"Am I going insane?"
Ignis' eyes narrowed in thought "Gladio, are you afflicted with something?"
Gladiolus snorted "yeah, it's called "Big Brother Instinct" and it's driving me crazy!"
"Excuse me? My apologies Gladio, but you need to explain more in depth. I have no idea what you're talking about…"
Ever since Iris and that Ravus guy got teleported together, things have been different! I can't be the only one that notices!"
Ignis stroked his chin in thought "I suppose they could have gotten friendlier during their time away from us. They did end up in the Cleigne, far from any of us and had to spend a night there. We both know how harsh and unforgiving the evening temperatures could be. By working together, they have become fire forged friends."
Gladio scoffed "That sounds fucking fine and dandy in whatever stupid fantasy land you live in but I know how guys are. I fucking know that princely prettyboy is setting his sights on Iris."
Ignis chuckled at Gladiolus' paranoia "Is it because of Iris' unrequited crush on Noctis? Oh, come now, that's absurd!"
"Is it? Come on dude. She was in love with a prince for most of her life, maybe that's her type?"
"Relax Gladio, aside from "being royalty" there aren't much similarities between Noctis and Ravus don't have much in common. Noctis has jet black hair and is quite slim. He actually looks quite like someone from a boyband. It's no wonder why he had so much attention from the girls in his various schools…."
Gladio smirked "Like eighty percent of that is because he's royalty. I don't think any girl would want him once they find out how much of a lazy slob he is. Well, aside from Iris..."
Ignis continued "Then we have Ravus. Tall, muscular, ashen blonde hair with sharp features. The ying to Noctis' yang, one might say."
Gladio ran his hands through is hair "Yeah...Ravus is also, dutiful, strategic, and a pretty damn good fighter to boot…"
Ignis grunted in amusement "Sounds to me that you're coming around to him"
"Yeah right...but if it was a choice between Noctis and Ravus…"
"Two weeks ago, you swore that Ravus couldn't be trusted."
"Yeah, but did you see those arms? I'm gonna have to arm wrestle him one of these days."
"Is that how he would "prove" himself of his worth?"
"Nah, man...I just want to know if he's all hype."
"And once he beats you, you shall present your sister as a gift?" Ignis quipped sarcastically
"Come on dude, I'm not like that I just want to test the dude!"
"I'm merely kidding, Gladio. Though a test of might between you two does seem like an interesting spectacle. It might determine who I would rather have as my partner the next time we separate during missions…"
Gladio roughly slapped him on his back "You're the worst!"
The bar in Lestallum was a frequent hangout for the gang. They made quite a name for themselves as hunters and Imperial killers. Despite the fact that they were semi-famous, Lestallum's geographical superiority made attacks from the Empire an almost impossible task.
Ignis took a sip of his coffee while listening to Cindy talk about some advanced designs for Ravus' new arm
"So, this one could generate a huge bolt of electricity!" Cindy bragged "I got it to work when you gave me some chipped off pieces of Ramuh's staff, Iggy! I thank the Gods every day for that because I can't just buy Astral material!"
"I'll make sure to look for more scraps the next time we summon a God…"
Cindy laughed and lightly smacked Ignis on the shoulders "Aren't you a sarcastic little devil?"
Their banter was interrupted by Noctis
"Good evening, your majesty…"
"Do you guys think that Iris is acting different lately?"
Ignis and Cindy glanced at each other before turning to Noctis
Ignis tapped a finger to his chin "I haven't noticed anything out of the ordinary, Noct…"
Cindy shook her "Nope, Me neither. Is she acting weird to you?"
"Well...yeah...It's like her crush on me vanished! Usually she trips over her words, acts coy, and suggests doing stuff together. Now she talks to me like I'm one of you guys!"
Ignis took another sip of his orange juice "That's wonderful. Now you can focus all of your efforts on Lady Lunafreya…"
Noctis growled "Not, this isn't "wonderful", it sucks!"
"What do you mean, Noctis? I thought Lunafreya was the women of your dreams. You told me when you were younger that you couldn't wait to meet her and that you were tired of Iris "annoying" you. What more could you want?"
"I was a dumbass eight-year-old! Luna is as interesting as a bag of rocks! She keeps sending me letters despite the fact that we both have cellphones! It takes two minutes for a text to show up and two freakin' months for Umbra to show up with a letter from her. And once I do, all she talks about is goddamn stickers! At least Iris is interesting!"
Cindy clicked her tongue and shook her head "So you spend so much time ignoring her and now that she's moved on, you're suddenly interested? Men…"
Noctis was about to refute her logic before Gladio showed up at the counter of the bar; rubbing the sore muscles of his arm
"What the hell happened to you?" Noctis asked
"Arm wrestling with Ravus. Holy shit, that guy actually beat me!" Gladio panted
Ignis raised an eyebrow "He actually bested you? The only person that could do that was your father…"
"Yup...Didn't go down easy though. Really fucked his arm up…"
Cindy punched his shoulder "You big lunkhead! He only got the one good one!"
Gladio chuckled "Relax Cindy, I bet he's pretty content. Iris took him to the hotel room to get him "patched up" If you know what I mean…"
Ignis sighed "Unfortunately, we always know what you mean"
Noctis' eyes widened in horror "What the hell are you talking about, Gladio?!"
Gladio chuckled "Come on Noctis, you can't be this clueless…"
"Are you saying what- Oh My God! Iris and Ravus?! What the fuck, Gladio? Are you really going to let your little sister do that? Aren't older brothers supposed to prevent that?!"
Iida grabbed Noctis by the collar with his uninjured hand "Listen you nerd- Don't ever question my effectiveness as an older brother. Iris is old enough to know what she is doing. Both of them are smart, and you're only worried because Iris doesn't like you anymore. You had a whole lifetime to acknowledge her but you were so fixated on Luna." Gladio roughly pushed him away
Noctis got up off the ground "First of all- I'm just worried about Iris' safety. No matter how friendly Ravus has been to us, he's still an imperial and was a part of the invasion of Insomnia. I'm going to go investigate the hotel we're at to make sure that Ravus isn't killing Iris as we speak!"
"I really don't think you want to do that, Noct" Gladio said. It was too late though, Noctis was already halfway out the door.
"Should me stop him?" Cindy asked
Gladiolus thought about it for a moment "Nah, serves that dumbass right. He's either gonna get his ass kicked by Iris, get his ass kicked by Ravus, or both. I say we buy another round of drinks!"
Noctis went into the hotel and felt an odd shiver. That was his instinct telling him something was wrong. As he got closer to Iris' room, he heard a lot of noise and some yelling. This was it- he was about to walk into a brutal murder scene. Noctis readied his engine blade in one hand and a phoenix down in another and kicked the door open
He was greeted by the sight of a topless Iris, her pale skin covered in sweat and glowing in the dim light of the hotel room. Her surprisingly large breasts were capped with pink areolas and were bouncing freely as she rode Ravus, who was just as naked.
The two of them were so into it that they failed to notice Noctis' presence. Iris's screams of "Oh Gods fuck me!" combined with Ravus' grunts of exertion were burned in his mind.
He ran away and hid in his room.
Prompto whistled as he walked in the lobby of the hotel. He had spent all night photographing Lestallum at night for an expose of the night life of the city for Vyv. he wondering what they had all done without.
"Hopefully nothing too crazy" He murmured to himself
Once he got to the lobby, his jaw fell opened. A good majority of his friends were there, sitting around like always but Prompto knew something was "off"
"What the hell happened here?!"
Iris' head was on Ravus' shoulder as the former imperial general smiled contently
Gladio was laughing his ass off right next to Ravus and Iris while Noctis was curled up in the fetal position on the floor.
Cindy was fiddling with more schematics and Prompto turned to Ignis for an answer