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“Were you even going to tell me? or were you going to wait until you had already left before even saying a word to me?” You ask, your back to Steve, arms crossed over your chest, you’re trying hard not to cry.

“Sweetheart I…”

“Everyone else knew, even Peter who isn’t even going knew, I was the last to find out, it’s like I don’t even fucking matter anymore.” You lose that battle with the tears halfway through speaking, covering your eyes with your hand.

“My love no.” He rushes up behind you and hugs you tightly to him, the feel of his uniform making you cry harder.

“Then why didn’t you tell me? It’s our anniversary Steve.”

You don’t ask if he forgot, you know he didn’t, he remembers everything always.

“I didn’t know how to tell you, i’m so sorry. I know we had plans.”

You refuse to turn around and look at him, “Plans that are now ruined. The mission is more important, i’ll never be as important as your work, i’ll always be second.”

“Sweetheart that’s not true.”

“Yes it is.” You whisper looking down, tears rolling down your cheeks as you share feelings that have gone on for far to long. You never had a issue with him being who he is, what you did have a problem with was his increasing workload and with it, you seeing him less and less.

“You’re always gone, I never see you anymore.” You swallow against the sudden words that come out of your mouth, “If you go on this mission…”You trail off not daring to finish.

Steve’s arms tighten around you almost painfully, “Please baby no..” Great you made him cry now too.

“I love you more then anything, but something has to change Steve, this isn’t fair. If you want a life with me then be here for it.” You whisper roughly.

His trembling hands turn you making you finally look up into his tearful eyes as tears run down his own cheeks, “I don’t wanna lose you doll, not ever.”

“Then stay.”

Normally that would have been his que to say he couldn’t the team needed him, but not this time. Now he just watches you for what feels like forever, ignoring the com unit beeping and just studies you deeply, “You’re right.” He finally says before hugging you tightly to him like he used too.

You breathe for the first time in months.