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do you know what's worth fighting for

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Something had gone wrong.

Steve had done enough of these ‘time heist’ journeys to know the feeling by now, and this one, it hadn’t even remotely felt like the others. He had just brought the last infinity stone back to its location in time and space before they had collected them and he had wanted to travel back to 2024 and Bruce and Sam and Bucky and a world without Tony.

But as soon as he had entered the quantum space he felt like he was being squeezed backwards, like he was completely taken apart and reassembled, with every piece of him just an inch further to the left. It was unsettling and Steve started to panic, but before the horror could properly take hold of him the time stream had already spit him back out.

Steve almost choked on the cool air and fell to his knees, his hands searching for purchase in the leaves on the ground. It almost felt like he was back in his skinny body, having an asthma attack, and his panicked terror came back crashing down on him. Something was wrong, Steve could feel it in his bones. He took a deep breath in, counting to six, holding his breath while he continued, seven, eight nine, ten, then breathing out again. Fourteen. Fifteen.

His heart was still beating too fast, but Steve stood back up and was finally able to take in his surroundings. There was a cute little house besides a lake right in front of him. Tony’s house. The house where Tony had been happy with Pepper and his daughter, but there was an eerie silence setting down over it now.

“Hello?”, Steve called out, slowly moving towards the house and looking for a sign that might tell him what year it was. He didn’t want to call out for Tony in case he was back in the present, but it hadn’t felt like the present he had left would be the one he was returning to.

There were no toys on the veranda, no plants except for a dead looking cactus in a tiny pot. Steve knocked on the door. “Tony?”, he heard himself say, biting his lip afterwards, but it was too late, the name had slipped out already.

“Who is it?”, a voice answered.

Steve had to grip the door frame to not fall back over. He was not over it. No matter how much time had passed in his perception since that day, since he had seen Tony’s body there on the battle field, he wasn’t ready.

“It’s me”, Steve choked out. “Steve.”

After that, there was a loud bang. Steve had not tried to open the door yet since the house was occupied and he was a polite man, but he was reaching for the door handle when the door suddenly got pulled open with enough force that it banged against the wall.

“What the fuck!”, Tony yelled, and Steve had no time to process the fact that his hair was still dark without a single sliver of grey nor the fact that there was a perfectly round, glowing shape under his shirt because Tony had already pushed him backwards with all his might.

Startled, Steve blinked and didn’t move a single inch, supersoldier being supersoldier. “Huh! That was unexpected.”

Tony on the other hand looked like he was considering to put on the suit, his cheeks reddened and his breathing fast while he was staring at Steve like he wasn’t entirely convinced he wasn’t hallucinating. “How dare you! Show up here! After that!”

Oh. Maybe Steve had travelled back to after Civil War?

“I’m sorry Tony, can we maybe go inside? To have a conversation.” Steve tried to sound reasonable, but not condescending. He knew that Tony hated nothing more than being told what to do in a voice that made him feel stupid. He’d made this exact mistake so many times before, he wouldn’t now. When it might count. When it might be the last time he’d ever see Tony.

Exhaling loudly, Tony stepped aside. “Get your spangled ass in here, then.” He closed the door a little more forcefully than might have strictly been necessary and glared at Steve.

Steve looked around, almost frowning when he took in the sleek modern furniture that clashed with the comfy aura the lake house exuded on the outside. This was clearly Tony’s own doing; his taste in furniture had always been questionable at best.

Deciding on a black leather chaiselongue as the least offending object, Steve walked over to it and sat down with a sigh. Tony stalked to a very Bauhaus looking armchair that could’ve come straight from his dentist’s waiting room and faced Steve. “Well?”, Tony asked, his voice sounding strangled. “Have a go at that conversation then.”

Steve cleared his throat and leaned forwards. “What year is it?”, he asked. There was no point in beating around the bush.

Tony lifted an eyebrow, curiosity clear in his voice: “2019.”

“I’m from 2024”, Steve explained and closed his eyes for a moment. “Did Thanos snap?”

“Yeah”, Tony gave back. “And then we undid it and kicked his ass. And then you disappeared and left us all alone because we apparently don’t even win together anymore, do we?”

Steve shook his head in confusion. “Wait a moment.” That couldn’t be. “How did you undo it? Where was I? The other 50% are back though? What happened to Thanos?”

“Slow down there with the questions, Capsicle.” Tony stood up and went to his liquor cabinet to pour himself a drink. “Short version: I invented time travel. Yes, we brought everyone who disintegrated in the snap back. Thanos is dead. Thor chopped his head off. You were there for all of this! I have no fucking clue where you went afterwards, though. Care to explain?” Tony gripped the tumbler in his hands tightly, his knuckles turning white. Steve was worried he’s smash the glass and cut himself, so he got up and gently took it out of Tony’s hand.

“I think I fucked up... time”, he replied quietly, the feeling of panic and horror from earlier swirling in his guts in a prickly feeling until he looked into Tony’s eyes. It was ridiculous, it shouldn’t be that way, but as soon as he looked at Tony, close enough to smell his aftershave, he calmed down. It would be okay. “In any case, I tried to get back to the present, to 2024, where we won against Thanos. But... I ended up here.”

“Ah”, Tony replied. He narrowed his eyes at Steve’s explanation and Steve could see his brain working. Looking up at Steve, he cocked his head a bit. “We’re in the present. You won’t be able to go back to where you came from because we closed the time stream. It was the only way to keep the changes we made in the past in the past.”

Steve swallowed. “I don’t understand.”

With an eyeroll, Tony took the tumbler out of Steve’s hand and gestured for them to sit back down.

And then Tony explained. The tumbler of whiskey turned into dinner and while Tony was doing the dishes, Steve sat at the kitchen table, brooding.

~
It turned out that what had happened in this reality wasn’t so different from what he had experienced. In 2018, Thanos had collected the infinity stones and snapped. Tony had made it back to Earth a couple of days later and they had gone to Thanos garden planet where Thor had chopped his head off. Then Scott had tumbled out of the quantum realm and Tony had invented time travel five years earlier than he’d done in what Steve had experienced as his reality. They had collected the infinity stones from the past, Bruce had snapped everyone back into existence – and somehow no other version of Thanos had realised what they were doing and had stayed where he belonged: in the past. With their ‘time heist’ successful and the universe in balance again, they had brought the stones back to where they had taken them from.

Except, Steve had never come back from that mission.

“That’s the last time we saw you. That was a couple months ago. You never came back from where you were supposed to place the stones back in 2012. We thought you’d maybe taken the chance to return to the 40s”, Tony had said over the curry he had heated up for dinner for them. He had looked like he had a lot of thoughts about Steve possibly returning to the 40s, but he’d kept them to himself. “Sam wanted to go look for you, but Bucky convinced him not to.”
“I would never do that to you”, Steve had interjected, horrified. He would never leave the team behind like that.

“Well”, Tony had said with a sour expression on his face. “Wasn’t like we could’ve known that you were somehow still traipsing through the time stream. So after we all returned, Strange sealed the time stream off.”

While Tony had taken another bite of his curry, Steve scrubbed a hand over his face. “What does that mean?”

“It means, we still changed things in the past. I think you fought yourself in the past. Things like that. It would’ve created a paradox. For example... let’s take an easy example. There’s a cake in the past and you time travel to eat a slice. Even if no one saw you, the person who would’ve originally eaten the slice of cake can now not do so. What happens now? It’s a paradox. Even if you bring the cake back – there is now somewhere, somehow, a reality where the person couldn’t eat their slice of cake. How will this impact the person’s future? It sounds ridiculous when it’s a cake, but every action in the past can have repercussions.” Tony had looked at Steve and licked his lips, putting his fork down. “Now I want cake.”

“Focus, Tony”, Steve had said with a smile that was maybe a little too much on the fond side. “I understand that. But didn’t bringing the stones back erase that issue? The extra reality that got created just gets cancelled out again, no?”

“Well, no. You spoke to people in the past, they have seen you, what if they try to speak to past-you about that encounter?” Tony had leaned back in his seat. “If you mess with the past, you create paradoxes. First rule of time travel.”

With a deep sigh Steve had leaned back as well, he hadn’t eaten much, but he was a bit too confused to enjoy Tony’s curry. “Okay, paradoxes. And now Strange did what?”

“To avoid that time would collapse in itself he sealed it off. So whatever changes we made, they stay in the past, the outcome – or our present – stays unaffected by it.” Tony had pulled a face. “If you think about it, we could’ve brought back with us every dead person we care about, or talked to them one more time or something, and it wouldn’t have changed a thing.”

“But?” Steve had frowned. He was starting to get a headache from all this time talk.

Tony had sighed and shoved his plate to the side so he could cross his arms in front of his chest and lean on them. “But, Strange sealed it off to avoid exactly that. The past is in the past. We have to understand that. We can only influence the future, at least we perceive the world around us this way, and messing with this perception is not good for anyone.”

“That makes sense”, Steve had admitted. “So Strange made it impossible for what we did in the past to influence the future.”

Nodding, Tony had looked intently at Steve. “He explained it like he cauterised a wound in the time stream. Or like gluing the holes we poked into the time stream shut.” Tony had smiled a sad little smile. “You won’t be able to go back where you came from except by aging, like the rest of us.”
~

Steve watched Tony dry the plates and put them in the drying rack. He wouldn’t be able to go back. It made sense, considering everything, he had felt like he had been blocked by something when he had tried to travel back to 2024. And maybe it wasn’t so bad: Tony was alive, Bucky and Sam were around. But this was the second time in his life that time left him stranded and he was entirely sick of it. Of time travel too.

“So what am I going to do now?”, Steve asked when Tony came back, drying his hands on the towel before throwing it on the counter.

“Do you want a pudding?” Tony looked at him with a tiny smirk on his face. “I don’t have cake but I might have some ice cream. Vanilla? Or strawberry?”

Perking up, Steve asked hopeful: “Both?”

Laughing, Tony bent over to open the freezer. “Can do.” He grabbed two cartons of ice cream and two spoons and motioned for Steve to go back to the living room. “I’m assuming you’re staying here tonight”, Tony said when Steve had sat down in front of the holographic tv screen on an ugly dark red sofa that looked like Tony might have stolen it from a Star Trek set.

Steve blushed, but took the ice cream tubs from Tony so he could sit down as well. “That... would be very nice.”

With a sigh, Tony snatched the vanilla ice cream back. “It’s okay. I’m sorry I tried to push you earlier. I shouldn’t have.”

Steve laughed and opened the strawberry one. “Believe me, you had more than enough reasons to. And it’s not like... it had any effect.” He tried to hide his smile by eating a large spoonful of strawberry icecream.

“Let me make it up to you?”, Tony said in a soft voice. Steve felt a tingle running down his spine, turning his head slightly to look at Tony’s face, his smile, his eyes. He looked so earnest and mischievous at the same time and it broke Steve’s heart to know how many times Tony had gotten hurt in the past by him.
“I –“ Steve didn’t know what to say. There was nothing he wanted more in this world than to hug Tony, but he still wasn’t entirely sure that this was his Tony. That he was Tony’s Steve. That he belonged into this world.

Tony interrupted Steve’s thoughts with a bright smile. “You can stay here for as long as you need, unlimited ice cream supply included. I know how long it took you to adjust when you woke up in the future. Now you’ve woken up in the past, but the wrong past. Must be frustrating.”

“It’s not the wrong past”, Steve said quietly. “It could never be the wrong past if – “ If you’re alive in it, Steve had wanted to say, and just so managed to stop himself.

“If?”, Tony asked, curious and so intently focused on Steve that he almost felt dizzy; Tony Stark’s full attention was really something.

Scrambling to find a good ending for his sentence, Steve lamely settled on: “If we won.”

“Hm.” Tony didn’t sound particularly convinced by that, but he snatched the strawberry ice cream from Steve and shoved the vanilla tub into his lap instead. “JARVIS, play the 2014 Godzilla please.”

Steve almost choked on the last spoonful of strawberry ice cream. “JARVIS?!”

“Good evening, Captain Rogers”, JARVIS smooth British voice said from the ceiling (or wherever Tony’s AI’s spoke from anyway).

“Oh. Yeah”, Tony said sheepishly. “I kind of brought him back after Vision died.” He ducked his head a bit as if he expected to be reprimanded.

“You missed him... it’s okay. I’m glad he’s back. Hello, JARVIS”, Steve replied as calmly as possible. Tony had probably had a couple fights with the team about this from the way he acted. But JARVIS had been ripped from him, who was he to dictate Tony if he was allowed to resurrect his AI or not? Steve guessed however that Wanda was not a regular guest around here and felt a pang of sadness and compassion for her loss.

“Thanks.”

Steve almost didn’t hear Tony over the sound of the opening credits of Godzilla, but he smiled. He felt like he was finally experiencing something real again, like he was able to feel something else than numbness and pain and whatever it was that made him able to do the being alive thing all day. Today had given him a lot to think about and Steve felt optimistic that he might finally be in time and space where he was supposed to.

 

#
The next couple of days had been slow. Steve adjusted to Tony’s life – mostly tinkering in his downstairs workshop and regular skype calls to Pepper and Peter Parker. Apparently Tony took regular time off from being Tony Stark by coming out here to his lake house. Peter was still one of his number one priorities and Steve was pretty sure he’d heard the boy call Tony ‘dad’ on more than one occasion; and Tony had already informed him that Peter came over every Saturday. After that, when Steve read up on the legalities of adoption in New York, he wondered if Tony was happy. Tony didn’t seem unhappy, but he wasn’t with Pepper anymore and Steve wondered if he was lonely. Of course not right now, Steve was here, filling notebooks with sketches and Tony’s fridge with exotic fruit and Tony’s evenings with conversation. But before Steve, and – even though Steve did not want to think about that yet – after Steve would leave again. It just wasn’t the same, was it? As much as Steve wished he could be to Tony what Pepper had been a couple of years ago, he knew it wouldn’t happen. He focused on trying not to disrupt Tony’s life too much until he had figured out what to do with himself.

One evening Rhodey came around and Tony roped Steve into cooking a fancy roast with a billion side dishes until Steve burned his finger on the oven roast. He made it through the evening with a band aid on his poor finger as if super soldier healing hadn’t taken care of it immediately and even let Tony take off the band aid in the bathroom after Rhodey had left.

“Just let me make sure it’s okay”, Tony said to Steve after sitting him down on the closed toilet lid and before he peeled the band aid off. The look on Tony’s face after realising that the slight burn wound had completely disappeared almost made Steve laugh. “Oh.” Tony was holding his salve in one hand and the crumpled up band aid in the other, staring at Steve’s finger like he couldn’t decide if he should be offended or not.

“You are adorable.”

Steve didn’t even realise he’d said it until Tony looked up, with his big brown eyes. “What?”

Well. Steve swallowed down his embarrassment and went with it. “You’re adorable and I like you a lot. Like. In a ‘you’re cute’ kind of way.” He bit his lip and tried to hold Tony’s gaze, feeling his cheeks heat up. That was maybe not as confident as he had hoped it would be.

“What?” Tony stared at him with a blank face, frozen like the proverbial deer in the headlights.

“I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable”, Steve whispered, suddenly overly conscious of how every word echoed in the bathroom and how Tony was kneeling on the cold tiles in front of him, still holding his finger in this hands.

Tony put the salve into the sink and grabbed Steve’s hand, holding onto it and pressing it to his arc reactor. “Do you feel this?”, Tony asked in a hoarse voice.
Steve only nodded, the warm thrum of the arc reactor strangely familiar under his fingers.

“I had to put it back in. There must have been pieces left that the surgery years ago couldn’t reach. I’ve been telling everyone that I’m taking the nanites everywhere but it’s not the nanites. Well, it still is. But they’re going a little deeper than they should. I’m broken. I’ve always been broken but the physical proof is back.” Tony’s fingers were shaking when he let go of Steve’s hand. “You broke a part off when you betrayed me for Bucky. I worked hard to patch it up and then you went and tore it off again, leaving me after Thanos.”

Steve took in a breath as if he wanted to object that he hadn’t left, that that wasn’t him, but Tony pressed a finger to his lips. “Now you say this?”, Tony went on quietly. “Now you say I’m adorable?” He didn’t sound mad, more resigned. As if he expected Steve to come to his senses now.
Steve felt a lump in his throat. “I’m so sorry, baby. I’m so sorry I hurt you like that back when... it wasn’t right. I’m so sorry I left you, even though that wasn’t me-me. You deserve better than that. I’m just... so sorry.”

Tony looked so soft and vulnerable with the way he looked at Steve. “What do you mean that wasn’t you?”

“Well, I personally didn’t do it?” Steve didn’t want to sound like it was an excuse, but he was also unsure if he wasn’t living a life that belonged to someone else. It felt like it was made for him – Tony being soft, a world with no immediate danger for the moment – and still, he feared he was taking what wasn’t his.

“You did”, Tony said. “You went into the time stream and you came back out. No matter what you experienced in the mean time, you’re still you. It’s still you who I wanted to punch in the face for what you did to me every time I saw your face after Civil War. It’s still you who I want to ki–“ Tony cut himself off. The fragility that had softened his features disappeared and the hard lines were back. “Nevermind.”

Tony got up and took one last look at Steve. “Maybe you should talk to Bucky and Sam about being... back. You can’t hide here forever.” And with that Tony disappeared out of the bathroom.

 

#
Steve did talk to Bucky and Sam. And the rest of the team, for that matter. Bucky gave him a hug that was strong enough to almost break Steve’s ribs and lectured him about the dangers of time travel until Steve swore up and down that he would never again attempt to somehow not experience time the same way everyone else on earth did. (Except for Dr. Strange and friends, obviously.) Sam told Steve about how his new Captain America duties were going; that the shield was still in one piece and Steve told him how proud he was to have such a worthy successor.

Sam also extracted the promise that he would come over for runs and dinners regularly, after offering Steve to move in with him and Bucky. Steve he had declined, even though he knew he’d have to work on his relationship – his friendship to Tony to make this arrangement work. Sam had smirked at him as if he knew something that Steve didn’t know yet, but if he was thinking about Steve’s crush on Tony – well, Steve knew about that.

On his way back, Steve got off the motorbike Tony had gotten for him and walked back into the forest, plucking a pretty flower here and there until he held enough that it was almost a small bouquet. He grabbed a couple leaves – or grass, Steve wasn’t great at identifying plant things; they were green things that seemed to go well with the rest of the wildflowers.

He walked back up to the house and put them into a vase, rifling through the cabinets until he found something that really seemed to be meant for a bouquet and not for a pint of beer. On the kitchen table was a little note that said that Tony would be back for dinner, he was out with Peter for a science project. It was signed with ‘your T.’ and Steve’s heart really shouldn’t have started to beat faster over that.

Determined to make a nice dinner for Tony he grabbed everything he needed for a vegetable lasagna and got to work, letting JARVIS play some 70s pop songs. Just when he was done, the lasagna in the oven and all surfaces clean again, he was humming along to ‘Waterloo’ and decidedly not wiggling his ass to the beat.

“That’s a nice surprise to come home to”, Tony commented and Steve immediately whipped around, embarrassed. “Hi”, Steve spluttered, trying to get the apron over his head and waving at the ceiling to get JARVIS to turn off the music. The AI turned the volume down, at least something.

“What are you doing home already? Didn’t Peter come over for dinner?”

Tony shook his head, taking in the flowers on the table and the amazing smell of the gently baking lasagna. “It’s project week and he had to meet with his friends to paint some planets. He’s going to come over on Wednesday instead.”

“Great”, Steve smiled. He liked having Peter over, and he liked even more how much Tony loved to have him over. “You’ll have to eat twice as much of the lasagna then.”

Tony laughed and came closer to take a look into the oven. “It smells really good.”

There was a beat of silence before Steve sat down at the table. “I went to Bucky and Sam today.”

Tony’s good mood seemed to evaporate immediately. “Oh.”

“They think I belong here too”, Steve said softly, watching Tony closely.

He just huffed and crossed his arms in front of his chest, and Steve was momentarily distracted by the way the open leather jacket accentuated his body.
Steve’s attention snapped back to Tony’s face when he said: “I told you so. There’s only one you.”

Nodding, Steve smiled. “Yeah, but I meant here... with you. If you’ll have me. I’ll spend every second trying to make up for my past mistakes.”

Tony made a choking noise and turned around to the tap to pour some water into a glass. He drained it, and put it down next to the sink.

“That’s not how it works, Rogers”, he said to the window.

Steve got up and approached Tony slowly. He didn’t want to give him the feeling of being trapped against the counter, but he also wanted to look into his face. “You didn’t kick me out when I showed up. You explained. You were patient. You’re letting me stay. Please, let me stay. Let us have this. There’s no more time to lose, is there?”

Tony abruptly turned around. “I tried to push you out the door, or have you forgotten?”, he protested weakly, his eyes searching Steve’s face for something.

Steve smiled. “You needed to be angry, Tony. You are unapologetically you, and I wouldn’t want you any other way. I’ve learned this.”

“I suppose you have.” Tony still looked like he was waiting for something, but the alarm from the oven interrupted them.

Steve hurried to take the lasagna out and their dinner conversation turned to their usual topics – today they speculated about Nick Fury. Or, er, gossiped. Apparently someone had heard something about an incident with a cat. When they cleaned the table – now using the dish washer since Tony apparently did not think of regularly washing two sets of dishes by hand as therapeutic – Steve hoped that Tony had forgotten about the only half finished conversation but Steve should’ve known better.

“If I let you in and you hurt me again, I will kick your ass”, Tony said suddenly, when Steve had just folded the towel. He was staring at Steve again with that look on his face. “And if you want to run-“, Tony swallowed hard, “you better do it now.”

“I’m not going to run”, Steve replied and with a couple of steps he was standing right next to Tony. If he took another step forwards their chests would be touching, and Tony would be pressed against the table behind him. “I’m going to stay for as long as you want me to.”

“What if I’m not ready for this?” Tony looked up at him, his gaze flickering from Steve’s left eye to his right and back.

“Then I’ll wait. I’ll work through it with you.” Steve took a deep breath. “Why are you looking at me like this? What are you waiting for?”

Tony didn’t reply. Instead, he took the step towards Steve. “I wish I could hate you.” With intent, Tony put his hands on Steve’s chest.

Steve could feel his heart beating fast, so fast, he was sure Tony could feel it. “I don’t want you to hate me.”

“Good.” And then Tony leaned up and kissed him. Steve had seen it coming, he was an idiot but not that much, and he looped his arms around Tony’s waist and pulled him closer. Their kiss wasn’t soft, it was passionate and their teeth knocked into one another and Steve was pretty sure that he had almost lifted Tony off his tiptoes at one point. But when they parted they were both smiling like the universe had finally done something right and kissed again just to make sure. To make sure it was real.

Tony’s hands ended up somewhere in Steve’s hair and Steve bit Tony’s bottom lip when he tugged a little too hard on his hair. The moan Tony let out made Steve want to put him on the table and have his way with him, but he pulled back, with difficulty.

“Do you want to take this to the sofa? Or the bedroom? Or-, oh fuck!“

Tony, apparently impatient to touch Steve as much as possible at all times, started to bite and kiss along his neck and had found a particularly sensitive spot right under Steve’s ear.

“Hmmm”, Tony made against the purpling flesh of Steve’s neck and licked it. “Bedroom.”

Steve moaned when he felt Tony’s hands slipping under his shirt and let his slide down over Tony’s back and over his ass. “Are you – are you sure? It’s not too fast? We can wait.”

Tony leaned in for another kiss and while it started with the same passion as before, it was so, so sweet. There was a feeling in it that made Steve’s head spin with more than just lust, that made his heart flutter and the butterflies in his stomach dance. And then Tony’s fingers brushed over Steve’s nipples as if by accident. “Please”, Steve babbled against Tony’s lips, helpless under his ministrations. “Please let me. Please!”

“You have to say what you want, baby”, Tony whispered back, his eyes big and liquid and so dark, Steve could’ve lost himself in them. “Let me fuck you”, he rasped out.

“Bedroom”, Tony agreed with a smirk; and then almost squeaked when Steve picked him up and carried him. “Fuck, that’s hot.”

Now it was Steve’s turn to smirk down at Tony. He hurried to the bedroom and softly put Tony down on the mattress. “Let me take care of you.”

Tony only nodded, his eyes focused on Steve when he crawled on top of him, kissing him again and touching him all over.

“Can I take off your shirt?”, Steve asked out of breath, when Tony had taken off his and thrown it into a corner of the room only to lean up and kiss and lick and bite every inch of his chest.

Tony tensed up a little, Steve could feel it because he had his arms around him and his face pressed against him and his heart ached. “Sorry, I-“

“No”, Tony interrupted. “I just. It’s ugly again.”

Steve made eye contact throughout as much time as possible while Tony took off his shirt, and then, when he lay there, his breath going quickly and his lips swollen and wet, his hair tousled, Steve said it. “I love you.” He leaned down and pressed a soft kiss to the arc reactor. “Every part of you. Always.”

Tony’s breath hitched and he looked at Steve with wonder. “What?”

“I mean it.” Steve caressed Tony’s face, pushed a couple of strand of hair out of his forehead and kissed him softly, on his nose, on his lips, little butterfly kisses down his throat. “You are the most beautiful person. And having proof of what you’re able to survive, of what you’re able to conceive with only your mind right here, right in front of me is making me so proud.”

“Ah”, Tony let out a soft gasp and Steve immediately wanted to hear it again when he felt how Tony’s hips jerked up against him and how hard he was.

He leaned forwards and pressed his erection against Tony’s thigh. “Do you want to hear how amazing you are? How compassionate and brave? You would give everything to keep people save. You have the biggest heart, and when you set your mind to something you can achieve anything.”

Steve opened Tony’s trousers and let his hand flutter over his dick, touching it, not touching it yet, until Tony whimpered. “If you let me”, Steve went on and slow pushed Tony’s trousers and pants down to his thighs, “I’m going to take you apart and put you back together. I’m going to keep you and cherish you.”

Tony’s cock twitched when he heard that and Steve smirked. He quickly pulled off Tony’s remaining clothing and threw it off the bed; letting his own jeans follow until they were both naked.

“Fuck”, Tony almost purred when he took in Steve’s naked body before he looped his arms around his neck and pulled him down until their bodies were flush.
They both moaned at the contact, hips snapping upwards to make that first contact between their cocks that much better. “Please, Steve!” Tony dug his fingers into Steve’s neck muscles before they slid down his back, taking in every indentation his muscles created there. “Please fuck me.”

“I will”, Steve whispered. He was pressing kisses to Tony’s neck while he let his hand explore over Tony’s abdomen and his thighs, rolling a bit to the side so he had better access but not touching Tony’s cock yet. “You deserve the attention. You’re so good for me, aren’t you? Look at how much you love this, you’re so beautiful.”

Steve slowly slid down Tony’s body, leaving a trail of hot kisses behind and Tony’s hands moved to Steve’s hair.

When Steve bit the inside of Tony’s thigh, Tony exclaimed a loud: “Ah, fuck me, Steve! Please, baby, please, I need it, I’ve wanted this for so long.”

Steve blew over Tony’s cock, straining and red and a bead of precum on the tip. “Such a pretty cock, so perfect, just like you.” Steve slowly licked a stripe over the underside before swallowing Tony’s cock down, letting his tongue dance over the head of it and bobbing his head a couple of times until Tony muffled his moan in a pillow.

“No,” Steve said, stretching his hand out to caress Tony’s cheek and to take the pillow away. “Let me hear you, baby. I want to hear the beautiful noises you make when you’re taking my cock like the good boy you are.”

Tony whimpered again, but he let Steve take away the pillow. Steve lifted Tony’s hips and put the pillow there instead, displaying him and spreading his legs. “Do you have lube?”

“Bedside drawer”, Tony replied and stretched to open it, throwing the bottle at Steve who caught it out of the air.

Tony was watching Steve, his every movement when he lubed up his fingers and started to massage Tony’s hole. “Hurry up”, Tony rasped out when Steve took his time to even dip the first finger inside. “I need you inside me!”

“And you’re begging for it so nicely.” Steve rubbed his hand over Tony’s thighs, leaning down to lick another bead of precum that had formed on Tony’s dick off. Tony mewled when Steve timed it with the thrust of his finger, adjusting the angle until he hit Tony’s prostate and Tony almost arched his back off the bed. “So beautiful. You deserve to be taken care of. You deserve so much love, baby, do you hear me?”

“Mh”, Tony choked out, he was moving his hips down against Steve finger, slowly fucking himself and it was not enough, he needed more –

One finger became two and two became three, but Steve was in no hurry. When Tony became too impatient in his wriggling Steve bit down on Tony’s thigh, leaving behind a nice bruise. “You’re doing so well”, Steve praised when Tony was covered in s slight sheen of sweat, fucked open by Steve’s fingers, Steve’s fingers around the base of his dick to keep him from coming. Steve was pressing down on Tony’s prostate again, and Tony was clenching the bed sheets in his hands, his breathing going so fast that every breath he took sounded like a little moan. “Do you want my cock instead to fill you up?”

“Please, please”, Tony whimpered, long since resolved to begging. He opened his eyes when Steve pulled his fingers back and moved back upwards so he could bend Tony’s legs back. Tony was lying there on his back, with the pillow under his ass, open and ready for Steve. “Look at you”, Steve whispered, aligning his cock with Tony’s hole but not yet pushing in, only pressing the tip against it. “Look at how flushed you are, the colour in your cheeks. Baby, you’re so perfect for me. You’re so good for me, for my cock. You’re going to feel so good around me.”

Steve pushed in with one hard thrust, nailing Tony’s prostate and making him scream. The overwhelming feeling of finally being inside of Tony took his breath away and Steve built up a rhythm, hard and deep and just on this side of slow.

“Yes, Steve, you feel so good, I love you”, Tony babbled against Steve’s lips when he leaned down to kiss him sloppily, more touching their lips together and breathing into each others mouth but it was the intimacy they were needing. Tony was holding onto Steve’s arms, squirming in his embrace to get closer, writhing under him every time Steve hit him at just the right spot.

“I love you too”, Steve replied out of breath, his arms framing Tony’s face on the mattress. “I love you so much, Tony, you’re mine, you’re mine!”

“Yes!” With a groan Tony tried to move even closer to Steve. “Please, make me come, please I need it, I’m yours!”

Steve reached down between them and wrapped his hand around Tony’s hard length. He was so caught up in Tony around in, in Tony under him, that his hand movements weren’t as refined as they could’ve been, but they got the job done. He jerked Tony off in the same rhythm of his thrusts. “Open your eyes for me, I want to look into your eyes when you come.” Steve was close as well and he knew that seeing Tony in ecstasy like that would be all he needed to climax.
“Steve!”, Tony moaned and he opened his eyes, his lips parted as well, when he came all over Steve’s hand. He was shaking, and Steve’s thrusts grew erratic before he came as well deep inside of Tony.

Steve slowly pulled out and rolled to the side, keeping his arm around Tony and pulling him on his chest. Tony immediately snuggled closer, pulling up the duvet with neither of them caring that they smeared lube and come all over the sheets.

Steve was still trying to catch his breath while Tony looked at his face. He was smiling, and he looked like he’d finally found what he was looking for. “I love you”, Tony said quietly.

“I know baby”, Steve gave back, pressing a kiss to Tony’s sweaty forehead. “I love you too. I love you so much.”

Tony scooted even closer and put his head down on Steve’s chest so he could listen to his heart beat. He felt safe, taken care of, very satisfied and a thorough warmth filled him from the inside; he wished they could stay like this forever; though he’d settle for the duration of a nap at first. “You’re not leaving me again, are you?”

“No baby.” Steve’s embrace got a little tighter and Tony contently closed his eyes. He would fight anything and anyone that dared to come between them. He wouldn’t let anything take this away, now that he’d finally gotten it. “I’m going to stay with you until the end of time.”

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