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It's Time To Let Go

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The managers has said we would be able to have a break for 2 weeks after their busy comeback.

Everyone in the dorm went chaos as they hear the information. Some was planning their 2 weeks together some were just pure happy to be having a little break from the spotlight.

I look around and the atmosphere is full of joy and excitement. I was planning to stay at the dorm for sometime just enjoying the quiteness however i also wanted to enjoy having fun outside the dorm with sunlight and pure joy of just enjoying the trip.

They might think I just wanted to stay at the dorm just like woozi, however, scoups and jeonghan ask if he would want to join them in some place they were going to go.

I was fine nobody ask me if I would want to join in with them but I was kinda waiting for minghao or wonwoo to ask or tell me what their plan was for the break.

They never come to talk to me, instead they run off out of the door with the rest 96 liners and 98 liners having fun outside sunshine.

I look through the group chat and see that they have shared photos of minghao, Wonwoo, mingyu being together squished and stylishly posing for the camera. Scoups and jeonghan was out to the country side catching the train together.

I look through the others was busy shopping or going to kareoke. I'm just home alone the once cramp dorm seems so big now.

I decided to watch some dance video on youtube and trying to make myself motivated to do something. I come accross a fan video of wonwoo and minghao's ships.

Ships? I watch them and it suddenly hits me...

On the video minghao looks so happy around mingyu but when they showed clips of me and him together his face seems to be always unpleased or diaturb by my tactics..

Am I that unpleasant? Am I that annoying? Does he nlt like me? Is he always annoyed at me?

I scroll down to the comments section and i found people find minghao cute whenever he look at mingyu and then.. Theres people who said "I dont think he likes jun very much, look at his annoyed face everytime he do something."

It hit me.

maybe theyre right, maybe I do annoyed them alot..

Maybe he needs a break from me after all..

I scroll and scroll down the comment section and found someone said "haha he look so irritated watching junhui, I remembered when wonwoo said in one fansign that all of the 96 liners is his bestfriend except junhui hahahah"

It hurts.

I reread the comment once again then I turn off my phone and put it beside my bed. I hug my pillow so tight and tears fall down to my cheeks.

If they could see it so clearly, am I the only one thats blind and did not see that all this time?

 

I decided to text minghao and wonwoo

"where are you?"

They didnt respond until an hour later and said

'out eating'

I let out a heavy breath, wow okay.. I scroll up through my conversation with minghao it was me with long sentences and him replying with short replies.

 

Wonwoo then replied 30 minutes after minghao and said

'drinking coffee'

I roll my eyes and just turn off my phone and went to sleep.

I was awoken by the loud thump from the living room and laughter I get out of my room and see, minghao and wonwoo clinging to mingyu and they seem to be having so much fun.

I was suprised when i was backhugged by joshua as he said "hey junnie, how was your day," he whispered.

I turn around and smiled for the first time today..
"it was alright," half meaning my words.

Josh look at my face and squished my cheeks "i missed you junnie" he then hugged me tightly.

I smiled and hugged him back. I feel like joshua has this instincts whenever someone is down he would be there. Joshua just know how people feels..

He hold on to my hand tightly for the whole night even at dinner and when its time to sleep he said "can I sleep at your bed tonight?" i was suprised but i nod smiling sheepishly.

He then take me to my bed and hold on to me until morning comes. When i woke up josh was still there he said good morning and pinch my cheeks again.

"Are you feelling okay junnie?" josh ask
"Yeah, why?" I ask blankly.
"You were distant yesterday" josh stated
He look at me at the eyes and hug me again and then whispered, "Let go if you want to, I'm here for you, if youre in pain tell me"
He hold on to me so tightly, to assure me that hes with me and I give him a sad smile.

 

"I feel like only I like them, only i give the effort to give my time and affection for them," I whimpered as sob started to come out.

Josh caress my back and hug me softly and listened to my feelings for minghao and wonwoo.

"junie, maybe wait sometime and if youre still in pain try to let go.. You got to find someone that loves you like you love them" josh stated, he hold on to me a few more minutes and then he take me to the living room.

Everyone is there ready to go out again, eating their meal, some acknowledge us and when i see minghao on the right and wonwoo on the left stuffing rice to their face trying to quickly go, my heart dropped. Josh squished my hand, i look at his face then give him a sad smile.

Josh stayed at home for sometime but then said he had made plans with hansol and i said it was fine i just needed sometime to think. He said i could join them but i declined i need the headspace to think what im feeling.

Woozi also goes to the recording studio making new songs. I smiled at josh as he said bye.

For the next day its just a repetition of before, they sometimes acknowledge me even mingyu text me more than both of them combined for the past year.

 

I decided to let them go. It's time.

 

My day was just a normal dul day until i got a text.

"Where are you, do you want to meet?"

The one and only Yanan.

I smiled. After 2 days sleeping in sorrow he makes my day bright.

"im in my dorm, lets meet up at a cafe" i texted back.

He replied instantly, "okay, how about cat cafe"

I went ecstatic, yanan and cat what a plan.

"okay see you"

I arrived at the cat cafe waiting for yanan with iced chocolate in both hands.

I saw him.

He runs to me, and hug me tightly.

"juniee, how are you? Long time no see" yanan said

I smiled. A real smile.

"Im good, how are you? Have you recovered? Heres ice chocolate for you" I exclaimed.

He smiled, we went on and on about our lives after the show has finished. He got his free time and the space he neede from spotlight and i also told him about my conflicted feelings for minghao and wonwoo. 

We took pictures and i took pictures of him with cat. 

"can you please send me the photos" yanan request. 

"of course my friend," i said winking at him.

He flinches but we laughed together. 

I send the pic and after i send it i also said 

"we look good together" through text with winking face emoji. 

"did you get the pics" I ask, 

Yanan look at his phone and said "noo, are you sure you sent it?" 

I checked my phone and checked who i send it to.. 

 

I accidentally send it to the group chat. 

Im screwed. 

 

Suddenly I got a lot of notifications. 

Here we go... 

 

Seungkwan: is that yanan from pentagon? 

Scoups : jun.. YOURE OUT OF THE DORM

joshua: you guys look so cute 

Dino: hyung where are you? 

Jeonghan: are you at CAT CAFE?!! 

DK : hyungg, I want to meet him too.. 

Hoshi: junnie your smile is like the cat 

Woozi : jun, youre out? 

Mingyu : hyung, you look so happy... 

Vernon: waaaa cuteee. 

minghao: jun, where are you?? 

Wonwoo: cat cafe... we planned to go to cat cafe together didnt we??? 

Seungkwan : and did you just said you guys look good together with wink emoji?! 

joshua: I SHIP IT!!! 

jun: uhh.. Sorry wrong chat room i was meant to send that to yanan only hahahhabaha..yea im at a cat cafe, thank you joshua hyung.. Hahahha he look ao cute doesnt he. 

 

I facepalm myself. I look up to yanan and he smiled, "We do look good together" he smiled. 

But then my phone is bombered with notifications. 

Minghao: jun why didnt you tell me youre hanging out with yanan...

Jun: why? youre busy anyway.

Minghao: we all can hangout together mingyu and wonwoo wants to meet yanan too. 

Jun: he has to go soon. 

Minghao: are you close by? 

Jun: no, we're far away..

Minghao: jun just for a little while..? 

 

I ignore his texts after that.

 

Wonwoo: jun, which cat cafe are you at? 

Jun: a cat cafe.. 

Wonwoo: I mean where? 

Jun: far a way.

Wonwoo: why did you go to cat cafe without telling me? 

Jun: youre busy.

Wonwoo: you could've tell me so we can make arrangement. 

 

I ignore both of their text after that then I hold on to yanan hand and ran out of the cafe, I turn off my phone and hangout with yanan without a care of both of them. 

So they care when I hangout without them and ignore me when I was free and not ask me if I want to hangout with them?? 

Yanan and I go eat plenty of street food and play at a carnival, i laugh and eat plenty of good food. It was going dark so i suggested its better if we both go home and yanan agree but I also said we should hangout again. 

Yanan got picked up by his manager whilst i catch the taxi to go home.

We said our goodbyes and hug each other. Today was so much fun I didnt know it was getting dark.

I turn on my phone inside the taxi and as its on my phone  blow out with notification of missed calls and texts 20 missed call from minghao 15 missed calls from wonwoo. 30 texts from wonwoo and 2 text from joshua and 10 texts from minghao. 

I checked joshuas text

Joshua: juniee are you having fun? 

Joshua: i hope youre happy.. 

I smiled at joshua's text. 

I checked my other texts 

Minghao: jun why are you not answering

Minghao: are you still with yanan? 

Minghao: we all can hangout together 

Minghao: jun hyung 

I decided not to look further from minghao.

Wonwoo: junnie, where are you

Wonwoo: we want to hangout with yanan too

Wonwoo: jun, why are you not picking up your phone? 

Wonwoo: juniee, was the cat cute?

Wonwoo: junie please answer my calls

Wonwoo: we're on the way home 

Wonwoo: do you need anything? 

 

I close my phone. Its funny they didnt even acknowledge me the past 2 days and now since im out and happy and not answering their phone for a couple of hours they suddenly wants to know and text me more than ever. 

 

Im right infront of the dorm, i checked the time 7 pm they might already finished dinner so i wont be seeing both of them in the living room. 

I open the door then walk slowly to the main room and there they are sitting on a table with plates untouched and food right infront of them. 

 

I didnt acknowledge them as i'm too tired to deal with them. 

"Jun, lets eat together" they both stated. 

I turn my head and said "I already ate sorry, good night" I was this close to open mu bedroom until they blocked my view and turn me around to sit on the dining table with them.

"Why didnt you guys it before, and wheres the others?" I ask.

"we were waiting for you, they ate outside" wonwoo replied 

"Why didnt you guys tag along? And wheres mingyu" i ask again. 

"Mingyu hangout with jungkook and the rest" minghao answered. 

"oh thats why" i mumbled under my breath

I faced both of them and said "well enjoy your dinner, I'm tired" i got up once again trying to leave them in peace. 

I decided to let both of them go so i will stick to it. 

"Are you ignoring us?" wonwoo question 

But i didnt stop I just walk and close my room door and went to sleep as tear fall down. 

The next morning i woke up early and had cereal as breakfast and get ready quickly. I woke up joshua and said i will be gone he nods. 

I went for practice from early morning then j would hangout with yanan through the day. 

I texted scoups where i am and said i would be home late as I will be practicing. 

I got home very late and see the members watching movie as they sleep on the couch together like a bunch of puppies. I chuckle but run off to sleep. 

One week of rest is finished. 

Wonwoo and Minghao even make a groupchat for us 3 no one else 

And inside is 

Minghao: are you practicing today jun? 

Wonwoo: until what time? 

Minghao: scoups told me you practice everyday for the past week

Wonwoo: did you sleep? Why didnt see you coming in? 

Minghao: jun 

Wonwoo: jun

Jun: yes, i dont know until night 

Wonwoo: you answered! 

Minghao: i came yesterday at 12 you warent there 

Wonwoo: where were you? 

Jun: out

Minghao: with who?

jun: why? 

Wonwoo: we want to hangout too 

Jun: im busy

Minghao: but you said you were out?

Jun: yes with yanan, happy? 

Wonwoo: no

Minghao: come home 

Jun: no

Jun: you guys just hangout with one another or another member theres mingyu or wozi hyung theyre free

Minghao: no 

Jun:??? Well i will be home late so... 

Jun: why do you want to hangout with me all of a sudden? 

Wonwoo: im jealous

Jun: what? with who? 

minghao: ... who else? 

jun: jungkook? Idk mann.

Wonwoo: why would we? 

Jun: i dont know maybe because mingyu hangout with mingyu alot? 

Minghao: omfg wonwoo 

Wonwoo: omfg junn 

Jun: what?! 

Minghao: come home 

Jun: no im busy with yanan

Wonwoo: (¬_¬)

Jun: guys yanan is so cute.. I love him.

Minghao: no you dont

Wonwoo: junnie no. Hmph

Jun: hes so cute he just kiss me.. I think im in.. Love

Minghap: where did he kiss you?!!!

Wonwoo: jun. did you kiss him back?! 

Jun: i kiss him back and uwu my stomach have butterflies and he said i can stay over his dorm 

Wonwoo: ... minghao lets go

Jun: i said yes. 

Minghao: where are you right now?!

Jun: we're eating kimbap near the company.. AHHH HE kissed me again holy crap!

 

Minghao and wonwoo rushed over to the once place that jun love so much where theres kimbap. They found jun eyes sparkle lookinh at yanan and yanan have one of his soft smile that would make everyone melt. 

 

Minghao instantly sit next to yanan while wonwoo sit next to jun on the other side. 

"Oh hey Yanan, what a coincidence to see you here" minghao smile sheepishly. 

Wonwoo then hold his hand up and sajd "Hi my name is wonwoo" wonwoo said. 

They shook hands then jun face turn to amused and confused. 

before jun can say anything minghao phone rings he answer his phone then hangup. 

"scoups said we need to be back its urgent" minghao exclaimed

Wonwoo then pulled juns hand jun screamed his goodbye to yanan. 

 

When they arrived at the dorm there was no one. Jun look around "wheres the others yiu said urgent?" he asks confused.

"we lied, we bring you here so we can talk" wonwoo said 

"what?!" jun exclaimed.

"we love you dammit" minghao said 

"huh?! Haha minghao youre funny" jun laugh

"wow this is so funny, i let you guys go, found someone that love me then love someone else and here you both sayimg you love me" jun ramble. 

"what do you mean you let us go?" wonwoo said

"I stop loving both of you" jun stated

"why? We're close why did you want to let us go?" minghao frustrated hearing juns words

"well infront of camera when i show my affection you dont care or not even interested sometimes disgusted and fans saw that and your statements that im not even your friend it hurt me and even at home you dont acknowledge me this past week you run off with mingyu and seem to be in love with him  and when i text you answered shortly so i let you go completely and damn yanan said he love me he said he will treat me better than you guys ever will" jun let out his outburst and ready to close his room door.

Wonwo hug him from behind so tight. "you misunderstand the whole thing" he then give juns neck tiny kisses. 

Minghao kisses jun's tears away from his cheeks 

"we love you, infront of camera we dont really show you our affection and we are sorry about that but when we hangout with mingyu it was because we both got a big fight of who love you better and mingyu is there to calm ourselve and yes we dont answer much on text because we take you for granted and please dont love anybody else other than us we get jealous everytime you hangout with yanan and you saying you guys looks good together on group chat makes us jealous" wonwoo said.  

They both give jun plenty of kisses everywhere on juns neck, face, hand minghao and wonwoo give a couple hickeys on his neck and collarbone and behind his ear. They hug him on his bed through the night. 

Wonwoo and minghao woke up stare at jun's sleeping face then they both kiss juns cheeks.  

Jun woke up smiling, "Did i tell you yanan kiss me yesterday? It was mesmerizing" juns eyes sparkle. Wonwoo and minghao growl and said under their breath "where?!" 

Jun answered "my cheeks and neck" jun said proudly. 

Minghao and wonwoo is possessive over jun but glad that jun didnt let yanan kiss him on his lips. 

"my lips are only for special people only" jun winked to both of them and they both kiss him on the lips. 

They walk out of his room then, everyone who was in dining room exchange money. 

Chan and mingyu screamed out "whipped" 

Joshua smiled and give his money to hoshi as hoshi said "give me money yall cause i guess it right they are whipped for wen jun hui and JEALOUS" he laughed loudly. 

Vernon then give jun a kiss on the cheek out of a sudden and then he smirk at wonwoo and minghao as vernon said "my bestfriend" jun hugs back while wonwoo hold on to jun and minghao roll his eyes.

 

Maybe holidays could be more fun from now on.