Chapter 1: Prologue
Ichimatsu has learned to hate Alphas, as this time one had royally screwed him over. He’ll never forgive them; they can go fuck themselves instead of him. Sure, it feels amazing to take them, at least for a short moment, but they always end up being difficult about using condoms or they kick him out of their apartment as soon as they’re done with him. Some are shitty enough not to even make him cum if they finish first. Then they act like they don’t know him because they’re ashamed to have done it with a male Omega, if they don't outright humiliate him for letting them do him.
The last one took the cake however: he purposefully pieced the condom. The bastard disappeared into the night while he was asleep and the next morning, Ichimatsu wakes up to a sticky note on his condom box. “I pierced the condom. You male omegas are all the same: can’t keep your legs closed. What’s wrong with you? Aren’t you ashamed you’re such a pussy you grew one? That’ll teach you to be a slut you fucking error of nature. :)”
Great, just great. Like he has the budget and time to care for a child. In a way, he mostly has himself to blame: with his shitty personality, he’s can’t keep jobs as he gets meltdowns. And good luck getting hired as something other than customer service as an Omega with everyone thinking you can't lift anything heavier than a purse.
He comes home after another fruitless day of job searching. His stomach isn’t helping as at the sixth month, it’s quite clear to everyone that he’s not just fat. It’s too late to abort… not that he could do it. He doesn’t have the heart to and it’s not like he didn’t try to convince himself to do it. He made appointments a handful of times but couldn’t muster to reach the clinic, bursting into quiet tears in the bus each time as he couldn’t bring himself to ask for the stop. And the one time he entered the clinic? Fuck, he stood in the entrance for a few minutes, completely frozen, and as soon as a receptionist asked if she could help him, he simply rushed out while mumbling a stream of apoligies.
He slides the key in the lock of his apartment door and… it doesn’t turn. Actually it’s pretty jammed in there. His heart sinks: the eviction notices were not empty threats in the end. It’s fine, he’ll manage… he did it before. It’s not too cold outside yet and he knows of a safe homeless community close by. He’ll be fine. He’ll be fine.
He goes to the dumpster in the back of the building and does find his things there. He grabs his backpack, rice cooker, as many blankets and clothes he can put on and wrap around himself, a bowl, a spoon and toiletries. He shouldn’t take more, but he grabs a picture frame of his family. He hasn’t seen them in a few years and he doesn’t want to burden them, but he still loves and misses them.
Luck isn’t on his side… well it never really was, or he would have a job, not be pregnant and would be a beta. But that’s the straw that breaks the camel’s back: the small empty lot that housed the homeless community has a fast food restaurant being built on it now. It’s cruel, it’s not fair. He has nowhere to go. He roams the streets, trying to find the new spot were the homeless might be.
After a few hours of searching, Ichimatsu grows weak and hungry. He sits down at the entrance of an alleyway to take a break. The sun lowers on the horizon, and gripped with hunger and by the cold, Ichimatsu passes out on the sidewalk as snow slowly starts to powder the ground.
Chapter 2: Safe and Warm
Ichimatsu's luck turns, but he has yet to decide if it's for the best or the worst.
Ichimatsu has always believed the universe seeks balance. And though he has always focused on balancing good luck with bad things, he never expects bad luck to turn around and be balanced by good luck.
He wakes up in a soft, warm bed under a pile of blankets as well as wearing clean clothes. Seems from the scent like his body has been washed as well. The sound of old american jazz coming from another room can be heard through the wall, as well as a voice singing along in bad English. There is a slight aroma of soup coming through and Ichimatsu feels his mouth water. He’s so hungry. He needs to eat, and more importantly, his child needs to eat.
He looks around and spots a large maine coon sleeping at the foot of the bed, cooing sleepily as it hears the stranger stir in his bed. Ichimatsu looks around the room, trying to understand what kind of person took him in. Why not leave him at a shelter or at the hospital?
The room is mostly white with modern art as decoration. Really not the kind of decor Ichimatsu would pick, but it’s not his room anyways. What catches his attention is a picture on the nightstand. He recognizes them immediately: his five brothers standing around their parents as well as some strangers with a baby in the mix. Different haircuts, different clothes… he missed a lot, didn’t he?
He doesn’t know what kind of luck could have brought him in the home of one of his brothers, but he won’t question it. At least not now. He nuzzles his pillow to try and find out who it belongs to. It’s been so long that it takes him a moment, but he knows it’s a scent of a beta, that it’s a scent he always found reassuring and that he associates with bed time. It’s Karamatsu.
His suspicions are confirmed as a head with thick eyebrows and a side part that probably makes him think he looks suave pops up in the door frame. His inquisitive expression quickly turns into a large smile and he walks in with a tray. “Ichimatsu!” Is all he seems able to say. It looks like he wants to talk, but as soon as the tray is set on Ichimatsu’s lap, the younger brother starts stuffing his face.
A meaty udon with a big helping of miso soup, a glass of milk as well as bananas and pickled plums. It’s a relief: it’s not ramen, it’s not powdered milk, plain rice or multivitamins. It’s fresh food he hasn’t eaten in ages and that his baby hasn’t received before. Karamatsu leaves the room so he may eat at his pace. Once he’s finished, Ichimatsu lets the beautiful cat come and lick the last few drops of soup at the bottom of the bowl while running his fingers through the soft fur. This is what his older brother comes back to. Karamatsu puts the empty tray away to sit beside his little brother, concern on his face.
“Ichimatsu, you should have told us you’re hitting a rough patch. You could have called one of us or gone home.” He very gently scolds, looking like he wants to hold his brother in his arms; but he’s never certain how to deal with him so he holds back. He doesn’t want to make Ichimatsu uncomfortable the moment he’s back in his life.
“I would’ve just been a burden.” He replies truthfully with a shrug while rubbing his stomach. Why would he deserve anyone caring about him? Even that child shouldn’t have to know him: he’ll find them a worthy family.
“You’re not a burden, my little brother. Those are things you shouldn’t say about yourself. I’m happy I found you: now I know you’re somewhere safe.” Ichimatsu doesn’t answer to this: where did Karamatsu expect him to be? Though, considering his track record, he wouldn’t blame anyone for assuming he’s dead or in the streets. He’s been homeless once or twice and dead… well it’s just best not to think too hard about how close he’s been to that.
“Do you have a home to go to?” Ichimatsu quietly shakes his head at Karamatsu's question. His older brother then hesitantly points at his stomach. “And the father?” Ichimatsu shrugs, feeling shame weight him down. What kind of shitty life is he bringing that child to? He really ought to give them away.
“Doesn’t matter.” He mumbles, only to receive a very concerned frown.
“I think that matters a lot: you need someone to support you and help you raise that little guy.” Ichimatsu clenches his jaw, irritated. Karamatsu is only concerned about his well-being, but the younger perceives it as criticism: that he’s a bad parent even if the little thing isn’t even born.
“Good thing I don’t intend on raising it.” He concentrates his energy on petting the cat lying by his side as he becomes scared of looking at his older brother. “I’m just useless garbage, someone else’s going to do a much better job.” There is a silence hanging between them as Karamatsu is trying to find the right thing to say, but he can’t. He’s always been bad at dealing with Ichimatsu. “How did you find me?” Even if he’s the one who brought it up, the older brother isn’t angry that the heavier subject is getting canned.
“Oh, a waitress from a bar I sometimes play at saw you, and since she knows we are sextuplets, she ringed me. I’m glad she did, you were in a really bad part of town.”
Ichimatsu looks around him and raises a brow. “You make that kind of money playing in seedy bars?”
Karamatsu shakes his head. “No, that’s just on the side, and the bars are lovely. I do podcasts and part time at the florist down the street.” Ichimatsu shakes his head a little: well, it’s all things he can see Karamatsu doing and having fun with. Good to know at least one of the six useless NEETs is doing something of himself.
“What about you Ichimatsu, what happened? You were wearing a lot of layers of clothes and blankets and carrying some supplies…” Ichimatsu feels even more embarrassed now that he knows the difference between them. It’s not enormous, but acceptable success versus complete failure is still humiliating.
“I was evicted. I was gathering my stuff to find the other homeless but… well I didn’t. Glad no one looted me at least.”
Karamatsu shakes his head. “You only had about five hundred Yen in your wallet.” Ichimatsu laughs: this is really ridiculous, how low he has fallen.
“No, that’s about all I have.”
“Why were you evicted?” Ichimatsu sighs; better get rid of the embarrassment right away he guesses.
“I wasn’t paying my rent, because I couldn’t. I was fired because... I don’t remember. I was probably rude too many times. Kinda hard to get a job when you hate customers, have bad references for customer service and that it’s just those employers that even look at your CV.” Karamatsu appears uncomfortable once again, knowing it’s the worst kind of job for someone like Ichimatsu. But he also know it’s pretty true that Omegas don’t have as much chance in physical labor, which he knows would actually work well for his little brother.
“Ichimatsu, I live alone and comfortably. If you want to stay a while, I won’t mind.” The older says with a smile that he tries to make compassionate but his little brother knows he’s just proud of himself for being a hero.
“What’s that mean?”
“For how long? Because you’re fine now, but you’re eventually gonna get tired of taking care of my ass.” The older shrugs. “At least until you have your baby, if you want to put him up for adoption.”
Ichimatsu looks at his brother with suspicion. “That’s in three months.”
The older’s eyes widen and what the omega expects to be the older going back on his words, he finds the opposite. “You’re that far in?” Why does his older brother have to be so nice? Well, at least it’s refreshing between the shit customers, shit alphas, shit managers, shit landlords and the thugs roaming the streets.
“And what if I keep it? Not that I will.” Ichimatsu’s not sure why he’s asking the question: there’s no way he’s keeping that poor baby.
“We never know. And… well I guess I’d see with our brothers, as a family, but I’d be happy to help you.” Ichimatsu isn’t going to argue with his overoptimistic brother right now: that’s an awfully long time to be single and to put his own life on pause for someone else.
There is a moment of silence again, only broken by Karamatsu’s laughter. “You’re falling asleep sitting up, brother. Go back to sleep. I’ll put leftovers in the fridge, but you can help yourself to whatever you need.” Ichimatsu nods and slips back under the covers, too tired to snark anything. It was indeed a tiring conversation. He closes his eyes and drifts to sleep just after hearing a soft “I’m glad you’re here.” and feeling a kiss on his forehead.
When Ichimatsu gets back up, his older brother is in the living room, the television is turned on but the volume is awfully quiet. It’s not like he’s watching it however as he’s focused over a piece of paper. The younger brother approaches curiously, wondering what is getting Karamatsu so absorbed.
The world has been cruel to you
Are you used to be beat down?
You’re sinking, about to drown
Like you’re done through and through
It’s just me
And not the world
The world has been cruel to you
But I’m not it
And I’m here for a rescue
Will you take my hand?
“You write your songs?” Karamatsu startles and loudly hits his knee against the kotatsu which makes him yelp and then hiss at the pain. Ichimatsu gets a chuckle out of it and decides to head to the kitchen before laughing too hard.
“I didn’t notice you, brother.” Karamatsu explains with an embarrassed smile, hands around his knee. Meanwhile, Ichimatsu pours himself a glass of milk and grabs some bean buns he then throws in the microwave. “I’ve always written my songs.” Ichimatsu is surprised: he thought his songs were things he improvised on the go they were so bad. But It looks like he’s improving. It’s still not great, but better at least. “This is nothing but a first draft however.”
Ichimatsu returns in the living room, eyes darting here and there to notice the decor. It’s decent, warmer than the one in his bedroom. There are a lot of decoration inspired by music and guitar, even some records on the wall… and a record player! No glitter in sight either! Ichimatsu is getting suspicious that Karamatsu didn’t make his own decor at all.
“You’re stuck?” Karamatsu nods and even moves a little to let his little brother sit by his side. “Your song feels hesitant, like you don’t know the person you’re talking to.”
“Yeah, make it more direct.”
The world is cruel to you
You’re used to its beatdowns
Sinking, about to drown
You’re done through and through
It’s just me
Not the world
The world is cruel to you
But I’m not it
I’m here for a rescue
I beg you take my hand
I promise it won’t strike
There’s only one thing I’d like
And it’s you back to homeland
“Ah… that helped me continue.” Karamatsu smiles, pretty proud of the improvement.
“Should I take it personally? The song?” Ichimatsu asks, cheek resting in his hand as he drinks his milk.
“N-no… I just get some inspirations sometimes...” The older of the two reads the lyrics again. Okay, maybe it’s about the situation with Ichimatsu. But it feels good to let it out in song like this; he knows Ichimatsu won’t listen to someone asking to letting himself be helped. Just from what Ichimatsu has told him, he can imagine the last few years have been hard on him. Jumping from one soul sucking job to another, all on his own, no stable relationships and now pregnant of six months already.
That’s something right out of those sad teen novels. All that is missing is abuse, rape and drugs. Karamatsu pales at those ideas, hoping his little brother really has told him the worst of it. Hearing that his situation is even worse than what he thinks it is would tear his big brother heart to shreds. Karamatsu wraps an arm around his little brother, in sudden need of comfort after those dark ideas. Ichimatsu doesn’t protest or reciprocate and only keeps snacking. “How are the others?” He ends up asking meekly between two bites. He never likes to show that he cares, but after three years and some months, anyone would ask.
That just gives Karamatsu a reason to hear himself talk, so he won’t tease his little brother about it. “Let’s see! Osomatsu has just started doing part time as security at a pachinko parlor because Choromatsu has threatened to kick him out if he doesn’t find a job. Choromatsu got a promotion and is a team leader at his job. I think he’s doing some data entry. Jyushimatsu and Homura are together, they have a baby of a year and married just before he was born. He’s working construction and I think they have their own little baseball team. And Todomatsu got engaged last year to Atsushi and they’re going to marry in April. I’m so proud of them. Well outside of Osomatsu, but at least he’s getting better.”
Ichimatsu lowers his head: they all got busy after getting kicked out, huh? Not surprising it’s him and Osomatsu who ended up the worst ones however. He feels Karamatsu squeeze his shoulder and looks up at him with a sigh. “I know I haven’t heard the whole story yet, but I’m proud of you too, Ichimatsu. It looks like you had a hard time, but you’re here now and that makes me happy.”
Karamatsu tries to keep himself from smiling, but he can’t help it. He pats his little brother on the shoulder. “It’s good to see you haven’t changed much.”
The younger gets up with a growl and it makes the older smile even more. Yup, he was sleepy and tired earlier, but there is his Ichimatsu coming back now that he slept and ate. “Eat some fruits, Ichimatsu! It’s good for your baby.” The older calls as he sees his brother heading back in the kitchen.
Chapter 3: Respite
Baby bump bonding and foreshadowing.
(Edit: I made a mistake with the title before. Nothing else changed.)
It’s barely been a week, but it already feels like routine for Karamatsu. He could live his whole life coming home to Ichimatsu who has taken to cook and clean. It even looks like he has become good friends with his cat, Ooji. He’s caught himself thinking that his little brother looks cute with his big belly and an apron. But it’s normal, right? He’s always thought that even if mysterious, Ichimatsu looks cute too. It’s just a big brother thing to find his little brother adorable!
A couple of things have really been bothering him. For one, he hasn’t touched the baby yet. He has seen it kicking but has not dared ask to touch. His little brother is like a cranky cat after all and easily snaps so he doesn’t want to upset him. Plus, the end of the week is coming and a delicate subject will have to be addressed as, usually, one of the five invites everyone over to hang out: and this week, it’s Karamatsu’s turn to host on Saturday.
Ichimatsu is eating ice cream at the kotatsu and sharing his spoon with the cat to let it steal a lick or two. His older brother has really taken to buying dairy, fruits and vegetables for him ever since he's been looking up how to care for a pregnant omega in his free time. He knows it’s not realistic to expect Ichimatsu to raise the child, but he’s realizing that maybe, one day, he wouldn’t mind getting his own. Though he’d need to find an omega or a female beta for that… and would need to get laid as well.
At least it feels nice not to live alone anymore, to have someone to come home to and share his bed with. It feels nostalgic to fall asleep next to Ichimatsu. When you’re used to falling asleep next to five other people, living alone in an apartment fells well lonely, even with Ooji.
Karamatsu joins his little brother, giving him a kiss on the forehead as he’s gotten into the habit of lately. Ichimatsu doesn’t complain, nor does he try to avoid them, so he must not mind it. The older takes that as a win. “Hey, Ichimatsu? I huh… can you feel your baby move?”
The younger turns his head to see some sparkles of interest in his big brothers’ eyes. ”Yeah… if you want to touch, just ask.” He replies bluntly.
Ichimatsu barely has the time to shrug that Karamatsu’s hand, rough from handling the guitar and flowers, is gently pressed against his bare belly as he tries to find a little hand or foot. Ichimatsu grabs his wrist and moves it to a better spot on the bump. “Shouldn’t take long. It’s just been going at it since dinner.” Just as Ichimatsu says it, Karamatsu feels a little hand against his and smiles as if he’s experiencing the most amazing thing in the world.
“You said Homura had a baby. She didn’t let you touch her bump?” Ichimatsu asks, turning a bit red from being looked upon with so much glee.
“Ah… no, she and our Jyushimatsu were living at her parent’s home at the time. They’re back in Tokyo, however.” The older simply replies, too fascinated to muster some flowery speech. Karamatsu doesn’t take his hand off, gently caressing the bump for both his brother’s and the baby’s sake. He’s just happy to have them, already getting attached to the little one. Those two feel so… homely.
“Ichimatsu… why do you keep referring to your baby as “it”?” The younger shrugs, knowing it’s cruel to refer to a person with that pronoun. “It’s like the alleycats. They weren’t mine and that baby’s not mine. I’m just growing it.” He tries to hide that he cares, that in actually he's terrified of becoming attached, but Karamatsu can hear he is getting choked up and only smiles sadly at his brother. “He’s lucky to have someone like you growing him.”
He must have said the wrong thing again because Ichimatsu slaps his hand away from his bump and gets up, leaving an excited Ooji behind as the cat is now trying to lick at the ice cream directly from the bowl while Karamatsu is trying to stop him.
Once the bathroom door is closed behind his brother, Karamatsu hears the distinctive click of its lock.
Chapter 4: Poems From a Bleeding Heart
Poems from the Heart
Poems of the Veins
O blood stained Art
Expose past Pains
Reference to past self-harm and depression. Also some poem analysis.
“Am I just the wrong way
Is it just what I say
Always without meaning to
All I do is I hurt you
Isn’t it a mean trick of destiny
For me to fail at your mystery
Maybe I simply try too much
Yet it never feels as such
I’m nothing but a fool
To you my jewel
With enough nerve
To attempt to serve
Rather than be my own
I can’t leave you alone”
“You really need to start getting better at your syllable count or you’re going to give yourself headaches.” Ichimatsu interrupts as he gets out of the bathroom, completely nude and hair still wet. Karamatsu can’t help but stare: his little brother already took on a few pounds in the few days he’s been there and that warms his heart. He can see his thighs becoming beautifuly full like he remembers them, gently squeezing thick lips which themselves protect a cute little vestigial penis. All that with a plush ass and soft little breasts, the older is in the impossibility of understanding people who call omega males ugly.
Karamatsu wanted to slap himself for defiling his brother with his thoughts. He averts his eyes, blushing heavily. Something’s seriously wrong with him. “What? I forgot to bring a change of clothes.” The younger mumbles, hurrying away as he as he covers his chest and genitals in shame: he has been ashamed of his body ever since his omega nature made him so different from the others.
Karamatsu decides it’s best to change the subject as quickly as his brain can load in a new one in. “Oh, that’s right, you were in the poetry club in middle school!” Ichimatsu groans loud enough to be heard outside the bedroom. “Don’t react like that, my little Ichimatsu. I remember you were very talented. The others kept asking you to go back on stage.” Karamatu doesn’t get interrupted, so he continues. “My favourite was Crimson. You remember? I never did understand the title however.”
Ichimatsu chuckles in disgust as he comes back in the living room in a fluffy pajamas. “Everyone liked that one, but one got what it’s about.”
Without much hesitation, Ichimatsu starts reciting the poem he repeated the most in school.
Stop the drop by drop waterfall
For one moment, for them all
You do not quench my thirst
Always back to you at my worst
One day you’ll carry me
Only then will I be free”
“I still like it, it’s very melancholy.” Karamatsu comments with a moved smile.
Ichimatsu shakes his head. “That’s why I hate it. Everyone liked it but no one knew why. My poems were never meant to be liked.”
Karamatsu appears confused: why would someone make art that’s not meant to be enjoyed? “I always felt it was about crying. I never saw you cry, so I thought it was about being free once you’ll be able to cry.”
Ichimatsu shakes his head, sinister. “It’s called crimson because it’s the color of the spring.”
Karamatsu furrows his brows, pensive. “Mmhh, blood doesn’t make sound and is thick I guess. I don’t understand how it’d make you stop crying however. Next verse makes sense, it hurts to receive a cut and… then I’m lost at the last part.”
Ichimatsu sighs. “I was… I was harming myself when I wrote it, Shittymatsu. Stop the drop by drop waterfall , it helped me channel emotional pain but it never really worked that well You do not quench my thirst and I was always hoping one day I’d cut too deep and bleed to death. I didn’t see any other way to stop suffering One day you’ll carry me, Only then will I be free .”
The older of the two looks pale and sad, hurting that he was too selfishly caught up in the melancholy of the poem to recognizes the cry for help. “I see what you mean now. I don’t enjoy it anymore. It’s still beautifully written, though. I remember you made happy ones as well.”
Ichimatsu’s smile becomes amused. “Those were about cats.”
Karamatsu smirks. “But you also wrote such beautiful melancholy love poems.”
Ichimatsu frowns, getting defensive. “I never wrote sad love poems...” Karamatsu beams as he hurries to a drawer and takes out a clearfile with kittens on it and a label reading 'Ichimatsu'. He takes a page out and clears his throat.
“Hair and eyes of dark hue
Yet You tint me of blue
You are my swirling void
You I cannot avoid
Your heart of gold
Always too bold
Mine beating solo
Weak for Your tango
Moral and carnal sin
My home against Your skin
I will never tell
I am under Your spell
Moments with You
Torture in bliss
No single kiss
Love and my soul
Will not part whole
Soon won’t coexist
Disappear into the mist”
Ichimatsu’s jaw hangs stupidly wide open and he has to take a seat. It feels like he’s just been hit by a truck as memories he very willingly suppressed come back to him. Karamatsu mistakenly takes it as the younger finally appreciating his own talent and picks out another poem.
“Against my lips
Under my skin
Hold my hips
Make a sin
Love is wrong
Inside my throat”
Karamatsu finds his brother to now be beet red. He’s about to take another poem out, but the younger is quick rush up to him and rip the clearfile out of his older brother’s hand, though he's unable to take the page Karamatsu is already holding. “Did I really read that in front of people?!” Ichimatsu wonders if he was just that much of a masochist at the time or if he truly had stopped caring. Karamatsu, on the other hand, doesn’t seem to get what is wrong with the poems he just read.
“They are tragic and beautiful! I’m sure other people also could relate to them. There was also 'Scent'!
Scent of you
Scent of hue
Scent of blue
I love you”
Karamatsu feels himself being pulled forwards and he reels back, shocked by the strength in the pregnant omega who doesn’t let go of his shirt. “Those poems are disgusting, I’m burning them. You better forget them too.” Ichimatsu threatens with a sneer and a dangerous glint of fury in his eyes.
The older clearly doesn’t understand why the angry and prone to threat Ichimatsu from their NEET days is suddenly back, but a strange part of him is almost relieved that he is. “W-why? They were important to you at some point and… they… they’re important to me. I read them when I missed you and hoped I’d find out you became a famous poet! Then I would have books and books of your beautiful and touching art.”
The compliment, surprisingly, calms the younger of the two down a little. Ichimatsu keeps shaking his head. “All but my cat poems are disgusting. Those ones you just read? They’re about incest.” He finally admit, a mix between hurt and disgust on his face. That’s why he had willingly forgotten them. He was such an idiot at the time, trying to tell people about his depression, about his self-harm, about his incestuous love... as if anyone could catch onto those secrets he kept perfectly sealed inside. As if anyone could help him.
Karamatsu looks back down at the paper and that’s when he notices: blue. He always read it as sadness and never thought of reading it literally. Ichimatsu is… or rather was in love with him? All he can do is hug the page as his eyes fill with tears. Maybe, at the time, he could have reacted badly to a declaration like that, but now he just feels sad. He remembers Ichimatsu being revolted at becoming an omega, he remembers him struggling to make friends, he remembers him being bullied, adding on top of that mental illness and a crush on his brother, it makes him want to go back in time and give that Ichimatsu a big hug.
Pieces of the Ichimatsu mystery are starting to fall into place for the older: it looks like his little brother hasn’t been well on the inside for a long, long time. That would explain his cynicism. “Ichimatsu is… is that why you started hating me? Because of how you felt?”
The younger grumbles, as he had hoped he’d never have to explain that one to anyone, especially not to Karamatsu, but he owes it to him. “I… I never hated you, dumbass. I was trying to get some space. Being around you hurt.”
Karamatsu smooths over the clearfile as it’s handed back to him, thinking he’ll have to read those poems again now. They are a collection of tidbits about Ichimatsu. He puts it away and smiles, biting his tongue not to say something stupid like I missed my chance . Why would he say that after all? A confused teen falling for his caring and protective brother is one thing. A grown adult is another. He offers his younger brother a hug however and it lasts a while, Ichimatsu tucking his head in the crook of his brother's neck. Karamatsu gladly drinks every second of it.
“I’m going to bed.” Ichimatsu announces as he gets out of the older’s arms, dragging his feet to the bedroom. He looks tired and sad, Karamatsu notes.
Chapter 5: Make a Sin
Things are getting spicy despite Ichimatsu's crippling anxiety as Karamatsu eats two breakfast this morning.
(Tags and rating have been updated)
“Morning, weirdo.” Ichimatsu mumbles under his breath, curled into a ball and face resting in the crook of his older brother’s neck. This reminds Karamatsu of when they lived together and how, when his little brother would feel too anxious, he’d just need to stand close or hug him and focus on being confident to help the omega calm down with the help of his beta pheromones. He wonders if he’ll still be able to work his magic to make Ichimatsu feel safe. Because of that kind of power and the natural trust omegas have towards him, the older has learn to actually love being a beta rather than to envy the masculinity and machismo of alphas.
“Good morning my dear little brother. What may we eat this fine morning?” The older wraps his arms around his brother and pulls him even closer against his chest while depositing a kiss on his temple. It has been so cozy to wake up like this in the morning: having company and responsibilities makes him feel like he has fully become an adult now. It’s strangely gratifying.
Ichimatsu lets out an amused snort at the affection and he lift his head with a mocking smirk and messier than usual hair. “You have to let me go if you want breakfast, dumbass.”
“But this morning is so perfect.” A shiver runs down the younger’s spine as he catches his brother’s eyes. The look he is given is undeniable. Really, Ichimatsu had expected his brother to want as little to do with him as possible after last night, not to be given bedroom eyes the next morning.
Ichimatsu feels fingers tangle with his hair to guide his head down towards Karamastu’s until their foreheads come into contact and though he doesn’t resist, his condescending expression doesn’t fade. “You don’t want to make that mistake.”
The line seems to plant a seed of doubt into Karamatsu as his expression falters, but he quickly rejects it to press their lips together. He meets no resistance: in fact, as soon as he starts moving his lips, Ichimatsu joins him and lets himself be rolled on his back. When they break their kiss, he is completely limp and his lips form a little reddened pout lathered in saliva. “That looks like the opposite of a mistake.” Karamatsu smirks, only to have his face pushed away by an annoyed omega.
“Alright, get off, I need to make breakfast.” The younger growls without moving an inch. His brother can’t help but find his empty grumbling adorable.
After Ichimatsu went to bed yesterday, Karamatsu couldn’t help but think about the past week where he found himself feeling strongly about his brother. It was different from before: when they were younger, he truly wished nothing but to protect his little brother. But now… now he’s actually longing for his presence and acknowledging it with the belated confession he received, he decided to sleep on it and that if he wakes to Ichimatsu and that they both feel the same way, they might as well live those feelings. They are two lonely souls lost in their own ways, so why not be lost together rather than on their own?
“I have my breakfast right here.” Karamatsu tries to sound confident, but the blush on his face and his darting eyes show his embarrassment at what he just said. Still, he pushes off the covers before going for Ichimatsu’s earlobe and neck, caressing his cheek with one thumb while his other hand slowly trails down the omega’s curvy body before settling between his thighs and rubbing at his pussy through the pajamas.
His affection is met with a hiss, but the older makes the mistake of not backing off and gets weak but rapid punches pummeling his head. “GET OFF GET OFF GET OFF!!!” Hearing the panic in his little brother’s voice makes Karamatsu’s stomach drop like a ball of steel. As soon as he backs off, Ichimatsu’s hand violently makes contact with his face in a slap that leaves four long scratch marks behind. He sits up to hold his throbbing face and feels his little brother get off the bed before hearing him running out of the room.
Once he has his bearings back, Karamatsu gets up from the bed, still confused, worried and not unhurt as well. As he gets out, he finds his brother curled up under the kotatsu, nails digging in his scalp and breath uneven. “I’m really sorry, bruzzah, I didn’t mean to upset you. I truly only wished to ravish you.” He hears a hiccup and smells panic, fear and sorrow, which makes his own throat tightens, heart pinching for his sweet little brother.
“Would you like me to make breakfast?” The older gently offers, only to be immediately answered by a glare.
A quaking Ichimatsu gets out from under the table and quickly wipes his eyes and his nose with his sleeve. “I’ll make it!” He growls, aggressively brushing past his brother.
“Leave me alone.”
Not being dense enough to be unable to read -or smell- the atmosphere, Karamatsu turns on his heels to go take a shower. He can’t help but feel like he’s once against messed up because of something he doesn’t understand. Ichimatsu was all into kissing, and even the caresses… maybe he was just too forward and pushed the shy kitten far too quickly, so it made sense it bit him.
Ichimatsu feels torn apart as his heart, his brain and his hormones all fight for something different. He needs to focus on breakfast, to think about something else than what just transpired. He finally got what he has been longing for a little more than a decade and as soon as it gets a little saucy, he gets a full blown panic attack. Great. “Useless piece of shit.” He mumbles under his breath as he shakily breaks some eggs and whisks them with some milk.
Still in love with his big brother, his heart wants nothing but to be together, for their life to remain entangled in love an tranquility, but his hormones are pushing him to desire a partner, someone to help him raise the child he keep doing his best to tell himself he doesn't want to keep. Meanwhile, his brain is taunting him as always, telling his this won't last, that he's not good enough and that Karamatsu can't really love him back the same way he loves him.
It was so much so fast: it’s only been a week since he has been living with his older brother, and despite feeling safe, he still has trouble settling in and feeling at home as his pessimistic side keeps nagging him that this won’t last. Karamatsu will realise he can do better and like everyone else will throw him away like a broken toy. He chops some vegetables as well as some ham, cutting his fingers a few times, but he doesn’t really care as the suffering inside his much more painful than measly cuts.
He drops the mix in the pan and wipes his cheeks once again. “Stupid hormones.” Feeling his mother’s anxiety, the baby wakes and he can feel him fidget. Putting his back against the wall, Ichimatsu takes deep breaths, eyes closed while listening to the simmering pan and the noise of the flowing shower while slowly rubbing circles on his stomach. “Shhh shh, it’s okay, I’m just an idiot.” after a few minutes, they both have mostly settled down, just in time for the first omelette to be done too. By the time Karamatsu is coming out of the bathroom, Ichimatsu has prepared two omelettes and sausages with half a grapefruit each.
Just as he heads to the bedroom to eat alone, a hand takes hold of his arm to stop him. “Non non, Ichimatsu. There’s no need to hide. I’ll respect your space, I promise.” Ichimatsu keeps his head low but nods slightly before sitting at the kotatsu to eat together. An uncomfortable silence lingers between them until their plates are almost empty before Karamatsu finally gathers the courage to say something.
“I’m sorry I went too far.”
Ichimatsu winces at the apology: he really upset his big brother with his shamefully embarrassing reaction. He truly doesn’t want to have to explain how fragile and dumb he is, but he doesn’t think he’ll be left alone until he doesn. “It’s fine. It’s not you.” The younger mumbles with a deep sigh.
“I just don’t want to repeat that mista-”
“It’s not you I said!” Ichimatsu hisses behind clenched teeth.
“Then what is it?” Karamatsu insists in a firm voice, visibly doing his best to keep is composure for the sake of his little brother as his eyes have become glossy as well.
“I’m… I don’t… Fuck off!” Ichimatsu elects once again to bury his feeling, to ignore the fact that he’s grown scared of closeness and affection as he’s learned he is likely to lose it as soon as he gets used to it.
“Can we still get… closer?” The older hesitantly asks, clearly still afraid to overstep his boundaries.
“Tch, if you want to eat pussy that badly...” The omega grumbles, still acting like a tsundere as he always did despite his face taking a crimson shade at his own words.
This seems to be all the cue Karamatsu needs. Ichimatsu finds himself on his back without his pants on. Simply seeing his brother hiking his thighs up on his shoulders makes the blood rush to his pussy and he feels his vestigial dick parting the nest of his lips become erect and his mound starting to swell. “What a lovely sight.” The older comments with a warm smile, though as soon as he looks between his brother’s thighs again, he looks nervous and swallows hard enough for his partner to hear him.
It thankfully doesn’t take long for the omega to find his tiny erection wrapped in warmth and saliva. The sensation sends a shiver up his spine: he would never admit to it, but Karamatsu is his first partner to go down on him, making this just as new for him than for his virgin of a brother.
Then, Karamatsu begins sucking on the sensitive bundle of nerves and Ichimatsu can’t help a loud, surprised moan at the intensity of it. Vibrators might be amazing, but a real, wet and warm mouth and having someone else pleasuring you doesn’t compare. Sure, he had sex before, but this is the first time he could call it being pleasured. The loud, surprised moan that escape his lips seem to only encourage his partner.
“T-too much!” Ichimatsu manages to squeak as he is drowning in arousal: but it’s too intense in only in one place… he will never be able to cum like that.
“Oh! So sorry my love.” The older apologizes, his face crimson red as he deposits soft apology kisses on his lover’s pussy. Ichimatsu wants to die under how gentle that bastard is, but he’d never complain about it.
“A-ah!” A gasp escapes the younger and he feels fingers plunging between his lips to part them, now realizing how puffy and warm they have gotten. Something warm and soft slides in between them, aimlessly going up and down at first before actually digging in the folds, which sends electricity through his lower back and gets soft moans at of him. He can feel himself getting wetter and his hole gushing its juices as well.
Hearing Karamatsu slurp at him was so embarrassing he had to hide his face: how did this virgin asshole dare be this good when his previous partners barely knew in which hole they needed to stick their dick in? Then he feels his brother’s wet muscle make it’s way in prodding and licking at his entrance and arousal overrides embarrassment: his hands fly to his beloved’s hair, pushing him even deeper into his pussy than he already was. “Kara… f-fuck.”
Smothered in pussy, the older keeps doing his best while holding his breath, the pride in hearing Ichimatsu moan uncontrollably enough to encourage him to work even harder. One of his hand moves up so he may rub his lover’s bud with his thumb. With all this stimulation, it doesn’t take long for Ichimatsu to come, and much harder than he ever did before.
“K-Karamatsu! NNnhhhhh!” With a few thrusts against his lover’s face, Ichimatsu feels his cock squirt out a bit of seedless cum while his walls violently pump around his lover’s tongue, back arching under the indescribable pleasure that, for a moment, seems to be the only thing his existence is comprised of. The pleasurable intensity finally comes down, leaving the omega feeling fuzzy and tired, and just as great being eat out felt, now all his body want is to be able to cool down and recover.
Thankfully, Karamatsu gets the message as his face is pushed off. He licks his lips and wipes his nose and chin with a napkin before bending over his little brother who is lying on the floor like a limp doll to give him a gentle kiss. “I need to go before I’m late. Thank you for the meal, my delectable kitty.” He says with a smile, only to be answered with a groan.
“At least let me recover before you start spewing painful shit.” The older can’t help but laugh at the annoyed and sleepy expression he is given and kisses Ichimatsu’s forehead before hurrying to their bedroom to get dressed. Once he hurries to the door in his uniform, his little brother has just pulled his pants back on and is gathering the dirty dishes.
“Have a good day at work, pussy breath.”
“Have a lovely day too, honey!”
Chapter 6: The Second Rate Alpha
Someone discovers Ichimatsu hiding in Karamatsu's apartment and helps him out of his tormenting thoughts.
Ichimatsu is holding his head in his hands, back against the wall as fear and guilt once again take control of him. What did they just do? Why did he let Karamatsu touch his disgusting body? His mind keeps going back to everyone who abandoned him once they got their fun or got bored of the novelty of a male omega. History will repeat again, he knows it: because nothing good ever happens to him… at least never anything as good as someone actually loving him.
He is pulled out of his self-pity by a knock on the door and only has the time to look up that it slides open. “Hey Karamatsu! Don’t mind me I...” The two look at each other in silence, Ichimatsu’s eyes wide as he stares at the shitty eldest in shock, while said shitty eldest seems frozen in time.
“ICHIMACHAN!” The omega nearly has a heart attack at the shout but doesn’t have the time to react to it that he’s pulled in a tight hug against a sweater that hasn’t been washed in at least a week while the eldest nuzzles his hair, taking in deep whiffs since he hadn’t smelled his little brother in years. “Holy shit! Ichimachu holy shit it’s been so long! Onii-chan was so worried!” The younger pries himself out of the vice grip, annoyed to have his space invaded so suddenly, but a heavy ball of guilt drops in his chest when he sees Osomatsu’s tear streaked face.
“S-sorry...” He mumbles, eyes glued to the ground and shoulders slouched, only to be pulled into a gentler hug, which he returns this time. He takes a deep breath as well, because he also missed the only stupid alpha he could never hate. After all, he’s the one who abandoned his brothers, not the other way around. Even if he still believes that was the best option for all of them not to have to deal with him anymore.
Once he is let go of, it’s only to have his stomach grabbed by two hands, the eldest beaming at him as he gently squeezes and rubs it. “Another little Matsuno! Awww, Ichimachu, I always knew you’d make a good mama with how you treat your kitty friends.”
“What?! N-no I… It was an accident and I’m giving it away.” Osomatsu looks up at his little brother with an unconvinced expression: he knows his fragile heart too well to believe Ichimatsu would be able to actually give the child away, but he knows better than to call his little brother out on something like that.
The eldest opens his mouth again before the silence between them can become too heavy. “At least now I have a good excuse to give Fappymatsu why I didn’t do the shopping.” Ichimatsu pales at the statement: he’s not sure he’s ready to have another brother find out he’s back and about the state he’s in. Of course, Karamatsu is a guy that always tries to be kind and Osomatsu genuinely doesn’t judge him, but someone like Choromatsu? Him and Todomatsu are the one he’s most worried about meeting again. It seems like they have their life together and unlike the others, they have proven to be judgmental.
“Hey.” Osomatsu says softly, smiling at his little brother before giving him a kiss between his knitted brows to try and ease his anxiety. “Wanna watch tv and cuddle? I’m real starved on those thanks to living with Fappymatsu and with Totty being too busy with his boyfriend.” The oldest whines, though he smiles pretty wide once he’s given an accepting nod.
It’s a little otherworldly yet very comforting to be resting against his big brother’s pudge, watching television while his belly is rubbed slowly and only having to talk about what’s on the screen as if nothing changed in two years. It’s a nice break from his spiraling negative thoughts. The eldest had always been the second best at helping him distract himself from delving in too deep where his mind didn’t need to go.
Ichimatsu can’t help but notice is that the eldest’s unwashed smell is stronger than his alpha pheromones, which is a first for him. The younger assumes he must be on suppressants. It’s not something he’s going to complain about however: Osomatsu isn’t that great when it comes to self-control when it comes to groping, so it’s the most sensical conclusion he can come to. Stinky Osomatsu smell is better than alpha musk any day. “How long have you been hiding here?” The alpha asks in a teasing tone, only to receive a shrug. “A week. ”
“What were you coming here for anyways?” Ichimatsu asks bluntly during a commercial break. “Oh you know, stealing some food. I didn’t feel like going shopping, but I didn’t want Fappy to yell at me for not doing it, you know.” The younger sighs: seems like the shitty eldest has changed the least. In actually, he’s not angry it’s the case: it makes one less person to one up him. “I need to go too, so let’s just do it.” He grumbles, rolling on his side to be able to get up as his stomach keeps him from being able to bend much.
Osomatsu gives him a helping hand and pulls him up with ease: it’s always unfair how alphas are much stronger than everyone else without having to work for it. At least it’s useful. The eldest tussles his little brother’s hair before pulling him to the bathroom. “There you go wanting to be more responsible than your big bro! Guess we’ll have to wash.” He says with an amused sigh.
The nostalgia of washing together with someone else in a completely platonic way has Ichimatsu lost in a nostalgic trance that keeps him quiet the whole time: not like it’s very unusual for someone who spends most of his life in his head.
“Have you seen Jyushimatsu yet?” The question pulls the younger out of his thoughts and he slowly shakes his head.
“Just you and Shitty.” He mumbles before receiving a sigh as an answer.
“You should soon! The poor guy’s going to be so happy to see you again, Ichimachu!” A heavy ball of guilt falls in the younger’s stomach: he knows Jyushimatsu will be extremely happy to see him again, because he’s an amazingly good-hearted, but as always, Ichimatsu is afraid to disappoint. His younger brother already has a child of his own, what would he think of a parent wanting to abandon their own blood?
“Earth to Ichimacchan? Time to dry your hair and dress up! I swear, what would you do without your oniichan looking after you?” The eldest says with a cocky smile. This grant him a glare and a pretend punch on the head.
“Tch! Dumbass, like you aren’t the hopeless one.” Osomatsu only giggles at the snarky reply with an expression saying he just finds it adorable. Ichimatsu slips on some baggy clothes and quickly towels his hair mostly dry before heading out with a bundle of reusable bags under his arm.
Ichimatsu takes in another long breath as he leans on the shopping cart: he’s starting to feel it when he has to stand up for a long time as his stomach is fairly heavy. He doesn’t say a word of complaint: he hates complaining and no one listens to him anyways.
“Let’s go have a snack.” The eldest, thankfully always observant despite acting like a clueless moron, suggests as he puts a hand on his little brother’s back to guide him to the food court in the grocery store. The younger doesn’t complain as he really does need a rest and takes a seat with a yawn as he’s promised a treat, resting his chin on his arms and closing his eyes just for a second.
“...useless lazy omega.” Ichimatsu’s face scrunches as he hears the insult from the cut of a conversation and he knows they’re talking about him. “I bet it’s a illegitimate child too. Those don’t know how to close their legs.” He buries his face in his arms as he feels his face turn crimson out of shame. Honestly, what strangers think of him isn’t that important, but it still stings when he can hear their venomous comments. Especially when they’re talking just loud enough for him to hear them from a couple of tables over. His fists are balling up as his blood is boiling, but the embarrassment and social anxiety the comments are making him feel are enough to keep him from reacting. “Responsible parents would have married him off because they would have known he’d shame the family name. But you know how it is these days.”
“Hey, wake up Ichimachu! I got a surprise for you!” The eldest announces while gently petting his brother’s hair. Ichimatsu halfheartedly lifts his head but can’t help the very faint smile on his face as he sees the cat face on his sweet bun and a cat also drawn on his paper tea cup. “The cute barista thought it was adorable how much you like cat and how much of a good brother I am! I got her number!” The eldest snickers while rubbing his nose with the cockiest of expression on his face.
“Tch, you’re shameless.” Ichimatsu replies with an amused smirk, admiring the piped cat face on his bun before taking a bite. It’s easy to forget the kind people when vile comments cut him deep with so much ease.
“Is it that surprising?” Osomatsu snickers before taking his seat to eat his own snack. He looks over at the group of gossiping older women who have been staring at them in silence ever since the eldest came back and he offers them a big grin that gets them to finally turn around to mind their own business.
“We need to buy a cake by the way. We’re doing our weekly meetup tomorrow and we need to celebrate our Ichimacchan being back with us and being sextuplets again!”
“Wait what!?” Ichimatsu looks pales and his eyes are wide as he squeaks out the question. He wasn’t ready to meet everyone yet!
“Shittymatsu didn’t tell you about that? We meet up every Friday night to someone’s place and then go get drinks. Don’t worry about it too much Ichimacchan, I know everyone will be excited to see you again.”
The younger nods and gulps heavily as he stares at his half-eaten cat. Deep down, he knows that, but it’s still incredibly scary. His age-old fear of disappointing, of not being enough for anyone, has never let go of him and now that he’s going to see his brothers again after such a long time, it shakes him to his core. Because they are his brothers, and he’s scared that even if they act happy to see him, that they’ll turn around and gossip like those older ladies sitting a small distance from them.
“Hey.” The word gently pulls him out of his downward spiral and he looks up at his older brother in anticipation. “If you’re not going to eat your bun, at least give it to me.”
The younger growl, the irritation caused by his brother’s greed making him forget his anxiety. “Fuck you Shitty eldest, that’s my cat.” The eldest snickers, his distraction having worked once again. His little brother is so cute and easy to read.
Chapter 7: Scared Kitty
A much needed talk.
“Good evening my most beautiful! Ah, what a lovely aroma! What is my kitten cooking tonight?” Karamatsu almost shouts as he enters the apartment back from work, prancing over to his little brother with the biggest smile before delicately tucking a rose behind his ear and puckering up for a kiss with a hand on his beloved’s waist. But all he receives is a glare.
“Fish over veggies.” Ichimatsu replies dryly before looking back at his cooking. The clueless beta gives him a nervous smile, confused as to what he did wrong. He still kisses his little brother on the cheek and rubs his side. “Alright, I’ll go make myself ready then.”
And with that he hurries himself to the bathroom to shower himself. He comes back to the kitchen-livingroom to find Ichimatsu sitting at the kotatsu with their meal, still shooting glares at him. The older sits down and thanks his little brother for the meal. They eat in silence for a moment before Karamatsu finally decides to speak up.
“I… maybe it’s not the best time to bring something up but I need to tell you something before it’s too late.” Karamatsu explains with an apologetic smile.
“Oh, really? What might that be?” Ichimatsu’s angry reply has his brother nervous but it’s not like he can turn back now.
“Hum, well all the brothers, we usually gather on Friday night, which happens to be tomorrow night. And it’s here this time.” Ichimatsu growls at the announcement.
“Wow, thanks for finally telling me! Also, thanks for telling me that the Shitty eldest likes to waltz in here uninvited! He saw I was here!” The omega’s fists are balled and his teeth clenched. Yeah, the time he had with Osomatsu was nice but… well he didn’t want to be found out by anyone and the events of the day reminded him why when they were at the food court.
Karamatsu can see the sweat gathering on his little brother’s forehead as he keeps growing anxious.
“I didn’t realize you meant to hide, Ichimatsu.” He replies honestly.
“Why would I want anyone to see me in a state like that?!” The younger growls, though this time his voice is audibly shaking. Karamatsu’s expression softens at that, finally catching on that his little brother's problem is towards his pregnancy and feeling a little stupid he didn't understand that sooner.
“Ichimatsu can I… can I ask you how you got pregnant?” He asks as gently as possible.
“I told you it was an accident!”
The younger tries to ball up but it’s pretty much impossible to do with his stomach and opts to cross his arms over the table and hide half of his face behind them, averting his gaze from his older brother.
“Fine. It was… he was… I had a one-night stand with an alpha bastard and… and he pierced the condom on purpose. You’re happy?! I’m a slut! I don’t even know his name...” He snickers to himself, but there is no joy to it and is even a little choked up. Karamatsu can only stare at him in disbelief, disgusted someone could do something like this to anyone and especially to his sweet little Ichimatsu.
“Tch, your little brother is disgusting garbage, isn’t he? Couldn’t afford the pill but I did it anyways. Then I didn’t even have the sense of aborting. Because it’s not the baby’s fault. Stupid. Stupid useless trash.”
Karamatsu shifts around the kotatsu to be next to his little brother, wrapping his arms around him gently. “What that man did to you is a horrible thing Ichimatsu, don’t blame yourself for it. All you wanted was to feel loved, didn’t you?” The younger is shocked by his older brother’s insight but he can’t comment about it as his throat closes and he makes himself as small as possible in his arms. Fat tears roll down his cheeks. He hates being an omega, needing others so much, needing to feel safe, to feel loved and wanted. At least he convinced himself it’s completely his nature’s fault and has nothing to do with being human and sensitive.
Can I feed you?
Can I pet you?
There’s no need to be wa-ry
I just think you are pretty
Can I warm you?
Can I hold you?
There’s no need to worry
When you are here with me
Can I keep you?
Can I love you?
By your side I am happy
I am yours my kitty”
While the lullaby had far from stopped his tears, the omega has at least relaxed in his brother’s hold. Karamatsu keeps humming quietly while petting Ichimatsu until most of his tears have subsided. “How was my syllable count, my kitten?” The older asks, sounding incredibly proud with his song and performance.
Not expecting the question at all, Ichimatsu violently snorts at the whiplash in atmosphere and lets out a laugh. “It’s good, you dumbass...” The omega replies while wiping the snot and tears from his face. While he clearly doesn’t understand what he did to make his little brother laugh, Karamatsu smiles dumbly, just happy he was able to make him feel better.
“I’m happy.” He places a tender kiss between his lover’s eyebrows. “You don’t have to worry my little Ichimatsu. I promise no one will give you grief if you attend. Our brothers will just be ecstatic to see you again.” While Ichimatsu is completely unconvinced by the last statement, his initial anger has subsided enough that he just lets out a deep sigh.
“I just wish I could have seen Jyushimatsu first.” Ichimatsu admits while mindlessly playing with one of the buttons of Karamatsu’s shirt. Now that his anger has dissipated, he has concluded that waiting to see his brothers won’t make things any easier. It’s not like he can hide from everyone for three months, especially when a loud mouth with little-to-no-filter like Osomatsu knows of his presence.
“It’s not too late for that, honey. He and Homura are fairly fond of surprises. We can drop by after dinner if you’d like.” Ichimatsu makes a little nod at the suggestion and tenderly presses his lips against Karamatsu’s into a soft kiss before returning to his plate. “Sounds good.” The other appears shocked that Ichimatsu is the first to initiate a kiss for once but he is quick to smile proudly at his kitten.
Chapter 8: Can I Keep You?
A meeting with a happy family.
“You didn’t tell me you have a bike!” Karamatsu puffs out his chest as he shows off his machine and patting it as if it were a horse.
“Heh, she is my beautiful cougar. She may be second hand, but at least she has experience.” Ichimatsu grimaced at that but was quick to change the subject.
“Isn’t it too cold to ride?”
“Don’t worry my little Ichimatsu: the snow has melted and the road is dry. That’s all we need.” Karamatsu assures before putting a helmet on his brother’s head. “I’ll drive safely for my two darlings, I promise.” The younger groans at his brother’s painful words but still joins him on the bike, wrapping his arms tight around his torso.
As they make their way to their brother’s home, Ichimatsu can’t help but find the ride feels like an eerie déjà vu. He daydreamed of this, had fantasies where his feelings were returned and where they eloped on a motorcycle they built or stole. Sometimes he would be the driver, but other times he would be like this, holding onto Karamatsu to escape somewhere that would allow them to love each other.
What feels strange is that they aren’t running away right now. They’re just going to see Jyushimatsu and his family. The omega’s heart pinches as he wonders if that will end up changing eventually, if they will indeed need to go hide.
“Are you doing okay back there, my honey?” Ichimatsu manages to hear his brother over the motor and he nods. Under the helmets, no one knows they are related and that makes little butterflies Ichimatsu had presumed to be long dead dance in his stomach. They probably look like a couple. He smiles to himself as the thought warms him to the core.
“We’re here.” The older announces, stopping the machine smoothly before stepping off to help his brother down. “Keep the helmet.” Karamatsu whispers with a wink after removing his own. Ichimatsu nods and makes a toothy smirk under his own. What a fun way of keeping the surprise!
They climb a flight of stairs before ending up at their apartment. Ichimatsu smiles to himself as he looks around, happy to see that even if their home seems to be on the small side, it looks like they are in a safe and family-oriented neighborhood.
It only takes a moment for the door to open slowly on a still smiling but sleep deprived Jyushimatsu. It looks like he skipped a couple shavings and has baby food sprayed all over his face and shirt. However, he perks up once he realizes it’s his older brother at the door. “Niisan!!!” He hugs Karamatsu before tilting his head at the mysterious person wearing a biker helmet.
“I have a surprise visitor for you my little burazzah! May we come in?” Still looking intrigued, the youngest nods and steps aside. Inside, the apartment is clean despite having baby products scattered everywhere. Some water splashing can be heard in the distance. “Did you need Homura to be here to? She’s giving Nikko a bath right now.”
That’s when Ichimatsu decides to remove the helmet. “Nah, I think you’ll need a momen-” “NIISAN!!!” The helmet falls to the ground as Jyushimatsu jumps on his brother, hugging his chest so tight the older can barely breathe. He doesn’t complain as Jyushimatsu is sobbing pretty heavily: at least he’s not wailing, then he’d feel bad. As soon as he is given a little bit of freedom, Ichimatsu hugs his little brother back, tears staining his cheeks as well and burying his face in the younger’s neck.
Sure, he was in love with Karamatsu and missed him, but Jyushimatsu? He was always the one that knew how to make him feel like more than nothing, the one that allowed him to be himself without restraint and judgement and the one that shone rays through his cloudy mind. If he’s honest, he’s not too certain he’d still be alive if it weren’t for him.
He is pushed out of the hug to have Jyushimatsu cup both of his cheeks in his hands, scrutinizing him as if to make sure he’s looking at the real deal. The poor guy’s eyes are red and his nose is running like a river. Ichimatsu uses his sleeve to wipe his brother’s nose. “Gross. You’re snotting, you goofball.” He says affectionately before being hugged again, this time to have his scent taken in.
Closing his eyes, he does the same. Jyushimatsu’s scent has changed a lot, new scents, presumably those of Homura and Nikko are now part of his, but he still has that strong smell that could almost make him pass for an alpha and that beloved smell of sand and sweat from playing baseball.
He is released once again, and this time Jyushimatsu finally notice his stomach.
He screams, falling on his ass with excitement. Homura quickly peeks out of the bathroom, looking worried and letting out a sigh as she sees the two visitors. “I was wondering what was going on. I shouldn’t be surprised. I’ll be here right away!” She announces with a giggle. Jyushimatsu had the time to get up in the meantime, now hugging Ichimatsu’s pregnant stomach.
“So many baby matsuno!” Jyushimatsu sighs with a smile. It’s not really surprising to see him this happy: he always loved children and was always good with them as well. But that’s always what worried Ichimatsu: would he think lowly of him for giving his child away? Ichimatsu wouldn’t blame him if he did.
“Sayako found this stray little kitten and brought him to safety of my home. He wanted to see you very badly, burazzah!” Karamatsu tells the youngest with a wink, making Ichimatsu turn red at the embarrassing announcement.
“Niisan!” Ichimatsu is only hugged tighter for this and he receives a big kiss on the stomach before his little brother looks up at him with the most heartfelt smile he’s ever seen. “We’re gonna look after you.” He promises while getting up without releasing his brother, carrying him to the closest couch with ease to sit him there and pat him on the head.
With that, Homura exists the bathroom with a baby wearing a yellow pajama onesie and a big pink bow on her head keeping her thin hair together. She greets the brothers with a smile before stopping dead in her track as he looks Ichimatsu over and lets out a gasp.
“Ichimatsu-kun?!” She gasps with a big smile. “I’m so glad I finally get to meet you! I’ve heard so much about you from Jyushimatsu!” She exclaims. Ever shy around strangers, the man keeps his eyes glued to the baby’s bow and smirks as he decides to try and be funny.
“My condolences.” He mumbles before being pleasantly surprised to hear her giggle a little.
“Oh don’t say that!” She teases back before bringing the baby closer to him. “And you get to meet your niece too! Say “hi” Nikko!”
Not without fear, Ichimatsu looks up at the baby and he can feel his heart sting as she smiles at him and squeaks a happy “Hoyo!” He smiles back as best he can and gives her a little wave.
“Hey there, I’m your uncle Ichimatsu.” He says gently before having her happily stretching her arms towards him.
“Yes, oji-san has a baby in his belly. Do you want to ask to see his belly?” Nikko stops flailing for a moment as she processes the question and nods before looking at her uncle with puppy dog eyes.
Ichimatsu nods weakly, feeling nervous about holding such a young child. Thankfully Homura sits her besides him but immediately she throws herself at his belly, giving him a hug. He gently rubs her back as his stomach becomes a knot at the affection.
“When are you due, niisan?” Ichimatsu feels the sweat beading on his neck, getting more nervous with every second.
“Three months...” He mumbles with his head low, dreading the questions that will follow.
“So soon niisan! Do you know if it’s a girl or a boy? Do you have ideas for names? Do… ah...” Jyushimatsu stops his excited questioning as he sees his brother tensing, his free hand balled so hard his knuckles are white.
“I… I don’t know if I’ll keep the baby.” A heavy silence falls on the room and Ichimasu braces himself for some berating, or to receive the cold shoulder. But instead, a callous hand gently pats his knee.
“It’s okay niisan.” Jyushimatsu starts, pausing until Ichimatsu finds the courage to look up at him. “We’ll be here for you no matter what you need, okay?” Ichimatsu nod, once again confused as to why anyone would want to help him or have to deal with him and his situation, but he has accepted to take those offers when he needs them.
“Thank you.” He whispers.
Thankfully, Karamatsu interrupts the conversation to praise himself for looking after their brother and to compliment Ichimatsu’s housekeeping skills. After that, the conversation drifts to childhood anecdotes until everyone but Karamatsu looks about to falls asleep in their seat.
Once they are home, Ichimatsu throws himself on the bed with a tired sigh, staring at the ceiling with a hand on his stomach. Karamatsu comes in his field of vision and caresses his hair. “Don’t worry my Ichimatsu. Make your decisions in your time.” The older leans forward and they share a soothing kiss.
Surprise! What's that? An early chapter and it's a long one!?
Wow, nine chapters already and we're not nearly done with this story! I want to take the time to thank everyone for reading my weird little au and I'm glad so many seem to enjoy it. The next chapter is the big one!
Chapter 9: My Home Against Your Skin
Ichimatsu needs help calming down and feeling safe in preparation for the day to come.
Eyes glued to the ceiling, Ichimatsu is unable to find sleep, and this time it wasn’t because of his child kicking up a storm. Karamatsu, who had been long asleep, stirs besides him and gently rubs his cheek with a knuckle. “You can’t fall asleep my love?” He asks, too sleepy to fake his voice or attitude.
Ichimatsu sighs, feeling his heart squeeze as he notices how genuine the affectionate nickname always sounds coming from his brother. He’s far from the first to use it, but he certainly is the first to sincerely mean it. “‘s nothing.” He mumbles as a lie, turning his back to Karamatsu to try and get him to go back to sleep.
Instead, the older wraps an arm around him and starts nuzzling and kissing the nape of his neck. “You know what’s great for stress?” He whispers, his kisses travelling up to his lover’s ear. Ichimatsu’s body wants to melt in the affection, but his mind once again nags at him that he is defiling his brother despite initiating none of this. Sliding his other arm underneath his little brother, Karamatsu pulls him close while is other hand slowly slides down to slip a couple of fingers under the waistband of his underwear and between slightly moist lips.
Ichimatsu makes a whines but no move to escape: if anything, he spreads his legs a little to let his big brother explore his body, allowing him to tentatively slide his fingers and prod here and there to find sensitive spots, pulling little gasps and moans out of Ichimatsu
“I thoughts you were still a virgin.” The younger teases after bucking into a particularly good stroke.
“I am.” Karamatsu replies softly, clearly concentrated. “I just know a few things… didn’t your other partners take care of you my love?” The omega can hear the concern in his brother’s voice and it’s killing him.
“They just went straight to business.” Ichimatsu snickers bitterly before melting again as his brother starts gently sucking on his neck while barely fingering his entrance, his free hand pulling his underwear off.
“What a waste. Don’t worry my Ichimatsu, I will make love to you like a gentleman, not like an animal.” The older promises, his warm breath rolling over Ichimatsu’s skin.
The younger sputters at that: honestly, like an animal doesn’t sound that bad. It’s like an inconsiderate jerk that isn’t fun.
Despite being painful, his big brother isn’t an asshole however and slides his now lubricated finger up to tease his omega’s cute little arousal, tearing more moans out of him. As he presses his back against his big brother’s torso, Ichimatsu can feel the other’s hardening cock against his ass and starts to slowly grind against it as he lets arousal take charge of his actions.
He smirks a little as he hears his big brother breathe out an “holy shit” from his lusty response. He grinds back and keeps masturbating his brother but doesn’t seem to know what else to do.
“H-here you virgin.” Ichimatsu mumbles between sharp breaths, taking his brother’s hands to bring them up to his nipples while he spreads his legs enough to let the quickly hardening erection slide between his thighs and against his pussy, letting it spring free from his brother’s pajamas pants with the help of two fingers pulling on the band. Karamatsu mindlessly bucks against him a few times while clumsily squeezing his breasts before stopping himself.
“Wait... not from the back.” He says, lifting himself to stand on all fours above his little brother. “It’d be a waste.” He adds in a whisper, kissing him tenderly as he sits on his knees. He pulls off his pants before looking fairly embarrassed.
“Oh, the baby...” He shyly comments while staring at his little brother’s large stomach. Ichimatsu raises a brow at him and snickers.
“You can go ahead: it won’t make a noise complaint.”
Karamatsu turns crimson at the comment and doesn’t make a move, still hesitant.
“But… isn’t it dangerous?” Ichimatsu rolls his eyes and lets out a groan at the question before hooking his legs around his brother to pull him closer, an excited shiver running up his spine as he feels the head of his cock against his wet pussy.
“That’s just your chance to go in raw, dumbass.” The Omega teases, nudging his older brother even closer until the man regains his bearings and nods: there is no chance of his little brother getting pregnant from him when he already is.
The older is very hesitant and careful at first, though it’s not just for Ichimatsu’s sake but his own as well. He never felt anything like this; warm, soft walls around him, knowing he’s making someone else feel good at the same time as himself and sharing a loving lustful look.
He averts his eyes because he feels he could cum from that much and Ichimatsu can’t help but let out a little chuckle. As soon as their eyes meet again however, his face flushes deep red. Karamatsu’s eyes are boring into him as he gently pushes himself in to the hilt and his excitement at every mewl he tears out of his little brother is just so embarrassing the younger throws his arms over his face to hide it.
“So... cute.” The older pants with a buck that gets Ichimatsu to let out a muffled moan. He peeks between his arms as he doesn’t feel his lover move anymore and is annoyed as he sees the guy is just patiently waiting for him.
“Here you are. Come on, let’s finally give you what you’ve been longing for, baby.” Ichimatsu rolls his eyes at the comments and decides to shut the older up by roughly pulling him down for a kiss.
Karamatsu’s slow and careful thrust don’t last long as he can’t resist the desire to pound into the warm, soft embrace around his dick. Ichimatsu has to turn his head to the side to breathe, overwhelmed by the feeling: his brother’s technique is… well he clearly has none. He has no rhythm, control or direction, but it’s him . It’s the guy that always made him feel good and safe, whom would never take advantage of him, make fun of him or think lowly of him. And that’s the thing that makes it so good he can’t help the noises escaping his throat with each trust.
“I love you… ha… Ichi… Ichimatsu… you’re so pretty… you sound so good… I love you...” Ichimatsu can’t help put whimper at the compliment pouring out of the second born’s mouth between the kisses he gives his neck and cheeks. He tries to fight them, to fight the urge to cry out what he’s wanted to cry out for over a decade, but everything is already on the surface and it all just comes out.
His fingers curl to dig into the flesh of his brother’s scalp and of his back as sounds between gasps and sobs rise from his throat. “Nii… nii...” He feels good, safe: he feels as if he can finally freely say it.
“I love you Karamatsu-niisan!” He cries out with a sob, though he doesn’t feel sad at all. It’s simply tear of relief that escape his body. He feels himself shiver from head to toe as he feels his lover’s seed pour inside of him after his declaration of love.
He doesn’t realize his eyes were screwed shut when he opens them as he feels drops hit his cheeks. His big brother is on all four over him, eyes glazed over from his orgasm and tears pouring out of them while he smiles like an idiot.
“I love you too.”
Ichimatsu observes him with a smirk, waiting for his arousal to subside: he may not have cum physically, but on an emotional level, he’s pretty much there.
“I know, you already said it, dummy.” He says with a yawn, eyelids becoming heavy. Karamatsu was right: he fucked the stress right out of him.
“Well, I cannot say it too many times.” The older declares with a very serious not as he leans down for a gentle kiss before returning to his previous big spoon position, pulling Ichimatsu close to his chest and nuzzling the soft hair on the back of his head. “I love you.”
One of his arms rests in the crook of his little brother’s neck while the other wraps around his waist, holding both Ichimatsu and his stomach in a comforting manner.
“You can go to sleep. I love you, I’ll always be there for you and everything will be alright.” The older softly whispers. Ichimatsu is convinced some more comforting words follow, but by the time they reach his ears, he is far into the realm of rest.
Next chapter will be the reunion, I promise!!! Sorry this one took so long: I'm slow at writing porn lol
The savory scent of pork udon has attracted sweet Ooji who is rubbing against Ichimatsu’s legs as he is cooking. However, it also attracted a vermin who unceremoniously unlocked the door, sliding inside the room with a mischievous grin.
“No. Out.” Ichimatsu orders without even looking from his pot as soon as he hears his brother taking a step inside.
“But Ichimacchaaaaan...” Osomatsu is pouting so hard it’s audible but his sad tone is far from effective on his little brother who simply ignores him. He closes the door and kneels by Ichimatsu’s side, hugging his leg to try and act cute.
“I’m so hungry Ichimacchan! I don’t know how to cook! Fappy doesn’t cook! I’m starving! You’re going to let your big brother go hungry? Your big brother who loves you so much?” He leaves a little silence so Ichimatsu can react, and while he doesn’t say anything, Osomatsu can see his expression pulling. “Ichimachu! So cold, I’m going to die unloved! OW!” The eldest overreacts at a plastic ladle hits him on the top of the head, Ichimatsu’s mouth twitching as he glares down at him.
“So annoying.” He growls, only to have Osomatsu step up his puppy dog eyes, making him roll his own with a sigh and immediately the eldest knows he has won and drops his act.
“Is Ichimacchan going to share his udon?”
“Just go set up the table.”
Ichimatsu won’t lie: he’s glad that his big brother is spending time with him today so he can keep himself from thinking about the evening. After all, the idiot never stops blabbering, especially when he starts telling Ichimatsu about everyone, and honestly Ichimatsu doesn’t mind since he missed out on a lot. And he doesn’t disappoint today either as lunch doesn’t have much when it comes to moments of silence.
“It’s going to be great for me when Fappy sees you! He’ll probably fuss less about me. You know how he is, minding the little things all the time.” Osomatsu says while trying to catch the last pieces of slippery noodles left in his bowl.
“Tch… he’ll probably just think I’m an irresponsible slut.”
The eldest stops fighting with his noodles to look up at his little brother with concern.
“Todomatsu too. Remember how he would always lecture me about suppressants and his ‘If I were an omega’ bullshit.” The fourth born snickers darkly.
“Ichi...” The door to the apartment swings open on a Karamatsu carrying a small bouquet in his hands, interrupting the conversation and the heavy atmosphere.
“Good afternoon, love of my lif- ghk!” Karamatsu is unable to finish his singing entrance as he chokes on his own spit after noticing Ichimatsu isn’t alone in the apartment, his face growing crimson and almost dropping the bouquet he is holding.
“Good afternoon to you too, boo. Don’t die on us, eh.” Osomatsu replies sarcastically with a smile as he watches his brother struggle to regain his composure. He snorts as he sees Ichimatsu hiding behind his hand, his face a deep crimson.
“Oh come on, don’t act like I don’t know, you two! I live downstairs from you, remember? My bedroom’s under yours? I kinda heard a lot...”
Ichimatsu only raises his other hand to better hide his face while Karamatsu stares at the eldest with his mouth hanging open.
“Hope you used the back door not to disturb the poor baby.”
“ANIKI!” Karamatsu scolds in horror, unable to get over how crude is brother is being.
Osomatsu guffaws at their expressions, holding his stomach. “Your faces are hilarious!” He comments, wiping his eyes and calming down as he notices he’s the only one that’s amused.
“C’mon, chill out. I won’t rat you guys out. Sheesh! I never did so far, why would I now? Have more faith in me.” He says, crossing his arms and pouting at his brothers.
“That’s one thing that’s hard to have.” Ichimatsu replies bluntly, to which Osomatsu fakes a deeply hurt expression. “And what do you mean by ‘never so far’?” Ichimatsu asks, clearly confused and suspicious.
“When we were NEETs, y’know, the good ol’ times?” Osomatsu says, his brows furrowing as he sees his brothers do not seem any less confused.
“OH! He means the misunderstanding when we switched clothes!” Karamatsu says with a nod as he turns to his little brother who winces at the memory.
“Is that a kink you tried out or...”
“Are you not uncomfortable talking about your brothers in such ways?” Karamatsu scolds, getting annoyed that his older brother is making the conversation impossible.
“You’re one to talk, considering you have no trouble doing your little brother that way.” He replies, wiggling his eyebrows, clearly amused that he can embarrass the two of them so easily. the omega shakes his head and sighs, getting up to bring Karamatsu his meal and clean the dishes as the two eldest keep arguing.
The more time passes, the more Ichimatsu is restless. He gets up every few minutes to go do something insignificant like making sure that the faucet is turned off properly or to pick up some dust from the ground, even going as far as ‘fixing’ his brothers’ hair a couple of times -and making them messier in the process, which annoyed Karamatsu greatly-.
Karamatsu has suggested they watch television to spare his hair do, holding his lover on his lap while Osomatsu lies on the youngest’s legs: the only way they managed to keep him still. Karamatsu is holding his hands, reassuringly brushing his knuckles with his thumbs. He didn’t end up relaxing, but it was thankfully still enough to get him to stop fidgeting.
Then finally, there’s a knock at the door.
Ichimatsu is quick to hide in the bedroom, anxiously listening to the voices coming from the entrance. He lets out a sigh as soon as he hears his little brother’s voice boom through the apartment.
“WHERE’S ICHIMATSU-NIISAN???” Ichimatsu only has the time to appear through the door frame that Jyushimatsu is already on him, hugging him tight.
“We saw each other last night.” The omega comments, hugging his little brother back with a sigh: Jyushimatsu’s hugs are things he missed dearly and that he won’t ever get sick of. They are always tight and firm, making one feel like he’ll never let you go.
That’s why he’s surprised when Jyushimatsu is the first to let him go, looking at him with an unusual calm and serious smile. “Ichimatsu-niisan. I have to tell you something very very important. Me and Homura-chan, we talked like night and if you want, okay, just if you want, we’ll adopt your baby. That way you would always know where your baby is and get to know them. But just if you wanna!” The youngests insists.
Ichimatsu stares at him in disbelief for a moment before shaking his head: of course Jyushimatsu would do something like that… in fact, Ichimatsu is pretty sure, without needing to ask, that he and Homura will end up with an army of little monsters in a few years.
“Thanks, Jyushimatsu. I’ll think about it.” He promises, smiling at the proud expression on his little brother’s face. He opens his mouth but closes it again and just gives Ichimatsu another hug: he probably didn’t want to upset him by saying something unnecessary. The older can only let out a small chuckle and hug bag, letting go as he feel his throat and the corner of his eyes tingles from thinking too much about how lucky Jyushimatsu makes him feel.
The four brothers are busy teasing Karamatsu about… being Karamatsu when another knock is heard. It’s delicate at first so only Ichimatsu hears it, freezing as his head snaps to look at the door. There is a second, sharper nock and Ichimatsu almost scampers like a frightened cat again before Jyushimatsu wraps an arm around his shoulder and beams down on him with a reassuring smile, rubbing their heads together to make him feel at ease.
Karamatsu opens the door on Todomatsu who is still looking down at his phone, fist raised and actually sending it forward and hitting Karamatsu in the mouth with his knuckles, only looking up once his hand comes into contact with it.
“Ew! Uh, I mean: Sorry, are you okay, Karamatsu-niisan?” He asks with little concern as he peeks in the apartment while wiping his hand on his brother’s shirt. His expression becomes blank once his eyes land on Ichimatsu, eyes running over his features again and again, eyebrows growing closer together as he inspects him.
“Hum...” He shifts uncomfortably before stepping forward, tilting his head to try and catch his avoidant brother’s eyes. “I-Ichimatsu-niisan?” He asks in disbelief, hand raising to his mouth as his eyes focus on his undeniable pregnancy. “Wow...”
There is a heavy silence between the two, the omega still refusing to look up at his little brother. “Typical, eh?” Ichimatsu finally manages, his voice shaking just like the hands he’s trying to still in his lap.
He doesn’t see the youngest shooting the others a questioning looking. However, he does hear an indignant sigh. “Really, Ichimatsu-niisan and Jyushimatsu-niisan are the ones that get to repro-”
“WHO WANTS TEA?!” Karamatsu asks, startling everyone into jumping a couple of inches from the floor as he slams the tray on the table, all shooting him a confused look for it as he sits by Ichimatsu. He rubs his beloved’s back in reassurance. He and Todomatsu exchange a significant look and a message Ichimatsu isn’t sure he understands is transmitted. Did... Karamatsu just prevent an horribly awkward conversation?
“Sorry for not telling you, Totty. We wanted to keep the surprise. The sextuplets are back!” Osomatsu announces as he pulls his little brother down by his side with an arm around his shoulders. The youngest nods, still looking stiff and awkward, pouring himself tea as he seems to mull something over.
“Are you… are you in a relationship, Ichimatsu-niisan?” He asks carefully over his cup, waiting for an answer before taking a sip. He lowers his eyes once he sees his older brother is sinking on himself. “I don’t mean… it’s okay if you aren’t, I just need to be filled in. It’s been two years after all.”
Ichimatsu gulps and finally looks up, only to be surprised by what he sees: why does Todomatsu look like he’s about to cry? What’s wrong with him? It’s now Ichimatsu’s turn to give him a shocked and confused look. Wasn’t Todomatsu always jealous of him? Weren’t they often quarrelling and picking on each other? Why was he being so emotional at having his shittiest brother back?
“Are you crying because I’m back or because there’s going to be another of me?” He asks with the sharpest smirk he can manage, loving that his natural dark aura can so easily be used as self-defense. And possibly to lighten the mood: which speaks volume about the present heaviness of it.
“Honestly! Niisan!” Todomatsu huffs, though it seems to release some tension in him as he wipes the corner of his eyes with his pinky. “You really haven’t changed, fake-darkness-normiematsu.” The youngest retorts, shaking his head slowly.
“Look who’s talking, heartlessmatsu.” Ichimatsu says, a smile curling on his lips as he sees everyone else is about to join in on the name calling.
“I’m here, sorry for the delay!” The door opens on Choromatsu who comes in, closes the door and removes his shoes without looking at anyone. “They keep me later and later and I can’t say no because I need that promotion since I have a leech stuck to my ass. A big, red, throbbing, useless, gambling...” He finally looks up as no one is interrupting his tirade and immediately meets eyes to eye with Ichimatsu.
“Uh… Ichi...” He blinks at his little brother a couple of times before immediately turning his fury back onto the eldest. “Why didn’t you tell me anything?!”
“Who’s telling you I knew anything?” Osomatsu asks with a big shit-eating grin curling on his face.
“Your face! Your face is screaming it!” He declares, pointing an accusatory finger at the eldest.
His eyes shift back to Ichimatsu who has now made himself as tiny as possible, practically hiding under the kotatsu.
“Sorry, Ichimatsu. I… I’m happy you’re here, safe and sound. That’s what counts.” Choromatsu declares with a nod and a kind smile. Ichimatsu sits back up but makes it a point to scoot closer to Jyushimatsu when the third born takes a seat by Karamatsu. He’s way too scary, especially since he’s still wearing his suit and his hair is still perfectly sleeked.
“So, where were you all this time? You know you got us all worried, right?” Choromatsu asks with a mix of concern and authority in his voice.
“Worried? About trash like me?”
“Ichimatsu, please. You know we care about you. And you’re an omega on top of things! We all know the amount of terrible things that could have happened to you...”
“Or that you could have done!” Jyushimatsu adds cheerily, trying to lighten and only realizing after speaking that his words could have a heavier connotation than implying that his brother is the criminal type. He lowers his eyes when he sees Todomatsu’s mouth pinch and his eyes becoming glossy again.
“Well, it is a you said, Choromatsu. Our dear little brother is back home, that is what matters and it is time to celebrate.” Karamatsu declares, placing a hand on his little brother’s shoulder as if to help him keep himself together, but Ichimatsu is already bursting at the seams.
“I did shitty jobs and slept around. An asshole pierced the condom on purpose and now I’m here because I’m an easy omega fag.” Ichimatsu declares, holding his breath and closing his eyes after the declaration as he braces for the disgusted reactions.
Instead, all he hears is a small “oh” and a sigh of relief while Jyushimatsu pulls him even closer.
“That’s… not very responsible, Ichimatsu, but I’m glad it’s not… anything worse. You’re lucky nothing worse happened.” The third born declares, his statement immediately followed by raspberries from the eldest.
“What, you’re going to preach abstinence now, Fappymatsu?”
“It’s just that if you can get pregnant, you shouldn’t sleep around. That’s begging for something to happen. And honestly, it’s best to preserve yourself.”
Ichimatsu can only observe his brother’s reaction: Jyushimatsu’s brows furrowing, Karamatsu crossing his arms over his chest, Todomatsu rolling his eyes with a “Not that again…” and Osomatsu making a mocking smirk and pointing and accusatory finger at his little brother.
“Kakuhidou! Fappy is a petty Kakuhidou!” The eldest mocks before giving the confused Ichimatsu a reassuring smile.
“I-I’m not...” Choromatsu becomes red, his fists balling. “You’re still a virgin too! So is Shittymatsu! Stop looking at me like that! You know I’m right!” The third born declare, his face turning even redder as he sees his immediate older brother turn red at his comment.
“Yeah, but we’re not petty about it.” Osomatsu retorts. “And I don’t pretend I can tell my little brother how to live his life. Holier-than-thou Fappybrian!” He’s clearly savoring the moment of being able to rub Choromatsu’s nose into something, not realizing he’s making Ichimatsu more anxious as the third born is growing angrier.
“What did he expect sleeping with alpha jerks? If someone were responsible, some things wouldn’t happen to him.”
“What did you just say about our little brother, Choromatsu ?” Karamatsu asks, eyes shining with a dangerous glint.
The three eldest look ready to murder each other as Jyushimatsu picks up his two favourite brothers and drags them out on the small balcony to let the eldest get at each other. As soon as the door shuts behind them, Ichimatsu hurries to the end of the small balcony and bends over the railing to throw up, making the Todomatsu squirm in disgust.
“You okay, niisan?” Jyushimatsu asks, rubbing the older’s back as he spits a few times to clear the disgusting taste from his mouth.
“‘m fine...” He replies as he lets out a sigh, sinking to the floor and taking deep breaths of the cool, relaxing air. It’s not the first time he’s heard people talk like that about omegas or about him, but it hits a lot harder coming from his own brother.
“Don’t listen to Fappymatsu, Ichimatsu-niisan. He’s… he’s become weird since he got his promotion. I think it’s because of his new coworkers.” Todomatsu explains, shaking his head, Jyushimatsu nodding wildly in agreement.
“Yeahyeahyeah!” He flops by Ichimatsu and wraps his arms around him. “He’s a big dummy.”
“We all punched him at least once for things he said.” Todomatsu sighs, sitting in front of Ichimatsu who avoids looking at him.
“It’s okay, he’s just saying what everyone is thinking...” Ichimatsu mumbles with a weak shrug.
“I don’t think that!” Todomatsu replies defensively, getting Ichimatsu to give him a shocked and confused look. “I’m friends with a lot of omegas, Ichimatsu-niisan. I heard about how it’s like, how alphas and even some betas treat you guys.”
Todomatsu then blushes slightly and looks like he’s constipated as he forces the next sentence out. “I… It made me worry a lot about you. Among… other things.”
“Awwwww! HUG!” Jyushimatsu orders more than declares as he pulls the youngest down into the hug, the two other awkwardly hugging each other into it, letting go once they hear a loud crash coming from inside.They quickly take a peek to see Choromatsu lying on the floor and holding onto his nose with Osomatsu looking his fist over.
“Are you guys done in here?” Todomatsu scolds as he stands over the third born who still looks dizzy. Jyushimatsu walks back inside but stops in the middle of the room once he sees Ichimatsu is still shamefully hiding behind the sliding door.
“I think someone is owed an apology.” Osomatsu declares as he sits Choromatsu up, the third born rubbing the back of his head, his swelling and bleeding nose now exposed.
“Why?” He groans, glaring at the first born for scolding him.
“For insinuating he asked for it.” Karamatsu replies, voice shaking with anger: Ichimatsu is certain the last time he heard him talk like that was when the eldest hit Jyushimatsu.
Ichimatsu can feel all the eyes on him and he makes himself even smaller. “It’s okay, I kinda did d-”
“It’s not okay, Ichimatsu! He didn’t even ask you how you were doing, or what happened to you before deciding you were to blame.” Karamatsu interrupts. “You don’t deserve to be treated this way.”
The third born looks like he’s ready to argue some more, but the more he looks at his little brother, the more he deflates. He finally sighs, his attitude shifting from self-righteous to embarrassed.
“I’m sorry, Ichimatsu. You deserve a better welcome than this.” He ends up admitting. “I’m not being a great brother right now.”
“Thank you! And now Choromatsu is going to pay the first round as an apology!” Osomatsu declares with a wide smirk.
“Yeah, that doesn’t seem like a very thoughtful apology.” Choromatsu retorts, crossing his arms and raising an eyebrow.
“Why not?” The eldest asks, completely clueless.
Kakuhidou are the equivalent of incels in Japan. And I promise I love Choromatsu! He just stupidly believes everyone’s blue-pilled right now.
Chapter 11: Karaoke Casanova
You've heard of gratuitous smut, and this is gratuitous fluff. There is no plot or character advancement in this chapter. You have been warned.
(Featuring: an Elvis song)
“KARAOKE!” Karamatsu shouts with his arms in the air, grinning wide. Osomatsu, Choromatsu and Ichimatsu are groaning while Jyushimatsu rushes towards him to give him a double high-five. Todomatsu is giggling, an evil glint in his eyes. They are walking in the humble karaoke venue, being too loud as always.
“Are you going to sing love songs again all night?” Osomatsu asks the second born with disgust.
“I make my selection based on the most beautiful songs, dear brother. It’s not my fault all of those are love songs.” Karamatsu replies with a proud smirk, winking at Ichimatsu at that, who only rolls his eyes as an answer.
“I’m gonna sing metal! Metal hustle!” Jyushimatsu claps happily. Ichimatsu nods in approval.
“You guys have no taste and they’re outdated to boot! I’ll show you what’s actually good music.” The youngest frowns as he browses through the top 40 list on his phone.
“Well, you can expect me to sing drunkard songs because I’m drinking to forget this.” Osomatsu declares in all seriousness as they head to their reserved room.
“Yeah, no. Not on my paycheck.” Choromatsu grimaces.
“Don’t worry Greedymatsu, I used some of it to win at pachinko last night.” The third born’s eyes become furious slits at that declarations and his hands slowly rise as he’s about to strangle his oldest brother.
“I can’t drink but you’re still paying my tab.” Ichimatsu flatly announces, which is enough to distract the third born who seems surprised at the boldness of his statement.
“Yes, you have to!” Jyushimatsu insists, which seems to convince Choromatsu well enough.
As soon as they sit down, Ichimatsu starts ordering on the touch screen: a large order of wings, a large Dr. Pepper, chips, chocolate… Choromatsu fidgets more and more with each item ordered, Ichimatsu finally moving aside after ordering his own personal feast. He might felt like shit with the way Choromatsu talked about him, but that only gave him opportunity for revenge… which he relishes. Todomatsu does seem to enjoy it as well since he laughs at the third born’s expression when he sees the total.
Everyone’s expression falls however once they notice that Karamatsu is already standing in front of the television with a microphone in hand, his hips swaying to the slow beat before he slowly turns, head hung low and eyes closed.
“Wise men say only fools rush in” He starts, opening his eyes and slowly walking to the door, dimming the light between the verses before putting his hand to his heart. “But I can’t help falling in lo~ve with you~”
Choromatsu sighs, crossing his arms over his chest. “Okay, who’s the victim this week?” He asks as Karamatsu slowly looks over the room, though Ichimatsu bets he’s only doing it to look like he’s hesitating before heading to him and kneeling in front of him.
As the next verse is about to start, he starts to lightly rub at Ichimatsu’s arm. “Shall I stay? Would it be a sin? If I can’t help” Their eyes meet and Ichimatsu feels his face heat up as his older brother gently squeezes his arm, the older’s eyes are soft and full of slightly sad tenderness. “falling in lo~ve with you~”
“WOOT!” Osomatsu shouts, earning himself a glare from the fourth born, which he replies to with a large shit-eating grin.
“Like a river flows surely to the sea” Karamatsu gets back up slowly but stays on the same spot, his eyes glued to his lover who is now hiding behind his hand. “Darling, so it goes~” He cups his little brother’s face, pushing his hand away in the process and runs his thumb on his cheek. “some things are meant to be~”
The older takes a step back and extends his arm to his brother, palm up. “Take my hand” Ichimatsu hesitantly gives his brother his hand as he continues “take my whole life too” The older dramatically declares while bringing their hands to his heart before leaning over Ichimatsu. “For I can’t help falling in lo~ve with you~” He declares before kissing Ichimatsu’s forehead tenderly.
“You know you don’t have to humor him...” Choromatsu comments, sounding like he’s taking pity of their servile omega brother. Karamatsu only gives him a small disapproving glare before sitting besides Ichimatsu to turn his back to the third born and wrap an arm around his beloved little brother. “Like a river flows surely to the sea, darling so it goes” Karamatsu continues, smiling wide as he sees Ichimatsu grown even redder when their eyes meet again. “some things are meant to be~”
Karamatsu takes his arm back to take hold of both of his little brother’s hands. “Take my hand, take my whole life too~” Ichimatsu swallows at the words and has to look away: his brother is completely sincere as he says them, the certainty in his eyes almost frightening. “For I can’t help falling in lo~ve with you~.” He declares before bringing their hands back to him and squeezing them. “For I can’t help falling in lo~ve with you~.” He makes a point of holding his note a little longer than Elvis does and the room falls silent for a moment.
“Jyushimatsu? Care to cool the atmosphere?” Osomatsu asks as soon as he notices Ichimatsu growing nervous and that his oblivious second in command not realizing it’s his fault. Thankfully, Jyushimatsu does diffuse any and all tension by jumping to his feet and picking a song.
“Genocide and Mass Murder by Deathgaze!” The second youngest announces as he snatches the microphone away from Karamatsu and cranks the volume up. The snacks and drinks arrive soon after he starts, giving Ichimatsu an excuse to shove the second born off and distract himself from his embarrassment with food.
Ichimatsu is letting out a sigh as they are stepping out of the karaoke venue, glad to feel the cool air of the night on his face again after such an eventful night. Jyushimatsu and Todomatsu caught a ride with Atsushi, while Ichimatsu walked away from the tree eldests until Karamatsu decided to leave Choromatsu to drag a drunk Osomatsu home.
The omega is watching his breath fogging in the cold air, neck sunk into his scarf as he’s doing his best to stay warm, but being tired isn’t doing much for it. An arm gently wraps around his waist and he turns his head to see Karamatsu observing him with a concerned smile. “Are you okay, love?”
“Tired.” Ichimatsu mumbles, which earns him a light chuckle from his brother.
“You did have an exhausting night, my sweet. Let me carry you on my back: it’s the least I can do for you after all.”
Ichimatsu groans and shakes his head. “No… moving feels good.” It truly does as his digestive system needs some serious help after all the junk he ate. Still, it feels nice to have someone fuss over him a little. Karamatsu gently hums some tunes as they keep walking, not even stopping as he unlocks the door to his apartment. He lets his lover in first and once he’s inside, hurries to help him take his coat and scarf off.
“Go sit down my love, I’m going to make you some hot chocolate to warm you up.” Ichimatsu obeys without hesitation, finding Ooji and curling around him, tucking his cold nose in the warm fur as he scratches the feline’s neck. When Karamatsu comes back with a steaming mug, Ichimatsu is helped up and sat at the kotatsu. He is about to complain when two solid hands start massaging his very tense back.
“Oh God, Karamatsu...” He sighs, letting himself fully rest on top of the Kotatsu. The massage continues, warm hands kneading his stress away. He never had one before and thought people exaggerated when they praised how amazing they feel. The older slowly works his way down and starts to kiss his little brother’s neck. “Trying to coax me into traumatising the shitty eldest again tonight?” The younger chuckles.
Karamatsu only hums as an answer, apparently very focused on his task at hand. He is now getting closer to the little of his brother’s back.
“You… don’t have to treat me like that.”
“I know. I want to. It’s the gentlemanly thing to do. This is what my dearest little Ichimatsu deserves.” Karamatsu gently replies, his voice low and loving. Ichimatsu is about to complain about trash being pampered too much when his lover’s hands move from the little of his back to the top of his thighs and not so secretly working their way in between them.
“Y-you don’t have to...”
“Please, love, stop saying that. I want to. If anything, it’s holding myself back from exhausting you with my tender touches that I find hard to do. I want to touch you, I want to hear you moan, I want to make you feel good and pretty and loved.”
“I… I don’t deserve it.” Ichimatsu sounds ashamed as he replies: who would want to be with him like that? Surely, his older brother is just too kind and acting on his guilt… isn’t he?
“Now that’s a nasty lie and you know it my kitten.” When did Karamatsu become so smooth and sensual?! Oh no: when did Ichimatsu start considering his painful behavior charming? He found himself spreading his legs as a hand snaked its way between them, a finger carefully searching through his pubes and folds to find his sensitive bundle of nerves. “There she is~” Ichimatsu lets out a moan and throws back his head, nearly hitting his brother in the process.
“What a sensitive little kitty...”
“For fuck’s sake...” Ichimatsu pants, annoyed at the saccharine little nicknames his lover is giving his pussy: he doesn’t have a problem having one, but he does feel it’s not really a nice one. In fact, there isn’t a part of himself that he doesn’t consider repulsive, which makes it confusing when someone -well, so far only Kramatsu- wants to pleasure him and he can only come to the conclusion of it being done out of pity.
“I-if you’re really holding yourself back, then l-let loose.” Ichimatsu smirks, thinking he finally caught his brother in his lies.
“Are you certain my love? I might overwhelm you...” The older asks with genuine concern.
“I knew it.” Ichimatsu huffs with a sad smirk as he pries himself out of his brother’s embrace and gets up, assuming that his brother’s answer is a copout. He takes a few steps before stopping in place as he realizes he doesn’t really have a corner of his own to hide in.
He doesn’t have the time to think about finding one that he’s swept off his feet. “HEY!” Scared of being dropped, he clings to his brother’s shirt and that’s when he catches the angry and determined expression on his face. What makes it even more surprising for him is that he is delicately laid down on the bed. Karamatsu joins him on it, placing his hands on each side of his head.
“I’ll make my passion undeniable to you.” Ichimatsu gulps as the fiery stare his brother is giving him and for a moment he almost smells like an alpha under his cologne and the omega can only stare back in shock.
“Ichimatsu. Since you confessed, my mind has finally allowed itself to be obsessed with you. Your happiness is a euphoric drug and the idea of being a new kind of family with you takes my breath away every time. You opened my eyes to the kind of love I have for you. It’s so wonderful! I feel like a fresh butterfly! I… oh love...” Ichimatsu is now hiding behind his hands, feeling way too aware at how warm his own face is.. “Your heart is so endearingly tender~” Karamatsu comments as he pushes one hand away to see the embarrassed expression on his lover.
“Shut up! Like anyone could ever feel that way about a trashy slut.” Ichimatsu growls with a sniffle, shutting the older up as he stares at his little brother in shock at such a reply. Then a look of realization dawns on him and his cockiness dissipates.
“Oh… love it’s… it’s not just my feelings you’re doubting, isn’t it?” He asks, his voice growing softer and sadder as he gently caresses the younger’s cheek. Ichimatsu can feel fear crawl under his skin at the possibility that Karamatsu is finally understanding the way he thinks and all he can do with the beta sitting on his thighs is to hide his face with his forearms in a weak attempt to hide his crumbling armor.
“You’re a lovable person, Ichimatsu. It’s so ridiculously easy to love you. Everyone who takes the time to know you does. Here, look at me.” The older gently pulls his little brother’s arms away from his face before leaning in to kiss him, only leaving a couple of inches between them once their lips part. “Let me tell you something horribly selfish, my love. The… the idea of raising a child with you makes my heart sing, such as the idea of giving you a safe and loving home, of coming back everyday to you and your cooking, to a child that sees me as their father. I couldn’t dream of anything better if I tried.”
Ichimatsu is just trying to concentrate on breathing at this point and Karamatsu pulls him into a warm hug, which he reciprocates. “But I’m ruining your dream of being famous...” The younger mumbles.
“Don’t be silly: I’ve never been more inspired than since you came to my home. And who said I can’t do both of my dreams?” Ichimatsu clicks his tongue at that but his hug becomes tighter, which tells Karamatsu his brother actually liked the answer. “Can I make sweet love to you, now?”
For that question, Karamatsu has the hug robbed from him before getting his ear pulled as punishment. “I’m way too exhausted for that, dumbass!” Ichimatsu replies as he stifles a yawn.
Karamatsu makes a disappointed pout as he rubs his barely painful ear. “Can I at least massage you to sleep?”
“Fine, you groper.” Ichimatsu replies while turning his head in his pillow to try to hide his amused smile.
Sorry for the long wait! My health has been a stain lately. Next chapter will be tomorrow to compensate. We will learn a bit more about Karamatsu.
Chapter 13: Big Brothers Talk
Osomatsu gets to his big brother duties
“It’s rare to see you out for a smoke.” Osomatsu cheekily comments as he walks up the metal stairs leading to the second floor apartments.
“It’s rare to see you up so early, Aniki.” Karamatsu replies with a smirk, detaching his eyes from the sunrise to glance at his only older brother who joins him in leaning against the railing, lighting his own cheaper brand.
“That’s because it’s rare that I need to have a serious talk with you, little bro.” Karamatsu’s brows furrow at the eldest’s words, making him wish the guy would have a hangover right now. “I think we’re due to talk about Ichimatsu. Especially before he is due.” Osomatsu smirks at his pun for a split second before being serious again. “What are you planning?”
“There’s no need for the second degree burazzah! I intend nothing but to care for him and his child!”
“Yeah, but why? From my understanding, it’s barely been a week since he landed in your lap. That dangerously sounds like an impulse decision. Especially considering you guys didn’t even set out to live together in the first place. I don’t know what happened between you two-”
“Aniki, Ichimatsu and I weren’t together before… before he came back to us.”
“Really? Huh… That makes it even more of an impulse decision then. Why are you even with him? I hope it’s not because you can’t get anyone else.” Karamatsu blushes at the accusation, anger waking in his stomach at the way the older is looking at him.
“N-no! I… I just… I may have awakened to… feelings I have been harboring towards him. Feeling I may have wanted to believe were purely protective and brotherly. When he confessed, it was a bit of a shock at first, but it also… it felt somewhat liberating and the idea of him being in love with me and me loving him back made me nothing but happy as well as the idea that… maybe… we could raise a baby together.”
“That’s still an impulse decision. At least talk to Jyushimatsu about it first since he knows what tikes and momma Omegas are like.”
“You don’t need to treat me like an alpha with malicious intentions, Aniki!”
“It’s not… if we weren’t talking about Ichimatsu and a child, I wouldn’t feel the need for this conversation. I’m just worried that you’re letting yourself be carried away by romantic and noble ideas. You’re a good man, Shittymatsu. But you’re still just a man.” The older sighs. “And Ichimatsu’s very vulnerable right now.”
“I know that.” Karamatsu growls, crossing his arms over his chest. “That’s why I want to be there for him! Everyone wants to be! I would think you’d have a higher esteem of your co-captain.”
“That’s not what I’m saying. I’m just saying that you have to be careful not to bite off more than you can chew. Everyone wants to help, but you’re probably going to end up becoming the captain of SS hormonal omega, so you’ll have to man it. I just mean to look out for my little brothers, you know that.”
“Oh burazzah, I’m already aboard that ship. I am braced for the rocky ride.” Osomatsu snickers in response and pats Karamatsu on the back while shaking his head.
“Keep Holding on tight!”
Ichimatsu is woken up by Karamatsu loudly singing some rock and roll in the shower. It’s not a rarity and is also an indicator that he is in a good mood. The younger puts on the closest bathrobe and lets Ooji climb on his shoulders before heading out to the kitchen for breakfast.
Ooji is served first while Ichimatsu is frying some eggs and steaming rice. Karamatsu walks out of the bathroom with nothing but a towel around his waist and playing air guitar, stopping once he’s close enough to Ichimatsu to gingerly cup his chin.
“Good morning my dearest. Who loves you?” Karamatsu asks with a wink, the question making Ichimatsu blush.
“Y-you love me.” Ichimatsu grumbles.
“That’s right! I do love you, my sweet.” The older affirms before kissing his lover on the forehead.
“I love you too, now go get some clothes on.” Karamatsu beams at the declaration of love and winks.
“Don’t say it like you don’t like what you see, baby.” Ichimatsu rolls his eyes as Karamatsu poses.
“You’re growing more painful by the day.” Karamatsu shakes his head and hums in disapproval at the reply before heading to the bedroom.
He comes back wearing a shockingly normal sweater and some baggy jeans, which makes the omega raise a brow. “I’m keeping my best outfit for tonight! It will be the first time my beloved will see me perform after all!” Karamatsu explains with a wink.
Ichimatsu frowns at the announcement, letting out a sigh. “I’m too tired for a smelly and noisy bar.” He grumbles while poking at the eggs in the pan.
“I’ll be happy, even if you just stay for a single song. I promise it won’t be too late and that you can go to the back room if you need to rest.”
“Fine.” Karamatsu beams at the reply, his eyes sparkling like an excited kid.
“Thank you! You won’t regret it, I promise!” The older exclaims before hugging his little brother. As he does, the younger’s round stomach presses against his own, reminding him of Ichimatsu’s state.
“How are you two doing?” He gently asks, bringing his hands up and rubbing at Ichimatsu’s very pregnant stomach. He gets another shrug as a response.
“Dunno… it’s moving a lot.”
“That sounds like a good thing.” Karamatsu comments, giving his brother an affectionate kiss on the forehead.
“Not for my sleep cycle it ain’t.” The older laughs at the answer as he heads to set the table.
That evening, Ichimatsu decided he might as well try to look nice, throwing on a jacket over a thick turtleneck and wearing a pair of stretchy jeans. They are minutes from leaving but he’s still sitting at the coffee table, mindlessly doodling as he waits for his older brother to come out of the bathroom.
“TADAH!” Karamatsu comes out of the bathroom, stretching his arms wide for Ichimatsu to better take his outfit in. And while Ichimatsu something expected something ridiculous, it’s not as bad as he thought it would be.
The older is sporting a navy pleather jacket with the collar covered in blue glitter, a golden necklace with a “K” as the pendant, fake ear piercings of the same color, a black tee-shirt with a large blue rose printed on the front, jeans with decorative patches covered in glitter, equally sparkly golden shoes -those Ichimatsu recognizes way too well- and finally, his hair is styled up with glitter spray. Ichimatsu can’t help but wonder if his brother is trying to blind everyone or dreams of being a human disco ball.
Still, it could be worse, considering that, glitter aside, his outfit is actually quite nice.
“What took you so long?” The younger grumbles, Karamatsu responding with a sigh of disappointment from not having his outfit appreciated.
“My makeup my dear Ichimatsu! I need to look my best under the lights!”
“What? It can’t be that: you maaaaybe have lipstick.” The younger squints, though when he is pulled by the arm to the bathroom, he quickly realized the argument was a huge mistake.
“Ah non non my dear Ichimatsu! You simply do not understand the magic of makeup!” The older explains as he pulls a massive bag from under the sink. Before he can pull out foundation out of his bag, Ichimatsu is out of the bathroom and opening the front door.
“Hey, do you want to be late or what?” He retorts, trying to sound mean but the slight shake in his voice betraying he is actually scared of the makeup disaster he knows will happen on his face if they don’t leave ASAP.
The bar is a lot nicer than Ichimatsu expected: it has a quaint and warm atmosphere with its dark wood panelling and the smokey scents coming from the kitchen. Karamatsu makes sure that his little brother is seated first before heading backstage. To the younger’s relief, he sees Osomatsu enter the bar as soon as he is abandoned. The older joins him with the biggest smile, wrapping an arm around his little brother before he’s even sat down.
“I see Karamatsu has dragged you out to his show!” Ichimatsu sighs, which makes the older laugh.
“Isn’t Choromatsu going to kill you for being here?” The younger replies as he leans against the table.
“He’s not allowed to! I’m doing my big brother duty of supporting my little brother on his way to his dream. Beer and snacks being involved is purely coincidental. You want something to drink?” Ichimatsu squints at his brother who gives him a blank stare. Ichimatsu looks down at his stomach, then back at Osomatsu who takes a couple more seconds. Then his eyes widen.
“OH YEAH!” He then blushes hard and hugs Ichimatsu tight. “Please forgive Onii-chan!”
“I’m not mad, I just think you’re stupid.” Ichimatsu replies with an eyeroll. The older smirks widely, seeming relieved. He’s quick to order a plate of hot wings and some drinks.
“Hey, dumb question but… was Karamatsu less painful before I came back.” Osomatsu pensively tilts his head before nodding.
“Yeah, now that you mention it, he’s acting more painful now that you’re back.” Ichimatsu groans at the reply and the older gives him a gentle tussle. “I don’t think it’s a bad thing. When you disappeared, Karamatsu became… he became a little stern. He didn’t smile as much and while he was serious and dedicated he lacked... something. He didn’t have that fire in his eyes. As if music was work for him.” Ichimatsu’s brows knit: did he really have that much impact on his painful brother? Did he really lose his passion because he wasn’t there? No, it must have been a coincidence.
The suddenly dimming light interrupt their conversation and the two turn their heads to the small stage illuminated by a spotlight. Karamatsu soon parts the curtains with a grand gesture before striding to the stool in the middle of the spotlight. Osomatsu “woots” and claps, Ichimatsu only joining him and the crowd in the later.
Karamatsu plugs in his guitar and gives it a couple of strums before looking up at the crowd, his smile warming up with confidence at the sight of his brothers.
“Good evening, Old Sake Lounge and thank you for welcoming me on this lovely Saturday to dellect your lovely tympans. Tonight, I will premiere with you a song close to my heart and the one I am most proud of to this. I dedicate it to my precious little brother. I call it ‘Wingless Angel’.” With that, Karamatsu steps to the edge of the stage and starts strumming a melancholy tune, his eyes rising to stare at Ichimatsu after the first verse:
“I want to be right for you
Be your rock and boey too
But I can’t pierce your gloom
My most tender bloom
Isn’t it a mean trick of destiny
For me to fail at your mystery
But baby I think I broke the code
It’s the reason for this ode
Baby, my sweet, my beautiful
I’m too rough for your tender soul
A rock scrapes your skin
A booey you yet can’t grip
You need not stone or rubber
I see it’s not to love you any less tender
To be your beacon or spring water
And only upon your request shall I carry you”
Karamatsu smiles tenderly and seems almost on the verge of tears as he gently finishes his song by slowing down the melody to a quiet still. It’s only when everyone starts clapping that Ichimatsu realizes how transfixed he has become and that tears are rolling down his cheeks. Of course, he claps as well, wiping his face between claps.
Osomatsu, of course, notices this and chuckles softly. “So painful! I can’t believe you’re falling for that, Ichimacchan. Awful tastes.”
“Shut up!” Ichimatsu elbows the eldest in the ribs for his remark, even if he is thankful for it since it helps his mood settle a little. Still, Karamatsu’s a lot more talented than he expected, so he decides he might as well stay the whole show, even as he’s announcing that his next song is going to be “Heart of a Glittering Tiger”.
I'm so sorry for the long wait! Hopefully I won't be this long to post the next chapter. I will however have weeks of me sitting on my butt doing nothing at home very soon, which means I'll have more than enough time to keep writing. They will also have Ichi hanging out with other characters, which will spice things up a little!
Chapter 15: Echography
There's some medical talk and mention of needles for those who are like Ichi and aren't fond of them.
Ichimatsu is nervously shifting in his seat in the waiting room, Homura giving him a reassuring smile as she sees him wringing his hands. Neither Karamatsu nor Jyushimatsu were free that day to accompany him to his first echography and Osomatsu was actually forced to go to interviews Choromatsu scheduled for him under threat of having the internet password changed on him… again. And thus Homura was the chosen one: after all, she had a few of them herself and Ichimatsu knew it would be less awkward to go for the exam with a friend rather than a brother, especially since she was a lot more normal than any of them could ever dream to be.
“Everything will be okay, Ichimatsu-kun. It doesn’t hurt. It feels cold, but it doesn’t hurt at all. It almost feels nice actually. And you’ll be able to see your little one for the first time.” She explains dreamily while bouncing Nikko on her knee. Ichimatsu’s fists become tighter at that. It’s honestly his second biggest problem in all this: what if he ends up wanting to keep his child after seeing them? He can’t do that to them, to any living being! Ichimatsu, a mother? that would only curse the poor child!
“Oh! And they won’t stick you with a needle or anything at all, promise! Jyushimatsu told me to make sure to mention that.” Homura adds, holding a hand over her mouth to cover her amusement as she sees a lot of tension leave her brother-in-law’s body.
“T-thank you.” He shyly mumbles.
“Oh, it’s nothing Ichimatsu-kun! I’m glad it’s making you feel better.”
“N-no for hum… c-coming e-even if we don’t k-know each other that much.” He explains while staring at the linoleum.
“Well, we’re family, aren’t we? That means we’re there for each other.” She says, her voice growing soft as she sees his head sink between his shoulders. He can’t help but feel guilty: he missed Jyushimatsu’s wedding and his first child, he missed Choromatsu getting a job, missed Todomatsu coming out and he missed Karamatsu’s first show, his first podcast and his first bouquet. What kind of brother is he? He wasn’t there for them. And yet, Homura is still this considerate to him, still here for him. “Jyushimatsu wanted to come as well but he thankfully had work. You know he yelled and clapped when we got Nikko? He made such a commotion he got kicked out of the hospital for it.” She says with a laugh.
Ichimatsu can only smile at that story: it does sound like his little brother. Seeing that story seemed to calm down Ichimatsu further, Homura keeps going. “After I gave birth, he would keep showing her to everyone and say I was the bravest person alive for pushing something that big out.”
“That’s also why I made Karamatsu babysit. Every time he came here to visit us, he would start flirting with the nurses or trying to sing lullabies to patients.” Homura laughs as she sees him roll his eyes.
“Thanks for sparing me.”
“No problem big bro!” She exclaims before tussling Ichi’s hair only to stop herself immediately as she seems to have surprised herself. “Oh, sorry, I didn’t mean to be so forward!”
“Matsuno Ichimatsu?” A nurse calls, making the two omegas lift their heads. They get up and follow her to the doctor’s office where they are sat together.
“Matsuno Ichimatsu, I’m Ishi-sensei, nice to meet you.” The woman greets with a small bow and a smile before turning to Homura. “And you are?”
“Matsuno Homura, his sister-in-law.” Homura says with a bow without further explanation: Ichimatsu isn’t angry for it: he’d find it embarrassing if it was explained how nervous he is.
“Matsuno-san, it is of my understanding that this is your first prenatal appointment?”
Ichimatsu weakly nods, feeling guilty about it: this is just proof of how horrible of a mother he is and would be.
“I’m glad you decided to make one in the end: we’ll be able to make sure you and your baby are as healthy and happy as possible.” The doctor kindly assures before looking down at Ichimatsu’s file. She soon proceeds to start asking him a battery of questions, which, from Homura’s reactions, seem to be standard procedure. Ichimatsu does his best to answer, but the anticipation of the echography keeps him out of them moment.
After being changed in a hospital gown and being weighed, he is made to sit in another, smaller waiting room before being called once again, this time being guided to an adjustable chair where he is made to lay before exposing his stomach, which makes him blush: that was another reason why he wasn’t too keen on the hospital: being touched and exposed willy-nilly.
“It’s going to be cold.” The nurse smiles apologetically before spreading an indeed cold gel on his stomach, which makes his shiver. The woman then turns the monitor on and Homura excitedly grabs his hand, a large grin on her face.
“We’re going to see you baby!” She squeals, making the nurse laugh.
“Do you have a name yet?” The nurse asks, holding the sound just over his stomach. Ichimatsu shakes his head.
“That’s okay.” She reassures. “Well then ,say hello to your mommy, mystery baby.” She says as she finally pushes the sound against Ichimatsu’s skin. She remains a little silent as she looks around, which doesn’t help Ichimatsu’s nervouness. He doesn’t dare say anything however, making him happy once again Homura is here again.
“So?” She asks, impatient.
“Sorry.” The nurses says with an apologetic smile. “It’s… not too much to worry about. Your little one is a little small for their age, but it should be okay.” She reassures before focusing on the echography again, smiling once she spots something and points at the screen.
“Look, it’s their little face. Awe, they are sucking their thumb, see?” The nurse explains while showing the baby’s features. Ichimatsu feels his throat tighten at the sight. The view of the fetus is very clear. He takes a shaky breath, feeling tears prick at his eyes. Will he really be able to give them away? Seeing them like that, seeming content in his stomach… maybe he could make them happy? He exhales, shaking his head to himself. No, he needs to decide something like that another time.
“Do you want to know your baby’s sexe?” The nurse asks expectantly, making Homura look at him with begging eyes. She has been so kind to him so far, even if he’s scared of knowing more about the baby. And she more than deserves it for offering to take them in if Ichimatsu decided to put them for adoption. He nods, which visibly pleases the two women.
“She’s a little girl! I’m very certain” The nurse happily declares and Ichimatsu can’t help but chuckle at the excited bound Homura makes when she hears the announcement, her happiness contagious.
They keep looking for a while as the nurse takes some pictures. Ichimatsu lets out a sigh of relief when he’s told he can pull the gown back down, despite the gel making it feel disgustingly sticky.
“I would recommend doing some doing some further examination. Examining your water would help us make sure you little one is healthy.” The nurse suggests, though seeing Homura’s expression, Ichimatsu feels a little nervous.
“How… do you do that?”
“Hum, well, we use the echography machine to see properly and make sure we don’t hurt your baby, then we use a special needle and take a sample.” Ichimatsu can feel the color drain from his face at the explanation.
“Th-through the stomach?” He squeaks nervously. The nurse nods.
“Yes, the needle is about this long and...” Ichimatsu doesn’t hear anything else she says as she is drowned by white noise while his world turns black. He’s only conscious long enough to be happy he’s already lying down.