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Long Nightmares and Short Dreams

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The moments passed by as Toga’s last remaining embers of light started to slip away. Her dead body finally taking her final stages until there was nothing left of her. She was wasting away. That I knew, but to see her begin to waste away after the damage was done had ripped away any clear sense of knowing what could come next for us. See, I used the word us, damn it, I must be going insane. My lip was bleeding, I still didn’t care anymore. Peeling my moist body off of the ground. I began to clean up, this wasn’t the first time I had to clean up a body, I didn’t really matter who it was anymore. Her… Soul was gone. That was all that mattered, not the body, but that no matter how we could look at this, Toga is gone. The pressure in my head began to alleviate at the thought. Pushing the remainder of my hesitation away. Preparing myself for finishing up the body. I opened up the cabinets and grabbed a few garbage bags. The next few minutes weren’t significant. I didn’t feel anything, just the weight on my arms as the bits and pieces of her body. When I finished I didn’t even feel my face other than pins and needles. My lips began to twitch. Once it was all sorted into the bags the only part, was… The head. She looked like a mannequin. Devoid of any expression or the like. I picked it up from the ground. I made sure the cut was clean. I didn’t want to ruin her anymore. This was the only thing that was left perfect. The only part of Toga that looked as beautiful as she used to be.
I looked up at her bruised skull. Her jaw slack, and her bright eyes had no control over themselves, sliding from place to place. I looked her in the eye. “Why you,” I spat. “If all else was going wrong,” I sucked in another breath, “Why was it you that ended up dying,” my voice didn’t crack, my face apathetic and my fist clenched. “I should’ve died,” I sighed, “It would be the only thing that I would enjoy,” My eyes looked more dead than Himeko’s. At least hers had fight left in them. A wave of burning anger and a push to survive. Even if it was just a little bit.
Dabi was the first one to enter the room. His face nothing but a grimace. His eyes dark, scouring the room. His head didn’t move, his lips were trembling. He noticed that the room looked spotless.
“Good,” His voice was trembling too, “You handled it,” he tried his best not to cry, his eyes sparkled in an ugly way. It disgusted me. The way he was this close to crying. While I was stone cold. I wanted him to get angry, to burn down this damned apartment, to be cold, to do anything but that. I hated it. He could have done anything else. Not that… She was dead, not in pain. Never even close to it. Everything that she was suffering with is gone. That’s what she is, gone. I didn’t know how to take the slanted praise. I held in my breath. Looked up at him and left. He made a ‘come here’ gesture. I followed him outside the door. We walked down the spotless hall coated in yellow light. Everything was too clean, it made me uncomfortable. It shouldn’t be that way. I didn’t quiver, I just continued down the hall. I slid my head up tiredly, peering up at Dabi’s face. His scars were stretched tightly as he made an awful grimace.
The remainders of my thoughts were all in disarray as I began to twitch once again. I was falling apart again. A chill ran down my back once again. I didn’t know why. The walls were closing in, with their over clean surfaces, and the yellow light that gave me a migraine. It felt as if they were angry. I was insane. Absolutely insane, the walls weren’t closing in, neither were the lights swinging around. The walls weren’t over clean, they were normal, normal, normal, normal, walls. I didn’t believe it. I couldn’t believe it at all.
I kept up my head. The floor was blurring. I knew that they were not tears blurring my vision. I couldn’t see straight. Then the pain came. I collapsed on the floor. My head was flooding with the pain. Dabi stood over me. His hand closed upon itself. Gripping and flexing his hand. He stayed silent. His dark hair sticking to the sweat on his face. His hand shook in his grip. I tried hard not to look up into his eyes. My stomach started to hurt. Nausea flicking over my eyes blurring the world again. A burst of heat consuming my body. I needed to vomit, my eyes felt weak as I couldn’t move them. They lolled about as I tried my hardest to focus on something, anything. The too yellow walls were crushing me now. I couldn’t see Dabi anymore or anything for that matter. Everything decided to go black.