‘Ok, cold brew with nothing in it.’ Kageyama thought as he neared the coffee shop. He never understood how someone could drink just straight coffee but hey who was he to judge? His coffee usually consisted of half coffee, half milk. More milk than coffee if he was going to be completely honest.
He closed his eyes as the sun rays warmed him, especially since it’s been raining non stop the past week. Soon the comforting smell of coffee beans invaded his senses. He walked in and straight to the counter, pretty relieved that he seem to have missed the rush hour. He never really liked being in crowded places.
He paid for the drink before shuffling towards the pick up counter as he watched the baristas make drinks. A person stretched next to him and kageyama couldn't help but stare when he turned. Soft brown hair that was styled, smooth pale skin, glasses that were perched on a strong nose.
He was a gorgeous man, if Kageyama said so himself.
Kageyama’s heart was thumping so hard he knows that the people close to him can hear it. All because of the brunette, who hadn’t even looked at him. A part of him was telling him he shouldn’t even care about this man, that he has a boyfriend and this person shouldn’t affect him like this but a another part, a bigger part, wanted the tall Brunette to look his way, to run his hands through that styled hair to see if it felt as soft as it looked.
‘‘One Venti sized Chai with two shots espresso for Oikawa!’’ The Baristo said loudly before turning back to the espresso machine.
‘Oikawa’ His name even sounded heavenly.
And then the man suddenly stared straight at him. Calculating chocolate brown eyes bored right into his own sapphire colored eyes.
The brunette then gave a warm smile and as if nature wanted to tease Kageyama, the sun shined behind Oikawa, enhancing the handsome stranger’s aura.
It made Kageyama feel like a little child.
Honestly Kageyama didn't really think he’d see Oikawa after that day at the coffee shop but life seemed to wanted to mess with him.
“Ah, cutie from the coffee shop.” A smooth voice called out to where Kageyama was. He was at the farmers market browsing for things to make for dinner. The noirette almost dropped the tomato he had in his hand, jerking his head to see bright brown eyes and a small smirk heading his way. Kageyama inwardly panicked when Oikawa stopped next to him. “Fancy meeting you here. What are you up-”
“I have tomatoes.” Kageyama felt like slamming his face into the fruit stand and knocking himself out to avoid feeling even more embarrassment as Oikawa face gave a weird look. Why did he say that?!
The brunette inhaled before throwing his head back in laughter. It was loud and dorky and caused everyone around them to stare but Kageyama couldn't help but blush even more and soaking up the genuine laugh.
“O-oh my god, th-that was so random.” Oikawa choked out before taking a deep breath, giving the blue eyes boy a smile, cheeks flushed and the corner of his eyes creased. Kageyama couldn't help but be happy he was the cause of it. More so his awkwardness but nonetheless him. Oikawa straightens up before holding out his hand. Kageyama stares. “Well? Are you going to shake it or make me look like an idiot.’’
That shook Kageyama to reality as he shook his hand. “Ah, Kageyama Tobio.’’
“Hm Tobio-chan, I’m Oikawa Tooru. Glad to have a name to match the pretty face I’ve been thinking about lately.’’ He said flirtingly.
Again, Kageyama blushes but he quickly stops it. “As handsome as you are, I have a boyfriend already.’’
“Hey, no one said anything about dating.’’He says teasingly but had Kageyama looked closely he could see the disappointment in those brown eyes. “I’m new to the town and was looking to make new friends. I happened to have seen you the other day at the coffee shop and thought it was destiny for us to be friends.’’
Kageyama cocked an eyebrow. “Destiny...really? it’s kind of a small prefecture, we're bound to run into each other sooner or later.”
A small white lie. Kageyama is rarely around that side if town, usually for Suga.
Oikawa waved his hand around “Details details.”
Kageyama rolled his eyes before turning back to the tomatoes.
“Well since this is the second time seeing each other I'm calling it fate, so give me your phone.”
Kageyama rolled his eyes and walked off
After that unexpected meeting at the market, Oikawa and Kageyama (“reluctantly” giving his number to the brunette) started to talk more and even going on friendly outings like from the movies to the new ramen shop that opened downtown even just small walks in the park.
One time as they were sitting at a fountain, Oikawa had asked what was something not a lot of people know about. Kageyama blushed before grinning mischiefly and pulls out his earbuds and connects it to his phone. He motions the brunette to put them in his ears and when he does, Kageyama puts on one of his favorite song. Needless to say Oikawa was blushing like a virgin as he stared at Kageyama with a scandalous look. ( Later, Kageyama had explained that one of his classmates was an exchange student from America and showed him a meme with a verse from the most raunchiest, ridiculous song he's ever heard and he's been a fan of her music ever since.)
Thinking back to that day made the noirette smile down at his phone. Honestly, Kageyama hasn't felt this light in a couple years. But reality had, once again wanted to screw with him.
“I'm glad you're out meeting new friends. When do I get to meet this mysterious person who's preoccupying my boyfriend's time?” Suga says, wrapping his arms around his neck, leaning against the taller boy. Kageyama noted the slight jealousy in Suga's voice.
Kageyama felt guilty as he noticed he hadn't even heard a word Suga had said in the past couple of minutes. Turning around, he wrapped his arm around the grey haired man's waist.
“You know, he's new here. Why don't you invite Sawamura-San and Asahi- san and I can invite Tanaka and Noya-San over. Maybe if I introduce him to other people, he won't take up my time anymore.”
Suga put his hand under his chin and made a fake thinking noise before smiling. “Deal.”
Honestly, Kageyama hasn't felt this light in a couple years.
Kageyama always felt like cracking up whenever he heard that ridiculous greeting. He looked up from his phone and made a face, questioning the elder's choice if clothing.
The brunette noted the look and stuck his tongue out.” What's with the face? You're going to wrinkles like that.”
“Nothing nothing. Anyways I was wondering if you'd like to come over and hang out? My senpai's are coming over and I figured you could meet some people.”
The brunette gave a quick smile. “Sure.”
The small get together was running smoothly. Tanaka and Nishinoya fiddling with the sound system, Suga and Daichi in the kitchen getting drinks. Hinata, who joined in last minute, was chatting up a storm with Oikawa, who had a strained smile with how fast the short man talked. Kageyama snorted as he sat the appetizers down before walking to them.
“Oi, I said introduce yourself not talk his ear off.” The blue eyed man said, smacking his friend in the head. Hinata squawked and rubbed his head, glaring at Kageyama who had turned to Oikawa. “Sorry, he tends to get excited when meeting new people.”
Oikawa had a fond smile on as he leaned on the counter. “Its fine, my friend Makki is the same way. I'll have to introduce you guys sometime.”
Kageyama opened his mouth to say something when arms wrapped around his waist and a chin was placed in the crook of his neck.
“Hey Tobio, you finally going to introduce me to your secret friend.” Suga said teasingly. Kageyama gave a quick peck to Suga before moving the other next to him.
“Oikawa, this is Suga my boyfriend. Suga, this is Oikawa.”
The two smiled at each other while shaking hands.
“So you're the one keeping my boyfriend's attention?” Suga said, gripping the others hand hard. Oikawa raised his eyebrow and smirked and squeezed back.
“I guess I am. He's such a big helper, showing me around.”
Suga hummed before letting go and wrapping an arm around Kageyama. “Well hopefully someone here can take that burden.”
Suga pulled Kageyama away and to the living room, leaving a frowning Oikawa behind.
“Whoo let's get this party started.”
He wakes up to something brushing his face. He scrunches his face lightly before opening his eyes, staring straight into warm chocolate brown eyes.
He smiles lightly and it must have looked funny because there's a laughter and suddenly it's like a light jolt of electricity goes through his body as chocolate brown eyes turn hazel brown.
“What's got you smiling?’’ Suga says softly, his face full of adoration and Kageyama can’t help but kiss the man. This was his boyfriend, his lover. Sure he can think about Oikawa for a second but at the end of the day, Suga was his and he was Suga’s.
“You, of course.’’ He lied and it must have been convincing enough to have Suga laugh.
“You’re so cheesy but you’re right, anyone waking up to this would smile.’’ He says pointing to his face to chest. Kageyama snorts before kissing him deeply. They make out for a few minutes before Suga pulls away slowly and looks at him. “I have to ask you something.’’
Kageyama looks at him in confusion as Suga fidgets nervously. He nods.
‘’We’ve been together for almost five years now and we’re so good for each other… I was wondering if, you know, maybe later after we graduate and junk, you’d like to get married? Only if you want to!! I won’t be upset if you don’t want to.’’ He says the last part quickly.
Kageyama feels like he’s in heaven as he leans up to kiss the grey haired man eagardly.
“Of course I’d love to.’’
A small part of him doesn’t.
Blue eyes looked up at the sky as Kageyama sat down, taking a break from his morning jog. The park was quiet, only a handful of people out, jogging or walking their dogs. There was even a sweet old couple feeding the birds. Kageyama wondered if he and Oikawa would be like that in the future before he shook his head in horror.
Him and Oikawa? He knew he liked him but he loved Suga, his high school sweetheart, the one he's been with for almost 5 years. Since his second year. Who he just recently had talked about their future and moving on. He looked down at his hands, riddled with guilt as he starts to think about Oikawa more.
Lately, he and Suga have been distant but he's so caught up with Oikawa he doesn’t notice that Suga never kisses him before he leaves for class or how the grey haired man stays out later than usual. He should really end this and focus on Suga more but everytime he thinks about ending the friendship between him and Oikawa, his heart literally stops and it hurts.
What is he going to do?
“I can see myself spending the rest of my life with you.” Oikawa said one day as they stared at the ducks residing at the pond. Kageyama’s head jerks towards Oikawa, cheeks flushed but a small part of him felt relieved almost happy the brunette felt the same. An equal part felt guilty and stress because of his current predicament.
“Honestly I could too but you know I can’t. Suga and I? We have history and for me to end it all. I couldn't do that to him…” he said, looking away with a frown on his face.
Oikawa didn’t say anything, still staring at the ducklings swimming around. Kageyama stomach started to turn with guilt before a large warm hand covered his. The brunette wasn't looking at him but Kageyama could feel his whole self lighten at the gesture. He hesitates but he holds the hand back.
“I guess we’ll have to wait til the next lifetime and then I’ll be the one who gets you first.’’ Oikawa says, determined.
“You know we may not even be humans then, Maybe we’re butterflies or something.’’
“Doesn’t matter, I’ll win your heart first.’’
They stay quiet as Kageyama’s heart beats fast at the confession.
The both of them stayed at the pond, hand in hand as Kageyama's phone lights up in silence.
Kageyama’s back shot up in slight pain as Oikawa pushed him back against the wall.
He and Oikawa were just going out for a couple of drinks the only difference was that the brunette was acting shier than usual. On the walk to the train station Kageyama touched his shoulder and asked what was wrong. The brown eyed man just stared at his face with a smoldering look. Kageyama can feel his ears heat up as Oikawa moves in closer, pinning his body against the wall.
‘I think I love him’ The blue eyed man says as warm lips press against him hesitantly before pressing harder, heatedly. Kageyama exhales through his nose before kissing back, grabbing the chocolate locks in desperation. He knows its wrong but he couldn’t help but as Oikawa pulls him closer, He couldn’t help but feel loved and safe and-
’Oh’ he gasps as Oikawa presses his tongue against his lips, moving it slightly across asking for an entrance. Kageyama gives it to him. He feels as if there was nothing but the two of them and it wasn’t until the brunette brings his hands to the noirettes hips and grinds against him that reality comes crashing down on Kageyama.
‘What the fuck am I doing?!’
He can’t think straight as he shoves Oikawa off of him in a hurry. The brunette looks as if he was processing what’s going on before turning to look at him in confusion.
“Why did you stop? I thought-’’ He stops himself as he continues to stare in frustration. Kageyama can feel the tears swell up in his eyes.
“You know I can’t do this, I...love Suga.’’ He says, feeling his throat clogs up.
Oikawa looked furious at his statement. “And I love you! and I know you feel something for me too because you kissed me back.’’
His heart feels constricted when the taller man moved closer, grabbing Kageyama by the back of the neck to kiss him again before moving his lips to his ears. “Fuck Suga, Tobio. End it and be with me. I can’t stand not being with you, not being able to kiss you, to feel you. You should be with me and you know it, deep down but you don’t want to admit it because you're with HIM!’’
Kageyama flinches and he pulls away. “Don’t do this please. See it from my point of view. I’ve been with him for five years. FIVE Oikawa, I can’t just throw that away like that. And you’re right, I do feel for you but I can’t be with you…”
Oikawa’s eyes darken before he grips Kageyama’s upper arm and pulls him closer. He thought he was going to kiss him again, the worst part is that he knows he’ll allow it but when Oikawa doesn’t kiss him and just stares he starts to feel that crushing feeling again.
“I won’t be second fiddle to that guy. Tobio, I love you. I can’t get you out of my head and God dammit I just want to pin you to this wall and-and fuck, Hell! I want and need you it's not even funny, so please… be with me…’’ Oikawa asks, no begs desperately. Kageyama can’t breath, can’t speak, can’t feel even when Oikawa kisses him one last time before walking away.
He stands there for god knows how long with tears pouring down his face. His feet move on their own accord as they take him home. He’s numb, so numb that as he walks into the apartment, he doesn’t hear the rythmic thumping coming from the bedroom until he opens the door and stares in shock.
Suga on top of Daichi. Suga. His boyfriend. Riding his best friend. God.
“T-Tobio!!’’ Suga yelps as he topples off of daichi and covers himself in shame. Kageyama just takes a deep breath before closing the door and heads to sit on the couch. There's a bunch of shuffling and the door closes and its silent for a couple minutes before someone sits next to him.
Kageyama looks up to see hazel brown eyes brightened with tears and he reaches to wipe the tears off Suga’s cheek. The grey haired man is quick to grab his hand and kiss it in guilt. Its quiet for a moment.
“If I’m going to be honest, I think we all would bottom for Daichi.’’ He jokes lamely and Suga lets out a mix of a sob and a laugh before clutching his hand tighter. The tension isn’t as suffocating now.
“I love you so much and I don’t want this to end.’’ Suga mutters
Kageyama smiles sadly as he brings his forehead to Suga’s “I love you too and I don’t either but do you think this could continue? You love Daichi and I… have feelings for Oikawa, really strong feelings and they won’t go away.’’
The confession brings a load off his shoulder and he doesn’t know if that's a good thing or not. Suga looks at him and then kisses him. Kageyama’s eyes close as they sat in silence. Suga spoke up.
“ Remember when we had that small get together a couple weeks ago? And everyone got drunk? I knew that I had lost you to Oikawa even though you didn't see it. His eyes were constantly on you, always a few feet from you. And it wasn't because he didn't know anyone and wasn't uncomfortable, because he is that person who makes friends just like that. No you were all he saw. Like you held the reason to stay, not for the get together, but life itself. He barely gave anyone a second glance, and you? Everytime you looked at him, you had that look in your eye, like he turned your world and showed you the freaking key to universe. You never looked at me like that and I-I just knew that that was it.”
Hearing the pain in Suga's frantic rant had brought a fresh round if tears. He pulled the grey haired to him and they stayed like that until Suga kisses him one last time before leaving.
The choice is made. And it was excruciating.
His head hurts for weeks. His chest burns and he can't think straight.
It’s been a few weeks since Kageyama and Suga broke up. It was mutual and clean on both sides. He texted Oikawa the day after about the break up and to give him some time. Oikawa doesn’t answer and He appreciates it. He knows that if the brunette texted him it would lead to things he’d regret and he needed to get his feelings sorted.
Suga moved in with Daichi and Kageyama stares at the blank spaces on the wall with a picture gripped in one hand. The ex couple took the time to take down all the pictures and reminisce the good times they had before deciding that they should keep their favorite and burn the rest. His was of them on his graduation day. It was the same day Suga asked for him to move in with him, since they were going to go to the same college and it was one of the happiest days of his life.
He sucks in a deep breath before standing up, placing the picture on the counter and walks out the apartment, his feet automatically taking him to the coffee shop. He doesn’t know why, yet a part of him does. He hopes that part is right.
Walking in to the shop, warmth surrounds him as he looks around slowly. His breath stops as he sees the tall brunette lounging on a stool chair, head on his fist as he looks at the counter lost in thought. He still looks handsome even if he was a mess.
Kageyama walked slowly to him and stands next to him. Oikawa blinks and looks up slowly, jerking up right and opens his mouth to say something but stops himself. They sit in silence for a moment before Oikawa holds his hand out. Kageyama takes it without a second thought. He watches OIkawa stare at their joined hands before bringing it to his lips, kissing Kageyama's fingers gently. The noirette brings his head to rest on Oikawa’s shoulder and they sat their in peace for awhile.
“I didn’t actually order anything.’’ The brunette confessed and Kageyama just laughs before pulling at Oikawa to follow him. They walk in silence before they reached Kageyama's apartment. Once they were inside, Oikawa looked around the semi empty apartment before noting the picture on the counter. He walked over to it and picked it up, and look took over his face.
Kageyama took the picture from him and put it to the side. “I just wanted to apolo-”
He was cut off as a pair of hands cupped his face and a pair of warm lips pressed against his. He took a second to enjoy the feeling before pulling back.
“I should be the one apologizing, I was drunk and-”
“No it was mine, we obviously had feeling for each other-”
“Which I shouldn't have made you-”
“Look if you cut me off again, I'm going to beat you.”
The two looked at each other before smiling at each other.
“Look, it was wrong of me not to consider your feelings...and I'm sorry.” Kageyama muttered.
Oikawa looked at him with unreadable look before walking to him and pulling the younger of the two into his arms.
“It might be a dick thing to say, but I'm glad you're not with Suga anymore.”
Kageyama didn't answer, his heart still aching but it helped being in Oikawa's arms . He just sighed and leaned up to kiss the brunettes neck lovingly.