Chapter Text
Kagome sucked in a breath before releasing it in a breathy sigh. Finally relaxing her form against Inuyasha, Kagome gave his hand a grateful squeeze as she tilted her head to rest on his shoulder. Inuyasha squeezed back and dropped a kiss to the top of her head.
“You already know some of it when we were explaining what happened to Mama and Gramps,” Kagome started, choosing her words carefully. “But I didn’t tell them…everything that happened in the barn.”
Inuyasha nodded, unsurprised.
“I didn’t really feel comfortable...ah...airing out your dirty laundry, as it were. Figured it’d be easier if I kept it on a ‘need to know’ basis so that I didn’t have to deal with awkward or personal questions.”
Inuyasha’s lips twitched and he pressed another kiss to her head in silent gratitude. He was glad she hadn’t told them everything honestly, because she was right. Some of it wasn’t really any of her family’s business and he appreciated that she had the foresight to understand that.
Kagome took another deep breath and braced herself. God, where did she even begin?
“Naraku was…unhinged,” she started, figuring it was as good a place to start as any. “The first thought I had when I saw him was that it wasn’t the Naraku I knew. Sure, I’d seen him get pissed plenty of times before, but this…this was on a whole other level. One minute he’s screaming at me to shut up, the next he’s demanding an answer to what I thought was a rhetorical question before threatening to kill me all in the space of a breath…I don’t think I’ve ever been more terrified in my entire life.”
Kagome paused briefly to collect her thoughts and closed her eyes, a slight frown knitting her brow before continuing.
“He went on about how he liked that side of me; quiet, obedient, and submissive.” Her frown deepened. “He always did seem to be in his best moods when I didn’t argue with him or offer any sort of opinion. God, I really was blind, wasn’t I?”
“No,” Inuyasha immediately interrupted, unable to stay quiet about that particular statement. “Naraku manipulated you, Kagome. He was mentally ill; you can’t blame yourself for falling for his schemes. Not only did he know what he was doing, he was also good at it. So don’t beat yourself up for reacting how anyone else in your shoes would’ve.”
Raising his free hand, clawed fingers brushed her cheek and tucked a tendril of raven silk behind her ear. Kagome lifted her eyes to his and tipped him a trembling, but genuine smile.
“Thank you,” she whispered, and he nodded, reluctantly letting his hand drop. “I think that’s what he was doing. Manipulating me, I mean, when he asked me to go back to him.”
Inuyasha’s eyebrows shot up in brief surprise before abruptly plummeting down to slant angrily over livid amber eyes and dark scowl pulled the corners of his mouth downwards, further twisted his features. This was something Kagome had obviously failed to mention previously while talking in his kitchen what felt like a lifetime ago. The anger boiled hot in his gut, bubbling up in the form of a lethal growl escaping past tightly clenched teeth. How dare that fucker have the audacity to ask her to go back to him?! After what he did to her?! After the fucking hell he put her through?! God, if that motherfucker wasn’t dead already—!
A small hand cupped his cheek and all homicidal thoughts came to a screeching halt. Golden eyes quickly flashed to rich caramel and Kagome smiled at him, soft, warm, understanding. Sighing as the rest of his ire abruptly drained out of him, Inuyasha turned his head and pressed a kiss to her palm before catching her hand with his and bringing it down to join the other two.
“Sorry,” he mumbled and Kagome wordlessly shook her head, reaching up to fondly tweak his ear before settling back against him.
Filled with a need that came out of nowhere, Inuyasha tugged her hand out of his grip so he could drape an arm around her shoulders while keeping her other hand trapped within his own. Kagome melted against him with a soft sigh and he waited for her to continue, allowing her scent to ground him, calming his turbulent mind.
“He tried to convince me that things would go back to normal if I went back to him,” Kagome continued and he was pleased to hear the slight note of incredulity in her voice. “He actually thought he was being generous and that I would believe him with a gun pointed at my face. I think that was when it finally started to sink in that he was truly mad.”
She shook her head and racked a hand through her hair, blowing out her cheeks in a tired sigh. Inuyasha squeezed her shoulders in silent encouragement and she flashed him a quick smile of gratitude.
“I remember I looked away for just a second and then he was back to screaming at me. It was…terrifying how quickly he could go from zero to sixty. So many times while I was trapped in there with him I thought he was going to lose it and just shoot me. He just looked so…so close to snapping, to losing his patience countless times. I thought for sure that even just a small move from me would be the trigger.”
Kagome’s breath hitched in her throat for a moment. “Half the time I was paralyzed with fear, while the other half I wanted to curl into a ball and weep. It was disconcerting, and I felt so…I don’t know…discombobulated? Detached? It—it’s hard to explain…”
“Then don’t,” Inuyasha rumbled. A quick glance revealed that his head was reclined back onto the couch behind them, eyes closed, and his brows dipped into a mild frown.
Kagome bit her lip and nodded even though he couldn’t see it. She hesitated before continuing, however, because she knew he wasn’t going to like what she said next. Hell, a month later and it still hurt to think about, let alone actually speak about it. But she supposed that was the whole meaning of this heart to heart, wasn’t it? To clear the air between them and to, hopefully, banish the doubts they both harbored toward one another so that maybe…maybe something more could develop between them.
Steeling herself, Kagome sucked in a breath, squeezed his hand, and said just loud enough for him to hear, “That was right before he said he knew you and that I…I was a…r-replacement.”
Inuyasha suddenly stiffened and Kagome ducked her head, hunching her shoulders.
“F…for Kik—”
“No.”
Kagome closed her eyes. “Inuyasha—”
“No, Kagome.”
Withdrawing both his arm and hand from her, Inuyasha’s features twisted into an irritated scowl as he thrust his hands through his short hair. The growl that leaked past tightly clenched teeth was an obvious tell of his quickly rising agitation.
“Don’t you dare believe that load of bullshit, you are not a fucking replacement,” he seethed and pinned her with a heated glare. “If you think for even a fucking second—”
“Let me finish,” Kagome cut him off sternly. Strangely, the gentle censure in her voice was enough to take the wind right out of his sails.
Grimacing, Inuyasha jerked his head in a curt nod and settled back down, though his posture was stiff and his shoulders tense as he glared straight ahead.
“I know you don’t want to hear it, but it’s not any easier for me to actually say it,” Kagome murmured and Inuyasha flinched. He supposed this was how she’d felt when he was talking about his relationship with Kikyou. He really had no right, did he?
“I didn’t believe it at first,” she went on and Inuyasha felt even more like an asshole. “By that point I’d realized what a sick, twisted liar he was and that he was only trying to hurt me. And besides…”
Kagome turned her head toward him and Inuyasha forced himself to meet her gaze. She smiled at him and though it was strained and weak, it had a small sliver of hope embedding in his heart.
“I knew you would never use me like that,” Kagome whispered, large eyes gazing directly into his own. He felt his breath hitch in his throat. “I knew you weren’t that kind of man, despite only knowing you for just a few days. So he had to be lying, right?”
Inuyasha’s expression softened. But before he could say anything, Kagome’s smile faded and she sighed before dropping her gaze to the floor. He tensed, instinctively knowing that whatever she was going to say next would be a kick to the gut.
“But then he showed me a picture of Kikyou and the doubts came rushing back.”
Ears flattening into his hair and face going stark white, Inuyasha winced hard and looked away from her. He squeezed his eyes shut tight as the guilt crashed into him like a freight train. Fuck, he was right, except the kick was aimed a little higher, the weight crushing his chest making it a little harder to breathe.
God, how the fuck was he going to explain that?
“And you know, the funny thing is,” Kagome started, her tone of voice suggesting it was anything but funny, “I had already seen a picture of her before that, but I’d completely forgotten about it.”
Inuyasha frowned at her and Kagome shrugged a little sheepishly.
“The night it happened I was gathering laundry in your room,” she confessed. “I sorta…nosed around on your dresser and found her picture lying face down.” She averted her gaze from his. “I’m sorry, I know I shouldn’t have, but I just…”
She trailed off, realizing she had no valid excuse. But it was just as well. With Inuyasha sitting beside her still as a statue and as stiff as one, she figured it’d be best if she didn’t provide one anyway.
“It never occurred to me then, as I was looking at your picture of her that you were using me.” Kagome chuckled nervously. “I mean yeah, I did notice how much we looked alike. It’s sort of impossible to miss, but even then I never thought myself to be some kind of replacement for her. So I simply shrugged it off, put it back, and forgot about it. Out of sight, out of mind, as they say.”
Inuyasha held his breath and balled his hands into tight fists, claws digging into his palms.
“But then suddenly I’m staring down at her face again and it…clicked. I hate that it was Naraku who put that idea in my head, and I hate even more that I…I started to believe him.”
Shrinking in on herself, hunching her shoulders and bowing her head with eyes squeezed shut, Kagome didn’t notice the pained expression on Inuyasha’s face as he gaped down at her. She didn’t see the way his ears wilted on his head, the hurt in those magnificent golden eyes of his, and she failed to see how he struggled to say something, anything, his mouth opening and closing but no words escaping.
“Kagome,” Inuyasha managed through a tight throat, shaking his head. “I—”
“Inuyasha.”
His jaw shut with an audible click and he grimaced. That one word, his name, had been a plea to just let her get this off her chest. Inuyasha nodded once before looking away, ears tight against his head and jaw clenched. He wanted so badly to reassure her, to beg her to let him explain. But he also respected her wish to let her finish uninterrupted. She’d given him the same courtesy, after all. It was only fair he did the same.
“I didn’t want to believe it,” Kagome continued after a short pause to regain her bearings, but her voice was small and raspy. “But it made sense. I kept thinking about all those times you quietly stared at me, saying nothing, and then the time you k-kissed me but pulled away...I thought it was because you realized it wasn’t her.”
Inuyasha bit his lip hard to stifle the growling whine that erupted in his throat at the anguish in her voice. He wanted so desperately to deny everything she was saying, but he forced himself to remain quiet. He dug his claws into his palms once more and appreciated the pain that helped ground him, helped him concentrate on something other than the growing need to abolish her doubts by pinning her down and showing her how bad he wanted her and no other.
“But then,” she said and the change in her voice had Inuyasha’s gaze cutting to her in cautious curiosity. “Then I looked at that bastard’s stupid face and he actually looked bored at my suffering and suddenly the pain changed to hot, boiling fury inside me.”
Kagome sat up a little straighter as her voice grew stronger and Inuyasha held his breath. She stared straight ahead, her eyes suspiciously bright and her cheeks a mite blotchy, but the thoughtful frown on her face was strangely encouraging.
“It was like something inside me just snapped. I remember thinking how dare he do this to me? How dare he feed me these lies, poison my mind with his manipulative ways, and have the audacity to put his filthy hands on me? I remember that the anger felt so good. It felt amazing to feel something other than pain, so I latched onto it and let it fuel me until my fighting spirit came rushing back.”
Kagome suddenly laughed and the sound was mocking, not humorous at all. Inuyasha flinched; coming from his sweet Kagome, it didn’t sound right at all.
“God, I was so stupid. I can’t believe I actually allowed that monster to crush and shape me into this whimpering little girl that did everything he demanded of me. I refused to give in this time, though. I was done being the scared little girl, done with being weak. Naraku had always hated it when I fought back or when I showed even the smallest amount of temper. Now I have to wonder: if I’d continued to fight with him back then, would I have had the same fate as Kikyou?”
Kagome tilted her head, a look of contemplation on her face.
“It’s likely,” she mused. “I mean he did say that the only reason he tolerated me was because I looked like Kikyou. That was when I found out he’d never even wanted me to begin with. It was only my appearance that he ‘humored our pathetic farce of a relationship’ but even then, I still fell short to his perfect, beautiful Kikyou.”
She said the last three words with such venom that Inuyasha winced, feeling like he’d been physically slapped.
“Kagome, please,” he rasped, avoiding her gaze.
Kagome blinked in confusion for a moment, then gasped when she realized how that must have sounded.
“Oh,” she squeaked, feeling wretched. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean—Inuyasha—”
“S’okay,” he murmured, dragging a hand down his face. “Don’t worry about it.”
Kagome still looked unconvinced, worrying her bottom lip as she stared at him with the guilt writ large on her face.
Amber eyes flashed her way, saw the clear regret in caramel-colored eyes, and he sighed. Lifting a hand, Inuyasha once more grabbed her own and laced their fingers before bringing it up to his mouth to press a light kiss to the back of her hand.
“It’s fine,” Inuyasha promised more firmly. “You were just caught up in the moment. I get it. And I know they were Naraku’s words, not yours.”
Relaxing, Kagome offered a wan smile and nodded.
“More or less,” she confirmed. “He didn’t say it in as many words, but it was largely implied. He kept listing all of my shortcomings compared to her. Kikyou was thinner, she had better hair, a bigger chest.” She shrugged.
On a random impulse in an attempt to bring a smile to her face, Inuyasha deliberately let his gaze trail lower than her face and lingered on her chest with obvious appreciation.
“Hmm,” he rumbled, the corners of his lips twitching. “I dunno about that last one—”
“Inuyasha.” Flushing, but snickering behind her hand, Kagome swatted his chest. She was rewarded with his husky laugh, the grin she had come to adore spreading across his face warming her heart.
“Sorry,” he said, not sounding sorry at all.
“You’re horrible.” She rolled her eyes but couldn’t stop a fond smile from curling her mouth upward.
Inuyasha’s face softened and he brought their joined hands up to brush his thumb over her lips.
“Yeah,” he agreed easily enough. “But it got you smiling, didn’t it?”
Expressive caramel eyes widened and her blush deepened. Then she sighed, shook her head with a light laugh, and pegged him with a warm smile that did funny things to his heart and made him feel all warm inside.
“Sneaky dog,” Kagome muttered and Inuyasha relished the way she settled her weight against him again as she leaned into his side. Unable to help himself he dropped a kiss to the top of her head.
“Anyway.” Heaving a sigh, Kagome wiggled around to get comfortable before continuing in a voice slightly more subdued. “Eventually I got tired of hearing his stupid voice and told him to shut up. Naturally he didn’t like that, but at that point I didn’t care. I went on and told him how done I was with him, how I wasn’t going to let him belittle or demean me anymore, manipulate or boss me around. With every word I said, Naraku lost a bit more of his composure. I started thinking if I could just keep him talking until you got there, because I knew you were coming for me—”
Inuyasha released a stuttered breath and buried his face in her hair, his grip on her hand tightening.
“—then I might get out of there alive. I came up with a plan then. It was risky, but it was the only thing I could come up with and it was better than nothing. So, I kept goading him on, telling him to shoot me already. I needed to distract him so he wouldn’t notice me opening Rain’s stall door behind me.”
Inuyasha grunted. He remembered her explaining this part of the story to her mom and stubborn grandfather.
“Naraku got so heated that I wouldn’t shut up like he wanted me to, he ended up firing a shot into the wall, but I was hardly fazed because he’d called me Kikyou.”
Kagome felt Inuyasha stiffen against her but she forged on, swallowing once to wet her suddenly dry mouth.
“That’s when I understood. He always hated when I acted out because it reminded him of Kikyou, and he hated it when she stood up to him, too. I called him out on it, and of course he denied it, but by now his coherency was starting to deteriorate. I will never forget the sound of his scream right before he bellowed, ‘She made me kill her.’”
Kagome paused and leaned forward to glimpse Inuyasha’s face, a concerned frown pulling her brows down low over her eyes. His eyes were closed and he was frowning; if it hadn’t been for his ears trained on her, she would have thought he wasn’t even listening.
“Keep going,” he said before she could ask if he was alright. “S’not like I wasn’t expecting it.”
She smiled wryly. “No, but it’s still tough to hear.”
He grunted but said nothing else. Kagome sighed.
Though still hesitant, Kagome nonetheless went on to describe Naraku’s morbid monologue about how Kikyou’s tendency to talk back led to her demise. She explained the mad man’s lapse of sanity when he proclaimed Kikyou wasn’t dead and how Kagome was a liar for telling him she was. She mentioned how surreal the moment was; how he kept teetering back and forth on the ledge of Kikyou’s death, one second saying how he’ll kill her too, but then the next declaring that his beloved Kikyou wasn’t dead. It was horrifying but fascinating at the same time, how he kept toeing the line of lunacy before suddenly ricocheting back to the real world.
“I provoked him again and again,” she continued, closing her eyes and sucking in a deep breath. “Until finally he gave this inhuman scream and I knew when he aimed the gun at me that time, he fully intended on shooting me. So I reacted before he had the chance to pull the trigger. I looked over his shoulder and pretended someone was behind him. He fell for it and looked behind him, and while he did that I unlocked Rain’s door and dove to the side. Rain bolted from her stall, crashed into him before disappearing outside, and down he went. He dropped the gun and I tried to grab it...but he was faster and he was mad.”
Shuddering, Kagome gripped his hand with both of hers, fighting back the tears that suddenly threatened to spill from her eyes. She sought to collect herself, concentrating on taking deep breaths.
“The way he looked right then,” she whispered, recalling the way Naraku had looked like death personified in those moments, “I still see in my nightmares. I really thought I was going to die, just like Kikyou had.” Her breath hitched in her throat. “I was so scared. And all I could think about…was you.”
Inuyasha snapped his head around so fast it was a wonder he didn’t get whiplash as his gaze zeroed in on the woman beside him. Teary caramel eyes lifted to collide with burnished amber. Swallowing the hard lump in his throat that was suddenly making it hard to breathe, Inuyasha tenderly wiped her tears away with the clawed fingers of his free hand, his chest feeling tight even as warmth spread throughout his entire body.
“But then you came,” she breathed, her smile small and trembling. “And you rescued me.”
Inuyasha was unable to stifle the whimper that erupted in his throat that time. He shook his head, wanting to tell her that she was wrong, that it was the other way around. She’d rescued him. But the emotion welling up inside him tightened his throat, preventing any words from escaping. So instead he did the only reasonable thing left.
Untangling his hand from hers, Inuyasha reached forward and then wordlessly snagged her around the waist before dragging her into his arms, holding her as Kagome collapsed against him with a quiet sob that damn near broke his heart. Crushing her against him, he buried his face in her hair while she clung to him, her own arms wrapped around his torso. He could feel her trembling as she pressed her face against his chest and finally released the torrent of emotion she’d so valiantly held back until now.
He held her as she cried. To Inuyasha, it felt like only a minor comfort that he could provide her a safe place to let it all go, the shelter of his arms hopefully protecting her from anything that would do her harm. But God did he wish he could do more. He wished he could take away her anguish and rewind time to make it so that bastard Naraku had never put his eyes or his filthy hands on her. Hell, maybe go back even further to five years ago and beg Kikyou to stay away from him. If he’d have been more insistent, if she’d listened to him, maybe she’d still be alive, Naraku wouldn’t develop his twisted infatuation with her, and Kagome would be spared the suffering she was currently going through.
But then again, if everything hadn’t played out as it had, he wouldn’t have met her. So maybe…maybe if he had only met her first—
Inuyasha paused. His brow furrowed as his arms tightened around the woman in his arms. In response she burrowed deeper into him, scrambling to be even closer. Inuyasha solved that by promptly dragging her between his legs and her ragged sigh while her arms snaked around his waist drifted up to his ears. Kagome settled against him, ear pressed above his heart, legs draped over his thigh, and her breathing slowly returned to normal.
Closing his eyes, Inuyasha released a low rumble and pressed his lips to her head. The feelings he had tried so hard to push back for her sake suddenly refused to be contained any longer and they spilled forth in a breathy sigh of her name. He couldn’t deny it anymore. Hell, he didn’t want to.
He loved her. God, he loved Kagome so damn much that he was even willing to forego his happiness with Kikyou if it meant a future where Kagome was happy, healthy, and free of any psycho exes.
The realization should have been frightening, along with the fact that he was willing to have never met Kikyou and fall in love with her if it meant a future with Kagome. But the truth was, Inuyasha felt a sort of peace that he hadn’t felt in…well, five years, and he’d be lying if he said he didn’t feel good about it. It felt good to finally admit it, to accept that there wasn’t a damn thing he could do. And he didn’t want to, anyway.
It didn’t matter anymore that he didn’t know if Kagome felt the same about him or not. It didn’t even matter that she was leaving in the morning because it wasn’t as though he’d never see her again. No, he wasn’t about to let her go that easily. He had her number and she had his. Inuyasha was determined to remain a staple in her life, a constant presence that would always be there for her even if their relationship never progressed any further than friendship. He needed her in his life in any way he could take, and for now, it was enough for him to know that she at least cared for him.
Now the only thing left for him to do was convince her that he not only cared, but that he didn’t see his former love when he looked at her. Nothing could ever be farther from the truth, and Inuyasha sought to tell her that right now. He took a deep breath of her sweet scent, let it ground him, center him, before beginning.
“Baby,” he rumbled, the endearment rolling off his tongue before he could even think about it. He shook his head, starting again with a voice raw with emotion.
“Kagome, you have to know that I never once saw you as a replacement for her.” He felt Kagome go very still against him but she remained quiet, hands flexing against his bare back. “I’ll be man enough to admit that I did see a resemblance when I first saw you on that back road a month ago, but it was nothing more than a passing thought. Something I noticed, but didn’t think too long on. Because the need to reassure that frightened woman who had obviously been through hell overrode anything else I might have been thinking at the time. After that first night, it didn’t cross my mind again even once.”
Kagome was silent as she digested that. Then with a whispering sigh, she wiggled around until her back was against his chest and her head tucked beneath his chin. She felt a little silly with how relieved she felt; a part of her had always known those words to be true, but she hadn’t realized how badly she’d needed to hear him say it.
Inuyasha rumbled his approval and wrapped his arms around her waist, kissing her head.
“When I look at you, I see you,” he continued and squeezed her waist to emphasize his words. “Not her, or anybody else. You need to forget that bastard’s words, Kagome. He only said them to hurt you, and I—”
Inuyasha suddenly paused as sudden realization washed over him. He blinked and wondered why he hadn’t realized it sooner. Kagome shifted against him and leaned a little to the side to catch a glimpse of his face, wondering why he had stopped.
“That’s why,” he said aloud, almost absentmindedly, and Kagome frowned, puzzled. He dropped his gaze down to hers and elaborated, “That’s why you were avoiding me all this time, because you thought I saw Kikyou whenever I looked at you. Didn't you?”
If the way her scent gradually soured with apprehension or how her heart rate suddenly skyrocketed hadn’t been clue enough already, the guilty flush that stole across her face before she looked away told him he’d hit the nail right on the head. He frowned down at her, pissed off that she’d even think that, but more than anything he was hurt that she thought so little of him.
“Dammit, Kagome—”
“It hurt,” Kagome admitted in a whisper and Inuyasha’s jaw snapped shut with an audible click. “I couldn’t bear the thought that you saw her when you looked at me, so I…I made it so that you couldn’t see me. I know now that it was selfish, and probably even rude, but I just kept thinking...if you don’t see me, then you…you don’t see her, right? It was a stupid way of thinking, and in my hurt I thoughtlessly ignored how I was hurting you and I…I’m sorry, Inuyasha, I didn’t mean—it just hurt so bad and I—”
She was starting to get upset again, her breathing becoming quicker, her body trembling. Taking a deep breath, Inuyasha pushed back his irritation in order to soothe his girl. He had to keep reminding himself that it didn’t matter now. It was in the past. Kagome was clearly regretful of her actions. What he needed to do now was reassure her that it was alright and that he didn’t blame her for anything.
Adjusting his hold on her, Inuyasha turned her just enough so he could cup her jaw and tilt her face upward, gratified when she didn’t try to hide from him again. Her eyes were bright with unshed tears, her cheeks flushed and her lower lip trembled as she stared up at him. His heart ached at the sight and he sighed, leaning in to press a tender kiss to her forehead.
“S’okay,” he rumbled and heard the hitch in her breath. “C’mon, no more tears. I can’t stand it when you cry.”
At that Kagome sniffled and took a deep, steadying breath in an attempt to calm her wavering nerves. It helped, and Inuyasha was glad when her heart rate finally returned to normal, her shaky sigh as she released the breath draining away the rest of the tension in her shoulders.
“I get it,” he told her on a sigh and reached up to tuck a strand of hair behind her ear. “You don’t need to apologize. It’s human instinct to avoid that which gives you pain, Kagome. I can’t fault you for that.”
“But I hurt you,” Kagome argued, voice barely above a whisper.
“Only because I hurt you first by not explaining when I had the chance,” Inuyasha returned evenly, his gaze unwavering on her own.
“It still doesn’t make it right.” Kagome frowned and worried her bottom lip, torn.
Inuyasha regarded her silently for a moment before nodding.
“No,” he conceded, “it doesn’t.” She pouted and his lips twitched.
“Alright, how about this.” He waited until her eyes lifted to meet his own, big, beautiful, and curious. “We admit we were both in the wrong, so let’s just call it even, however fucking twisted it is, and put it behind us. I won’t let you take the blame for this alone, Kagome, not when I fucked up just as bad. So deal?”
Finally, finally, his girl granted him a smile. And though it trembled just the slightest bit, it was genuine. He felt the vice on his chest ease up, letting him breathe a little easier.
“Deal,” she agreed and wiped at her red eyes. “I’m still sorry, though, for being a selfish little girl and hiding. Do you forgive me?”
She looked up at him then, cautious hope swimming in those dark eyes of hers while teeth worried her bottom lip. There was no way Inuyasha could possibly say no to that face.
“Only if you forgive me,” he replied and watched as her smile brightened. Her eyes went soft with relief as she nodded once and goddamn was she pretty.
“Can I ask you one last thing?” he murmured and he waited for her nod before continuing, “I told myself before that I wouldn’t ask because I was just grateful that it even happened, but now I figure why the hell not.”
He shrugged, and when Kagome blinked at him curiously, he cocked a brow and inquired, “After Kaede’s visit, something changed and you stopped trying to avoid me. Tell me why?”
His expression was soft, open, and the tone he’d used made it sound more like a plea than anything else. He was casually playing with a strand of her hair, twirling it around his finger as he stared into her eyes, and Kagome found herself answering him before she even knew what she was doing.
“Ever since I learned about Kikyou’s existence and what she was to you, I unfairly imagined her as this sort of…invisible force hovering over me all the time. It was like she was a constant reminder that she’d come first, that I would never be able to live up to what I thought you wanted. No matter how hard I tried to ignore it, it was just this constant pressure in the back of my mind, telling me that you were only using me like Naraku had because I looked so much like her.”
Kagome sighed and closed her eyes, missing the pained grimace that crossed the half-demon’s face as he looked away with a frown, jaw clenched and ears pinned against his head.
“I didn’t realize she had a sister,” she went on, voice soft. “And when I met Kaede, that’s just when it sort of clicked. I was being ridiculous. Kikyou wasn’t this ghostly figure following me around, determined to make my life as miserable as possible. Kikyou was a person, a human being, just like you, or me, or Kaede. She had a life. She had a job, family, friends, a…a fiancée. It wasn’t fair that I was blaming her for my misery when she was just as much a victim in this as you or me.”
Kagome paused to gather her thoughts, and when she snuck a glance at the man behind her, his face wasn’t very encouraging. Inuyasha was frowning, and though it wasn’t at her, she still felt a twinge of guilt as she dropped her gaze with a wince.
“Kikyou wasn’t this cruel phantom whispering in my ear about how I’d never be good enough,” she murmured, forcing herself to continue because he deserved to know the truth. “No, if anything that was just me, wrongfully projecting my doubts onto what I thought was the sole reason for this entire mess. That was when I realized I was being unfair to you, too. I was punishing you for my own insecurities when I should have talked to you about them instead and I’m…Inuyasha, I’m so sor—”
“Stop,” he said, cutting her off. Kagome released a quiet gasp, jerking her head up to stare at him in alarm. “Don’t apologize. We already went over this, didn’t we? But…but even so, there’s still one thing I don’t…”
A clawed hand cupped her face and without her permission tears welled in her eyes yet again before spilling down her cheeks. His thumb tenderly wiped them away as amber eyes bore into her own caramel-colored gaze.
“Baby,” he murmured and Kagome had to swallow back a quiet sob at the endearment she’d grown to love. “I would never…I could never use you like that. Fuck, you mean too much to me…you have to know by now that I care for you, Kagome. I care probably a helluva lot more than you do for me and when I saw Naraku pointing that gun at you, my heart nearly stopped because I was so damn scared. During those moments in the barn, it didn’t matter that I was staring down my dead fiancé’s killer. It didn’t matter that I was still bleeding from a hole in my stomach, it didn’t fucking matter that I had just left my best friend out in the rain to bleed out from a neck wound with only the mangy wolf to look after him.”
Kagome’s eyes widened and her mouth parted but he forged on, golden eyes intense, willing her to understand the depth of his feelings, to listen to what he wasn’t saying.
“No,” he rumbled and shifted his hand so he was holding her chin, ensuring her gaze remained on his. “No, the only thing that mattered to me then was protecting you, Kagome. To make sure history didn’t repeat itself and to keep that twisted son of a bitch that put his hands on you from taking you away from me. Your safety was my first priority, Kagome. Nothing else mattered, do you understand me?”
Kagome stared at him with big caramel eyes and the emotions he saw reflected in them – shock, confusion, cautious hope, and then finally gradual acceptance – made him think that he’d finally gotten through to her. But then she suddenly looked away, worrying her bottom lip, and he knew what she was going to say before she even said it.
“B-but…Kikyou—”
Inuyasha’s loud growl cut her off. Using the grip he had on her chin, he yanked her forward and leaned down to crush her mouth under his in a hard kiss. Kagome was too stunned to do anything but sit there, eyes wide and heart beating a mile a minute but then it was over as quick as it had begun.
Inuyasha pulled back and pegged her with a hard stare, taking in the flushed face and parted lips. His growl was pleased this time and he gave her chin a quick squeeze.
“Kikyou is dead, Kagome,” he said and the finality in his voice had Kagome gasping. “It took me a…a while to finally accept that, and now I need you to accept it. You’re here. She’s not.”
Eyes going heavy lidded, Inuyasha swept his thumb across the softness of her bottom lip and his voice was a low, pleasant rumble as he added, “And that’s how I want it.”
While Kagome gaped at him, looking beautifully flushed and clearly speechless, Inuyasha emitted a rough sigh and leaned in to brush his lips against hers again because to hell with it. The dam was broken; he’d foolishly went and kissed her when he shouldn’t have. And now he was unable to stop himself from doing it again, and again, until he was satisfied. But he doubted he would ever be fully sated with chaste kisses.
Not when he wanted so much more with her. And maybe it was selfish. Maybe he was just making things even worse for him in the long run. But if he could just have this one night with her, then Inuyasha was confident he’d be able to let her go without any regrets. If she let him, he would show her just how much he cared for her, prove that only she had been on his mind since day one, and no one else.
If tomorrow really was the last time he saw her, then he wanted her to know, to not let there be any doubt left that she had always been the one he wanted.
“One month ago,” he started, brushing his lips across hers, relishing in her choked gasp, the way her eyelashes fluttered against her flushed cheeks. “Back when I kissed you for the first time in this exact spot, the reason I pulled away wasn’t because you weren’t the woman I wanted.”
Exhaling roughly, Inuyasha nudged her over until her back was once more pressed against his chest and she was caged between his bent knees. His arms wrapped around her waist and he hugged her to him, burying his nose in her hair as he inhaled her scent.
“I promise the only woman that was on my mind that night was you,” he assured her and had to grin when she released a little sigh of relief.
“I stopped because I didn’t wanna take advantage of you, Kagome. You were still recovering from a relationship gone bad. I didn’t want you to think I was some creep that only thought with his dick.”
“I wouldn’t have thought that,” Kagome whispered and he grunted.
“Maybe not, but that doesn’t change that fact that I didn’t want to stop. I wanted to do a helluva lot more than just kiss you, but it wasn’t the right time, or the place. You deserved more than just a hasty fuck on the floor, Kagome. I also had to consider the possibility that…that you were rebounding and it wouldn’t have been fair to either of us if I let it continue.”
Kagome stiffened in his arms, clearly not very perceptive of that idea. Inuyasha just tightened his arms around her, not surprised at her reaction.
“No, baby, I’m not saying that you were rebounding, just that it was a possibility,” he stressed, lips pressed to her ear, and after a moment Kagome finally relaxed, giving a little nod of acknowledgment. “I only had your best interests at heart, Kagome. I still do. If suffering a mild case of blue balls meant we were both spared the pain of regret, well, I’d do it again if I had to.”
A giggle burst past her lips at that and Inuyasha chuckled with her. He nuzzled her head and pressed a kiss to her temple.
“I’m sorry I made you think that I didn’t care for you,” he rumbled and rested his forehead on her shoulder. “Or that I didn’t want you. Because that couldn’t have been farther from the truth.”
Kagome sucked in a sharp breath at his easy confession before releasing it in a shaky sigh as she closed her eyes. She swallowed once, twice, and felt her face grow warm as she tentatively placed a hand on his thigh, forcing the words she desperately wanted to say through a throat tight with nerves.
“Is…is that…still true?”
Her voice was barely above a whisper and she bit her lip, unconsciously holding her breath as she waited for his answer.
She didn’t have to wait long. Inuyasha did answer, but not in the way she was expecting.
Instead of replying verbally, Inuyasha decided to let his body do the talking for him. Without a single word he started pressing gentle kisses to her shoulder while his hands deftly slipped beneath her cami and slowly roved the soft skin of her stomach. Instinctively Kagome tensed as a quiet gasp escaped her and immediately Inuyasha stopped, mouth pressed against the smooth skin where her neck met her shoulder. If she gave any indication that she was reluctant to continue or was uncomfortable, or even asked him to stop, then he would without protest. He’d be disappointed of course, but never would he pressure her into anything she didn’t want.
With his hands, warm and pleasantly calloused, pressed against her stomach and his lips exploring the curve of her neck and shoulder, Kagome was having a hard time concentrating on anything else. But she closed her eyes and forced herself to consider what he was silently asking.
As it turned out, it was only a few seconds that passed before Kagome came to a decision and she was a little surprised with how easy it was. After all, she’d wanted this ever since he’d first kissed her in this same exact spot what seemed like a lifetime ago. He’d already explained the reasons why he’d stopped then, all of them perfectly logical, and nothing like what she’d originally feared.
Kikyou wasn’t an obstacle anymore. She’d had an entire month to cope with what happened, during which her attraction for the half-demon had only grown. Inuyasha explaining his relationship with Kikyou and how it all began was surprisingly very helpful in that regard. Misunderstandings had been cleared, assurances had been made, and Inuyasha clearly wanted this as much as she did.
So…what was stopping her?
Nothing, Kagome mused, lips curving into a smile as she closed her eyes and eased back into him, sighing in response to his pleased growl.
Nothing at all.
Relieved, Inuyasha sought to thank her acquiescence with languid, open-mouthed kisses along the slender column of her neck, fangs gently scraping while his claws teased the soft skin of her stomach. Kagome shuddered against him, breath quickening and with a low growl echoing in his throat, he once more placed one hand flat against her stomach while the other made a slow ascent upward, taking her shirt with it. Inuyasha gave a sucking kiss to the sensitive flesh just below her ear and without warning shoved her back against him until she was nestled tightly between his thighs, not an inch of space between them.
Kagome made a soft sound of surprise that was a mix between a gasp and a grunt, but otherwise didn’t object, sinking back against him and even lifting an arm to wrap around his neck. Letting her head fall back onto his shoulder, she turned just enough to brush her lips against his jaw in a whisper soft kiss. Her only warning was a muttered curse before her mouth was crushed under his in a demanding, hungry kiss.
Groaning as he finally, finally kissed her again for the first time in a fucking month, Inuyasha wasted no time in reacquainting himself with her taste, bringing a hand up to cradle her jaw and slipping his tongue between her parted lips. Kagome moaned and he swallowed the sound, sliding his hand to the back of her head to keep her in place as his mouth slanted over hers again and again, rendering her incapable of logical thought and stealing the very breath from her lungs.
He poured all of his pent-up hunger in that single heated connection, letting her know with every wicked slash of his tongue, every nip of his fangs, and every deep growl that echoed in his throat just how much, how long he’d wanted this. Her lips were so goddamn soft, warm and pliant and just like she had that first time, she gave back as good as she got, returning his hunger with her own, slicking her tongue against his and emitting the sweetest little moans that went straight to his rapidly hardening cock.
With a willpower that Inuyasha didn’t even know he possessed, he managed to tear his mouth away from hers but only long enough for both of them to drag in a few deep breaths of air before claiming her lips once more. Though no less passionate, this one lacked any urgency and he kissed her with a languid hunger that had Kagome’s toes curling and warmth pooling in the pit of her belly. With his fingers tangled in her hair, he angled her for his pleasure, swallowing her whimpers and whines as he drew on her mouth like the greedy bastard that he was, forever addicted to her taste.
Kagome was the one to end it this time, dragging her mouth away and panting for air as dark eyes glazed with desire gazed up at him from a beautifully flushed face. She liked her lips, red and swollen from his ardent attention, and Inuyasha cursed as he leaned his forehead against her own.
“God,” he rasped and Kagome shivered at the roughness of his voice. “You have no fucking idea how long I’ve wanted to do that.”
Kagome smiled, a slow, seductive upturn of her lips, and slid a hand into his hair to capture a furry ear, fingers rubbing the sensitive flesh and eliciting a low growl of pleasure from him.
“Probably just about as long as I’ve been wanting you to do that,” she breathed and bit her lip to stifle her giggle at his muttered curse.
“Yeah?” he growled. Kagome was suddenly very aware of his hands as they both slipped beneath her shirt and traveled up toward her chest.
“How ‘bout this? You been wanting me to do this, too?”
With only a wicked flash of fang as her only warning, his hands closed over her breasts and Kagome’s mouth dropped open on a startled moan as he dragged his claws across her nipples. Her back arched and latching onto her neck with his mouth, he toyed with the sensitive peaks of her breasts, gently pinching and rolling until they were hardened buds dark pink from his ardent attention.
Breathing labored and teeth worrying her bottom lip, Kagome whimpered as another wave of heat gently rolled through her body to coalesce between her thighs in a steady, throbbing ache. Inuyasha was touching her everywhere now and the pleasant roughness of his palms as they skimmed her body had pleasurable little tingles skittering across her skin. He was maddeningly thorough with his gentle, unhurried exploration, tracing her curves, dragging his claws down her sides and eliciting little shivers of desire. His fingers danced across her stomach and while one hand teased the sensitive skin just below her navel, the other paid homage to her breasts once again, massaging, caressing, loving.
With the crotch of her cotton shorts completely soaked through by now, Kagome was anxiously waiting for him to slip his hand into her shorts and relieve the unbearable ache between her thighs but he didn’t. He seemed content to stroke and caress her lower belly while he littered hot kisses up and down her neck, nibbling gently and deliberately scraping the flesh with his fangs just to feel her shudder and gasp against him.
Kagome whined and rolled her hips forward, a wordless plea. Inuyasha growled and slipped his fingers beneath the waistband, far enough to briefly brush the course patch of hair above her mound, but then removed them just as quickly. Kagome moaned in frustration and she felt him smirk against her neck. She would have called him something very rude had he not abruptly dipped his hand and stroked her through the damp fabric of her shorts.
She cried out in surprise and he did it again, rubbing her through her shorts and she spread her legs wider, encouraging him with breathless whimpers, needy moans, but it wasn’t enough, it wasn’t enough. She needed more, the rough press of his fingers only sharpening the ache, the tension growing, intense, burning. Kagome keened, and then did something she probably never would have done had she been more coherent. She grabbed his wrist, dragged his hand from between her legs, and then not so patiently guided it into her shorts, her grip on his wrist firm and at this point, completely unconscious.
The first touch of his clawed fingers against the hot, slick flesh of her center was euphoric and a ripple of pleasure coursed through the entirety of her body, making her gasp as her back arched and her hips rocked forward into his hand. Behind her Inuyasha cursed, adjusted his hand, and then oh god yes he was stroking her sodden heat, gliding clawed fingers through her liquid fire and toying with the hard bundle of nerves hidden within her folds.
Kagome writhed and bucked, hands finding purchase on his thighs and fisting the fabric of his jeans tightly as pleasure rocked her entire body. She moaned, panted, pleaded for him to take her over that edge, only vaguely aware of her lover whispering in her ear how beautiful she looked punctuated by wicked promises that sharpened the ache, made her throb, moan for completion, and Inuyasha couldn’t help but to oblige.
With a hedonistic growl Inuyasha abruptly plunged two fingers into her tight heat and furiously rubbed her clit with his thumb. Then he grabbed her chin, jerked her face toward his, and slammed his mouth onto hers in time to swallow her cry of completion as she came apart in his arms.
Inuyasha sipped at her lips, nipping the tender flesh, slicking his tongue across her bottom lip, stealing her whispering moans and breathless gasps as she slowly came down from her orgasm. He kissed her one last time, gently, lovingly, before pulling back and then abruptly getting to his feet with her cradled in his arms.
Still recovering from one hell of an orgasm, Kagome was barely aware of Inuyasha standing and carrying her toward the stairs and without thinking her arms slipped around his neck. She smiled, because she knew where he was taking them, and she waited until they were in the hallway right outside his bedroom before whispering for him to set her down.
He shot her a brief quizzical look, but did as she asked, and no sooner did Kagome’s feet hit the floor that she threw herself against him. Inuyasha’s back hit the wall and his grunt of surprise was cut off by Kagome’s mouth sealing over his in a hot, urgent kiss that ripped a guttural groan from his throat. Before he could return it, the little minx pulled back, tipped him a mischievous little smirk, and slid sensuously down his body. Panting as he stared down at her with heavy-lidded amber eyes, it took Inuyasha a minute to figure out what she was planning. But when it finally hit him, she’d already unfastened his jeans, slipped her hand inside and all he could do was watch as she kissed the head of his cock before taking him into her mouth.
“Ah, fuck.”
Inuyasha’s head hit the wall with a dull thud but he hardly felt it, closing his eyes tight as he bared his fangs and hissed through his teeth from the searing pleasure rocketing through his body. He speared his fingers into her hair, not to push, but just to touch as she braced her hands on his thighs and swallowed his cock like a fucking champ.
It was the last thing he’d expected, the feeling of her hot mouth enveloping his erection, but he wasn’t going to complain about it. Hell, he could barely breathe through the intense sensation, let alone gather enough air to utter even a single word. All he could do was hiss and grunt through his teeth, fingers tangled in her hair as he gently rolled his hips forward to meet the hungry insistence of her mouth.
Kagome hummed around his shaft and her hands left his thighs to stroke and pet the flesh of his lower stomach, fingers tracing the ridges of his abdomen and brushing against the V of his hips in soft, teasing caresses. She slowed the pace of her mouth on him and twirled her tongue around his tip, licking, teasing, hot lashes of her tongue that derived the most delicious sounds from her half-demon lover. Rough grunts and lurid curses spilled from his lips, low moans and muttered curses spurring her on as he raked his fingers through her hair while his other hand groped at the wall behind him, claws gouging the wood, a permanent reminder of their passion.
Without warning Kagome surged forward again, taking in as much of his cock as she could before slowly pulling back on a hard suck that ripped a groaned curse from his throat. She released him from her mouth, licked her lips, and then pressed a kiss to the tip of his shaft, dark eyes focused on his face flushed with pleasure. She waited until amber eyes darkened with lust and pleasure met her own and she tipped him a smile before wrapping her hand around his cock and leaning forward to press her mouth against the hot flesh of his stomach.
The breath punched out of his lungs in a ragged exhale that might have been her name as he watched her, eyes heavy-lidded, sweeping back her hair from her face as she peppered his abdomen with nibbling kisses. Her hand moved up and down his shaft, pumping him slowly almost in an absentminded way as she kept the majority if her concentration worshiping the hard muscles of his stomach and the sensitive skin of hips. Her free hand peeled back his jeans enough to press her mouth where his thigh and torso met, sucking a kiss to the skin there and reveling in the way his hips jerked, his muscles quivering beneath her touch as he hissed through tightly clenched teeth.
Flicking her gaze up to his face again, she made sure he was watching as she licked around the base of his cock before dragging her tongue down the hard length of him and sucking the head into her mouth. Inuyasha released a hedonistic growl and her only warning was a flash of wicked fangs right before he grasped her arms and heaved her up his body. Kagome went willingly and she moaned in approval when his hands cupped her ass and hoisted her up against him, wrapping her legs around his waist and accepting his hungry kiss with a breathy sigh of his name.
Even with her kissing him with a savage hunger that was very distracting and her ass grinding down against his exposed cock, Inuyasha still somehow managed to get both of them into his bedroom with minimal difficulty. Her back hit the mattress and still she didn’t stop, her mouth relentless, needy against his own as her hands traced every divot, followed every raised line, mapped the ridges and hardened tissue that were evidence of a painful past. Unbidden tears pricked her eyes because just as his skin was scarred, so too was the heart that lie behind it, and Kagome wished she could soothe and love the part of him that had endured the most pain, the kind that leaves even worse scars than the physical kind. He had been through so much and yet had come out stronger because of it, not allowing the ghosts of his past drag him down. Kagome had never admired someone more, had never…never loved—
His lips brushed against her eyes, kissing away her tears, and Kagome sighed, heart so full of affection for this wonderful man. He trailed his mouth down the bridge of her nose, kissed it, then did the same to her cheeks, her jaw, chin, neck until her entire face was littered with his adoration and Kagome was about ready to sob.
Instead she dragged him back to her mouth and kissed him with a slow, heated passion that had him groaning against her and skating his hands down her sides to arrest her hips in a firm grip. With his tongue and lips igniting the fire between them again, goading her on until she was mewling, pressing up against him as her hands dropped to his toned abdomen, Inuyasha once more slipped his hands beneath her shirt to caress soft skin, dragging clawed hands up her stomach to flick and pull at her nipples. She gasped, he growled, and then—
“Fuck,” Inuyasha hissed, darting a hand out to grip the wooden headboard as she dragged her nails up his stomach, over his chest, then back down again. The breath punched out of his lungs in a rough exhale and through gritted teeth he rumbled, “You’re gonna kill me, baby.”
“Mmm,” Kagome purred, the curl of her lips impish and her eyes glinting with a devilish light. She trailed a single finger down the line of silver hair and brushed her fingers over the steel rod jutting proudly from his hips.
“But what a way to go,” she murmured. Inuyasha laughed, a short burst of hot air that ruffled her bangs before his mouth abruptly came down and covered hers in a rough kiss.
He curled himself over her, using both hands to cup her face, fingers stroking, caressing. He sought to tell her how much she meant to him with his kiss, his touch, the needy growls and moans she derived from him with a whispered gasp of his name on her lips. Over and over his mouth claimed hers, moving away to drag in more air only to dive in again and taste the sweetness she graciously gave him. His hands dragged through her hair, claws tangling, tilting her head, securing her for his pleasure but always, always giving as much as he took, every nip of his fangs soothed by a hot sweep of his tongue and every heated growl tempered by her breathy sighs.
Through it all she never stopped touching him and he didn’t tell her to stop, the crush of his mouth on hers demanding and the teasing glide of her hands across his flesh staking an ownership on far more than just his body. While his hands seared a path from her shoulders to her waist, slender fingers slipped around to his back and caressed the hot flesh at the nape of his neck, nails digging in just the slightest and dragging across his shoulder blades. Inuyasha groaned and ground his hips into hers, a reminder of what she did to him. Kagome exhaled, drew his lip into her mouth, and raised her knee to hook her thigh against his hip in order to press herself against the hardness wreaking havoc on her body.
He cursed, she moaned, and giving the tempting softness of her mouth several more drugging kisses that had her hands trying to draw him back down to her, Inuyasha forced himself to lean back, not without a husky chuckle at her whimpered protest, and slipped his hands beneath her shirt. Kagome arched into his touch, eyes closing, mouth parting on a soundless whisper of his name. Inuyasha watched with eyes gone heavy-lidded as he slowly pushed the garment up her flat stomach and up to her chest. Her skin was soft, smooth beneath the roughness of his palms and he relished in the sensation, loved the way she shivered, quaked beneath his hot touch. After a quiet murmur to raise her arms, he swiftly tugged the shirt over her head before dropping it carelessly to the floor.
Bared, breathless, and so fucking beautiful, Inuyasha’s breath hitched in his throat as he took in the absolute vision before him. Arms raised above her head, face flushed, dark eyes glittering up at him and her mouth curved in a demure but knowing little smile, Kagome lie there before him with nothing to hide, baring her soul, her heart to his heated amber gaze as it swept down her body. The breath stuttered in her lungs and her heart pounded in her chest, the twin peaks at her breasts hardening beneath his leisurely but ardent perusal and the growl that thundered in his chest was all kinds of appreciative pleasure.
Trembling with a need so fierce, so deep and visceral and urgent, Inuyasha released a shuddering breath and reached for her, fearing that if he didn’t touch her right now he would die. He needed it more than air, than the very heart that beat frantically in his chest. With another growl that was borne of his hunger for her, Inuyasha grabbed her hands, threaded his fingers through hers as he bent his head and worshiped her mouth with his own. He licked, sucked, teased, and tasted her as she sighed and keened against him. Kagome writhed, pleading with no words for him to soothe the unbearable ache and he was unable to resist, heeding the siren’s call of her body without an instant’s hesitation.
With a herculean effort he managed to pull back from the enticing sweetness of her mouth, taking a moment to nibble the soft flesh of her bottom lip before brushing a trail of tender kisses along the slender line of her jaw, now perfectly smooth and unblemished. Memories of her skin darkened with the violence of a relationship gone wrong flashed through his head and with a low growl Inuyasha lavished the skin with kisses, worshiping the spot with love when before another’s touch had not been so kind. He swore never again would she bear any marks of abuse or hate. He vowed right then and there that his Kagome would only ever know the touch of a lover, the only marks left behind from passion and never pain, forever cherished, heart and body worshiped like the goddess he was to him.
And she understood the gesture for what it was, the softness of her lips brushing against his cheek in a whisper soft kiss that spoke volumes. Inuyasha sighed then with a final kiss to her jaw he continued his gentle loving of her body, blazing a path of kisses down her neck, fangs scraping the flesh, tongue lashing out and sampling the heated skin. She gasped, whimpered, told him of her pleasure by the telling press of her hips into his. With a low growl meant to soothe, he released her hands and skated his palms down her arms, skimming the soft flesh, claws teasing as he grazed the enticing curve of her waist before arresting her hips.
Mouth pressed against the hollow of her throat, Inuyasha flicked his tongue against the sensitive flesh there before kissing a hot path down to her chest. He took his time, laving the space between her breasts with licks, nips, and wet kisses until she was trembling and breathless beneath him. Her hands dove into his hair, fingers finding his ears and stroking the soft flesh between deft fingers. Inuyasha growled his approval and abruptly turned his head to capture a stiff nipple in his mouth, relishing in her whispered cry of pleasure as he swirled his tongue around the pebbled flesh, sucking, nibbling, and kissing before promptly switching to her other breast to give it the same treatment.
Kagome was whining beneath him, hands tugging at his hair, hips arching into his own, and smelling so fucking delicious Inuyasha wanted to devour her until she was screaming, flushed, and utterly sated. There had only been one other time in his life where he’d craved somebody this fiercely, with such intensity that it was a constant battle just to remain in control of his instincts. Even then Inuyasha was pretty damn sure his desire for this woman trumped even that of his former love.
Kagome was honest attraction contained in luscious curves and sweet smiles; she was raw energy veiled behind beautiful dark eyes and gentle touches; she was savage desire wrapped up in breathless whispers of his name and heated kisses against his skin, promising passion, her heart, the entire world and he was helpless but to obey her every whim.
Kagome was everything. Everything he’d ever wanted, everything he needed, and he was determined to show her that, forcibly ignoring his own arousal in favor of hers so he could show her how much she meant to him without the words he didn’t know how to say. And maybe she would understand, maybe she wouldn’t, but it didn’t matter. Either way Inuyasha was going to do his damnedest to give her the sweet, honest loving that she deserved, and not the rough sex that his body was demanding.
And if he ended up giving himself the worst case of blue balls ever, then so fucking what. He’d managed to live with her for an entire month with what seemed like a permanent semi; he could survive a few more minutes.
Both nipples thoroughly lavished and glistening from his ardent attention, Inuyasha decided that the pale flesh of her breasts needed evidence of his passion as well and spent a good amount of time licking, nipping, and sucking until the soft mounds were littered with his marks. A bout of pure masculine pride swept through him as he studied his handiwork and the growl that welled in his throat was all kinds of possessive appreciation. He kissed each one, surged up to place a hard kiss to her mouth before once more dipping his head and leaving a series of sucking kisses down her sternum to the softness of her stomach. Kagome squirmed beneath him, hands tugging at his hair, and he could hear her breath quickening, her heart racing in her chest, and the smirk that curled his lips was positively wicked.
And his sassy girl must have felt it against her skin because she suddenly swatted his shoulder. He couldn’t help but laugh, resting his forehead against her stomach as his shoulders shook in his mirth. He heard Kagome huff, but then he kissed her navel, slipped his fingers beneath the hem of her cotton shorts, and then any vexation she might have felt toward him completely vanished when he tugged them off her hips then down her legs. Her breath hitched and she dug her nails into his shoulders, but otherwise did not protest and with a flick of his wrist the garment dropped to the floor, forgotten.
Clawed hands wrapped around slim thighs, gently nudging them apart. Kagome inhaled sharply then after a second’s hesitation she relaxed, and he thanked her with a light kiss just above her mound. She gasped, he growled, and with gentle fervor Inuyasha ravished the inside of her thighs with his mouth, using lips, tongue, and fangs until she was a trembling, panting mess beneath him, until the insides of her thighs were slick not only from his mouth, but the heady evidence of her growing arousal.
Breathing hard, heated amber eyes zeroed in on the hot wetness of her and for a split second his control wavered, unable to resist leaning in and giving those glistening pink folds a long, hard lick. Kagome cried out and jerked at the shock of pleasure that rushed through her body, eyes going wide as her head tossed back. He did it again, this time eliciting a long, drawn out moan from her that went straight to his cock.
With a groan and then a curse, Inuyasha gave her center one last lingering kiss before forcibly removing himself from between her legs and surging up her body to claim her mouth in a hard, demanding kiss. While the thought of devouring her until she screamed herself hoarse was mighty appealing, Inuyasha didn’t think he’d be able to bear not being inside her for even a moment more. He was harder than he’d ever been in his entire goddamn life, his cock throbbing painfully and he suspected if he didn’t get some relief soon, he’d come in his pants like a fucking teenager.
Grinding his hips into hers, moaning as she bucked up against him and drove his erection into the exposed heat of her sex, Inuyasha cupped her face in his hands and kissed her again and again, slanting his mouth over hers, hot, rough, and demanding. Kagome matched his fervor with her own, hands clawing at his shoulders, tugging at his hair, biting his lip and sucking his tongue into her mouth to duel with her own.
“God,” Inuyasha groaned against her mouth, spearing his fingers into her hair and jerking her head back to attack her neck. “You’re so fucking beautiful.”
He nipped and sucked the flesh of her throat while his hands traversed her body, claws grazing, fingers teasing, caressing every inch of skin he could reach and reveling in every little sound she made. He fucking loved that her hands were by no means idle either, touching everywhere, racking over his shoulders, down his chest, across his stomach and following the line of silver hair thickened into a coarse thatch right above his erection.
“Please,” Kagome whispered and promptly wrapped her fingers around this thick length. He grunted but then he was hissing through his teeth when slender fingers squeezed and a low hum of pure feminine appreciation drifted to his ears.
Despite himself Inuyasha chuckled and growled against her lips, “Like that, huh?”
In response Kagome smiled, bit down on his lip and gave his length a long, firm stroke. Something between a curse and a strangled groan echoed in his throat as his hips bucked forward of their own accord.
“Like that, hm?” she fired back in a sultry little purr and fuck, he’d never been so turned on before in his life.
“Brat,” he growled right before swooping down and crushing her mouth under his in a rough kiss that told her in no uncertain terms how much he loved her sass. And judging by how eagerly she responded to him Kagome heard his message loud and clear, releasing his cock to shove impatiently at his jeans, wanting them off now, dammit.
With a primitive growl that Kagome felt in some very nice places, Inuyasha tore his mouth from hers and reared up to obey her wordless command, standing briefly to shove his pants the rest of the way down before kicking them to some forgotten corner. He wasted no time in reclaiming his position above her, however as much as he wanted to plunge himself into her tight heat and pound away, his hands were leisurely as they explored her body, his mouth a relentless force on hers, but unhurried in its hunger.
Kagome, however, was having none of that. She tugged, she whined, she pulled at his shoulders, dragging his body down until it was flush against her own and trying to wrap her legs around his hips. The fire in her belly, in her blood was too hot, raging into an inferno she couldn’t contain and it felt as if the flames were licking at her skin, threatening to consume her.
“Inuyasha,” she pleaded on a breathy moan, arching her body into his as her arms slipped around his neck. “Please. I can’t…”
“Shh,” her half-demon soothed and pressed a series of hot, drugging kisses to her mouth. “I got you, baby. S’okay.”
“Do you promise?” Kagome whispered and the breath caught in Inuyasha’s throat as he levered himself up just enough to catch her gaze with his own.
Those caramel-colored eyes he loved so much shone up at him, so damn expressive, open, and glinting with a sort of vulnerability that made him want to gather her close, hide her away, and shelter her for the rest of her life. Her smile was small and trembling, her hands shook as she cupped his face, but the amount of trust in that smile, in her eyes as she stared up at him had the breath rushing out of his lungs in a harsh exhale and a peculiar prickling sensation to develop behind his eyes.
Swallowing hard once, twice, Inuyasha bent his head to rest his forehead against her own as one hand came up to cover hers still pressed against his face while the other reached down to grasp her thigh. Kagome let out a stuttered sigh and closed her eyes.
“Yeah, baby,” he murmured, breath warm against her lips. “I promise.”
The smile she gave him then was comparative to that of the rising sun: brilliant, bright, and so goddamn beautiful Inuyasha momentarily forgot how to breathe. Emotion swelled, thick, strong, intense and he was utterly helpless but to give in to her allure. The breathless whisper of his name was answered by a hoarse rumble of hers before he covered her mouth with his and stole that smile for his own. It was absolutely staggering, what she made him feel, and he could only hope that he instilled those same emotions in her, drove her crazy with want, fanned the flames of desire higher while at the same time soothing the ragged scars of a hurtful past.
Kagome surged and whimpered beneath him, wordless pleas falling from her lips drowned out by the hungry growls of her lover. She keened, hands everywhere on his body, and he’d be lying if he said he didn’t absolutely fucking love the impatient little sounds she made as she dug her fingers into the small of his back and then racked her nails over his hips, tugging him closer.
Then the devilish little vixen boldly dragged her fingers down the length of his erection where it was nestled between her legs. He felt the sly little upturn of her lips as the breath exploded out of his lungs in a choked, harsh exhale against her mouth. It abruptly vanished, however, when he snapped his hips forward, driving his cock against her slick heat, and her gasp was swallowed by his mouth as he grabbed her thigh and roughly jerked it against his hip, grinding her against him.
Kagome moaned, he cursed, and he rested his forehead against her own, breathing harsh, body trembling, heart pounding.
“You good?” he rasped, kissing her once, twice, as he shifted his hips and readied himself to plunge into her. God he was so fucking ready—
“I’m always good when I’m with you,” Kagome breathed and nipped his bottom lip as her arms slipped around his neck.
The strangled sound that echoed in his throat had Kagome biting her lip to stifle her giggle but she was unable to contain it at his strained, “Dammit, Kagome—”
“Inuyasha,” Kagome whispered, lifting her hips against his, and he was done for.
With a fervent growl of her name, a heated kiss, and a stuttered breath, Inuyasha drove his hips forward and slid home in one solid thrust.
The tight grip of wet, scorching flesh; the feeling of soft, heated skin beneath his hands and against his mouth; the feminine cry of passion in his ears as delicate nails dug into his back, clawing, tugging, desperate, the frenzied touch of a wanton lover. It was too much and for a long moment Inuyasha could do nothing as he adjusted to the intense sensations, panting against the damp skin of her neck, his body shuddering, heart pounding a rapid tattoo in his chest. He wanted to tell her what she meant to him, how badly he wanted her to stay, but when he opened his mouth all that came out was her name uttered on a ragged sigh.
But still, that single word managed to hold the weight of his feelings, possessing a thousand secrets, a million promises if only she would stay by his side. And it was unclear if Kagome heard his silent plea, understood all that he was unable to say. Because when she answered him with a breathy whisper of his own name and a kiss so sweet, so warm Inuyasha felt the breath stutter in his lungs, it suddenly didn’t matter if she knew or not.
Nothing else mattered in that moment except for them, entangled together, body to body, heart to heart. So when Kagome started whispering his name over and over while undulating against him, a silent plea, Inuyasha was helpless but to give her what she wanted—what they both so desperately craved.
Tearing his mouth from hers with a rough groan, Inuyasha leaned his forehead against her own and wrapped an arm around her waist to keep her pressed tight against him. Kagome gasped and then whined, trying to get him to move again by arching her back and tugging at his hips. Inuyasha grunted, caught one of her hands and trapped it above her head, lacing their fingers, before abruptly shoving his hips hard against her own, pinning them to the bed. The resulting shock of intense pleasure had both of him releasing long, drawn out moans.
Recovering after a long moment, Inuyasha lifted his head and gently nipped her nose, then her lips, drawing her attention.
“Look at me,” he rumbled, lips brushing hers with every word, every panted breath. He waited until her eyes, darkened with lust and glazed over in pleasure, met his own heated gaze before he slowly, deliberately drew back his hips and thrust forward.
Kagome’s mouth fell open on a cry of pleasure as another groan tore from his throat. Her eyes fluttered close but his sharp growl and another nip to her chin prompted her to meet his gaze once more. She was unable to look away from the heated intensity of those golden eyes as he withdrew only to slam into her again and again. The controlled pace he’d set was gradually becoming harder and faster until he was all but pounding her into the mattress, heated growls and moans escaping him without pause while his lover’s cries and whimpers for more only spurred him on.
Then her legs hooked around his waist, she lifted her hips to meet his thrust with one of her own and gyrated her hips, grinding, clamping his cock within the tight walls of her sex and Inuyasha lost it. He came with a rough shout, burying his face in her neck as he rode out the waves of pleasure that coursed through his body. His hips jerked forward of their own accord in a few more lazy thrusts before he stilled above her, gasping for breath, and only vaguely aware of Kagome’s hands smoothing up and down his back while she pressed little kisses to the side of his head.
“Fuck,” he mumbled and he felt more than heard Kagome’s breathy giggle. Shit, but it had come out of fucking nowhere. He hadn’t even realized how damn close he was, but as he lie there on top of his girl, Inuyasha realized that it had merely taken the edge off. He was still hard inside her, throbbing and ready for round two, and with a smirk he also realized that Kagome hadn’t finished yet.
Well. He’d just have to do something about that, wouldn’t he? After all, it was only fair, and after he made her scream his name, they’d be two for two. Inuyasha saw absolutely no flaws in that discovery, so he wasted no time in fanning the flames of passion between them once again.
Lifting himself up onto his hands, Kagome’s only warning was a fanged smirk and a devilish glint in amber eyes before he was suddenly rolling them so he was on his back. Kagome yelped in surprise to suddenly find herself on top but the new position buried him even deeper inside her and the moan that escaped her lips was completely involuntary.
Inuyasha chuckled and she managed to level a glare down at him. He grinned at her and caught her hands in his, linking their fingers and squeezing once. Just like that her expression melted into a smile and she watched him slowly trail his gaze down her body, lingering on her breasts. When it landed on where they were intimately joined, the growl that escaped him gave off all kinds of pure male satisfaction and heady approval.
Kagome bit her lip as her eyes went heavy-lidded and keeping her eyes on his face, she rolled her hips, gasping at the pleasure that rocked through her. Inuyasha cursed and encouraged her to do it again with a lift of his hips, driving himself deeper into her. Kagome’s head fell back on a moan and using the grip she had on his hands as an anchor, she rode him, rocking her hips forward and back, grinding herself on the hard ridge of his cock.
Through it all Inuyasha talked to her, telling her how fucking beautiful she was, how good it felt, keep going, baby, that’s it, don’t stop. Every so often he would release a lurid curse before surging against her, driving his cock into her and making her cry out from the intense pleasure. Faster and faster she moved against him, goaded by his little growls, his naughty words, sinful promises that sharpened the ache between her legs until it wasn’t enough, it wasn’t enough.
With a desperate cry, Kagome tugged her hands from his and braced them on his stomach so she could raise herself up and drop down hard onto him. It was good, it was so good, and she did it again, bouncing up and down, tossing her head back as the coli tightened in her belly, the tension building, growing hotter, burning, threatening to consume her alive if she didn’t find relief soon.
Clawed hands found her hips and assisted her, lifting her up only to slam her right back down onto him. Kagome sobbed his name, her hands latching onto her own breasts for lack of anything else to hold on to, and she heard a tortured groan right before she felt herself falling. Her back hit the mattress and she opened her eyes to find Inuyasha’s face above her own, mouth parted as he dragged in deep breaths of air, and his eyes were hot as they bore into her own.
He dipped his head, brushed his lips against hers, whisper soft as he pulled his hips back and rolled forward in a slow, controlled thrust. Kagome’s whimper was muffled by his mouth covering hers again in another languid kiss while once more he rocked into her, teasing her with measured thrusts that fueled the fire in his blood. Her hands grasped at his sides, nails racking his hips as she rose to meet him with a sharp gasp only to sink back down into the mattress with a clenched moan.
Inuyasha panted against her lips, a groan echoing in his throat as his fevered gaze caught her own before his hand hitched her thigh higher onto his hip and drove forward in a tight, hard thrust. He did it again, and again, thrusting into her at a maddeningly slow pace that was as torturous as it was euphoric. Her hands pulled at his shoulders, raked down his arms, head tossing back into the pillows only to surge upward and nip his skin with her teeth as she rose against him, smiling when he followed her back down and crushed her mouth beneath his in a hot kiss. Her hands were in his hair, fingers pulling at the silver stands, rubbing his ears, curling around the back of his neck to keep his mouth to hers as she thrashed and undulated her body to meet the steady ebb and flow of his own.
Her hands dropped to his muscled back, slick with sweat, and traced the line of his spine before cupping his ass and lifting her hips just as he drove forward in another slow thrust. Inuyasha grunted and then chuckled against her lips and when he felt the sly curve of her mouth against his own, he growled, nipped the soft flesh of her bottom lip, and then pumped into her harder. The previously steady stroke of his hips became harder, faster, unable to deny her what she wanted any more than he could stop his own growing hunger, his need climbing with every whimper, very moan and every touch of her eager hands against his hot skin.
He grazed his lips against hers, a silent entreaty to meet his gaze. When impassioned caramel eyes locked with heated burnished amber, the fire in his stomach, in his blood, burned even hotter. Then she mouthed his name against his lips before kissing him with a slow, languid hunger that he felt in the deepest regions of his heart and Inuyasha’s control snapped.
He growled her name, Kagome whimpered, and the sound was swallowed by his greedy mouth as he returned her kiss with a savage, urgent hunger that was eagerly returned. His hands slid beneath her, cupped her ass, and then he was pistoning into her with a force Kagome could barely keep up with. So she didn’t, merely clinging to him, lost in the pleasure, in him as he sought to make her scream his name to the heavens.
Balls tightening and cock throbbing with imminent release, Inuyasha grit his teeth and forced himself to slow down, needing her right there with him as he dove into the waters of euphoria. Kagome whined in protest, tightening her thighs around him and the clenching of her walls around his shaft rent a deep, guttural groan from him. Fuck, but she was going to kill him.
“Inuyasha,” Kagome moaned and curled her hands behind his neck, dragging his mouth down to hers and licking her way inside, teeth nipping the flesh of his lips, tongue seeking his and drawing out the little pleased growls she loved.
“Stay with me,” Inuyasha whispered against her lips and Kagome’s gasp was loud in his ears as he reached down to rub her clit before delivering a series of hard, grinding thrusts, wanting his release, but needing hers more.
Kagome arched off the bed, body going taut for the second time as waves of pleasure crashed through her body, euphoric, intense, burning hot. Above her Inuyasha followed her into oblivion, her name falling from his lips on a groan as his arms wrapped tightly around her and clutched her to him as together, they plummeted through the churning waters of bliss.
It could have been mere seconds or an entire lifetime as they laid there panting for breath, slowly coming down from their mutual orgasmic high. Inuyasha didn’t care how long it was because the feeling of Kagome beneath him, the way her chest heaved against his own, heartbeat racing and her flushed skin glistening with a fine sheen of sweat, he didn’t think he had ever been happier in his entire life. He never wanted to let her go. He was more than content to keep his face pressed to her neck and listen as her heart rate gradually returned to normal, inhaling the intoxicating scent of sex and her and him.
Kagome sighed and she wiggled around, trying to get comfortable with his weight pinning her down. With a reluctant groan Inuyasha finally managed to lever himself up and off of her before plopping down heavily beside her. To his endless pleasure, his girl snuggled right back up against him. Inuyasha’s arms slipped around her and pulled her close, burying his face in her hair and holding her as tight as he dared.
God, he loved her so fucking much. It was going to kill him if she actually decided to leave.
“Okay?” he murmured after a while, his hand trailing up and down her back in a soothing caress while the other caught one of her hands and laced their fingers.
Kagome hummed in answer and pressed a kiss to his scarred chest, right above his heart.
His chest ached a little more and he clenched his jaw, squeezing his eyes shut.
Swallowing against the pain, the lump in his throat that was making it hard to breath, Inuyasha brought a hand up, gently capturing her chin to tilt her face up to his. Sleepy caramel-colored eyes stared him and her lips curved up into a warm smile. He kissed that smile, felt her content sigh as she returned it, and he lingered for as long as he could, licking, nibbling gently just to hear her soft little whimper before he pulled away with a reluctant sigh and dropped a kiss to her forehead.
“Sleep,” he told her, his voice rough with suppressed emotion. She was already half-way there, eyes closed and her breathing slowing into the deep, steady rhythm of sleep.
Inuyasha forced his gaze away from her to reach for the blanket at the end of the bed and tug it over both of them. Kagome grunted softly and burrowed deeper into the bed, turning so she was nestled against his chest with her arm thrown across his waist.
He couldn’t stop the smile from tugging his lips upward. He took a moment to brush back her hair from her face and trace the gentle swell of her cheek with the back of his finger and down the delicate line of her jaw. He chuckled softly when she pursed her lips in her sleep as he brushed the soft flesh with his thumb.
Finally with a sigh, Inuyasha gave one last kiss to her head before following her into slumber. He tugged her closer with an arm around her waist and pressed their joined hands against her chest, above her steadily beating heart that he so desperately wished was his.
-X-
When Inuyasha woke up the next morning a little after seven, it was with messy bedhead and his face shoved into a pillow, but without a warm body curled up next to him. His ears twitched atop his head, listening carefully to detect if she was anywhere nearby. When he heard nothing but birdsong outside the window, he let loose a grunt and levered himself up onto his arms.
Rolling onto his back, Inuyasha released a tongue-curling yawn and sat up in bed, one hand braced behind him while the other dragged down his face with a tired sigh. He blinked his vision into focus and despite already knowing what he’d find, he looked around his bedroom. Even so early in the morning, bright sunlight spilled onto the floor from the window, hinting at the nice weather that was forecasted for today. Clothes were strewn about the hardwood floor. Just as his gaze landed on a familiar pair of cotton shorts, he heard a short bark quickly followed by the sound of someone shushing his dog and a slow, lazy grin split his face.
He was a little surprised she was up before him. But then again, their night had been rather…eventful. His grin turned a tad smug as he swung his legs off the bed and took a moment to stretch, grunting as several satisfying pops issued from his back.
Ah, well. It had felt good to sleep in a little later than usual. However, he was curious as to why she’d left his side in his nice warm bed to venture downstairs. Maybe Jax had needed to go outside?
Well, there was only one way to find out. Getting to his feet, Inuyasha found his jeans from last night, tugged them on, and made a pit stop to the bathroom first to empty his bladder. On his way back out, he caught a glimpse of himself in the mirror, grimaced, and decided to do something about the atrocious bedhead he had going on. He noted that his jaw was starting to darken with a five o’clock shadow as well, but dismissed it and concentrated on getting his short hair into some semblance of control. It was probably time for a trim; it annoyed him when it grew past his jawline.
Giving up after a few more seconds, figuring that his baby wouldn’t give two shits about it either way, Inuyasha exited the bathroom and headed downstairs, eager to join his beloved pet and his beloved woman. He followed his nose to the kitchen and the sight that greeted him had another grin curling his lips upward. Crossing his arms, Inuyasha leaned against the kitchen doorway, amusement evident in his amber eyes.
Kagome, the little thief, had pilfered one of his t-shirts from his dresser, an old gray one that he hardly wore anymore, but fuck if it didn’t look great on her. The collar was stretched from being washed so much and a delicate shoulder was bared for his viewing pleasure as she flitted about preparing breakfast with his greedy dog at her heels. The shirt only came down to the tops of her thighs and when she reached up into the cupboard to grab some plates, it was revealed to his very appreciative gaze that his shirt was the only thing she was wearing.
He bit back a pleased growl, not yet ready to alert her to his presence. He liked seeing Kagome in his kitchen, wearing his shirt and talking to Jax as she cooked some bacon on the stove and scrambled some eggs. She was humming as she worked, a tuneless little melody as she transferred some wonderfully smelling bacon onto a plate before turning away to check on the eggs, and Inuyasha already knew what was going to happen before it even happened.
A startled gasp. Then, “Wait—no, Jax! No! Dammit—!”
Jaxson, the thieving mongrel that he was, had pushed himself onto his hindlegs when her back was turned and snatched the bacon right off the plate before making a hasty getaway beneath the table to monch his stolen treat in peace.
Kagome stared down at the empty plate and sighed. Well, she could always make more—
“I told you he’s a little thief.”
Gasping for the second time in as many minutes, Kagome spun around and spotted her lover lounging against the kitchen doorway, shirtless, arms crossed, and looking pretty goddamned delicious if you asked her. He was smirking at her, one eyebrow raised, and Kagome recalled that he had in fact warned her what felt like a lifetime ago about how the dog liked to steal his bacon.
“Inuyasha,” Kagome said by way of reply and the smile that curved her mouth was completely automatic. “Um…good morning.”
His smirk widened. “Mornin’,” he rumbled. “Now mind explaining to me why you’re in here cooking when you should still be in bed with me?”
Kagome flushed at the mental image that question created in her mind and she bit her lip, however the smile remained on her face.
“Well,” she started, suddenly feeling a little shy, which was ridiculous considering what they’d shared last night. “Since you’re always up before me making me breakfast, I thought that maybe…I could make you breakfast for a change.”
His smirk melted into a smile and he pushed away from the jamb. “Yeah?”
“Yes,” Kagome breathed, unable to move as he leisurely crossed the distance between them. “I suppose I should have taken your warning to heart and kept a better eye on a certain thieving dog.”
She cast a look at said dog, who was now sitting patiently by the table, having gotten his snack. The damn mutt stared back at her before licking his chops, unrepentant.
Kagome shook her head with a resigned sigh just as Inuyasha reached her and grasped her waist before lifting her up onto the counter. He nudged himself between her knees as his arms locked around her waist and her own slipped around his neck. Staring into his eyes, like warm, rich honey, Kagome smiled.
“Good morning,” she said once again, idly playing with the hair at the back of his neck.
“Mm,” Inuyasha grunted and leaned in to press his lips to hers in a sweet, warm kiss. Kagome hummed and happily returned it, parting her lips when he dragged his tongue across the soft flesh and releasing a breathy moan as he deepened the connection. He growled and for several moments he lost himself in her taste, pulling back only to dive in again and again. He pressed slow, drugging kisses to her lips and absolutely loved the way she nibbled at his own with a purr of contentment.
When they parted another heated minute later, Inuyasha caught her gaze, grinned, and rested his forehead against her own.
“Now,” he growled and brushed one last kiss across her swollen lips, “it’s a good morning.”
“Mmm,” Kagome hummed and cheekily smacked her lips. “Can’t argue that.”
Inuyasha chuckled and tugged her forward so he could bury his face in her neck, inhaling her sweet scent and loving how she accepted his affection without question. She racked her fingers through his hair, rubbing his ears, humming that soft melody again. It was at that moment that Inuyasha realized he wanted all of his mornings to be like this. Breakfast. Jax stealing the bacon. Morning kisses and cuddles. Hell, just existing. He wanted it all. He wanted it with her.
Forcing himself to think of something else before his mind traveled to what would happen in just a few short hours, Inuyasha sighed and reluctantly pulled away. Kagome’s hands dropped to his shoulders and fingered the star-shaped scar on his left shoulder, tracing the hardened tissue with a single finger. He was silent as she traced over his scars, watching as she reverently ran her fingers over the bigger one on his chest with a small, almost sad smile on her face. Then she leaned in, kissed first his shoulder, then his chest, right above his heart and Inuyasha was hard pressed not to drag her into a bone-crushing hug.
Clearing his throat, Inuyasha dropped a kiss to her forehead and asked in a voice huskier than he would have liked, “You really wanted to make breakfast for me?”
Draping her arms over his shoulders once more, Kagome shrugged and leveled him with another easy smile, caramel eyes open and warm and beautiful.
“Of course,” she answered matter-of-factly. “You’ve taken such great care of me, Inuyasha, and even if it’s small, I wanted to repay you somehow. So making you breakfast is my way of thanking you.” She paused. “And you’d better like it.”
Inuyasha snorted but grinned. “Yes ma’am.”
Kagome snickered and he laughed with her, loving how easy, how damn comfortable it was to be with her like this.
God, how was he ever going to give this up?
“Seriously, though,” Kagome continued a bit more somberly and he focused his attention back on her, noting that her gaze had dropped to stare at his chest. “Thank you, Inuyasha. For…for everything. For taking me in when I had nowhere to go, giving me shelter, being there for me, p-protecting me and…saving me from…”
Ears pinning into his hair as the first hint of salt reached his nose, Inuyasha quickly gathered her close once again, wrapping her in his arms and closing his eyes as she clung to him. She pressed her face to his shoulder and he could feel her tears, hot against his skin. His heart ached and he tried to soothe her as best as he could, growling low in his chest, running a hand through her hair even if he didn’t understand what had her so distraught.
“Kagome,” he murmured and nuzzled her head, slipping a hand under her hair to massage the nape of her neck. “Baby, what’s wrong? Why are you crying? C’mon, it’s alright.”
Kagome shook her head, sniffling as she tried to calm herself so she could reply.
“I d-don’t know,” she confessed, leaning back to wipe at her eyes and only crying harder when a clawed hand gently brushed hers aside to do it for her. “I—I just—you’ve come to mean so much to me, Inuyasha and I—I was so happy last night when we—I don’t want it to end—”
“Stay with me.”
Kagome froze and her eyes went wide, her lips parting on a quiet gasp.
“Wh…what?”
Her voice was barely above a whisper as she stared into his eyes. Those twin pools of deep honey gold held such a wealth of emotion that Kagome had never before seen. Her stomach flipped, her heart stuttered in her chest, and she found herself holding her breath.
For a long moment Inuyasha was silent, simply staring at her with an impossibly soft expression as he tenderly tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. His claws grazed her jaw, traced it to her chin where he brushed his fingers against the softness of her lips. Her lips trembled and he released a ragged sigh, shifting his hand to cup her face before locking gazes with her.
“For five years I lived alone,” Inuyasha began, voice rough, “with only a dog and my own thoughts for company. The first one was spent working until I was too exhausted to do anything but sleep, but as the weeks turned into months, and months into years, it got better. Jaxson helped, and when Sesshomaru showed up with Rain, it was just something else to keep me busy. So I didn’t complain.”
He paused and grabbed her hand, entwining their fingers and pressing them to his chest right above his heart. Kagome bit her lip to keep it from trembling and waited for him to continue, heart in her throat.
“Then one night,” he said and the corner of his lips twitched upward, “while taking the backway home from work, I came across this scared little thing being harassed by a couple of assholes. I took her home with me, and I don’t think she realizes that she changed my life for the better.”
Kagome gasped, about to object, but a clawed finger gently pressing against her lips prevented her from speaking.
“Kagome, having you around made me realize what a shut-in I’ve become,” Inuyasha told her, brow furrowing into a slight, thoughtful frown. “When I wasn’t at work, I was at home, always doing something to keep myself busy, whether it was outside work, household chores, or making a damn grocery list. I never went anywhere and it’s a miracle Miroku has tolerated me for all these years. But then suddenly you’re here and for the first time I find myself not wanting to do anything, pushing work aside just so I can be with you.”
“Inuyasha,” Kagome whispered, more tears welling in her eyes. He cupped her face with both hands now, honeyed eyes warm, earnest, and filled with something that made her heart do double time in her chest.
“I was lonely,” he admitted thickly, sweeping his thumbs across her cheeks. “I was too damned stubborn to admit that before, but having you around, Kagome…it healed me, far more than a dog, or even time itself ever could.”
Swallowing the lump in his throat, Inuyasha once more leaned his forehead against her own, staring into her eyes, willing her to understand the depth of his feelings. He wanted to tell her, but knew it wasn’t the right time. He didn’t want her to think he was saying all of that just to keep her here with him. Maybe one day he’d be able to tell her. But right now…there was only one thing he needed her to understand.
“What I’m trying to say,” he rasped, heart pounding in his chest from a combination of nerves and anticipation, “is that I may have rescued you from two drunken idiots and your psychotic ex-boyfriend, but Kagome, you also rescued me. You saved me from myself, baby, and I…”
Inuyasha sighed and his crooked grin surprised her.
“You know what a greedy, possessive bastard I am. I don’t wanna let you go.”
The sound that erupted from Kagome’s throat was half-sob, half-laugh as the tears spilled from her eyes, cascading down her cheeks. Clawed fingers patiently wiped them away and his grin melted into a genuine smile, the one he reserved for her and only her.
“So I’ll say it again,” he whispered and brushed a whisper-soft kiss against her lips. “And I want you to know that I am not above begging to get what I want.”
Pulling back, but still staying close enough so his nose brushed against hers, Inuyasha released a shaky breath and briefly closed his eyes. Then he opened them to stare directly into eyes the color of melted caramel, bright with her tears, swimming with emotion, and gazing at him with cautious hope.
“Kagome,” he murmured and her breath hitched. “Stay with me. Please.”
She didn’t even have to think about it. All day yesterday she had been dreading the moment when her mother would arrive to take her away. Before even that, she’d regretted letting her mom find an apartment for her. Because, god, she didn’t want to leave. Inuyasha had come to mean so much to her now. He’d become someone who was such a constant in her life for the past month, and she was loath to give that up. That feeling of security, of safety she always felt when she was with him had become so familiar and comfortable that she couldn’t even imagine what life would be like without him nearby. She didn’t want to imagine it.
Suddenly having that constant taken away from her, not being able to see his cocky grin, hear his husky chuckle, listen to him play and roughhouse with Jax…she didn’t think she’d be able to bear it.
With a sob borne of both her relief and utter joy, Kagome launched herself at him, wrapping her arms around his neck. She loved the way he automatically held her against him, his arms strong and warm around her waist.
“Yes,” she cried, smiling so wide she was sure he could feel it with her face pressed against his shoulder as it was. “God, yes, I want to stay, Inuyasha. I want to stay with you.”
The breath abruptly left his lungs in a relieved whoosh of air and Inuyasha crushed her to him, his body trembling from the force of his relief. Kagome clung to him just as tightly, her tears soaking his neck but he didn’t care. Inuyasha didn’t care about anything except for her, this amazing, beautiful woman that had wormed her way into his heart. And he was more than happy to let her stay there forever.
Overcome with a need so fierce he couldn’t possibly deny it, Inuyasha pulled away, grabbed her face, and kissed her over and over again, hard, desperate presses of his lips against her own, a wordless tell of his utter relief, his happiness that she wasn’t leaving. Kagome kissed him back just as urgently, tangling her fingers in his hair, the wide smile on her face a silent giveaway of her own intense elation.
Inuyasha felt that smile and he couldn’t have held back the grin that spread across his face even if he tried. Kagome laughed, a breathy puff of air that was answered by his husky chuckle. As small hands shifted to lovingly frame his face, the urgency slowly faded and gentled into lingering, lazy kisses. Inuyasha’s low growls of contentment were tempered by her soft sighs and when he caught one of her hands to press against his chest, Kagome instinctively knew what he was trying to tell her.
That while physically he may still be scarred, a constant reminder of the pain he had endured, the heart that lay beneath the scored flesh had healed all because of her, and he would be forever grateful to her for it.
Another sob-laugh escaped her and she sought to kiss away the last of his pain while he tenderly stroked the unblemished skin of her jaw. So absorbed with each other, neither of them noticed that a certain canine had taken full advantage of their newfound happiness to rise up onto his legs and find his own happiness by scarfing down the remainder of the bacon and eggs forgotten on the stove.