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you’re not alone (make this place your home)

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“Movie night!” Hans bursts into Matteo’s room. “You’re missing movie - oh fuck! Sorry!”

 

His snicker betrays any semblance of apology.

 

“Can you please learn to knock?!” Matteo yells. David buries a laugh into Matteo’s neck, shaking underneath him.

 

“If I knocked, I wouldn’t get to see your pasty, naked back.”

 

“Fuck off,” Matteo yells again, throwing a pillow in Hans’s direction. He leaves, cackling. Two seconds later the door opens again and something is thrown onto the bed with a small “Gift! Be safe!” from the doorway. Even though he is 99% certain what it is, Matteo still groans when he picks it up.

 

David could no longer stifle a laugh. “Bold of him to assume we don’t have our own. But free lube is free lube. And rainbow condoms! Nice.”

 

“I hate you so much.”

 

“You don’t,” David grins and kisses his cheek. “You love me. You told me yourself.”

 

Matteo rolls his eyes fondly and climbs off David. He searches for a shirt, pulling it on with a sigh. “If I’m not getting laid because of Hans and his movie night, I’m at least wearing your sweater. Give it to me.”

 

David rolls his eyes in return, but stands up and complies. “I knew you were only with me for my clothes.”

 

“You got me. Though I guess you have a few other redeeming qualities.”

 

David winds his arms around Matteo’s neck and gives him a soft kiss. “Oh? Do go on.”

 

Matteo smiles just as softly. “I’ll tell you later.”

 

“Tell me my redeeming qualities,” David pouts.

 

Matteo repeats what he said.

 

“And why won’t you tell me now?”

 

“Because,” Matteo responds, returning the kiss. “I don’t think we have the time.”

 

David pulls him into a hug, hiding his blush in Matteo’s chest. “I love you.”

 

“I love you, too.” He groans. “Movie night awaits.”

 

“What do you think we’re watching?”

 

“Dunno, hopefully Twilight.”

 

David pulls back and hits him. “Fuck off and find me one of your sweatshirts.”

 

Matteo bows. “Of course, your majesty.”

 

-

 

“What took you guys so long?” Abdi yells. “We’ve been waiting ages.”

 

Matteo snags a bowl of popcorn from the coffee table and motions for David to sit in the last available seat, a chair Hans had dragged from his room earlier in the day. “Just because you only last thirty seconds, Abdi, doesn’t mean we all only last thirty seconds.”

 

Jonas nearly spits his beer across the room.

 

“Fuck you.”

 

“That’s David’s job,” Jonas shouts.

 

David shrugs as Matteo plants himself on his lap. “Neither of you are wrong.”

 

“Thanks, babe,” Matteo snickers as David wraps both arms around his waist and turns around to kiss him.

 

“Okay,” Hans claps. “The heterosexuals picked the movie, so it’ll be boring, but we may as well begin.”

 

In the end it isn’t Twilight, but some boring action film that Matteo could care less about. Eventually Matteo gives up on any semblance of paying attention and turns around to sit horizontally across David’s lap, burying both hands in his hair.

 

Matteo’s chair had been the last brought to the room, but even though no one was behind them, there were still very much surrounded by their friends. David doesn’t seem to care that they aren’t alone and begins to press soft kisses to Matteo’s neck. His soft gasp is covered by what appears to be some epic battle scene, but he can feel David’s smirk against his skin; he pulls back so Matteo can see the full extent of his smugness.

 

He rolls his eyes, but knows he can’t hide the flush on his cheeks, and pulls him into a proper kiss.

 

“Stop necking, it’s movie night,” Mia groans.

 

“Ah, yes,” Matteo nods. “Movie night. What are we watching?”

 

Carlos throws a cushion at them. “You have a bedroom, Matteo.”

 

Matteo stands, dragging David with him. “We have a gift from Hans to use as well. Ciao.”

 

-

 

They had joked about using Hans’s gift, but in the end just choose to kiss and lay together, knowing they have all the time in the world. David is stroking his chest, and it’s obvious he’s trying to get the courage to say something.

 

“What’s up?”

 

“You’re the first person I’ve felt comfortable not wearing a binder around.”

 

Matteo hums and runs a hand through his hair.

 

“I mean, I’m always wearing layers - God, does it get hot - but I can lay next to you, or lay on your chest, and be comfortable without it.”

 

“I’m glad,” Matteo smiles. “Sorry about the heat.”

 

David laughs softly. “It’s okay.”

 

“Do I make you sweat, Mr. Schreibner?”

 

“Oh, fuck off.” David rolls his eyes but Matteo can see the soft blush on his cheeks.

 

“This is my bed, you can’t tell me to fuck off.”

 

David rolls his eyes again, but rests his head on Matteo’s shoulder. He takes a brief pause, before inhaling.

 

“You’ve never asked.”

 

“Never asked what?”

 

“To see me completely naked.”

 

“Did you…want me to? Ask you? I know it’s safer if you aren’t wearing your binder and you tend to wear it too long, from what I’ve researched, and obviously overheating in a sweatshirt isn’t good either, but it’s your body.”

 

Matteo isn’t prepared for David to start crying, and rushes to apologize.

 

“No, don’t apologize.” David is struggling to speak through his tears. “I just love you, so much.”

 

Matteo smiles and strokes his cheek. “I love you, too.”

 

“It’s not just that, though. I trust you, more than I’ve ever trusted anyone in my life. We haven’t even been together a month -” He stops to shudder a breath. “You’ve done research -” He pauses to gather his thoughts.

 

“My research says you’re being an idiot, you know. And unsafe.”

 

David snorts, wiping at his eyes. “Yeah, my ribs and lungs agree with that. But I’ve never not worn it around other people. I used to only take it off when I'm alone. But I’m always with you.”

 

Matteo runs his fingers through David’s hair and smiles. “And whose fault is that?”

 

“Oh, yours, definitely.”

 

“I have many many texts that start with ‘Please come over’. I can definitely prove that it’s your fault.”

 

David laughs. “I have enough texts that start with ‘No one’s home’ to prove it’s yours.”

 

“Guess we’ll agree to disagree.”

 

“Guess we will.”

 

“You don’t have to come over every time I ask, you know.”


“And ignore your booty calls? Never! Besides,” he sighs softly. “I like spending time with you.”

 

“I like spending time with you, too. But it shouldn’t be at the risk of your health.”

 

David hums, and rests his head against Matteo’s chest. They lay there for a moment, just breathing.

 

“No one’s every really seen me without it,” David’s voice is rough when he breaks the silence. “I’m comfortable with you, as long as I’m wearing layers. But you’ve never seen me without it.”

 

“You don’t owe me this, or whatever. Just because we’re together doesn’t mean you don’t get privacy.”

 

“I trust you,” David repeats, tears welling in his eyes again. “Besides my sister, you’re the only person I know who’ll never see me differently.”

 

“There are so many people who have never and would never see you differently, and I hate that it’s hard for you to believe that.” Matteo strokes David’s jaw. “You mean the world to me, and you deserve so much.”

 

David rushes to kiss him. When he pulls back he’s gasping for breath, even though it was hardly a brush of lips.

 

“You don’t have to,” Matteo continues. “I’d never ask that of you.”

 

“I know,” David whispers, rolling out of bed. “And I’m grateful. Thank you.”

 

Matteo shakes his head as he sits up. “Don’t thank me for basic human decency.”

 

David nods and turns towards the door. Latent fear resurfaces, David running away, but he’s just making sure it’s locked. He turns around and fiddles nervously with the hem of his shirt before pulling it over his head.

 

Matteo sits up straight. “Wait, now?”

 

“I mean…if that’s okay with you?”

 

“David,” Matteo says. “How many times do I have to repeat myself. It’s your body, and as long as you’re comfortable, I’m okay with it.”

 

“Just needed to hear it one more time.” He tries to smirk but it’s a poor imitation of his usual; he’s very obviously nervous. “Besides. Want to see if sex is better when I can breathe and I’m not overheating.”

 

“Oh?” Matteo leans back on his elbows. “No one told me we’d be having sex.”

 

David searches for something to throw at him, but can only find his recently discarded shirt, which hardly makes an impact even as it hits Matteo in the face.

 

“Who said I’d be having sex with you?”

 

Matteo hums, turning the shirt over in his hands. “Well, I’ve been told you love me, and trust me, and that I mean the world to you -”

 

“Excuse me,” David interrupts. “You said the world thing.”

 

“Whatever, I mean the world to you anyway.”

 

David sighs loudly. “I guess.”

 

Matteo smiles widely in return. “Knew it.” He pauses, looking down at the shirt in his hand. “Uh…are you sure you - don’t want to - wear just a shirt? Would that make you more comfortable? Or do you want me to look away?” He’s rambling, he knows that, but he wants to do everything he can. “I won’t touch your chest, but I don’t know if there’s anything else I can do? To make you more comfortable?”

 

“All jokes aside,” David interrupts, tugging down his joggers; the look on his face is soft, and Matteo feels as though there’s a knife in his chest. “You do mean the world to me. And you said not to thank you, but thank you.”

 

Matteo stands and joins him by the door. “You’re welcome, then.”

 

“To answer your question,” he continues. “You can look at me. Pretty difficult to do anything with your eyes closed.”

 

Matteo rolls his eyes. “Fuck off, you know what I meant.”

 

He jokingly turns away, but David drags him into his arms. “No, you’re not allowed to leave.”

 

“Never?”

 

“Never.”

 

Matteo smiles and rests his forehead against the other boy’s. “I’m okay with that.”

 

They kiss gently for a moment until Matteo pulls away. “Anything else?”

 

“I’m not sure about touching. Like, this is new, and I can’t tell you really anything no for certain. Maybe not yet?”

 

Matteo nods. “We have time.”

 

“Yeah?”

 

“Of course. All the time in the world.”

 

“That’s good.”

 

Matteo hums. “What about a shirt?”

 

“Not - during. I don’t think? Like I said, I can’t say anything for certain. But I’d like to - I don’t know. Feel you. Skin to skin.”

 

Matteo grins. “I’d like that too. But only -”

 

“- if I’m comfortable with it. I know, baby. You’ve said it many times.”

 

Matteo pouts. “Don’t make fun of me.”

 

David smiles softly. “It means a lot, though. Even if you ramble on a bit, it still means a lot.”

 

Matteo gives him one last squeeze before pulling away completely, and returning to sit on the bed.

 

“Is there anything else you’d like me to do?”

 

“At least take your top off. I’m stood here mostly naked and you’re fully clothed.”

 

“Always trying to get me naked.”

 

He reaches to comply just as David reaches for the hem of his binder. When he finishes struggling out of his shirt, he looks up to David, waiting for a snarky comment about Matteo being such a disaster he can’t even remove his own shirt.

 

He’d never seen David completely naked before. He still looks nervous, shuffling his feet, arms crossed across his chest.

 

This was a big step, a huge step. Matteo feels tears well in his own eyes as he stands once more.

 

“Can I hug you? Or would that make you uncomfortable?”

 

“A hug would be nice.”

 

Matteo wraps his arms around David’s waist and buries his head in the crook of his neck.

 

After a moment, David pulls back. “Are you…are you crying?”

 

Matteo drags a hand down his face. “Crying? What? I’m not crying, you’re crying.”

 

“I think we’re both crying, baby.”

 

“You’re probably right.”

 

“Why are you crying?”

 

“I just - I don’t know. It seems stupid, I’m a teenager, I had time, but after my father left - I never. Thought I’d be with someone, and trust them so much, be trusted so much. You're - I don’t know.”

 

David hums and rests his forehead against Matteo’s.

 

“It’s beautiful with you.”

 

David pulls back so he can meet Matteo’s gaze.

 

“Beautiful?”

 

Matteo nods, suddenly nervous himself. “More than. I feel understood, and I’ve never felt that way before. I love you and I trust you.”

 

He’s barely finished speaking when he’s pulled into a kiss.

 

“I think…” David pulls back, gasping. “We have a gift to use.”

 

Apparently he is very pleased to discover that yes, sex is better when you can breathe and don’t overheat.

 

-

 

Matteo offers David his sweatshirt, but he shakes his head. “Not yet. Cuddling now.”

 

“If you’re sure.”

 

David smiles up at him. “I’m sure.”

 

Matteo returns the smile, running a hand through his hair. “Let me know.”

 

They’re quiet for a moment.

 

“You’re better than anything I could have dreamed, you know,” Matteo whispers. David turns to face him.

 

“Did you dream of this often?”

 

Matteo shakes his head. “I was scared to. I was too busy - acting. Playing a part.”

 

“Are you still acting?”

 

He laughs. “What would you say if I answered yes?”

 

“That I don’t think you’re that great of an actor, then,” David smiles. “I’ve directed you, I can tell it’s not your calling.”

 

“Maybe you’re just a shitty director.”

 

David hums. “Am I?”

 

“No,” Matteo sighs. “You’re good at everything and it pisses me off.”

 

“Oh? You did say you’d tell me all the things you love about me. Are you going to write sonnets about me now?” David smiles against his skin. “Shakespeare could never.”

 

Matteo groaned. “I hate Shakespeare. I fell asleep reading Hamlet when we had to read it for class.”

 

“Shakespeare’s overrated,” David agrees. “But don’t tell anyone that, it’ll ruin my image.”

 

“I’m glad you’ve finally accepted that your image is broody, pretentious artist.”

 

“Stop making fun of me and tell me all the things you love about me.”

 

“Hey, you make fun of me all the time and you’ve never written sonnets about me.”

 

David grins and shifts so he can face Matteo. “Well, I’m no poet but. I love your eyes - they’re so expressive. And when you smile so wide your eyes close, if that’s not the most beautiful thing I’ve seen.”

 

Matteo rolls his eyes but feels himself flushing. “Stop, I was joking.”

 

“I’m not.” David reaches up to kiss his cheek and runs a thumb down Matteo’s face. “Your freckles, your stupid disheveled hair that I wasn’t expecting to be as soft as it is. The way your hugs make me feel. Your hands, and how much you like holding mine.”

 

Matteo pushes David off of him so he can roll over and hide his blush in his pillow. David just lays down on top of his back, voice getting softer.

 

“The fact that you listen, and don’t talk over anyone. You always manage to make me smile, even if it’s you just being your idiot self.”

 

Matteo can feel David’s soft sigh against his neck.

 

“You put all of yourself into everything you do, including how much you love. You love, so much. I’m honored that I’m one of those people you love.”

 

Matteo turns his face so David can see his smile. “I love you more than anyone, you know. Even if you embarrass me.”

 

David ignores him in favor of kissing the side of his mouth. “You’re - I’ve been running, for so long. I’ve never felt like I had somewhere to come home to. Then I met you. You made me want to stop running. You’re home.”