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Spies Like Us

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Aoyama Yuga had not expected most things in his life. (Yes, a shocker, as dazzling and fabulous as he is, sometimes life just gets the best of everyone, doesn’t it?) He didn’t expect his wonderful personality to be wasted when nobody even bothered to glance at him, let alone talk to him. He didn’t expect to stand out the least, even when he tried the hardest to twinkle brighter than any star. It was like he was invisible. Which may be the reason he was accepted to work for the French Government.

He also did not expect that.

To be fair, he was dragged into an unnecessarily dramatic situation that involved bribery and quite pathetic attempts to cheat in a test.

For a little context, the French Government was currently hiring, and Aoyama was all for it. Being a spy would surely get him the attention he wanted, in only a few months, he’d become the world’s most famous spy that would go down in history. He’d be rich and live in a mansion where his servants would serve him cubed cheese and red wine. He’d live the life of luxury, all the while taking on the many cases the French Government threw his way.

That is, if he passed the test to actually get into the French Government.

Aoyama had rocked up at the exam hall, sat at his assigned seat and felt quite good about the test. Although he would never admit it, Aoyama was a pretty darn smart cookie. Nothing could get past him once he knew something was up. Another trait to add to his dazzling set of attributes.

It was, until a few minutes before the test was due to start that a peculiar encounter was made. You see, sometimes people are just dumb or, don’t think enough things through well enough which leads them to make stupid decisions. Like drugs for example. Well, that’s not a very good example, drugs can be used for good things, like medical purposes. But you get the point. What mattered was that the boy who had just arrived was destined to make an otherwise horridly idiotic decision if the situation was different.

He seemed around Aoyama’s age, his left arm wrapped up in a cast and walking up to the doorway with a demeanor that suggested he owned the place. Aoyama could see it in his eyes. A sinister glint that could only mean one thing. He was planning something.

“Excuse me, Sir,” The test administrator man whose name was apparently Paul, said in a nasally voice, “If you would please take your seat.” He gestured to the free seat near the back of the large room next to Aoyama. When the boy made no effort to move from his position in the doorway, choosing to instead, to blow blond hair out of his eyes like it was some kind of fashion show. Aoyama’s hair was by far more superior.

The boy took something out of his coat pocket and waved it in the air for Paul and possibly everyone in the room to see. It seemed as if the man was blind because he squinted before sighing and walking over to the boy.

“There’s a hundred dollars in this wallet,” The boy said with a smirk. Ah, so that’s what that rugged looking piece of folded, fake leather was. Aoyama would never have guessed.

The boy waited to see if Paul would reply. Paul only stared, his face a mix of confusion and apprehension. When Paul did not reply, the boy added, “Or maybe there isn’t.”

Are you bribing me?” Paul asked incredulously, like the idea of it was blasphemy.

“What do you think?”

Paul scoffed, exasperated, “Sit. Down.”

The boy shrugged and pocketed the battered wallet before taking his seat beside Aoyama.

Paul made his way to the wooden desk at the front of the room. “Your time will begin…” he dinged one of those metal bells found in quiet offices that the employees usually ignore anyway. “Now.”

The sound of sheets of paper being turned over was the only thing Aoyama heard for around three seconds give or take. He scanned the questions on the paper quickly, checking which ones he'd need more time on. He gave up on that strategy a couple questions in and decide to wing it. It had only been a minute or so before a loud cough echoed through the room.

Aoyama didn't want to look, he really didn't, but unfortunately he ready knew who the culprit was. He looked to his left where the blond boy was currently having a coughing fit. It was obviously fake. Does anyone move around that much when they cough? So much that they have to grab onto other people's desks, making their sheet of paper fall off and onto the floor where it is so conveniently there for someone to look at? Aoyama wasn't buying it.

"Are you alright, Sir?" Paul asked with no concern on his voice.

"Yeah, just -" Cough. "Need to-" Cough. "Grab onto this desk." Cough. Aoyama's paper fell, all hope of a normal test experience falling into the abyss with it.

The boy hastily scribbled a copied answer onto his sheet before getting up from his position on the floor, and walking to the front. Supposedly to hand up his test.

"It's only been a few minutes, Sir, how could you have –“

"AH I'M DYING!" The boy crumpled to the floor, taking more test sheets down with him, again, messily writing down the answers. He pretended to spazz out like he was having a heart attack before stopping. Presumably 'dead'.

Paul released an irritated breath from his nostrils, “Sir, get up. Your behaviour is not up to the test conditions standard.”

The boy got up as if he didn’t just ‘die’ from a heart attack. “I have a broken arm,” Surely that would give him a pass to do whatever he wanted to ace the test.

Aoyama stared longingly at the fallen pieces of paper on the floor closest to him. He could see the answers. The person in front of him had more than half of the questions done, it wouldn’t take long to copy them down. Aoyama had always been fast at writing. No one would know, they’d be too distracted to notice. Aoyama didn’t realise he’d already copied the answers until he glimpsed the words on his paper. All eyes were on the commotion happening in the front of the room. The deed was done.

He got up and handed in his test as the test administrator man was busy with the boy, he could sneakily retreat from the crime scene and it would go unnoticed.

That is, if the annoying boy wasn't there.

“Ooooh! You finished? Wow, lemme see!” Aoyama’s test was snatched quicker than any weave in history. Right before his eyes. “Hey! You copied me!!!”

Aoyama didn’t have time for this shit. He had gorgeous croissants awaiting him at his apartment and they demanded to be eaten.

“I’m pretty sure you copied half the tests in this room, Monsieur.

"Alas, mon ami, that is where you are wrong." The boy said indignantly, "It has never been said that I copied them. Have you ever thought that it was they who copied me?" He didn't wait for an answer. "Non! Never. Jamais. So as you may see, I am not in the wrong." He held up his casted arm. "My arm's broken too, give me some lenience."

"Mon Deiu, Monsieur. Are you sure you're right in the head? I know a doctor who can dazzle you up. Some sparkle will do you good."

"Enough," Paul said, his patience wearing thin. "You will stop speaking and wait outside until the test duration has finished. Security will show you the way out."

He shooed Aoyama and the annoying boy out the room, into the hall. The lights were barely lit and in need of new light bulbs.

It was silent for a long time.

"I'm Neito Monoma, by the way." It was a poor attempt at filling the silence.

"Yuga Aoyama. Are you French?" Aoyama decided to humour this Monoma person.

"We are in France."

"Non, I mean your name is not French, so perhaps you are a foreigner?"

"I could say the same for you."


Whoever Monoma was, Aoyama knew two things about him. One, he definitely needed some sparkles in his life, so he could twinkle as brightly as Aoyama himself. (Well hopefully not as bright, then he’d outshine Aoyama and nobody wants that.) And two, his arm was not broken. That was all for show. Aoyama didn't know if that was incredibly smart or incredibly stupid.