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No killing game, just chaos

Chapter Text

sad and gay: i just wanna get dicked down again :/

boys r gross: omg

useless bi: wait by who?

sad and gay: ;^)

sleeby: omg seconded

useless bi: Im so confused

ultimate lesbian: hajime be like dumbass noises

useless bi: but I didnt fuck him is why im so confused

ultimate lesbian: bet

sleeby: bet

sad and gay: bet

boos baby: bet

useless bi: I DIDNT! IVE BEEN WITH SODA

baby shark: two bros at the beach

hongry: maybe right now

hongry: but we all hear ur dorm at night

useless bi: like me snoring or having an exstisencal crisis?

sad and gay: hes just shy ;;;

boss baby: we all know u been fuckin

useless bi: I DO NOT FUCK HIM

xxxSceneQueenxxx: ibuki spots a lie!

usless bi: I dont!!

cermet kin: youre right Hajime, you dont fuck him! He, fucks you

Usless bi: MIKAN!!!

baby shark: oof she got you bro

usless bi: NO SHE DIDNT

xxxSceneQueenxxx: MIKAN HJHKDJFHKDFJHKFDHKFDHFKL

boys r gross: IM YELLING

ultimate lesbian: HOLY--

sword mom: is she possesed

brat: wow hajime, I knew you were stupid and usless but to stoop so low is so astounding

sir. shits-a-lot : guess Hajime has a hard time shitting after nights like that. EAT MORE BRAN!! TAKE GOOD HEALTHY SHITS!! KEEP YOUR BODYING GOINg!!

hongry: so moving..

boss baby: very loud ????

hamster fucker : it seems hajime is going to kill himself, I heard him screaming and running down the hall. How unfortunate. Whats more unfortunate is how Im going to kill him first for waking my 4 dark devas of distruction

sleeby: GUNDAM R U OKAY

xxxSceneQueenxxx: HDKJHSKJDHJDHDSSKJHDK

usless bi: SHIT HES ACTUALLY NARUTO RUNNING BEHIND ME WITH HAMSTERS ON HIS ARMS, FUCKKKK

hamster fucker: you may be fast, but the hamsters are faster

useless lesbian: f

boys r gross: f

sleeby: f

sad and gay: f

hongry: f

sword mom: f

xxxSceneQueenxxx: f

boss baby: f

Chapter Text

think emoji: taka has thicker thighs than junko

best boy: i have no idea what to do with that information

tits: i still win in the boobs department so im good

lesbean: cries over my gf

doNUT : wait, isnt that me Sakura?

lesban: y e s...........

ultimate disappointment: here I was thinking I was the ultimate disappointment

im better than you : still are

hope more like help :cant you all just be nice to one another?

best boy: oh! touko! how was your date with komaru!

loud dad : No Byuakya is a cunt

money: TAKA

ultimate disappointment: mm...it was...n-nice..

think emoji: HOLY SHIT

ultimate disappointment: DONT TELL HER I SAID THAT

famous bitch: we get it touko ur gay but TAKA JUST CUSSED

id fuck a motorcycle: jesus christ

best boy: oh my lord

loud dad: IT HAD TO BE DONE

im better than you: I want to fire back but, for once I dont have words to fight that

tits: TAKA STOPS BEING A WET BLANKET JUST TO ROAST TOGAMI IM

weeb: You are all iteruppting my reading time!

its weed: my new fave holiday

money: shut up hifumi

ultimate dissapointment: yOu ArE aLl iNtErUpTinG mY ReAdIng TiMe

baseball SUCKS: Yo what the fuck

lesbean: i come to love my gf

lesbean: i cant have a single thing huh

Chapter Text

famous bitch: yall r smelly

cryptid: thx

its weed: we know

Hope more like help: no one gives a fuck, we don’t respect or negotiate with thots

Hope more like help: aka you

think emoji: DAMN MAKOTO REALLY WENT FOR IT HUH

I’m better than you: takes thots to know Thots

Weeb: hes still salty she rejected him

doNUT: WHOS COOKING I SMELL IT

ultimate disappointment: its pussy and you aren’t invited

doNUT: I get everything I need over here you fanfic whore

baseball SUCKS: SHE CALLED TOKO A FUCKING WHORE

I’m better than you: no shit we can read

think emoji: YALL I

Hope more like help: I sometimes wish the nightmares I get of a stuffed bear killing us would come true

bestboy: wait u get those too

I’d fuck a motorcycle: for the love of god could you all just either kill each other or shut the fuck up

best boy: @id fuck a motorcycle HE GETS THEM TOO

Id fuck a motorcycle: oh. Damn.

Weeb: MY MANGA IS WAITING PAITENTLY AND YOU ALL DISTRACTING

tits: i have dreams i am the bear.....

doNUT: then turn off notifications and fap away from everyone else, you number two fanfic whore

lesbean: BABY

Weeb: ITS NOT FANFICTION ITS REALISTIC READING ART

money: local cute swimmer fucking flames everyone

doNUT: don’t get your balls in a twist and go away

I’m better than everyone: I’ve never seen the class so angered until the whole who ate the cheesticks fight

I’d fuck a motorcycle: I still think it was Makoto

Hope more like help: EVEN IF IT WAS I DESERVE IT MORE THAN ALL OF YOU

doNUT: BITCH I BOUGHT IT

Weeb: YOU DIDNT BUY IT YOU STOLE IT FROM ME AND HANDED ME A BODY PILLOW INSTEAD

doNUT: IT WAS PAYMENT YOU HENTAI FUCK

tits: my money is on mukuro

cryptid: fuck off you fake tits looking ass

money: I WILL PAY U ALL TO SHUT UP

Loud dad: I AM THE ONLY ONE LEAGALLY ALLOWED TO BE LOUD. YOURE ALL TAKING THIS FROM ME

Hope more like help: I’m sorry Taka but can I borrow the loud pass

Loud dad: as you wish, but I’ll need it back

Hope more like help: FUCKING STUPID ASS BITCHES I GET THE LOUD PASS!!

doNUT: I DONT NEED A PASS TO BE LOUD! CLEARLY NEITHER DO YOU AND KYOKO!!

I’m better than you: oh my god

famous bitch: please excuse my potty mouth SHUT THE FUCK UP

I’d fuck a motorcycle: she went there. She brought up sex. Chihrio run.

best boy: mondo.........

best boy: u have.... no room..... to talk.......

baseball SUCKS: I’ve never been so afraid of a small hungry woman in my life and I play with balls for a living

doNUT: I WILL FUCKING DESTROY YOUR PRIDE LITTLE UNTIL YOU GIVE ME DONUTS WHEN I WALK IN THE HALLS BECAUSE IM A FUCKING FLAME QUEEN

its weed: MONDO TAINTED CHIHIRO

lesbean: hina ur so pretty ily

money: sakura pls...

Ultimate disappointment: no one else notice how neither Kyoko or Makoto have said anything since she went off on them for fucking really loudly

think emoji: makoto is like. really red.

Loud dad: Makoto I’m taking the loud pass back now

Hope more like help: NO I NEED IT

think emoji: hes been laying on me and groaning for 5 minuts

doNUT: trust me we hear more than “groaning” on you alllllll night long

doNUT: “kyoko!~” “mmf, Makoto~”

Hope more like help: PLEASE STOP I CANT PHYSICALLY TAKE IT

famous bitch: MAKOTO GETS PEGGED

Hope more like help: I DO NOT

baseball SUCKS: I’m sorry dude, but you do

Weeb: insert the y’all out here afraid to me quiet but I be in my girl ear like: meme

doNUT: okay that was fucking funny, maybe he can stay

its weed: SDFGHJHGFRE

tits: boys get pegged.

I’d fuck a motorcycle: no.

Baseball SUCKS: it’s not pegging if it’s an actual cock

Loud dad: please, children, for the love of god. SHUT THE FUCK UP

best boy: i fucking cant

its weed: CHIHIRO SAID FUCK

Ultimate disappointment: some girls even get pegged. We’re lesbians. We need, it. Speaking of Makoto I’m fucking your sister

Hope more like help: TOKO PLEASE I DONT NEED TO KNOW

lesbean: we been knowing toko

Ultimate disappointment: no I mean like now

Ultimate disappointment: like right now

think emoji: KOMARU NAEGI IS A BOTTOM

Hope more like help: P L E A S E S T O PLPPPPO

ultimate disappointment: I’m fucking your sister makoto. Deal with it.

its weed: AM I THE ONLY ONE WHO SAW CHIHIRO SAY FUCK

Chapter Text

sir. shits-a-lot: I LEFT YOU YOU ALL HEALTHY BOXES MOSTLY FILLED WITH BRAN, AND I FOUND ONE IN THE TRASH! WHO ISNT EATING RIGHT AND TAKING PROPER SHITS!!?

sad and gay: bran is so despair inducing... such ultimates should never eat that...

sir. shits-a-lot: ILL SHOVE HEALTHY INTO YOUR BODIES ONE WAY OR ANOTHER!!!

sword mom: im sorry nekomaru but no one likes bran..

xxxSceneQueenxxx: kinky!

usless bi: AM I THE ONLY ONE WHO ACTUALLY ATE IT?

boys r gross: OHHHH HAJIME NO....

sleeby: f

usless bi: OH GOD, I FEEL IT!

hongry: holy fuck

ultimate lesbian: we need a baby sitter

baby shark: no one use the boys bathroom for a while...I just heard sprinting and saw hajime clenching his ass

brat: ew gross!

sad and gay: fucking rip

Chapter Text

cryptid: u know how theres a junko fanclub

cryptid: izuru and i are starting a junko hateclub

tits: my OWN SISTER :,,,,(

think emoji: where do i sign where the fuck do i sign

famous bitch: i

hope more like help: H-Hey hate is a strong word there guys

im better than you: Really, it is? Is it as strong as love?

hope more like help: Yeah!

Im better than you: in that case, I hate you Makoto

doNUT: And we hate you four eyed rich cunt who wont come out of the closet

lesbean: BABY NO loud dad: NOT AGAIN!!

weeb: Ill take my leave early

money: And let the flaming begin

doNUT: ...

doNUT: No one gonna say anything about celeste just--

hope more like help: SH! THATS FOURTH WALL BREAKING, WE ARENT DEAD HERE!

ultimate dissapointment: aw darn

id fuck a motorcycle: I got a bandaid, can we fix the wall???

hope more like help: ....thats not how you fix it..

its weed: WAIT WHAT DO U MEAN DEAD R WE ALL GHOSTS

best boy : hiro not again....

baseball SUCKS: Did your drinks get spiked? We're fine! God you losers act so crazy, like I killed someone

cryptid: guys shut up im trying to get dick

tits: wait someone likes u enough to fuck you

cryptid: strangely, yes hope more like

help: YOURE TRYING TO WHAT

think emoji: ppl have sex makoto

loud dad: THERE ARE CHILDREN PRESENT

best boy: you act like i dont get dick daily

im better than you: Not everyone has sex you know

think emoji: byakuya we get it youre sad and in love with my boyfriend

[im better than you has left the chat]

its weed: IS NO ONE GONNA AKNOWLAGE CHIHIRO AGAIN

hope more like help added im better than you to the chat

im better than you: sorry I glitched, didn't see your message

ultimate dissapointment: thats as fake as my love was for you

money: HGDAJHGDFJFd

doNUT: and with that im gone

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sad and gay: @izuwu where r u hajime's freakin out

izuwu: Tell him I said fuck off Im getting laid

sleepy: ,,,,why r u texting during sex

boys r gross: omg

izuwu: Because I can satisfy myself and someone else while still doing whatever I want

xxxSceneQueenxxx: SIS I--

boss baby: who are you even fucking?

useless bi: OH good god who would let you within a ten food radius??

izuwu: Stay out of my life fuzz ball, it doesnt matter

sir-shits-a-lot: THEY SAY YOURE SUPPOSED TO PEE AFTER SEX, I TAKE A HOT SHIT!!!

hongry: NEKOMARU TMI

hamster-fucker: I dont think thatll help

baby shark: Heres the solution! Dont have sex! I havent in ...how old am I?

boss baby: soda come over

usless bi: youve had sex before Soda, after all, depression really fucks you in the ass

sword mom: OH NO

baby shark: Damn...deep. also sure Fuyu, should I bring video games and snacks?

usless bi: Soda....he means you're the snack

 baby shark: huh?

boss baby: get a fucking condom and come the fuck over

brat: Wow, boys really are idiots!

xxxSceneQueenxxx HJKSADHKDJSHKJASD

boys r gross: true baby

Baby shark: OH ARE WE GONNA BLOW IT UP AND WEAR IT ON OUR HEADS??

 Usless bi: Hes beyond our hope

sad and gay: h..hope?

ultimate lesbian: EVERYONE RUN

cermet kin: He said the H word!!!

 princess: Everyone evacuate the dorm! This is a code H! Report to the common room ASAP

sleeby: GOTTA YEET

sir-shits-a-lot: GOTTA SHIT

Chapter Text

think emoji: daily reminder i love my ball of sunshine

Hope more like help: Aw, I love you too!

tits: nastie

cyrptid: fuck off let ppl be happy

tits: no u

Weeb:Your nickname is litterally tits, your nasty

doNUT: HIFUMI YOU FAP TO FAKE TITS

Weeb: THEY ARENT FAKE, JUST SIMPLY 2D!!

lesbean: SHES ALWAYS HERE.. RIGHT AFTER HIFUMI SAYS ANYTHING

lesbean: im so in love

doNUT: You know it babes

LoudDad: Children calm down

best boy: fuck off dad

weed: CHIHIRO--

Im better than you: Read my name

famous bitch: welp

LoudDad: CHIHRO, BYUKYUA, TIME OUT! SO STAND BY JUNKO FOR 15 MINUTES!

tits: wait why me

best boy: WAIT DAD IM SORRY PLEASE...

baseball SUCKS: wow, he pulled out the big guns

Im better than you: Junko keeps hitting me with her purse when i get close

LoudDad: Good. Think about what you've done.

cryptid: thats a horrid punishmet taka...

think emoji: agreed

money: the shaking hands meme: mukuro, kirigiri, hating junko

tits: u all r mean ive done nothing to u

id fuck a motorcycle: Chihiro is crying, taka please.

weed: TAKA U MADE CHIHIRO CRY

LoudDad: Fine. His punishment is finished.

Im better than you: Mine too?

LoudDad: No.

think emoji: HADJHDD

LoudDad: Naughty faggots get the Junko corner.

lesbean: HKJAHKJHDSKJHDKADHkADJH

ultimate dissapointment: may I go to the junko corner then, I am also a naughty faggot. For mr. hopes sister~

think emoji: OH-

hope more like help: please. last night was hell. night time she goes over to your place, not here

money: OH NO

cryptid: im

tits: HAHAHAHAHA

ultimate dissapointment: Oh so you heard all that? Sorry you had to hear us smash

hope more like help: NEXT TIME DONT STEAL MY SWITCH TO PLAY SMASH YOU WHORE

best boy: oh.

famous bitch: welp

ultimate dissapointment: FOR THE RECORD, YOUR SISTER TOOK IT.

ultimate dissapointment: oh also you heard us have sex, sorry

hope more like help: HUH WHAT I THOUGHT THAT WAS THE GAME--

 

Chapter Text

sleeby: you guys ever thinng abt how komeada and hajime act like komaru's dads....

useless lesbian: holy shit

hongry: now that u mention it...

useless bi: She cute, she small, we adopt.

useless lesbian: can i call u dad

sad and gay: sure but only i can call him daddy

boss baby: OH MY GDO

Usless bi: STFU

sword mom: jfc..........

boys r gross: pls refer to my username

sleeby: my new fav photo

sleeby: the-naegis-terrorize-hajime.jpg

xxxSceneQueenxxx: HAJIME'S BLUSHING BUT HE ALSO LOOKS SO PISSED HJSH

ultimate lesbian: when hajime wont love u so u have to call in the big guns to cuddle him w you

sword mom: the big guns is just ur ball of sunshine brother

ultimate lesbian: ye

Usless Bi: REEE

sad and gay: how cute...

Usless Bi: shut up...you get no say in this

sad and gay: :(

Usless Bi: ily..

boysrgross: hajime be nice or i expose u for what u just called komeda

xxxscenequeenxxx: oh?

Usless Bi: I didn't say anything so go on and expose me!

boysrgross: "and then cumdump-- i mean komeada"

bossbaby: YOU WHAT

hongry: WELP

sleeby: gotta blast

usless bi: SHIT--I-I I NEVER SAID THAT!!

sad and gay: doubtful

usless bi: KOMEADA!

xxxscenequeenxxx: SJADHKJHSKDJ

uslesss bi: Komeada leave you door unlocked im coming over to kill you

sad and gay: okay :D

boysrgross: nastie

Usless Bi: DONT BE HAPPY ABOUT IT

ultimate lesbian: hey who wants to come play super smash w me

sleeby: you had me at super

baby shark: ooo! I do I do!

cermet kin: I can try!

xxxscenequeenxxx: ibuki would love to join!!

sir-shits-a-lot: ILL FUCKING DESTROY YOU!!!!

hongry: OH BET

sir-shits-a-lot: YOURE ON!!!

usless bi: Wait, didnt you steal that from your brother?

ultimate lesbian:...........................................................................yeah what are u gonna do abt it pussy boy

usless bi: nothing

izuwu: pussy

sleeby: HAJKJDH

usless bi: IZURU SHUT THE FUCK UP, GO BACK TO YOUR ROOM AND STAY THERE

izuwu: will do. pussy

usless bi: ILL DESTROY YOUR BLOODLINE

izuwu: that includes you, fucking idiot

usless bi: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

sad and gay: hajime come back to bed ;((((

boss baby: im?

baby shark: oh. so no bro time?

Usless Bi: No bro time, only hoe time

baby shark: aw..

boss baby: soda come over

baby shark: Okay cool!

swordmom: fuyuhiko fucks

hongry: FUYUHIKO FUCKS

princess: I thought that was quite obvious

boss baby: im atracted to idiots

swordmom: is that why we use to date

boss baby: yeah swordmom: thats fair

brat: are you really gonna fuck that pink haired gremlin?

boss baby: why not

baby shark: hey! ;;

ultimate lesbian: this is so fucking chaotic

brat:He smells, hes ugly, probably has a small penis

baby shark: WAAAAAAAAAA

boysrgross: HIOKYO...

boyrgross: what did i say abt thinking before you speak

Brat: I did! I thought he smells, thought hes ugly, and assumed he has a small penis!

boysrgross: baby.. did you think abt if it would hurt him

Brat: well....noo...but..

boysrgross: but?

Brat: But I was giving Fyuhiko reasons to not fuck him! The context was acceptable!

boysrgross: oh my god

Chapter Text

cryptid: hey while everyone is online i have smth to say....

think emoji: hm? 

money: whats up hon?

Loud Dad: ?!

cryptid: i uh

cryptid: im nonbinary

doNUT: Oh, cool!

lesbean: oh ok!

LoudDad: I assume u now use they/them?

cryptid: mhm

hope more like help: Oh awesome! Thanks for letting us know Mukuro!

think emoji: thank you for telling us mukuro

cryptid: yeah.. thanks for being so supportive..

id fuck a motorcycle: Sweet. We've collected the whole set

ultimate dissapointment: Thank you Mukuro, very cool

cryptid: wait wym whole set

lesbean: makoto n i are trans remeber?

cryptid: RIGHT

famous bitch: im the only straighty uwu

baseball SUCKS: no one gives a fuck you slut

famous bitch: i love u too :)

baseball SUCKS: Id tell you to suck my cunt but I dont want you anywhere near me, I dont want STDs

hope more like help: Cant we all just get along and support Mukuro for 5 seconds?

money: that is impossible makoto

doNUT: Leon I love you so much

best boy: leon and hina are such a chaotic duo......

im better than you: You all are going to make my hair turn grey

Ultimate dissapointment: old fart

Chapter Text

sleeby: komeada stop sending the perhaps cow to hajime and i challange


sad and gay: perhaps.png


ultimate lesbian: KJSKJA


useless bi: I think its funny


sleeby: i think ur a fag


baby shark: it is when used correctly


useless bi: IM BI ITS IN MY NAME

izuwu: faggot.


xxxSceneQueenxxx: HAJIME UR GAY?


boys r gross: HOW COME U NEVER TOLD US


useless bi: GUYS WHAT THE FUCK???

hongry: YOU BETRAYED MY TRUST HOW DARE U

sir-shits-alot: WE WELCOME YOU WITH OPEN ARMS HAJIME!

amster-fucker: Congrats.


boss baby: damn hajime you never struck me as a fag


swordmom: congrats on coming out


Princess: Oh how wonderful, another gay to the collection!


baby shark: miss sonina...w..what do you mean collection?


ultimate lesbian: SONIA HASKJHSAD

Useless bi: IM BISEXUAL


ultimate lesbian: sonia voice: hi! this is my army of fags -- i mean my class!


brat: HA! new you were a faggot the moment I saw you wearing skinny jeans Hajime. Stupid idiot. Only gross boys like other gross boys


cermet-kin: Congrats on coming out! I know it was hard but, we still love you!!


sad and gay: hey waddya know im gay too


sad and gay: come cuddle me


useless bi: CAN ANY OF YOU READ THE BI PART IN MY NAME??? But also omw


izuwu: faggot.


sleeby: you ever think abt all that izuru mostly says is fag and its always after hajime opens is mouth


izuwu: its my job.

Chapter Text

Usless bi: CHIAKI RAN INTO MY ROOM, SCREAMED "HAJIME!" AND WHEN I TURNED TO HERSHE THREW AN EMPTY WATER BOTTLE AT ME, MUTTERED "100 PTS." AND LEFT

swordmom: HDkjSHDJK

xxxSceneQueenxxx: CHIAKI....

baby shark: she got 100 pts dude

brat: yeah you stupid! 100 fucking pts!

useless bi: what does that have to do with anything?!?!

boys r gross: chiaki i love you more and more every day

sleeby: <3

cermert-kin: I have been attacked! I was her next victim!

baby shark: 200 pts

sleeby: im sorry mikan but it had to be done

cermet-kin: i-its okay, I understand

sir-shits-alot: I AM GAURDING AKANE, NO POINTS SHALL BE SCORED WITH HER TODAY UNLESS YOU WANNA GO THROUGH ME!

hongry: NEKOMARU AND I HAVE BOTH BEEN DEFEATED

hongry: SHE KEPT SOFTLY HITTING MUMBLING BONK REALLY SOFTLY TILL HE DIED OF CUTENESS THEN CHUCKED IT AT MY NOSE

sleeby: 400 pts

Useless bi: KOMAEDA JUST RAN OUT INTO THE HALLWAY SCREECHING "KILL ME NEXT"

ultimate lesbian: SHE HIT HIM SO HARD I HEARD HIM FALL

baby shark: 500 pts

brat:SCREEEECH I HEAR HER PITTER PATTER

boys r gross: BABY HIDE

brat: CHIAKI NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

baby shark: 600 pts

sleeby: thanks soda, you will be last for your assistance

baby shark: youre welcome, im honored.

xxxSceneQueenxxx: IBUKI IS DOWN

baby shark: 700 pts

ultimate lesbian: OH GOD OH FUCK OH SHIT

ultimate lesbian: SHES JUST SLOWLY PATTERING TOWARDS ME

ultimate lesbian: HSDJKHAKADUIHSDKJHSDKJHFDKLJHSF

baby shark: 800

boys r gross: SHE HIT MY FUCKING STOMACH

boys r gross: WHERE R ALL THESE WATER BOTTLES COMING FROM

hamster-fucker: MY FIVE DARK DEVAS WILL STOP THIS MADNESS

hamster-fucker: NO! SHE FED THEM AND THEY WERE DISTRACTED! NOOOOOOOOO

baby shark: 1000

boss baby: PEKO CUT THOUGH ONE AND SHE JUST PULLED OUT ANOTHER WHAT THE FUCK

useless bi: WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING

boss baby: FUCK PEKO NOOOOOO

baby shark: 1100

boss baby: THE LITTLE BITCH HIT MY EYEPATCH

sleeby: :)

baby shark: 1200

sleeby: sonia my love im so sorry but i need points

sleeby: ill never forget you

princess: she came in, throw it as gently as she could, kissed my cheek and then chucked a second one as hard as she could

baby shark: 1300

baby shark: AH FUCK IM NEXT!!! RUNN RUYNN

useless bi: I JUST SAW SODA RUN THROUGH THE HALL SCREAMING

brat: I heard a loud "SHIT" and tumbling down stairs

brat: so I look, and there he is

brat: chiaki threw the bottle at his head as she watched

baby shark: 1....1400....hh...

brat: Fuyuhiko come get your garbage off my lawn please

sleeby: one left.

ultimate lesbian: DO YOU ALL WANT A PLAY BY PLAY OF WHATS GOING ON

useless bi: Im sad to admit that yes, I do

ultimate lesbian: SO SHE FINDS IZURU

ultimate lesbian: PULLS OFF HER CUTE LITTLE BACKPACK

ultimate lesbian: AND STARTS THROWING ONE AFTER ANOTHER AT HIM

ultimate lesbian: HE LIKE DODGES THEM WITH EASE

ultimate lesbian: TILL SHE PULLS OUT A FULL WATER BOTTLE AND SAYS SWEETLY "hydrate or diedrate bitch" ultimate lesbian: HE STANDS THERE AND LET IT HIT HIM SQUARE IN THE FOREHEAD AND WATCHES IT AS IT FALLS TO THE FLOOR AND QUIETLY SAYS "1500"

ultimate lesbian: she then proceedes to bonk herself on the head and goes "16000"

baby shark: game over, Chiaki wins.

sleeby: i win!

 

Chapter Text

think emoji: i love my boyfriends goodbye

money: you put an s

think emoji: correct.

lesbean: oh?

hope more like help: Yeah! She has two!!!!! Me and our boyfriend!

doNUT: Wait who tf is yalls boyfriend makoto?

ultimate disappointment: who would ever do such a thing?

its weed: INVESTIGATION TIME!

LoudDad: Evidence so far is that it is indeed a male, so all we need is to ask every guy in the class.

cryptid: what is this some really bad game where a bunch of kids die?

Baseball SUCKS: Not me folks, Im to busy in orgys to actually have a relationship

famous bitch: WE GET IT LEON UR LONELY

Baseball SUCKS: Sayaka we all know you have more STDs than recorded by womens health

lesbean: FUCK

Id fuck a motorcycle: Not me, I'm very happy with my computer nerd

best boy: ^-^

Weeb: I only date women, 2D women

tits: no one asked

doNUT: Thats all the guys in class! Who the fuck is their boyfriend???

its weed: I GOT IT

its weed: THEYRE DATING A GHOST

doNUT: OMG

think emoji: jesus fuck

cyrptid: hiro no...

Hope more like help: What? guys no...

money: you all are so dumb

money: its obvious

LoudDad: IS HE A DIFFERENT YEAR THAN US?

think emoji: maybe maybe not

LoudDad: I UNDERSTAND. THEY ARE CUTE.

Hope more like help: Taka .....

best boy: that kuzuryu could get it tbh

its weed: CHIHIRO

best boy: WHAT I HAVE A TYPE

doNUT: Idk his swords woman is hotter to me

cryptid: shes really kind too..

Id fuck a motorcycle: That makes this search a lot harder, theres so many other dudes to choose from now! who are they dating?!!?

Weeb: Though I dont tend to stray from 2D women, both the princess and nurse are very... appealing

doNUT: Hifumi go back to your anime porn, the adults are talking

money: please leave sonia alone....................

tits: IF YOU TOUCH MIKAN I WILL HAVE MUKURO SKIN YOU ALIVE

Hope more like help: Junko holy shit wtf happened to you??

tits: shes my friend and im protective

cyrpid: she says friend but she means co-worker and their job is being popular

LoudDad: I DO RECALL SHE WAS AROUND YOU A L OT

doNUT: didnt you two fuck for a while?

tits: i tried but shes taken

Weeb: drats

Hope more like help: Should we just tell them babe?

doNUT: PLEASE

think emoji: i think its his thing to tell

think emoji: hes the one who wanted to take it slow

doNUT: WHOEVER YOU ARE MYSTERIOUS BOYFRIEND, I WILL FIND YOU!!!

lesbean: please calm down

LoudDad: Though I am one to have order, I will allow Hina and Yasuhiro investigate

its weed: I TOLD U ITS A GHOST

money: this is so fucking dumb tf

money: its so obvious

doNUT: YASU, LETS GO TO UR ROOM AND START THE INVESTIGATION

its weed: OK BUT IM TELLING U ITS A GHOST

doNUT: NO ITS NOT

best boy: but what if it is

 its weed: SEE

doNUT: wait...is it?

lesbean: please dont encorage him

doNUT: MEETING IN THE LIVING ROOM. RIGHT NOW!!!

id fuck a motorcycle: but the other year kids are down there...

doNUT: PERFECT

cryptid: oh no

Hope more like help: this is getting so out of hand...

money: COUGH strange how mr moneybags isnt on today COUGH

doNUT: Byakuya? Gross. why do you care Celeste?

cryptid: IM DONE I CANT

money: mukuro came into my room crying that their hair is graying look what youve done

 tits: haha sucker

doNUT: WAIT CELESTE DO YOU LIKE BYAKUYA???

money: IM???? A LESBIAN?????

famous bitch: im in hell

doNUT: oh right. Pussy rights

lesbean: baby please.........

doNUT: wait but why do you care about four-eyes Celeste? If youre into pussy, he doesnt have it though he acts like one

Hope more like help: Be nice!!!

cryptid: YOU ALL ARE SO DUMB IM MOVING TO THE OTHER CLASS

tits: hasta la vista 

doNUT: MUKURO HELP US IN THE SEARCH

cryptid: I WILL DO NO SUCH THING

doNUT: ILL LET YOU SLAP JUNKO

tits: they do that anyway

cryptid: then you stab me with your fucking long nails

think emoji: what the fuck is going on

doNUT: IM GOING TO FIND EVERY BOY AND ASK

doNUT: I HAVE TAKA, YASU AND HIFUMI IS SOMEHOW HERE

Weeb: I was in the mens bathroom and she grabbed me away ;;

think emoji: the other class is wild wtf

think emoji: so much is going on what the hell

think emoji: i apologise for the chaos i created

doNUT: THESE KIDS ARE TRASH AND WONT SPILL FOR SHIT, IVE MANAGED TO TAKE THE PINK ONE HOSTAGE

doNUT: I think I shoudve grabbed a different one, we havent even done anything and all he does is cry

best boy: me too buddy

LoudDad: I'm starting to regret allowing this

money: HM I WONDER WHERE BYAKUYA IS

doNUT: we've been other this celeste, no one cares!

doNUT: Well the cure swords woman just took him, and plopped Hajime in his place

 

[cryptid has left the chat]

 

tits: HAHAHAHHA

 

[Hope more like help has added cryptid to the chat]

 

cryptid: no

hope more like help: please

cryptid: fine just bc i love u

doNUT: IT WAS FOR NOTHING, SOME BIG ASS MAN CAME AND TOOK HAJIME TOO

lesbean: nekomaru is chill leave him alone
its weed: wheres toko?
think emoji: where did makoto go?

doNUT: his room probably

think emoji: im in his room.

hope more like help: Im ith my sister and Toko

famous bitch: sweet home alabama

Baseball SUCKS: Stfu I forgot you were alive until I smelled fish from down the hall bitch

money: HDJKHSD

lesbean: leon back at it again w the roats

baseball SUCKS: Id like to credit Hina for teaching me

doNUT: So proud :,))

hope more like help: oh shit. sorry other boyfriend, komaru told toko and so jill knows too

ultimate disappointment: bitches cant close their legs or their mouths - jill

think emoj: dammit komaru im coming over whos room r yall in

hope more like help: Komaru's

ultimate disappointment: HAHA HOLY SHIT, BYAKUYA?? YALL COULD DO BETTER HAHAHA!!! - jill

think emoji: JILL!

hope more like help: hhhhh....

doNUT: wait a minute....wait....WAI....WAIT A MINUTE

 money: THANK FUCKING GOD SOMEONE SAID IT

cyrptid: FOR FUCKS SAKE

doNUT: YALL ARE DATING FOUR EYES!?!?!!?

think emoji: how i fell for him i have no idea

think emoji: regretfully so

m better than you: happy now?

hope more like help: sorry baby ;;

doNUT: BABY!?!?!?

baseball SUCKS: huh. cool.

lesbean: holy shit

id fuck a motorcycle: wow, thats...woah

best boy: HIM??

its weed: WHAT THE FUCK

ultimate disappointment: I'm so sorry! Jill took over, I cant stop her...

im better than you: It cant be that surprising

doNUT: THIS IS A NIGHTMARE OF SOME KIND

lesbean: baby how abt we calm down and ill make cupcakes

doNUT: okay ;-;

im better than you: Yes. Kyoko, Makoto, and I are dating. We have been for roughly a month and have kept it a secret so we may go slow and test the waters. I would hope this doesnt change too much if you dont mind.

cryptid: congrats

its weed: yeah man now you have two more partners than i do

money: happy for u three
best boy: !!
lesbean: same here
tits: sure whatever

baseball SUCKS: whatever floats yalls boats man
weeb: Not 2D, dont care
doNUT: HIFUMI I WILL BURN YOUR PORN MAGS
id fuck a motorcycle: congrats you three

lesbean: HINA PLEASE
cryptid: i gotta blast, ill text later
tits: tf r u going smelly
cryptid: a date and if anyone asks who i will rip out your spine

doNUT: MUKURO YOU TOO!??!?
baseball SUCKS: aw here we go

cryptid: yeah if you can belive it
tits: no way

doNUT: pretty please tell us? :))))

cryptid: hina prepare your spine
its weed: OH NO
lesbean: please dont she needs that

doNUT: PLEASE IM NOT A BOY I DONT DESSERVE THIS
doNUT: PLEASE I JUST WANNA KNOWWWW

cryptid: ill pm u

Chapter Text

ultimate lesbian: soft lesbian noises

sleeby: oh worm?

boss baby: why do i hear yelling from class ]the other class's dorm?

ultimate lesbian: i dont even wanna know

useless bi: someones dating somebody and theyre trying to figure out who, is what I hear from the yelling

izuwu: faggot

baby shark: OHHH thats what all that stomping is about? gee wonder why theyre so worked up over whos in one another's pants

sword mom: mukuro is texting me. i can tell theyre distressed.

izuwu: Peko, where are they? Do you know?

sword mom: ?? they say theyre gonna come hang in the commons with me.. why?

izuwu: No reason.

hongry: strange

useless bi: WAIT WHY DOES HE CARE ABOUT SOMEONE OTHER THAN HIMSELF IM AFRAID

boys r gross: yeah me too

izuwu: none of your damned business. leave me alone faggot. (meant for Hajigay, not you Mahiru, youre cool.)

boys r gross: <3

izuwu :))

useless bi: WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK!?!?

sad and gay: HAJIGAY

useless bi: SOMEONE TELLME WHERE I CAN HIDE A SMALL BODY WITH A LOTTA HAIR

brat: up your ass

xxxSceneQueenxxx: DFGHJKLKJHGFDFGH

hamster-fucker: SOMEONE HELP, THE OTHER CLASS HAS COME INTO THE COMMON ROOM AND ARE DISTRESSING MY DEVAS

sir-shits-a-lot: YEAH AND THEYRE BANGING THE DAMN DOOR! IM TRYING TO-

princess: Shit?

sir-shits-a-lot:NO. fuck Akane.

useless bi: OH MY FUCKING GOD

sleeby: im just trying to game......................... they r so loud.....

boys r gross: welp

boss baby: why did the cute swimmer girl demand to know if i was dating naegi???????

baby shark: GUYS HELP THE SWIMMER CHICK IS TEARING AT ME

hongry: OH HINAS HERE :)))!!!

hongry: my mf baby

cermet-kin: I will ready the nurses office for any boys who have been injured!

boys r gross: finally.. the reckoning has come

xxxSceneQueenxxx: MAHIRU

izuwu: All i ask, is to kill me last. id like to watch hajime die.

useless bi: OKAY I HAVE MANY QUESTIONS

sword mom: IBUKI IS ON THE FLOOR HOWLING W LAUGHTER

usleless bi: WHY DID THE SWIMMER WALK UP TO MAHIRU, THEY BOTH FIST BUMP AND YELL PUSSY RIGHTS, LOOK AT ME, AND STARE

boys r gross: feminism

useless bi: AND WHY DID SHE THEN ASK IF I WAS DATING MAKOTO

usleless bi: AND LASTLY WHY IZURU

izuwu: faggot

sword mom: what the fuck

sword mom: did izuru just smile

sad and gay: WHAT

brat: she did it with me too. I like that one.

baby shark: WHY AM I SO AFRAID OF THIS SMALL WOMAN?? SHES MAKING ME SPILL WHERE EVERY GUY IS

brat: pussy rights

hongry: pussy rights

boys r gross: pussy rights

useless bi: THEY GOT SODA

boss baby: f

princess: oh. that sucks.

useless bi: HES MY BRO #NOHOMO

baby shark: HEEEEEEEEEEEEELP

boss baby: peko go save him

sword mom: ok

useless bi: peko what are you-

useless bi:HEEEELPPP

baby shark: BRONOOOOOOOOOOOO

sad and gay: f

sleeby: damn that kinda sucks anyway who wants to come play smash w me

useless bi: CHIAKI NOT YOU TOOOOOO

sleeby: sonia baby ill let you have the blue controller

princess: yes yes I'll be there!!

sleeby: ilysm......

baby shark: IM COMING BRO, I HAVE NEKOMARU WITH ME TOO!

sir-shits-a-lot: AHHHHHHHH!I I SHALL RETRIEVE HAJIME!!!!!

xxxSceneQueenxxx: where did komaru go......

boys r gross: eyes emoji
ultimate lesbian: im w my brother and my girlfriend leave me alone

useless bi: ive been saved! and I know what the swimmer wants!

useless bi: Someone is dating Makoto and Kyoko but they wont say who. All they know is that its a boy.

Baby shark: What makes them think its any of us?

Useless bi: Theyve checked every guy in their class

ultimate lesbian: it’s byakuya
ultimate lesbian: they’re just idiots

baby shark: That mean glasses dude?

ultimate lesbian: yeah the one my gf has the hots for

sad and gay: ohhhhhhhh byakuyaaaaaaa

useless bi: Should we like...tell them?

ultimate lesbian: makoto says he wants to take it slow thats why they havent told them

useless bi: ah. Wonder what they'll do then

ultimate lesbian: THEY FOUND OUT JILL CANT KEEP HER MOUTH SHUT

useless bi: all I hear is screaming

sleeby: im scared

useless bi: Ill come cuddle!

Princess:Im already here, you are not needed

sleeby: sorry haji no boys allowed

boys r gross: GIRLS NIGHT

boss baby: why dont we have a boys night then

sad and gay: omw

baby shark: HELL YEAH! GUYS NIGHT! GUYS NIGHt

izuwu: Ill uninvite myself from this festivity thank you

boss baby: what? have somthing better to do
izuwu: Yes, actually.

sword mom: ???

useless bi: No you dont you loner, you just wanna stay in your room

Izuwu: Actually im going on a date.

useless bi: W H A T?

xxxSceneQueenxx: WHATS WITH ALL THE DATING DRAMA TODAY

princess: Congratulations!

Baby shark: Whos the lucky girl izuru??

brat: for once I am genuinly curious

Izuwu: They're not a woman thank you, and its none of your business.

 

Chapter Text

[Hope More Like Help to Cryptid at 3:55 p.m]

 

Hope more like help: why do you not love me ;;;

cryptid: SHUT THE FUCK UP UR MY BEST FRIEND

Hope more like help: THEN WHY DOES EVERYONE KNOW YOUR SECRETS BUT MEEEEEE


cryptid: NO ONE ELSE KNOWS YET I WAS GONNA COME TO U FIRST


hope more like help: wait stop i love u


cryptid; U WHERE THE ONLY ONE NICE TO ME ALL OF LAST YEAR N UVE HELPED ME COME OUT OF MY SHELL SO MUCH OFC I WAS GONNA TELL U


Hope more like help: I PROMISE I WONT TELL ANYBODY, I DO IT IN ACCIDENT WHEN I GET TOO EXCITED


cryptid: its izuru


Hope more like help: HUHHHHHHHHHH


hope more like help: HES MYSTERY MAN??


cryptid: we have been dating for quite a while now


cryptid; it happened last summer


cryptid: junko was always dragging him around places and he agreed bc he found her interesting and when she wasn't looking we'd shit talk her and then it became more personal talks


cryptid: next thing i knew we where in my room and i was crying while confessing my darkest secrets to him, shit it took you forever to know


Hope more like help: Oh wow..


Hope more like help: I didn’t know if he was capable of having proper emotions, that’s good to know


cryptid: DJHSDJG


cryptid: yeah.,.,.,


cryptid; please tell no one


cryptid: especially junko n hajime


Hope more like help: course! Also why them?


cryptid: junko bc shes a cunt


cryptid: hajime bc hes and izuru have a pretty broken relationship


Hope more like help: Okay!

cryptid: i love you so much


Hope more like help: Love you!


[Cryptid to "Bad Ass Bitches" at 4:00 p.m]

 
cryptid: ........its izuru


sword mom: WAIT I CALLED IT


money: OK ME TOO


cryptid: YOU CANT TELL A SOUL HE WOULD KILL ME


sword mom: THATS WHY HE WAS SO WORRIED ABT U


cryptid: he was?


sword mom: yeah look sword mom: worried-izuru-screenshot.jpg


money: awwww


cryptid: damn..


cryptid: i have no idea how he fell for me tho, junko had me convinced i was unlovable


money: SHUT UP ILY SO MUCH


sword mom: ME TOO


cryptid: <3

 

[Cryptid to DoNUT at 4:03 p.m]

 

cryptid: its izuru DONT YOU DARE TELL A SOUL


doNUT: HOLY FLIPPING FLAPJACKS


doNUT: YOURE DATING THAT DUDE??? THE LONG HAIR DUDE LIKE HAJIME DUDE???


cryptid: YEAH HIM....


crytpid: WE BONDED OVER OUR HATE FOR MY SISTER


doNUT: Tbh I didnt know if that dude even had a soul


cryptid:honestly? still not sure


doNUT:: thats fair

Chapter Text

lesbean: hina, dramatically draped over my chest: so you think makoto and kyoko looked at each other one night and went, "hey lets three way with the devil me: hina hes one of ur closest friends hina: yes and?

think emoji: JDSHKJDS

Hope more like help: that’s how it happened yeah

it’s weed: SHKFAAKHDS

doNUT: CALLED IT BABE YOU OWE ME A DONUT AND A WHOLE LOT OF KISSES

lesbean: WE NEVER MADE A DEAL

doNUT: IT WAS IMPLIED SO YOU HAVE TO

lesbean: ?? OKAY??

I’m better than you: at least they said yes to having a three way with the devil. My one way wasn’t very pleasing.

Hope more like help: BABE N O

 

think emoji: jesus fuck

 

ultimate disappointment: who fucks who? Because I’d like to imagine Byakuya takes it up the ass

 

doNUT: good question because I am too curious but also disgusted

think emoji: no that’s makoto

 

money: CALLED IT

 

Hope more like help: HEY-LETS NOT—

 

best boy: yeah me too

 

I’d fuck a motorcycle: our ultimate hope is a bottom...I think just lost hope

 

it’s weed: JSJSH

 

LoudDad: ITS ALRIGHT MAKOTO. US TOPS WILL FILL IN THE HOPE YOU LACK.

 

Hope more like help: I DONT LACK HOPE AND THIS SHOULDNT MATTER

 

cryptid: do any of you sleep... it’s one am....

 

famous birch: TAKA MADE A SEX JOKE

 

it’s weed: WERE CORUPTING HIM

 

I’m better than you: I will admit, I wasn’t sure he was either. Then he submitted like a little bitch and it was very clear.

 

Hope more like help: KYOKO SAVE ME

 

think emoji: silence-bottom.png

Hope more like help: KYOKO!!!!

 

money: babe does this mean it a switch

 

think emoji: yeah

 

money: switch rights

 

I’m better than you: it’s very satisfying to watch, I can assure you. He gets very flustered with both Kyoko and I giving him attention.

 

Hope more like help: IM GONNA FUCKING EXPLODE

 

LoudDad; THATS WHAT THEY SAID. HAHA!

 

doNUT: TAKA NO!!!

 

it’s weed: TAKA NOOO

 

best boy: DAD WHAT GAVE THEY DONE TO U

 

LoudDad: IM HIP AND COOL NOW

best boy: DAD NO

 

I’d fuck a motorcycle: bro please...

 

tits: PLS SHUT UP IM TRYING TO GET MY BEAUTY SLEEP

 

LoudDad: YOU CANNOT STOP THE SWAG.

 

famous bitch: why.

 

doNUT: clearly Junko, you need more than just sleep for that face

lesbean; HINA ITS TO LATE FOR THIS

 

think emoji: makoto angel?

 

Hope more like help: yeah!

 

think emoji: you’re cute

 

Hope more like help: :DDD

tits: gag me

 

Weeb: CAN YOU ALL STOP?!! IM TRYING TO SLEEP!!

 

doNUT: no you’re not your having your 1am fap and the messages are clouding the anime tits. Go to bed you pervert

money: KSHSHSH

 

Ultimate disappointment: HAHA THAT ONES FUNNY, I LIKE HER - jill

 

doNUT: pussy rights

Ultimate disappointment: HELL YEAH!! PUSSY RIGHTS BITCHES! - jill

lesbean: we should sleep 

Baseball SUCKS: Sleep is for the weak, staying up is for the gays

cryptid: pls go to bed

 

doNUT: Yo Mukuro that photo you sent on snap is weird. Why is your pillow different?

 

doNUT: SHIT WAIT NVM IM SORRY FORGOT

doNUT: IM GOING TO BED GN

 

cryptid: HINA UR SO DUMB ILY

 

money: ?? WAIT—-

 

it’s weed: is this some girl code

 

cryptid: i’m nb

 

it’s weed: RIGHT IM SORRY

cryptid: u good

 

LoudDad: RESPECT PRONOUNS! THEY ARE VERY IMPORTANT!

 

it’s weed: IM SORRY IM R HIGH

 

Chapter Text

 

 

useless bi: I think I'm going to have a stroke by the time im 20

 

 

boss baby: thats sucks

 

 

Baby shark: it also sucks that for the 5th time this week I’ve accidentally bitten my hand while trying to eat a sandwich

 

 

 

 

hongry: How

 

 

Brat: he’s a fucking shark

ultimate lesbian: the cheese i had for lunch is coming back to haunt me

 

 

sword mom: komaru u good

 

ultimate lesbian: No

 

 

Cermet Kin: i May have something to help!

 

 

ultimate lesbian: pls

 

 

ultimate lesbian: WLW SOUND OFF

sleeby: here

boys r gross: here

xxxSceneQueenxxx: HERE!!

sword mom: here

princess: here!

brat: Here.

cermetkin: here!

 

 

ultimate lesbian: YOU ARE ALL VALID AND UR ATTRACTION TO WOMEN DOES NOT MAKE U GROSS OR PREDATORY IN ANY WAY. I LOVE YOU.

 

 

cermetkin: thank you Komaru.

ultimate lesbians: we will one day rule the world

boss baby: i like ur thinking kid

 

 

baby shark: FUYO NO--

 

 

boss baby: i will help the lesbians rule the world. gay rights.

 

 

baby shark: What about me? :((

 

 

boss baby: youll be the first man to go.

 

 

baby shark: thats fair... :((

 

 

hongry: f

 

Chapter Text

think emoji: i love..............byaukya........

money: gross

doNUT: NASTY

doNUT: I COULD PUT GLASSES ON A COCONUT AND IT WOULD HAVE MORE PERSONALITY

lesbean: i would love to point out that hina sat straight up, warmed her hands up, then typed faster than i have ever seen her before

Hope more like help: Thats to be expected...

Im better than you: I can't say shes wrong.

famous bitch: hina,,, arent u n togami close friends.......

doNUT: Oh yeah! He's like one my best buddies. Whats it to you STD factory?

its weed: HOLY SHIT

money: IM CRYING

baseball SUCKS: HINA I LOVE YOU SO MUCH

think emoji: hina hiro makoto byaukya and i: practically inseparable byaukya: breathes hina: Roasting Time.

loud dad: hina shaking hands with leon: hating sayaka

best boy: TAKA

its weed: TAKA MEMED

ultimate disappointment: Im so upset I almost missed this interaction

famous bitch: WHAT DID I DO TO ANY OF YOU

Hope more like help: Not me!!!

baseball SUCKS: Your coochie is so rank that the local fish market smells better sayaka. Thats what.

doNUT: That and you broke makoto's heart, and besides Chihiro, hes baby. You cant fucking do that. Whore.

think emoji: when we are all just the makoto protection squad

cryptid: no one hurts my best friend, thot

famous bitch: yall Bitter 

famous bitch: we dated for like 6 months in middle school

think emoji: he still rly cared for u 

ultimate disappointment: Hes my gfs brother and she loves him so Ill let Jill fuck you with her scissors.

lesbean: toko ur so cute...............

ultimate disappointment: Thank you, Queen Lesbian.

doNUT: IM KING LESBIAN!!!

id fuck a motorcycle: Youre a woman, isnt that the point?

doNUT: I. AM. KING!!!!

id fuck a motorcycle: Yes your majesty.

doNUT: >:)))

lesbean: my king, might i ask you for a dance?

doNUT: Of course my queen

best boy: thats so cute...............

money: im crying

hope more like help: I wanna dance with my gf and bf but I cant dance because I'm illiterate

think emoji: HDHASDJKHADSKLJD

im better than you: I feel in love the stupidest man here. how.

cryptid: makoto said dyslexia rights

id fuck a motorcycle: you love the smartest woman and stupidest man, yanno, for balance

its weed: equivalent exchange

 

 

Chapter Text

xxxscenequeenxxx: @izuwu hi


izuwu: Hello


xxxscenequeenxxx: :^D


izuwu: Was this all I was needed for


boys r gross: he speaks!


usless bi: Wow, didn't know it did that


sleeby: @izuwu ily :)


izuwu: ...


izuwu: <33


usless bi: WHAT THE FUCK


sleeby: !!


baby shark: My bro just got cucked..


boss baby: by his own brother too


princess: This is truly a shame


sleeby: guys i have a girlfriend


sleeby: SONIA IM UR GIRLFRIEND


princess: :0! Oh yes!


princess: Play mario kart with me. I want to be princess peach


sleeby: OMW


sir-shits-a-lot: WOMEN ARE BEAUTIFUL CREATURES THAT DESSERVE LOVE AND FOOD


sad and gay: boys r kinda cool.....

hongry: fuck off komeda


hamster-fucker: Both is even better


usless bi: Agreed


hongry: !!!


boss baby: @izuwu hey


izuwu: Hi.


princess: @izuwu !!!


princess: Hello!!


izuwu: hello sonia


baby shark: @IZUWU HEY HEY THERE :DDD


izuwu: Hello


usless bi: @izuwu sup


izuwu: Faggot


sleeby: FUCK


hongry: mission failed men


baby shark: DAMMIT


princess: :(((


Izuwu: What?


sleeby: we were trying to get u to ageing in conversation

baby shark: As long as someone loves me :,))


boss baby: ily


izuwu: Fools. It is neither.


sleeby; GASP


sleeby: A CLUE


sleeby: SONIA WRITE THAT DOWN


princess: YES OF COURSE!


ultimate lesbian: :333


boys r gross: Komaru What Do You Know.


ultimate lesbian: :333333


izuwu: Makoto told you didn't he?


ultimate lesbian: :333


sword mom: fucking makoto


baby shark: PEKO KNOWS TOO :((


hamster-fucker: I am intrigued


sir-shits-a-lot: I ONLY KNOW TWO THINGS! RESPECTING WOMEN AND SHITTING!


hongry: icon


izuwu: Id rather be engaged to my significant other


sleeby: SONIA


princess: ON IT ON IT


boys r gross: are you ever gonna tell us who this mystery person in


ultimate lesbian: :333 yeah izuru :33333


izuwu: No.


ultimate lesbian: :3333


xxxscenequeenxxx: :^(

baby shark: WHAT DOES KOMARU KNOW!?


ultimate lesbian: everything and nothing at the same time :3


sword mom: oh my god

Chapter Text

think emoji: im going out to buy waffles does anyone want anything

hope more like help: Hot chocolate please, its cold..

doNUT: read my name...also get Sakura some tea?

cryptid: hapiness

 

think emoji: mukuro i have like $20

im better than you: Lube

money: OH GOD

ultimate disappointment; Lube as well

think emoji: @hope more like help

hope more like help: AHH

im better than you: Hes crying and now I'm flaccid. Look what you've done.

im better than you: Cancel the lube

lesbean: HDSKjHSD

hope more like help: MY GIRLFRIEND IS NOT GONNA BUY YOU LUBE SO YOU CAN FUCK MY SISTER

think emoji: bet

its weed: KIRIGIRI NO--

im better than you: I guess tight pussy runs in the family

ultimate disappointment: I suppose so

best boy: OH MY GOD

id fuck a motorcycle: I'm suddenly suicidal and only because now I'm imagining Makoto's mother with a tight puss.

cryptid: BAD. BAd. BAD. BAd.

baseball SUCKS: She passed on the tight pussy gene

doNUT: "Aw look at them! So cute." "I bet they have your tight puss dear." "Oh stop it!"

lesbean: HINA

tits: the naegis might be tight. but are they pretty?

weeb: I've never been so turned off from women suddenly that I'm almsot gay

id fuck a motorcycle: Almsot

best boy:Almsot

its weed: Almsot

money: Almsot

hope more like help: Im gonna finally embrace despair because now I fully believe my mother's pussy was tight

doNUT: You did pop out of it Makoto

id fuck a motorcycle: And your dad came in it. Twice.

money: i cannot belive we are having this conversation

LoudDad: You're all grounded. Stop disrespecting tight puss like that

famous bitch: only twice?

baseball SUCKS: Sayaka you'd be lucky if a man came once

famous bitch: WELL DAMN OKAY

baseball SUCKS: You're the reverse uno card of sex. Instead of you faking it, it's now the men who do

tits: syaka and i are oppisites. i look and men cum. she looks and men go flaccid.

cryptid: shut the fuck up bitch

tits: uhm rude

cryptid: sry

doNUT: Junko you look like you cosplay a raggy slut who doesn't understand that highschool was 15 years ago and can't keep her vag wet so badly that mens cocks rub off if they go near you like medusa and her snakes are your pubes

tits: you know what. that was so good i cant refute it.

tits: mukuro kill her.

cryptid: nah

doNUT: YOU CANNOT KILL A QUEEN

money: all hail

ultimate disappointment: Im already dead inside

think emoji: i leave for ten minuets

think emoji: toko i got ur lube

im better than you: I'd like to request the lube again

ultimate disappointment: set it outside komaru's room

think emoji: and okay

money: TMI

lesbean: AOI JUST GAGGED

doNUT: DISCUSTANG

best boy: why are you all like this :(

Chapter Text

ultimate lesbian: who the hell taught my girlfriend pussy jokes

sad and gay: :3 ultimate lesbian: fix. it.

sad and gay: nah

brat: He can't fix anything, I mean LOOK at his mental state!

sad and gay: .................................yeah

boss baby: mood

cermit kin: pussy is nice..

xxxscenequeenxxx: why is it all we ever talk abt is pussy

useless bi: I just was trying to eat a fucking sandwich guys, can I not have a moment to myself of peace?

sleeby: no.

princess: Why ever would you think that Hajime?

baby shark: I'm literally your best friend dude, did you expect normal?

boys are gross: im the closest any of you have to normal.

usless bi: Yeah..

sword mom: i just passed fuyuhiko in the gardens talking to his sister, he looked me dead in the eyes and shoved her off the bench

boss baby: i was asserting my dominance

boss baby: none of you nerds get to know i actually love my sister

useless bi: Thats how siblings work, right?

izuwu: yes. hajime is the one being shoved.

useless bi: BITCH YOU HAVE A TWINK VOICE WORSE THAN MINE, ILL SHOW YOU DOMINANCE

izuwu: Boo

Useless bi: AHH

izuwu: Point proven

baby shark: Why did I actually hear him scream down the hall?

hongry: hajime i love you so much but youre a little bitch

useless bi: AW COME ON

izuwu: hah. faggot.

sad and gay: :( you scared him so bad he sat up and i hit my head

useless bi: My head fucking hurts now

izuwu: Is it because you're experiencing actual thought? Trust me it always hurts the first time

sleeby: W O W

baby shark: HAJIME FOUND DEAD IN MIAMI --

sad and gay: he layed down and mumbled "im giving into despair" look at what youve done

baby shark: BRO NO, DESPAIR ISNT RAD-

useless bi: well when you put it like that

hamster-fucker: This is the longest I've seen izuru talk and its to roast his own brother. I feel oddly satisfied

sleeby: izuru i love u please talk more

boys r gross: ^^ !!!!

princess: Boys have their own language. It's called stupid.

ultimate lesbian: UR SO RIGHT

izuwu: Too busy to talk, I'm actually going out

xxxscenequeenxxx: you're always busy!!! just chill and hang w us!!

boss baby: yeah we enjoy ur company dumbass

useless bi: Going out to shoot yourself because if so I'll join you

baby shark: BRO SUICIDE AINT RAD EITHER

useless bi: THEN WHAT IS FUCKING RAD SODA?

baby shark: Hanging with your bro..

princess: I wish I didn't have an education. Then I'd actually understand boys

hongry: LMAO

sir-shits-a-lot: I HAVE TO DISAGREE MISS SONIA! SOME BOYS CAN BE SMART! LIKE ME! I UNDERSTAND A HEALTHY DIET REGIMIN AND TAKE THE HEALTHIEST SHITS YOU'VE EVER SEEN!

princess: You're an exception Nekomaru

useless bi: HES the exception?!

hongry: of course have you seen him

baby shark: Women are hard man..

Princess: Especially when they see other women! Not boys, then they're flaccid.

boys r gross: sonia i love you more everyday. gay rights

princess: Indeed, gay rights

cermit-kin: Gay rights!

brat: PUSSY HELL YEAH

Chapter Text

money: im terrified

money: i saw mukuro walking to their dorm with starbucks, i asked them what they had, they said espresso so i said what else money: "thats it. its all espresso."

money: its a venti cup.

cryptid: i plan on chugging it all and not sleeping for two weeks

hope more like help: That is not healthy

cryptid: :3

tits: i hope it kills u

cryptid: same

ultimate disappointment: Anything with pussy I've learned is superb

think emoji: thanks toko

hope more like help: ID REALLY RATHER LIVE WITHOUT THIS INFORMATION

id fuck a motorcycle: Does....does this mean Mokoto's mother's pussy is...is good as well?

best boy: NOT AGAIN

im better than you: I suddenly am asexual and hate everything about genitals

think emoji: i love u

hope more like help: <333

doNUT: FUCKING NASTY

lesbean: baby i love u

doNUT: hell yeah. love you too babe

its weed: gay rights

weeb: These displays are more boring than a slice of life anime thats actually just a romance with angsty life problems like BILLS

famous bitch: shut up hifumi

doNUT: Hifumi if you don't take your weaboo shit out of my face I will scald you with your own boiling piss

best boy: thanks hina

weeb: How would you get my piss?

doNUT: Ive been in the boys bathroom, you can't aim for shit. Good thing you don't like real girls or you'd have an issue

money: OH MY GOD

weeb: THAT COULD ANYONE!

doNUT: Is your tic tac too small to hold and thats why aiming is so hard for you? No grip?

baseball SUCKS: Just give up dude, you're already dead

think emoji: what is wrong with you people

hope more like help: they are the reason despair looks so good to me anymore

tits: :^)

im better than you: Do not go near my boyfriend

tits: :^(

doNUT: HES MY EMOTIONAL SUPPORT MAKOTO DO NOT TAINT HIM YOU BITCH

cryptid: haha bitch

tits: mukuro i will destroy you

cryptid: please

hope more like help: Can't we all get along? :,,,(((

im better than you: he is crying now

think emoji: damnit

cryptid: hey if i mixed this w redbull do you think id see god

hope more like help: I have and he's weeping

think emoji: yes right after your organs shut down

doNUT: DO IT PUSSY

LoudDad: DO NOT DO THAT

doNUT: TAKA STFU THIS IS SCIENCE

tits: do it

cryptid: fuck you ill do what i want

its weed: ah, siblings

id fuck a motorcycle: One time my brother and I wrestled over who could ask out this girl and the looser had to drink motor oil. Lets just say oil tastes funny

best boy: MODO WHAT

id fuck a motorcycle: I thought we were sharing common sibling experiences

doNUT: WHAT IS FUCKING COMMON FOR YOU?

id fuck a motorcycle: oil

cryptid: once junko stabbed me with a screwdriver

tits: hahaha yeah

lesbean: WHAT

doNUT: IM ABSOLUTELY TERRIFIED 

doNUT: I HAVE NEVER DONE ANYTHING LIKE ANY OF THAT W MY BROTHER

hope more like help: One time Komaru stole all my t-shirts and tried to pretend to be me

ultimate disappointment: One time I fucked your sister Makoto

think emoji: you all have VERY different sibling experiences

Chapter Text

xxxSceneQueenxxx: hey @swordmom can u vibe check someone for me

swordmom: i have no idea what that means

useless bi: you failed Peko.

baby shark: PEKO NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

swordmom: ?????

princess: I am so sorry Peko. Your vibes have failed.

xxxSceneQueenxxx: all i wanted her to do was stab someone for me :(( and now shes gone :((

boss baby: she will live on in our memories forever

swordmom: IM RIGHT HERE?

sleeby: sometimes i still hear her voice

cermit kin: I can still see her!

brat: You fucking ruined it

boys r gross: hiyoko...

brat: NOT MY FAULT, ITS TRUE

hongry: omg...

hamster-fucker: What is happening today in this fuck shit place we call a groupchat

boss baby: hell as always

sir-shits-a-lot: IT IS A VERY GOOD CHAT TO COMMUNE WITH, PLUS I DO ENJOY THESE WEIRD NOT MAKING SENSE HA HA-S.

sleeby: nekomaru ur best boy

sad and gay: what am i...?

sleeby: rat

sad and gay :D

boss baby: soda just said hes on "meth and feta mine"

Baby shark: everything is worms

sword mom: What.

Baby shark: Fuyu’s haircut on a worm.

boys r gross: what

Useless bi: bro did you inhale too much fuel today..?

Brat: no but he may have inhaled “meth and feta mine”

xxxSceneQueenxxx: meth is for cowards! i only snort pure cocaine!

cermit-kin: that is not healthy!

xxxSceneQueenxxx: :3

Sir-shits-a-lot: IM SURE YOUR SHITS ARE VERY SHINY FROM THE WHITENESS IN THE COKE

xxxSceneQueenxxx: Thank you nekomaru!!

Hamster-fucker: my animals have very healthy diets that allow them proper digestion and good bowl movements

Sir-shits-a-lot: GOOD FOR THEM!!! KEEP IT UP GUNDAM!!

hongry: gundam ur baby

Hamster-fucker: Thank you.

ultimate lesbian: byakuya called me a crack addict to my FACE

sad and gay: SDAAJSDHSD

Baby shark: he’s very blunt

sleeby: hey hajime?

Useless bi: yes?

sleeby: u left komedas shirt u stole in my room

sad and gay: THATS WHERE IT WENT

Useless bi: SHIT GOTTA GO FAST

Baby shark: I just got ditched man..right in the middle of Mario kart

sleeby: i hope u lose

Princess: I hope you do moderate.

Baby shark: really?!

Princess: so you know your place :))

Baby shark: D :

boss baby: hasdkhasd

sleeby: KOMEDA HID UNDER MY BED SO WHEN HAJIME WENT TO GET THE SHIRT IT SCARED The FuCk OUT OF HIM

sleeby: ....theyre making out now

Chapter Text

cryptid: remember my theory abt not sleeping for two weeks?

money: MUKURO....

tits: how r not dead

cryptid; i wish i was

hope more like help: That is not safe

cryptid: shame

doNUT: Bro I wanna fuckn uhhhh eat till I die?

lesbean: HEY LETS NOT

doNUT: BABE PLEASE ITLL BE THE BEST WAY TO GO

lesbean: NO!!!

im better than you: I can agree, that would be a satisfying way to go

lesbean: STOP THAT!

baseball SUCKS: Hear me out. Dying by eating BUT, its those dick gummies

id fuck a motorcycle: The gelatin cocks shall be my death

money: why.

ultimate disappointment: I'll die drowning in pussy like a real woman.

think emoji: can any of you be normal for three seconds

hope more like help: I highly doubt it

best boy: :(

its weed: LOOK U MADE HIM SAD

think emoji: @hope more like help please stop muttering "im gonna eat worms"

Hope more like help: it’s a song!

think emoji BUT YOU JUSt KEEP SAYING ThE SAME PART

Hope more like help: I DUNNO THE RESTTT

I’m better than you: then look it up.

best boy: why did kazuichi just pm me asking me to photoshop his boyfriends hair on one of those fuzzy worm on a string

its weed: LMAO

doNUT: Theyre like us but somehow more openly crack addicts

money: good for them

money: if anyone in that class other than peko comes within a three foot radius of me i will stab them with my nails

cryptid: icon

LoudDad: if you guys were more openly anything it would be more openly gay

I’d fuck a motorcycle: TAKA?!

Weeb: I’m so taken aback that I broke my pencil

best boy: TAKA

doNUT: ah that sucks hifumi, did you mess up your anime tits then?

Weeb: well no but I— WAIT THAT IS NOT WHAT IM DRAWING

tits: are you sure abt that

Weeb: POSITIVE

its weed: UR PREGNANT?

think emoji: hiro WHAT

doNUT: oh my fucking god you piece of shit stoner HE HAS A PENIS

I’m better than you: You are all beyond help.

money: call me helpless harder daddy

Baseball SUCKS: this is where I come in ;))

doNUT: LEON WE UNDERSTAND YOURE VERY HORNY BUT JESUS THIS CHAT ISNT FOR YOUR DICK TO COME SLOBBING THROUGH THE MOMENT SOMEONE IS SEXUAL

lesbean: AOI CHILL FOR LIKE THREE SECONDS OH MY GOD

famous bitch: haha fuck u leon

Baseball SUCKS: no that’s fair

Baseball SUCKS: NOT WHEN ITS FROM THIS CHLAMYIDIA WHORE

doNUT: yeah fuck off you STD bitch only I can make fun of Leon for being a slut

famous bitch: :(

Hope more like help: I would defend you but your pussy looks like a moldy rug that someone threw in a swamp. Please get check at your doctors.

think emoji: MAKOTO NAEGI

famous bitch: i feel more attacked than i ever have

Chapter Text

sleeby: KOMEDA DIDNT TAKE HIS MEDS SO HAJIME FUCKING BODY SLAMMED HIM

boss baby: true love

Useless bi: some might classify this as abuse, but this is just how you get him to do things

sad and gay: some ppl might classify that as abuse but no. thats just how you get me to do things.

Baby shark: They both fucking—

sleeby: THEY SAID THE SAME THING

boys r gross: jesus christ

Princess: I urge you to please never do that again!! :DD

hongry: i hate everything abt this chat

xxxSceneQueenxxx: anyone: h- hajime: body slams them

boss baby: once in middle school my parents got in a fight that escalated so far i ended up getting shot in the arm

boss baby: fuckin mint

hongry: f,,,fuyu are you okay....

boss baby: dont ask me that shit acting like you and almost everyone else here hasnt had a tramatic childhood

boys r gross: OKAY CALL US OUT

xxxSceneQueenxxx: fuckin mint

sword mom: WHAT DID I JUST WITNESS

hongry: HDSAJKHASD

usless bi: I CANT BREATHE

baby shark: Yo whats going on??

hongry: HAJIME AND KOMEDA WHERE TALKING AND FUCKING CUM HAIR GOES "male rights babie" (AN OBVIOUS JOKE) AND MAHIRU, WITH NO HESITATION WALKS UP AND DECKS HIM SO HARD HE FALLS OFF HIS CHAIR

sword mom: never have i been so intimidated

usless bi: HE DIDNT EVEN MEAN TO SAY IT BUT REFUSED TO BACK DOWN-- IM CRYING

brat: HAHAHA HES BLEEDING!

ultimate lesbian: love the fact that mahiru is usually very kind and if someone pisses her off she uses words but OF COURSE KOMEDA MAKES HER SNAP

princess: I too snap daily when he is near. However this is something I have longed to do. Pussy rights.

boys r gross: is it bad i dont feel bad...

useless bi: A LITTLE BIT YEAH

sir-shits-a-lot: DID YOU DO YOUR LEFT HOOK? IF SO, HES DEAD!

boys r gross: .......maybe

sir-shits-a-lot: HAHA! THAT TRAINING ALL PAID OFF! GOOD JOB MAHIRU!

boys r gross: :D

hongry: THATS WHOLESOME

baby shark: I went to the common room to check out everything and he's just laying on the floor... I asked him what happened and all he could say was "I fucked up." Did you knock sense into him Mahiru?

boys r gross: DID I?

useless bi: Maybe he wont need meds anymore!

sad and gay: doubtful

useless bi: HE LIVES

sad and gay: sadly

brat: Sadly

boss baby: jesus fuck

cermit-kin: I-I am so sorry! I was with Ibuki, I shall arrive soon to check on you!

sad and gay: im fine

cermit-kin: Not without a proper check up!

xxxSceneQueenxxx: see! hes fine! come cuddle ibuki!

cermit-kin: It shall only take a moment! Please be paitent!

xxxSceneQueenxxx: D:

cermit-kin: He shall be okay! Just might need some ice on his nose.

brat: Ice for the freezer he shall be buried in..

useless bi: WHAT?

boys r gross: WHAT

hamster-fucker: I thought hell was hot?

boss baby: hiyoko i like ur style

hasmter-fucker: I am taking my leave early, if any of you need me I'm in my room. If I am not, check the freezer as Hyoko may have killed me.

brat: I suddenly have many freezers to buy. One for each man in the world.

brat: But ice. Is cold.

sleeby: i leave for an hour

ultimate lesbian: bad idea we need an adult

sleeby: why me

useless bi: I'm weak Chiaki. I can't handle them without becoming one of them

izuwu: Like a faggot.

sad and gay: HAJIME DONT LOOSE HOPE

izuwu: I am now reading though all of this. Mahiru, thank you for your service.

boys r gross: its an honor mr kamakura sir

useless bi: WTF GUYS

hongry: LOVE THAT IZURU SPEAKS ONLY TO PRAISE THE LESBIANS

sir-shits-a-lot: HE IS A MAN OF FINE QUALITY!

sad and gay: her punch to my face really inspired some hope huh...

izuwu: Ily Nekmaru

sir-shits-a-lot: :DDD

sword mom: take a shot every time komeda says the h word

boss baby: wed be dead

baby shark: Mikan come back I think the punch did more damage than the med can fix...

sad and gay: no im usually like this

xxxSceneQueenxxx: shes not allowed to leave soz

xxxSceneQueenxxx: we snugglin!!!

ultimate lesbian: aww

brat: PUSSY RIGHTS

baby shark: Is that your way of saying shes...."occupied?"

brat: Pussy. Rights. Soda.

baby shark: You scare me Hiyoko..

brat: I should. You're freezer number 3

baby shark: FUYU HEEEELPPP SHES GONNA FREEZE MEEEE

hongry: PLEASE DONT NAME ALL THE MEN FREEZER NUMBERS

boss baby: that sucks

boss baby: me next please

brat: If you wish. Freezer 4

sword mom: HEY NO

brat: Peko I have Mahiru and she decked the little shit named Cum. Do you really wanna go against me on this?

boss baby: hiyokos coming for my wig

boys r gross: guess im the new peko ?????

boys r gross: WAIT IF IM PEKO I GET TO KNOW IZURUS SECRET

izuwu: Its that I like pineapples.

hongry: hey yeah btw why would u tell specifically peko and komaru...

xxxSceneQueen: thanks izuru

izuwu: My partner specifically told them, I just said they could. No bias from me.

sleeby: THATS WHAT I WANNA KNOW TOO LIKE IF ANYTHING HED TELL ME BC HE LOVES ME'

sleeby: I NEED TO KNOW

ultimate lesbian: when izuru is the best boyfriend in the world

sad and gay: male rights?

izuwu: Thank you.

boys r gross: ill-fuckin-do-it-again-goofy.png

useless bi: BABE STOP PLEASE SHE'LL KILL YOU, JUST ADMIT THAT YOU DIDNT MEAN TO BUT ENJOY THIS CHAOS
boys r gross: but chaos is fun

sword mom: yall give me a headache

Chapter Text

cryptid: i wanna dog

cryptid: @hope more like help can we co-parent a dog

tit: what creature would willingly go near you

doNUT: Junko you're lucky any of US go near you

hope more like help: YESSS

cryptid: wait deadass?

money: MUKURO. MAKOTO. NO.

hope more like help: YEAH LETS DO IT

cryptid: also thank you lesbian king for defending me

doNUT: I AM THE LESBIAN KING

doNUT: WHERE IS MY QUEEN?

lesbean: i just saw mukuro grab makotos hand and run out of the doorm

doNUT: There she is, heart eyes

lesbean: i think theyre actually gonna get a dog

cryptid: :3

doNUT: Not the only bitch that'll be in the dorms... @famousbitch @tits

think emoji: oh dear god who let makoto go get a dog

tits: hey im a bitch and proud

im better than you: Who consented to letting makoto be MANIC?

best boy: doggy :DDDDD

id fuck a motorcycle: Baby no..

its weed: @Loud Dad

money: HIRO U SNITCH

LoudDad: MAKOTO NEAIGI YOU DID NOT JUST-

think emoji: sorry dad we tried to stop him

LoudDad; Bring the cutest thing I've ever seen in my life...

LoudDad: I LOVE HIM!! HE IS THE CLASS MASCOT NOW!!

best boy: :DDDDD doggy!!!!!!

id fuck a motorcycle: Oh here we go..

ultimate disappointment: Oh fucks sake I just wanna fuck makoto's sister in peace

hopemorelikehelp: his name is monodog hopes the third!

cryptid: mono for short

famous bitch: ew dog

doNUT: I WILL TAKE YOUR BITCH ASS PIG TAILS AND SHOVE THEM IN THE SINK DRAIN AND TURN ON THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL IF YOU EVER DISS MONO AGAIN YOU STANK BITCH

famous bitch: IM ALERGIC?

famous bitch: LEAVE ME ALONE

doNUT: DIE THEN

LoudDad: Children, please..

famous bitch: DAMN OKAY

tits: haha

hope more like help: Mukuro picked him up and said he looked like [REDACTED] and left

cryptid: hes mine now i love him

money: WAIT HE KINDA DOES --

tits: ?????

im better than you: He indeed does not slobber so he is sufficient, as well as fluffy

baseball SUCKS: I suddenly want all my baseballs back...just for fetch with this angel

cryptid: if any of u tell the headmaster ur moms a hoe

think emoji: bold of you to assume i talk to my father

hope more like help: HE CAN ALREADY SIT HE'S SUCH A GOOD BOY

Weeb: I am not one for these affections, however he does make me smile

cryptid: makoto look at our son hes baby

Im better than you: Shall we take shifts on who's room he sleeps in, who changes food, water, takes walks, ect.?

lesbean: ITS A BERNESE MOUNTIAN DOG

lesbean: STOP THATS MY DREAM DOG BC THEY GET ABNORMALLY LARGE (LIKE ME)

doNUT: My queen is happy. Therefore Mono is now approved by the lesbian King as well. I enjoy only one male and it is Mono.

money: im a cat person but even im in wuv

LoudDad: HE LICKED ME! HAHA, THIS IS A GOOD SIGN FROM OUR MASCOT MONO!

id fuck a motorcycle: All I heard Chihiro do was squeak softly and go "Doggy rights."

best boy: DONT EXPOSE ME STOP

doNUT: I can fully support Doggy Rights.

hope more like help: THE KING APPROVES, DOGGY RIGHTS!

cryptid: makoto he looks so much like him im so soft

tits: u dont know how to feel love

ultimate disappointment: I THINK DOGS SHOULD VOTE - jill

its weed: thank you griffin mcelroy

Im better than you: At first I was concerned about your political stance, then I realized, you are simply an idiot.

ultimate disappointment: FUCK YOU YOU TURNED US GAY -jill

Im better than you: As did you for me. Bitches. (except Kyo)

think emoji: im the exception?

think emoji: bad choice

hope more like help: ANNOUNCEMENT, MONO IS TIRED. I AM TAKING HIM TO BED ALONG WITH MY BOYFRIEND AND GIRLFRIEND. Mukuro you take shift in the morning.

LoudDad: GOODNIGHT MONO!

cryptid: gn

doNUT: Goodnight doggy rights

money: wait thats the first time ive seen mukuro smile --

Chapter Text

boss baby: i go to speak and soda cuts me off and says "lesbian rehab--sorry" and then just DIDNT SAY ANTHING ELSE?

xxxSceneQueenxxx: ?????

baby shark: SORRY

sword mom: soda? context?

baby shark: no...

boys r gross: ????????????

brat: He is now freezer number 1.

sad and gay: :(

sleeby: lets not forget the time hajime was complaining abt komeada not taking his meds and i asked if we where talking his lymphoma meds or mental ilnesses + dementia meds and he goes “im not worried about his lymphoma, that motherfuckers luck will keep him alive.”

boss baby: an icon

sad and gay: JSHSKDH

ultimate lesbian: WHAT THE FUCK

ultimate lesbian: CLASS 1 GOT A DOG?

xxxSceneQueenxxx: I WANNA DOGGY :(

sleeby: we should get a kitty :o!!

sleeby: @usless bi coparent a kitty w me!

hongry: CAT!!!!

useless bi: A cat? Well, sure. I've never had one before.

baby shark: I JUST WITNESSED A DEATH

useless bi: Ah hello Soda, what the fuck are you on about now?

sword mom: neither have i

boss baby: ^^ no pets in the yakuza

ultimate lesbian: thats so sad

baby shark: I DARED THE MONDO KID TO SEE WHO COULD CHANGE OIL THE FASTEST AND HE BROKE SHIT AND JUS DRANK THE OIL AS IT RAINED ON HIS FACE, HIS WHOLE CLASS IS LOOSING THEIR SHIT

brat: but did you win?

baby shark: YES BUT DOES THAT MATTER?

brat: Yes.

princess: Soda! :DDD

baby shark: yes miss sonia?

princess: shut the fuck up so we can get a kitty!

sleeby: BABY--

sad and gay: i had a dog once....

izuwu: I have a brother and he did indeed shit, piss, and cry, all the time. Still does.

useless bi: WHAT THE FUCK..

brat: Typical men...nasty.

sleeby: hajime and i are headed to the pet shelter!!! be back soon!!!

boys r gross: GL!!

sir-shits-a-lot: A DORM PET! HAHA! AMAZING! WE SHALL FEED IT PROPERLY AND I CAN MONITOR THE SHITS TO SEE IF IT DIGESTS WELL!

hongry: thank you nekomaru

brat: The one man who cares, I can be okay with this

boys r gross: one boy is good

sleeby: The Baby Has Been Aquired. off to buy supplies

sword mom: what breed?

sleeby: not sure, gundam will prolly know

sleepy: pretty-kitty.jpg

hamster-fucker: pure bred Tonkinese, a fine breed of cat but semi rare and commonly mistaken for Siamese

useless bi: Shes baby

sleeby: than you for ur wisdom

boss baby: its so cute holy SHIT

boss baby: peko if anything bad ever happens to her kill everyone in the class including me and urself.

sword mom: yes sir

princess: I adore her!

hongry: FUYU NO

baby shark: Respect the mans decision Akane, it is better this way

sleeby: hajime and i have landed on the name Usami!

xxxSceneQueenxxx: G A S P CAT!!!

useless bi: Shes so soft..

boys r gross: Bring Her.

sleeby: on our way home!

Chapter Text

sir-shits-a-lot: HAJIME IS A BOOMER!

sleeby: agreed

useless bi: FUCKING, WHAT?

izuwu: haha, boomer

hongry: nekomaru ur the one who eats bran....

princess: Hajime, what a surprise! Thank you for telling us!

useless bi: WHAT IS FUCKING HAPPENING?

hamster-fucker: What Year Where You Born, Boomer?

baby shark: I have a feeling that none of these people know what boomer really means and think youre telling us something (besides Gundam)

useless bi: GUYS I AM THE SAME AGE AS YOU!

sad and gay: i cant belive im dating a boomer

cermet-kin: Not even medicine can fix that

xxxSceneQueenxxx: thats a lotta damage

sir-shits-a-lot: I WAS TAUGHT NEW WORDS AND HAJIME WAS COMPARED TO A BOOMER!

boss baby: sorry buddy, all boomers must be executed on sight

boss baby: peko you know what to do

useless bi: IM A BISEXUAL SWITCH. I HAVE NEVER MADE A CHOICE THAT IS BOOMER APPROVED

sword mom: Understood. Goodbye boomer

ultimate lesbian: haha dads a boomer

baby shark: Hold up, he does have a point on that one

boys r gross: all men are boomers

sir-shits-a-lot: ITS CUZ WE ARE DYNOMITE! AND TNT GOES, BOOM! VERY CLEVER MAHIRU!

hongry: nekomaru youre so fucking dumb

hongry: kiss me

Princess: I would like to announce to all the women here, that one gets to stay.

boys r gross: one (1) good man

cermet-kin: But is plan KILL ALL MEN, still happening?

princess; Indeed!

baby shark: WE ARE RIGHT HERE??

brat: Shut up stupid boy, its girl talk you dont understand what were saying

ultimate lesbian: all we ever do is talk abt killing men

ultimate lesbian: iconic

brat: Theyre dumb and gross, they think we're typing in some other language

sword mom: Men bad. Eliminate. Pussy good.

boss baby: god i love you

sword mom: This is why I'll stow you in a small sack and keep you as the rest perish

Princess: Peko...

boss baby: heart eyes

sword mom: Sh. Let me have my emotional support fuzzball

useless bi: NO ONE CONCEREND?

brat: Shut up number 2

boys r gross: fuyuhiko: taken also fuyu: flirts with peko

boss baby: holds up peko: i just think shes neat

izuwu: I will happily kill as many men as it takes for hajime to realize that he's a dumb boy

brat: ANOTHER MEMEBER!

sleeby: HE SPEAKS !!!

xxxSceneQueenxxx: :DDD

useless bi: IZURU YOU FUCK!

izuwu: You don't have to point out that I get laid and you dont

useless bi: IM GONNA COMBUST

izuwu: into a sock

baby shark: He...he killed em dude....Hajime is dead

useless bi: NO IM NOT

hongry: GUYS UR MAKING CHIAKI SAD

hongry: BE NICE!!!

brat: ehm

brat: boys

brat: SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!

brat: thank you.

baby shark: Only because you scare me. the same way a wasp scares me, tiny and could kill me

boys r gross: hiokyo baby please calm down

izuwu: Hajime is outside my door screaming profanities. Childish.

Princess: I did not know his vocabulary expanded that far into curse words...

sleeby: ur upseting usami and me

useless bi: Fine...

Chapter Text

best boy: MONDO JUST CAME IN MY ROOM AND LOOKED AT ME FOR A MINUET AND WHEN I ASKED WHAT WAS WRONG HE GRUNTED OIL AND PASSED OUT ON THE FLOOR

best boy: @LoudDad HELP?

hope more like help: SOMEONE GET MIKAN!

LoudDad: Rest in peace my son.

vbest boy: TAKA PLEASE

LoudDad: F for Mondo

its weed: TAKA HDHJKASDHS

weeb: WHO TAUGHT HIM THIS?!

money: taka get help youre the adult here

Im better than you: I'm afraid it was the internet

LoudDad: MIKAN IS ON THE WAY!

ultimate disappointment: Komaru saw her run in the hall and so she just goes"Threesome time."

tits: she better fucking not

doNUT: Mikan can get it, and thats a fucking royal decree ladies.

cryptid: YALL SHE HAS A GF

doNUT: So do we??

tits: doesnt mean u cant admire from a far

doNUT: LESBIAN ORGY, I AS THE KING COMMAND WE ALL FORM OUR OWN PUSSY CHAT AND DISCUSS DATES AND TIME

lesbean: hina it cant be a pussy chat im TRANS

hope more like help: DOES NO ONE UNDERSTAND THAT MONDO IS PUKING OIL!?!?!

doNUT: Men can perish, sorry

think emoji: YOU REALLY CANT BE SERIOUS FOR THREE SECONDS?

best boy: :((((

ultimate disappointment: Back to REAL news, Hina, we indeed need the lesbian group chat for this specific purpose, of lesbianisim

money: yes yes pussy rights we understand. mondo is DYING

LoudDad: CHIHIRO, THIS MAY SOUND GROSS BUT YOUR BOYFRIEND HAS OIL LIKE BLOOD, THERE IS FUCKING OIL EVERYWHERE

best boy: THANKS TAKA I CAN SEE IT ALL OVER MY CARPET

its weed: what kinda oil

hope more like help: essential Hiro. FUCKING MOTOR OIL YOU ZUCINNI

cryptid: makoto you have to stop hanging around me

hope more like help: Its as mean as I can be....

LoudDad: THE PINK MACANIC HAS ARRIVED WITH NEWS! HE WAS DOING A BET WITH MONDO ON WHO COULD GIVE AN OIL CHANGE THE FASTEST, NEEDLESS TO SAY, MONDO DID NOT WIN!

think emoji: oh jesus christ

LoudDad: Pink machanic here, HE BROKE THE PIPE LINE AND JUST CHUGGED IT LIKE A MAN

money: chihiro is crying

money: im in hell. this is what hell feels like. you all are my personal hell.

tits: get use to it babey

hope more like help: HES OKAY EVERYONE! MIKAN MADE HIM THROW IT ALL UP, MONDO IS NO LONGER PART CAR!

best boy: MY CARPET....

lesbean: thank goodness

im better than you: It got on my new shoes. He shall no longer be safe.

hope more like help: PLEASE BABE HE JUST CAME BACK TO US-

id fuck a motorcycle: I lived bitch

Chapter Text

Baby shark: Dude I don’t get why Gundam has to show off his sexuality...

Princess: W-what?

Baby shark: Yeah! He’s the ultimate breeder.

hamster-fucker: I MAKE ANIMALS FUCK YOU DUMB HOMOSEXUAL

Useless bi: Soda...bruh......

hamster-fucker: IM ALSO ??? BI???

boss baby: souda jfc

Brat: HAHA THE DUMB BOY DIDNT EVEN REALIZE GUNDAM LIKES OTHER DUMB BOYS!!

Cermet kin: does this mean that Gundam is now attracted to Souda..?

hamster-fucker: souda is very much taken

boss baby: knife emoji

Princess: Polyamory exists but I’ll be here with my gamer girlfriend if any of you people want to eventually gain a brain cell

sleeby: sonia

sleeby: smooch

hamster-fucker: mikan we require your assistance

hamster-fucker: souda has hit himself twice on the same dresser

hamster-fucker: foolish

cermet-kin: Omw!!!

hamster-fucker: SOUDA ILL KILL YOU DONT YOU DARE

baby shark: MIKAN!!! GUNDAM HASNT TAKEN HIS MEDS!!

hamster-fucker: SHUT UP SHUT UP

cermet-kin: Gundam, this is unacceptable! You must keep yourself in good health!

hamster-fucker: MEDICINE IS POISON GOD MADE ME MENTALLY ILL TO HINDER MY ATTEMPTS IN KILLING HIM

cermet-kin: Oh dear, sounds like we need to up the dosage...

hamster-fucker: ME WANTING TO KILL GOD HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH BEING AUTISTIC

hamster-fucker: ...i also dont have a ride to refill my perception

useless bi: I'll go get it...I'm already out anyway

brat: on a date with stupid boy..

hamster-fucker: you shall be the only mortal spared

useless bi: Just in Walgreens?

hamster-fucker: correct

xxxSceneQueenxxx: Ibuki doesnt take meds, only meth

princess: I think the "meth" Mikan gives you is secretly medicine Ibuki...

cermet kin: Don't tell her!!!

xxxSceneQueenxxx: ....................................what

cermet-kin: I-Its for your ADHD dear! You wouldn't take it otherwise!

sword mom: For....for two years...she...had no idea...

xxxSceneQueenxxx: oh! ok! :D

Useless bi: I'm back, your meds is in the common room Gundam

hamster-fucker: many thanks

hamster-fucker: komeadas neck is almost entirley purple abort mission

sword mom: I still am in utter shock that Mikan somehow convinced Ibuki to take her medicine for 2 years, and thought it was METH

xxxSceneQueenxxx: you forget how dumb i am :D

hongry: what the hell

sir-shits-a-lot: JUST LIKE I FOOLED YOU ALL BY SAYING THOSE COOKIES I BAKED THIS MORNING WEREN'T FILLED WITH LAXITIVES HAHA!

useless bi: Nekomaru...WE ALL SHARED THOSE!?

boys r gross: NEKOMARU WHAT

hongry: BABY...........

sir-shits-a-lot: I NOTICED NO ONE HAD BEEN GOING TO THE BATHROOM REGULARLY, I MEANT TO HELP!

ultimate lesbian: i,

brat: NEKOMARU MY TINY BODY, HOW MUCH DID YOU FUCKING USE!?

boss baby: ^^!!!

sad and gay: YOU FORGET HOW SMALL OUR CLASSMATES OUR

sir-shits-a-lot: I NOW REALIZE I MAY HAVE OVER ESTIMATED, I DEEPLY APLOGIZE

useless bi: All the sudden half of our entire class has filled the dorms bathrooms..the cries from this war fill the halls...

Chapter Text

lesbean: who taught mono to wrestle

cryptid: ........

lesbean: of course

doNUT: Mukuro where have you been? Its cold outside my guy!

cryptid: w redacted

doNUT: Ohh! Stay safe, its cold out.

LoudDad: Be home by 12!

cryptid: maybe

cryptid: he’s telling his class

tits: TELL US NOW

hope more like help: He's telling his class? Dang. you two are pretty serious then!

cryptid: @all if i tell u promise not to freak?

tits: maybe

doNUT: We been knowing.

Hope more like help: Of course!!

Weeb: Don't care but continue.

Id fuck amotorcycle: Sure.

best boy: i promise :)

cryptid: it’s izuru. we’ve been dating since late summer

tits: I Z U R U

tits: MY IZURU?

tits: IM GONNA KILL YOU WHERE ARE U

cryptid: hiding

doNUT: Bitch clearly he wasnt yours if hes been dating someone else

think emoji: knew it.

it’s weed: WOAH THAT GUY

it’s weed: isn’t he kinda scary

Hope more like help: I won't let you hurt them! They're happy Junko and you need to accept your sibling for that! Stop trying to control them like you have since you two where kids!! Did you know I was the first person to be nice to them? THE VERY FIRST! Get off your high horse! Let them be happy or I'll ban you from the chat and I'll ban you from their life!

im better than you: Holy shit makoto...

Weeb: Oh my god thats the most serious thing ive heard here..

cryptid: MAKO IM CRYING ILY

doNUT: I stand with Makoto! Fuck off fake tits!

tits: fucking shit

tits: i need a nap

LoudDad: What is your decision Junko. We're waiting.

Id fuck a motorcycle: But know if you fuck with one of us, you've got all of us.

cryptid: guyssssssss

cryptid: it genuinely means so much to me that you all care for me. i’ve never had a support system like that

best boy: we love u!

Ultimate dissapointment: We really do. But also all of us have pent up stress and would fight a bitch instantly

cryptid: <3

Im better than you: Makoto is engulfed in rage. He says if anyone hurts Mukuro hes going to fight. Im afraid my baby is a gremlin

think emoji: i’ve never seen him so protective

doNUT: Makoto being angry is a sign the world is ending

it’s weed: i didn’t know he could get that way

id fuck a motorcycle: Me either, Mukuro must be real special

cryptid: heh

Chapter Text

boss baby: WELP

sleeby: ???

boss baby: we caught izuru w his partner

boys are gross: OH WOW

sleeby: BABY CAN I GUESS WHO IT IS

useless bi: What about my brother?

brat: WHATS THE TEA AND WHY DONT I KNOW

sleeby: SONIA IM PMING U MY GUESS

Izuwu: @all I know all of you are aware I am in a relationship. I'm finally admitting who it is.

Izuwu: It's Mukuro. I love them and I don't care if you all don't. We've been dating for a few months and it's serious. I thought you all should know.

sleeby: I KNEW IT!!

sleeby: IZURU MY LOVE WHY WOULD U HIDE RHAT FROM ME YALL R SO CUTE

sir-shits-a-lot: CONGRATULATIONS IZURU! I HOPE YOU TWO TAKE LONG AND HEALTHY SHITS FOREVER <33

useless bi: ...

izuwu: Hajime..?

useless bi: Congrats man.

boys r gross: hajime?

boss baby; u good?

useless bi: I'm okay. Turning off my phone for a bit.

izuwu: Oh no..

baby shark: Aw man, this means hes staying in his room too..

sleeby: you should talk to him zuru

Izuwu: soda, you have a spare key to his room right?

Baby shark: Yeah! Need it?

Izuwu: Yes please.

Chapter Text

hope more like help: Junko I'll ban you from existence

Im better than you: Holy fuck-

doNUT: GO MOKOTO HOLY SHIT!!

tits: WHAT DID I DO NOW

money: makoto gone rouge

baseball sucks: I know we all here (most of us I mean) have had a crush on Mokoto but who else can raise their hand proudly and say they're very horny for him atm

Im better than you: Always

Id fuck a motorcycle; Yup.

doNUT: I like women but yes

cryptid: for sure

its weed: .................yes

[lesbean changed the chat name to "you all are so horny, god bless"]

LoudDad; LET US ALL REJOIYCE IN HORNINESS FOR MOKOTO!

weeb: Not me

LoudDad: SHUT THE FUCK UP!

Id fuck a motorcycle: TAKA-

money: PLEASE STOP BEING HORNY FOR MAKOTO ON MAIN ILL KILL YOU

best boy: T A K A...........

hope more like help: No please be horny it helps my confidence

think emoji: makoto?

im better than you: What are you asking him about? People being horny for our boyfriend, what he said, or his existence?

think emoji: yeah

its weed: CAN WE GO BACK TO WHAT TAKA SAID

its weed: THE BITCH SNAPPED

money: mondo, chihiro and hiro all shaking hands: terrified when taka snaps

baseball sucks: Id say I'm horny for taka as well when we all know that im horny for everyone here but Sayaka, because even trash can have standards

famous bitch: I HAVENT BEEN ACTIVE ON HERE IN LIKE A WEEK GOD DAMN

Chapter Text

ultimate lesbian: FUCK SORRY I WAS BUSY CONTRATZ ON COMING OUT IZUZU

ultimate lesbian: r there any updated on hajime

ultimate lesbian: also @xxxSceneQueenxxx toko is terrified by the fact we'll just sit togeter when no one else is around and quote videos to each other

xxxSceneQueenxxx: HDJSHAKJHD

boys r gross: ...komaru are u limping

ultimate lesbian: :3333

baby shark: Havent heard from my bro all day :((

sleeby: me either

sad and gay: same

hongry: thats concerning

princess: Should someone go check on them?

brat: I call not it

hamster-fucker: I believe it is best to leave them alone

boss baby: they have a lotta issues to sort out

sir-shits-a-lot: I WONDER IF THEY TOOK A BROTHERLY SHIT AND JUST HAVENT FINISHED! EVERYONE HAS ISSUES !

xxxSceneQueenxx: nekomaru.....

sword mom: Maybe we should check, something could have gone wrong

sleeby: lets give them another hour or so, if they arent back we'll send in komeada and mukuro

brat: I ease dropped a bit last night

baby shark: HYOKO!!!

boys are gross: disappointed but not surprised

brat: It started p calm and boring but there did sound like some fighting, then silence, more calm, fight, calm, calm,calm, idk got bored and left

sleeby: wow, helpful

sad and gay: honestly i think we should send chiaki in

sleeby: ??

sad and gay: they both love u + ur a good mediator

sleeby: :D <3

sad and gay: <3

sword mom: I second that

Baby shark: Go Chaiki!!!

Princess: <3333

sleeby: if im not back in an hour send peko

sir-shits-a-lot: YOU GOT IT CLASS PRESIDENT!

sad and gay: @sleeby ur hours almost up

sleeby: IM SAFE DONT SEND THE SWORD LESBIAN

sword mom: Darn.

Useless bi: Hey guys

Baby shark: HAJIME!!!!!!!!!!!!!

sad and gay: baby!

boss baby: sup dude

xxxSceneQueenxxx: :DDDD

ultimate lesbian: hey daddy

brat: WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN YOU LITTLE SHIT YOU HAD ME-US, WORRIED!

princess: You scared her so bad she had feelings Hajime...

cermet-kin: W-Welcome back!

sir-shits-a-lot: BE LIKE ME AFTER EATING TACO BELL AND SPILL THE BEANS

hongry: nekomaru NO

izuwu: I will vomit.

boys r gross: hello izuru!

Princess: Please get to explaining you both! We were very concerned!

hamster fucker: nice to see you both back

Useless bi: Izuru and I had a very long talk about our feelings. From everything to the past as to now. We both recognize we did some pretty crappy stuff and ended up making things worse than they needed to be.

Izuwu: And we're going to try and be more open and brotherly to one another.

sleeby: im proud of you both

Izuwu: Don't worry, I'll still bully him

Brat: THANK FUCK, I thought I would be the only bitch in chat left

boys r gross: ;-;

Baby shark: Thats awesome you two, glad to see it

sword mom: As the classes honorary mother, I send my proudness in the form of this emoji <3

Izuwu: I've never felt more loved

Useless bi: HEART FUCKING EYES

boss baby; you got the peko heart. be proud or urselfs.

boss baby: soda be like repeats everything i say in a new york mob boss accent

baby shark: CUZ YOU'RE A MOB BOSS!

boss baby: I AINT THAT KINDA MOB BOSS

ultimate lesbian: ...hajime and izuru cant have three seconds of wholesome huh

sword mom: Can confirm that Fuyu used to talk like that from age 5-7 because he thought he would be cooler that way

baby shark: GET CALLED OUT FUYU

boss baby: PEKO ILL FIRE YOU

sword mom: No you wont, you love me

brat: In this chat its only the girls that last more than three seconds ;)))

cermet-kin: I HAVE FALLEN FROM EMBARRASSMENT-

brat: Of course you did

boss baby: fuck

boss baby: FINE ILL EXPOSE YOU FLIRTING W MY SISTER

sword mom: I'll kill you

xxxSceneQueenxxx: OH TEA?

sword mom: You're just upset that I'm gonna fuck your sister

baby shark: IM SUDDENLY SO AFRAID THIS RAW ENERGY COMING FROM PEKO SCARES ME

brat: Just like that raw fettuccine you ate because you thought it was chips

boss baby: WHEN SHE DOWNGRADES FROM U TO UR SISTER

boys r gross: **upgrade

boss baby: LISTEN HERE

sword mom: Sorry fuyu, but the only sword I'll ever deal with is my metal one

boss baby: WE USE TO DATE ????

useless bi: I'm killing myself tomorrow and I'm blaming you all

sad and gay: dont do that

sleeby: who else will body slam komeada

sword mom: Yes fuyu. We did. But I did not go lower than your belt. Because you were too short.

boss baby: WELL DAMN

Princess: Excuse my potty mouth but! WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON??

baby shark: HE LOOKED AT HIS PHONE AND SIGHED

hamster fucker: do not worry sonia. go back to playing with Jun-P, he enjoys it

boss baby: WHY IS IT BULLY THE YAKUZA NIGHT?

Princess: :0!! He's my favorite hold on!

Baby shark: Because you're and Italian mafia boss who let me eat his raw fettuccine and now I'm your devoted dumpster goblin

brat: Thats a wattpad fic

hongry: love how the kuzuyru clan could easily take us all down yet here we are, destroying fuyuhiko

boys r gross: DEVOTED DUMPSTER GOBLIN?

Chapter Text

We just wanted to thank you all so much for the love on this fic! It stared as a random little role play in our discord server and after a while we decided that some of the things we say were way to buck wild not to share with people. I really didn't expect this to get as much attention as it dude. I'm genuinely so thankful for all the comment (some of you are more funny than we could be) and kudos! It makes me happy knowing that our fuckery is getting even a chuckle out of someone else.

Chapter Text

lesbean: "hey hina why do you let toko roast you but rarley ever roast her back?" "oh! cause shes my bitch!"

lesbean: im

money: Lmao????

Ultimate disappointment: True

Hope more like help: ARENT YOU DATING MY SISTER?

Ultimate Disappointment: All is fair and love for that puss

I’m better than you: Sometimes I wish I handnt turned you gay

best boy: thanks toko very cool

Ultimate disappoint: SUCKS TO SUCK BY-COCK-U-YA

cryptid: U GO TOKO

I’d fuck a motorcycle: Not even Jill, it’s Toko

its weed: ...scary

LoudDad: Why is everyone taking after Hina all the sudden?

doNUT: You are all my bitches now

lesbean: hina youre my bitch

Weeb: But I have never once taken after you

doNUT: That’s because you’re not my bitch Hifumi, you’re just A bitch

doNUT: Don’t call me out our I’ll eat you out again @lesbean

lesbean: bet

Ultimate Disappointment: again is the best part of that sentence

Hope more like help: WHY IS EVERY WOMAN IN THIS CHAT SO HORNY

Baseball SUCKS: I feel like I’ve been left out and that really hurts me

doNUT: Yeah how dare you leave out the lesbians gay bitch Makoto!!

think emoji: im the only person here not horny on main

money: ^^

I’d fuck a motorcycle: No I don’t think I have. Chihiro I cannot day the same

best boy: ?

I’d fuck a motorcycle quoted: ”I just wanna get dicked down again.”

best boy: HEY

best boy: STOP I HAVE A REPUTATION

best boy: IM BABY!

its weed: :000

Hope more like help: I would like to personally get you all A FUCKING BIBLE

think emoji: they are beyond the point of help

I’m better than you: I’ve never seen such raw sexual energy in a text until I met Hina

cryptid: what is wrong with you all

Hope more like help: Where can I by bibles

Hope more like help: this isn’t google

best boy: i need like three please

best boy: on a completly unrealted note mondos tits are Huge and it makes me Gay

tits: hey it my job to have the big boobs

I’d fuck a motorcycle: Go my fan page Junko, I have bigger tits. My tits would crush your skull if you gave me the chance

doNUT: I dunno why but suddenly I wanna fuck ONE man and that is Mondo for saying that

best boy: F A N P A G E?

hope more like help: We all have one, the students who go to hopes peak get one

cryptid: deadass?

tits: no way u have one