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Denial

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It had happened so fast Malcolm could almost believe it hadn't happened at all. He had just imagined it.

He'd imagined walking down the stairs in the Richmond Terrace building after a visit to DoSAC.

He'd imagined looking down into the open space of the lobby.

He'd imagined grinning a bit evilly when he heard Jamie hurling abuse at some fuckhead from the Health Department.

He'd imagined the scream of bursting glass.

He'd imagined the out-of-control car blasting into the lobby.

He'd imagined the nauseating sound of breaking bones.

He'd imagined running.

He'd imagined blood running through his fingers.

He'd imagined someone screaming for an ambulance (himself?).

He'd imagined the clamminess of Jamie's hand on the way to the hospital.

He'd imagined the scared look on his face when he told him it would be alright.

He'd imagined the nurse turning off the ECG.

He'd imagined the doctor's apologetic expression.

He'd imagined racing through corridors, desperate to get out.

He'd imagined stopping in a street he had never seen before.

He was just imagining the numbness in his heart.