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Rainbow

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She had never been big on country music, the constant twang and oftentimes ridiculous lyrics about dogs and making love on top of a pickup truck (how was that even comfortable? The bed of a pickup truck, she could get, but the top of one? No. Just no.) made her roll her eyes and change the station more than anything else. Living in a small area heavily populated with cowboys (and aliens) didn’t give her that many options for radio stations though and sometimes she had to make due. Lately though…Well lately, she’d been listening on purpose, just dying to get that excited rush from randomly hearing The Song. The only one that she’d ever heard that explained the man she couldn’t get out of her thoughts so perfectly. The song that explained the man that she was quickly finding she’d gladly follow to the end of this planet…and the next…and the next…

She puts her key into the ignition and a slow smile came to her lips when the soft notes start to fill the car. There were always flashes of moments both good and bad that came to her mind with each verse. Opening her mouth to sing along softly along with the lyrics, she changes lanes, the desert sun going down softly in the background, illuminating the landscape around her in pinks, oranges, and blues like a stunning sherbet scene that matches her mood perfectly. 

“When it rains it pours but you didn’t even notice/It ain’t rainin’ anymore, it’s hard to breathe when all we know is/The struggle of staying above, the rising water line/Well the sky is finally open, the rain and wind stop blowin’/But you’re stuck out in the same old storm again” 

The thing about that line is just that it was so true. It ran along the vein of their relationship. From that ill-fated first date in high school when they had decided to finally try to be a them, instead of a him and a her only to have had that opportunity ripped away by tragedy so quickly after. They were always around the corner from another tragedy, so they stayed in Fight mode. They made sure the other one was taken care of, always, but it was so difficult to put one’s guard down, to let themselves get too comfortable inside of any lull of that rang of peace and comfort. 

“You hold tight to your umbrella, darlin’ I’m just tryin’ to tell ya/That there’s always been a rainbow hangin’ over your head/If you could see what I see, you’d be blinded by the colours/Yellow, red, and orange and green, and at least a million others” 

She saw those colors. Every damn time that she looked at him. She’d seen them since youth. She had seen them even when he was breaking her heart with the truth that had he had kept from her for so many years. She sees them whenever he tells her that he loves her. She sees them when he smiles at her from across the room. They explode behind her eyelids whenever they kiss (much like he makes all the lights in the house do, when they really get into it). She sees them even when he can’t see them, when he gets so down on himself and talks about how he doesn’t deserve her…She sees them so fucking always. He was so golden and she promised herself every day that one day she’d make him see it, too. 

“So tie up your bow, take off your coat and take a look around/‘Cause the sky is finally open, the rain and wind stopped blowin’/But you’re stuck out in the same old storm again/You hold tight to your umbrella, darlin’ I’m just tryin’ to tell ya/That there’s always been a rainbow hangin/ over your head/Oh tie up your bow, take off your coat and take a look around/Everything is alright now/‘Cause the sky is finally open, the rain and wind stopped blowin’/But you’re stuck out in the same old storm again” 

She pulls into the dirt in front of his house, parking the car and thinks for a moment about how calm everything had been lately. For a bit, it had truly felt like their universe would never get to this point. Every day, they were learning more and more about the history of the crash and the history of a planet she’d never get to go to, one that a part of her was always afraid he’d decide he did, indeed, want to leave to go home to. She knew he loved her, she knew how much he loved her, and all the things that he would willingly give up for her. She also knew that if he were to decide he wants to go back to his home planet, she wouldn’t stop him. If he were to decide to go home, somewhere he could be well and truly safe, how could she begrudge him of that? So she liked to take every moment that she had now and tuck them all inside of her, letting them fill her in the best way. Every kiss, every time he looked at her, every sweet word, every touch…All of it. It was all saved deep inside of her in a place she’d never let anyone get to, a place she’d never let anyone but them touch. 

“‘Cause the sky is finally open, the rain and wind stopped blowin’/But you’re stuck out in the same old storm again/Let go of your umbrella, darlin I’m just tryin’ to tell ya/That there’s always been a rainbow hangin’ over your head/Yeah there’s alway sbeen a rainbow hangin’ over your head/It’ll all be alright” 

She rose her hand to knock on the door, the butterflies in her stomach knocking around at the knowledge that she was only moments away from seeing him. Her fist never hit the door, though, because he was already there, opening the door, ready for her, still anticipating her every move, that smile that he had reserved for her and only her spread across his face. Looking up and smiling back, she’s unable of wasting even another moment and closes the space between them, tasting his mouth against hers, the rest of the world burning bright and fading into the sherbet sky hanging over the desert night.