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Letting Go?

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How did everything fall apart so quickly? Everything had been perfect, Oliver was happy and so was Jona, but the rumours flying around on the internet saying that Jordan was there to replace Jona had ruined everything. Now, Jona was getting packed to return to Australia, Oliver didn't know what to say anymore. Of course he wanted Jona to stay by his side, but that seemed so completely out of reach. Like Oliver was stuck in an endless dream.

He looked at the time, Jona's flight would be departing soon and Oliver was sat at home, feeling completely sorry for himself, unable to do anything. Oliver pulled out his phone, playing with it for a moment before deciding to call Jona; he chewed his finger while the line rang, hoping to get through. When the voicemail message sounded, Oliver's heart shattered, "Come back. I need you." It was true, Oliver wasn't sure if he could cope without Jona. Oliver dropped his phone with a sigh and laid back on the couch, staring blankly at the ceiling. What had he done? How could Oliver let Jona leave like this? He should have fought tooth and nail to make him stay, fix whatever issues there was. Even if Jona wasn't going to be a part of the band any longer, surely Oliver could find time for their relationship and instead, he let it all go like it was nothing.


Jona stared out of the airplane window, thinking about Oliver; he'd looked at his turned-off phone ten times while he'd been waiting for his flight, so tempted to turn it on and call Oliver. He didn't want to be in the band any longer, but he wanted to be with Oliver more than anything else in the world. How could he take back what he'd said? He'd been so cruel. Oliver surely wouldn't forgive him; he remembered what happened like it was two seconds ago...

"I'm leaving. You guys have Jordan now and he's a better fit. You know it too, Oli," Jona rubbed a hand over his face, he needed to get out, "I can't juggle two bands any longer either. They need me more than you do." It had been a stab, he could tell that by Oliver's face.

"The band still won't be the same without you," Oliver looked so desperate, clearly wanting to say more as he grasped at Jona's arm, "What are you going to do?"

Jona had sighed, lost and confused; he wanted to stay by Oliver but the band would always pull him away, "I know how important this is to you. I'm going back to Australia, I can't be around something I'm losing. I know none of you are telling me to leave, it's my decision to go back. I wouldn't hold you down, I know that you love this more than anything," Oliver's mouth opened, then closed, brows furrowing, "You do. I know you do and it's fine, I wouldn't ask you to choose me over the band. I just need some head-space for now. It'll be good for the both of us."

Jona still felt those words in his mouth, stinging like a sickness. He knew Oliver loved him. Yet he'd so cruelly said that the band was more important, his biggest love in life. Jona felt like he could never stand in the way of that, maybe it was only half-true; Oliver loved his band, of course and he would keep going, tour the world that he loved. Jona would be forgotten about, merely a small light in Oliver's busy life; he wished that was easy to change. He closed his eyes and settled back, trying to ignore the well in his stomach as the flight took off.

Once he landed in Adelaide, he lazily got his baggage and started to head out for a cab; he pulled out his phone, turning it back on. He was a little shocked to see a voicemail waiting, he decided to listen to it, breathing heavily at the clear loss in Oliver's voice, "Come back. I need you." That was all he left and Jona felt completely wiped out, he gripped at his phone, barely able to move his fingers to call a cab. He wanted to phone Oliver back, but he didn't have the energy to talk right now, Jona felt so weak, he wanted to run all the way back into Oliver's arms. Jona's cab showed up at that moment, he dumped his luggage into the boot then clambered into the back and rattled off his address, settling back as the journey began, it was about ten minutes to his house.

When he got home, he paid for the cab, grabbed his stuff and headed inside, leaving his things in the hallway. Jona walked into the lounge and dropped onto the sofa, needing just a moment to relax before he decided to phone Oliver back. He still fiddled with his phone before dialling the number, placing his phone to his ear while it rang, when it connected, Jona was sure he held his breath, "Jona. A--are you...Back? How was the flight?"

"Long and boring. Slept through most of it. I've just got home, it's two-thirty in the morning." The twenty-hour flight had taken up most of the day; Jona didn't feel tired any longer though.

"I barely slept last night, I needed to hear from you. It's four-pm here, Nicholls is dragging me out for food soon."

God, Oliver knew exactly how to drive Jona insane, "Well, I'm fine. What did you need?" He was being blunt, but his mouth was beginning to go dry. Oliver was about to drag him right back, where he belonged. Jona's real home: Oliver's arms.

"I miss you already. I should have stopped you...The band is important to me and I know yours is too. But you mean more to me than that ever could, I need you here. I--" A pause, a soft sigh that made Jona sit up, gripping the sofa like it held him there, "I need you. I love you. Please," Oh, how could he say no? Oliver sounded so desperate, clearly begging for everything to be okay. But Jona didn't know how he could work this around everything that was going on, "I'll break up the band and come there if I need to. Jona--"

"You can't do that," Jona knew that interrupting was rude, he didn't want Oliver to regret anything, "I'll speak to the guys. Okay? Wait for me. Oli, I love you too. I'm gonna get some more sleep, okay?" Oliver muttered out a goodbye, soft and almost broken; Jona hung up the call and put his phone down on the coffee table. First thing was that he needed a nap, before he sorted anything, the guys would be asleep at this time anyway; Jona trudged upstairs and flopped onto his bed. Everything had been the way it was when he left last and he was grateful to have everything ready just so he could sleep.


Oliver still felt tired when he woke, he checked his phone, heart hammering when he saw a few messages from Jona, 'Everything is sorted. I'll text you when I'm on the plane.' The second one was from half an hour ago, 'On my way, twenty-hours baby, I'll be there. I'll text again when I land.' The wait would be agonising, but the band were busy working on a new music video for their upcoming album, putting together ideas so they could have it out, hopefully late-February or early-March. Oliver hoped it would be enough to keep his mind distracted as he waited for Jona.

A knock on the door distracted him and he went to answer it, blinking when Jordan stood there, "Hey, I came to check on you," Oliver let him in, closing the door and heading back into the lounge, "How are you?"

"I'm fine. I swear, you guys don't need to keep checking up on me," They sat down together on the couch and Jordan looked at Oliver, checking him over, "What? I'm fine! You worry too much."

Jordan shrugged, but it was true, he cared for Oliver more than he'd ever cared for anyone before; having seen him so upset the last couple of days had made his heart ache; it was probably far too soon to say anything about how he felt, but he wanted to make Oliver happy. Without thinking too much on it, he leaned over and kissed Oliver; Oliver sat there stunned, pressing his hands quickly against Jordan's shoulders and pushing him back, "I'm sorry," The apology came quickly, Oliver pulled his hands away, resting them on his lap, "I want you to be happy. What Jona said to you--"

"That's none of your business. I know why he said what he did, but he's on his way back now," Oliver shuffled away from Jordan, feeling a little uncomfortable, "You're a really good friend Jordan, but that's all. I love Jona, that'll never change."

Jordan nodded slowly, he felt like he just caused a massive dent in their friendship, "I am really sorry, I shouldn't have done that. I was being selfish. Forgive me?" Oliver smiled softly, nodding, "I'll get going. Let me know when he's back okay? I want to apologise to him too." Oliver nodded again and Jordan took his leave; he felt a little strange, he had no idea that Jordan was interested in him, he'd always been so caught up with Jona and himself, how was he ever going to notice? Oliver didn't feel guilty though, for pushing Jordan away, he'd never betray Jona's trust, once he was back, everything would be fine.


Every time a new person appeared at the top of the escalator, Oliver perked up in his seat, sinking back down when he noticed it wasn't the person he wanted to see; when Jona finally appeared, he stood up, heart soaring. Jona looked impatient too, seeing if there was a way to get around the people in front of him, when he realised it was hopeless, he waited and once he was free, he ran straight to Oliver, embracing him, "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have left like that, I--" Oliver kissed him, silencing the rest of his words, Jona held tight to Oliver. They drew away for breath and Jona smiled, "I love you. I'll never leave you again."

"I love you too. How did it go with your band?"

"They were fine, we're going to start working based in London. I can be with you, whenever you want," Oliver smiled at Jona's words, embracing him tightly; Jona held on, pressing his face into Oliver's shoulder, "I'm sorry for what I said too."

"It's okay," Oliver's voice was quiet, soft as he spoke, "I understand why. I can't believe you've spent forty hours on a plane, you must be exhausted."

Jona nodded, they broke their embrace and headed over to the baggage claim, hand-in-hand, "At least it wasn't consecutive. I napped when I got to Australia, spoke with the guys, then I was back out over here. But it feels like I haven't see you in a year. I missed you," They grabbed Jona's bags, and headed out; Oliver managed to park somewhere decent; they loaded up the boot and jumped into the car together. Jona held Oliver's hand before they set-off, "Oli, don't ever let me leave again."

"No. I won't let you go," Oliver squeezed Jona's hand, he leaned over and kissed Jona again, holding him there, just to enjoy the moment; remember he had them back. Oliver was being honest, he wouldn't let go, never again. They pulled apart and Oliver smiled, "Come on, you can have a nap at my place." Jona smiled too; they both pulled on their seat-belts and Oliver pulled out of the car park. He was glad to see the back of the airport, now he could spend some quality time with Jona and enjoy his happiness...He wouldn't let that slip away again.