Chapter 1: I would never leave you -Balthazar
I know its short, but I think this is what makes the story appealing to me, sorry if you don't like it but please, do enjoy! :)
I would never leave you.
That is what he told me. I miss the way his wings flutter; the way he barges in like it is no one's business, like he fucking owns the place. He always did that with me. I miss it every time I get hurt because he healed me, his grace warm on my skin as he tells me:
I would never leave you.
The times I hunted with the Winchesters and he was there when Dean yelled. He listened to my rants and comforted me through a friend's death. He told me everything would alright and ended that sentence with:
I would never leave you.
When the other little angel tried to kill me for redemption, for being a nephilim; he was there to protect me. When I went into a nest of demons, he was there. He promised:
I would never leave you.
But now when I need him most, he is not here. Things are different now; there are Leviathans, Castiel betrayed us, the angels are fighting, and Sam is gone crazy. You said- no you promised:
You would never leave me.
Now when the world is hell and Castiel, the one who brought the Leviathans here, is dead; you leave me. You lied, so where are you now, Balthazar? Can't you hear my prayers?
Please don't leave me...
Chapter 2: your fault - Gabriel
I've nothing to really say about this piece except for more angst. Not every chapter I post will be angsty, there will be some fluff :>
This was not what I wanted. I never wanted you in my life, you pried your way into it. I told you no but you insisted; candy loving freak, you lied to me the first time. You faked your death and ran away like a coward.
I hate the way you made me love you. When that stupid Englishman returned you though; I felt my unanswered questions pile up. You explained through those scared Enochian letters. I know you remembered me because you didn't meet my eye.
You took your grace now? You don't look the same. The stitches in your lips that kept you quiet are gone, but your eyes are still bitter. I cant help but miss those whiskey coloured eyes but I know it is too late.
When Asmodeus came for you, did you not destroy him and fly away? You went for revenge, just like I did ten years ago with the Winchesters. I know that look; the deep hatred, the yearning for blood, the eyes of betrayal.
I lay here right now, wondering why you haven't come through the portal. Sam is giving me the look and I am jumping through what is left of the this stupid portal. As I fell through and land on the darkened apocalyptic world, there you are: dead for sure. I turn my head to Lucifer, the hatred once again burning in my eyes. Even he, in that moment, looks down and to his alternate brother: Michael. I know what he is telling me as he looks to Michael.
I lock eyes with your alternate brother now, and he is nothing but a monster. Did you say you, Michael, Lucifer, and Raphael were Archangels? Then why is it that now that I actually take a look at him everything is cold, heartless, and empty.
Gabriel, I warned you to stay away. Why did you pursue me like your life depended on it? Now as Michael kills me, Lucifer tries to help me. Does Lucifer feel guilt? Why can't you? The pain is too much; I can feel my soul literally start to split in half. My soul stops splitting apart but now it is being carried off into some place else. Back through the portal I go, but not in Heaven nor Hell.
Gabriel, will we ever see each other again? I love you but I can't fell where you are. I try to see but its nothing but darkness, are you here with me? Or are you all alone?
Chapter 3: You with the cold eyes -Lucifer x Male!Reader
Eh, I dont know what it is about this story. Just came up with it and went along with it. Enjoy or dont, but there will be mentions of drug abuse and abusive relationships.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
It hadn't been long. I don't know why things have changed and became different between my family. My sister hates me now for no reason but she seems to forget that I am five years older than her. She told me that I had to stay out of her business, I warned her and now she is dying in front of me, begging me for help. I stared at her, shrugging and turned away. In my opinion, it was her fault for not listening to me when I told her that her friend was dangerous. Her friend got her into this mess and now I wasn't going to help her.
This wasn't the only time this had happened either. The day my friend lied to me, when she pushed me away when I offered my help and protection/ I told her that I would protect her, that I wouldn't let anything bad happen to her. I let her have her space and I didn't push her around, but one day I went to warn her about her boyfriend. Told her that her boyfriend wasn't right in the head. He ended up beating her, she didn't tell me. One day she called me, instead of the cops and I didn't call the cops.
"No... (M/N) please call the cops, I'm sorry. It wasn't right, what I did before... I just," She paused. That day on the phone I screamed in anger. She had told the whole school lies and rumors about me, then told me she was tired of being my friend.
"Sorry, no. Call them yourself if you have enough time to call me, bitch," I snarled through the phone before hanging up. I smashed my home phone on the ground and turned, abandoning my former friend.
That was the last day I heard from her. I never said anything to the cops, I moved with my family and went on with my life. Yea right, what life? I turned to my older brother, looking at him dead in the eyes. His eyes were cold and hard, searching for answers. "Where is Kara?" He asked coldly. I shrugged, turning my head. "Answer me you fucking dick!" He spat, punching me in the face.
"Yea, and I'm the dick? Says the one who is dating three girls at once. Well let me start with your girlfriend going on five years that two girls you met one right after the other?" I spat. He hit me again and grit his teeth. To that I just grinned and shrugged, "Well, it's true," I snapped.
He slung me to the ground, kicking me in the stomach. Why had things changed between me and him? How had things changed? I couldn't remember much of when we were little, but it had actually been a battle for mother's and father's attention. "Shut the fuck up. That means nothing right now, where is Kara?" He asked, "I know you two have been fighting recently but she is later than usual!" He snapped.
I shrugged, opting for the truth, "Out with a friend," A half truth with no lie is just truth right? She HAD been out with a friend, BUT I had seen her friend with these other guys beating the shit out of her. I hadn't lied, I just never said that she was being beat up; although, I wish I could do it myself. "More specifically, near the closest bar in the alley," I said. He got off of me and raced out of the door. I sat up, sighing. I walked up to my room, bumping into the youngest brother. He looked at me and smiled his energetic smile.
"Hey (M/N)! Where is Kara? Big brother Mark was looking for her, he was asking me just a second ago," Kyle said. He was a year younger than Kara, but still acted like a child even thought he was fifteen. I smiled and ruffled his hair, I could never stay mad at Kyle, he was so innocent.
"Hey kid, whatever happens, it's fine. Okay?" I said. He nodded and I walked into my room, shutting the door behind me. I looked at my clock, it was 9:00 PM. It briefly made me wonder why I even bothered with my own family anymore. I had three brothers and one sister. The oldest was two years older than me, Mark, who was at least 23. I was 21 and my other brother, Rain, was 20. Kyle and Kara were the odd ones out, but I guess they only really had each other. Me and Mark fought ever since we were little and Rain played peace maker between the two of us. Kyle often got upset and never said anything, preferring to hide instead and Kara just hated all of us. Our parents were dead, so right now with Mark, the one that had been all of our legal guardians, nothing was going well.
I sat down at my desk, taking out a book on monsters. I read until the clock began to read 11:00 PM and shut the books. When I went to bed it wasn't long until it was morning. I got up and started packing what little stuff I had and went to a hideout that I made not too far away in the woods. Once I got past my family I hid out there, opening my weapon cases. I packed a shotgun loaded with silver bullets, a pistol from bullets I had made from an angel blade, and a demon blade.
My phone rung and I picked it up, flipped it open, and pressed accept. "(M/N) there is a case not too far from where you are. I would go myself but..." Garth said on the other side.
I grinned and shook my head, "Nah, 's quite okay," I said, going to my 1970 Dodge Challenger. I put my weapons in the back and ran my fingers over the hood of it. My other friend gave it to me for my birthday the day before she was torn by a werewolf. I squeezed my eyes shut and got behind the wheel of the beautiful car. "So where is it?" I asked, grinning.
As he told me the location he also told me the Winchesters would be there. I faltered slightly, shifting my eyes to the road in front of me. "Got it, bye," I said. I took off in the car, my eyes on the dirty road until it came to a slightly smaller highway. I sighed at being able to leave my family behind today. Mark hadn't been home, but he knew what I had done to Kara. My eyes were cold, staring out in front of me until I was at my destination.
"Oh, (M/N)! How's it been?" Sam asked, recognizing my Challenger. I grinned and gave him a hug, squeezing my eyes shut happily.
"Not real great, family shit y'know? Other than that I am so good, finally moved to my little fort in the woods," I said. I went over to the Chevy Impala and ran my fingers over it's shiny black coat of paint. "Aw man, I have missed this beauty!" I said, smiling.
Dean came out of the motel and rolled his eyes, "Hey, hey! Hands off of Baby!" He said, eyeing me up and down. I grinned putting my hands up in the air in mock surrender. "look, y'know we could usually handle this case ourselves... but, there is a problem," He said. "Think it's better if you come on in," He said, urging me to follow. I followed them with a raised brow until they lead me to their room. He opened the door and I blinked at the sight. "Yea, we asked Garth if he would but he said no," Dean said.
I stared at Lucifer, my eyes reverting back to their cold gaze, "He didn't tell me I would be... uhhh," I trailed off. "Yea sure, I will help. Where are you two going anyway?" I asked, tilting my head.
"Just into town, something has been "imitating the voice of a man and calling them by name before the victim disappears," apparently they have been showing up half eaten," Dean said. I lifted up my head and nodded, "We are going to go now, make sure Lucifer doesn't err... cause trouble," He said. I looked at the Lucifer on the bed that was doing nothing but staring off into space. I noticed the huge wings behind his back, tilting my head in confusion.
"Sure.." I said, watching them walk out of the door. I shifted uncomfortably and looked back at Lucifer. His eyes snapped to mine, making my heart beat quicker. I shivered at how cold his ocean blue eyes were. I shifted my eyes away from him and sat down in a chair, not too far away from the bed.
Lucifer stared at me, making annoyance bubble up in my stomach. "Your eyes, they're cold," He said. I froze and glared at him. "I can't hear your thoughts real well, it's like they are hidden," He said randomly.
"'S none of your business, mate," I snarled at him. My eyes hardened at his shit-eating grin. I felt my fists clench but then I stopped and sat down, pulling out a book instead. "Whatever," I said shrugging.
He frowned, his shoulders slumping slightly. We sat in silence for an hour until he started singing to himself. My eyes snapped up to his awful singing until I told him to stop. He did stop, but thirty minutes later he was tapping his fingers in boredom. I sighed, tossing the book down. He stared at me and grinned, "I'm bored, pay attention to me!" He whined. I snapped my head over to him quickly and squinted. "What? I had to try, you dampen the mood," He complained childishly, making my eyebrow twitch.
"Look, what do you want me to even do about it? I need food anyway, I am hungry," I said, a sickly, dangerously sweet tone masked my voice. He locked eyes with me and I narrowed my eyes.
"Hm, just sit down and talk with me," He said, smiling. I squinted, the smile did NOT suit him at all. I shrugged and turned, "Where are you going?" He asked, standing as well.
I opened the door and stopped abruptly, him crashing into me. My eye twitched and I turned quickly over to him, "I just said I was hungry, unlike angels and demons, I need food to survive," I said. I just let him follow me, defeated as I went to get into my car. I drove off to the nearest fast food place, looking through my playlist for some music. As we drove I turned on some Def Leppard, briefly wondering why Lucifer didn't just fly.
I pulled into a small burger joint but decided to go through the drive thru since Lucifer was with me. I saw Lucifer in the corner of my eyes grin and wondered what he was up to. That curiosity didn't last long though, as he exclaimed, "I want to try some of this food!" I blinked in slight confusion, wondering why he would even want to eat human food.
"I thought angels didn't eat?" I asked, my brows furrowing in confusion. He faltered slightly, and I gave him a weird look.
"I uh, well we don't..."
"So why do you want a burger?" I asked, my eyebrow raised. When he didn't answer I shrugged, getting him a burger anyway. I quickly ordered food and decided to get two burgers and fries for Sam and Dean for later. As I was driving back, I heard a stomach growl, but it wasn't mine. I looked over to Lucifer, my gaze confused. It now made me question why Sam and Dean hadn't killed him, why get another hunter to watch over him? Once I pulled in the parking lot and got out, we went straight to the room.
Once we got inside, Lucifer really did eat the burger and fries. He didn't complain like Castiel had that one time after getting his grace. Apparently food taste like 'molecules' even though technically you are always tasting them. They are in everything because everything is made up of molecules. When did this become a science lesson though? I ate my burger peacefully and when I finished I noticed that Lucifer was already done.
"(M/N), you have been staring at me since we left to get food," Lucifer said. I furrowed my brows once again, thinking of an answer.
"I just don't understand, apparently to Castiel food tastes like 'molecules' to angels. Why are you eating if you don't need to eat?" I asked. He froze like he did in the drive-thru. Was there something wrong with him or something?
Lucifer shifted awkwardly, looking down at his vessel's hands. "Yea, about that. I lost my grace and the Winchesters found me, I don't understand why I have to eat," He said. He obviously hated this, and the fact that he has to eat like a human. "I haven't completely lost my grace, I can still see my wings, and I can also still read other people's minds, but it's fading," Lucifer explained. My eyes softened at him and his eyes searched mine. "You know, your eyes are not as cold as they were when you first came in the room to 'watch' me," He added.
I looked away, my cheeks beginning to feel warm. "Shut up!" I snapped, blinking and avoiding his eyes. "I have no idea what you are talking about, you have went insane," I snorted. He smiled and I frowned. This kind of seemed really weird in my opinion, I thought that he was supposed to be frowning, or at least trying to kill me in outrage.
"So why are your eyes always so cold?" Lucifer asked, "You seem alone, like you are running from something," I glare at him, not quite wanting to answer. "You already know my story, I want to know yours,"
"Well we don't always get what we want in life, now do we?" I growled, not in the mood to talk. He frowned, making me feel slightly guilty and I shrugged, "Its not like its important anyway," I said.
Lucifer thought for a moment before his eyes danced with curiosity. "Come on, I want to know more about you!" He said happily. I almost thought he was cute for a moment. He reminded me of a lost puppy, those ocean blue eyes shining with a child's mischief.
I smiled, shrugging, "Sure, I guess I will tell you," I said. I started with the time Mark and I used to be really close. Our mother died giving birth to Kyle, and father was the only one to take care of us. I told him how I was the second oldest out of five children. "Mark really hated me for the longest time, he even blamed me for father's death," I said. Technically it was my fault, but I didn't care since father abandoned me first. "I was sixteen when our father died, leaving Mark to take care of us. Rain had tried to stop mine and Mark's arguments but he never was really good at it and usually ended up taking Mark's side. The youngest ones, Kara and Kyle were kind of the odd ones. Kyle loves candy, he never really stops eating candy and Kara hates all of us. She protects Kyle but I am like a poison to her. She literally tried to run away with Kyle because me and Mark fought so bad. She betrayed me in the long run, come on, we were family but that gave her no right to treat me like a toxic weapon. So yesterday I left her out with her traitor best friend since she didn't listen to me when I told her that her friend was a bad person," I finished. "I left them this morning and got a call from Garth. I thought I might as well just do as I can right now anyway since I plan on never going back to my family for anyone except Kyle," I said.
Lucifer was silent for a second before he looked at me. "We are not that much different," He said. He smiled and I looked away, "So what's your favourite colour?" He asked.
I gave him a looked filled with suspicion and shrugged, "Hmmm... (F/C)," I said, smiling.
"(F/B), do you even read?"
"Nope. How about favourite food?"
"(F/F) but also (S/F/F),"
"Don't have a genre, I like a lot of music," I said, grinning. We asked questions for a while, enjoying each other's company. He was the first one I had ever had a comfortable talk with and never snapped at. Sadly time was cut short when Sam and Dean came walking in. They immediately started looking through lore and books, I had to take them their food from half an our ago. "I got you guys some food, why didn't you guys tell me he lost his grace?" I asked, frowning.
They looked up and shrugged. "We didn't really think much of it. How did he do anyway?" Dean asked, eyeing up Lucifer. He definitely would rather put a bullet in him and be done with it, but I already found myself protecting the fallen angel. "He didn't say anything too weird did he?" He asked, squinting his eyes at me.
"Other than act like a complete child for a few hours, no. We actually had a nice conversation, and got to know each other. It's only Lucifer," I said, shrugging. I heard Lucifer snort behind me and I turned.
"Only Lucifer? Never get that reaction out of people," Lucifer joked. I smiled and rolled my eyes. Dean and Sam raised their brows at me, both curious and confused by my reaction towards his comment.
Dean whispered something to Sam and Sam stared at me. "Wait, you just smiled. Actually smiled, usually your smiles are tight and forced!" Sam said, eyeing me up and down in suspicion. I shrugged and Lucifer grinned proudly, making me elbow him in the ribs and snort.
"Watch it, Lucifer. Your ego might get too big for your head and you will mistake God for a horse," I said, wrinkling my nose. That sent me and Lucifer into a small childish argument over the smallest shit. I turned and stuck my tongue out, "Nyeh! I am so much more awesome than you anyway! Sam and Dean can definitely vouch for me!" I said, puffing out my chest. Sam and Dean rolled their eyes getting to their research while Lucifer and I acted like children.
At night it took me forever to get to sleep. I squeezed my eyes shut and rolled over, feeling a pain on the scar across my collar bone. I sighed and looked at the faint scars on my wrists from handcuffs. Someone I once trusted got me arrested and Sam and Dean literally had to bust me out. I shivered slightly, noticing someone move across the room. I had gotten a separate room from Sam and Dean and they made Lucifer come with me. I squinted noticing that Lucifer was still up, staring at the bed, probably wondering why he had to sleep like a normal human.
He looked at me, noticing me staring at him in the dark. "Why are you still up?" He asked, squinting. I sat up shrugging.
"I can't sleep," I said, my voice monotone. "I don't really like sleeping anyway. I usually stay up as long as I can before I go to sleep," I explained. My eyes went blank as I stared up at the ceiling. I wondered how he stayed in the cage for so long? He was so lonely there, no wonder he seeks so much attention.
Lucifer grinned and sat beside me on the bed. I glared at him slightly. "Well, then I will stay awake as long as you," He said, lying down. I gave him a look of suspicion, "I don't want to be alone," He muttered quietly, probably thinking I didn't hear him. I lied down next to him and hugged him.
"I understand..." I said, finding sleep come to me easier than I would have thought. We lied there that night, cuddled next to each other. It was probably the best sleep I had ever had in my life.
I had been researching the monster while the boys were away and asking small questions about the monster that they were hunting. After a while of looking through lore and mythology I came across an article on a beast that the Greeks called Leucrocotta, Crocotta for short. It has been said in the book to imitate the voice of men and lure them away from the safety of their homes or of their jobs by calling them by name. They retreat further back to lure them closer to the sound of the voice and then make a meal of them.
I called Sam and Dean quickly, I was sure they had probably never heard of this beast. "Who is it?" Sam asked. It was quiet for a moment when I found the story on the creature.
"I think I may know what we are dealing with," I said. Sam told Dean and put me on speaker, "The Greeks called it Leucrocotta, but I will just say Crocotta for short. The Crocotta is said to imitate the voice of men and lure them away from the safety of their homes or jobs my calling them by their name, and then once they have them alone they make a quick meal of it. Apparently it had the body of a stag, the neck of a lion, cloven hooves, and a wide mouth with a sharp, bony ridge in place of teeth. I don't know if the description is right but whatever you are hunting, I would be careful," I said to Sam.
"Got it! Thanks, (M/N). I think we may have killed one a while back," Sam said. Dean said something right after and I rolled my eyes. Lucifer had been listening to me the whole time and tilted his head.
"Oh, well what did it look like...?" I said, trailing off. Lucifer grinned and leaned in towards the phone. He grabbed it from me and I reached out to grab the phone back. "Lucifer! Give it back!" I exclaimed wildly, trying to get my phone back. He was only an inch taller than me, so he had a slight advantage, damn that one inch difference.
"Hey~!" Lucifer said through the phone. I could almost hear the wince of the boys on the phone at Lucifer's loud tone. "I don't think this is a normal Crocotta. Crocottas eat souls and this one devoured the body, I think you might be looking at something straight out of the book!" Lucifer said. My eye twitched and I jumped making Lucifer walk backwards slightly. Damn him!
I caught him off guard taking the phone back before apologizing to Sam and Dean. Lucifer just huffed childishly. "Nah, it's okay," Sam said. "I think he may be right though, or he either ate the soul and then the body, but they wouldn't do that. We met one and it just ate souls. I hope Lucifer is wrong about this, or may not be a Crocotta," He said. "Well, we are going to check it out, bye," Sam said, hanging up.
Lucifer grinned and I glared at him, hugging my phone. "My precious!" I hissed. This made Lucifer roll his eyes and grab the book I was about to read after I had finished with the research. "NO!" I said, flinging myself at the book.
"Hm, I wonder what you are reading," He said, flipping the pages. I blushed wildly, the cover was fifty shades of gray and I wasn't a fan of people reading my books.
I snatched the book out of his hand. "None of your business!" I said too quickly. This made him grin and hug me while I walked. I tried to pry him off of me as I walked and I groaned. "Please... Get off of me...!" I said, struggling to walk as he clung to me like a leech.
"But I am soooo BORED!" He wailed childishly. I groaned, face-palming at how childish he was. I dragged him with me out of the door and got ready to walk down the stairs. "Woah! Don't kill me!" He said dramatically, letting go of me. My eye twitched as I pushed him away from me.
"If you are so bored just go find something to do other than bother me until I die!" I complained. He smiled and dragged me back in the room like I was a rag-doll. "Luci!" I groaned.
He got out a board game and literally made me play with him. It was actually really fun and we ended up throwing things at each other in the end once we got tired of the game. I was currently hiding in the cabinets, hoping I wouldn't get stuck once I decided to come out. The doors were really small, but I think I could get back out?
"(M/N), Lucifer, where are you guys? What the hell!" Dean said, seeing the kitchen cabinet door move. He opened it, finding me inside and I smiled innocently. "What the fuck are you doing in here?" He asked, extremely confused and trying not to laugh. Lucifer came out with of the bathroom with a plunger and grinned.
"Oh! That's where you were! I accidentally clogged the toilet with hair supplies," He said. Sam came in and blinked at me inside of the cabinets and looked at Lucifer.
Both of the brothers were extremely confused as to why he was holding a plunger and why I was hiding. "Uh, why are you holding a plunger?" Sam asked Lucifer, blinking. "And why are you in the cabinets!?" Sam asked me, holding in his amused laughter.
"I got hair supplies stuck down the toilet drain. I knocked them over looking for (M/N). I thought I could flush the toilet and they would be gone but uh, they got stuck," Lucifer said. He then looked at me, "How did you get down there?" He asked, pretending he had just noticed me. I tried to get out, realizing I really was stuck.
I tried to pull myself out once more and huffed. "Guys, I need a little help. I think i'm stuck," I said, a little embarrassed. The boys laughed and Dean helped me out of the cabinets.
"What were you two even doing in here?" Dean asked. Lucifer and I grinned childishly, making Sam and Dean give a worried look.
"Well... It started when he made me stub my toe on the table. I hit him with a frozen fish and made him chase me and I came in here and hid in the cabinets, I head him go in the bathroom and things fall down but I wasn't risking coming out of this little death trap. So uh, maybe we should check the toilet, but other than that I think we are good to go!" I said, grinning.
Sam rolled his eyes, "Wait, you hit him with a frozen fish!?" Sam asked, snapping his head to me. I just shrugged and smiled innocently, "I didn't even... You know what, I don't want to know what you were doing for him to make you stub a toe..." He said trailing off.
"You really dont, Sam, you really don't," I said, grinning. Lucifer smiled childishly and we high-five like two children, making Sam and Dean roll their eyes.
Sam and Dean had killed the crocotta, Lucifer had been right, it wasn't a normal one. It had been summoned by a Greek goddess and had made the crocotta of their legends kill and eat people. I had taken Lucifer with me to my little hide out in the woods because Sam and Dean were busy with other things. Lucifer had so far been the most annoying creature I had ever lived with so far. He was literally the only one who cared about me even though I refused to accept that.
I groaned when Lucifer broke one of the plates in the small little building. He laughed and shrugged it off while I literally threw a few spoons at him. I think his grace was replenishing because he stopped sleeping and he was slowly starting to stop eating. I also noticed how some of his odd quirks were coming back. It only confirmed my suspicion when he flew in while I was supposed to be sleeping. I caught a glimpse of his wings again and this time instead of faded they were all there. I had no idea why he stayed, to be honest.
I woke up the next morning to Lucifer sitting on the edge of the bed. He smiled at me, just like he had when his grace was almost gone. He wasn't cold like I thought he would be. Instead I think I was starting to become cold because every time that I had felt my heart flutter when he would touch me I snapped at him. I didn't know what this feeling was. Just like the time when we were out in public and a woman was flirting with him and flirted back. It made me a little jealous, even though I tried to tell myself I wasn't jealous.
I sat at the table, poking my food. I stared blankly at the wall, only looking over to the side when I noticed that Lucifer came in the room. He practically danced in the room, his happy mood fighting off my bad mood. I couldn't help but smile, just the mere presence of his was enough to make me feel giddy inside. I grinned as he grabbed some food.
"You know you don't have to eat right? I know your grace is back, you don't have to pretend," I said. He looked at me from the corner of his eyes and put the apple that he grabbed down. He frowned slightly, "I'm not mad that you didn't tell me. I just happened to notice you fly in while I was sleeping and your wings aren't faded in my eyes anymore," I informed bluntly, eating my eggs and bacon.
Lucifer sat at the table and picked up the apple again taking a bite out of it. "Then I will eat it because I enjoy it. By the way, if you knew, why didn't you say anything?" He asked. I shrugged, "You shouldn't be able to see my wings either," He pointed out, studying me closely.
I shifted under his gaze and blinked awkwardly, finishing the last bites of my food. "Well... I noticed them over at the motel a month ago. I didn't say anything because I thought Sam and Dean could see them... They are really pretty!" I said, smiling. I noticed him blush but he quickly hid it. I grinned impishly, "Awww! You are so cute!" I teased. He looked away and stood, finishing his apple in a few bites.
We stayed in the small house today and I took calls helping Garth give information to a few other hunters. I got a call from Mark and I paled. Lucifer noticed and tilted his head at me. Mark's voice was cold as ever but I could tell he only called me because something came up, or so I thought.
"So Kara just got out of the hospital," Mark said. I blinked in surprise, had she been in the hospital for a month and two weeks? I didn't really care or anything, but they didn't tell me. I didn't really want to know, but that literally tells me how they feel about me. "She told me that you had just left her there and didn't do anything to help her. Over something so childish? Fuck you!" Mark spat through the phone. "If I knew where you were right now I would fucking rip your head off and feed it to the wolves!" He growled through the phone.
My eyes hardened and I felt my heart tighten in anger. "Excuse you? It was her own fault, she needs to fight her own battles. If she hadn't of done what she did maybe I would have helped her, but I didn't and I don't care. Tell Kyle I said hi, and if you deny me that to my little baby brother I will find out," I threatened. We sat there and cussed each other out on the phone before he hung up. I threw my phone out the window and cursed.
Lucifer gave me a concerned look, his eyes softening. "What's wrong?" Lucifer asked. I shrugged him off and he gave me a hurt look. I immediately felt guilty, my heart throbbing at his hurt look. "Come on, talk to me! What did he say?" He asked sadly.
"Please Lucifer, not right now. I don't need you right now, not ever. All you do is get on my nerves," I spat coldly. He flew off quickly and I cursed under my breath. I slumped against the door wondering why I had to push him away like that.
It was about a week later and Lucifer still wasn't back. I felt really guilty because all he wanted to do was help. I prayed for him, hoping he would come back. My brother had called back, but it was Kyle this time. He was asking me questions, wondering why I had abandoned them and I had no answer. It was a short phone call before Mark made his get off of the phone. I sighed, slipping off my coat and throwing it on the bed. I waited for Lucifer for at least three more days before I went on a hunt.
I had been going on hunts now and it was three months since I had left home. I was at home and finally attempted to pray once more. He actually showed up this time. I tackled him in a hug, his cold eyes widening in surprise. I squeezed him tight and felt the urge to kiss him, but I never gave into that urge.
"Lucifer! Please! Never leave me like that again! I am so sorry, I didn't mean to push you away, I was just angry. I know you were only just trying to help," I said quickly. He smiled at me and I smiled back.
"I didn't leave you, I just figured you needed some space," Lucifer said, shrugging. "I didn't know when it would be a good time, I uh, needed time to think as well," He said. I felt my heart flutter again and I mentally cursed myself for it.
After he came back I stayed by him and he never left my sight. Although I think it was the other way around and I was the one that never left his sight. Whatever feelings I had towards his grew, everything that he did made my heart flutter. When he went out on hunts with me I felt so happy that he was there when I woke up in the motel. I was so glad he wasn't gone while I slept, in fact he stayed beside me when I slept. I almost didn't remember when he barely had any grace.
He let me groom his wings as well. I loved brushing my fingers through his wings and feeling the soft feathers beneath my fingers. I wished that everything would stay the same as it was at that moment. I began to realize my feelings throughout the end as love and tried to distance myself as well. I felt awful about it afterwards though.
While we went out for a hunt, this woman flirted with him, making me feel jealous. I think Lucifer noticed because he didn't flirt back like last time. He even began to tease me about it. Right now we stand on top of a tall building, looking over at the bright lights of a city down below.
"(M/N), I love you," He said randomly. It took me a few seconds to process the words that had just left his mouth. I stared at him blankly as he grinned impishly. He leaned down and kissed me, making my heart flutter as I returned the kiss. "I began to notice my own feelings towards you the day you pushed me away..." He admitted as he pulled away.
My heart beat faster and I blushed, "I didn't think you loved me back..." I muttered. "I just thought that you just thought of me as a friend," I said, looking away. We stood there, talking to each other and the other kiss we shared felt like a taste of Heaven. I felt my soul burn and I saw his wings glow slightly. I muttered I love you's and went through Lucifer's unbearable teasing afterwards. I finally felt loved after all my years of being alone. I had never believed in love until that moment.
Sorry, I just felt like writing something long and sappy this time! I really hoped you enjoyed this because I had fun writing it!
Chapter 4: Sentiment - Arthur Ketch x Reader
Haha! I am back! I have posted! I had to delete 2 rough drafts of chapters that were really bad, sorry bout that!
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
I flipped through the pages of a book out of the many in the library. Lore. Lore. And more lore. I huffed and threw the book down on the opposite side of the table, the eyes of Ketch meeting mine. I shot him a glare and he rose a brow at me. Currently we were waiting for the Winchesters to return, but I on the other hand was not doing so well with the idea of just sitting here.
"Boring," I uttered plainly. Ketch sighed and rolled his eyes and kept on ignoring. I shifted in my seat and attempted to look through another book for useful information, but to no avail. "STUPID," I hissed out, causing Ketch to send me an annoyed glare. I growled in boredom and stood from my chair. "I have to do something! Books, books, and more fucking books," I said pacing the room.
I heard a sigh come from Mick beside Ketch. I tapped on my arm and bit my lip as I paced, thinking through the statistics and possibilities. More more more MORE. I couldn't stop the echoing in my brain as I couldn't stop the anger I felt at not being able to think without them slipping from me. I muttered under my breath and got out my gun, taking it apart.
"Do you have anything better to do than pace... and take apart your weapons?" Mick asked in slight annoyance. I shot him a glare and he slightly flinched. I gave him a twisted look of anger on my face and put my gun back together.
I pointed it at him. "No, I can have fun with target practice!" I blurted out angrily. He raised his hands and Ketch sat up in his seat, his fingers twitching in the direction of his weapon. I lowered my gun and sighed, pinching the bridge of my nose. "No, no no! Statistics is all I see. I remembered everything in these books and it's the same as the first time I have ever read them! I have read every single book in this library and I still can't remember anything about that stupid nephilim. ITS NEVER HAPPENED BEFORE and I DON'T KNOW," I yelled angrily.
They both watched me carefully, seemingly not entirely sure on what I could do next. I was agitated and frustrated. So anything at that moment could happen because they knew everything I was capable of. I calmed down and sat back down, running my fingers through my hair. I drew my lips in a straight line and closed my eyes, piecing together every bit of information about archangels as I could.
Ketch and Mick muttered something to themselves and I shot them brief glares when they got too loud. I tapped my fingers on the table as I thought but the only thing I could think of was a being that could possibly be as strong as God himself. I frowned even more, if that was even possible and snapped my eyes open again. God.... There it was again.
Anger rose through me briefly at the thought of God. I don't know why I hated that being so much, it was like every world was nothing but a book to him... like he would just abandon a piece that didn't seem to fit his imagination. "Come on.. back to that stupid child..." I muttered. Ketch seemed to have heard what I said because he looked over to me with both brows raised.
"Maybe I should give you a hunt to keep yourself occupied," He said bluntly as I whispered to myself. I shot him a glare at hearing his voice after hours of his silence. I was almost disappointed it was not Mick who said anything.
"Not my fault... I can't seem to- God! Why? Just why?" I blurted, startling them both. "I fucking hate this life! You know what I am tired of?" I ranted. They looked at each other surprised by my outburst. "Sentiment and... pain. I can never think without always seeing the consequences of everything I do or the Winchesters do. I just hate everything about this life!," I hissed out, standing. "Fuck it, I need a drink," I walked out of the room, gripping my gun as I left.
I heard a sigh behind me and I turned to see Ketch following me. What does this piece of shit want? I thought rudely. He stopped when I did and stared into my eyes as if he was looking through my soul. I froze under his cold gaze and mentally urged myself to just go and find a monster to hunt. He stepped closer to me and I sighed, waiting for him to say something.
"What is your problem? You have been nothing but agitated since Sam and Dean left to go find Lucifer. Here I thought you were the calm and collected one," He mused coldly. I narrowed my eyes at him and then breathed in sharply. "I actually expected better of you," He added.
I chuckled darkly and glared at him. "Really? Sorry to disappoint," I snapped in slight disgust. I waited for his next words, but after hearing them... I should have just turned away. I was not prepared to hear what came out of his mouth next and froze completely.
"I would have thought you would have remembered you training... after all.... didn't that group raise all of their lovely assassins to be..." He trailed off and lifted my chin, making me look into his eyes. His silver eyes seemed to glint as he stared at me and I grit my teeth at his next words, "Well mannered and efficient? You seem a little bit dulled down," He said that as if I was just a tool.
That pissed me off.
I grabbed his wrist and in two steps had him on the ground with his hands behind his back. "You say that as if I am nothing but a weapon. You say that as if you are not the same thing. The way I see it, the British Men of Letters trained fucking pansies to the way I was trained. Say that again you fucking Englishman," I seethed.
He laughed and I got off of him, furrowing my brows in confusion. "That's better, I hate seeing you mope around," He said. He seemed to note my confusion and a rare smile formed on his face.
"Fuck you," I muttered, a small blush forming on my face. "You did that on purpose to get me fired up..." I scoffed, actually smiling. He sighed and dusted himself off, making me mimic his posh accent. "Oh come on, it's only a little bit of dirt!" I said in my best accent, making him snap his eyes to me.
"That actually sounded accurate and true," He pointed out on my accent. I smiled, glad for the distraction.
I shoved him lightly, "No, it was probably terrible," I said with a grin. "Hey, wait... You're smiling!" I pointed out. His smile immediately fell but it was too late. I grabbed his cheeks and he struggled. I pushed up the corner of his lips to imitate a smile. "You know, you look better when you are smiling," I said softly.
"Y/N..." He said slowly as I laughed. I stopped laughing and stared at him, feeling my face heat up. I looked away and covered my mouth with one hand.
"Sentiment," I muttered. "I felt a slight bit of sentiment towards you," I admitted. I noticed Mick watching us with an awkward look on his face and I blushed harder. "Oh hey, didn't notice you there," I said casually.
Mick quickly shuffled out of the room and I tilted my head in confusion. Why did he leave the room so quick? Did I say something? No, he saw Ketch and I acting all... friendly, I thought awkwardly. Ketch seemed to noticed my awkwardness but decided not to comment on it, which I was glad for.
"You know, he reminds me of a cute little butter ball," I snorted. "So innocent and untouched by the horrors of other humans and monsters even though he knows what they are capable of," I sighed. "Yet, I know that what I just said isn't true and he does know. He is just scared," I commented. "Scared of what he can do, of what they can do," I rambled.
Ketch shot me a look and I sighed. "Do you love him?" He asked abruptly. I jumped and almost fell at his words. I laughed and shook my head in amusement at his blunt words.
He seemed to be a little frustrated at me and shot me a glare. "Sorry... wait what? No! God no! I don't believe- I don't... No," I said quickly, tripping over my words. "No, I think of him as a friend. I feel bad for him actually. The way he was brought into this life isn't fair.." I said carefully, watching his reaction.
He nodded and averted his eyes. I frowned and thought for a moment. Should I test out what reactions I can get out of him? His reaction was strange... I thought to myself. I pulled my lips in a straight line and eyed him for a moment.
"Arthur," I said softly. He looked over to me and I froze at the look in his eyes. His eyes were intense when I said those words, slightly concerning me as to what was going on his mind. "Odd," I walked closer to him and his pupils dilated. Not with anger... with something else. I felt the words dancing on the tip of my tongue but I dared not say them. Even those words would ruin me...
I grabbed his face and brought him down to my height. I pulled his face close to mine and kissed him lightly, my own heart thumping in my chest. I wasn't even expecting a reaction like that out of myself, but I went along with the feeling. He didn't resist either and his lips moved against mine in perfect sync. I was slightly shocked that he didn't push me away.
Pulling away from him I muttered something under my breath. "Damn it. I love you," I told him lightly. I didn't know what urged me to say it, the look in his eyes or the way that kiss alone made me feel. All of the times he had ever been over, all the times I had ever went to the BMOL base. I didn't even know that I had grown attached to this man.
He was quiet for a moment, blinking at me. For a moment I felt stupid and went to brush off what I said but he kissed me again. "I love you too," He whispered. I smiled at him sweetly as he smiled at me.
"I knew it. It was odd how you asked me that question. By the way, I love your smile," I said, kissing the corner of his lips. I left him in that room, waving at him with a cheeky smile as I walked back to the library. I heard him briefly mutter something under his breath as I left the room and allowed a small smile to grace my features.
Sentiment, I wonder if it is a good thing or a bad thing. I certainly don't mind the feeling towards Arthur...
Sorry this is short and terrible. I don't know why I wrote this. Enjoy it or don't ;( I did take a while to write this because I didn't know what to write. I tried writing a Dean one but I wasn't in the mood for writing Dean so I stuck with Ketch.
Chapter 5: You're not you! - Dean
What if Dean never became human after becoming a demon?
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Of all the things that kept me going, it was you who stood out among all of the others in the world. It was you who brought me from my darkest times, and it was you that stopped me from becoming a monster. Now you don't remember anything you felt towards me and I can't find the light inside of you anymore. Dean, come back to me.
I fumbled with my demon blade, looking into Dean's soulless eyes. I was torn in between killing Dean and saving him. Sam had tried his best to make Dean human again, but it had failed. For some reason, not even the human blood was working and Dean wasn't turning back. Sadness filled my heart and I ignored the fact that I was going to be one of the one's to kill him. There had to be some other way, right? Killing him wouldn't solve anything... it couldn't solve anything.
"Sam... if we can't turn him human again we are going to have to be the ones that kill him," I said in distress. Sam shook his head, "I know he is your brother, Sam he is my boyfriend. But we have to if we can't find another way to turn him back," I told Sam. He sighed and slumped his shoulders.
"You're right, but we have to try to find another way," Sam protested. My heart twisted in my chest because I was supposed to be the one protesting. I couldn't bring myself to protest against myself though because that would be what Dean would want, right? I had to be doing something right, but something inside of me was telling me that it was useless because Dean was already gone. Sam smiled at me sadly, "We will find a way," he added persistently. I frowned and shook my head because we didn't know if we would find a way. Not this time at least.
"Sam, face it. You don't even know if we can find a way, let alone actually find a way that works!" I snapped, not missing the exasperated look from Sam. He was giving up, we had tried everything we knew and nothing was working. I turned around, going to the door. "Look, I need a break," I said slowly. Sam didn't even try to stop me once I got out of the door, and I didn't blame him. We both needed space away from all of this bullshit, and stressing over our little problem wouldn't make anything better. It would only make things worse if both of us started yelling at each other, and I was half scared of another word to come out of demon Dean's mouth.
Later when I arrived back at the bunker, I found Sam stressing out over how to get Dean back. My heart sank when he looked over to me and I saw how broken he looked. There was no other way to help him... to get Dean back. I saw it in his eyes when he stared at me, like he had failed. The fact that Sam had already given up means that there was no way I was going to find something. What would be the point? Sam was better at everything and more confident than I was and I was already slipping under the pressure of trying to get my Dean back.
"Then we know what we have to do," I said slowly, watching Sam's face change into something I couldn't quite read. My tone caught me off guard, it sounded lifeless. Sam stood and left the bunker without a word and I just stood there, looking in the direction of where Dean was being held. My grip tightened around the knife in my pocket and without another word, I went to confront the demon.
That wasn't my Dean because my Dean was dead.
Yeah... I am so sorry about this. It wasn't what I was exactly hoping it would be but like, I kinda of forgot about this chapter for a few months. Uh, I am back?
Chapter 6: Can't Scare Me Off - Misha x Male OC
Jared, Jensen and Misha all decided to play a prank on the newest cast member. The man was nearly as serious as his character when it came to his work and they desperately tried to get him to laugh, even David Haydn-Jones himself. He was playing one of the other British Men of Letters characters and he was actually Scottish, which some of the cast members thought to be cute.
Outside of his work he was goofy and easy going but the man was like a huge boulder and hard to move away from his goal.
His name was Felix Wilson.
Felix was currently walking around the set after the night was over, deciding to go out for drinks with the guys. His messy light brown hair was never styled outside of his character and he looked a whole lot more happy. A smile graced his features, and it was one that many people said that could light up the room.
He ran forward, sneaking up behind Jared. An impish grin spread across his face as he jumped on Jared's back, startling him. Jared let out a small 'eep' before nearly falling and Felix busted out in a laugh, alerting Jensen and Misha to his presence. His cheeky grin made Jared laugh and shake him off.
"Dude, I didn't even know you were behind me," Jared huffed.
"That's your fault. I'm a master of stealth, mate," Felix purred out with a wink before finger gunning him and turning around to face Jensen and Misha. "So what you got planned for me tonight? Anythin' I got to be on the lookout for?" He laughed, eyeing them up and down in suspicion.
The three men shifted awkwardly at his quick perception and he just smiled, a mischievous twinkle in his eyes as he just shrugged it off. He knew they were planning something, but he wouldn't easily be scared off.
"Well, just forget it. Okay, mates?" He said with an adorable smile. The man walked past them, winking at Misha and Jensen, "unless you are planning something kinky?" He teased before pinching Misha's cheeks and then running ahead.
"Hey! Now that's not nice!" Misha called out, the others running after him.
After they had made it to the bar, Felix called out for shots of vodka for himself, sticking his tongue out at the others. He drank a few and then Felix made a bet that he could get one of the pretty bartender's numbers. Jared was cheering him on and Felix did eventually end up getting her number, shooting her a wink afterwards. She just rolled her eyes and walked off.
"See, told you guys I'd get her number. Also, you guys are kinda actin' funny. More specifically, Misha," Felix called out. "What's the occasion? Just to relax or are you guys just trying to scare me off?" He joked.
"Well, you're the only one that actually hasn't been affected by our pranks on the set," Jensen huffed, making Felix grin. The younger man tilted his head, his brown eyes swirling with mischief.
"Is that so?" Felix hummed, tossing back another shot. "See, I'm an actor for a reason you know. Just because I don't react, doesn't mean I don't want to laugh. I almost broke so many times and you should be surprised by the fact I haven't. I'm the easiest person to make laugh, I just take the job seriously," he told them, resting his head on his hand.
"Easiest!?" Jared exclaimed as if he couldn't believe it. "Dude, you're by far the hardest person to make laugh! David is easier than you!" He pointed out, making Felix smile.
"Then I must have mastered the art of self control!" Felix laughed. "By the way, if you want a reaction out of me I would try not squeezing my arse," he teased, "I don't think it comes with the reaction you want," he smirked. Jensen and Jared snorted in laughter and Misha blushed, earning a wink from Felix.
Misha had actually come the closest to getting a reaction out of Felix than anyone and it had started with squeezing the slightly smaller man's ass. Although the reaction that Misha would have gotten out of him wouldn't have been he one he wanted because Felix had thought of it as a challenge. Felix grinned, standing up and checking the time.
"Well, I need to get going 'cos I want to be up early," Felix hummed. "By the way, Misha," he added, leaning down so his face was near Misha's. He grabbed the other man's face and kissed him straight on the lips, startling Misha. It took a second before Misha actually kissed back and Felix was more surprised by that than he let on. He licked Misha's bottom lip before pulling away and winking. "You can't scare me off. Also, thanks for the good snog~" he said, grinning wildly as he walked away.
Felix left Jensen and Jared speechless and shocked and Misha embarrassed, covering his face in his hands.