiet. "Anyways, Metalicana decided he was going to test it with Igneel's absolute favorite variety of chocolate: Homemade dark chocolate fudge." Natsu's stomach unconsciously rumbled at the thought of it, and it sent us all into a round of laughs. "He tried to take some of it out of the pan, with Igneel still in the room. Igneel realized what he was doing before he got halfway there, so he took the wooden stirring spoon and smacked the counter right beside Metalicana's had as a warning."

The dragon slayers were loosing it, already laughing at what was to come. "All of us had heard the noise, and we came running in there trying to figure out what was going on, and it honestly wasn't hard. We all left once we realized it would probably go south. About ten minutes later, Metalicana tried it again, but this time Igneel hit his arm so hard that the spoon broke in half."

"So of course my dad, "Gajeel began, "being the eloquent person he is shouted-" Natsu had grabbed Asuka and plugged her ears before anyone else could react. "'Shit fuck you cunt-fuck what the fucking fuck was that for?'" Most of the guild had their heads thrown back in laughter, and others stared mortified at the language that Metalicana had used in front of children.

Natsu had to jump onto the table to regain everyone's attention, "GUYS, WE AREN'T EVEN TO THE FUNNY PART YET!" AFter everone had calmed themselves, which took much longer than it should have, Natsu continued the story, "As if the giant welt on his arm wasn't enough, Igneel handed him the broken spoon and asked him to throw it away for him." Some people began laughing again, and Natsu had to shush them. "Metalicana was a firm believer in the third time being the charm, and he shouldn't have been. He tried it one more time, and Igneel," Natsu's reserve finially broke, and he was nearly hysterical as he tried to force the end of the story past his lips.,"Igneel chased him out of the kitchen while wielding a metal spoon and screaming, 'Metalicana I love you like your my fucking brother, but if you fucking touch my fucking chocolate one more fucking time, I'm going to beat your ass with a fucking spoon!'"

The guild had lost it. There wasn't a single person not laughing, and if there had been, it would be because they were physically incapable of doing so.

"I love my idiot."


Sting didn't like to be embarrassed, and he was more than willing to admit to being a petty asshole when he wanted to be, which is why he had a plan to embarrass the hell out of Natsu. There was one thing the slayer hated to admit about himself that no one but the slayer knew about.

He walked around half-blind all the time, because he hated the glasses he was supposed to wear. All slayers had enhanced senses, but usually one was very stronger than the rest, and another was weaker. Wendy, Sting, and Rogue all have sharp eyesight, but a weaker sense of taste. Gajeel has stronger eyesight with a weaker sense of touch. Natsu has an extremely enhanced sense of smell with horrible eyesight to compensate for it.

However, there's another thing that most people seem to forget about the pinkette: He was infinitely smarter than he acted. Natsu had learned to see without actually seeing, and by praising that fact, he was going to make him accidentally reveal that he couldn't see for shit.

Sting cackled. "Gods, I'm a douche." He mentally shrugged, "Eh. At least it's not things that would make him commit murder if I ever mentioned them."


Gray knew something was up the second he saw the evil glint in Sting's eyes, and apparently he wasn't the only one.

Before he, or anyone else could stop it, the blond had blurted a sentence that caught everyone's attention, "Natsu created a magic when we were kids." The fire user, who had been taking a sip of his drink, choked on his hot tea and spluttered as his face reddened exponentially.

Levy was in his face in an instant, "You did what?" She squealed, and the slayers recoiled. "What is it? How does it work? Is it fire based? How long did it take you? Wait, Sting said 'when you were kids', so it had to be before you joined Fairy Tail! How old were you? Have you ever used it in a fight? Why didn't y-" Gajeel clasped his hand firmly over the bluenette's mouth, and she blushed. She mumbled something that sounded like an apology from behind his hand, and he let go, leaving the solid-script mage to stare hopefully at Natsu.

Natsu was desperately trying to bury himself in his scarf, and he wouldn't look at anyone.

"Of course he won't. I'm the only person in Fairy Tail who knows, and that's just because he runs into walls when he tired and I bothered to ask."

It took several minutes of prodding to get Natsu to respond, and when he did, it was quieter than they'd ever heard him speak. "I didn't created a new magic, I just found a different way to use magic." He let that sit before he attepmted to answer all of Levy's questions. "It lets me see a full three-hundred-sixty degrees around myself and behindsolid objects, I just push magic theough the ethernano in the air to make the vibrate and tell me what's there like echo location, no, I don't know how to answer that, yes before I joined Fairy Tail, I was six, always, and I didn't really cath that last question..." He trailed off, thouroghly attempting to avoid the question he was sure Sting wanted to be asked.

"If they found out why he created it, then he'd have to admit to wearing the glasses. I can't believe this dork is seriously worried about their reactions to a pair of glasses."

"But why would you bother to figure that out?" It was Lucy who asked the question, and Levy flicked her forehead.

"If you have a three-sixty veiw during a battle, enemies can't sneak up on you," she explained, "Right, Natsu?"

Natsu almost confirmed her, seeing his out, but Sting cut him off, "Sure that's a bonus, but that's not why he created it." His voice bounced as he said it, and their guild mates only seemed to get more and more confused.

That's when Gray finially got tired of just watching. He snuck over to Happy and reached into his pack. The exceed, after realizing what Gray was doing, whispered sonething about it being buried at the bottom. Gray pulled out the black case and removed the thickest pair of glasses he'd ever seen.

Gray crept up behind the oblivious, embarrased slayer, and slid the glasses on him faster than he could react. Natsu's eyes seemed to focus all at once, and he jerked backwards violently. "You," he said to Levy, "are a whole lot closer to my face than I thought you were." He then turned around and glared at Gray, the effect being lessened by thick glasses, "You're an ass." He said simply.

"Hey now," Gray responded, "you shouldn't call people by their defining features. It's rude." The ice mage stuck his tongue out at Natsu, and the rest of the guild openly gaped at the duo.

"You can when it's their only feature," Natsu fired back.

"Excuse you, I have several amazing features suck as my gorgeous face." Gray gestured to himself with both hands, but once he saw the look in Natsu's eyes, he knew he messed up.

"That's your face? I assumed it was your ass considering there was shit coming out of the hole in it."

Gray opened and closed his mouth like a fish, "I don't have a comeback for that."

"You need glasses?" Lucy asked, and the quiet of the guild snapped in half. People started blurting questions faster than Natsu could regester them.

Watching his "secret" boyfriend slowly become more and more overwhelmed was not on Gray's to do list today. He turned the floor into ice and created a wall in between the two of them and the others, then he snatched Natsu by the arm, dragging him out of the guld and into Magnolia's surrounding forest.

Once they were far enough away, they collapsed on the ground. "Why did you do that?" Natsu whispered.

"It wouldn't have taken them long to figure it out anyways, and you know it."Gray yanked the dragon slayer into his arms. They stayed that way for a while, staring at the clouds in silence. Gray leaned forward so that he could whisper in the slayer's ear, "Your glasses are adorable, anyways." Natsu nearly shoved him, but Gray kept the pinkette's arms pinned tightly to the side of his body as he pecked Natsu on the cheek.

"They are not."

"Are too."

"Are not."

"Are too."

"Are not."

"Are not."

"Are too."

"So you agree I'm right?" Gray asked smugly, and Natsu shot him a disapproving look when he realized what had happened. "You do know we'll have to go back there right?"

"Not right now we don't." Natsu burried his face into Gray's neck, inhaling the scent of peppermint and pine trees.

Gray smiled softly, "Yeah, I'd probably punch Sting for being a dick." Natsu snorted, and the vibration from it caused Gray to laugh. The ice mage kissed his forehead gently, "Besides, I think staying right here is perfect."


The two of them didn't move until the sun began to set.