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Pizza Night

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“Hhaaahh - aaahhh- aaahhh- KakaaAAASHI!”

Tenzo breathed heavily, feeling his heartbeat racing and his arms wobbling slightly as he struggled to support his own weight in his orgasm-induced high. He opened his eyes and looked down at his lover below him, silver hair splayed out messily on the pillow, chest heaving as he too struggled to catch his breath.

It was a sight Tenzo had seen hundreds of times before, but it never ceased to amaze him how beautiful his husband was. His usually pale white skin was flushed slightly with a post-coital glow, his lips shiny and kiss bruised. The sight was almost enough to make Tenzo ready to start all over again.

Knock! Knock! Knock!

Tenzo furrowed his brow.

“Who the hell is that?!” he demanded. Kakashi chuckled.

“Calm down, lover boy,” he said. “It’s just the pizza.” Tenzo shook his head in confusion.

“The pizza?” he said. “What pizza?” Kakashi pushed some of his white hair off of his sticky forehead.

“The pizza I ordered,” he said. “I figured we’d be hungry.” Tenzo laughed.

“I am kind of hungry,” he admitted. “You gonna get it?” Kakashi whined.

“You get it,” he said. “I can’t walk. You fucked me too good.” Tenzo groaned, fully aware that Kakashi was just sweet talking him into doing what he wanted. But the promise of pizza was too much to resist, so he got up.

“When did you even have time to order it?” he asked, pulling on his underwear.

“Before we started,” Kakashi said. “I know how long we take.” Tenzo chuckled.

“Well, I might have to switch it up and make it more interesting next time if we’ve gotten to a point where you know exactly when to order a pizza to have it delivered right when we finish,” he said. Kakashi rolled onto his side and propped his head up on his hand.

“Mmmm, I like the sound of that,” he said. “Maybe after we finish this piz - are you putting your wedding ring on just to answer the door?” Tenzo shot him a sheepish glance as he shoved the gold band onto his finger.

“What,” he said. “I don’t want the delivery guy to think I’m a slut.” Kakashi’s laughter followed Tenzo out into the hallway and to the front door. He grabbed his wallet off the front table and opened the door while flipping through the bills.

“How much do I owe you - “

His question was cut short by two terrified gasps from the doorway. He jerked his head up to see Sakura, Sai, and Naruto standing in the doorway. All four of them stared at each other in horrified silence for a moment.

“AAAAHHHHH!” Sakura, Naruto, and Tenzo screamed in unison.

“Hi Yamato-taicho,” Sai said. “We’re looking for the Hokage. Is he here?” Sai’s question was promptly ignored by everyone else present.

“Yamato-taicho! What are you doing at Kakashi-sensei’s apartment!?” Naruto screamed.

“In your UNDERWEAR?!” Sakura bellowed. Tenzo looked down at his boxer briefs, which had seemed more than sufficient for the pizza delivery man but now seemed to Tenzo like they had shrunk five sizes since he put them on. He couldn’t imagine what he was thinking answering the door in something so tiny.

“What are you guys doing here?!” he demanded, finally finding his words.

“We’re looking for the Hokage,” Sai repeated, clearly unaffected by the scene unfolding in front of him.

“Are you and Kakashi-sensei dating?!” Naruto asked, ignoring Tenzo’s question. Sakura gasped and let out a squeak before he could answer.

“Oh my god, he’s wearing a wedding ring!” she yelled. “They’re married!!!” Tenzo ripped off his wedding ring.

“What, no we’re not!” he yelled, tossing the ring over his shoulder. “I’m just a slut!” He winced as the ring fell to the floor behind him with a tink .

“That’s true, you are a slut.” Tenzo turned to see Kakashi, fully dressed of course, standing in the hallway. He bent over and picked up Tenzo’s wedding ring, then sauntered over to the doorway and lifted up Tenzo’s hand. Slowly, without breaking eye contact with Tenzo, he slid his wedding ring back on his finger. “Why are you here?” Tenzo gulped.

“I live here,” he said. Kakashi chuckled.

“Not you, dork,” he said. “Them.” He gestured to the kids in the doorway, whom Tenzo had completely forgotten about when Kakashi put his ring back on. He felt his face flush with renewed humiliation.

“We were going to dinner and passed by your apartment,” Sakura said. “We thought you might want to join us.”

“Well isn’t that sweet,” Kakashi said, his eyes crinkled in a hidden grin. “Aren’t they sweet, Tenzo?” Tenzo crossed his arms over his very bare chest and glared at Kakashi.

“Simply adorable,” he gritted. “Nice to see you managed to get up. I thought you couldn’t walk.” Kakashi chuckled as Sakura and Naruto groaned in disgust.

“I did not want to know that,” Sakura said.

“Well, as much as we’d love to go to dinner with you guys, we have a pizza on the way,” Kakashi said. “Thanks for stopping by.” He reached over Tenzo to close the door.

“Wait, Kakashi-sensei!” Naruto yelled, catching the door with his foot. “You can’t just drop a bombshell like that and then expect us to walk away!”

“Oh, I believe I can do exactly that,” Kakashi said, kicking Naruto’s foot out of the way. As soon as the door clicked shut, Naruto started knocking on it relentlessly.

“Sensei!!! Open up!” he yelled. “How long have you and Yamato-taicho been married??!!” Kakashi and Tenzo shot each other panicked glances as they realized Naruto was about to yell their secret to the whole of Konoha. Kakashi ripped the door back open.

“Shut up, Naruto!” he hissed. Naruto winced back in fear.

“Don’t go telling everyone about this!” Tenzo added.

“Why not?” Sai asked. “I read that it’s traditional to openly share your love for your spouse with your friends and family.”

“Yeah,” Sakura said, for once agreeing with Sai’s comment. “Are we not your friends? Why didn’t you tell us?” Tenzo groaned and heard Kakashi sigh beside him.

“We didn’t tell anyone,” Kakashi said. “We eloped.”

“Kakashi is the Hokage now,” Tenzo said. “His personal life becomes very public when people find out about things like this. We just want to keep it low key. So, we’d really appreciate it if you guys didn’t go telling everyone. Please.” The three kids stared at him with somber expressions until Naruto started cracking up.

“I’m sorry, Yamato-taicho,” he said, laughing. “But it’s really hard to take you seriously when you’re in your underwear.” Tenzo sighed and put his face in his hands as he heard Sakura and Kakashi join in the laughter.

“Uh… pizza delivery for Hatake Kakashi?” Everyone turned to see a very confused and slightly horrified looking pizza delivery boy standing off to the side of the doorway.

“That would be me,” Kakashi said, picking Tenzo’s wallet up off the ground where it had fallen at the beginning of this whole debacle and side stepping Naruto and Sakura to get to the pizza. He handed the delivery boy the cash and took the pizza. “Keep the change.”

“Thanks,” the boy said before turning to look at Tenzo. “And uh, just thought you should know, man. You don’t have any clothes on.” Tenzo closed his eyes and felt his face get redder and redder as he silently wished a meteorite would fall to the ground and obliterate all life, removing him from this awkward situation.

“I’m going to get dressed,” he said, stomping off towards his and Kakashi’s bedroom.

“Finally,” Sakura mumbled. While getting dressed in the bedroom, Tenzo heard the front door of the apartment close and mentally thanked his husband for shooing away the team. He threw on shorts and a t-shirt and emerged into the hallway.

“Thanks for getting rid of them, babe,” he said. “That was sufficiently - THEY’RE STILL HERE?!” Kakashi gave him an apologetic glance from the dining table where he was seated with the three kids.

“They wanted to have dinner with us,” he said. “How could I turn them down?”

“We have one pizza and five people!” Tenzo yelled. Sakura giggled.

“You called him ‘babe,’” she said. Tenzo shook his head.

“This is a nightmare,” he said. “This is my nightmare.”

“Come here, Tenz,” Kakashi said. “The secret’s out. We might as well enjoy being able to have a normal dinner with the kids for once.” Tenzo sighed but walked over to sit next to Kakashi, grabbing a slice of pizza.

“So, what do you all want to know?” he asked reluctantly.

He and Kakashi spent the next half an hour explaining their entire relationship to the kids - that they had been dating for about ten years but only married for six months. That the only people who knew were Gai and Tsunade. That it was Kakashi who asked Tenzo to marry him. That they had been keeping their relationship a secret all these years because they didn’t want to have people up in their personal business. Well, Kakashi didn’t want to have people up in his personal business. Tenzo just went along with it for Kakashi’s sake.

“You could’ve told us, ” Sakura said, once they had finished their story and the pizza. Kakashi shrugged.

“Probably,” he said. “But it was more fun this way.” Tenzo sighed, exasperated.

“Maybe for you, ” he said. “You weren’t the one who just came out to your students in your underwear.” Kakashi chuckled.

“No, I was the one who got to enjoy that show,” he said. Sakura and Naruto burst into a fit of giggles.

“Aright well, dinner’s over,” Tenzo said, ready for the night of awkwardness to end. “Any last questions before I send you all away and give my very annoying husband a piece of my mind?” Naruto and Sakura shook their heads.

“I have a question, Yamato-senpai,” Sai said. Tenzo sighed.

“Yes, Sai?” he prompted.

“Were you engaging in sexual intercourse when we arrived -  “ Tenzo slammed his fist on the table to interrupt Sai’s question.

“Ooookay!” he yelled. “Out!” He ushered the two scared and one very confused teens to the front door and practically kicked them out, slamming the door behind them. He turned around and shook his head at Kakashi.

“That went well,” Kakashi said. Tenzo scoffed.

“If by ‘well’ you mean ‘as badly as possible,’ then I agree,” he said. Kakashi chuckled and walked over to Tenzo, snaking his arms around his waist and kissing the tip of his nose.

“You did well,” he said. Tenzo blushed.

“Thanks,” he said. Kakashi smirked.

“Now, if I recall correctly, you were going to switch things up and make it interesting, correct?” he said. Tenzo smiled and dragged his husband by the hand back into the bedroom.

“I suppose I do need to punish you after tonight.”