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Midnight Fantasies

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Spock did not dream often. A phenomena that he hypothesized was due to extensive Vulcan meditation. Much time was spent then to reorganize his brain, and to make sense of the emotions experienced during the day. His mind simply would not have much to draw upon for material when his eyes finally closed for the night. A dream was a sign that there was something he had missed during meditation. Thus he always knew when he was in a dream, and typically he could determine the purpose shortly after the dream began.

He was in the sonic, except the water was on. Which was in of itself a particular activity for Spock to engage in. A sonic was perfectly capable of removing any contamination without the necessity of toweling down after. The temperature was hot enough to turn a human’s skin red. Perfectly adequate for a Vulcan.

He heard the click of the bathroom door; Kirk’s side. Spock turned to look at Kirk through the glass pane of the sonic. He was naked aside from a towel wrapped around his waist. Why he came from his own room with a towel to the bathroom rather than the other way around Spock did not know. His hair was dry and so was his skin, suggesting that he had not engaged in a shower of his own.

Spock knew that Kirk favored the water option when showering, and did so as often as he could manage. His Vulcan hearing picked up on the pattering of water on many nights. Kirk would only sonic if he hadn’t the time to opt for the water. Further puzzling Spock as to why he was in such a state of disrobe. He had no reason to be without clothing, yet here he was. Naked.

He smiled when he met Spock’s eyes. Dream Spock did not react strangely to this situation. In fact it appeared as though he were going to treat it as if it were routine. Kirk stepped forward, one hand holding his towel around his waist. The other hand reached out to the sonic door lock. The glass pane between him and Kirk slid aside with a soft ‘woosh’ sound. Spock found that the action caused a strange jolt inside him. Something not unlike surprise. Which was yet another thing that was illogical about the situation. Spock knew that touching the pad would open the sonic door, but faced with the reality of Kirk a step away and a towel away from nudity something sparked.

“Hey,” Kirk’s voice was low, unlike how he talked to Spock even off duty. He recognized this voice, however, as the voice Kirk often employed when seducing women. He chuckled at Spock’s lack of a response and reached out to touch Spock’s bare skin. Spock jolted in his mind. He had to move or he would be exposed to Kirk’s emotions through his skin, but dream Spock stood resolutely where he was. In fact he moved inwards toward Kirk.

“Ouch,” Kirk pulled his hand back after making contact with the water. “That is scorching Mr. Spock. Likely doesn’t feel that way for yourself.” The intonation of ‘Mr. Spock’ with that voice was peculiar. He couldn’t quite place the reason it made his insides roll. “Turn it down a little, baby. Let me step in.” Kirk flashed another bright smile and Spock found he was reaching for the temperature controls immediately.

He wanted Kirk to step in.

Kirk watched as Spock turned down the temperature and then tested the water with his free hand. He gave a slight nod, “Still a bit high for my taste, but the risk in this case is worth the reward. It’ll do.” In a blink Kirk released the towel in his other hand and he was exposed. Spock’s eyes followed the towel as it fell to Kirk’s feet and lingered there. He had never seen Kirk naked. Why would his mind unconsciously conjure up an image from which it had no accurate example to draw upon? It made no sense to Spock.

Then Kirk stepped into the enclosed space of the sonic. Spock’s breath hitched and his heart leapt. His captain did not stop there either. Once inside he smoothly closed the rest of the distance between them until he was lined up against Spock’s side. He was overwhelmed immediately with an intensely human emotion. Lust. He had experienced it vaguely once before in the throws of Pon Farr. Those memories are only a fuzz to him, and he has done his best to hide away anything he remembers of the act. They are not memories or emotions he wants to address or re-experience. It radiated off his captain and flowed into Spock.

While the current was overwhelming, stronger than anything Spock had experienced, the flow was relaxed. Not demanding of him. He turned his head, thinking he may be able to say something to Kirk, instead he is met with the man’s lips on his in a human kiss. Spock closes his eyes and allows Kirk to lead. He has never done this before, but it seems as though they have been sharing kisses for ages. Kirk moves one way and Spock is already moving that way. Something in him aches. Kirk’s lips were soft, slightly cinnamon flavored, likely due to a recent coat of his favorite chapstick. Which Spock has often observed Kirk applying on away missions to colder climates.

Kirk nips at Spock’s lower lip and uses the slight gasp it causes as opportunity to slip his tongue into Spock’s mouth. He had always found the act strange, and puzzled over the likelihood it would bring anyone pleasure, but he found that he quite enjoyed it and was coerced into sliding his own tongue along his captain’s. He was shocked to hear a low moan escape him as Kirk withdrew from his mouth. Kirk chuckled and stroked his hand down Spock’s back to rest gently at his hip.

Kirk gently nudges Spock to face the wall of the shower with his back to Kirk, and he allows it. He has always trusted Kirk at his back. Somehow this situation although it was vastly different from those before it held the same logic. Kirk slots his chest against Spock’s back and the rest of his body follows suit to the point that even Kirk’s leg brushes slightly against Spock’s own. Then he feels it. Something he distinctly remembers avoiding with his eyes. Out of what? Courtesy? It seems that this situation likely calls for Spock to not only acknowledge but participate. Spock shudders. Kirk’s member is erect pressed up against Spock’s ass.

Kirk kisses a place beneath his ear, “You’re gorgeous Spock.” He kisses lower down Spock’s neck till they reach the juncture between his shoulder and neck where Kirk bites lightly and sucks. Spock reaches his hands out to rest them on the wall of the sonic. He finds he needs the support as his knees are becoming weak. His kisses land on Spock’s back now with no clear pattern. A hand goes to hold his hip and Spock’s heart jumps then picks up the pace as Kirk’s other hand trails down his spine. Down, down, down till he reaches the cleft of Spock’s ass and slips between. Kirk’s pointer finger circles his entrance and he tenses.

“Relax, darling.” Kirk’s voice lulls Spock to release. The tone still foreign, but familiar. His fingers tighten instead as Kirk goes from teasing to probing. Spock has little practical knowledge on the application of anal intercourse. He knows that it is an activity frequently engaged in for mutual pleasure. He knows that both humans and Vulcans have a prostate gland that when stimulated produces sexual pleasure. He also knows that typically in order to achieve safe penetration this way one would need to use lube. A shock of fear goes through him as he realizes that neither he nor Kirk have any before suddenly Kirk’s finger is inside him and he remembers he is dreaming. Apparently, in this fictional scenario his body has already been sufficiently prepared.

He lets out a breath and realizes that Kirk has not yet moved his finger, “Tell me when.”

“Now.” It’s the first word dream him has said, and he has little time to consider it before Kirk’s finger curves and sparks of pleasure shake through his body. Spock pushes his body back against Kirk and is rewarded with another chuckle.

“Eager are we? Patience, Spock. We can always do this again later, and again.” A second finger teases at the entrance and slowly joins the other. Kirk is as he said a patient lover. He takes his time to ensure that each addition is not too much on Spock and is careful to avoid Spock’s prostate to ensure he lasts when-

Kirk has moved back and Spock looks over his shoulder to see Kirk reach to the base of his cock and press it between Spock’s cheeks. He catches Spock’s gaze and leans in to give him another kiss. It is sloppy at this angle. Spock is not quite flexible enough to stretch his body around so that there is a corner of his lips that is missed. As Kirk kisses him he feels the ring of muscle around his entrance stretch as Kirk slowly enters him. He stops each time Spock tenses and whispers reassurance. Before long he is in till the hilt.

Kirk moves back and places both hands on Spock’s hips. His heart leaps. “Hold on, okay baby?” Spock nods his head. Kirk pulls back and snaps back hitting Spock’s prostate.

“Yes,” Spock is once again surprised at his own vocalization. Kirk grips a little tighter to keep Spock steady as he picks up the pace. Each time hitting Spock’s prostate. Kirk knows where it is, when to hit it, when to keep Spock hoping. He finds himself rolling back into the thrusts as much as possible.

Kirk reaches around to gently grip his throat and guide Spock up so that his back is flat with Kirk’s chest again. He kisses Spock’s neck and slows his already languid speed. Spock whimpers, pressing his head back against Kirk’s shoulder.

“Shh, baby. You’re doing so good.” Kirk’s voice is right in his ear. “Do you want it faster?”

Spock nods his head and only gets a grin in response, “What is that illogical word us humans use to request things Spock?” Kirk hits his prostate on purpose causing a sharp moan.

“Please,”

“That’s it,” Kirk grips Spock’s hip tight and picks up the pace till Spock cannot think of anything but the amazing feeling of being split open over and over again by his captain. Kirk reaches around to grab Spock’s cock and strokes it in tune to his thrusts. Spock’s legs shake so much that he slips, but is quickly caught by Kirk who only seems to find it amusing, not embarrassing, and only causes a brief pause in thrusts. Spock is moaning now frequently, unable to stop himself.

“Do you want to come, Spock? I want to make you come. Are you ready?” Kirk’s panting now. “You feel so good. I’m close, are you close?”

Then it’s black. Spock lays still for what may be minutes until he realizes his eyes are open, and the dream is over. He is in his room on the Enterprise separated only by a bathroom from the subject of his dream. He pushes down the immediate disappointment at not having experienced the end of the dream. It was an entirely inappropriate emotion. Selfish of him to want to see the conclusion of a dream Kirk treating him that way.

He sits up, intending to set up his meditation mat because clearly there is something he needs to address, when he notices the distinct wetness of his underwear.

“Computer, lights to 10%.” As the lights come on he sees the incriminating dark spot in his underwear. Spock had only orgasmed twice before in his life. Once in his young adulthood wherein he thought he should at least have a first hand experience of the fundamental functioning of his genitalia, and during Pon Farr when he had wrestled with Kirk. The former was an albeit unsound scientific endeavor, and the second had saved his life. Kirk had not commented even though it would be near impossible that he wouldn’t have noticed, something that Spock is secretly thankful for. That is not a conversation he wished to partake in.

Neither was the conversation that he had just orgasmed to an erotic dream involving that very person. Perhaps it was residual from his experience during Pon Farr. It is likely that his mind reached out to Kirk’s briefly during the encounter and is now faintly remembering it’s touch. It must be something like that.

Spock gathered his meditation candles.

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“Ah-ha! There you are Mr. Spock.” It was the last voice he wanted to hear. He had managed to successfully evade Captain Kirk outside of work hours for only 2.42 days before this moment. This, Spock found, was not sufficient time to meditate over his recent discovery. He hadn’t even the time to make sense of its origin, let alone work through it. He knew, however, that it was unlikely that he would be able to sort the situation before Kirk would find him. The man was insistent on keeping friendly relations with the crew and it is true that there hasn’t been a day since he first arrived on this ship that he and his captain did not have lunch if neither were not already predisposed. Spock’s silence on the matter was tell enough.

He kept his gaze firmly on his Plomeek soup as Kirk sat across from him at the two person table. Spock knew he should have taken lunch in his quarters, but he also knew the behavior would be suspicious and the crew may gossip. If the gossip got around to the good doctor there is no doubt McCoy would be on him with questions that Spock was ill equipped to answer. Though now Kirk will surely be on him with similar questions, and he would take McCoy over Kirk on this matter.

“Captain.” He acknowledged Kirk even though he found that he would prefer if he had the capability to transport anywhere but here.

“It’s so nice to finally see you off the bridge.” Spock didn’t have to look to know that Kirk’s blinding smile was in place. “Have you been busy?”

“I was assisting the new ensigns in measuring the outcomes of the latest ion storm. They are unfamiliar with Enterprise technology.” It was not a lie. He had been preoccupied in the science labs knowing that Kirk had obligations elsewhere that would keep him away from the science labs for a few days. If he hadn’t been caught in mess he may have been able to find safe haven there for four more days before Kirk had the availability to step into the science labs. Which he frequently liked to do. Kirk liked to be everywhere on his ship. No one person’s job would go unappreciated by their captain. It was an admirable quality.

The hidden truth is that he did not necessarily need to be the one to help the ensigns. Typically more seasoned Enterprise ensigns would have helped in an area as simple as unfamiliarity with Enterprise technology, but Spock needed something to do inside the lab on short notice.

“They must be ecstatic to have Mr. Spock himself giving them that help. I’m sure they won’t be making any mistakes.” A spike of fear came through Spock. It sounded as though the captain may have caught on to his bluff. After all Kirk is more familiar than most when it concerns Spock, but it was spoken honestly.

He raised an eyebrow, “Indeed.”

“Care to join me for a game of chess Friday?” It was Tuesday today, which would give Spock a fair amount of time to sort himself out. If he declined he had no logical reason to do so. His schedule was more open these days than it had been in a long time. Logically he would likely be spending that time recreationally with Kirk or working on independent projects, and seeing as he was waiting on peer review for his research he did not have the latter to fall back on. As if sensing Spock’s internal debate Kirk said, “It’s perfectly fine if the answer is no. It has just been awhile, and I miss our games.”

He was compelled to agree with Kirk. They were intellectually stimulating. Every time that he thought he was on to Kirk’s play style the man would do something so unexplainable that it would set Spock back in his analysis. “I too miss our games of chess. Very well. I will make time for chess this Friday. Does 7:00 p.m. work for you Captain?” Typically they met as early as 4:00 pm for chess, but he wanted to minimize the contact as much as possible until he could control or hopefully eliminate these inappropriate feelings.

“Why yes. That time works for me Mr. Spock.” He looked up and met the warmth in Kirk’s eyes. His heart lurched.

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Friday 6:45 had come much faster than Spock expected. These three days had felt faster than any other three days of his life. Which is illogical. It was still the same amount of time. He found that he was pacing, hands templed together in front of him. He did not pace. He had turned to science to find an answer and after hours of self-monitoring and analysis he was little closer to his answer than when he started.

He had never experienced sexual desire for someone before in his life not even his intended T’pring, who was unable to provoke even the slightest of feelings in him. Thus any instance of arousal was easy to track. He kept a log of every time he had experienced something akin to sexual attraction to Kirk in the past three days. Without taking into account the intensity of the experience he came up with a reference of twenty-one times. A notable spiked frequency during mess hours than bridge hours. He hypothesizes that this is due to Kirk’s attention being focused solely on Spock rather than divided between work and Spock.

He fears what the numbers would end up looking like if he were to be alone with Kirk. Kirk’s sole focus. He stops pacing and mentally catalogs that away because Kirk will be here in-The intercom buzzes.

“Kirk here! Let me in.” Spock takes one deep breath and schools his expression into one of Vulcan neutrality.

He opens the door, “Captain Kirk.” He nods and steps aside to let the man in.

His very presence is like that of a red giant star. “I thought we’d gotten through this! Off hours you can call me Jim.” Kirk walks to the chess arrangement and sits in his usual chair. He doesn’t even spend any time to survey the room. He’s been in Spock’s bedroom frequently. Kirk. In his bedroom. This was going to be hard.

Spock walked to take his place across from Jim, “Black or white?” He asks instead of deeming Jim’s statement with a remark. Truth is he is terrified of what he’ll think or do if those boundaries are crossed now.

“White this time.” Spock nods and watches as Kirk moves a pawn. A cautious start for him. “I’ve been reading something that I think you would find quite ‘fascinating’ lately.” Spock raises his brows slightly by way of response and moves a pawn of his own. Jim has this tendency to ‘fondle’ the pieces as they play. This is not the first time Spock has noticed it, but it’s taking precedence in particular today.

His hand hovers over the tops of the pieces, catching on the king, queen, and bishop. He selects the bishop by curling his fingers over the head. He sets it down and selects the castle. This he holds and runs his thumb along the length of it. The temperature in his room is lower than usual to accomodate for the captain, but he feels as though it’s hotter than Vulcan.

It takes him a moment to realize Kirk had been speaking, and now he is finished. He is looking as if awaiting a response, but not pressing. “Apologies, Captain. I appear to be distracted.” Kirk nodded and moved his castle piece forward.

“I’ve noticed.” Jim comments simply. He waits for Spock to make his next move before speaking again, “Is there something amiss?” He tenses. It was a question he knew was coming, but one he dreaded to answer. Jim would not allow a crew member let alone Spock suffer troubles if he couldn’t help. They were beyond the point in their relationship that Spock could pretend Vulcan’s had no emotions or that his human half did not have an influence on who he was.

“You don’t have to tell me,” Jim reaches for another pawn and moves it without a moment to think about it. “But if there is something I can do for you Spock I’d like to know.” Spock looks to the pawn and how he could take it with little repercussion. He does so without answering Kirk. His hand lingers as Kirk’s reaches to take back his pawn and there is the briefest of touches. That same warmth flowing into him. In a flash. Then shame so deep he has to wrestle the flush from reaching his face.

Jim. Admirable Jim genuinely wants to help him, when what he does not know is that the infliction Spock faces is to Jim’s detriment. He is ashamed that he would allow himself to go this far.

“Thank you, Captain, but that will be unnecessary.”

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They managed to finish the chess match cordially. Upon its completion Spock saw that Kirk left his room. The strain continued outside on the bridge. He, of course, noticed the captain’s melancholy, but feigned Vulcan ignorance. Kirk didn’t buy it for a second, but he also did not press.

The crew, on the other hand, bought into it more or less. He heard them talking. One conversation in particular stood out to him. It was in mess on the far side of the room. Spock was eating alone. It is likely the ensigns did not know of Vulcan superior hearing or else they surely would not have engaged in such a crass conversation so near him.

“-Captain Kirk is much more tense than usual.” Spock had taken no interest in any conversations around him until mention of Kirk. He typically attempted to mull all the sounds together as to protect the crew’s privacy. It was not any of his business what others talked about until it was. He did not recognize this voice. A quick glance denoted someone from engineering. He was sat across Ensign Kim, a biologist in the science department. “I overheard Scotty saying that it’s ‘unbearable’ to be on the bridge.”

“My friend Alyssa said that Mr. Spock was even more terse with her than usual. As if that were at all possible. Do you think they’re fighting?”

“That would be quite the sight! How would a Vulcan fight without any emotions involved?”

“I’m serious! Mr. Spock’s eating alone today. You know he hardly does that anymore. The captain is always there right with him.”

“He’s holding back on his world famous backrubs!” The two broke into a fit of snickers at this.

“It would explain why the captain would be so tense.”

“Speculation aside if you want my honest opinion the Captain ought to just get a blowjob. There is an abundant number of the crew that would pay money to do that! If I had free range like that there wouldn’t be a day that goes by without a blowie.”

“James! You know the Captain doesn’t sleep with the crew. Something to do with rank.”

“Then Spock ought to step up to the occasion! He’s on an equal enough footing, and from what I’ve heard he’s eyeing the captain all shift. Not that any of us know how to read a fucking Vulcan though!”

Ensign Kim was laughing quite loudly now, “It would certainly be an upgrade from the backrubs!”

Spock closed himself off from the conversation at that point. What he’d already heard was already causing a flush that was difficult to keep down. He was not certain of the intricacies of the ‘blowjob’. All he could draw upon was from context of the conversation it was an act more intimate than a back massage, which to Spock was already asking too much.

And thus somehow that unlikely series of events lead to where he is now. Sitting in front of his computer with the word ‘blow job’ typed into the search engine, which corrected the words into one ‘blowjob’. Simply put a ‘blowjob’ was fallatio. Vulcans had not used the term blowjob in place of fallatio when making reference to the act of fallatio, and he had no reason to look up the term for he typically forgot it when he heard it in passing on the Enterprise. Thus he had no reason to look it up until this point.

He has been around humans now long enough to pick up on the intricacies of sarcasm and joking. The ensigns had seemed to be mostly joking when suggesting that he perform fallatio on the Captain, but there was hints of truth in what James had said. The ensign had truly meant it when he said that the Captain would likely feel less tense if he got a blowjob.

The more he considered the images that accompanied the search the more he found he was curious. What if he did perform fallatio on the Captain like the ensigns had suggested. What would it be like to kneel on the floor at the foot of the Captain’s bed between his knees. Kirk as naked as he was in the dream his erect cock before his face. What would Kirk taste like. Spock knew that the sexual organ of a human male was often described as salty. Would Kirk taste this way?

Spock leaned back in his chair and allowed himself to wander. Kirk would look down at him with that languid smile, resting back on the palms of his hands. Spock would wrap his hand around the base of Kirk’s member and stroke like he knew would feel good for him. Kirk would let out a pleased sigh and roll his hips gently into the pull. Spock would press his thumb against the tip and smother his Captain’s precome across the head.

“Come on, Spock.” Encouraged by Kirk’s moaning Spock moves forward and licks the base to the tip. A test of taste. The action causes Kirk to shake slightly. Spock would enclose his lips over the head and suck. Kirk moans and jerks slightly when Spock’s teeth accidently catch. “Careful. Watch the teeth.” Noting Kirk’s warning Spock would slowly lower himself down the shaft and pull back. Repeating the process and taking more each time. Kirk’s hand went to his hair. Spock found he was growing erect and reached his hand down to palm himself.

He was not able to take the entirety of Kirk’s cock in his mouth so he used his free hand to stroke the base in tune to his sucking. The sound was obscene, wet, accompanied by Kirk’s beautiful moans. Kirk’s breath hitched and he gripped Spock’s hair tight enough to hurt. “Spock-Spock! I’m going to come-I’m gonna-”

“Kirk here.” Spock snapped to attention and removed his hand from his crotch as if it were a hot stove. Kirk was at his door, “May I come in?” Of course the Captain had to come at this time.

“One moment.” Spock opened his pad and recorded the instance of arousal in his chart. He then closed out of the ‘blowjob’ search window. He attempted to will his erection away, but found that it was quite resilient. Instead Spock went to collect his sleeping robe and wrapped that around himself and flattened it over his front. His erection was not quite as obvious as it had been in the tight starfleet regulated uniforms. “Computer, open bedroom door.”

Kirk was dressed casually in a plain white top and blue jeans that against all odds appeared to be just as tight as Starfleet regulation pants. He did not linger on the Captain’s thighs. “Captain.” He said. Kirk stepped into his room the doors closing behind him. He stood with his back rigid and his hands tightly behind his back. It was unlike the captain to have such a closed off stance, he realized it was for his own sake.

“Please, it’s Jim. I do not want to be the Captain here.”

“Very well.”

Jim waited a moment, as if hoping Spock would supply something further. Upon realizing that he would have to carry conversation he said, “Spock, why have you been avoiding me?” His voice was soft. As close to dream Jim’s voice as Kirk would get with him. It caused an involuntary shiver down his spine. Jim took a step towards him and he took one back. Jim stopped, hurt clear in his face. “If it’s something I have done, please let me know. I miss your company.”

“No Jim. It is not anything you have done.” Jim’s shoulders loosened. “It is in fact an affliction I appear to have placed upon myself.” Spock clenched his teeth. That admittance trapped him into explaining himself to some extent, when he should have kept it out. He met Kirk’s honest gaze and knew he should simply tell the truth. Whatever consequences came of it were deserved, because they would be judged by Jim.

“Sit with me.” Jim gestured to the chess set at Spock’s desk and sat in his usual spot. Spock joined him on the other side, although he wished that they had stayed standing, that way the conversation felt like it could end much faster. “What seems to be the problem?”

“I desire, Jim.”

“Yes?”

“I desire you, Jim.” Kirk sat silent. Spock focused on Kirk’s hands. They were clasped together, a strain around the knuckles. Jim rubbed his right thumb over the other, a nervous tic Spock had noticed shortly after being assigned to the Enterprise. Typically he did it during tense peace talks. Spock was afraid to meet Kirk’s eyes. What he would find in there.

Finally Kirk stood and Spock found himself still staring at that spot on the table as he felt Kirk step around to his side of the table. Gently Kirk’s fingers took Spock’s chin and even before he met the look in Jim’s eyes he felt it; acceptance, then hope, then love. Jim’s affection was a warm golden current. Soft and warm like the rust colored dunes of Vulcan. He followed Jim’s fingers as they lead him up to Jim’s lips.

Jim’s lips were not, in fact, smooth, but rough. Made that way from worrying them too much, but the emotion that radiated from him was better than any false fantasy that Spock could ever come up with. Tolerance was in abundance in his life, but acceptance in face of Spock’s truths, that was a rare cherished occurrence. And Jim did not only accept him for these things, but he loved him for them.

As they parted an ancient word whispered in the back of his mind. T’hy’la.

“Oh, Spock.” It was that soft voice he had dreamed of directed at him, but never expected to experience. “I have desired you as well. For months.” Jim leaned in and kissed the side of Spock’s lips. “I thought I was being quite obvious about it as well!”

“That may be my fault, Jim. I am not well equipped to the intricacies of human courting.”

Jim laughed and he crushed Spock’s body into a tight embrace and another deep, passionate kiss. He leaned back eyebrows raised as he looked into Spock’s eyes. “I didn’t know I was that good at kissing.” Spock’s confusion over the statement dissolved after Kirk pressed his thigh up against Spock’s member. “You flatter me Mr. Spock.” In his unshielded state a flush actually managed to make it to his face right up to the tips of his ears. “Blushing too! I guess I still got it, huh?”

“I am not sure what you are referring to by ‘it’.” He found that he was instinctively responding to the statement that would direct attention away from himself.

“How about I show you?” Jim’s eyelids lowered and he ran his hand down Spock’s shoulder to take his own. A spike of arousal shot down his system at the direct contact and a knowing look flashed in Jim’s eyes. He stepped backwards towards Spock’s bed and Spock followed. He sat down and patted the space beside him then leaned down to remove his boots. Spock sat rigidly beside Kirk as he unbuttoned his pants and slipped them off so that he was in his shirt and underwear. “Come on, Spock. Relax.” Kirk’s hands went to remove Spock’s robe, and Spock stood still and allowed him.

“I did not achieve an erection from your kissing alone.” He found the statement was out of his mouth before he had the chance to reconsider it. It was intended to defend himself against appearing inadequate in situations of this nature when the truth was he really did not know what to do with himself. He never put himself into situations that he did not know what to do next. This was vastly out of his comfort zone.

“Oh? You wound me.” Jim’s tone was playful as his hands went to Spock’s shoulders and he rubbed his thumbs in to release the tension there. The touch was through his shirt, which made it less imposing. Kirk likely did this on purpose for his sake. He should be the one relaxing Kirk in such a manner. “What is it then that can arouse Mr. Spock?”

He licked his lips and found his shoulders loosening under Kirk’s touch which traveled lower down his back to give the same treatment. “I was contemplating what would occur if I were to attempt to perform fallatio on you.” Spock looked down to his hands, which he had collapsed in his lap over his persistent erection.

“So you were fantasizing about giving me a blowjob?”

“Affirmative.” Jim paused and Spock feared for a moment he had stepped over some unspoken emotional boundary.

“That’s so hot.” Jim resumed his ministrations, “Take your boots off and tell me about it.”

Spock did as he was told, “You were on your bed naked-”

“Like this?” Jim asked as he removed his shirt and underwear. Spock sat eyes wide. Jim simply kept a smug smile on and said, “Please continue.”

Spock cleared his throat, “You were erect-”

“Getting there,” Kirk laughed. “Sorry, sorry, you were saying.”

“I was on the floor between your legs. I was fully clothed. I stroked you first with my hand and then attempted to take you into my mouth. However, I could not fit all of you so I had to use my hand as well as my mouth to cover your length.” Spock’s breath caught as he felt Jim’s fingers teasing along the bottom of his shirt.

“Oh, sorry, are my hands cold?”

“All human hands are ‘cold’ to me.” Jim laughed.

“In that case.” Jim slipped his hands under Spock’s shirt and leaned forward to press a kiss to Spock’s neck. “Is this alright?” Spock managed a mute nod. The scenario reminded him of that dream that started this whole thing. “Now I don’t know about you, but I am finished with talking about fantasies.” Jim gripped the bottom of the shirt and lifted it. Spock moved his arms to allow it to be taken over his head. Jim whistled. “I’m ready to make some memories.” He pressed a few more kisses to Spock’s back before pushing himself up closer to the head of the bed. He curled his pointer finger towards himself indicating Spock join him.

Jim pressed against Spock’s chest to lay him down against the bed, “Also, your dirty talk could use some work, but lucky for you I have a thing for socially awkward tall guys.”

“I am not a socially inept-”

“I know Spock. I’m just teasing.” Before Spock could say something or other about logic Jim unbuttoned and unzipped his pants in quick succession. “You tell me if something feels good, alright?” Spock nodded and felt his heart lurch as Jim’s hand slipped into his pants and over his briefs. His mouth hung open and his eyes shut as Jim stroked over his member. He felt himself twitch. Jim leaned in to his ear. “Take your pants and underwear off.”

Spock quickly did as he was told wanting nothing more than for Jim to return his ministrations. As he tossed them to the side Jim said, “I suppose I shouldn’t have expected you to have any lube. I guess the question is, will I need to retrieve it?” Spock’s eyes flash down to Jim’s cock. Which is hard and flushed red at the tip. He is uncut, a bit shorter than his own, but quite a bit thicker. Unconsciously he licked his bottom lip.

“Do you want to be inside me or not tonight?” Jim pressed. Spock flushed, and finds that he is unable to answer or look at Jim. A small smirk flashes over Jim’s face, “Or do you want me inside you?” He purred. Spock’s eyes widen just a bit and he nods his head so minutely that it could easily be missed, but Jim is always on alert for Spock’s miniscule tells. “Don’t run out on me, I’ll be right back.”

Jim turns to leave through the bathroom door. Spock immediately sits up and keeps his hands clasped firmly together. Jim does not take long. He nearly runs to the bed and jumps on, startling Spock. A hand is on his chest gently pushing him down again and Jim’s lips are on his own. He only has a second to return the kiss before Jim pulls back and looks him in the eyes. “Relax. Trust me. I’m an expert.” He flashes a smile before he kisses his way down Spock’s chest and belly to his sex.

He gives the head a kiss before going lower, lower. Until his mouth is on his entrance. Spock jumps up looking at Jim startled. Jim laughs, “I take it no one has rimmed you before?”

“No, Jim. No one has ‘rimmed’ me before nor am I familiar with the act.”

“Like I said, just trust me. It may seem weird, but I want to make you feel good. Let me?” Spock concedes and lowers himself down, now prepared for the weird feeling. Jim returns to where he was. His hands find Spock’s lower back and he pushes Spock up encouraging him to present himself. Jim then hooks his hands on Spock’s upper thighs and pushes his legs up. Spock covers his eyes with his hand. The position is far too unbecoming of him. Jim kisses the insides of his thighs slowly making his way back down to Spock’s entrance.

The second his tongue laps against his entrance he forgets the position he’s in and focuses on the feeling of Jim. He probes along the entrance slipping his tongue inside. Spock’s hand tightens on the sheet. It feels strangely incredible, and then it’s gone. He looks down to see Jim smiling up at him as if to say ‘told you’, but he doesn’t say it. He simply returns to his actions. Spock moans lightly as he gets particularly deep. His toes are curling in the air.

Jim leans back and lets Spock lower his legs to the bed. He reaches for the tube and opens it. Coating his fingers. He rubs the lube in his hand to warm it up and reaches up to give Spock a kiss. Spock is a bit reluctant to kiss Jim right after what he’s just done, but the desire to do so overcomes that reluctance. As Jim kisses him he feels Jim’s middle finger spin around his entrance and enter easier than in the dream. Possibly due to the ‘rimming’. Jim lowers to Spock’s neck as he starts to move his finger.

“Tell me if it gets uncomfortable.” Spock nods, but does not say anything. He’s rolling against the finger like he had in the dream. Jim’s lips descend on a nipple as his second finger joins the first. Spock moans as Jim sucks the nipple and lightly pressing his teeth against it. He gives the same treatment to the other as he searches for Spock’s prostate. He knows he’s found it when Spock suddenly stops. “There we go baby.”

Jim leans back to admire his handiwork as he begins to finger fuck Spock right up against his prostate over and over. The Vulcan squirms in his spot, a sheen shine of sweat covering his skin. “Jim,” He pants. “Please Jim.” Jim slows down till he pulls out of Spock and he swears he heard Spock whimper.

Jim finds the condom he brought and rips it open. He hurriedly gets it on before getting the lube and slicking up his cock. “Ready?”

“Yes, please Jim.” Kirk lines himself up and uses a hand to help him get the head in. After he is a few inches in he grabs under Spock’s knees and pushes them up to get a better angle. He begins to push down as he watches Spock’s eyes screw shut undoubtedly experiencing a battle to keep emotional displays down. “Yes!” Spock says as he feels Jim’s balls against his ass.

Jim begins a gentle pace, reassured that he is still hitting Spock’s prostate by the steady moans falling from his lips. Jim leans down and captures Spock’s lips against his own again as he picks up the pace. The kisses are interrupted by a stream of moans falling from both mouths and the occasional sentence fragment of ‘so good’.

Before long and without warning Spock feels his body peaking. He tenses and manages a, “Jim-!” Before his body is convulsing and his thick seed is spurting across his belly. Some reaching his chest.

“God yes! You’re so beautiful Spock-so so beautiful- Ahhn!” Jim pushes Spock flush against him as he shudders and emptied himself into the man below him. Spock feels Jim’s warm come inside him and shivers at the feeling of that thickness slowly leaving him and some of the come spilling out with it. Now that the moment of arousal has passed the experience is quite unpleasant, but he finds that he is incredibly satisfied.

Jim leans up and kisses his forehead before he gets up and enters the bathroom. Spock is not concerned that Jim has just left him, which somewhere he thinks maybe he should be concerned about that. Doesn’t Kirk have a reputation of being a heartbreaker. Though Spock knew the truth of this rumor. He heard the click of the bathroom door closing and then felt the dip in the bed as Jim re-joined him. He smiled when Spock caught his eyes and pressed a warm towel to his entrance. He hummed as he cleaned up Spock and when he was done he tossed the towel on the floor. An action that certainly would have frustrated Spock if it was any other time. All he could be concerned with was the warmth of Jim at his side as the human cuddled up to him. He placed his hand over Spock’s chest and played with his chest hair.

“You see Spock memories are much better than fantasies.”

Spock was inclined to agree.