BUCK-TICK’s latest two-day concert, Locus Solus, was completed without a hitch. All of the members put forth their best effort, the staffs worked hard to bring their dreams to life, and the fans eagerly cheered them on. The second day was the most exciting for everyone involved, with the Day In Question 2019 dates being annouced at the very end. Backstage was buzzing with comments as fans cheered at the announcement, so loud that the members could hear it back in their dressing rooms.
The five members had taken some time to get out of their stage outfits, before meeting back in an empty room to see their manager. Fans had been gracious with them, with each gift box overflowing with gifts. Security had already gone through them all checking for hazardous materials, so they were free to take them. Atsushi, Imai, Hide, and Toll all had other plans for the evening, so they asked the staff to just hold their gifts at the company building until they came to get them. For some reason, this concert had taken all of Yutaka’s energy, so he was the only one to take his box, as well as being the only one to sit out on the celebratory drinking party.
There were other formalities to take care of before they all split off to their plans for the night, but it felt like forever until the bassist was finally on the road back home. His body ached from two days of performing, but he’s endured worse when he was younger. The venue was far from where he lived too, but the drive gave him enough time to decompress. It was oddly serene at that time of night too, and the roads towards Tokyo weren’t as crowded as they usually were.
Most of Yutaka’s gifts were fairly normal. Some books, with notes attached about how much he would like them, wine, flowers, fan letters, all the usual things. There was one gift that stood out, literally. The others were all elaborately decorated gift bags, some cute ones with Rilakkuma on them, others donning expensive brand names- yet this one was just a simple black bag. The only things inside was a three jewel case discs and a small note. Yutaka took the most interest in those, so he read the note before even checking what the disks were.
“Dear Higuchi Yutaka of BUCK-TICK,
This parcel is ONLY FOR YOU. It was hard trying to find something to give you, and since you’ve worked so hard for us on Locus Solus, I decided to gift you these CDs. I read online that sounds like these help you fall asleep. Hopefully these will work for you and give you lots of nice dreams! Though, the only caveat is that the discs must be used frequently (preferably every night) and in the correct order in order to work properly. Please note. I numbered the discs, so i took the guess work out for you hehe. I hope you enjoy my gift a lot! I love you.”
The note was cute, and the gift fit well with what he was feeling that night. When he took out the CDs, they were in fact numbered. He didn’t feel like listening to his CD player, so he pulls up his laptop and imports them to his iTunes, taking care to number the CDs appropriately. He plugs his phone in to sync with the new files as he gets ready for bed, and they’re all imported by the time he comes back. Since the files are all separated, Yutaka throws all of the tracks in order into a playlist. He has to use this thing every night anyway, so why not make things easy for himself?
His bed feels wonderful when he finally lays down, and it feels even better to just put on his headphones and allow the playlist to go on. Just like the fans said, he worked hard. He deserves this. The first few minutes of the first track is absolutely calming. The sounds aren’t anything Yutaka can place, but they make him drift asleep quickly. Once he’s asleep though, that’s when a voice comes onto the track. Low and almost growling in his ear. A man’s voice.
Every time i say the phrase “good girl” its like cranking up the volume dial of happiness. relaxation, and acceptance. The more you experience it the better it feels. You want more of this feeling.
There’s more of those sounds in between, keeping Yutaka asleep as the man speaks to him. The man goes on, telling Yutaka about his expectations, how his memories taint his expectations. How the only way to crank up the dial of happiness, the only way to be a good girl, is to abadon his memories. All of his memories from age 0 to 10, get put in a bubble. The bubble is popped, those memories no longer clog up his mind. Yutaka is a good girl because he abandoned those memories. His memories from age 10 to 20, put in a bubble and once again popped. Yutaka’s a good girl from abandoning those memories. The man is kind enough to exempt a few, allowing him to retain his memories of how to play bass. Yutaka is a very good girl for being useful to his members. Again and again, more and more of his memories are put in a bubble and popped.
The harder you try to remember, the more blank, foggy, open, and accepting you feel. All the things holding you back, all your education and schooling, all into the bubble and popped. Good girl, no longer smart. All your inhibitions are put into the bubble and popped, good girl. All your intelligence is put into a bubble and popped.
For Yutaka though, it hurts. He always tried his hardest in school, but for nothing. Put in the bubble and popped, all of his hard work. The only thing he’s allowed to keep is his musician ship. More and more of himself is put in the bubble and popped. It’s okay though, he’s becoming happier. All the pain and struggle of his past, that has tormented him for years, they’re gone now. He’s a good girl, he doesn’t need those memories either.
You must relax more to feel better. Relaxing to their voice makes you feel like a good girl. You accept what i say more and more with every breath you take, and feel more and more like a good girl letting everything i say echo in your mind over and over. You need to be what i tell you to be. You chose to listen to this so you must have wanted this to happen. You don’t just accept in trance, you accept during your waking consciousness as well, even though you may not necessarily remember what you accepted in trance.
All night the man tells him more and more, christening him with the new name Bambi. Bambi is an accepting fuckdoll that obeys whatever Bambi is told. Bambi feels pleasure whenever she’s told a command. Bambi likes being useful, Bambi lives to serve. Yutaka’s old self is put in a bubble, all except his old self’s only useful quality, all put into a bubble and popped. Bambi can play bass because Bambi likes being useful to her members. Bambi wants to make her members happy.
On and on the files go, planting ideas into his head. Erasing his old self, molding him into a perfect new bimbo names Bambi. Bambi the bitch with a trashy, fuck slut personality. Bambi has a low IQ, in control of the man on the tape. Bambi will do whatever the man says. Bambi does whatever men tell her to. Bambi likes to dress in slutty clothes that invite all the men that see her to fuck her. Bambi craves to look her best. Bambi will have panic attacks until she can look her best. Bambi is weak, unable to resist what men want to do to her. Bambi is a good bitch that wants cock all the time. Bambi has trouble speaking, because the only thing her mouth is good for is sucking cock. Bambi is a perfect complaint fuckpuppet.
Bambi is Yutaka.
Yutaka is Bambi.
By the time Yutaka wakes up, Bambi and him are one. Yutaka is just as much of a stupid bitch as bambi is. Yutaka is only useful when he letting men have their way with him and when he’s playing bass. He’s only useful for serving others. Yutaka is a dumb slut that calls the number the man on the tape tells him too. Yutaka is a good girl that rattles off his address to the man on the other line, the man that controls him.
Yutaka is a good girl that opens the door when the man knocks. Yutaka is a good girl that lets the man fuck him with no lube, because Yutaka is a sloppy wet slut. Because Yutaka is Bambi. Bambi is Yutaka.
Yutaka lets his master invite other guys over. The other guys are nice to him, they call him Bambi and take their turns with him. The other guys cum on his face and take his photo, and Yutaka is a good girl that likes looking nice, so he poses for their photos. They laugh at him and call him a stupid whore, and the only thing Yutaka can do is smile and laugh. They don’t like that, because a man’s cock is shoved in his mouth. It’s okay though. Yutaka likes being useful.
Yutaka exists to please, so he allows his master to invite lots of other guys. Lots of them show up to his place to use him, and at some point it seems to be just fans coming for him. They wear BUCK-TICK merchandise, and they moan about how they never thought they’d have this opportunity. The days run together, because all he exists for now is pleasuring men his master invites over and listening to his reinforcement tapes as he sleeps.
Eventually though, he has to do something other than be on his knees, he has to reherse with the members for their annual tour; Day In Question 2019. His master doesn’t trust him with complex tasks anymore, so he’s driven to the rehersal space. He’s not supposed to do smart things like driving. Knowledge like that just clogs up Yutaka’s brain, his time it much better spent thinking of the next time he’ll get fucked. It’s hard to interact with the members in their casual conversations, but he tries really, really hard! Yutaka tries to make all of his parts perfect when they rehearse.
At the end though, the members stand around and talk. All Yutaka can do is stand there with his blank expression, awaiting his next command. Eventually though, his mind does wander. He’s seen Hide’s cock many times in the past, and Yutaka would love to suck him off. Oh and Maimai and Atsushi, they’d probably love to use Yutaka too! All they have to do is say the word… and Yutaka is on his knees, pleasuring them.
All he’s good for, pleasuring men and playing bass.