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“I hope you like The Butterfly Effect two.” Kirby laughed nervously, popping open the DVD case for said movie.

Ryan— er, Billy, as he apparently preferred to be called— cocked his head. “Duck?” His voice was more like a bleat.

The two were in the break room of the Cryptonomica after Ned and his friends dropped by. His boss told him to show Billy— the new employee who looked startlingly like his favorite movie star— a movie to keep him entertained.

He happily obliged, because since Billy arrived, he was a wreck. Nervously looking at his handsome new coworker whenever he was preoccupied with something else, watching him do odd things like putting random objects in his mouth. Kirby naturally assumed he wasn’t actually Ryan Gosling, but his heart still fluttered every time he saw his attractive face. He had been waiting to talk to him for weeks.

Butnow that he was, it was kind of weird.

”No,” Kirby squinted. “It’s Kirby. My name’s Kirby.”


”I—“ he shrugged, then turned back to the DVD case. “Never mind. Ned told me you weren’t doing too hot. Or, this is one big prank, and you’re just a Ryan Gosling look-alike Ned rented to mess with me.” Kirby scoffed. He wouldn’t put it past him.

Billy squinted in confusion when Kirby said ‘Ryan Gosling’.

Kirby, seeing this, raised his eyebrows. “Ryan Gosling? Movie star? International heartthrob?”

Confusion still.

He set down the DVD case and plucked another one off of a nearby shelf. “Here, I have one of his movies— it’s the Notebook. I always cry at it.” He flinched. “Don’t tell Ned.”

Billy just eyed the picture on the case, and then his eyes widened. He stared at the picture of Ryan Gosling, smiling, on the box and pointed at it.

”Pizza!” He exclaimed excitedly, bouncing in his seat. “Pizza!”

Kirby assumed he was saying “that’s me!” In his own little language. Kirby grinned widely, feeling like he was in the presence of an excited child. “Yeah! Pizza! That’s you!”

Billy looked down at Kirby now— he was significantly taller— with an open mouthed smile. “Pizza!”

”Hell yeah! Pizza!”

Kirby popped the DVD in the player, smiling widely, and placed an order to Dominoes for a pizza.

Every time Ryan appeared on screen; Billy would bounce and bleat once more. He eventually picked up that you weren’t supposed to talk during movies, and would instead whisper “Pizza” gently to Kirby, placing a hand on his arm.

Kirby would nod through a mouthful of his dinner, face turning red whenever the two made contact.

Eventually, Billy fell asleep. Gently, Kirby placed a blanket over his body, and stared at him for a moment. He picked up the pizza box, turned off the TV, and went home, heart warm.