I'm The Captain Of My Story
Later that same evening, Elly was at the school, checking in on Susan as she was with Yashvi who was retaking an assessment she had messed up on. Elly was frustrated that she had sent Chloe several messages and called her several times without a response.
Why hasn’t Chloe called me back? Where is she? Has something happened to my Chloe?
As Elly reached the classroom, she asked her aunt if she was nearly done, which Susan confirmed before looking at Elly, looking fine in her light brown coat over her black dress, and asked if Elly was going out somewhere. Elly clarified that she was “waiting for Chloe to get back to me about these concert tickets,” knowing that she had accidentally sent one of her messages about the concert to Susan earlier instead of Chloe so Susan knew about it.
Yashvi, who was staring down at her phone, blurted out without thinking, “She’s on a hot date with Pierce so I doubt you’ll be hearing from her tonight.”
Are you fucking serious? My Chloe who has been in love with me for the entire year and broke up with me a couple of days ago is already on a date…with fucking Pierce!? What the hell, Chloe!
Elly tried to compose herself as she asked Yashvi, “A date?” Yashvi looked up at Elly, clarifying, “Just as friends. She’s at a movie premiere. That’s why you wouldn’t be hearing from her. Not for any other reason.”
“Yeah, of course,” Elly struggled to remain composed at the news, knowing full well Pierce still had feelings for Chloe and the idea of him taking her out “as friends” made Elly sick.
I really have lost Chloe, haven’t I?
Susan crossed the room to stand in front of Elly, as Elly realized, “I guess I won’t be hearing from her tonight.”
‘As friends’…Chloe’s going to end up with Pierce tonight in his bed, isn’t she? In an attempt to get over me quickly, she’s gonna rush straight into Pierce’s arms…if she isn’t already there. The thought of him holding her like that…I never even came close to having a second chance of being with Chloe again…’cause I was too damn frightened to admit just how much I was falling for her…
Susan saw the look on Elly’s face, knowing exactly what Elly was assuming would happen between Chloe and Pierce, “You’re allowed to have a reaction, it’s only natural.” Elly tried to bluff past her Aunt’s concern, “I only care about the tickets. Chloe’s free to date whoever she wants.”
I don’t mean that at all…and Suze knows it…
Susan then offers to give Elly a lift home, but Elly declines the offer, deciding to walk home on her own instead after grabbing some food on the way.
So, I can get home after everyone else does. Crawl up into bed with my food, my breakup play list and cry myself to sleep at the thought of Chloe spending the night with Pierce…why did my life go so wrong that I couldn’t have found a way to tell Chloe how deeply I do care about her?
Susan took the opportunity to reassure her niece, “You and Chloe have a strong friendship. It’s strong enough to survive anyone else who comes into your lives.”
Replace the word ‘friendship’ with ‘relationship’ and convince me again that Chloe and I can survive someone like Pierce coming into Chloe’s life and that I will have a chance one day in the future to set things right with Chloe and be with her.
“Yeah, I know that,” Elly replied to Susan, unconvinced, “I told you, we’re fine. Bye.”
Before Susan could utter another word to tell Elly that she could tell just how heartbroken Elly was at the news that Chloe might already be dating again, Elly took off down the hallway.
Later on, Elly had grabbed her takeaway dinner and was crossing through the empty Lassiters complex in front of Harold’s when Pierce came from out of the bushes and walked up to her, “Elly. Hey.”
Well, at least Chloe’s not in your bed with you tonight…maybe Chloe hasn’t moved on and I still have a chance with her…
“Pierce, hey,” replied Elly, in frustration that she didn’t want to talk to the guy attempting to steal Chloe from her, and yet couldn’t brush him off, “I thought you’d be out with Chloe tonight.” “Yeah, I was but I’m glad I ran into you actually,” Pierce told her.
Really? What could the tree branch masquerading as a good guy possibly want from me? Here to blame me for Chloe not falling into his bed so easily tonight?
“Really?” Elly just about snorted her surprise that he wanted to talk to her. Pierce replied, “Yeah, well, I don’t want to make this awkward…”
Then say ‘bye bye’ and go back to hiding in the bushes where you came from!
Pierce persisted, “But I can’t just stand back and say nothing. I don’t think you’re considering Chloe’s feelings.”
Chloe’s feelings are the thing I consider at the moment. Chloe says she wants us to be friends…I’m considering her feelings and respecting that. How about you consider Chloe’s feelings by not trying to get her into your bed so soon after she broke up with me?
“What are you talking about?” Elly settled on asking Pierce. “Like tonight, y’know, calling her constantly,” Pierce explained. “Pierce, it’s none of your business,” Elly yelled at him as she tried to take off away from Pierce but he followed her, yelling out to Elly, “I care about how Chloe feels.”
Elly turned back to Pierce, “We don’t need you to care!”
Me, Chloe and a whole lot of people that do actually support the pair of us…if more people would give us time to sort through our relationship rather than judging us then you’d be on your own, Pierce.
“There is no ‘we’ anymore. Okay, you guys broke up,” Pierce pointed out.
‘We’…fuck I really do think of Chloe and I as a ‘we’…that we’re still in a relationship…and now I’ve just blurted that out to the one person who’s more than happy to remind me of the fact Chloe and I are not in a relationship.
“Yes, I’m very well aware of that,” Elly stressed to Pierce. Pierce continued laying into Elly, “Chloe didn’t answer her calls for a reason. You didn’t need to keep calling her.” “I was just trying to organize something,” Elly tried to reason with him.
I just wanted to hear Chloe’s voice.
“You’re making it impossible for her to move on,” Pierce told Elly.
And there it is, Pierce! The problem you have with me has nothing to do with Chloe’s feelings. You just can’t stand the fact that Chloe is in love with me and isn’t able to move on to you so quickly. As long as Chloe has those feelings for me, I’m always gonna be in your way whether I’m with Chloe or not!
Elly retaliated straight back at Pierce, “Which is making it impossible for you to make a move! Right? That’s what this whole issue is about?”
Why do I feel like I said that for more than just myself and Chloe and there are more people out there that do support us?
Unable to admit that Elly knew damn well she was right that she was in his way from being with Chloe, Pierce insisted, “I’m only saying this because I care about how Chloe feels, alright? If anyone’s thinking of themselves it’s you.”
Could you be more of an arrogant prick, Pierce? Step up from been a tree branch but whatever.
“Oh, Pierce, whatever!” Elly announced as she brushed beside him, frustrated that he had gotten under her skin and also Chloe could possibly fall for someone who didn’t respect her.
Seriously. ‘Oh, Pierce, whatever!’ I’m not just saying that for me…I feel like everyone wants to say that when they meet this guy!
Deep in her anger at Pierce for accosting her over the way she was treating Chloe, Elly stormed away from him but wasn’t watching where she was going, quickly finding herself missing the step of the boardwalk bridge she was on and falling to the ground in a heap on her baby bump.
Steller exit, Elly! Argh fuck my baby! This is the last fucking thing I need to happen that I’ve gone and hurt my baby.
Elly is soon crying on the ground in pain after her fall. Pierce races three steps over to her, attempting his hand at concern, “Elly, you okay?” “I’m fine, I’m fine, just leave me alone,” Elly yelled at him.
The last bloody person I need help from is you!
“No, you’re not fine, I’m calling an ambulance,” Pierce decided. Giving in to the realization that she couldn’t turn away help for her baby, even if it came from the form of Pierce, Elly told him, “Hurry, please.”
And call Chloe too, once the ambulance gets here and takes me to hospital.
The next morning, Chloe was still at the hospital with Elly. She’d arrived immediately upon hearing about the accident, staying late until Elly had returned from her scans. Despite been told the baby was stable, the scans would provide more results in the morning. Karl had informed Chloe upon arriving back at the hospital the next morning that Elly and the baby would be fine but would need to stay in hospital for a few days.
Chloe had insisted on staying with Elly through the morning to support her friend even though both Karl and Susan had recommended that Elly already had the pair of them looking out for her. Chloe wouldn’t be persuaded from spending time with Elly.
Taking a moment to duck out and get a coffee, Chloe found Pierce stumbling into the hospital hallway, wanting to check that Elly and the baby were okay. Pierce quickly revealed that Elly’s fall was a result of an argument that he had had with Elly over her treatment of Chloe since the breakup.
Chloe was furious with Pierce and his involvement in Elly’s fall having put himself into the middle of the situation with Elly that he shouldn’t have been in. Chloe’s feelings that Elly had managed to go back to being friends too quickly after their breakup was not something Pierce should ever have involved himself in despite Chloe telling him how hard the breakup had been to deal with for her.
It was for Chloe to sort out with Elly. Chloe had been spending the last few hours that morning with Elly as well as bit of time with her the previous night after Elly had returned from her scans and Chloe had avoided addressing how hurt she was feeling from the breakup and continued time with Elly was hurting her even more.
But now that Chloe had gone off at Pierce about his interference, she was reminded more and more how much it had pained her the previous night to keep getting the messages and calls from Elly extending the hand of friendship too quickly and too much, and knew that she needed to voice her concerns with Elly before it hurt her anymore.
Chloe walked back into the hospital room, unsure how to address this issue but knowing she needed to.
“Chloe,” Elly stated as Chloe re-entered the room where Elly sat in the hospital bed, weirdly feeling like she was surprised to see Chloe back in her room again, fearing the blonde would eventually bail on her.
“So, I just ran into Pierce and he told me what happened,” Chloe told Elly.
That I was still referring to us as a couple? That I told him that I’m in his way of Chloe moving on to him? That Pierce thinks all I care about is myself and that couldn’t be further from the truth? I was trying to avoid telling Chloe that I got into an argument with Pierce because I’m trying to prove that the pair of us can still be friends. I didn’t want to let on that I know about their movie “date” and how much it’s hurting me to think Chloe could possibly be moving on from me this quickly…
“Okay,” was all Elly could respond with, worried how much Pierce had told Chloe about her overreaction to Chloe moving on with him. Chloe then apologized, “I am so sorry, he’s such an idiot, like bigtime, nosy, know-it-all, stupid man-child--”
I mean go on degrading the jerk, Chloe, but if Pierce didn’t tell you how upset I am that I’m the one in his way to moving on with you…then I need to know if Pierce was right when he told me that I was hassling you too much last night trying to get in contact with you to hear your voice…to organize the concert tickets…
“Chlo,” Elly interrupted her rambling, “You need to tell me, have I been clingy with you?”
Okay, well I guess I didn’t need to worry about the right way to bring it up when Elly is already doing it for me…and it’s not ‘clingy’…it’s just you’re immediately back to friendship mode and I’m a long way from that.
Chloe couldn’t find it in her heart to be able to answer Elly about how hurt she really was that Elly could move on from their breakup so easily back to friendship.
I guess that answers that, Chlo…I have been too clingy because I don’t know how to live my life without you in it…
“Right,” Elly sighed at Chloe’s silent confirmation. “It’s okay, I get it, totally. You didn’t want to lose our friendship,” Chloe tried to assure the brunette. “It means so much to me,” Elly admitted, “After everything that happened with Mark, I don’t want to lose you again.”
Urgh, why did you bring up Mark as one of the reasons for not wanting to lose Chloe? It’s because we’ve been through so much the past few weeks that you don’t want to lose her again.
“Guess I could’ve just said I needed space,” Chloe admitted, throwing her hands out as she stood there opposite the hospital bed. Elly looked down before glancing back up at Chloe, “Wish you didn’t have to.” Chloe moved to sit down on the edge of the bed but held back from reaching out for Elly, the way she’d become accustomed to the past few weeks, “Elly, we’ll always be friends and times like these I will always be here for you.”
But I can’t be right now.
But you can’t be right now.
“But I need to get over you somehow,” Chloe continued.
I have to.
I don’t want you to.
Chloe took a deep breath, “And it would be great if you could help me do that.”
I don’t want to…
“By leaving you alone?” Elly asked Chloe gently that that’s what she needed from her. “I’m alright and we’re alright, really,” Chloe replied in a way of answering.
I’m not alright…I’ll never be alright trying to get over the woman I love for the rest of my life.
I think back to all those times Chloe asked me for space after I found out how she truly felt about me…I couldn’t give it to her…I couldn’t be apart from her…it took me most of the year to figure out why. I need to stop been selfish and focusing on my need to be around Chloe…I need to give Chloe what she needs from me now…space.
“But you need space?” Elly asked quietly, accepting it when Chloe nodded back at her gently.
Space to let me get over you…if that’s even possible…or to give you a chance, Elly, to prove that timing is all that’s stopping us from having a chance with one another one day…
Space to let Chloe get over me…instead of sitting here and fighting for Chloe…proving that with a bit more time…I can get to that place with my feelings for her that she wants from me before the baby comes…it’s what Chloe wants…I need to do this for her. If timing is the only thing truly wrong between the pair of us…we’ll still have a chance one day…
To Be Continued?