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All the Ships - All the Memes | Discontinued & Up For Adoption

Chapter Text

[Class 1-A]

[3:34 pm] 

 

Yaoyorozu Momo created the group “Class 1-A”

Yaoyorozu Momo added Iida Tenya, Shouto, Froppy, Pretty in Pink, Fuck Gravity, and 10+ others to the chat

Yaoyorozu Momo set nicknames to custom

 

Yaoyorozu Momo: It was brought to my attention that it’d be a good idea to create a group chat with all of our Class.

Iida Tenya: That’s a good idea, Yaoyorozu-kun! I’m impressed.

Yaoyorozu Momo: You shouldn’t thank me. It was actually Kyouka that had the idea.

Iida Tenya: Then, thank you Jirou-kun!

mcr_is_my_spirit_animal: i wasnt even sure if that was a good idea at all

mcr_is_my_spirit_animal: i mean, we have a bakuhoe

Shouto: don’t you mean bakugou?

mcr_is_my_spirit_animal: did i fucking stutter

Shouto: k, have a nice day.

Iida Tenya: Jirou-kun! This behaviour is highly unbecoming for a student of UA!

Kami: oh sweet

Kami: @Sero Hanta, @Pretty in Pink; you know what to do

Pretty in Pink: heck yeah

mcr_is_my_spirit_animal: you cant deny the truth iida

Iida Tenya: All of us are aspiring to be Heroes and we should behave as such. It’s unacceptable to say things like that about a fellow Hero-in-training, Jirou-kun.

Iida Tenya: Also, Kaminari-kun, Ashido-kun and Sero-kun - I don’t know what exactly you’re up to, but please keep whatever it is at bay.

Sero Hanta: u can’t stop the memez

Pretty in Pink: my fellows, let’s commence

Shouto: didn’t knew you of all people knew a word like commence ashido.. 

Pretty in Pink: RUDE

 

Pretty in Pink set their name to Alien Qween

Sero Hanta set Kami's name to Pikabae

 

Pikabae: Aww

Red Riot: So manly! 

 

Pikabae set Red Riot's name to Sharky

 

Sharky: thanks, dude!! 

Pikabae: :] 

 

Alien Qween set Bakugou's name to King Baku

Pikabae set Sero Hanta's name to Spidey

 

Sharky: Mind if i join u? 

Alien Qween: bro

Spidey: Y you

Pikabae: even ask

mcr_is_my_spirit_animal: im scared

Sharky: don't be! I'll give you a manly name

 

Sharky set mcr_is_my_spirit_animal's name to Deep Dope

 

Deep Dope: thats ok

Deep Dope: thx kiri

Sharky: no prob

 

Alien Qween set Midoriya's name to Izu-cute

Pikabae set Shouto's name to IcyHot

Sharky set Yaoyorozu Momo's name to God

Spidey set I cannot stop twinkling's name to Baguette

 

Baguette: RUDE

 

Pikabae set Iida Tenya's name to Sanic

Pikabae set MINETA's name to Grapist

Alien Qween set Koda Kouji's name to  o(*>ω<*)o

Spidey set Satou Rikidou's name to Diabetis

Sharky set Banquet of Darkness's name to birb

Alien Qween set Ojirou's name to Tails

Pikabae set WatchingUSleep's name to Invisihoe

Spidey set Shoji's name to Arms

 

Pikabae: done. f gravity + froppy r purfect 

King Baku: tf is this

Alien Qween: scroll up

birb: I don't know if i should laugh or cry

birb: probs cry

Deep Dope: probs cry

Spidey: who tf is jesus

Fuck Gravity: Deku-kun

Sharky: guys what the actual fuck

Sharky: guys how in the name of god did we get here

Fuck Gravity: hush! We can't taint the precious cinnamon rolls

Sharky: g u y s 

Sharky: w t f 

King Baku: wtf round face

Fuck Gravity: so yaomomo is god, yes? so he asked who her son was. Jesus. Deku. 

Alien Qween: why did you answer that fast?? 

Fuck Gravity: why didn't you

Alien Qween: Well… 

 

[Midoriya ; Yaoyorozu Momo]

[3:56 pm] 

 

Midoriya: Hey Yaomomo! 

Yaoyorozu Momo: Hello Midoriya-kun. Can I help you with something? 

Midoriya: Yes, just wanted to ask you what you think about your nickname in our group chat

Yaoyorozu Momo: It feels a tad awkward. 

Midoriya: so you don't mind me changing it? 

Yaoyorozu Momo: No, not at all. 

 

[Class 1-A] 

[4:01 pm] 

 

Izu-cute: First of all: I am concerned about you lot

Izu-cute: Also, t-thank you Ashido-san

Izu-cute: alas, there is something to adjust

 

Izu-cute set God's name to Mom

Mom set Izu-cute's name to soft green

 

soft green: t-thank you, Yaoyorozu-san!!! 

Mom: Thank you, Midoriya-kun. I am flattered. 

Deep Dope: yea she blushed

Alien Qween: how you know

Mom: Kyouka is at my house. We're studying for the next Pop Quiz. 

Pikabae: the next?? ugh i failed the last

Pikabae: don't wanna even think abt a next

Alien Qween: so

Alien Qween: youre 'studying'

Deep Dope: yes

Alien Qween: just studying

Alien Qween: together

Alien Qween: alone

Alien Qween: in yaomomos room

Mom: Yes, we are indeed studying. But contrary to your beliefs, we're seated in the Dining Hall with my sister accompanying us. 

King Baku: Raccoon eyes get ur fucking shit together

Alien Qween: oh shit the king of the bakusquad has spoken

King Baku: damn right 

 

[#bakusquad]

[4:12 pm] 

 

Kami created the group "#bakusquad"

Kami added Bakugou, Sero Hanta, Red Riot, Pretty in Pink and 1 other

 

Bakugou: why tf is earjacks here

Red Riot: c'mon shes 1 of us

mcr_is_my_spirit_animal: is she? 

Pretty in Pink: Yea!! 

Bakugou: fine but ponytail is in dekus shitty group so she better stay there

Bakugou: and call me a hoe again, stupid earjacks and ill skin you alive

mcr_is_my_spirit_animal: duly noted

Chapter Text

[Class 1-A]

[4:13 pm] 

 

Grapist: oh sweet😌

Grapist:wait whats with my name😯

Grapist: ANyways girls👅👅

Grapist: here you go👉👉👌👌

Grapist : photo2.jpg

Deep Dope: someone delete

Deep Dope: pls

soft green: working on it

Invisihoe: gross!!!!! 

 

soft green deleted 1 message

 

Froppy: thank goodness

Fuck Gravity: Deku, you're my Hero!! <3

soft green: thank you Uraraka-chan

Mom: I will report this to Aizawa-sensei. 

Grapist: why?! 

Mom: This should be self-explanatory, Mineta-san. 

Grapist: it isnt!!? you ladys thrive for such piccccs👉👌

Deep Dope: we most certainly dont

Froppy: i am a lesbian so… no. 

Alien Qween: no.

Grapist: you all gay or what???? 😕

Grapist: do3snt matter for me🤤

Grapist: but lemme watch 💦💦💦👅

Froppy: hell no, ribbit

Grapist: especially you, asui 💦💦👅

Invisihoe: yaomomo-chan, please include this

Mom: I'll just add Aizawa-sensei. It would be more convenient that way. 

Mom: Wait for a few minutes, please. 

 

[Yaoyorozu Momo ; AS]

[4:17 pm] 

 

Yaoyorozu Momo: Good afternoon, Aizawa-sensei. I hope I am not interrupting anything right now? 

AS: what happened? 

Yaoyorozu Momo: We, or rather Kyouka, had the idea to create a group chat with everyone from our class. 

Yaoyorozu Momo: Once Mineta-san became aware of it, he sent a gruesome picture into the chat and - god bless him - Midoriya-kun deleted it soon after. 

Yaoyorozu Momo: But he didn't understand that we girls don't want to see… said pictures. Tsuyu-chan outed herself as a Lesbian and promptly Mineta-san made inappropriate comments. 

AS: homophobic slurs? 

Yaoyorozu Momo: If you count asking if he could watch? 

Yaoyorozu Momo: I planned on making screenshots, but as evidence first-hand material would be better, I guess. 

Yaoyorozu Momo: So I wanted to ask if I could add you? 

AS: go ahead

Yaoyorozu Momo: Thank you, sensei. 

 

[Class 1-A]

[4:26 pm] 

 

Mom added AS to the chat

 

Grapist: so you'll lemme watch? 

Froppy: no! How often do I have to repeat myself??? 

Grapist: fine, but we'll see if you find yoir panties ever again 💦

Froppy: hell, @Sanic @Mom @soft green h e l p

soft green: Iida's phone broke

soft green: Anyways, Mineta such behavior is so unmoralic

soft green: while your quirk could make you a commendable Hero in no time, i doubt that you will ever rise in the popularity rankings

soft green: you can't just harass people, say homophobic slurs to everyone and expect to come clean

soft green: you even stole someone's underwear for crying out loud!! 

soft green: i will talk to the principal directly, see if we can send you into a rehab or anything, but you will not continue this on my watch

Baguette: *le gasp*~

AS: i second all of the above. 

soft green: holy, Aizawa-sensei!! 

AS: i hereby expel you, Mineta Minoru, from ua

Grapist: You cant doo that!!!?!!!! 

AS: this is ua

 

AS added Yours Truly to the chat

 

AS: just read the above

Yours Truly: Congrats Asui-chan that you feel safe enough in our facility to come out. 

Froppy: thx, i guess?

Yours Truly: Other than that I authenticate all that was said by Eraserhead and Midoriya-chan. Mineta Minoru is no longer a member of this Class. 

Yours Truly: Oh and I am Principal Nezu if you don't believe my validity. 

Grapist: if i have to go ill spill

King Baku: spill what?

Grapist: midoriya and bakugo are trannys

Grapist: aoyama is everything but certainly not a boy

Grapist: jirou is fucking both ways

Grapist: girl-kaminari.jpg

 

 

King Baku removed Grapist from the chat

 

King Baku: i guess itd be better if the teachers levae now

 

AS left the chat


Yours Truly left the chat

Chapter Text

[Class 1-A]

[4:49 pm]

 

Invisihoe: if anyone of you wants to talk, i'll be there for you

Sharky: Oh shit guys

 

 

Kaminari slowly set their phone down. Their face was blank, hands curled into fists, nails leaving crescent marks on their skin. 

The screen of their phone lit up repeatedly, someone tried to call them twice, thrice… but their vision was too blurry to see the dialler. 

Then, the doorbell rung. They heard it, hands twitched and their head jerked into the general direction of the door. They knew that their parents weren't home yet. So they could just pretend not to be home and the person would go away, eventually, leaving them to their solemn apathy. 

Again, the doorbell. Accompanied by a shout… Todoroki? 

Kaminari bit their lip, lowering their head. Of course it was him. Him, who had stayed behind with Kaminari one day a week to help in Maths and Japanese Literature. And in turn they had helped with Physics, Biology and Chemistry. Naturally, he wouldn't want to associate anymore with them, now that he knew. Now that he knew how much they weren't normal. 

"It's like ripping off a band-aid", they murmured into the quiet. "It hurts, but it gets better." They felt like they were lying to themself. "... someday " Now, they didn't. 

Todoroki Shouto, son of the number two Hero Endeavor. Between all the formulas, equations and books, he came to think of him as something akin to a brother. But who were them in comparison? 

They were the dumbest kid in the class, failing assignments again and again and again as if it were a competition. Truth to be told… they tried. Learned everything they could, even if the words were never really allowing themselves to be read. 

They were everything somebody like Todoroki Shouto wouldn't like to be friends with. 

But they… They tried to regain a hold over their emotions. And they stood, marching through the small hallway that seemed longer than any day before. They reached the front door, placing a shaking hand onto the handle, slowly lowering it. 

It's like ripping off a band-aid. 

They tried not to cry. They smiled despite the thunderous fear and anguish inside them. 

Because there he was, Todoroki Shouto in all his heterochromatic glory. He smiled at Kaminari with worry etched into his features, blue and grey orbs searching for something in their eyes. 

"Hey Kami." His voice was soft, his eyes were soft and he looked concerned. For someone like them? 

Wait, shouldn't they- shouldn't they respond to him by now? Or better yet, two minutes ago? Because until now they just stared at him. 

Kaminari nodded lamely at him, opening the door a bit wider and apparently… Inviting him into their house ? 

Dear god Denki, that's not a band-aid! That's a wrecking ball of hurt that you're inviting into your home…! 

But for all that's worth, he got so spend time with Todoroki for a few more minutes. Todoroki with his perfect grades and gender and sexuality . 

Todoroki took him up on his offer and entered, quickly slipping out of his shoes and promptly into guest slippers while they closed the door, heart pounding in their chest. Kaminari mutely motioned for Todoroki to follow with a uncertain handwave and lead them into the living room. 

Once seated, Todoroki sat down next to them on the couch, the dual-haired boy started. 

"So… I just wanted to come by to assure that you are okay. That you know that everyone in our Class is happy to know that you're there... And that you can come to us at any time. Even if it is just to help you punch that purple twatwaffle into the ground. Whatever floats your boat, really." Todoroki smiled. But despite this, Kaminari mentally prepared themself for the inevitable. They tried, that is. 

 They felt more like crying. Todoroki had to be lying. He had… he surely had to so his as some part in a bet he lost. Where the other one wanted to see them suffer a thousand times. Because who would want to befriend someone as stupid as him? 

"I-" Kaminari couldn't help the tears building up in their eyes. "This is just some stupid bet you've lost, r-right?" Damn, their voice was shaky. Shit. What were they going to do now? How do situations like this work? 

"No! Kami, I wouldn't ever joke about something like this. I like you and enjoy being friends with you."

And even if they were sure that Todoroki would push them away this instant, because it all had been nothing more than a ruse, they did it nonetheless. 

They leaned over to him, embracing the heterochromatic teen. And Kaminari practically melted into it, trying to show - not tell - everything they weren't ready to say. 

And as Todoroki didn't push them away, a tear escaped their eyes that were tightly shut. A tear soon turned into many and they didn't know how they ended up there, but soon they cried against Todorokis chest, while the boy rubbed in soothing circles over his back. 

And if situations like this didn't usually end up like this, they didn't care. All they did care for was how safe they felt on Todorokis chest.

Chapter Text

[Class 1-A]

[7:43 pm]

 

Pikabae: okay so. 

Pikabae: I am Genderfluid, meaning that my identification of my own gender changes sometimes. Sometimes as in the midst of a day, or as in when I wake up in the morning. 

Pikabae: I am sorry if that makes anyone uncomfortable to be around me, so it's perfectly fine if you don't want to anymore. 

Pikabae: I just,,, wanted to tell you guys

Sharky: so manly!! 

King Baku: so what? You're still the dipshit we all know and love. whatever your gender, i don't care. and if anyone ever talks shit abt you come to me and i blow them the fuck up

King Baku: also, yea, i'm fucking trans. 

soft green: yes. actually, i am too. 

soft green: besides that we all still love you as you are the goodest pikachu in the world

 

soft green set Pikabae 's name to goodest pika

 

Baguette: aside from the obvious things like, yes i am trans, we all stan a Genderfluid Kami! You're totally valid~

Deep Dope: ily Kami. Like baku said, all that matters is you and how you feel comfortable. anything else is not valid. ever need help? ring me up.

Deep Dope: also… I am bi and in a happy relationship w/ @Mom

Mom: Yes!! <3 

Mom: Kaminari, please remember that all of us love you as you are. As I struggled with my own sexuality as well (being Pan and whatnot), I hope you can accept yourself the way you are. 

Mom: On a side note, I will give you a little something tomorrow at the Mall, if that's okay? 

IcyHot: Congrats Jirou and Yaomomo. 

IcyHot: Seconded by Kami. 

IcyHot: They also thank all of you for your support and love and, tbh, they're crying rn because they're too fucking happy and relived and everything

Alien Qween: love you kami just the way y'are

Froppy: ^

Fuck Gravity: ^^

Arms: ^

Spidey: ^^^

birb: ^

Tails: ^

Invisihoe: ^

Diabetis: ^

o(*>ω<*)o: ^

IcyHot: thank you now theyre crying even more

o(*>ω<*)o: (☍﹏⁰))

IcyHot: dw they r just overwhelmed by all the f e e l s 

soft green: nbdy comment on ashiods,,,

soft green: ,,,y'are

Tails: no

soft green: ok bye

birb: we btr add aizawa-sensei back it be better we had supervsn or smth

Alien Qween: omfg you r like iida or like a dad

Alien Qween: WAIT

 

Alien Qween set Sanic 's name to Dad

 

Arms: weve got a mom nd a Dad

IcyHot: and a Dadzawa

Alien Qween: i am w h e e z i n g

Fuck Gravity: omg todo

Deep Dope: todo you sassy lil’ shit

Diabetis: lol

Sharky: brooooo

 

Mom added AS to the chat

goodest pika set AS 's name to Dadzawa

 

Dadzawa: i don't want to know

IcyHot: apparently i am sassy

goodest pika: yeah y'are

soft green: aside from a fucking ilc-theorist

Fuck Gravity: NOOOO MY PRECIOUS BABY CUSSED

Fuck Gravity: WHERE IS THAT FUCKING BAKAHOE 

Fuck Gravity: I AM GOING TO DESTROY HIM

Spidey: whoa

birb: who would've known that the first to write in capslog would be uraraka? 

Sharky: also

Sharky: B A K A H O E

King Baku: wanna fight, round face?! 

Mom: Nobody will fight. I am shocked that Midoriya-san knows how to curse, but that doesn't change the fact that it's prohibited to hurt another student. 

Dadzawa: what yaoyorozu said

soft green: besides

soft green: All Might is the King if american cussing

soft green: where do you think Baku saw that mich cussing

soft green: besides his mom

Froppy: that's all good, but could we backtrack to midoriya saying smth about todoroki bein a ilc-theorist? 

soft green: Illegitimate Love Children-Theorist. 

Deep Dope: not sure if we should ask

goodest pika: probs not

King Baku: that shit from the sports festival? hilarious. The most fucking hilarious thing ive ever heard

IcyHot: you heard that? what else you know? and why were you listening in? 

King Baku: everything. and i didn't listen in, fuckhead. dont hold such conversations in fucking open spaces. how fucking retarded 

soft green: this ilc-theory was stupid. but what you think about… yk

King Baku: stupid idiot. sorry for that fucker todoroki

IcyHot: that theory was glorious

IcyHot: dw baku. 

King Baku: i didnt worry you ant

 

[Bakugou ; Shouto] 

[8:04 pm] 

 

Shouto: You are trans. 

Bakugou: problem?  

Shouto: no. but how did you tell your parents that you are not, well, normal. 

Bakugou: it is normal todoroki 

Shouto: is it

Bakugou: yea

Shouto: My eldest brother, Todoroki Touya… 

Shouto: he confessed being gay to my father

Shouto: and my father burned him, scarring him badly

Shouto: he threw him out and i guess its not normal then

Bakugou: your dad is fucking ridiculous

Bakugou: did you talk to anybody abt that 

Shouto: no

Bakugou: holy shit todoroki

Shouto: please just call me shouto

Shouto: anything but Todoroki  

Bakugou: aight, fine

Bakugou: BUT 

Bakugou: your father is a flaming trashcan and he has no idea what the fucks normal and what isnt

Bakugou: being gay or anything that isn't hetero/cis is perfectly normal

Shouto: i guess… 

Bakugou: take your fucking time and come to terms with everything you are

Bakugou: ik what your father did and now i know what he did to your big bro

Bakugou: all i can say is that he is a stupid dickwad and that youre legit as yare

Shouto: thank you baku

Bakugou: np shouto

 

[Class 1-A]

[8:33 pm]

 

IcyHot set King Baku 's name to Bless King Baku

 

Spidey: i suddenly feel like something went ovr our heads

Sharky: same bro

goodest pika: broooo

Alien Qween: broooooo

Deep Dope: broooooooooooo

Tails: now i feel like something went ovr our heads

Invisihoe: ig it happens

Bless King Baku: yea

 

Bless King Baku set IcyHot 's name to Shoutowo

 

Alien Qween: ~gay is in the airrrr

Shoutowo: nah

goodest pika: gays he str8

Shoutowo: gays he gay

goodest pika: wait rly? 

Shoutowo: ig

Froppy: Gays I am going to bed. 

Fuck Gravity: sleep tight, tsuyu-chan! 

Alien Qween: aSide from that… I propose that emojis r cursed. 

o(*>ω<*)o: =͟͟͞͞(꒪⌓꒪*)

Alien Qween: kaomojis re okay but m****a used them and it doesn't feel right

soft green: agreed

Dadzawa: by the way

Dadzawa: soon another student will join our class. he'll be m*****'s replacement

Sharky: alright!! 

Shoutowo: Who will join us? 

 

Dadzawa added eddrw to the chat

 

birb: i have a suspicion 

Dadzawa: @eddrw this is your class chat

soft green: i probably know who it is!! 

soft green: i also recognize the name and i am

soft green: s h o o k 

Tails: who you think it is? 

soft green: i don't wanna spoil it. 

Chapter Text

[Hell]

[8:58 pm]

 

Midoriya created the group ' Hell ' 

Midoriya added eddrw , mcr_is_my_spirit_animal , Banquet of Darkness and Kami to the chat

Midoriya set nicknames to custom

 

Midoriya: Is your name based on the sacred texts? 

Midoriya: i need to know

Midoriya: for science 

eddrw: depends on ur definition of sacred

Banquet of Darkness: so he is one of us

mcr_is_my_spirit_animal: what is this

mcr_is_my_spirit_animal: y r there so many weird groups

Kami: our squad isn't weird jirou

Kami: y'are just mean

mcr_is_my_spirit_animal: mayhaps

Banquet of Darkness: that's besides the point

Midoriya: i assume that all of us are insomniacs

eddrw: i am diagnosed with insomnia

Kami: i am not

mcr_is_my_spirit_animal: same as kami

 

Midoriya set the group name to ' Insomnia Squad ' 

 

Midoriya: so nobody but shinsou-kun is actually diagnosed w/ it but i guess we just roll with the name

Kami: so it rly is him

Kami: cool! 

 

mcr_is_my_spirit_animal set their name to Insomni-jack

Kami set their name to Insomni-chu

Banquet of Darkness set their name to Insomni-dow

 

Insomni-jack: kami explain

insomni-chu: insomniac + pikachu

Midoriya: sounds more like pichu tbh

Insomni-chu: shit u rite

eddrw: shit u re all so creative

 

Insomni-dow set eddrw 's name to Lord Insomniac

 

Lord Insomniac: somehow i feel honored

Midoriya: now I am the only one left

Lord Insomniac: not for long

 

Lord Insomniac set Midoriya 's name to broken Insomniac

 

Insomni-dow: and you say y'aren't creative

Lord Insomniac: it was either that or prince insomniac

Insomni-jack: i stan our lord shinsou and saviour mido

Insomni-chu: broo 

 

Insomni-jack set broken Insomniac 's name to Saviour of Insomniacs

 

Saviour of Insomniacs: whyy? 

Insomni-chu: you cretead the group

Saviour of Insomniacs: oookay...

Lord Insomniac:  i finally realized what tokoyamis naem means

Lord Insomniac: Insomniac + shadow

Insomni-dow: hum

Insomni-jack: wait there is a way to write in italics

Lord Insomniac: yea. _ before and after it

Insomni-jack: omg

Saviour of Insomniacs: wait

Saviour of Insomniacs: this is glorious

Insomni-chu: this is hella awesome

Lord Insomniac: yea

Lord Insomniac: i was mentioned in the class chat, gotta blast

 

[Class 1-A]

[9:11 pm] 

 

Arms: so who is @eddrw

Mom: I have an idea. 

eddrw: but ive got the answer

soft green: may i introduce to you: 

Deep Dope: the one and only:

birb: good purple boi:

goodest pika: shinsou hitoshi

Mom: How funny - I was right. 

eddrw: i am confusion,,,? 

Mom: Oh, that. I am Yaoyorozu Momo, Vice Rep of our Class. 

Mom: @Dad’s phone is currently out of commission, but he is our Class Rep, Iida Tenya. 

Mom: We also have Aizawa-sensei in this group as added supervision. He added you, but I think he is busy now so I can't really mention him. He is set with @/Dadzawa.

eddrw: k

Deep Dope: m jirou

Shoutowo: todoroki

eddrw: oh, hi. is it okay if i call you shouto?... i dont like your father and the name… 

Shoutowo: It's fine. 

eddrw: thank you

Shoutowo: no problem ebony. 

goodest pika: i am s h o o k

goodest pika: but otherwise known as kaminari denki, prounouns they/them today

eddrw: cool. 

goodest pika: you are…. ok with that? 

Bless King Baku: he better is

eddrw: as your nonbinary pal idc what you are as long as you are happy 

eddrw: oh yea.. pronouns they/them

goodest pika: thank you

Fuck Gravity: i am uraraka ochako (the floaty one who fought against baku) and @/Froppy is asui tsuyu

eddrw: the frog girl, right? 

Fuck Gravity: yea

eddrw: bless king baku is bakugou and arms is shouji… mezou,right?

Arms: yes

Tails: i am ojirou. 

eddrw: oh… sorry… 

Tails: yeah, it's okay

eddrw: really?! 

Tails: yes. congrats that you finally achieved your goal

eddrw: ty

Alien Qween: peace, i am ashido mina

Alien Qween: @Sharky is kirishima eijioru, @/Spidey is sero hanta, @Baguette is aoyama yuuga

Sharky: why mention everyone but sero? 

Alien Qween: he went to sleep

Sharky: aye ok

Diabetis: i am satou rikidou, @o(*>ω<*)o is koda kouji

o(*>ω<*)o: o(^∀^*)o

eddrw: hy

Fuck Gravity: before the bakusquad catches you, i want to claim you for the dekusquad

soft green: dekusquad?? 

Fuck Gravity: yes. 

eddrw: mh 'kay

 

Dadzawa added Yours Truly to the chat

 

eddrw: that was hella sudden

Invisihoe: yea. btw shinsou, i am hagakure tooru

eddrw: nice to meetcha

 

Deep Dope set their name to Dementia

 

Shoutowo: I would go for Dark’ness but i like my name better

Dementia: no hard feelings bro

Yours Truly: Good evening students! In case you are wondering who I am, I am your Principal Nezu!! 

Dadzawa: i am too tired for you and nbdy else is insane enough to supervise you

Yours Truly: Or rather, nobody wanted to volunteer. 

Baguette: Understandable

Dementia: i mean,,, we have a

Bless King Baku: dont you dare earjacks

Dementia: b a k a h o e

Sharky: sigh. tmrw you're dead jirou. just saying. 

Dementia: worth it

Dementia: 10/10 would recommend again

Yours Truly: Bakugou-chan, you shouldn't kill Jirou-chan. 

Bless King Baku: see if i care

soft green: sigh,,, 

Bless King Baku: what's that supposed to mean, huh, deku? 

Mom: Iida-san called me a few minutes earlier and asked me to tell you that eight hours of sleep are what is considered healthy and therefore you should soon head to bed.

soft green: nothing, kacchan

eddrw: sleep is for the weak

birb: exactly. 

Bless King Baku: u should fucking try at least

eddrw: it's not that easy

Mom: Even if not, I agree with Bakugou-san. 

eddrw: fine, i try

Mom: Thank you! :) 

eddrw: dad i need my pills, can you bring them? 

eddrw: oh sry, wrong chat

Shoutowo: anyone else notice that aizawa went online right away?? 

soft green: shouto no! 

Shoutowo: Shouto YES! 

Dementia: Shouto YeEt! 

soft green: i swear to god jesus fukcing christ

 

eddrw deleted 1 message

 

Shoutowo: suspicious…

soft green: istg todo i wont bring moms soba leftovers for you but for kacchan

Shoutowo: you wouldn’t dare!! 

soft green: try me

Bless King Baku: what did she cook today? 

soft green: spicy soba 

Bless King Baku: i come over tmrw morning 

soft green: k, i tell mom

Bless King Baku: good. gngt

soft green: 2

Sharky: what just happened? 

Invisihoe: i dont know and dont care beccause i am tired af

Dementia: night gays

Chapter Text

[Class 1-A]

[6:09 am] 

 

soft green: Good morning!! 

Froppy: morning. and hello shinsou

eddrw: hy

Arms: hey there

Spidey: you mean,,, Hello there

Sharky: General Kenobi

Alien Qween: bruh

Dad: Good morning everyone. I am glad to inform you that I acquired a new phone! Welcome Shinsou-kun in our Class and congrats everyone who came out of the closet yesterday. 

Dad: Please remember our trip to the Mall today. 

Dad: Shinsou-kun you are invited to join us as well. 

eddrw: cool but sm1 has to send me the location

eddrw: but - why r we going as a class? 

Tails: Soon we're going to have a Training Camp and each of us needs to buy something today

eddrw: ah so that's what the list was for

eddrw: i already have everything, but i accompany you

Shoutowo: best of luck today. 

eddrw: you aren't cming? 

Shoutowo: No, I've got something important to do. 

soft green: @Bless King Baku mom has made your special curry

Bless King Baku: Hell yeah! Aunty Inko is the best! 

Sharky: Aunty Inko? 

soft green: my mother midoriya inko. 

Sharky: i got that,,, but,,, why,,, 

soft green: aunt mitsuki and my mom are friends 

Bless King Baku: yeah the hag and aunty inko are friends since university or something 

soft green: so naturally we know each other practically for our whole lives

Bless King Baku: we did most things together

Fuck Gravity: but then, how are you enemies today? or rivals or whatever? 

soft green: Kacchan got his Quirk

Sharky: and,,,?

soft green: well. i was a late bloomer quirkwise

eddrw: so you got tht quirk of yuors two yrs later or somethign? 

Bless King Baku: nope. just about the end of middle school 

soft green: it was about one or two days before the entrance exam

Sharky: Holy fuck dude

Fuck Gravity: so you rescuing me was you activating your quirk for one of the first times? 

soft green: the first actually

Tails: holy

Dad: Considering this I am very sorry that I was so rude to you on that day. You must've been extremely nervous! 

soft green: it's alright 

soft green: i learned to control my quirk to an extent and i am happy enough

soft green: no reason for me to slack off though

Sharky: i get all that and its super manly that you rescued Uraraka despite your inexperience, but why did your relationship with bakubro end up in shambles

Bless King Baku: things weren't that easy

soft green: yeah, but i guess it's sort of ok right now

Sharky: i really wanna know why

soft green: it just happened 

 

[Midoriya ; Bakugou]

[6:27 am] 

 

Bakugou: thank you i guess

Midoriya: i dont really know why i didn't tell them, but it just didn't feel right

Bakugou: mh

Midoriya: do you want to go w/ me to the mall later? 

Bakugou: mhkay

Midoriya : Uraraka is with us

Bakugou: sure

 

[Class 1-A]

[5:22 pm] 

 

Shoutowo: are you ok, midoriya? 

Shoutowo: i saw it in the news… 

soft green: yeah, but it was pretty scary

eddrw: istg i am not leaving your side anymore bro

eddrw: i leave for one (1) second

eddrw: and some handsy fuck threatens you

Fuck Gravity: i am sorry too

soft green: it's fine you two

soft green: i just worried my mom that's all

Shoutowo: don't forget our collective surrogate dad 

Shoutowo: and your family

soft green: family? 

Alien Qween: us!!! 

Froppy: what mina-chan said

Dadzawa: problem child, stop giving your mother heart attacks

soft green: i try my best

Arms: wtf

Bless King Baku: wtf deku

soft green: NOT TO

soft green: i try my best NOT TO give her heart attacks

goodest pika: pro bl e m c h i l d

Spidey: thiz iz gold

 

Shoutowo set soft green 's name to problem child

 

problem child: shoutooooo noooo

goodest pika: shouto yessss

Dementia: shoutooo

birb: y e e e e e e e t

Bless King Baku: wtf is wrong with you guys

Dementia: the better question is; what isnt?



[Insomnia Squad] 

[5:36 pm]

 

Lord Insomniac: deku ur bf is valid

Lord Insomniac: i approve

Insomni-jack: boyfriend… ? mido u got smth to spill? Bc i smell tea

Insomni-chu: s p i l l 

Saviour of Insomniacs: suddenly i can't read

Saviour of Insomniacs: memes aside, we aren't anything

Insomni-dow: ...yet

Saviour of Insomniacs: Fumikage no! bad dird!

Insomni-jack: dird.

Insomni-chu: dird?

Insomni-jack: dird!!

Insomni-dow: ,,,dird

Saviour of Insomniacs: guyys, please just stop

Lord Insomniac: did any1 else notice how fast he went into defensive

Lord Insomniac: besides the fact that his mom knows his bf and makes him food

Saviour of Insomniacs: please stop

Insomni-chu: omg u rite

Insomni-dow: hum

Insomni-jack: he went offline

Lord Insomniac: deku? 

Insomni-jack: mhmm

Lord Insomniac: which backs up my theory 

Insomni-chu : youre turning into a scnd todoroki with yor theries

Lord Insomniac: mayhaps

Chapter Text

[UA]

[5:41 pm]

 

KN: iS midoriya okay?

N: He says himself that everything’s fine.

YH: Your class is sure something particular eraser

AS: what bugs me is how shigaraki knew that they would be there today

YT: I already asked Tsukauchi Naomasa-kun to investigate!1

N: I will look into it, too.

KN: so asIde from midoriya nobodY had spoken to him, strange

AS: they give me a headache

YH: but you like them nonetheless

YT: How is young Hitoshi faring? I heard he tried to prosecute Shigaraki!!1

AS: he disappeared into the crowd and hito didn’t want to attract attention and endanger civilians

AS: holds himself responsible because he left for the restrooms

IK: He knows that he couldn’t have had known?

YH: yes!!

AS: he is cuddling with his kitten and writes with classmates

AS: hes still feeling guilty, i can see it in his eyes

YH: i believe satan will help him

KN: if someone would hack this chat they would be confused lmao

YT: He chose to name his kitten Satan?11!

AS: better than simba

AS: i wouldve went with lucifer but its not my cat so it his decision

AS: Ill take a nap

 

 

Aizawa Shouta winced as he repeatedly misgendered his own child. He hated that he had to do that, but Hitoshi had asked him to keep it a secret. It was already amazing that they had opened up to him enough to come out to him and his husband, but it wasn’t general knowledge yet. 

Shouta sighed and eyed Hitoshi's form sprawled out on the floor, Satan on their belly playing with a cat toy. In their hands was their phone, purple eyes fixated on whatever someone wrote. 

He raised from his armchair, ready to lay down next to Hitoshi and talk things through, as the doorbell rang. He raised his eyebrows in confusion as he wasn't expecting someone. Hizashi left twenty minutes ago for his radio show and Hitoshi knew better than to give someone their address. It could be Nemuri, she never told in advance when she planned to visit, but it was unlikely. 

He started to suspect something as soon as Hitoshi gently placed Satan on the ground next to themself and stood with a sheepish smile gracing their lips. 

"What did you do?" He asked exasperatedly as he slumped back into the armchair. 

Hitoshi swirled one of their purple locks around their finger, avoiding eye contact. "I, uhm, may have… invited Uraraka-chan, uh… over..?" Shouta groaned and signaled them to go open the door. He could hear Hitoshi greeting their classmate, allowing her to step inside. They fell into a semi-awkward conversation, easing by the minute. Until it came to a sudden halt as they reached the door to the living room. 

"A-Ah Aizawa-sensei! It's nice to see you...?" It sounded more like a question than anything, but he let it slide.

"You'll tell nobody where we live. You'll tell nobody that we live together. You'll tell nobody that I am married." He activated his Quirk to emphasize his words. "Are we clear?" The poor girl squeaked, and nodded frantically. 

"Yes, yes! I'll tell nobody, not a single soul, I promise." She sounded earnest, so he blinked, his hair flopping down, Quirk deactivating. 

"And you, Hitoshi, should know better." That was all he said, no need to place another burden on his child's shoulders. 

"I'm sorry, dad..", they murmured and led Uraraka to their room, catnapping Satan, Mochi and President Cat along the way, leaving Kuro to Shouta. He rolled his eyes, watching their retreating backs and seeing Uraraka fidget while holding Mochi close to her chest.

Chapter Text

Uraraka was led by Shinsou into their room, shutting the door behind them. 

“I wasn’t aware that Todoroki-kun’s theories are so accurate. Maybe Deku-kun is really All Mights illegitimate love child?”, the brunette quipped with a smile gracing her lips. She was seated next to Shinsou on their bed with a brown cat on her lap. 

“Maybe so”, Shinsou said, rubbing their neck, giving her an eye-smile. They cradled a small black kitten with green eyes in their lap and a larger white-ish cat with curious blue eyes sat between herself and Shinsou. 

“This is Satan”, Shinsou introduced the black kitten. Uraraka frowned for a second, before she responded: “Because black cats are devilish?” The purple-haired teen nodded. 

“The cat you have is Mochi”, Uraraka cooed at that, “and this troublemaker is President Cat.” Uraraka let out a full-blown laugh. 

“I assume that President Cat was named by Mic-sensei?” She wasn’t stupid. She knew whom Aizawa-sensei was married to, because of a few framed polaroids in Shinsou’s room and figured as much. 

“Yeah, he was. Satan is mine, Mochi was a gift from Kayama - I mean, Midnight - and the last one is called Kuro. She’s still with Dad.” Uraraka listened to Shinsou explain, while she simultaneously petted Mochi and President Cat, enjoying the cute beings purring in pleasure.

“Shinsou-kun... - Wait, can I still call you that? I mean, do you have another surname?”, Uraraka asked with a thoughtful glance over to Shinsou.

“I took Dad’s surname, officially I am Aizawa Hitoshi. You can just call me Hitoshi though. It’s easier for the both of us, I guess.” She nodded eagerly. “Then you call me Ochako!”

“Ne, Hitoshi-kun…”, the girl bit her lip in thought as she paused for a brief moment. ”Do you still feel responsible for Shigaraki and Deku-kun?” She looked over to them, seeing how they averted their eyes and focused on Satan.

“Yes. You don’t?”

She frowned. “That wasn’t what I said. I just don’t want you to feel bad because we were catched off-guard. It’s not your fault and neither it’s mine. We do feel responsible for it, because we could’ve avoided it. But if you think about it, it could’ve meant that Shigaraki would try to ambush Deku-kun on the street or in an alley where there weren’t any civilians or police. Meaning he couldn’t have gotten any help while he’d fight back. - Because without civilians he would go all out and most likely injure himself again.” She explained, eyeing them out of the corner of her eye while she petted Mochi. “While the entire situation wasn’t nice, the scenario was fortunate.”

“...I suppose you are right”, they admitted after few minutes of silence. “Thank you, Ura- I mean, Ochako-san.” The girl smiled happily. 

 

 

[#bakusquad]

[7:23 pm]

denki: ashido is an alien from area 51, period

mina: oh no how did you find out? owo

denki: was p ez  

hanta: are you high? youre high right

eijirou: guys not that again

denki: haha no

eijirou: we already had a meme war this morning

eijirou: you dont want to blow bakugous phone up with notifications

kyouka: Yes

eijirou: be glad that youre not dead

eijirou: honestly, i am tired of being the baku whisperer

eijirou: get a grip on yourself

denki: sorry man

eijirou: its ok but just minimize your craziness for the sake of our sanity

hanta: sanity? what sanity lmao

katsuki: hey

kyouka: hi

mina: hi baku!!

mina: as we r all here i want you to call me mina

mina: we’v been through so much shit together i think we’re familiar enough wth each other

kyouka: i just came to u guys recently, idk if i should

mina: just do it, jirou-chan, also youve always been a part of our squad

kyouka: mh

hanta: then i am hanta for you guys

mina: i feel like we should all drop the suffixes altogether lol

denki: sure

kyouka: i dont know if im comfortable with that

hanta: take your time

katsuki: If you call me by any shitty nicknames i will drown you

katsuki: but i suppose katsuki is fine

denki: then denki is fine

kyouka: i am not sure

kyouka: just… call me jirou i suppose

kyouka: sorry

eijirou: theres nothing to be sorry for

katsuki: i have to go now the hag wants to eat dinner 

denki: ok bye

mina: hai

Chapter Text

[Class 1-A]

[1:14 am] 

 

goodest pika: wtf rose

goodest pika: the door was large enough for yar  ass AND jack

goodest pika: but nooooooo

 

[Class 1-A]

[2:56 am] 

 

eddrw: you watched titanic i guess

goodest pika: yes

eddrw: how'd you like it

goodest pika: honestly idk

goodest pika: rose is freaking dumb and i am generally not a big fan of romances

eddrw: same

goodest pika: what u watch then

eddrw: horror or action

goodest pika: i don't like horror that much but action is p lit

eddrw: yeet

 

[Class 1-A]

[5:04am]

 

Alien Qween: BETRAYAL

Alien Qween: PIKACHU WATCHED TITANIC W/O ME

goodest pika : sorry

Alien Qween: its okay i am just gonna cryyyy

o(*>ω<*)o : (｡•́︿•̀

Alien Qween: its alright kouda

 

[Class 1-A]

[5:44 am] 

 

Bless King Baku: y were you even awake, mina, denki, kouda

Bless King Baku: i dont even bother to ask abt shinsou

o(*>ω<*)o : （⊙＿⊙；）

Bless King Baku : yes i know all of your fucking names

Shoutowo: Wasn't the titanic a ship? 

Alien Qween: its also a movie

Shoutowo: why

Alien Qween: it's a romance and i love titanic 

Alien Qween: and i was awake bwcause i read smth

Bless King Baku: it better be worth it

Alien Qween: hardly 

Alien Qween: is 'My Immortal' smth yk? 

Bless King Baku: sadly

Alien Qween: ho shit

Alien Qween: idek how i made it through 

eddrw: how did com3 into contact with the sacred t3xts

Alien Qween: i googled ur name shinsou

Alien Qween: and i found a re-up of it

Alien Qween: and i thought,,, how bad could it possibly be

Alien Qween: o hoe was i wrong 

goodest pika: huh

goodest pika: @birb @problem child @Dementia

Alien Qween: omfg jirouuu u know it toooooo

Dementia: todoroki as well

problem child: wha- oh

birb: what a mad banquet of darkness

Shoutowo: moof

Bless King Baku: what the everloving fuckk is a moof

Spidey: i wake up to this

Spidey: why is the world so cruel

Shoutowo: mood and oof

Froppy: i learned something new today and my life won't ever be the same again

Alien Qween: big moof

eddrw: on a scale from kouda to tokoyami how edge r u ashido

Alien Qween: ochako-chan, because denki,,,

Alien Qween: BeCAUSE i cant even say pikachu bc wHO KNows how edge pikachu is

goodest pika: oh hoei.

goodest pika: im barely jirou edge

goodest pika: btw i sense ur struggle, mina. its he/him rn

Alien Qween: thx for letting me/us know

Alien Qween: btw my lovely baes, anyone available tdy? 

Sharky: morning wassup

Fuck Gravity: i have time to spend 

Fuck Gravity: hitoshi as well if they arent grounded? @eddrw

Froppy: Good morning kirishima

Sharky: aye wassup

Alien Qween: hy kiri 

Alien Qween: i asked if any1 has time tdy

Sharky: woah i have

Alien Qween: so far we have ochako-chan, kiri and possibly shinsou

eddrw: i asked i am grounded

Fuck Gravity: ahh so sorry

eddrw: its ok not your fault anyway

eddrw: i cuddle with satan and catnapped kuro so 

Fuck Gravity: oh wont your dad be mad

eddrw: i pretend to be asleep

Fuck Gravity: oh ok if that works, cool

Shoutowo: i have so many questions

Alien Qween: me too but that can wait

Fuck Gravity: wellll shit 

Baguette: Bonjour mes amis~

o(*>ω<*)o: ( ´ ▽ ` )ﾉ

 

eddrw set birb ’s name to dird



problem child: i swear to god they will not find your bodies

Dad: That attitude is concerning, Midoriya-kun!!

Dad: You shouldn’t threaten another classmate, or, even worse, multiple. 

Invisihoe: in my opinion there were too many commas

Tails: moof

Bless King Baku: not you too

Dementia: big moof

Bless King Baku: deku i join you if we can kill earjacks and that other guy as well

problem child: sure kacchan, the more the merrier

Fuck Gravity: We’re still talking about murder, deku-kun!! dont say smth like that! 

Mom: I am more concerned for an eventual team-up of Bakugou-san and Midoriya-san. I don’t think we could survive the resulting mayhem and chaos.

Bless King Baku: fuck yea

Dadzawa: no murder for midoriya and bakugou

problem child: aw no that’s mean, aizawa-sensei

Fuck Gravity: i just fucking chojked on me water wth

Bless King Baku: i choked on your spelling so what

Sharky: oh boi we better dont start that, everybody besides yaomomo and iida is slacking off so you shouldnt throw the brick bakubro

Alien Qween: back to the main topic

Alien Qween: so far me, ochako-chan and kiri are meeting tday - any1 else interested?

Baguette: Moi will join you!!

Alien Qween: great!

problem child: i would like to but my mom is still worried because of yesterday so i better not

Alien Qween: that’s understandable 

Alien Qween: so i guess its me, kiri, aoyama and ochako

Sharky: I asked my moms and its okay if we meet at my place

Fuck Gravity: cool

Baguette: YOu have two moms?

Sharky: yes theyre super nice 

Bless King Baku: they really are

o(*>ω<*)o: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Bless King Baku: add him to the list deku

problem child: will do

Froppy: now there’s a list?

Mom: I am concerned. You remember that Midoriya-san still has notes on each of us in his Notebooks? I wouldn’t want to antagonize him if there is a list now. 

Tails: o shit

Tails: were fricked

Tails: tell my parents ive loved them

Invisihoe: any last words?

Tails: fuck endeavor

Shoutowo: i don’t know how i deserve this 

Invisihoe: i am confusion

eddrw: moof

Bless King Baku: deku

problem child: on it

eddrw: oh shit

Dadzawa: i remember saying no murder for you

Shoutowo: anyone else notice how aizawa-sensei defended shinsou a second after his death and all the others were left to die in a pitch?

Dadzawa: what the fuck todoroki

problem child: yes aizawa-sensei

Dadzawa: i feel like i miss something

Dadzawa: oh for the love of-

Froppy: oh i get it now

Dadzawa: no murder for anyone

Dadzawa: getting someone to do the dirty work for you, i should have expected this

Bless King Baku: lol fuck you

Bless King Baku: wait no-- i regret

 

Bless King Baku deleted 1 message

 

Bless King Baku: i choose life thanks

Yours Truly: If Bakugou-chan and Midoriya-chan are misbehaving you can give them detention under me, Aizawa-kun.

problem child: oh fuck, gotta go

Bless King Baku: suddenly i have shit to do

Alien Qween: now as we’re all reminded not to do murder,,,

Alien Qween: guys head out, meeting at kiris in 30

Chapter Text

[Class 1-A]

[1:01 am]

 

goodest pika: Guys I’ve Watched Inception

problem child: why u always up at night

goodest pika: as if ure 1 to talk

problem child: welllll

goodest pika: thought so

problem child: youre a big meanie :(

Sharky: oh man

goodest pika: y u awake kiri

Sharky: was thinking and couldnt sleep

Alien Qween: abt what?

problem child: oh jeez stop pining already you stupid cucumbers

Sharky: wha-

Alien Qween: cu-

goodest pika: cucumber-

problem child: what?

problem child: oh well, it needed to be said

problem child: i dont have my coffee yet so shush

Shoutowo: you shouldnt drink coffee at one

problem child: y not tho

problem child: its not like i need to be awake tmrw

Shoutowo: we do have school tomorrow, or, today

problem child: rly? 

Alien Qween: yes

Alien Qween: i cant believe you did that and then went onto a simple conversation abut coffee at 1 am

goodest pika: yk if katsu reads that your’e dead mido

problem child: yes

goodest pika: then y did u?

Shoutowo: we’ve talked aboutt that midoriya

goodest pika: btw guys i think kiri broke

Alien Qween: you’re right he didnt write for a long time now

problem child: probably fussing over kacchan by now

Sharky: m-midoriya!

problem child: we all know it’s the truth

Sharky: it isnt!

Alien Qween: jokes on You, we Do

Dementia: whyaretheallofyouevenawake

eddrw: ycantyouwritestraight

Shoutowo: so who’s going to break it to him?

Dementia: iamasstraightasacircle

eddrw: ahiseeyoureatruemanofcultureaswell

Sharky: whx are you writing like that?

dird: whynotisthebetterquestion

Dementia: ohhonestlyyouwouldntwanttoreadourgroupchat

eddrw: yesweallwritelikethat

Sharky: it makes me sick to look at that

goodest pika: ohnothisistheworsttimeline

Sharky: nooo sunshine pal why do you torture me???

problem child: whendidntheisthebetterquestion

Dementia: onlyoneword:yes

Sharky: ALL YOU WRITE IS ONE WORD

eddrw: dontscreamlikethat

Sharky: DONT MUMBLE LIKE THAT

dird: butthisisquiteenjoyable

Sharky: NO!

problem child: yesyesyesyesyesyesyesyes

Sharky: BACK OFF OF ME DEMON

Dementia: ohlookatthatheshavingameltdownfrompiningtoomuchoverbakuhoe

eddrw: ohwoehereallyhas

Sharky: WHY HAS GOD FORSAKEN ME

problem child: wasthereeveronetobeginwith

dird: butdontchangethetopickirishimawecanallseewhatyouaretryingtodo

Sharky: I AM TRYING TO STAY SANE WITH THE BUNCH OF CRAZY MUMBLING DUDES BOTHERING ME

Shoutowo: oh look, it’s multiple midoriyas

 

Dementia set Shoutowo ’s name to suchsassmuchwow

 

dird: youcantescapekirishima

Sharky: WHAT IS EVEN HAPPENING RIGHT NOW

eddrw: wouldntyouliketoknow

 

[A few minutes prior…]

 

[Insomnia Squad]

[1:13 am]

 

Saviour of Insomniacs: I have an idea

Insomni-chu: spill bro

Saviour of Insomniacs: so it’s just us and kirishima and shouto in the class chat, yes?

Lord Insomniac: as far as we know, yes

Insomni-chu: p sure dadzawa is keeping a eye on us tho

Saviour of Insomniacs: figures

Saviour of Insomniacs: anyways

Saviour of Insomniacs: let’s all write in nothing but a word

Saviour of Insomniacs: likethisforexample

Insomni-dow: why though?

Saviour of Insomniacs: why not

Saviour of Insomniacs: the fact that we dont have coffee anymore isnt playing into my plans in any way just to make it clear :)

Insomni-chu: he is going to loose all remaining sanity

Insomni-jack: im in, insomnia squad head out

Chapter Text

[Class 1-A]

[6:00 am]

 

Dad: Please sleep the required eight hours a night, and take your meds if you have problems with falling asleep.

Dad: We should keep a healthy sleep schedule if we aspire to be the best Hero we can be!

Dadzawa: what iida said

Dad: @goodest pika, @problem child, @Dementia, @eddrw, @dird, please write without excessive use of spaces!! It’s not easy to decipher that.

Mom: What Iida-kun said! 

suchsassmuchwow: he used two exclamation marks, you should heed his warning. wouldnt want to find out what happens if you dont

Dementia: i am not afraid

goodest pika: same here

dird: I think I speak for all of us if I say that nobody is that afraid of you. 

eddrw: then you haven’t seen him when you convinced his bro to race down the corridors in his wheelchair and then crash into sm1

suchsassmuchwow: so you were the cause of nee-chans near-death experience

eddrw: that was your sister? damn i am sorry

Dad: And you should be! It was highly irresponsible to convince Tensei-nii to such a frivolous act!!!

suchsassmuchwow: better run shinsou, three exclamation marks

Fuck Gravity: But if iida-kuns brother agreed to it, isnt he responsible as well?

Fuck Gravity: i mean

Fuck Gravity: it wasnt just shinsou-kun

Spidey: she has a point

Fuck Gravity: iida-kun?

suchsassmuchwow: i think you broke him

Froppy: Classchat to @ Dad, please answer

Dad: Uraraka-kun, you are right. Neither Tensei-nii nor Shinsou-kun should’ve endangered Todoroki-kun’s sister.

suchsassmuchwow: shouto. i am not exactly fond of my last name

Dad: I will remember that, Shouto-kun!

Dad: Please excuse me, I am now getting ready for my morning jog.

Alien Qween: have fun

 

[UA]

[6:13 am]

 

AS: @ IT: why

YH: What did he do now?

IT: yes, what did i do?

AS: screenshot114.jpg

AS: screenshot115.jpg

AS: why

YT: You did what with young Hitoshi?

KN: lMao

KN: good mOve Ten-cHAn

IT: ...all things considered, it went better than anticipated. 

IT: Fuyumi-san and I went to a Café so I could apologize properly. Hito payed for us.

YH: so that’s what he used his allowance for

AS: thats beside the point. why.

IT: It seemed like a good idea?

KN: did you mEet up again? :)

YH: that smiley scares me

IT: Not just you, Hisashi, not just you. Anyways, we’re good friends now and meet sometimes. 

KN: soooooo

IT: No. Don’t you dare Nemuri.

KN: Coincidentally I am in possession of her phone numberrr

IT: Nemuri

KN: Yes? :)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

YH: Better run, tensei

IT: yeah

IT: I have something to do, bye.

AS: good luck

KN: Hey, hey, hEy Shouta

AS: ?

KN: what’S up with the names of your class?

KN: the fuck is a dird?

YH: tokoyami i guess

AS: yes

KN: why? who did that?

AS: i think it was jirou or hitoshi. ask problem child what that means

IK: problem child?

SK: Really, who isn’t a problem child in your Class?

AS: kouda. asui. yaoyorozu. iida. ojirou. shoji. aoyama. 

SK: huh

SK: more than i anticipated

KN: who here has midoriyas number?

KN: or jirou or hitoshis?

YH: i have jirous!

 

YH added mcr_is_my_spirit_animal to the chat

 

mcr_is_my_spirit_animal: what

KN: please expLain dird!

mcr_is_my_spirit_animal: i

AS: just do it. the sooner youre outta here the better

mcr_is_my_spirit_animal: aizawa-sensei? ah well,,, weve seen weirder things this term

mcr_is_my_spirit_animal: it was izuku

YT: Young Izuku?!1

mcr_is_my_spirit_animal: what the actual fck

mcr_is_my_spirit_animal: anyways

mcr_is_my_spirit_animal: he typoed dird instead of bird. i can send the screenshot? 

KN: please do

mcr_is_my_spirit_animal: gimme a minute, please

mcr_is_my_spirit_animal: screenshot3267.jpg  

KN: ahahahha

mcr_is_my_spirit_animal: i am confused lol

SK: What is wrong with your Class Eraser?

mcr_is_my_spirit_animal: theres nothing wrong w/ us

SK: Just look at your handle. 

mcr_is_my_spirit_animal: so what? not everyone is dadzawa-sensei or mic-sensei. youre not exactly better than me or anyone of my class for that matter

mcr_is_my_spirit_animal: and i know that at least tetsutetsu from your class has litrally ‘ironiron ironiron’ as his handle

mcr_is_my_spirit_animal: handles are there to tell something abt u. and therefore i see lit no prob w/ any of our handles or nicks vlad king-san

KN: hA! get rekt kan! jirou you R amazing hun! :)))))

SK: Don’t want to know what Aizawa teaches you if you get so aggressive after just one comment. You are truly better off as a member of Class 1-A. In my Class there wouldn’t be something like that.

mcr_is_my_spirit_animal: tbh i am happy to be in my class and i wouldnt want to trade any of em for someone else and now that we got shin its even better

mcr_is_my_spirit_animal: and u commented on my passions and passive-aggressively insulted my fam so just keep it to taming monoma; ur resident bakuhoe in worse and less original

mcr_is_my_spirit_animal: and dontcha dare insult dadzawa-sensei, he is a better teacher than we could ever dream of and that says a lot with denki, kiri, midori, momo and mina-chan in our class

 

mcr_is_my_spirit_animal left the chat

 

YH: U cant see it but eraser is grinning like a very proud dad!!

 

[Class 1-A]

[6:49 am]

 

Dementia: i am confusion

Dementia: but somehow happy

Invisihoe: what happened?

Dementia: i wouldnt dare describe it

Dementia: lets just say i mildly kinda-insulted sm1 or smth along the lines of it

Sharky: I am too afraid to ask,,,

Dementia: should be

 

Dadzawa set Dementia ’s name to purple music child

 

purple music child: owo

suchsassmuchwow: never would’ve thought I would see Jirou-san using owo or uwu

purple music child: fuck you

Dadzawa: fuck endeavor

suchsassmuchwow: can you adopt me please?

Chapter Text

[Class 1-A]

[4:21 am]

 

Alien Qween: just two days left till the camp i am soo pumped!

purple music child: moof

Bless King Baku: i will not hesitate, bitch

o(*>ω<*)o: (つ﹏⊂)

Bless King Baku: youre not even on the list calm the fuck down

eddrw: you really kept that list?

problem child: yes

Mom: I am mildly terrified. 

Invisihoe: we all are

Tails: preach

Arms: since when has Midoriya been so demonic?

Tails: 100% hes always been like this and just hid his true face

problem child: flattery won’t save you

suchsassmuchwow: and if i dont want to be saved?

Bless King Baku: Youre not on the list and won’t ever be

problem child: agreed

suchsassmuchwow: :(

purple music child: now hes sad

purple music child: and guess whose fault it fucking is? 

purple music child: tha angry bomberanian

Bless King Baku: excuse me wtf?? 

Dad: Please.

Dad: Go to sleep. 

Dadzawa: what iida said

Tails: y r we like this? 

eddrw: no idea

Invisihoe: at least its fun 

Alien Qween: moof

problem child: ashido i hope you know what you brought upon yourself

Alien Qween: most likely death lmao

Bless King Baku: yes

Alien Qween: ayeee bring it onnnn!! 

Dad: That attitude is concerning, Ashido-kun. 

Dadzawa: what iida said

suchsassmuchwow: anyone else notice that sensei only ever comes online to save shinsou, remind everyone of the no murder rule and he's always seconding what iida (sometimes momo too) says

Tails: I repeat: y r we like this??? 

purple music child: better question: why is noboey else? 

problem child: we'd die

 

[Class 1-A]

[7:52 am]

 

Sharky: i mean

Sharky: he's kinda right lmao

dird: huh

 

[UA]

[7:54 am]

 

AS: my children are becoming self-aware someone pinch me i fucking can't believe this

KN: youR cHIlDren???! 

AS: i didnt mean it like that and you know that nemuri

KN: oh do i?? 

YH:  how are they becoming self-aware? 

AS: why the fuck are you texting 

IK: ? 

AS: hes right next to me

AS: literally next to me

YH: why are you texting? 

AS: you are

IK: I am confused, can we like… not? 

YH: nah

AS: anyways

AS: at 4 am problem child fucking realizes that everything on this planet would die if anyone else was even an ounce like them

N: They're not at this stage of self-awareness yet, but the potential is there. 

N: But indeed, Midoriya-chan came to the realization that earth's population would decrease in such a scenario. 

KN: huh p liT

SK: it''s always a bit of a culture shock when nezu types something with proper grammar and then theres kayama

KN: :(((((((((((((((((((((

YH: you gave her a reason to be dramatic niw deal with her 

SK: shit

 

[dab on them haters ; stab on them haters]

[8:02 am]

dab on them haters: why

stab on them haters: wh-

dab on them haters: how

stab on them haters: what

dab on them haters: how

stab on them haters: WHAT

 

[Class 1-A]

[8:11 am]

 

suchsassmuchwow: i have a question

problem child: it better not be a ilc theory again

suchsassmuchwow: everything is way more likely than you believe

suchsassmuchwow: i mean

suchsassmuchwow: look at them

Dadzawa: no

dird: bad dird

problem child: JESUS FUCKING CHRIST I WILL FIND YOU AND SELL YOU TO HAWKS 

Fuck Gravity: *gasp*

Fuck Gravity: also- what the hell

suchsassmuchwow: yeah he stated that his favourite food is chicken

dird: but i ain’t a chicken

problem child: DO I LOOK LIKE I CARE

Froppy: no you do not

dird: blease

problem child: NO

suchsassmuchwow: i still have a question

problem child: yea okay spill

Sharky: #whipped

problem child: hahahahahahah 

problem child: seriously?

problem child: you have your own business why dont keep to that?

Froppy: whats your question todoroki

suchsassmuchwow: isn’t it pretty creepy that from the day you are born you start to die?

dird: wh

eddrw: what 

problem child: shouto is everything alright?

suchsassmuchwow: i am fine but.

suchsassmuchwow: am i really the only one?

Mom: Now that you’ve mentioned it, I feel faintly uncomfortable. 

goodest pika: Actually. Fun fact.

Arms: i dread whats about to come

Bless King Baku: why the everloving fuck is he typing so fucking long

goodest pika: if ‘starting to die’ is defined as ‘cells start dying at a faster rate than they are replaced’ then you don’t start dying the day you are born!! you’re still growing and cells are still being replaced pretty quick for about 22 to 25 years

goodest pika: so 25 - THATS when you start to die :D

suchsassmuchwow: huh

Froppy: why do you know stuff like that, kero?

eddrw: why do you have stuff like that memorized

goodest pika: sleep is for the weak lmao

Dad: @Mom, is that true?

Mom: Actually, it is. 

Dadzawa: shouldve just asked anybody thats 25, they couldve told you

suchsassmuchwow: huh

Alien Qween: now i dont want to age past 24

Alien Qween: i am afraid

Invisihoe: me too

Arms: mood

dird: don’t fear for when the dark below will consume you and wrap you in a blanket of darkness

eddrw: for then you yeet

Chapter Text

[Class 1-A]

[6:32 am]

 

suchsassmuchwow: people are weird

Alien Qween: yea

Spidey: maybe u r just th odd 1s out

Alien Qween: b-but i thought we were fam

suchsassmuchwow: turns out u are just bae

purple music child: ok what the fuck

purple music child: who showed shouto memes?? 

Spidey: wasn't me

eddrw: nor me

suchsassmuchwow: nobody from our class

purple music child: that's not reassuring

purple music child: what did it cost? 

suchsassmuchwow: everything...

[stab on them haters ; dab on them haters]

[6:40 am]

 

dab on them haters: i can't believe you've done this 

stab on them haters: this again? i just saw an opportunity and took it

dab on them haters: yes, this again

stab on them haters: too bad

stab on them haters: irdc- if you didn't notice alrdy

dab on them haters: i fucking hate you

stab on them haters: ily2 <3 

dab on them haters: fuck you

stab on them haters: fuck yourself

 

[Class 1-A]

[6:45 am]

 

suchsassmuchwow: i'm going to be offline until the training camp

suchsassmuchwow: see you Saturday

eddrw: sure, have fun or smth

problem child: take care shouto!! 

suchsassmuchwow: thank you

suchsassmuchwow: @goodest pika take care

goodest pika: i'll try

suchsassmuchwow: good enough 

Spidey: aight peeps what's up 

eddrw: the ceiling

Spidey: wh

purple music child: i am disappointed and yet at the same time i am not

eddrw: thank you lieutenant purple

purple music child: no worries major purple

Fuck Gravity: cute

 

Fuck Gravity set eddrw 's name to Major Purple

Fuck Gravity set purple music child 's name to Lieutenant Purple

 

Lieutenant Purple: im not even mad

Major Purple: mood

Alien Qween: it kinda reminds me of m****a

Lieutenant Purple: mina wtf why

Alien Qween: sorry, not sorry hon' 

Fuck Gravity: don't worry! I will fix that horrific parallel 

 

Fuck Gravity set Major Purple 's name to Major Sleep

Fuck Gravity set Lieutenant Purple's name to Lieutenant Music

 

Lieutenant Music: ty ochako

Major Sleep: yee

Fuck Gravity: uwu

 

Major Sleep set Fuck Gravity 's name to uwuraka

 

uwuraka: uwu^^

Dad: Why?

Dadzawa: what Iida said

uwuraka: shouto-kuns theories are scarily correct tho

Arms: what do you mean

Invisihoe: spilllllllllllllllllllllllllllll

uwuraka: uwu

Major Sleep: huh

dird: i hate all of you 

Tails: why

Spidey: THE CREPS R CMING KTSK SND HLPNPLS

Tails: well there goes my question

dird: i still hate all of you besides mezou and yuuga

Major Sleep: welp i can relate

Bless King Baku: same

Lieutenant Music: no surprises there

Invisihoe: what ever happened to sero?

Lieutenant Music: denki, katsu, hanta, mina, kiri r playing minecraft and denki just went and gathered an army of creepers, unleashing them on the castle the others built

Alien Qween: aww shes using our first names now

Lieutenant Music: fuck you ashido

Alien Qween: DDDDDDDDDD:

Spidey: MINA CM  BCK WE NEED YZU 

Alien Qween: gotta blast peeps

Dadzawa: no murder

problem child: we know

Froppy: is midori-chan playing, too?

Lieutenant Music: yeah

Lieutenant Music: he’s the most sane of them

Lieutenant Music: once she acted up he ran away wth everything he could carry that wasn’t denki-proof

Bless King Baku: a’ight fuckers let’s fucking go

Lieutenant Music: thats my cue people

Lieutenant Music: time to slay creepers!!

Sharky: and skeletons and zombie pigmen, sadly


Dad changed the group’s name to Why.

Chapter Text

[Why.]

[7:33 am]

 

Baguette: Mon amis! ☆★~

dird: you have friends?

Baguette: Grossier!

dird: sry i forgot i am friends with you

Invisihoe: how on earth can you forget something like that?

dird: dunno

 

[Why.]

[7:49 am]

 

Diabetis: If you water an apple tree with apple juice, is it forced canibalism?

o(*>ω<*)o: (゜ロ゜)

Alien Qween: i be here on my 5-min break and this is what i find

Alien Qween: whats wrong with us?

 

[UA]

[7:51 am]

 

AS: ashido is becoming self-aware

KN: thIs MUSt be tHe apocaLYpSe

SK: apocalypse is near

AS: you know what? fuck y’all

 

[Why.]

[8:12 am]

 

Arms: do you ever roll up your sleeves to wash your hands and one of the sleeves starts slipping down like it’s attracted to the water and all you can think is ‘dont you fucking dare’

 

[UA]

[8:13 am]

 

AS: and they’re being weird again

YH: damn

 

[Why.]

[8:34 am]

 

o(*>ω<*)o: Do you think regular dogs see police dogs and think “Oh shit, it’s a cop”?

Sharky: and this is the first thing you write? like, why? :x

Dad: Please tell me you’re high. While I couldn’t condone this, it would offer an explanation at the very least.

Dadzawa: what iida said

o(*>ω<*)o: (・ωｰ)～☆

Dadzawa: i just want to die

Lieutenant Music: no 

Major Sleep: don’t

 

[Why.] 

[8:46 am]

 

uwuraka: lets all take a moment and appreciate the fact that biology made it so that our inner organs don’t itch

goodest pika: fun fact:

uwuraka: oh no i am afraid

uwuraka: i am not even 25 yet denki

goodest pika: digestion is actually really painful, but your brain tells ya it’s fine the same way it tells you not to bite off your finger

uwuraka: and looks like i won’t turn 25 anytime soon

Major Sleep: I ask again and only because i have to: 

Major Sleep: why?

goodest pika: sleep is for the weak :333333

 

 [Why.]

[9:53 am]

 

Major Sleep: what does it look like when your cat is plotting to murder you

 

[Why.]

[9:58 am]

 

Major Sleep: wait

Major Sleep: this isnt google

 

[Why.]

[10:05 am]

 

Dad: I have so many questions.

Lieutenant Music: why has god forsaken us

Dadzawa: what iida and jirou said

Spidey: this is the best timeline

 

[Why.]

[10:17 am]

 

goodest pika: do you think pokemon evolve by trading because they think you’re giving them away forever, so in their fear of abandonment they evolve into something better than they were before so you love them again?

Sharky: denki out there asking the real questions

Bless King Baku: THIS is how ya’re spending your fucking break, wtf pikachu

Froppy: are you still playing?

goodest pika: ‘course we are

Lieutenant Music: denki ceased her attempts to overthrow katsuki

problem child: and now we left the hole-ridden castle to venture somewhere else

Sharky: Midori!!

problem child: Aka!!

Mom: At least you’re playing together. 

Lieutenant Music: ...and not electrocuting/breaking/taping/etc. each other

Lieutenant Music: especially not breaking (@problem child)

Mom: What Kyouka said.

problem child: :)

Dadzawa: all of the above

 

[Why.]

[10:32 am]

 

problem child set Diabetis ’s name to SHSL Cook

 

SHSL Cook: thank you?

problem child: :)

Major Sleep: why does :) look so passive aggressive, like, it’s literally smiley face and all, it used to represent happiness now it represents bitterness and resenment

problem child: :)

 

[Why.]

[10:55 am]

 

Bless King Baku: done.

Major Sleep: what?

Major Sleep: the murder? the getting rid of the corpse? the trace removal?

Bless King Baku: there is a no murder rule you dipshit

problem child: we done playing mc

goodest pika: yea!

 

[Why.]

[11:03 am]

 

goodest pika: ah yes, time to do the homework we were assigned over the break

goodest pika: *opens tumblr*

Sharky: so this is where you get your knowledge from!

goodest pika: *watches 25 youtube tutorials*

goodest pika: *sings the entirety of bohemian rhapsody*

Lieutenant Music: you go girl

goodest pika: *read les mis*

Mom: A good choice!

goodest pika: *watches every tom hiddleston interview there is*

Dad: Why.

Alien Qween: oh look its not even a question anymore, its a statement

goodest pika: *writes a novel*

goodest pika: *publishes novel*

problem child: every week of me in a few sentences

problem child: ...ok wow, spoken out loud it does sound weird

goodest pika: *has novel made into 3 movies and one video game*

Lieutenant Music: you sing bohemian rhapsody in full vers. every week?

problem child: …

problem child: yes

Major Sleep: you have a serious problem

problem child: tell me smth i dont know

goodest pika: *takes the ring to mordor*

SHSL Cook: classic

problem child: doing that every week would turn weird very very soon

goodest pika: *defeats lord voldemort*

Mom: Which is important.

goodest pika: me: well…. its too late to start it now

 

Major Sleep set goodest pika ’s name to procrastinating pokemon


procrastinating pokemon: true

Chapter Text

[Why.]

[04:05 am]

 

Froppy: would you eat me if i were dead @Baguette

Baguette: es-tu malade chère?

Froppy: what

Bless King Baku: he asked if youre sick dipshit

Baguette: Oui

Froppy: no i am fine but i heard the french eat frogs

Baguette: and you’re worried i’ll eat you chère?

Froppy: kinda

procrastinating pokemon: dw its just the usual post-3am-madness

procrastinating pokemon: everyone is affected someday

Major Sleep: moof

problem child: i’ll come when you least expect it

Bless King Baku: bitch

problem child: thank you kacchan

Bless King Baku: stfu

uwuraka: but deku-kun you do curse 

uwuraka: why make bakugou do it for you in the chat

problem child: ehhhhhh

Bless King Baku: its easier

Froppy: coming back to my question from earlier

Baguette: no moi will not eat you

Froppy: thank god

 

 

[Why.]

[08:23 am]

 

Dadzawa: jfc kids what in hell is wrong with you?

 

 

[Why.]

[10:31 am]

 

SHSL Cook: august, september, halloween, november, december

procrastinating pokemon: i think you mean august, september, halloween, turkey, christmas

Spidey: i believe it’s spelled hot as balls, fuck it’s school again, halloween, turkey, christmas

Alien Qween: don’t forget new years, forever alone, windy as fuck, shit its raining, allergies, oh hey its actually decent, wait nevermind

Lieutenant Music: ...and a partridge in a pear tree

 

 

[Why.]

[10:56 am]

 

problem child: i was just trying to sleep and then my mum went and asked if i was trying to sleep

problem child: like wtf woman

problem child: what am i supposed to say?

problem child: ‘no i am training to die’

problem child: she should be happy that i try to sleep

problem child: oh

problem child: wrong chat

Baguette: where was this supposed to go?

problem child: nowhere haha

 

problem child deleted 5 message(s)

 

uwuraka: i wonder as i wander

 

[saltier than the dead sea]

[11:03 am]

 

voice of reason: i did an oopsie

princess: both dabs and i did an oopsie

voice of reason: i sent messages that were meant for you to my classchat

voice of reason: thats pretty tame compared to your oopsie, i assume

blue: yeah

princess: there was this group

blue: league of shits or smth 

voice of reasons: are you for fucking real?

voice of reason: guys what was it that i told you

voice of reason: shady business from some handsy-guy is a big no-no

princess: it wasnt handyman

blue: giran was it

voice of reason: istg i will not hesitate to kill him

voice of reason: now, what did you say

blue: we kinda..

princess: accepted

voice of reason: …

princess: pls dont be mad zuku

princess: pretty please!!

blue: zuku we didnt know what was going on

voice of reason: so you decide to up and go with that smoking individuum to somewhere it’s everything but safe and legal and then you just

voice of reason: decide to join them

blue: i am sorry

voice of reason: im gonna fix this

voice of reason: but you will have to tell us all you know

princess: yes please dont be mad zuku please

blue: zuku…

 

voice of reason added AS, Yours Truly, YH and SC to the chat

 

voice of reason: i am sorry that i have to interrupt anything going on right now

blue: clarification: all of us are sorry

princess: dabs and i even more than zuku

AS: I dread where this is going problem child

YH: what did ya do this time

voice of reason : it wasnt me for once

voice of reason: but even i wouldnt be so dumb

princess: we said were truly sorry zuku

SC: What’s going on?

voice of reason : i may have found two (excruciating dumb) people that can - and are willing to - help with the investigation of the LOV

blue: zuku please

voice of reason : i dont have the detectives phone number tho

blue: zuku

princess: please

blue: shes crying just so you know

voice of reason: okay i forgive you but the repercussions are all yours

blue: now shes crying even more

blue: pls snd help zuku

voice of reason: no

AS: ...

YH: you said something about the league of villains?

voice of reason: yeah

Chapter Text

Dabi was staring pensively at their phone, wondering when their life had become like this. Yesterday they were just trying to survive on the streets, while today they waited for their friends and several Pro Heroes near the Academy that they once visited. They sighed. To be completely honest, they wanted to be somewhere else. Everywhere, really, but just not there . 

Memories blurred by smoke and fire, lying deep within those halls, threatening to unravel their past. 

 

 

Izuku wasn’t in the optimal mood to deal with his overexcited classmates. So, he left their chat on his way to their shared school. He had business to attend to, that may or may not decides their future - at least their camping trip. Because the League of Villains isn’t fun to deal with, as they all know. Izuku even more than anyone, his fate tied directly to the Leagues’. Now even more than ever with friends lives’ on the line if they didn’t maneuver carefully.

There was too much at stake and not enough time to dilly-dally. 

 

 

Himiko was excited! She never got the chance to visit UA before and was thrilled to go there - even if it was under dire circumstances. 

Right now, however, she met up with 'Zuku and Dabi in some back alley five minutes from UA. He said he wanted to talk to them in private to ascertain a few things. They agreed - what else could they do? Dabi and her were, once more, indebted to Izuku. There wasn't much they wouldn't do for their precious friend. 

As it was, Dabi was already awaiting them, seemingly lost in thought. They just stood in the alley, head turned towards the entrance, eyes glazed over. 

She decided to snap them out of it, so she jabbed Dabi in the side with the handle of her favorite knife. Then, she took cover behind Izuku. The three of them knew precisely that neither Himiko nor Dabi would lay a finger on Izuku and used him as cover whenever they knew that they did something to infuriate the other. Because even subconciously they wouldn't dare hurt him. 

As predicted the blue embers died down a second after, Dabi snapping back into reality. Izuku just sighed, already accustomed to their little antics. 

"Moving on", he began and subsequently the tension could've been cut with a butterknife, "I wanted to discuss what we do and don't say once we're in." Dabi and Himiko exchanged glances. They both knew that they had fucked up. Massively so. 

 

 

Their next stop was UA, the tall iron gates barely obstructing the view.

Izuku smiled fondly at the institution and proceeded to open his light green backpack to take out their guest ID's; said ID's were plain as day. A sleek silver card with the UA symbol emblazoned on the back and a simple Guest on the front in bold letters, where the Student ID's also depicted a name, recent picture, Departement and Class. 

"Keep them with you", was all he said as he handed them out. Everything noteworthy had been said in that undescripted back alley no eight minutes ago. 

"Yes, yes", Himiko said cheerily and regarded the blank card with wonder. Dabi had an unreadable expression painted on their features. 

"Let's go then", was all they said as they trespassed the (in)famous UA Barrier that would close the school gates once somebody without ID stepped into the land. 

No more words were exchanged. 

 

 

Izuku led his companions to the teacher’s lounge, already much more familiar with the route than he’d like to. His first semester had only just ended, after all.

Nonetheless he knew where to take turns and what path to cross to get to their goal the fastest. 

And then they stood before the door, tall and imposing like everything else in UA. Himiko gasped in wonder, Dabi clenched their fists and had a pained look across their face. They exchanged a last glance and entered the room. 

Unused tables had been pushed in the middle, with chairs and everything in tow. There were several cups on the table, some already filled with coffee or some kind of herbal tea. Izuku appreciated the effort put into this, despite him knowing that this wouldn’t make their behaviour any less hostile.

He could already feel the first doubting eyes on him. He decided to ignore that and grabbed his friends by their wrists instead, effortlessly pulling them into the room. Reluctant steps became surer in their destination and in the end Himiko and Dabi sat to his left and right, respectively.

Opposite himself was Tsukauchi Naomasa, while opposite Dabi and Himiko were Midnight and Principal Nezu. On Nezu’s other side were Yagi and Recovery Girl, while Aizawa and Present Mic were on Midnight’s side. Izuku could see their intentions behind that placement, but kept quiet and forced his friends silently to sit down - one stern look was enough to convince them that their cooperation was of utmost importance. 

The Pro-Heroes, in the meantime, observed how they acted towards each other and tried to find out why two young people strayed from societies path. 

A few were appalled by Dabi’s scars, wondering how far they reached and (in Recovery Girl’s case) how they had come to be. They weren’t something that just appeared over night. She knew that, and Dabi knew that as well.

 

 

Recovery Girl recognized that child beside Class 1-A’s trouble magnet. She knew that their story wasn’t one that was pretty. She knew why they strayed from his former path and she couldn’t even be mad at them.

Pity wasn’t the right solution either, she knew that. And they knew that she knew. So they stared each other in the eyes for a few seconds, saying all that was needed. 

I’ll be here for you if you decide to come back, Touya.

 

 

The tension was high. Himiko decided she would diffuse the situation, because she spotted Dabi pulling at their staples all the time and that was just shit. By the time this was finished they would bleed like hell…

“Hey ‘Zuku”, she said cheerily, pretending that she didn’t feel the beady black eyes of that rat-mouse-bear- thing in front of her. “Y’know I’ve been considering something in the last few days.” She could see his eye twitch and giggled. Dabi quickly caught on and decided to humor her. 

“What was it?” They asked, using their usual flat and monotone voice. If one looked straight ( ha! ) into Izuku’s eyes right now, one could see something dying inside him. His sanity, she decided after a small pause.

“Well, whenever someone near me says something rude or just really stupid I’ll reach into my pocket with a dead expression and release the glitter into the sky above them and watch it shower over them like one big baptism of stupid!”

There was silence for several seconds. Then, Midnight cackled lightly and Yamada covered a laugh with a cough. Izuku just slammed his head onto the desk, letting out a long-suffering groan: “‘Miko why?”, drawing out the o and y really long. 

 

 

Mission success, Dabi assumed. The mood was lighter for but a moment.

Then, the Detective (Tsukauchi Naomasa) cleared his throat, gaining the attention of everyone in the room. He explained that this wasn’t an official interrogation and they had every right to just up and leave, but the three of them understood they had nowhere to go. Now that they had seen their faces, there was really no way they could hide. And, in the worst case, they could decide to hinder Izuku in his pursuit of becoming the next Symbol of Peace to try and lure them and Himiko out of the shadows. 

So.

Not much of a choice there was...

As a matter of question, they stayed. 

 

 

Aizawa observed the children in front if him. Because they were nothing more than that. Children that had been forced to wander a path far off the law. Children with no other way to survive. 

And somehow, these children knew his problem child. He really was a trouble magnet.

He pinched the bridge of his nose. This was going to be a long, long day. 

 

 

The not-interrogation begun. 

“What are your names?” Izuku took a deep breath. They had expected it, of course they had. It was basic information. But. Dabi’s left eye twitched. Himiko pouted. They answered nonetheless. 

“I’m Toga, Toga Himiko.” She decided to show off a fake-smile at the subtle and quick exchange of glances her name brought. 

“Dabi”, they followed in a clipped tone. The detective frowned. And that was all it took for Izuku to remember. His eyes widened. 

Don’t lie, don’t lie, don’t lie, don’t lie- His mind was in a frenzy. And those that were perceptive enough, they knew. They knew that he found out Detective Tsukauchis Quirk (or rather, remembered it) and that he tried to figure out how to warn his friends. 

 

But.

 

If he did, wouldn’t they appear all the more guilty in the process? If they would have to find a way around the truth- wouldn’t that in turn mean they had something to hide? A reason to lie, to cover the truth? Wouldn’t that mean that their suspicions were right? Wouldn’t that mean that their theory of using Izuku to come close enough to the Pro Heroes to harm (likely kill) them, was true? 

There was more at stake than it looked like. 

Himiko shot him glances as he went rigid in his seat. Questioning glances. What’s wrong, ‘Zuku? , she seemed to ask.

Dabi tensed, fingers flexing in the telltale position to use their Quirk. They would destroy whatever caused Izuku harm. And both Himiko and Izuku knew that.

He couldn’t openly sign at them - all of them were good at JSL - in case Present Mic saw something. He had to know JSL. At the very least Nezu and Recovery Girl. 

 

He had no room to act. 

 

So he signed ‘ It’s alright ’ clearly visible over the table, in everyone’s view. 

As Izuku had suspected; Recovery Girl, Nezu, Present Mic… no. All of them knew JSL. Even All Might. No shade on him ( of course not! ),  but Izuku didn’t really expect him of all people to know Japanese Sign Language. 

 

Okay. He could deal with that. 

( No. He could not. But god damn, if he couldn’t pretend as if. )

 

 

“I am afraid that I will have to ask you again, Dabi”, Naomasa said. He watched closely as the young man next to Class 1-As trouble magnet narrowed his eyes. “What’s your name?”

“Dabi’s” piercing blue eyes glazed over for a second. His voice sounded huskier than before as he answered: “I currently go by Dabi.” [ Truth ] His Quirk pinged softly in the forefront of his mind, indicating that “Dabi” spoke the truth.

Naomasa gritted his teeth. 

 

 

Nemuri frowned slightly at the response to Tsukauchi-san’s fairly innocent question. “Does that mean that you change your name every so often?”

Dabi eyed her for a second, before looking at Midoriya like he was seeking out his help. After a few seconds it truly seemed like he did; they had a silent conversation and the blonde girl was as fidgety as Dabi by the end of it.

“It would be better if we would leave it at that for now. Dabi is not changing th- his name ‘every so often’. Th- he changed his name once and that’s it. If we could move on, please?” Nemuri noticed how Midoriya stumbled over his words like a small infant. Pronouns, she observed. 

Interesting. 

 

 

Himiko decided she wanted to hug ‘Zuku. 

No matter how tense the situation was, she would diffuse it with ‘Zuku’s special One-Hundred-Thousand-Million-Giga-Mega-Ultra-Watt-smile. Did she come up with that name on her own? Why, yes she did! 

She leaned over and wrapped her arms around him, startling not only him but also the Pro Heroes. Dabi just pinched the bridge of their nose, already used to her weirdness and wholeheartedly happy with ignoring her during that time. 

“It’s alright, she’s always like this”, Dabi said as Izuku smiled slightly and returned the hug. Himiko grinned. 

Take that, Toushirou.

 

 

Once Himiko returned into her seat, problem child said they should continue or else they would sit here all night. Shouta had to agree and demonstratively poured some coffee into his cup.

And then he salted it. Just because. 

Dabi covered an honest little laugh with a cough and that was worth it to do something so horrible to his treasured elixir of life.

 

 

“How did you come into contact with the information broker whom later introduced you to the League of Villains?” Dabi sighed. Once again. 

“Everybody knows him,” Himiko chirped sweetly as Izuku poured a cup of tea for Dabi and himself, as well as coffee for Himiko. Dabi send her a small glare out of the corner of his eyes and she playfully tilted her head to the side, just like a puppy or kitten. Even if she wasn’t as soft as one, she could pull the puppy eyes well enough. 

“What do you mean? “Everyone”? The underground Heroes don’t even know the name of said broker.” 

Himiko pouted and cradled the mug carefully in her hands, slowly lowering her guard and tucking her feet under her body. She could still easily reach her knives. 

She was the one to answer again. “We won’t snitch on him, he helped us more times than we could possibly try to count. But, I think…”, she trailed off, looking over to them and they nodded at her to go ahead, taking a careful sip of their tea. “Let’s just say that everybody on the streets knows him.” 

The rat-mouse- whatever pressed their … paws together and tilted their head much like Himiko did. “So, it concluded, “once you’re on the streets you know him.”

Dabi confirmed it with a simple nod.

“Unrelated to prior questions; how did you meet the problem child?” The homeless-looking guy asked. Dabi knew better than to assume anything because of his looks. Also, they had Izuku’s ramblings about his favorite Sensei clear in their mind. This was Eraserhead, more commonly known as Aizawa Shouta. And, of course, he was worried for his ‘problem child’, Izuku.

“I met Izu’ through Hime. One day she just disappeared and came back with him.” Izuku kicked them under the table, glaring hard. They just raised an eyebrow at him, wondering what had him upset like that. Then, they had to stifle a laugh.

Izuku pouted, crossing his arms over his chest. “That’s not funny, Dabs. Quit it.” Himiko started to giggle as well, her eyes shining with glee. 

“I met ‘Zuku some time after Dabs and I teamed up. I went somewhere and there he was. I was really, really scared for him when I saw him. So I decided I had to hug him until he was okay again and I, kinda, took him with me. Looking back it may’ve been … something akin to kidnapping? Maybe? But it wasn’t much like that in the end. And then, we met up again and again. Today I would die for Auntie Inko’s Katsudon or ‘Zuku’s Okonomiyaki!”, she told excitedly, waving her hands through the air and almost slapping Izuku in his face. Dabi chuckled and Izu smiled fondly at the energetic blonde. 

“Problem child?”, Eraserhead asked with raised eyebrows to confirm Himiko’s crazy tale. Izu blushed a bit, but nodded. “It’s true.” His voice was small and slightly insecure, but he did his best to smile it away. 

 

 

Himiko wanted to shock them! They always made so funny faces! She had to play her ace now, later in the game it would go unnoticed, not befiiting the trump card that it was. 

And then she did it. She uwu-ed. 

 

 

Yagi’s only thought as he blanked out was a very confused: WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK IS GOING ON HERE?!

 

 

Izuku felt the urge to face-palm. Himiko really was the worst friend. But he loved her all the same. 

“Why did you accept the Broker’s offer?”, Principal Nezu asked in an attempt to bring them back to their (supposedly) main topic.

“Easy. Stain.”

And there it was. He face-desked. 

Sometimes… sometimes he wondered why he had ended up with his surrogate siblings. Why did God hate him? “This is the worst timeline”, he murmured into the table, resisting the urge to scream his heart out. 

 

That was not the right answer, Dabs.

 

 

“Mood, ‘Zuku. But it’s the same for me. I want to protect Izu and we didn’t even know it was the League of Dipshits. It was more like a quicktime event; we didn’t even know what we were doing.” [Truth]

Tsukauchi had never met someone like them in all of his career. He was mildly terrified, but yet at the same time intrigued by how the two youngsters took everything that happened in their life with a raised eyebrow or a challenging laugh. 

 

 

Izuku then looked out of the window and there he was. (A cannibal with wings and a license.)

By then he was so numbed by the craziness in his life that he just shrugged and refocused on the not-interrogation. 

 

 

“On a more important note: what are you guys' pronouns?”, Kayama asked casually, stirring her coffee innocently. The Toga girl grinned toothily, “Dabi” stared at her apathetically and Midoriya had a small grin on his face. 

“Ah, that’s not important. Let’s continue with this hell.” [Lie/Truth] His smile was serene and calm and very satisfied. 

“Of course. What are the League’s plans, what do you know?”, asked Toshinori, one of the first times he actually spoke during their not-interrogation. 

“No idea”, Toga drawled lazily. “I was distracted by Misty, he was looking very serious about everything.” [Truth]

“To be honest we are supposed to meet up in some hours. No clue where. Said they would find us. I remember that they talked about some Vanguard Action Squad-thingy. They said I’d be the leader or something”, “Dabi” informed them. [Truth]

For the first time since the not-interrogation had begun, there was silence that wasn’t weighed down by death glares.

 

 

Izuku spaced out, his mind going a million miles per second. He wondered about Shouto-kun, how he didn’t call him like he had promised he would. But he decided not to worry about it, Shouto knew how to protect himself should it come to that.  

(It was a lie, he was very much worried about him. Yes, Shouto could defend himself but he’d like it more if he was near Izuku and he could help, now that Izuku didn’t break his bones anymore. He just wanted to-)

Izuku had been so immersed in his thoughts that he missed a question thrown his way. It was only when he felt the gazes of many, many people on him, that he did look up from his cup of tea. 

Everyone was staring at him. 

He blushed. “I am sorry. Could you repeat that?”, he asked nobody specific. 

“Do you think your friends are Hero Material?” 

Suddenly, he understood. Why Dabi was so stiff, eyes glazed over, blue embers sparking along their hands and up their arms. Why Himiko’s eyes were filled with tears, her body rigid and hopeful eyes right on him. He hated to do that, but he had to push through. 

“No.”

You could hear a pin drop.

Chapter Text

[PINEAPPLE ON PIZZA IS A FUCKING CRIME DENKI, PERIOD]

[4:21 PM] 

 

eijirou: okay so

eijirou: anyone else got a really weird vibe just now

eijirou: or was it just me?? 

katsuki: jfc get some sleep shitty hair

mina: no kiri ur right

katsuki: go the hell to sleep the both of you

mina: yeah no

mina: i got important things to do

katsuki: which are?

mina: painting my room!!! tooru is helping me out :333333

mina: ---because i got like 0 skills hahaha

hanta: wait. 

hanta: why are you painting your room?

hanta: i thought you just moved in and some painting company did that about 3 wks ago

mina: yeah.

hanta: why?

mina: i didnt like rhe color

mina: dad chose it and i really aint a fan of brown walls

mina: looks like shit

mina: Iiterally

eijirou: pretty manly that you do it by yourself! do your parents know abt it

mina: nah they dont

mina: tooru brought her mothers equip w/ her and we painting it together

kyouka: neat.

kyouka: what color(s)

mina: lavender and black

kyouka: cool

hanta: better than brown

katsuki: (everything is better than brown, dumbass)

denki: yikes

denki: i cant imagine going to sleep witb shit on my walls, like. ew.

mina: ye. i crashed in the living room.

eijirou: and your parents didn't aks questions?

mina: they did but they didnt like my answer 

mina: at all

katsuki: what tf did you say

mina: ok so i told them i dont like the color bc reasons i already stated nd my dad was all like you shoudlve told us!! which. not fair. i totally did. 

mina: but they insisted i didnt and then we had an argument and i ran off to my shitty room and called tooru and she apparently told her mother?? 

mina: and then a little earlier today she just stood at our door with her moms painting equipment and was like, lets go paint it in better colors. bless her soul, btw, she is my new best friend now (sorry not sorry kyo)

mina: and yeah i'm totally receiving a massive scolding in three hrs or so when dad comes from work

mina: but idc 

denki: thats not nice from ur parents but tooru is a queen

hanta: i didn't even know her mother was a painter

mina: me neither

mina: i have to go back helping her now, but im sending u pics when were finished 

eijirou: tell hagakure shes really manly

mina: will do

katsuki: yea invisible girl is pretty ok

mina: awwwe

mina: byeee

kyouka: have fun

 

[Why.]

[4:29 PM]

 

problem child left the chat

 

Sharky: uh, what just happened?

Arms: no clue

SHSL Cook: does anybody know anything?

Froppy: He didnt mention anything in our group chat

o(*>ω<*)o:  (｡╯︵╰｡)

Major Sleep: im gonna go and ask

Mom: Yes please, I am worried for him.

 

[mad banquet of dirdness]

[4:32 PM]

 

coffee: hey midori 

coffee: wanna tell what’s wrong

thunder: yea whats up

shadow: you worry y-/our friends

fluff: im alright

no music no life: why leave the class chat then

fluff: i already said i am alright, i just have no time right now

 

fluff left the chat

 

thunder: what just happened

coffee: no idea

 

[Why.]

 [4:34 PM]

 

Major Sleep: bad news guys

Major Sleep: he left our chat, too

uwuraka: yeah same, he said he is alright and then. nothing.

 

[Iida Tenya ; Shouto]

[4:36 PM]

 

Iida Tenya: Hello Shouto-kun, I know that you are most likely busy right now and must have muted our Class Chat, but this is very urgent. 

Iida Tenya: It concerns Midoriya-kun; he has been acting rather strange today. He left our Class Chat, as well as the Deku Squad Chat and the Chat with Shinsou-kun, Tokoyami-kun, Jirou-kun and Kaminari-kun.

Iida Tenya: Please call me as soon as you receive these messages. It could be another Code Stain, even if such a scenario is most unlikely. We can't exclude it from the possibilites, however, because he really is a trouble magnet.

 

[Why.]

[4:40 PM]

 

Baguette: I am worried

uwuraka: we all are

Dad: I just messaged Shouto-kun, maybe he is in the know.

Froppy: good idea

Lieutenant Music: tbh i dont know what we should do now

Bless King Baku: maybe something like this: @Dadzawa

procrastinating pokemon: oh wow, we really are stupid

Chapter Text

um, hey. i wanna tell you something real quick.

i know i haven’t been the most consistent with chapters lately. or ever before, to be completely honest with you. but i want this fic to make it, i want to push through because so many people read this and i can’t just abandon them. 

as of late i’ve ran into a problem regarding this. 

 

you see, i feel like i should discontinue this. i feel like i should delete this. it’s not even good, i know that.

at first i pushed past all my doubts. you commented, i talked with people and i genuinely enjoyed that you actually had fun while reading my stuff instead of criticizing everything.

but recently i can't form coherent sentences while writing. it’s not a block, because i don’t think something like writer’s block really exists. or ever existed. 

 

but the facts still remain; i feel like drowning. like the world spun too fast and i stumbled to the ground. and now i can't get up.

 

everything has been way too hard lately.

i tried to let it out by writing the hell outta it but it didn’t help me. at all.

...

now i need some time to gather myself. 

i need some time to start living again, to stop just existing in some corner while everything and everybody pushes me down once more.

 

updates are unlikely for some time. and even if something goes online i can’t answer when the next update will be. i am so sorry for that. but i just. can’t carry on at the moment. 

 

i just wanna feel alive again. 

so this is put on the back burner until i am okay again. 

Chapter Text

Hey guys! 

Much happened in the past month and I've come to the conclusion that I am unable to continue this small story! Sorry to anyone that had high hopes for whatever would come next. I simply lost the motivation I once had for this and my mental state is also not really the best right now.

Further, I've decided to put this work up for adoption, so if you are interested, hit me up and I'll spill the beans on what I had planned storywise. For example the Training Camp and who the Traitor is, etc. Also the Ships everyone should end up in and also the aftermath of the situation with Dabi and Himiko and how and if they're going to be affiliated officially with the League of Villains. Or just how they came to know each other and other little things. 

Thank you for your support and rest assured I'll answer to all your sweet messages on my last announcement in due time. Um, in fact, I'm going to print out your responses, or just those I really needed in that moment. I truly appreciated - and still do - the sweet things y'all said. It lifts my spirits every other day where getting up is a laughably hard task.

Thank you so much for so many Kudos, Comments, Bookmarks and Hits and Subscriptions. 

You're free to visit my Twitter Account and yell at me or anything else, really. You can also check out my profile and my other works if you're still interested in my writing.

Love y'all! <3