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Don't Touch My Alpha

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I hadn't known that my summer would have been like that, and by that, I meant babysitting my neighbor's son for the whole summer while they are off to work all day. They said they would pay me good money and I needed it to save up for school anyways. I wanted to be a writer one day and the school I want to attend was expensive.

It wouldn't be such a bad summer job if I had not been told horror stories of this kid since he was born. I never spent much time with him, but I have seen him around during the few times I was forced to attend dinner with his family. My mom and his were good friends in college, and now as neighbors, we spent quite a bit of time together.

When Mitsuki Bakugou asked my mom if I could watch her son over the summer, she went ahead and signed me up for it. I was shocked, to say the least. But I don't go against what my mother says, so I agreed to the job.

When Mitsuki told me the details, it didn't bother me much at all. It was a sweet set up, honestly. I got to stay at their house from 8am to 5pm, Monday through Friday. I would even get paid double on weekends if they wanted a date night and needed someone to watch the devil child.

They had an amazing house with a pool. The inside of the house was covered with modern decorations and technology. They had flat-screen TVs in almost every room, including the bathroom. I would be allowed to do whatever I wanted to as long ad I kept their son from getting into trouble.

Katsuki was his name. He was a cute kid, blond spiky hair and ruby-red eyes. He had a big smile and loved superheroes. That was all I knew about him from the little time we spent together before this job. I never saw him much. He was an infant when I was a toddler, so I don't remember him much. The older we both got, the less we all hung out together.

I was worried about other things as well. It wasn't the fact that I had never taken care of a child before. No. It was the daunting realization that Katsuki wasn't just any child. He was an Alpha. His genes were top of the top. Alphas were pushy, dominant, and rather abrasive people. Society knew them as our CEO's and businessmen and women. Although female Alphas were rarer than the males.

Katsuki's sub-gender was only part of the problem. The other problem was me. I was born an Omega. A male Omega to be specific. Omegas weren't treated badly nowadays. Nonetheless, it was difficult to be a male Omega in today's society.

People kind of thought I was weak. I was weak, but it still was never nice hearing it so much. I was weaker than the other sub-genders. It's how our biology forced us to be. Omegas were meant to be the submissive partner to some strong Alpha mate. It was almost impossible for an Alpha not to have an Omega as a mate. It made the best pairing. They balanced each other out.

In today's society, wolf shifters have evolved. Humans no longer can shift into our secondary forms -- our wolves. But we still possessed many traits of our ancestors. Our biology was still ruled by our sub-genders as well as hormones. Our bodies still claim and mark people as pack members and we still produce pheromones based on our sub-gender. Alpha, Beta, or Omega.

Some parts of our bodies were still wolf-like. Our teeth were stronger than the average human and our canines still extend when threatened. Alphas and Omega have scent glands that, to this day, still bless us with thick scents to both attract and deter others when needed.

There was just no need for shifting anymore with how advanced society was. Our bodies seemed to have adapted to this new way of living and there hasn't been a wolf shift in over 60 years.

Our human forms have yet to lose our heightened senses or animalistic tendencies. It seems all we have lost was our ability to shift into our wolves. We lost the ability to speak with our wolf side as well as communicate through pack links. The need to mind link other members of our packs seemed to fade alongside our wolf forms. To the elders, it was a huge loss when people stopped shifting, but newer generations couldn't miss what we never had or knew.

I had been worried about spending so much time with a young Alpha male ever since my mother told me I was doing this job. I have heard stories about just how pushy and hot-headed this kid was from his parents as well as my mother. They warned me about his outbursts and anger issues. All common things for Alphas his age, but it still worried me.

I was a pushover; I didn't like conflict or handle authority well. I never hated being an Omega and, as the moon goddess would have it, I was good with kids. Or so my mother said I would be. It was in my nature to be a caregiver of sorts. Even though I was male, I was blessed with the ability to produce and carry children. However, I never spent much time dwelling on that. I was only 14 and couldn't care less about mates or children.

I was nothing like a pushover even if I had issues with authority. It was an unfortunate trait us Omegas were born with. Any dominant Alpha could roll us over with a powerful command or pheromones. However, I was told this kid would run all over me if I was not careful. Even at 9 years old, Katsuki was still an Alpha and could easily overpower me if I wasn't careful. I wasn't worried about now though. He wasn't even old enough to produce his Alpha pheromones.

As the school year ended for the summer vacation, and I had finished my first year of high school at 14 years old, my 15th birthday approaching and I began my transition from student to 'summer babysitter'. I was prepared for some tension, but the first day on the job was extremely awkward.

I was currently standing in front of 9-year-old Katsuki Bakugou, who was glaring at me like I just killed his kitten.

He was looking up at me with wide angry eyes that made me swallow nervously and try and pull myself together before this kid ruined me. His spiky hair was all over the place from running around outside before I arrived. While he glared at me, his parents gave me the final run-down of where everything was and even gave me their phone numbers before quickly rushing off to work. Leaving me alone with the little tyrant.

"It's nice seeing you again, Katsuki. Do you remember me?" Squatting down to his level, I asked carefully while approaching with delicacy in case he snapped at me. He looked like a biter. However, the boy just rolled his eyes at me and my jaw fell. My mouth popped open. Did this kid just roll his eyes at me?

"I remember you; you seem like a nerd." The young blond said with a straight face and left me speechless. That all happened in just the morning. That day Katsuki gave me a run for my money and as day one of playing babysitter ended, I was left discouraged and feeling like I might not be cut out for this. However, I didn't give up on things easily.

Katsuki had managed to tear up the house, disrespect me on several occasions, and sneak into the ice cream before lunch, saying that he could do whatever he wanted because he was almost as tall at me. I was left to clean the whole house from his mess, force him to eat real food, and learn where I can hide the ice cream higher up so he couldn't reach it.

After a few days, I noticed that Katsuki had taken to calling me a 'nerd' whenever he could get the chance. I tried to correct him and tell him that it was not polite to call people names. That only made him want to call me a 'nerd' even more. So, I gave up on the scolding and just ignored it.

He didn't like that either and came up with other names.

He called me 'broccoli-head' one day leaving me both confused and irritated, yet slightly amused at his colorful language. I learned quickly that Katsuki ruled the house and demanded attention as well as respect. If ignored he would lash out.

As the weeks went by, things got a little better. Katsuki stopped tearing through the house daily and making such crazy messes. He still was reckless and I had to watch his every step because he was prone to breaking things or being too rough.

He even started calling me 'Deku' a few times. It was better than 'nerd' or 'broccoli-head' so I let it slide. I didn't even know what Deku meant until he explained it. Then I wish I never let him call me that. He said it was slang for 'Useless' and I almost choked. I knew he didn't have much of a filter; but useless? I wasn't useless.

However, 'Deku' sounded a bit nicer than 'nerd' and was better than the other options, so I let him continue. He wouldn't stop if I had asked anyway. I never told him to call me by my first name as I figured there needed to be some respect there since I was his superior, weirdly enough. Not that he would ever call me 'Izuku'. He seemed to like 'Deku'.

Our first summer together started to come to an end and I had become quite fond of the kid. Much to my horror, he was sharp and was easy to talk to. He seemed to like the time we spent together. On my 15th birthday, we watched movies together and he even made me a card.

However, Katsuki was also a jerk. He was sassy and had a big mouth. He was a pureblooded Alpha tyrant. For a 9-year-old, his vocabulary was quite impressive and colorful. He was also more mature than I had thought him to be.

I learned a lot about Katsuki over those three months. Although, he didn't open up to me much. He only told me things that came up naturally in conversation. I learned about his favorite superheroes, and that he feared the dark. Katsuki didn't like how I found that out. There had been a bad storm that knocked the electricity out and he had screamed for me to find a light.

I learned that thunderstorms made him happy, but only when they don't cause a power outage. However, they scared the crap out of me, much to his amusement. The Alpha liked mint chocolate chip ice cream the best and running made him relax when he was having a rough day or when he was angry.

To me, that was typically knowledge of Alpha biology. To Katsuki, it was probably all new. Most Alphas needed physical activity to keep their system in check. They were strong and had a lot of energy. His best friend was a kid from his school named Kirishima. He was a beta, and for some reason, he got along with Katsuki the best; even with his attitude issues.

I wondered what kind of special idiot it took to be Katsuki's best friend when the Alpha was such a little monster?

I managed to make a lot of money that first summer and put it all away into savings for college. Katsuki managed to weave a soft spot in my heart as well. Much to my surprise, I was upset when summer vacation was ending. He could be quite a sweet kid when he wanted to be.

On rare occasions, we would be sitting on the couch watching movies and he would slump over against me. Little bored huffs would spurt past his lips but I learned he liked the contact. Katsuki was alone most of the time with his parent's work life and he never had anyone home with him. Until I came around. Now he had attached himself to me in ways that I hadn't expected. The boy loved having company, even if he had a weird way of showing it.

I never told him that I was an omega either. We had spent the entire three months of summer vacation together and I never divulged that information. The real reason I never brought it up was that I didn't want him to pick on me for that as well. Katsuki was the type that would rip you apart over any small thing he could get a hold of. I tried not to take it personally at first; but as the months passed, I began to just not care. Katsuki didn't mean any real hard with his actions and words. He was just a little misguided.

However, he was a jerk that tried to boss me around way too much. He was nice sometimes. Even after the three months of summer he still picked on me. But it was never to the point where it really bothered me. Only mild irritation.

He assumed I was a Beta that first summer. So, I let him think that as I already knew he liked to assert his dominance over me. Typical behavior for young Alphas, and if he knew I was an Omega, he would probably think he could boss me around even more.

It didn't harm anyone to allow him to continue thinking that I was a Beta and I was happy that the kid had stopped tormenting me for the most part. He began to behave more than I ever expected him to. His parents were fond of me for being able to handle their son. Although, it drained me every day.

Most nights I went home and crashed before dinner. Katsuki kept me on my toes all day. On the last day of summer, before school started, I took the young Alpha to a park to let him run around and play soccer with some other kids. Although he didn't play well with others, he more so would hog the ball and threaten the other kids if they didn't follow his lead.

He liked soccer though and was naturally athletic with his Alpha genes. Katsuki never talked about being an Alpha much and it surprised me because he was so arrogant. Maybe it was because of his age? He hadn't begun to think about his status seriously yet. I know soon he will mature when he hits puberty and begin thinking about things like mates and future pack members.

It's only a matter of time before this abnormally wild Alpha turned into an extremely dominant adult Alpha. I often forgot his age. He is different than any other kid I had met and I was kind of glad that my mother signed me up for this. I had expected the worse but in reality, I gained a lot of knowledge and -- a friend? Was it strange to think of a 10-year-old-boy as my friend? Maybe, but it didn't really matter. I spent all summer with him. It would be weirder if I didn't like him at all, right?

Although sometimes it was hard for me to maintain in charge. His Alpha was preening for control. It was like Katsuki could tell that I was an Omega and he was trying to assert himself. Maybe his parents should have hired a professional to watch him? I wasn't necessarily cut out for the job.

Nonetheless, I stayed. After the park, I took him to get ice cream and then we walked back towards his house in comfortable silence. Katsuki had been acting weird all day and I had assumed that he was upset that summer was over. But when we got to his front step he looked at me with a scowl and grabbed the front of my shirt tightly in his fists.

"You're coming back next summer, understand?!" Katsuki yelled and made me widen my eyes in surprise. I bit down on my lip to keep from smirking. He didn't look happy anymore. So, this was why he had been weird all day. He didn't want me to leave? Of course, the Alpha would never say it that out loud. Instead, he would turn to aggression to get his point across. Like he was doing right now. But I couldn't be mad.

I understood him more than he thought. Typical Katsuki, bad with emotions. I learned that quickly when he had a meltdown over not being able to reach something on a shelf closer to the beginning of summer. When I had tried to help him, he kicked my leg and called me 'short for a beta' before running off to destroy his room.

It was only later that week that I found out he had been embarrassed by not being able to reach what he wanted. He didn't like help. Katsuki wanted to be the best and never accepted help from others. He wasn't about to start with me. He really didn't like to be made to feel weak.

Typical Alpha.

Typical Katsuki.

"I don't know if your parents will want me to come back and watch you next summer, but we will see what happens. Okay?" I spoke softly and with a sigh as I watched his fists tighten in the front of my shirt. He was trying to intimidate me by jerking me around, but he wasn't as big as me yet. So I just bent down some to let him think he was the one that had the control. I could tell what was really going on.

He was afraid of being alone again and although his parents loved him very much, they were both busy people. They rarely had time to spend with their own son and Katsuki was the one that suffered from that. It pulled at my Omegan nature seeing a child in distress. Even if said child was an asshole the majority of the time.

He was an adorable kid and it made me a bit sad to be leaving. Especially after I knew he didn't open up to many people. He had been pretty good with me. Regardless of all the 'Deku' slurs and pushy attitude. Katsuki looked at me in silence for a few seconds before he shoved me away, sucking his teeth, and turning his head. I straightened back up as he yanked his door open and paused.

"Whatever, Deku." He muttered lowly before stepping inside and slamming the door behind him. Leaving me stunned and silent on his front porch. I straightened out my shirt that he had wrinkled up in his tantrum and smiled while shaking my head. This kid was something else and I would miss seeing him every day. He made this summer one for the books.

He was funny, energetic, and good entertainment. Plus, I made good money from getting to hang out with the brat. It was a win-win for me and I didn't mind that my summer vacation was taken up by him. It didn't feel like a burden.

"Yeah, I will miss you too kid," I mumbled to myself with a soft chuckle. I turned away from his door and began walking home and thinking about going back to school I would miss Katsuki, and that felt strange. Who knew if I would have another summer like this with him? But I would never forget this past summer. After all, it had been the beginning of a new chapter in my life and I didn't even know it.

Chapter Text

Izuku Midoriya

 

This school year was kicking my ass; it was hard to balance everything from my social life to my school career. On top of that, I was about to turn 16 in less than two months and would get my driver's license. My mom was awesome and helped me get my first car. Meaning that soon I could drive myself around and hang out with my friends.

As summer approached, I began to think about Katsuki and the last time I saw him. He seemed pretty demanding that I returned the next summer to watch him again. The only problem was that I never heard anything from his parents or my mother about if they wanted that again.

I felt kind of bad for the kid. He seemed to really enjoy it last summer. It was hell on earth for me to adjust to the new schedule and atmosphere of being that kid's babysitter, but it was rewarding to see a softer side of Katsuki Bakugou.

Now, I was packing up my dorm room and waiting until my class was dismissed tomorrow to go home for summer. I attended a boarding school so I lived on campus for most of the year. I have packed up my whole room into boxes and left only my bedding unpacked so I could sleep tonight. This summer was going to be great; I would have my license and more freedom.

I had been working while at school as well so that I would have some money saved up. I wanted to hang out with friends and do normal teenager things. Living life to its fullest was never something I was good at; I planed to start now. I wouldn't be young forever.

A few days later I had fully unpacked and got settled into my room at home. My mother was glad I was home. I knew she must get lonely with me gone all the time. I miss her a lot and we are really close since it was just us two. Her mate, my father, left us when I was born. I never knew him, and I didn't care to ever meet him.

A few days went by with me being home again and I started to worry about that Katsuki kid. Was he upset that I didn't show up this summer? Would he even remember our time together last year? Part of me felt bad for not going to say hello to him. It was the least I could do. I just wonder why he had not come over himself? Or why his parents haven't called? They only lived about a block away.

The next day I came right out and asked my mother about it; the guilt had been eating me alive. I felt bad for not even mentioning him or asking if he was okay. I knew my mother and the Bakugou family were close. She would at least know if Katsuki was doing alright.

"Mom, have you heard anything from the Bakugou family about me watching Katsuki again this summer?" I walked past her as I asked and flopped into my seat to dig into my breakfast.

"I heard that Katsuki had been a bit of a troublemaker this school year, the boy had been causing quite the disturbance during school and at home. They asked about having you watch him again, but I assumed that last summer was a lot on you. With his attitude how it is now, I doubt you would be able to handle all that." I watched my mom speak and give me a shrug. I stared at her stupefied by her making this decision for me.

What had gotten into her and that kid? I mean, last summer was rough for a while, but the Alpha wasn't awful to be around. He was just a kid after all. Although he was an uncontrollable young alpha, he was pleasantly docile some days.

"Wait--" I waved her off with a look of confusion plastered on my face. Stopping for a moment, I began thinking. Mitsuki and Masaru asked for me to watch Katsuki again and my mother declined? I wondered how Katsuki must have felt about that? I bet he was disappointed in me. I don't know why that thought upset me, but it did. I didn't want the poor kid to be upset that I refused to come back this summer.

To be fair, I did not know my mom declined. I hadn't refused. My mom had for me.

"I want to though. I mean, the kid seemed pretty demanding that I come back this summer." I laughed it off and shrugged while my mom only looked confused at my sudden change in demeanor.

"You're saying you want to spend your summer watching that Alpha brat?" My mom laughed a bit and part of me wanted to defend Kat; he wasn't that bad. Although I know she loved the Bakugou family very much, she also knew that Katsuki was a handful.

"Honey, you are about to be 16. Don't you want to do your own thing?" Smiling at her concerns, I shook my head suddenly more interested in going to see Katsuki again. That little brat was the highlight of my summer vacation last year. I felt as if I'd die of boredom now without his company.

"Nah, I still have weekends that I can do my own thing. Plus, I need a job as well." With a shrug, I stook up and took my plate to the sink to wash my dishes before I put them away.

"I am going to go over and talk to them about it and see if they still need me." Waving as I ran out of the house, I started walking down the street since I couldn't drive yet. After talking to Mitsuki Bakugou a bit, I left in better spirits than I had arrived. She was glad that I stopped by and told me that she would love for me to watch her son again.

Evidently, Katsuki was home but he was in his room and didn't want to come down. Later, on my first day back, I realized it was because he was mad at me. He thought I wasn't coming back and got sad; it was kind of adorable. After the first week, he had warmed up a bit again and started to act like he did last summer before I went back to school.

He had changed some over the year. He was 10 years old now, almost 11. He had gotten taller and his face had matured a bit as well. It's crazy what a year could do. Not only did his physical appearance change, but his attitude was also more defined as well.

He was more talkative and loud. Kat would frequently yell at things or people. I would catch him yelling at video games or his TV almost once a day. He seemed surprised that I never scolded him for his yelling -- Well, at least when it was directed at me. It just seemed to be a way that he expressed himself.

A month into summer vacation and Katsuki and I were in his family's pool enjoying the summer sun. He was not a swimmer, he just preferred to stick his feet in the water or stay in the shallow end. Maybe he couldn't swim?

"Come on, kid!" I teased him as I swam into the deeper end of the pool. I watched as his little face scrunched up with disgust as he scowled. I couldn't help but laugh at his expression.

"Don't laugh at me, Deku!" He glared and I stifled my chuckles.

"I wouldn't dare, Kat!" I clutched my chest and gasped in mock horror while he only rolled his eyes at me. I swore I saw a small smile on his lips before he wiped it away.

"I don't freakin' want to." He grumbled and I clapped my hand over my mouth to stop from laughing. He sounded so funny with his attitude.

"You'll be fine and if you can't swim I can help you. I won't let you drown, Katsuki." I said softly and smiled at him. This only seemed to piss him off because he growled at me. Yes. This little 10-year-old Alpha growled at me! I widened my eyes in fake terror and then laughed out loud.

"Don't growl at me!" I managed to say in between chuckles. He only smacked the water with his hands before he stormed off into the house, leaving me in a fit of giggles while I quickly pulled myself out of the pool to dry off and go find the tyrant before he set the house on fire to get back at me.

This summer was a lot better than last summer, but also harder in ways as well. Katsuki was growing up some more, maturing, but he was also becoming pushier. He demanded things often, and when he didn't get his way, he would throw fits. If he wanted to watch something that I did not approve of, he would yell and throw pillows when I refused it.

Some things on TV nowadays, children should not see. I stood by that and would not let him watch anything that was in the least bit inappropriate. He hated that about me and voiced his opinion on that quite often.

"You're so annoying! I am almost 11! I can watch this show if I want to!" Katsuki yelled at me while throwing the pillows off the sofa that we were sitting on together. After that outburst, I had snatched the remote, holding it tightly and changing the show to something else. I had dozed off for what seemed seconds and opened my eyes to some sex scene going on between two doctors on the TV. I had squealed and changed the show while Katsuki was watching it like nothing was wrong.

I, on the other hand, was red as a tomato. "You don't need to see that stuff! You're a kid!" I yelled while my heart was thumping wildly in my chest. I couldn't believe he was watching that like nothing was wrong. He must be too young to really notice, or care about, that stuff. Thank the goddess.

Then, Katsuki tried to jerk the remote back from me and failed miserably. He huffed and flopped down on the sofa, giving up and letting me pick a more suitable show. As I sat back down with him again, I brushed my fingers through his spiky ash-blond hair and smirked down at him. His head was resting beside my thigh and he had a pout on his face.

I ignored him and just kept pushing my fingers through his hair until he relaxed. Some things would probably never change with him. While other things seemed to be getting better with time. One thing for sure was that Katsuki would always have his sparky temper. I couldn't see that part of him ever changing.

He would make a great Alpha one day; I only hoped he would learn to control his anger better in the future. It would only help him in the future to be able to follow his dreams and become the best version of himself that he could be. If he could learn some self-control.

For now, I would just continue to let him grow up and offer my friendship and guidance when he asked for it. His parents adored me. They often praised me and told me how Katsuki seemed like a different person when summer was here. They had never seen their son so relaxed.

I knew they must worry about him; he had such a strong personality.

It was a wonder that he managed to have friends at all. Although this year he mentioned that he is still friends with Kirishima and even made a friend that he called annoying all the time; his name was Denki, also known as 'the dumb one' to Katsuki.

As our second summer came to an end, Katsuki was more upset that I was leaving for school again. I could see it in his eyes and felt it rolling off him in waves days prior to my leaving. He was extra clingy and never left me alone; I didn't mind though. I made sure to spend time with him and when my last day came to an end, he was shaking slightly on his front steps as I was telling him goodbye again.

"What's wrong Katsuki?" I was looking down at his slightly shorter frame. I couldn't help but smile. It wasn't that I had been happy about his struggle. It only made me smile becasue it showed me how much he actually enjoyed me being around. He scowled and huffed in annoyance at my subtle grin.

"You're leaving again." He was frowning as he spoke quietly and I sighed. It must have grabbed his attention because he looked up at me and furrowed his eyebrows in disgust I would imagine.

"I know, but I will be back next year. Even if I can't watch you again, I will always make sure to come to visit you, okay?" I tried to hide my sadness. My voice was soft and I didn't want him to be sad any longer than he was going to be. Who was I kidding, Katsuki didn't get sad, he got mad.

I chuckled softly at the thought and he growled again.

"Whatever." He clicked his tongue he rolled his eyes at me while I reached out and ruffled his hair before patting his head softly.

"I promise. Okay? Can you do me a favor though?" Asking softly, I left my hand in his messy hair. He gave an aggravated huff but looked at me, his gaze softening some at my concerned expression.

"What is it?" He muttered and I couldn't help it. I smirked again.

"Be good this year at school, okay? You have so much potential. Be smart, be tough, be respectful. Make me proud, Kat." I swore I saw a faint dusting of pink on his nose and cheeks and he quickly pulled away while turning around. He opened his door and ran inside, slamming the door behind him again.

Some things never change, huh?

I hummed in thought before getting into my car and driving back home. Katsuki had given me a sense of purpose this past year and seeing him relax and open up showed me his real personality. He has become something that gave me a feeling of purpose and fulfillment.

This brat was slowly becoming one of my favorite people; although he was annoying and a tyrant most days, I couldn't help but miss seeing his scowls when I was back at school. He was like a little brother that I never had. He was suddenly dropped down into my world and was becoming a part of my life. I shook my head and focused on the road.

Until next year, Kat.

Chapter Text

Katsuki Bakugou

 

It had been about four years since my mom and dad kept Izuku around for summer vacations. Meeting him when I was 9 years old had been the best and the worst, considering he had basically watched me grow up. That also meant he had to witness me grow out of my asshole phase.

I was about to turn 14 in April and didn't think I needed a babysitter anymore. But I didn't mind Izuku being around; he was pretty cool and nice to talk to. This summer has been the best so far.

Unlike other summers, we had been going out and doing more things since I was older now. Mom thought I could handle myself better now that I started cleaning up my act during the school year. I took his advice and tried to get along with others. I stopped picking fights and being a complete dick. Just like Izuku had asked me to do. It was paying off.

I didn't know why I had listened to him. But he always gave me good advice, and for some reason, I wanted to make him proud of me. He gave me a chance and didn't judge me for my behavior as others did. He only tried to help me.

However nice it was to spend time with me, Izuku would be leaving for college soon. He said that we would still get to see each other during the summers when he comes home, but that he would be far away for the rest of the year.

He finally got accepted to his dream school, not that I will ever understand all that loving school crap. He seemed happy and I was happy for him.

School sucked, but I was still a top student. I was the smartest in my class, of course, everyone knew it. My friends were great and although sometimes they annoy the shit out of me, I wouldn't want anyone else around me. They kept me company when Izuku was gone.

Lately, things had been changing for me though and I didn't like what it was doing to my emotions. My mom said it was called puberty or some shit like that. I had always known I was an Alpha, but lately, my pheromones have been developing and it was a nightmare to handle.

Mom would get pissy with me all the time when I accidentally started releasing my pheromones in public. It wasn't like I could handle it yet. Half the time, I had no idea when I was releasing them. I made a little girl cry because I scared her in the mall with my pheromones. I was only trying to tell her she looked pretty. But my mom yelled at me saying I was 'crowding her' with my scent.

It had been a real pain. But days like this made me happy and helped me forget all this Alpha maturity crap. Izuku wanted to go to the lake today and invited me along since it was technically his job to entertain me over the summer. But things didn't feel forced with him.

He was a good friend to me. Even if he was 18 now and I was only 14. Four years didn't seem too much of an age gap, but he was an adult. I had to remember that somedays when I thought of him as more of a friend than a babysitter. Technically, I was a job for him. But he didn't treat me that way. He treated me like family.

The sun was beating down and I was waist-deep in the lake, skipping rocks and waiting for Izuku to get back from the bathroom. He had been acting a little different these past few days and it was starting to piss me off.

He wasn't paying me as much attention and was always smiling at his phone and texting. He told me it was his friend he was texting, some guy he calls 'Shoto' from his school. However, it was really starting to annoy me. I normally had all of his attention over the summer. It was not only his job, but he was my friend and I didn't see him all year. He should be hanging out with me when he had the chance to.

I threw another rock in the lake, watching it skip a few times before it sunk to the bottom of the water. It was quiet other than the sound of the trees brushing against each other and the birds singing in the distance. Relaxing, and I was surprised we had never come here before during our past summers together.

The water was almost a warm temperature. Yet only my feet felt cool as they perched deeper under the water's surface. I laid my hands flat on the water's surface and looked back towards shore, wondering where my idiot babysitter was.

He had been gone for a good while now and I was starting to worry some. I shuffled out of the lake I started padding barefoot across the gravel and grass towards where the bathrooms are located. I could hear some faint voices and the sound of Izuku's laugh.

Was he talking to someone? I could smell all the people around mixed with Izuku's scent. It smelt like another Alpha and Izuku. The thought of him ignoring me for some other Alpha had me growling under my breath and stomping off towards his voice. He was supposed to be hanging out with me and I catch him hanging out with some other guy on one of our last days together.

My eyes rolled at the thought and I huffed I walked around the building to find what he was doing and I didn't know why I cared so much, but I did. I could feel my body tensing up as I walked around the building and I froze at what I saw.

Izuku was standing next to some boy with navy blue hair who was shirtless and leaning up against the wall. He looked to be around Izuku's age but was much taller and more built. Izuku had always been smaller than others his age. He was too tiny to be an Alpha and his behavior suited a Beta more. But damn, he was small even now. Standing next to the Alpha he looked so fragile and that pissed me off. He could get hurt walking off alone with strangers.

The Alpha had a smirk on his lips as he looked over Izuku from head to toe before giving him a wink. I felt my blood start to boil and I began grinding my teeth. What set me on edge was that I could hear Izuku giggling and my eyes snapped up to see Izuku blushing and saying something back quietly to the guy.

I didn't know why body and face felt like it was on fire right, or why my hands were shaking, but I didn't like the way that dunce was looking at my friend. There is something wrong with him standing so close to Izuku and eyeing him like his next meal.

"Hey!" My chest rumbled loudly and I saw Izuku's head snap in my direction before he gave me a wry smile. What was that crap? That stupid half-smile? I felt my body tremble and I could see something flash on Izuku's face. He tilted his head and sniffed at the air while his face scrunched up. He looks like he was holding his breath.

I began to grind my teeth together and I vaguely remembered him saying my scent has been strong lately.

"You were taking forever." Izuku watched me but didn't move away from the guy so I snapped my teeth at him. I narrowed my eyes and tried to hold back my anger that he wasn't getting it. I rolled my eyes at him and he did the worst thing I could imagine at the moment. He fucking smirked at me.

"Hey Kat! I ran into a friend. I was just saying bye." Izuku said and gave the navy haired extra a sweet smile before walking over to me and leaning down close to my ear.

My breath hitched and I could feel an unfamiliar heat creep up my neck and stain my cheeks pink. Why was my stupid body reacting like this lately? I couldn't seem to ever stop blushing around Izuku or thinking about how he smelt when he got close. Stupid Alpha hormones! It has got to be that.

All I could ever think about was how everyone smelt lately. But Izuku's scent was extra sweet-smelling.

"Katsuki, pull back your scent some. You're suffocating me." My body flinched when Izuku spokes softly in my ear. All I could do to cover up the shiver that ran through me was huff. He brushed his fingers through my hair, the same as he had a hundred times before, only this time the soft touch had me wanting to tremble. I shoved his hand away quickly and growled before walking off towards the lake again. I glanced back to make sure he was following me.

He chuckled but jogged to catch up with me. I wanted to frown at his light mood. Was he picking on me? I couldn't control my pheromones just yet. It happened sometimes when I was worked up! Stupid ass Deku. He had no clue what it was like to be controlled by biology. Betas have it easy.

I shot the prick with navy hair another glare before putting my focus on the lake. Izuku caught up with me and bumped his shoulder with mine.

"You don't have to make fun of me," I grumbled with a scowl on my face. Sure, I picked on him all the time. But this was different. I never picked on him for things he couldn't control.

Izuku was like my family and I didn't have any siblings. After two summers ago when Izuku asked me to do better at school, I started to think of him as an older brother. I never wanted any other boys around him since then. I didn't want any other boys taking my place. I was afraid that he would forget about me. One day he would leave me and never come back.

Izuku didn't need any other brothers or friends. He didn't need anyone that would take my place. Especially lately, I felt this swarm of protective and possessiveness that followed me around. Some people triggered it, and Izuku seemed to be one of those people.

Lately, I had been picking up on people's scents a lot better as well. Everyone smelt so differently, but Izuku's scent was amazing.

It was a comforting scent that made me relax and feel safe. It was like family -- but better.

I liked when he was around because I felt good with him close by. I knew that no one would bother me when he was around. No stupid extras could bother me when he was by my side. Mainly because I didn't pay attention to anyone else when Izuku was with me. It wiped those worries away when we were together.

"I wouldn't dream of making fun of you, Katsuki." Izuku snickered playfully before dropping his tank top to the ground. He ran back into the lake with a huge smile and I shook my head. Izuku wasn't like other kids his age. I could tell that better now.

He had just turned 18 a week ago, yet his body looked similar to mine and I was almost 14. I was an Alpha. I was supposed to grow taller and stronger than the other sub-genders. It was still odd that he was so small for an adult.

Alpha's were generally larger and built stronger. Even now, I looked older than I was. But Izuku was short. His body was thin and lean with hardly any muscle mass. I thought he would look weird with a bunch of muckles thought. His body seemed to just -- work. He was perfect so it didn't matter.

He had pale skin and soft features and I had always thought he looked strange for a Beta. I followed him after grabbing some more stones for throwing.

Izuku was swimming around to my right and avoided the stones that I was throwing. Some days I wondered what things would be like if I had never met him all those years ago. I don't remember much from those days, but I do remember that he never yelled at me or snapped at me like other people did when I acted out.

He was calm when I was a raging storm. I knew I was hard to handle. Yet, for some reason, he never left and never made me feel bad for how I was. He only tried to help me control myself better. Izuku was smart and kind. Caring for people seemed to be in his nature.

"Deku, can we get some food soon?" Izuku ran his fingers through his wet hair and pulled the strands away from his face as I chuck another stone. It skipped a few times before it sunk with the others.

"Ugh, I told you to stop calling me 'Deku', Kat. I don't know why you insist on calling me 'useless'. You're not a little kid anymore either. You can call me Izuku as long as you're not being a brat -- again." Izuku laughed and I glared at him. I hated when he laughed at me.

"I don't act like a brat!" I growled and smacked the water, sending a splash at his face. Izuku only bellowed out more laughter and rolled his eyes

"Oh, because that wasn't a brat move?" Laughing he has a playful smirked in my direction and made my face heat up again. Why did that always happen? I hated it when he talked down to me like that! It was so embarrassing.

"Shut up, Deku," I mumbled and went back to throwing rocks. Izuku smirked and swam over to me. He stood beside me watching as I tossed rocks and I tensed a little at how close he was to me. It didn't bother me but I couldn't bring myself to look over at him. My face was still hot and I was afraid of making a fool of myself in front of him. Again.

If anything, I liked when he was close. Just not right now.

I liked falling asleep on the couch together because he would always hold me close and play with my hair. I just liked being near him. He was my best friend, even if I never tell him how much he means to me.

I have a feeling he knew that I cared.

"How have things been since you've started producing your Alpha pheromones?"

He asked me suddenly and I stopped mid-toss and looked at him curiously. We never really talked about this stuff before; I mean he was just some Beta. Maybe he was curious about what it was like?

He was the normal one of the sub-genders. Betas had it easy. They didn't really go through anything serious like pheromone production, ruts, or heats like Alpha's and Omega's do. Although I know little about Omegas, I heard that it is pretty rough for them as well.

I had to learn about all these things since I presented as an Alpha when I was 5 years old. I learned about ruts, pheromones, mates, marking, and so on. I still didn't know much about mates and I didn't really care for it either.

I just enjoyed being a top dog. People respected Alphas.

"It's fine. Mom said I was doing better with controlling it. It only gets worse when I am mad or something." I shrugged I tossed a rock again. Izuku humed beside me and nodded his head. He looked lost in thought for a while.

Izuku didn't say anything else and after another 30 minutes of swimming around and tossing rocks, Izuku finally got out of the water and dried off.

"Come one, we're gonna go get some food before going back to your house. What do you want?" HE looked towards me as I followed him and Izuku tossed me a dry towel for me to dry off with. I shrugged and then smiled as the food of choice rushed to my mind.

"Spicy curry!" Grinning excitedly I watched how Izuku cracked a smile and nodded.

"Sound's good to me. Got to celebrate with my favorite brat and stuff right? This is my last summer before college." I froze with a frown as Izuku chuckled and slipped on his flip flops before he pulled his tank top back on. I watched him with the same frown as he finished getting dressed. I wished he didn't talk about leaving so much. It made me sad. Even though he would come back every summer. This one felt different because he would be so far away for university.

The time that he was gone really sucked a lot. It was like a part of my family left. Thankfully I have my only other real friends, Kirishima and Denki. Kirishima was a dork, but he was cool to talk to at school. Denki was shy but seemed to attach to me quickly. I didn't mind. He was an Omega after all, and Omegas tend to latch to an Alpha they feel safe around. It was strange but I somehow felt honored that Denki chose me.

"Yeah, we sure do." I shook the thoughts of my idiot friends away and sighed softly. I slipped my shoes on as well before following him to his car. On days like this, I wished Izuku never had to leave. It made me realize how lucky I was to have met him and give him a chance. When he was hired by my mom for years ago, I had been a mess to deal with. But he never gave up on me.

I made a great friend who took me on little day-trips and bought me food. Who listened to me complain and was still nice to me. I didn't think I would be able to smile as much as I do now if it wasn't for Izuku. Being friends with him as helped me be better friends with Kiri and Kami at school.

I even made a friend with a girl named Jiro. She was really cute, I kind of had a crush on her at first but she was too quiet for me to talk to a lot. Another Omega, only she didn't attach to me as Denki had.

Izuku helped me make her a card for her birthday last year. He really was like the big brother I never had. I would do anything for him. Be anything for him. I had grown to love him in a weird sort of way. Izuku was a part of my life now and I hoped to always have him in my life. When the time comes and I am an adult, I had the feeling that I would make him pack. He was family. The family is a pack.

I wanted to be friends with Izuku even when he gets on my nerves so bad with his damn mumbling and stupid jokes. Or when he makes me clean up my messes and when I fight him over the remote and yelled at him for messing with my hair too much.

I wanted to be his friend when he eats the last slice of pizza or continued to pick on me for stupid things. For some reason, I didn't mind it when it came from him.

I wanted to be his friend when he was growing up and moving on with his life while I am stuck behind for just a bit longer. I felt like I would always be chasing after him. One step behind. But I didn't mind.

I wanted to be with him when he called me a brat or kid and made me angry; I wanted that.

Yeah, even then -- I wanted that.

Chapter Text

𝓘𝔃𝓾𝓴𝓾 𝓜𝓲𝓭𝓸𝓻𝓲𝔂𝓪

 

I had been talking to this cute guy from school for about a month now. His name was Shoto and he was interesting; he was one of my first friends when I started high school. Although, I just recently started developing a crush on him. Oh yeah, I also discovered that I am gay. Over the past few years, females never really caught my attention.

There was something about men that just drew me in. The strong features captivated me. Not even female Alphas grabbed at my attention the way males did. Shoto was amazing in every way. He was tall and dominant, yet kind and soft or shy at times. He made me smile and feel special.

When I started to notice boys more than girls, it had been a little odd; I thought something was wrong with me. Turned out I just found guys more attractive than girls. After a bit of experimenting with a couple of blind dates, I found out the truth.

My mother accepted me with open arms, it helped that I was an omega, I guess. I could still have children because of this and same-sex couples were very common in the society we lived in.

Kat seemed a bit caught off guard at the lake when I was talking to that guy. The guy had caught my attention and was flirting with me, so I felt like I might as well get his number or something. I guess Kat didn't know I was into guys. I did wonder if he even thought about that at his age. Well, he is a teenager now. So, maybe he did.

Katsuki had also been a lot clingier this summer. He always asked what I was doing and who I was texting with. I guessed he was jealous that I was not giving him my full attention like I normally did over the summers.

This year I had grown up a lot and started things like dating and jobs. My life had been a lot busier and I had more things on my mind than just Katsuki like most summers. The kid was amazing and I had grown quite fond of him, but I had grown up myself as well. I had more to do than watch movies on the sofa with him like before.

On the way back to his house, his mom called me and asked if I could stay the night and stay with Katsuki because they were going out of town. They offered to pay be triple for staying the night, so of course, I agreed to it. I guess Katsuki was going to get a bit more attention now. Maybe that would make him happy?

I really hated to think that he was sad sometimes. He had grown on me and I had a huge soft spot for him.

"So, what do you want to do this evening? You've got me to yourself for longer than usual today!" I tried to cheer him up some. This seemed to work. I knew he was excited that I would be spending the night, although I was not prepared at all. I had no extra clothes with me, but it didn't matter really. I could fit into Katsuki's clothes easily. He was about as tall as I was at almost 14. I was freshly 18. that was the card I had been dealt with being an Omega. Genes and all that shit.

"I don't care." Katsuki hummed and shrugged his shoulders. If people didn't know him, they would think he was rude as fuck. In reality, he was just this way. I have gotten used to his speech patterns by now. This was Katsuki's way of communicating, I have learned the drill by now.

"What about we watch a movie or something? I can go get snacks while you set up and pick something to watch?" I asked with a smile, knowing he loved watching movies. He was a sucker for the classics honestly. For such a young age, he was brilliant and enjoyed reading and watching classic films.

"Fine." Katsuki smiled a bit and I knew that was he was of telling me he was excited for tonight. I had to admit that I was as well. It had been a while since we hung out like this. It had been weeks since our last sleepover. I huffed under my breath and sighed to myself. I was too old to be getting excited over having a sleepover. However, I was excited to spend some time with him again like this.

I had spent the night a few times in the past when his parents had date nights or emergencies. We always had fun together, but it had been a while and I could tell that Kat missed me when we had shorter days together.

He didn't seem to really have many other plans over the summer; I wondered if he didn't make plans with his friend because he knew I would come over?

We pulled up to his house around six o'clock in the evening, the sun was a nice orange color in the sky as I parked the car. Kat hopped out while grabbing his towels and swim bag that was packed with a few water bottles, sunscreen, and extra clothes.

He always carried the stuff from the car into the house when we were together, it had become a habit now. He really would make a great Alpha to someone one day. He had an instinct to provide and protect and it was nice to see a young kid that was well rounded. He was learning how to be mature in the world.

Mature. What a weird word to add in a sentence that was about Katsuki. I chuckled to myself. He was growing up well. It was hard to see it sometimes, but he was. He was not the same 9-year-old boy that harassed me and tore the house apart when I first met him.

After we had both taken showers and changed into dry and clean clothes, I looked around the kitchen for snacks to see what we had and see if Kat wanted anything else. We didn't have much than popcorn.

"Popcorn is all that we have, what else do you want, and I can go to the store across the street while you set up." Katsuki had slumped on the sofa, he looked tired. Today had been a long day in the sun for sure. I always felt warm and tired after spending a day in the sun.

I would be surprised if he stayed awake while I was out.

"You're going out alone?" Kat asked, sitting up and rubbing his eyes with the back of his hands. He was suddenly awake now. The cute eye rubbing was something he still did that I thought was adorable when he was younger. It still was adorable now.

"Yeah, I am a big kid." I laughed and smiled at the open-mouthed yawn he let out.

"I will be fine." Kat didn't seem to like that and stood up while going to grab his shoes. I laughed and stopped him by grabbing his shoulders quickly.

"Kat, I am an adult. You are tired, how about you take a short nap while I do this that way we can stay up longer tonight for movies and bro time?" I pushed his shoulders gently and let go when I saw his eyes flicker towards the stairs that led to his bedroom.

I knew he was tired.

"I -- I will be fine. I am not that tired. You shouldn't go out at night alone." He said sternly but I could see him fighting off fatigue. I wondered why he was being such a pain about this. I was an adult. He didn't know I was an Omega at all. I could see him acting this way if he knew I was an Omega or something. Maybe it was because I was small still? I smirk to myself and wonder how he never figured it out by now. He was a smart kid, so I wondered why it was taking him so long. Maybe I should just tell him? I doubt he would pick on me for it now. He would back then, but he had changed since then.

"Nope. I am fine. I am a big kid, remember?" I snickered and ruffled his hair and he batted my hand away with an annoyed huff.

"Go rest, I will be back soon. You have my cell number, call if you need something or if anything happens. Okay?" I give him a stern look and he just rolls his eyes and huffs, turning to head upstairs.

"Fine."

"And remember!" I shouted as he headed up the stairs. "Do not open the door for strangers! I have a key so I will be able to get in!" I heard him click his tongue and grunt as he walked up the stairs before he slammed his bedroom door.

I chuckled and slipped my shoes on before grabbing my keys and wallet and heading outside. It was about 7:30pm now and the sun was setting. It was a beautiful location and a pleasant walk. I didn't mind walking instead of driving.

By the time I got to the store, I had received a text from Kat listing a few snacks he wanted. That damn Alpha apatite was going to run a hole into my wallet. I smirked at his requests and walked into the store, grabbing a hand-held basket and walking down the snack section.

After wandering around for some time, I finally found what I was looking for and I grab them. I had already snatched a few items that Kat wanted and was now picking some things that I was craving. Chocolate.

I grabbed a bag of chocolate candies and threw them in the basket. I also grabbed a can of pineapple chunks. I had been craving those things all-day. After paying, I hung the bag on my arm and started on my walk back to the house. It was dark now and I had spent too much time in that store. I sighed and looked at my phone.

Katsuki hadn't texted or called, he must be asleep. I hummed and put my phone away but the more I walked, the more tired I began feeling. It was a weird feeling and I thought that I might have gotten a little sunburn or something. My skin is feeling a bit tender and hot.

The bag on my arm suddenly felt much heavier and my face felt flushed. What was going on? Was my sugar dropping or some shit? My mind wandered back to the chocolate I had been craving and I shook my head. Maybe my body was trying to say I was running low on sugars?

That could be why I felt so lousy and tired right now.

A sudden pain jabbed in my stomach made me gasp and tense up. I almost dropped the bag on my arm. What the hell?!

"Hey, dude! Are you okay?" I heard the sound of some guy shouting from across the road. My hands clutched at my stomach and I felt a way too familiar wave of desire run through my body. It was tying knots in my stomach and my hands began to sweat.

I had never felt this feeling before in my life. My mind was at a loss when it hit me.

My heat. My first heat had hit -- Now? That wasn't supposed to happen unless I had already made contact with my mate. I would have known if I had -- right?

"Hey, dude!" The voice was next to me now and my eyes widened. I looked over at the guy while struggling to stay on my feet. The last thing I wanted was to -- submit -- right there. I gulped and blinked my eyes clear of any forming tears. He looked to be around my age but that was all I could see with how hazy my vision was.

"Shit." I gasped and dropped the bag while I doubled over in pain. The guy grabbed me quickly and I jerked away.

"Don't!" I shout and felt myself start to panic; this can't happen now. I needed to be home. I need to go home. I was supposed to be home while going into heat. So I could nest and be safe. I wasn't safe here. I had never given much thought to how I would spend my heat before. But now, I wished that I had. I wished I was prepared for this.

I couldn't go back like this to Katsuki. But I have nowhere else to go. I can't get to my house by walking like this. It would be too far of a walk. I wouldn't make it without attracting other Alphas.

"It's okay. I am an Omega too; you're going through you're first heat or something. I can smell you from far away, I came over as fast as I could. Let me help you back home, you can't be here alone right now. Anything could happen to you man." His concerned voice was ringing in my ear and I just nodded. I couldn't be here alone any longer. If my scent was that bad, any Alpha would be hot on my tail. I needed to get inside. The Bakugou house would just have to do for now.

"Okay, tell me where you need to go." The voice said softly, and I mumbled the address quickly in between gasps and pants. I felt like I can't breathe, what is this?! I grab at the collar of my shirt and pulled it down, thinking if I move it some, I would breathe better.

I had to breath better. I felt as if I was suffocating.

"Okay, hold onto me." The guy said and grabbed my waist while picking up the bag on the ground. With his help, we safely made it back to the house. But by now, my body was burning up and my pants feel wet. I briefly remembered what this was. Slick. I was producing slick. Part of me wanted to throw up while another part of me wanted nothing more than to rip my clothes off and ease the symptoms of my heat. My brain felt foggy and I barely recognized where I was.

The house smelt familiar though and something about this space felt safe, warm, and pleasurable.

The door opened and I flinched. He must have dug out my keys. After a few steps inside, I felt the guy's arms unwind from me and I groaned while sliding down the wall of the kitchen. I hugged my knees to my chest and whined. My body wouldn't stop burning.

"H-hot..." I groaned and tugged my shirt up. I threw it harshly across the room. A burst of air cooled my skin some but after a few seconds my flesh heats back up and I cry out in pain. I claw my hands down my chest with a pathetic whine.

"H-hurts!" I whimpered and looked around. Where was I? I thought I knew this place; it smells familiar. It smells good. I gazed around until my eyes landed on some guy standing there in front of me.

Who was he again? Did he help me here? I couldn't remember. But he was looking at me and coming closer, so he must be here to help this stop.

"H... Hng! H-Help?!" I cried out and looked at him in desperation. This stranger could help the burn stop. He helped me get home I thought, so he must be able to help.

I felt chills run up my spine when the man crouched down in front of me. He laid his palm on my bare chest and I groaned. The place his hand touched was slowly sedating the burn. My heated skin was cooling and leaving tingles in its trail.

"Oh, my sweet little omega. Your alpha is here to help you." The man says with a sickly-sweet smile. All I could do was groan and shudder under his hands.

He could help, he could help, he could help.

My brain was on repeat. The only thing that mattered was the pain and making it go away. Every touch, every word, slowly made the pain fade and my mind became more hazed. His scent was suffocating and screaming of Alpha pheromones. It sent shock waves through my core and I shuddered on the cold tiles.

"H-help... Yes... H-help." I managed to croak and looked up in desperation at the man who claimed to be able to save me from this pain.

My Alpha.

He said he was my Alpha.

Submit.

Chapter Text

𝓘𝔃𝓾𝓴𝓾 𝓜𝓲𝓭𝓸𝓻𝓲𝔂𝓪

Everything hurt.

What was happening to me?

The man hovering over me was nothing but blurred fragments. Only fractions of what was happening kept breaking through my jumbled mind. It has taken a long time for my brain to process what my situation was, but when it became clear, I felt nothing but overwhelming panic. My back was pressed halfway to the floor and bent against the kitchen wall. I was staring up at the man who claimed to want to help me. I was in heat.

Somewhere in the back of my mind, I wanted to reject this man from touching me like this. My body both recoiled in disgust while my Omegan nature shivered under his promising hands. His scent was strong but it was not the scent that I was being drawn to right now. I could smell something much sweeter, faintly in the background; that scent was the one I wanted.

"Nngh..." I grunted as the Alpha's pheromones assaulted my nose, forcing my body to cave in. Taunting every fiber within me to submit. I couldn't find the energy in my limbs to fight back. His scent was strong and heavy. I flinched back and my nose twitched as something sweeter in the background caught my attention. That scent was the one I wanted.

"Be a good little Omega and stay still." Taking a moment to comprehend, the man stood hovering over me. His shadow was cast over my smaller frame, somehow making the dimly-lit room grow even darker under his gaze.

At first, my mind was cracked with bubbles of pleasure popping along my skin until I realized; his hands were everywhere. First brushing over my neck in the most sensitive of places, ripping a shocked and uncomfortable moan from my body.

"N - No, s - stop it!" I pleaded, feeling helpless under the weight of my hear. My body was stirring to life unwillingly. I slammed my eyes shut while a wave of heat crashed over my system and my mouth began to water. My stomach churned with the possibility that this man could do whatever he wanted to me. I was weak.

He seemed to only be encouraged by my sounds. His hands moved through my hair and fingertips trailed down my chest before roughly pushing back up my exposed skin before scraping down my stomach. I realized then and there that I really was weak. An Omega. Weak.

A low growl rumbled from his throat, seizing my body up and then releasing the tension in my muscles. A burst of cold air licked my overheated flesh before I could understand that I had already pulled my shirt from my overheated body. I writhed as my stomach coiled with a desire that I wished would go away. I weakly shoved my hands out to push him away.

Wet lips were now latched to my nipple, forcing an unwelcomed shout of surprise out of my throat followed by a whimper of pure emotional pain.

"Ngaahh! P - Please, stop." I sighed when his tongue flicked the taught bud before he lowered himself down more. His hands dropped down to the waistband of my jeans as he trailed his lips and tongue down my torso. The line of spit leaving a cold tingle as it mixed with the air.

"That's a good boy." The Alpha cooed against my flushed skin. The sound of blood and static rushed my head, ringing behind my ears as my heart struggles to pump blood through my veins at the pace it was racing. But, before I could react, his hands roughly shoved me flat on my back onto the hardwood floor.

The sharp smack of my head on the floor clears my head from the fog for a moment. What was I doing? Why couldn't I move? My mouth fell open, trying to form words as a dull throb pounded in the back of my skull.

I gasped at the pain and sucked in a deep breath through my nose. Inhaling sharply, I was once again assaulted by thick Alpha hormones as well as something faint in the distance. Something sweet with an almost burnt smell began tickling my nose.

My senses zoned in on this one faint trail of scent that made my body shudder. For just a moment before I was being ripped from my daydream and brought back to the current situation. Unfamiliar hands were shoved roughly in the back of my jeans, groping me, kneading my flesh as if appraising something that does not belong to him. I didn't belong to him.

"Haa... You... Get off m - me..." His scent continued to brutally force my body into submission, sending tremors down my spine. His hands groped my backside, his fingers dancing dangerously close to something I was not prepared for. My body betrayed me, jerking as pleasure rushed to my core. My member throbbed with need while I cursed every cell in my body that was forcing me into this.

This person was not my mate and his scent was not the one that I was wanting.

There was something faint in the background that flooded my scenes and kept my body teetering on the edge of blind lust and uncomfortable realization that this man is going to take advantage of me. He was going to rape me. With a sudden boost of confidence and clarity, my hands shoved at his chest.

"N-no! Get off me!" I shouted breathlessly. In my head, my words were loud and clear, but once leaving my body they sounded dry and cracked. They sounded weak. Why couldn't I move? Please, let me move!

My body was reacting to his hands as more slick wets my already damp jeans. My member was pulsing uncomfortably beneath my clothing. However, on almost a primal instinct, my legs twitched out, trying to kick the man off. I wanted to reject the touch of another that was not my Alpha.

This man was not my alpha. Where was my alpha?

In an instant, my hesitation left room for a strong wave of my heat. It crashed through my veins faster than I could comprehend as the Alpha o top of me growled. He ran his nose along my throat and my mind went blank.

Submit.

Submit.

Submit.

Why wasn't my mate here to take care of me during my heat? That was his job.

Submit.

This should be my Alpha's job. Does my mate not want me?

Submit.

Submit.

My mind was taken by the heat again. My logic was running out the door faster than my self-control was. Is this what I was meant for? I had never had problems with being an Omega before. I loved myself and was never treated like this... Like a breeding-ground... Like an... Omega.

My hands shook and I closed my eyes tightly. I shut out the images my mind kept sending me. Something was wrong. I could feel something was so wrong. It was different from the assault my body was taking. It was something else. Something was wrong.

Submit.

I yelped when I was roughly flipped over onto my stomach and my jeans were being jerked down past my ass. I unintentionally moaned before gasping when calloused hands gripped the supple flesh that was now exposed to this stranger.

"Oh goddess, n - no..." My pleas were weak, muffled by whines and instinctual chirps of foreign pleasure that his hands were bringing me. My stomach churned. I cramped up as bile burned the back of my throat.

"Why are you so thick with distress my omega?" The alpha rumbled deeply behind my body and I whimpered. I clenched my teeth together; he is not my mate.

I needed my mate.

A whine of distress bubbled up at the realization that my Alpha, my mate, was not here and I wiggled as much as I could while still under the power of my heat. My biology was telling me to submit but my mind was focused back on that sweet and smoky scent that was growing.... stronger?

With a strong shake of my head, I thrashed harshly, once before...

"Get off me!" I managed to shout before my face was being smashed harder into the floor and held there. My back arched as my eyes rolled into the back of my head. Why did I -- Why did I like this? I didn't want this.

"You have no say here, omega. You are mine now, now shut up and submit!" He growled and I cry out once again. This time from the pain that was radiating in my head from the blow it took against the hardwood flooring. But still, I managed to snap back at the man clinging to me.

Submit.

Submit.

No.

"Not my mate!" I squealed and growled as his free hand smacked at the exposed flesh of my ass and then disappeared from my body a moment. My eyes flashed open as the strange but calming scent of caramel wafted into my face and before I could even open my eyes again, I was purring.

Moaning loudly, I arched my back. My instincts had taken over and I frantically tried to lift my head to find the source of that sweet scent. But my head was pinned down still by a rough hand that was making my body bubble with anger.

"N-no! NO!" I shouted again and although I was not in control of my body, with how my mind was fogged and my body was trembling with desire, my instincts were clear. I knew this man was not my mate and I fought him as much as I could. I wouldn't let another Alpha claim me; I couldn't betray my mate.

Kicking my legs around desperately, I landed a knee in his gut causing him to roar out and his fingers tightened their death grip on my hair.

"Why you little bitch!" Before I could think of a next move, there was a loud crash followed by a yelp. When the man's body slumped over and fell on top of me, my eyes widened and darted around frantically. My body seemed to be on autopilot as I writhed around and cried out in pain. His body was pressed against mine and it hurt with how exposed my body was.

This sweet scent in the air was thick and overpowering. The man rolled off me and struggled to push himself up. Looking up, I frantically tried to locate the source of the scent. I blink in confusion when my eyes landed on Katsuki. The blond stood over the man with teary eyes and a heated glare.

The man growled and pushed himself off the floor, directing all his rage towards the young blond who had just saved me. This scent, it belonged to Katsuki.

I stared at him with hazed-over eyes and my chest rose and fell rapidly with every passing moment of silence. The young Alpha was glaring daggers that could kill at the male kneeling and clutching the side of his head. He had now pushed himself onto his knees and was returning the glare towards Katsuki.

"You fucking brat didn't anyone tell you to not interfere with an Alpha trying to mate!?" The man roared but Katsuki stood his ground, trembling but determined to protect me. The sight alone made the Omega in me croon proudly with a need to roll over and submit. The scent was overwhelming along with distress pheromones from the young boy.

"Leave him alone!" Katsuki growled and balled his fists up. Another wave of my heat lashed out at my body and my head fell back onto the floor with a loud crack. My body was screaming from the pain of my heat and tears spilled freely from my eyes as I struggled to stay conscious. The only thing on my mind, other than the intense desire for my mate, was the thought of Katsuki being injured by this man.

I needed to protect him. It was my job to protect him. Somewhere in the back of my lust-crazed mind, I knew that Katsuki was scared and that I was his guardian in situations where his parents were gone.

I refused to let anyone hurt him. But there was another force pulling me to also protect what I saw as mine.

"Stupid kid!" I watched as the man scowled in disgust and his hand pulled back. He was about to hit Katsuki.

My body lurched forward, and in just enough time, I managed to grab the man's wrist. I stood weakly in front of Katsuki and squeezed my assailant's wrist tightly. My breath came out in labored huffs as the heat coursed my veins.

I gave my best glare, warning, daring this creep to hurt him.

I noticed Katsuki's wide eyes as my glossed over jades looked at his disheveled form. His hands were balled into fists, knuckles white, and his lips parted slightly. His breath came out in rough labored huffs. All I could smell was him and his sweet scent.

My body rejoiced at his proximity.

"Don't touch my Alpha," I spoke breathlessly right before crumbling to my knees.

***

There was a moment of pause before the man lunged at me again. But before he could get to me, Katsuki was on him in a flash. A snarl leaving his body that had me shaking and mewling in pleasure.

There was no rational thought in my heat crazed state of being. I barely recognized anything happening until the sickly smell of blood was wafting in my face along with my Alpha's scent. My mate.

Before I could lift my head to look around again, Katsuki was there hovering over me with a frantic look in his eyes. One that I had never seen before. Tears were staining his pale skin. Light splats of blood were dirtying his cheek and knuckles. My Alpha protected me.

My body trembled and I blinked a few times before I realized what was happening. For a split second, I gasped and tried to move away from Katsuki. I needed to call the cops and his parents now. But before I could get away from him, he was grabbing my sides to hold me still.

A loud embarrassing moan left my body and I panted from his touch. My eyes glossed over again as sparks ran through my body, pooling in my stomach.

"Izuku!" He cried out and frantically moved his hands around, trying to find where I was hurt. Although he was innocently worrying over me, every brush of his hands was causing waves of lust to roll over me. More slick gushed from my body and I arched my back with a loud whine. Wetness pooled between my legs and I trembled. I can't. Stop. Why?

"S-stop." I whimpered and tried to move away from him again. But he grabbed me tighter and I whimpered. His touch sent lovely little jolts thought my spine. Yet, I couldn't see him. I wanted to see my Alpha. I blinked a few times, trying to clear the haze that blurred my vision.

"Y-you're hurt, Izuku!" Katsuki whined and his bright red eyes were stained with tears from his worry. I whimpered at the sight of my Alpha crying over me. He wanted to take care of me. My Alpha was here.

Finally.

Submit.

Submit.

Alpha.

Mate.

"Izuku, what can I do!?" He frantically looked over my body, clueless to what I am going through.

"What do you need!?" He shouted. His wide eyes were terrified and his breath was shaking in his chest. Don't worry now, Alpha. I'm fine now. I'm fine.

My whole body seized up with another wave of heat and my eyes hazed over again. There was nothing but fog in the room. I couldn't see anything but a haze that surrounded my Alpha and the strong scent of caramel in my face that made me bare my neck in submission. My hands reached out for his blurred form.

"I-I... I n-need..." I choked out as my hands moved along his shoulders and down to his chest. I balled my fists into the fabric in search of him. I grabbed firmly into his shirt before pulling him down over my shivering form. His warmth seeped into my pores. There was nothing in my head other than his scent and the sparks from his skin on mine.

Submit.

Present.

My Alpha.

"I-Izuku?" Katsuki whimpered and I keened happily at the sound of my name rolling off his tongue. I purred deep in my chest while my hands unlatched from his shirt and began to..... wander. I just need... my Alpha.

"I need...." My hands slipped down farther as my eyelids fluttered and shut. Lost in my heat. Everything hurt, I need... I need... Please...

And then I did the one thing that would change my life forever. Something that was horrid. Something that would leave my life and Katsuki's life scared in more than one way for years to come.

I touched him.

My palms rub down on the front of his jeans before I curl my fingers inward, searching, needing, and wanting more from my Alpha. Take the pain away Alpha. You saved me.

"Izu- Ahh!" Katsuki's eyes widened in shock as I grabbed him and he fell back on his butt. He looked at me with terror and confusion in his eyes.

Something about the look on his face snapped me out of my haze and I sat up frantically to look around. My blurry eyes landed on the figure on the floor between my legs. Katsuki was shaking and looking at me like I have two heads. His eyes were wide and his hands were cupped over his groin. His chest was rising and falling rapidly and my eyes widened with understanding. Realization of what I had just done. No... My Alpha is... is... Katsuki? My mate is a -- child?

"Go --" I spoke lowly and buried my head in my clammy palms while I tried focusing on anything but his scent that was filling my senses. Anything but my heat.

"Izu -- " He protested lightly and I snapped.

"No! Get out, Katsuki!" I screamed in frustration with hot tears still streaming down my flushed cheeks. I couldn't believe I touched him. I needed him to get out. I needed him to leave; he had got to just fucking leave. I couldn't be near him any longer. The only thought swimming through my muddled mind was of the monstrous act that I had just committed.

I hurt him.

I hurt my Katsuki.

"Please... Kat... Call your mom. It's an e-emergency... G-go to the neighbors... S-stay away. P-please." I cry and shook my head in my palms.

I'm so sorry Katsuki, so fucking sorry.

I whimpered and flinched when after a few moments I heard the front door slam shut. I shakily took out my phone and pressed the emergency number as I stared at the unconscious male on the kitchen floor.

Chapter Text

𝓚𝓪𝓽𝓼𝓾𝓴𝓲 𝓑𝓪𝓴𝓾𝓰𝓸𝓾

The past 24 hours had been the worst of my life. Part of me was still confused as to what just happened.

After leaving Izuku at the house, I did what he told me to do and ran to our neighbor and called my mom. I couldn't explain much because I was freaking out. I just told her that Izuku went for snacks like we have done handfuls of times but when he came home, some man was attacking him and Izuku seemed to be in a lot of pain. He looked so scared and like he wasn't thinking right. The image of his face had been burned into my mind.

My parents came home within the next hour and by then, the cops were at my house and Izuku had been taken somewhere. I assumed they took him to his own house. I fell asleep as soon as we went home and my parents let me sleep. They didn't bother me with questions yet. Thank Goddess, because I could barely think about it myself.

In the morning, the questions came. I had just made my way to the kitchen around noon and my parents were sitting there. They looked tired. I could feel the tension radiating off them in thick waves that had me nervously rolling my shoulders.

"Katsuki, we need to talk about what happened the other night. I know it must be painful to think about, but the cops are needing your statements from the attack." My father said softly and pulled out a chair for me. My mother didn't look at anything other than the floor for a while. Her face was contorted with stress.

"Okay -- " I took my seat and pulled my blanket around my body tightly. Images of Izuku's pain-filled face flashing in my mind, making me tense up and shut my eyes. Izuku's pain-filled expressions were burnt behind my eyelids and brought such heavy emotions to my core.

"Take your time, son. We just need to know what happened." I sat there for a good while just focusing on my breathing before I began to recount what happened that night. It was fresh on my mind and only made sense that they needed my statements while the event was still recent in my memory.

I started by telling them what happened before he left the house. I told them that I had been tired so Izuku asked me to stay home while he got snacks for our movie night. Guilt washed over me because I knew that I should not have let him go alone. I made sure to tell my parents that as well. I didn't want Izuku going out alone and I had felt like something bad was going to happen all night.

They didn't interrupt me as I told them about waking up to hearing Izuku shouting. I told them that I saw the man hovering over him and telling the details of seeing that Izuku's pants had been pulled down. My mother tensed up when I said this. I was not stupid. I knew that man was forcing himself on Izuku. I knew that if I had not been there that he would have done far worse to my friend.

I might not have known much about what was going on, but the thought sickened me. I told them how I hit the man, and recounted the words that the Alpha had said to me about 'an alpha trying to mate'. My father and mother gave each other a glance that told me they knew something that I didn't. I wanted to ask but it was likely they weren't going to divulge any information to me.

Towards the end, I felt my calm behavior begin to slip and fade. I felt that familiar sting of fresh tears in my eyes and clenched my fists in my lap as Izuku's cries ran ramped in my mind.

"Breathe son -- What happened then?" My father asked me and I let a sob bubble up in my throat. My mother wrapped her arms around me tightly and I took some much-needed deep breaths.

"I -- I tried to help him, mom," I cried out and clutched at the blanket that was wound around me tightly. She cooed at me while rubbing my back soothingly.

"What do you mean, son?" She whispered and I chocked on a held back sob.

"I tried to see where he was hurt, but he kept pushing me away. He wouldn't tell me what he needed; I didn't know what to do! He looked so scary like that, I-I-I didn't know what to do! And then..." I stopped myself and tensed up at the thought of what happened after that.

I told myself that it had to have been an accident. Izuku was in pain and clearly wasn't able to really see right by the way his eyes looked. Absent and void of his usual life and spark. He looked confused and in pain. He had accidentally touched me. That all. There was no other explanation for it. It was an accident. It had to be.

"And then?" My father coaxed and I shut my eyes, willing away the memories. Izuku was my friend. He was my friend. He wouldn't do anything to hurt me.

"He -- t - touched me," I began in barely a whisper but couldn't say anything else. I did, however, hear my parent's breath hitch in their throats and their hearts thrummed rapidly. A low rumble sounds from my father's chest.

"Where?" My father spoke stiffly and when I didn't reply, I could hear my mother's gasp. I quickly jumped in again with a need to clarify. They just didn't understand. Izuku wasn't like that Alpha. Izuku wasn't a monster like that man. He wouldn't -- touch me like that. Right?

"I swear it was an accident, Izuku would never do something to hurt me like that! Izuku was in pain, it was an accident! He pushed me away and told me to leave, he would never hurt me! He would never hurt me! N - Never!" I cried out desperately and let a new wave of tears spill down my cheeks. My mother and father both didn't say anything else. They just held me and let me cry.

I felt like there were things that had been hidden from me, but I couldn't care about that at the moment. I didn't care about it. All I wanted to know was if Izuku was okay. I needed to know that he was safe and that he didn't hate me for telling them. My parents would understand that he would never hurt me like that. My parents wouldn't group him in the same category as that monster. I wasn't worried about what my parents would think about me right now.

I was worried about Izuku.

I was worried about Izuku

𝓘𝔃𝓾𝓴𝓾 𝓜𝓲𝓭𝓸𝓻𝓲𝔂𝓪

These past few days had been the worst time of my life. My heat lasted a full five days. My mother took care of me as much as she could while I was locked in my room for the entire span of those five miserable days.

I was disgusted when my heat had been finally over. My body had craved sexual release and I couldn't even touch myself without thoughts of Katsuki storming into my mind. The memory of his scent flooded my scenes no matter how hard I tried to push the desire down.

I felt like a creep; something was wrong with me. Something had to be wrong with me. No one I had ever heard of got mated to a child. The whole heat cycle I spent scolding myself for the desires I had towards Katsuki. I couldn't control them. I did the only thing I could do to keep the images out of my heat.

I didn't give in to my desires. For the entire week, I didn't touch myself, not once. It was utterly unnatural for an Omega to do what I had done. But it was all I could do to keep myself from feeling like a creep. I couldn't let myself indulge in those kinds of fantasies. My heat made it nearly impossible to ignore. But I tried.

I spent way too much time in my bath filled with scalding hot water and bath oils; it soothed my heat some, just enough for me to not be driven insane with desire. When the hot baths stopped helping, I quickly turned on the cold shower and stood, shivering in the tub and crying while I willed away all thoughts of Katsuki.

After a few days, my mother had been able to get some pills from the doctor that were heat suppressants. Most people refused to take them unless medically necessary because they weren't healthy.

These pills were the strong kind that could almost stop my heat if it weren't for the fact that I was already so deep in it. However, it had been enough for me to not go crazy. But the lingering desires and pain on my skin lasted the full five days. Being an Omega never bothered me before. I had accepted that I was an Omega.

I was doomed to be smaller, weaker, more feminine, and suffer heats. I just never expected it to be this bad. However, it was. This had been worse than I could have imagined. The pain was a deep and overwhelming burn within that pressured my whole body for one thing. My mate.

Nonetheless, I knew when my heat was over. My mind cleared and it was suddenly like I could breathe and think again without sex being the one thing on my mind. Before, I could breathe without feeling like a sick creep.

I couldn't remember much from during my heat. The only thing I did remember was a few hours of that day. I had been attacked by some random Alpha male, I touched Katsuki inappropriately, and Katsuki was somehow my mate.

A barely 14-year-old kid was my fucking mate! A few days passed and I let this information sink in. Although, at that point, I was pissed and in denial. I had been overwhelmingly desperate to know how Katsuki was doing.

The whole mate pull was a curse! I lasted 24 hours before my instincts were screaming at me for denying Katsuki as my mate. I never downright rejected him, but I had not accepted him either and that hurt everything in me.

My heart hurt once I had come to the realization that Katsuki is, in fact, my mate. My stomach felt like I had swallowed nails, ripping me apart from the inside out. It felt as if I had done something horrible by leaving him. I knew that I had done the right thing by telling him to leave, but my instincts were screaming at me.

How a 14-year-old boy could be my mate was just too much for me to understand.

I questioned it for days. But mates were the equivalent of soulmates, predestined matches for each person. Mates were designed to be your perfect match in every way. The Moon Goddess was never wrong with mates. If your mate were to reject you, you would never find another true love. You could never find a new mate, and your body would be in the most pain ever while the bond broke.

Some mates even die from the pain of rejection. If Katsuki was my mate, I wouldn't reject him. But there was no way I can be around him until he is of age. I had already done something horrible to him while I was blinded by my heat.

I couldn't live another four years around him until he turned 18 and could sense me as his mate. Every heat I could go through would put him at risk and I would rather die than hurt him again. If I were to stay off the pills my hear would come once every three months. If I stayed on them my hear would only come once every six months.

Part of me was delighted that such a strong Alpha was to be my mate, another part was on the verge of throwing up every time Katsuki came into my mind.

For his age, he was strong and protective. The way he defended me that night brought pride to my Omegan nature and I was happy that he cared. It was wrong. This had to be some sick joke that the Goddess was playing. The things I did to Katsuki were shameful. It was disgusting. I was disgusting.

After another day passed and it had now been about a week and a half since that day. While sitting in my room, I felt my phone start to vibrate in my pocket. I was receiving a phone call from...

Mr. Bakugou.

My hands began sweating while I stared at the caller ID. I didn't want to answer it, but I did. I answered the phone with a shaky breath and held it to my ear.

"Hello?" I gulped and held my tongue before I could start gushing and asking how Kat was doing. I didn't deserve to ask about him. They were calling for a reason and deep down I knew that they knew.

"Izuku?" The deep voice of Masaru Bakugou rang in my ear.

"Yes, Sir. Speaking," I mumbled and sat down on my bed stiffly. There was a long pause and my heart began thumping rapidly in my chest.

"I would like you to come over today, I need to speak with you." Mr. Bakugou said stiffly before hanging up just as fast. I didn't even get to reply. The only thing on my mind was Katsuki. I kept wondering if he was alright, if he hated me, or if he feared me.

Of course he fucking feared me! I mentally kicked myself at the notion that he could be fine when I had come onto him like a -- well -- a bitch in heat. I groaned and flopped down on my bed, shoving my face into the nearest pillow.

Did Katsuki know that he was my mate, my alpha, and my perfect match? I know that I had to go talk to his parents today, even if they reported me. Or worse, Mr. Bakugou just killed me right then and there.

I needed to come clean and tell them what I did to Katsuki and tell them that their son is my mate. They deserved to know. He was still just a child and I had no say over this right now. No matter how it ended for me, Katsuki deserved to be able to heal. He deserved to be safe, and right now he would be safe without me.

I would never put him in danger again. I would never hurt him again. Never.

I sat in my bed with tears running down my face while I frantically thought up ways to make this go smoother than how it is going in my mind. There was no good ending to this. Either way, I would stay away from Katsuki until he comes to me when he was of age.

If he comes to me.

Chapter Text

𝓘𝔃𝓾𝓴𝓾 𝓜𝓲𝓭𝓸𝓻𝓲𝔂𝓪

The drive to Katsuki's house had me a nervous wreck. It was times like these that I wish I was an Alpha or even a Beta. Since I was an omega, I had an even harder time controlling my emotions. Being the weaker status never really bothered me before, but ever since that night, I hated myself.

My pheromones were choking me in my car. If I rolled my windows down, I would have the whole neighborhood freaking out over my distress.

I chose to drive so I could make a quick escape if Masaru did try and kill me. I had no chance of trying to run from an angry Alpha.

I turned the radio on and took a few moments to calm myself. I knew that if I were to go into there all emotional it would make things worse. I needed to get myself under control before entering the house where my mate was.

When I pulled up to the house, I debated driving off again to give myself some more time to stall. But I knew that this would need to happen no matter how long I ran away from it.

Putting the car in park I ran my fingers through my hair and sprayed some scent masking spray over me in an attempt to cover the distress pheromones that had me reeking of scared Omega. Satisfied that my scent was masked enough not to freak anyone out when I left my car, I slipped out and quickly sent a text to my mom, letting her know where I was and quickly adding an 'I love you' on the end just in case I died today.

Swallowing nervously, I tuck my keys and phone in my pockets and shuffle up to the front door feeling myself grow more and more nervous as I hesitate to knock on the door. I have no idea what to expect, but from the phone call I received, something is wrong, and I can't help but think that they know.

Feeling even more ashamed of myself than ever, I slowly knocked on the door before tucking my hands behind my back. I wrung my hands nervously while I waited. A few moments passed and my heart was hammering as I picked up on the sounds of feet approaching the door.

The door opened revealing Mitsuki Bakugou. She was standing there with her blond hair and striking red eyes that made her look like an older sister to Katsuki rather than his mother.

"Izuku dear, come in." My brain short-circuited for a moment, wondering why she was being so nice to me. She spoke to me like -- like everything was fine. Everything was not fine.

"T-Thank you." I stuttered and forced myself to move. I walked inside the home that I had been in hundreds of times during the past 4 years. This house used to feel like a second home, but as I walked through the kitchen, all I could see were images of me painting on the floor with that man on top of me. All I could remember was the way Katsuki looked at me after I -- violated him.

"We will talk in my office, okay?" Mitsuki asked. Her normal rowdy behavior and loud voice were gone now; only making me more nervous.

"That fine... Umm, how is -- " I stopped myself, not realizing that even saying Katsuki's name out loud right now would burn my throat. I didn't have the right to talk about him right now. Mitsuki tensed up but looked at me with a softness that made me want to cry. I didn't deserve any kindness from her. Maybe they didn't know?

"He is fine, dear. He's not home right now but he is fine." The words were reassuring. I wanted Katsuki to be okay. Even if I felt like shit and was about to be beaten to a pulp by his father, Kat deserved to be okay. I knew that it was only a matter of time before Mitsuki no longer looked at me with any kindness or sympathy.

Walking behind Mitsuki quietly, she lead me as we approached the home office. I could pick up on Masaru's scent. It was a thick Alpha scent that made my knees weak. She opened the door and motioned for me to enter. Mitsuki followed behind me until we reached a table where Mr. Bakugou was seated. Mitsuki took a seat next to her husband, leaving me to take the empty seat on the other side of the table -- facing them both.

It was silent for a while, just the sound of heartbeats and breathing in the air, mixed with my distress pheromones that even the scent masking spray couldn't hide all.

"Dear, we would like to hear from you what happened that night." Mitsuki started the conversation. Noticing how tense her husband was probably made her understand that she needed to speak if we all wanted to avoid sudden death.

I could feel my heart speeding up and my palms broke out in a nervous sweat. I didn't know where to begin to make this less awkward or terrible, so I just told them from the beginning.

I told them about everything. I started with how I had been at the store when I went into heat, and how that man claimed to be an Omega. He said he was helping me get back somewhere safe. I told Katsuki's parents how I went back to their house because it was close. That was when Masaru Bakugou interrupted my story with a sharp glare.

"You brought a stranger back to our house where our 14-year-old son was?" He growled lowly, half-leaning over the desk that separated us. I couldn't stop myself from whimpering while I lowered my head at the dominance. Mitsuki placed her hand on his arm to calm him while I tried to explain.

"I-I was in heat, Sir. I didn't know what was going on -- I wasn't thinking clearly --" I said pleadingly. Mitsuki sighed and patted her husband's arm gently.

"Calm down Masaru." She scolded lightly.

"So, what then?" Masaru gritted out through clenched teeth. His canines exposed as he spoke made me whimper again. The threat was clear.

"He attacked me -- that m - man -- I was weakened by my heat and didn't know what was happening. I still can't remember much other than -- other than K-Katsuki must have woken up and he knocked the guy out before he could do anything serious to me..." I said softly, feeling the tears brimming in my eyes.

Please don't make me say any more -- Please I don't think I can stand to say it out loud. I silently begged the moon goddess to let me live and escape this.

"Katsuki said you touched him." My heart stopped before it broke out in a harsh rhythm, slamming in my chest and making the tears flow freely now. Even if I were to maintain a poker face, my heart would have given it away, and they know. They know.

My tears only streamed faster as a low threatening growl rumbled from Masaru's chest. I whimpered and bowed my head to the Alpha male. It was the smart thing to do if I didn't want to die today.

"So, it's true." He growled, making the hairs on my arms and neck stand up. I trembled in my chair but couldn't lift my head. I was submitted to this Alpha who was so displeased in me.

"Masaru, control yourself. He's just a kid." Mitsuki said, even though she couldn't look me in the face. I know I didn't deserve any kindness after what I had done to their son.

"How could you, Izuku!? How could we let you into our home, only to have you violate our son?!" He growled lowly and stood up, shoving his chair backward. The air was thick with Alpha pheromones and it made even Mitsuki whimper as she tried to settle her husband.

"I-I d-didn't mean t-too!" I desperately try to explain but choked over my trembling voice. I had no idea my heat would have presented that soon after my 18th birthday. Normally heats would show up after making a connection to your mate. But I, of course, already had 4 years of connection with my mate.

The Omega in me knew Katsuki was my mate and had presented to him. My instincts wanted to mate and be marked by our Alpha. My instincts didn't notice age. It didn't care. It was dangerous. It was wrong and I had no control.

"Didn't mean to?! Pathetic! You hurt my son!" He roared and threw himself over the table, knocking me out of my chair and onto my back on the floor. The angry Alpha had me pinned down, snarling in my face as drool seeped from his canines. It left me a whimpering submitted mess on the floor. I tried to free myself only to have a hand come and wrap around my throat causing a loud whine to fly free. It was a desperate cry for help.

"M-Masaru! Get off him! He's a child!"

"He isn't a child! He is 18 now and I am going to kill him!" He snarls, snapping his teeth in my face as his wife tried to talk him down. I clawed at his hands that were wrapped around my throat. I didn't want to die. I just wanted to disappear. I hated what I had done and now everyone had turned against me. I looked over at Mitsuki desperately.

Kill me? He couldn't kill me! It would hurt Katsuki! If I die before Katsuki could feel the mating pull when he turned 18, he could die from the pain of a broken bond! He would feel my death; he would know that his mate had died.

I struggle for air, taking desperate intakes of oxygen. I gasped for breath and tugged at his hands that were pinning me down.

I had begun to feel light-headed and I thrashed around. I had to tell them so Katsuki would be safe. I couldn't let him be hurt or possibly die. If he wanted to reject me, I would let him, but he deserved to know that we were mates before I die.

"S-stop! Y-you c-can't k-kill me!" I gasped as his hand tightened around my throat.

"And why the fuck not?!" He growled while digging his nails into the skin of my throat.

"B-because... AH! B-Because w-we... m-mates... m-mates!" I croaked out before his hands were suddenly ripped from my body. Mitsuki was hovering over me with wide eyes as she tossed her husband off my body. I cried out and clutch at my throat, the air burning as I gulped in deep breaths.

"You are our son's mate?" She asked with wide eyes as my unsettled waters trail over to where Masaru was sitting on the floor with narrowed eyes and shaking hands. I gulped and nodded my head timidly.

"Yes -- Yes I could feel it. When he came into the room, his scent... I-I couldn't think about anything else. When I saw him... I knew it... I never wanted to hurt him or any of you... My heat was so intense... I just wanted my alpha... I-I never meant for this to happen!" I cried out, clutching my shirt over my chest as hot tears fell from my eyes.

"Fuck..." Mitsuki muttered under her breath and squatted down with me. She gently reached out and laid her hand on my shoulder. I flinched but started crying louder.

"I-I am so sorry! As soon as it happened, I stopped, it's like my body rejected what I was doing. I hated it! I hated it; I don't want to hurt him ever again! I will go away!" I look up at them with wild desperation. I didn't want them to think of me as a monster. I wasn't a monster. I cared for Katsuki. I just wanted him safe and would give up everything to make sure he was okay.

"I am leaving for college in a week. I will be gone for 4 years in another state... I will stay away from Katsuki, I won't contact him or anything!" I said desperately dashing away my tears.

"Izuku that is dangerous for you. If you both are mates, you will go crazy from being away from him now that you know he is your mate." Mitsuki sighed with tired eyes. I knew she wasn't happy about this, but the fact that she was taking into consideration my health made me calm down a bit more.

"I can take care of myself... I just want him safe... When he is 18, he can reject me if he wants to, I just want him safe." I whispered and watched as Masaru stood up and walked over to me. His wife on the floor was still beside me.

"Stand up," He commanded and we both stood up. I looked down in submission to the Alpha that just choked me out, not wanting to start another fight that would kill me this time.

"Yes, sir?" I whispered lowly and was not prepared at all for what he was about to say to me.

"You will stay away until Katsuki is 18 years-old. You won't contact him or see him until then. We will tell him that you had to leave for school early and you have no signal where you are at when he starts asking questions, I will tell him that you changed numbers. I don't want to hear from you again." He said lowly, making my eyes fill with unshed tears.

I had suggested this, but it still hurts.

"However, being away from your mate could quite possibly kill you and considering that you dying will only hurt our son, we will send you something with Katsuki's scent on it once a month. This should help you through school so you can still focus. We will keep you updated and let you know that he is safe or if he is hurt or sick. This is all I can do for you and for our son," He said, slowly relaxing as his wife held his hand and nodded in agreement.

"When he is of age, we will tell him that you are his mate and let him make his own choice. We will give him your information when he turns 18 and let him reach out if he wants to. He is an alpha, he will make the right choice for himself and his future pack, whether that involves you or not."

Chapter Text

𝓘𝔃𝓾𝓴𝓾 𝓜𝓲𝓭𝓸𝓻𝓲𝔂𝓪

Moving into my college dorm was a damn nightmare. The school messed up on so many things, I was almost ready to give up and go back home. On top of all that, I was frustrated because I was preening for Katsuki. I was anxious and nervous about being away from my mate.

I had to come clean and told my mother about finding my mate and what happened that night as well. She was not happy with me for putting myself at risk by going out that night alone.

Surprisingly, that was all she had been upset about. She was shocked that Katsuki was my mate and was upset that I had touched him how I did. But she was the first to understand that I was not in my right mind. With that heat being my first as well as finding my mate on the same night, she said it was a miracle I didn't do anything worse.

That thought had me cringing. Before I left for school, I was delivered a package with one of Katsuki's shirts inside. At first, I was afraid to open it, I didn't know how my body would react and I didn't want to have any more bad thoughts about him.

It felt wrong, but my mother being an Omega herself, talked to me about it and told me that I had no choice in who I was mated with. The moon goddess doesn't make mistakes with mates, yet here I am, 18-years-old mated to a 14-year-old.

Well, 15-year-old now. He just had a birthday that I had to miss since I left for school and was not allowed to have contact with him anymore, per our agreement.

It didn't make things any better though. My mom only told me that I should take care of myself and not deny my Omegan nature the comfort of my mate's scent.

I still couldn't open it. I just held it close by.

That was until I almost lost my cool when I got to my dorm and found out that I had a roommate who was an Alpha.

All Omegas had a private room because this school accepts all of the sub-genders and to protect Omegas, they had to have a special sent proof room that could go on lockdown to keep Alphas out during heats. They had messed up my registration and overlooked that I was an Omega. They blamed it on the fact that they didn't see many male Omegas and it was an honest mistake.

I was already tense and now I was thrown in a room with some random Alpha who looked at me like a piece of meat. My mother pitched a fit to the school administrators and they quickly found an empty Omega room where I had to move all my stuff for a second time.

Once mom left and I had finished unpacking everything, things began to settle in for real. I was 8 hours away from home where I would be for the next 4 years of my life. I couldn't even come home for summer and Christmas break or risk the wrath of Masaru Bakugou.

Instead, my mom has a family friend that was letting me stay with them over the breaks and mom would join us for Christmas and holidays. It was not the best situation, but I agreed to do it so Katsuki would be safe and have a chance to grow up before making his decision.

It was a big decision for an Alpha to make. The Alpha's mate would help him lead his pack. The pack normally consists of family, close friends, and sometimes even random people who require an Alpha to help them out.

Sitting in the lightly decorated dorm room, I noticed how lonely it felt. I never get lonely or even homesick. I liked my space but I had plenty of friends that kept me company when I wanted or needed it.

I still had Shoto, who was texting me daily to see how I was doing. I hadn't told anyone about finding my mate, let alone finding out he was a child still. My friends would probably freak out. It was not unheard of to have found a mate that was way younger that one partner. Although that comforted me some, it made me realize just how rare it was and how freakish it made my mating feel like.

Staring at the white package sitting on my dresser, I took a shallow breath as my instincts begged me to open and cling to our mate's scent. But I just couldn't yet.

I was afraid.

I hated how conflicted I felt over my own mate. I knew that my mate would most likely be a male Dominant considering I am a male submissive Omega. It just helped that I was gay, but I was not expecting Katsuki. Of course not.

I was not expecting a child. I was not expecting to put him at risk. The thought made me whimper in my quiet room. I couldn't stop myself from curling up in my twin-sized bed, wrapping my arms around my legs and pulling them up to my chest.

The hollow feeling inside my chest seemed to echo with the sound of my heartbeat. That night I didn't sleep but for a few hours. Classes didn't start until Monday and it was only Friday when I moved in, giving me two days to get settled and meet some of the people in my building.

I met a few people living next door. The hall I was placed on was designated for Omegas. It was kind of messed up that we are segregated from the rest of the building, but it was for our safety.

Biology ruled us all; we just had to comply.

One girl next to my room was named Uraraka. A short Omega with brown hair and a chubby face that made her look really adorable. Her eyes were bright and she wore such a friendly smile that I instantly started talking to her. She introduced me later to her friends, Asui and Mina.

Mina was a female Alpha and it was strange for an Omega to be so close to her with them both being in full maturity. But it was nice to see such a friendship.

Over the weekend, Mina, Asui, and Uraraka invited me along to check out the classroom buildings and check where my classes would be. They were helpful and kind to me, making me feel a bit better. Yet every night I would go back to my room and be hit with a sadness that consumed me with my eyes never leaving the white box sitting on my dresser, harboring Katsuki's scent.

The night before classes began, I had been a mess.

I couldn't sleep and nothing was working. I took a hot shower, sprayed my room with calming pheromone spray, and put on my most comfortable pajamas.

Nothing worked and as the clock ticked on later into the night, I began to get angry. I needed to sleep, I had classes in the morning and I was never one to slack off. I had dreams and goals, I got into my dream school and now I am going to show up a mess because I couldn't sleep?

My body trembled as I lied in my cold room. Yet, I was not shaking from the chill of the air conditioning. I was trembling with frustration. My nature was clawing for control, scratching at the surface, begging me to open that damn box and get our mate's scent.

"Just stop already..." I whimpered to myself. I did not want to smell Katsuki right now -- I mean -- I do, but I don't. I couldn't.

Rolling over in my bed, I buried my face into the pillows and tugged my covers up over my body. It had been almost a week and a half since I was at the Bakugou's house and sealed my fate. It had been 3 weeks since I had seen Katsuki and his scent was fading from my memory.

No wonder my body was freaking out, he was my mate and I was denying myself the comfort of his scent that was right in my damn room.

My body was fighting against for control, so I could go get that box and have that damn shirt. Peeking up from my pillow, I looked over to where the box was at before growling under my breath and then whining in frustration.

This was not fair. I snatched my phone off my nightstand and called my mom. The only person I had that made me feel better about this all. It was late but she always answered my calls. It rang a few times before she picked up. Her tired but worried voice rang in my ear.

"Izuku, honey is everything alright?"

"Mom..." I whimpered and my hands shook while I stared at the package.

"Honey, what's going on? Are you okay?" She asked and her voice was a bit more alert now. I knew she must have been worried about me and I couldn't help but tear up.

"I don't know what to do. My instincts are acting up." I whimpered and my mom sighed over the phone.

"Have you opened that package yet?" She asked gently and I knew she was trying not to upset me.

"No. I don't think I can. I'm scared, mom. I feel so wrong thinking about him as my mate..." I said over trembling lips and she crooned over the phone.

"Honey, maybe not to think too hard about the mating part of your relationship with Katsuki right now. I know your biology won't let you forget, but you need his scent. It's the reason I had to have a hysterectomy when... your father left. I couldn't handle my heats anymore, nor could I keep on wanting to be scented by him when he broke our bond. It was the only thing I could do to survive the break. If I didn't have you, I would have died when he left... I don't want you going through that pain Izuku. Go get that shirt and comfort yourself. You won't survive these 4 years if you don't start accepting your situation. You can't do anything about it until Katsuki turns 18 and makes his own choice, so please son, take care of yourself..."

I stayed silent for a few seconds. I knew my mom had a hysterectomy a while after the separation, I just never knew why. She had all her reproductive organs removed to she wouldn't have heats and she could stop being controlled by her biological needs for a mate that didn't want her.

It hurt to hear about, and the goddess knew that I didn't want to reject Katsuki. I just wasn't ready to fully accept that yet. In my mind, Katsuki was a child, not my mate. He was a child compared to me. 15 was young. Too young. I was 18, an adult. Why did this happen?

My instincts seemed to only see him as our mate; our Alpha.

"Okay, mom... I will try, thank you for talking to me about this all... It's just so hard..." I whimpered and wiped my eyes as I stared at the now blurry image of the package across the room.

"Goodnight darling, get some sleep and let me know how classes are tomorrow. I love you, Izuku." She said softly, making me smile and sighs.

"I love you too, goodnight." I hung up the phone slowly and placed it on the charger before sitting it back on my nightstand. Getting up from the warm bed, I walked over to the box that I have been hiding away for 5 days now.

I picked up the package with sweaty palms and ripped the seal open. I held my breath as I did so.

Reaching in, I wrapped my fingers around the article of clothing inside and hesitated before pulling it out of the box. The black shirt had an image of a skull on the front and dangled from my fingers. I exhaled shakily before taking a small sniff of the fabric, praying that it didn't make me have any weird reactions.

The scent of caramel and sugar filled my nose. It made me close my eyes as a purr rumbled from my chest.

That was okay, I thought to myself. I was expecting that, but so far, no weird reactions.

I inhaled again, deep into the fabric and whined lowly. My body moved on its own and my instincts forced me to take comfort in my mate. My omegan instinct pushed forward while I rushed back into my bed with the shirt clutched to my chest.

Pulling my blankets back up over my chilled body, I pressed my face into the shirt and breathed deeply. I had never noticed how Katsuki had smelt before, now it was the only thing I could think of.

Katsuki's scent comforted my body and settled me. It made it easier to relax, and hopefully, I will eventually fall asleep and get some rest before classes start.

Whimpering I sniff the fabric with hot tears prickling in my eyes. This is so fucked up. I miss him so much yet I hate how I can't stop thinking about him. I wish I could forget him.

Pain erupted in my chest the moment I thought about forgetting him forcing a desperate cry from my lips as I shoved my face into the shirt. No, forgetting him wasn't something I could do. I could only hope these four years would pass quickly and that Katsuki would forgive me for what I must be putting him through.

4 years, I could do that. I could handle 4 years to keep Katsuki safe. I could handle the time apart from him in order for me to get a grip on my life and make something of myself; for us both someday, if he wanted me then.

I could do that. 4 years was nothing. Those 4 summers we spent together went by fast, so this would as well.

I could do this. I breathed deeply into the fabric as deep purs rumbled within my chest. Burying my teary face into the black fabric I whimpered and breathed steadily. I inhaled his sweet scent that had my body lax and warmed.

I could do this.

I hopped so.

Chapter Text

𝓚𝓪𝓽𝓼𝓾𝓴𝓲 𝓑𝓪𝓴𝓾𝓰𝓸𝓾

 

"Happy Birthday, Katsuki!"

My parents both cooed at me with their hands behind their backs. I knew they were hiding a gift behind them as if I were still a child that didn't know about object permanency. But I humor them with a smile and rolled my eyes lightly.

I couldn't help but smile at them though, being thankful for the fact that I had great parents. Over the past few years, they had been really involved in my life when previously they were busier with work than they were with me.

The summer Izuku left for school had been when the change happened within our family. My father began to show just how much of an Alpha he could be when it came to his child. He only recently began giving me more freedom.

I was still pissed that Izuku left without at least saying goodbye to me. I thought we were closer than that. Worse than just leaving without seeing me first, he hadn't contacted me once. I have texted him a lot over the first six months before I gave up. It was too painful to be ignored like that.

In the past, I had run over to Izuku's family home just to see if he would be home around Christmas for Thanksgiving break. But he never was. I tried to get his mother to tell him to call me or text me, but she told me the same thing my parents did; he was at school somewhere that he had no phone access.

I then asked for his address so I could send a letter, but they wouldn't give it to me.

After that, I gave up. It has been 2 years and I officially hated him -- well -- I wanted to hate him, but I couldn't fully let go of all the good times we had together.

I couldn't shake the feeling that something just wasn't right and that everyone was hiding something from me. I knew deep down that Izuku would never willingly leave without telling me goodbye or coming to see me again over breaks. But I also understood that my parents probably had a role to play in his disappearance considering that night.

The past 2 summers I had kept an eye out on his house, trying to see if he would come home; he never did. It was like Izuku Midoriya never existed and was only in my head. But I knew that I had not imagined him over those four years.

"Thanks' guys." Smiling at my parents, I couldn't help but appreciate them for everything they have done for me. I was a terrible child before Izuku came along. Now that he was gone, I was afraid that things would go back to how they were all those years ago -- me being an angry tyrant and not having a life or friends.

As if knowing what I needed, my parents kept me busy with sports and hobbies. They pushed me to go see my friends and stay busy, and now that I turned 16, I would have more freedom. I had gotten my license this morning and now my parents had invited my friends over for dinner and cake.

"We are so proud of you, son. You are growing up into an amazing alpha and we want you to know that we have only ever tried to look out for you, but you're growing up now and we can't keep you around forever." I watched my parents as my good friends Kirishima, Jiro, and Denki sat on the sofa, stuffing their faces with pizza and chips. I had somehow managed to keep them as friends over the years and although I frequently joked about them being annoying, I really enjoyed having them in my life.

Watching my parents, I smirked fondly at their bright faces and watched as they pulled out a pair of car keys from behind their back. My stomach dropped and my eyes widened with excitement.

"No fuckin' way!" I shouted and grinned only to receive a quick smack to my head from my mother.

"Language mister!" My mom scolded me while turning to my father with an exasperated look on her face. She flailed her arms around dramatically.

"Jesus Christ, Masaru where the fuck did he learn to cuss like that?!"I couldn't stop the laugh that left my body as my father just rolled his eyes fondly at her. They have always had such a strong love for one another.

They were perfect mates; many years ago my parents told me the story of how my father found my mother when they were both 18. He had just presented fully and was going crazy over the scent of green tea and lemons. Turns out, it drove him right to my mother's house where she was. Mom had been preening over a strong scent of freshly cut grass that wound up being my father's pheromones.

I had thought this story was adorable when I was younger, but the older I get and the more I am taught about Alpha characteristics and traits, the more I realize how fucked up it all really is. It did not seem fair to have your mate picked for you based on scents and biology. This moon goddess chick seemed to have a sick scene of humor.

"Okay okay, just give me the keys so I can go look at my car!" I grin and wiggle my fingers out for the keys. My father snatched the keys from his wife's hands and then wrapped his arm around my shoulders while leading me towards the garage.

"Yo man, that's sick you got a car!?" Kirishima's big mouth yelled after me. I flipped him off over my shoulder and flashed him a shit-eating grin.

"You lucky bastard!" He mumbled only to have me roll my eyes at him and run off into the garage with my father. I hear him hiss under his breath after me and my father leads me to the garage where a new car was parked beside the family car. I was still chuckling from Kirishima's outburst but sobered up quickly at the shiny black car that looked brand new.

"Holy shit..." I gasped and my father patted my back proudly.

"You like it?" His rough voice made me smile and nod quickly. I was expecting a piece of shit for a first car, but this looked like it was newly driven off the lot. I did not deserve such great parents.

"Jesus, thank you so much." Muttering with a huge smile on my face, my father dropped the keys in my hand and I quickly pressed the unlock button. The headlights flashed with a loud beep sounding in the garage. I grinned like an idiot and rushed into the front seat as my father slipped inside the passenger seat. We spet the following 30 minutes driving around and talking about the car as well as Alpha things such as my plans for my future pack.

I hadn't thought about it too much as I still have two years before I even find my mate. But I know for sure I will ask Kirishima, Jiro, and Denki to join if they would like to. There were no Alphas in my friend group apart from me. Kirishima was a beta and Jiro and Denki had both presented as Omegas. I thought it was strange to find a male omega, but we still treated Denki equally and he was a great friend -- even if he had odd behaviors that only Jiro seemed to understand.

Being the Alpha of our group, I liked to know that my future pack members were strong and had good morals. But that their sub-gendered natures were submissive to me -- and they were.

So, it didn't worry me much about having them join my future pack. I could only hope my mate would be able compatible with me and my friends and willing to accept them as I have. The thought made me laugh under my breath. O course my mate would be submissive to me. I was the Alpha. My mate would be some young Omega that would supposedly be my perfect match, and therefore, they would listen to me as their Alpha.

Walking back inside after the ride in my new car, I was all grins when I flop[ed down on the sofa next to Kirishima who smiled at me and punched my shoulder.

"So, this means you're gonna be driving us to school now, man. No more bus riding or I swear I won't talk to you ever again." Denki now peeked up from where he had been curled up next to Jiro.

The Omegas were always staying close together in their own protective circle. It made me smile. They knew where my loyalties lied and they felt safe with me. To them, I was already their Alpha and they knew to trust me. It made me proud to see them comfortable in my home, they were the only friends I hade left.

"Yeah Bakugou! You have to take us to school on Monday!" Denki giggled as Jiro sats up and pointed at me with narrowed eyes and a twisted grin.

"You have to take us every day! Not just Monday, I know you'll try and find a loophole if Denks leaves it at Monday!" Dumb hair grinned and I rolled my eyes with a shrug before giving a small wave of dismissal to Jiro who was sassing me. The real thing that had me willing to take them every day is the idea of Kirishima not talking ever again. Although it would be nice, I would miss his dumb jokes and his ridiculously loud laugh.

"Yeah whatever, dumb hair." I huffed under my breath.

After dinner, my friends leave and my parents head to bed for the night leaving me flopped on the sofa in the dark living room. The only light was being cast by the TV that had been playing some random show that I never watched.

Sitting alone on special holidays like this had never been good for me. Every time I did, I started thinking about him again and it brought fresh waves of pain as well as anger that was directed towards Izuku. Nevertheless, I still sat there and conjured up images and memories that might have been made on days like this.

I didn't know why I cared so much about him, but I would never forgive him for doing this to me. He had only ruined my faith in people that I called friends. He had my young mind wrapped around his fingers and then tossed me aside.

I would never forget that night where he was attacked in this very room. I would never forget the look on his face as he cried and sent me away. That was the last time I saw him, and his tear-stricken face had been burned in my mind.

I have also never forgiven him for -- for touching me how he did.

Although I knew something was very wrong back when it happened, I defended him to my parents when I told them. No matter how angry I was at him for doing all of that to me, putting me through this kind of pain, I couldn't stop worrying about him.

My instincts would run wild when thinking about him. The need to protect him always came back to me and I knew it's just because the last images I had of him were of the broken teen sitting on the floor with disheveled clothes and stuttering at me for me to leave the house.

That night has haunted me over the past two years. For a while I would have nightmares of that man hurting Izuku while I helplessly stood by, unable to move as I watched that monster make Izuku cry.

Other nights, it was the 14-year-old me that was being pinned down under Izuku. That dazed and crazed look in his eyes while he would be staring at me. Each night I would wake up right as he groped me. I would wake up covered in sweat and tears, unable to catch my breath as ghosts of his hands remained on my skin.

Luckily those dreams of Izuku touching me haven't happened in almost a year.

Yet, part of me knew that it was nights like these where I just sat and wondered about what went wrong and why Izuku left as he did, which made me nervous to go to sleep. Doing what I do every holiday and birthday when my mind drifts off to the thoughts of viridian eyes and kelly-green curls, I shuffled off to the kitchen and rummaged through the cabinets.

Yanking out a half-emptied bottle of Tequila, I took a large swig straight from the bottle before shoving it back in the very back of the cabinet until the next time this happened.

The worst part of this bullshit is that I could never fuckin' forget him no matter how much I tried, and just like all those years ago, I couldn't hate him.

I just hated the way I feel around him; only now that he isn't around me anymore, I hated the way I felt when I thought of him.

Chapter Text

𝓘𝔃𝓾𝓴𝓾 𝓜𝓲𝓭𝓸𝓻𝓲𝔂𝓪

 

"Shit, we forgot it was today!"

Mina growled from outside my bedroom door where undoubtedly, the female Alpha had picked up on my scent.

Over the past two years, I had been taking heat suppressants almost daily. The doctors didn't recommend it, but my therapist authorized it because of my mental state. Almost every time my heat would come around, I would fall into a depressive episode. These pills weren't dangerous when taken rarely or for emergencies only, but I had been on them for almost two years.

I hated myself desperately when my heat came and I would wind up hurting myself unintentionally before my therapist gave me the prescription for the suppressants. Along with the prescription she gave a heavy warning that if I remained on them for too long that I could become infertile.

However, the idea of my reproductive system becoming fried from the chemicals I was ingesting daily didn't make me upset at all. My mother would kill me for being reckless with my system like this while I was still so young.

I was a 20-year-old Omega and in the prime of my life. Statistically, I should be having children within the next five years. But I couldn't even think about that for too long without getting sick to my stomach.

Although I have accepted Katsuki as my mate and frequently enjoyed the thoughts of our reunion, the subject of mating and kids made me uncomfortable. Katsuki's 17th birthday was nearing, and although he had been growing up, I couldn't get the image of the child-Katsuki out of my mind.

Will he ever feel like an adult to me? Or will I always feel sick to my stomach when I look at my mate? When I thought about how our mating relationship has started, I began to realize that it would be a miracle if Katsuki ever developed romantic feelings towards me.

I have had two years to come to terms with our mating. He most likely held nothing but animosity towards me. I knew for a fact that he hadn't been told about our mating. While standing in the center of my room, I listened to Mina and Uraraka whisper outside of my door. My heat should have been starting today. They knew the plan, and they were late.

I only had my heats once every six months now that I have been on these pills. This was only the 3rd heat cycle I've had since starting my suppressants. When I realized that I would have my heats once every 6 months, I knew that I needed to come up with a game plan in order to protect my mental health. My depression always got worse after my heat until I could recover. I seemed to just decline in every way after my heats.

I could hear Mina and Uraraka outside my door discussing how they needed to be strong for me, and fresh tears began to roll down my face. It always happened but I could never stop myself from getting upset.

I was prepared, I knew that it would be happening today just like it did every 6 months. We discussed this, after all. I had needed help with this. When this time came around I demanded that Mina remove all the collected pieces of clothing that belonged to Katsuki from my room.

I had no Alpha to take care of me during this time. Even most unmated Omegas had a pack they belonged to where there at least one unmated Alpha could use their scent and pheromones to alleviate some of the pain.

However, I had a mate out there. I had to endure the pain. It has been that way for a few years now and never gets easier. I have always refused to build my nest with his scent even though I wanted to so desperately. But I wouldn't allow myself to. It was for my own sanity.

Only this time, Mina must have forgotten what today was and I had already begun building my nest absentmindedly. I tried to fight it once I realized that one corner of my dorm room had a pile of pillows, blankets, and a few of Katsuki's shirts. Now, I was still standing in the center of my room and was clutching a hoodie that had been sent last week.

It had the freshest scent of my mate; my Omegan nature wanted to keep this one close by. When my door opened, I saw Mina and Uraraka standing there with a look of sadness and sympathy on the shorter Omega's face while I noticed Mina's eyes zoned in on my nest in the corner.

A territorial hiss left my lips as I rush over to protect my space. Standing in front of my half-completed nest, my eyes flickered over towards Mina whose face was twisted with sadness.

"I'm sorry I didn't remember, sweetheart." The Alpha spoke calmly towards me as if not to frighten me - or piss me off. I had not been fully overtaken by my heat and I knew that I had messed up by building my nest with Katsuki's scent. It would break me down to see my friends tear my nest apart now.

However, I knew what was coming. So, I stepped aside and gritted my teeth together. Every fiber of my being screamed at me to protect my nest from the other Alpha. Mina was only trying to help, but at the moment, I hated her. I hated that she so easily tore my nest apart. I hated that they had to take my mate's scent away from me. I hated myself for being weak. I hated everything. I was still clutching Katsuki's hoodie to my chest and my body clung to the faint scent to my mate.

"J-Just do it already... then get out..." I hissed through clenched teeth I looked away as Uraraka came up and hugged me. They didn't take my hostility personally; they knew what this was doing to me.

The moment I felt Mina disappearing to my nest behind me and I hear fabric moving around, I begin wailing into the Uraraka's shoulder. The whole process lasted about 5 minutes and when Mina had an armful of shirts and hoodies she quickly took them from my room and stuffed them into a cardboard box that would be sitting in her closet until my heat ended.

The hoodie in my arms had become covered in my salty tears and Uraraka never left my side. The Omega's presence during my vulnerability helped me relax, she understood what a nest meant to an Omega.

"I'm so sorry, Izuku... We should have remembered before you got this far into your nesting... I am so sorry..." The brunette whispered and stroked my hair, but I couldn't respond.

Everything hurt, and as I looked back over to my disheveled nest, I whimpered and choked back a broken sob.

It was ruined. My nest was ruined.

Mina came back inside and walked over to me, and although I loved her dearly, I tensed up when feeling the Alpha approached. I had always wondered why she was able to be around me during my heats. She should be going crazy at my heavy scent being released.

"Izuku, let me have that hoodie and we will leave you alone..." Her tone was hushed, and I knew she was asking me rather than demanding. She was giving me a choice so I could keep a fragment of my pride.

If I refused, she would just Alpha command me to hand over the fabric.

I still couldn't hold back the hiss of protest that left my lips, making the female Alpha narrow her eyes at my displayed anger. But she sighed in understanding. She was an Alpha and knew how much an Alpha's scent during an Omega's heat meant to us. Over the past two years, it had become almost impossible for me to find my release during my heats when Katsuki's scent was removed. But that was the point.

I hated having sexual desires towards him so I punished myself by keeping it away and denying my release. I was thankful that Mina gave me a moment to inhale his scent a few times before I reluctantly handed over the hoodie as a pathetic whine slipped my lips.

Mina grabbed Uraraka's hand and quickly drug her out of my room before she shuts the door behind them. Right before they escaped, they pressed the lock system that alerted the school that I was in heat.

The scent lock system activated so people couldn't smell me all over the school. It gave me security and peace of mind for this period of time.

Crumbling to the floor when my door slammed shut, I looked around the room that felt much colder and empty now that my Alpha's scent had been removed. I avoided my nest, as looking at it would just hurt too much right now.

I had never been able to make a nest with Katsuki's stuff before, this being the first time I had gotten that far into nesting before being interrupted.

It felt almost natural that my Alpha's scent would be in my nest. My alpha should be in my nest, but now he was gone, and my nest was ruined.

Knowing that I told Mina to do this for me, I tried not to be mad at her, but it hurt so much to have his scent forcefully removed from my room in my most vulnerable time. However, if his scent was around me, I wouldn't have been able to stop my lustful thoughts towards Katsuki.

Although I have failed at keeping myself from masturbating during my heat cycles, I have managed to keep the images of Katsuki fucking me and marking me to a minimum. It was a challenge to do so. Everything in my nature cried out for my mate. Pathetic chirps and calls for Katsuki filled my dorm room until my heat subsided. I was alone. It had been over two years since eI had seen him or heard his voice. I was falling apart and there was nothing I could do to stop it.

I crawled over to my disheveled nest and tried straightening it out with no motivation to do so. It felt beyond repair now with his clothes missing. With tears staining my cheeks I managed to fix it up enough to keep me comfortable and I crawled inside the platform of pillows and blankets.

Curling up into a tight ball I let loose a fit of sobs that wracked my body until they eventually knocked me out and into an uneasy sleep as I awaited the torture of another wave of heat to hit.

***

When my heat was finally over, the first thing I did was tear out of my nest before running to the bathroom and dropping to my knees in front of the toilet. I vomited as I was hit with the feeling of disgust and guilt. The same guilt that would eat at me every time I finished my heat. I was left covered in sweat, slick, and sometimes cum if I had been able to.

I then took a long hot shower where I tried to clean the essence off my body -- as I did every 6 months -- wishing that my life was different and that I didn't have to continue this painful existence any longer.

Standing in the shower, I let the steam and water clean all the shame and guilt of my body. When I can't possibly stand in the water any longer, I walked back into my dorm room and looked around as a knocking sounded at my door.

Right in time, Mina.

"Izuku honey, I am sitting the box outside your door." Of course, Mina and Uraraka would know that I had finished yet another cycle of my heat. They always seemed to know and brought my box back just in time for me to comfort myself with my mate's scent.

Before Mina could finish walking away, I yanked my door open completely naked and grabbed the box of Katsuki's clothes, dragging them in my room. Slamming the door shut I locked it before yanking out the hoodie that was folded neatly on the top of the pile.

I shook it out and pulled it over my head while finding myself purring deep in my chest as my mate's scent surrounded me, easing my guilt.

The hoodie fell mid-thigh and covered me enough to feel comfortable only wearing this with no boxers. Shuffling over to my bed I crawled under the covers and closed my eyes as I rest my exhausted body.

Every six months this happened and I wondered if I would ever be able to come off these pills and have a normal healthy heat cycle with my mate.

Although Katsuki was a little over a year away from turning 18, I had no idea how he thought of me after our last interaction.

I wondered what he looked like now.

In my head, I only saw a child, and part of me wondered if I only could see him now, maybe my mental health wouldn't be so shit. Maybe if I could see that he no longer looked like that helpless child that I had attacked. I know that the main source of my troubles was traced back to the fact that I had touched him inappropriately during that awful night.

On top of the fact that I had just discovered he is my mate, I had just been sexually assaulted and almost forced to mate with some Alpha while my real mate was in the same house.

My therapist tried to explain it was a fucked-up situation and my body was in a state of shock. On top of the fact that I had just found my mate, I did something stupid that I barely had any bodily function over. She said it wasn't my fault, but who else could I blame?

It made me feel like an uncontrollable monster.

She said my troubles also stemmed from the fact that he was so much younger than me, making every thought of him come out with me seeing him as a child when in reality, he was almost an adult Alpha male now.

When I was not in heat, I liked to think about Katsuki a lot. It soothed my troubled mind when I daydream about a happy life that we could have together. I liked to imagine him coming to find me and wanting me in his life again.

I liked to think about what he looked like now and if he still had that unruly blond hair and ruby red eyes that managed to take my breath away, even when just imagining them.

My body craved to be near my mate, and although I had accepted my situation, most of the time when my heats come around, I all but rejected him just to end the suffering of lusting after someone who I hurt. Someone I couldn't have. Kstuki wasn't mine yet and I had no inkling of a clue that he would ever accept me.

My therapist said it was my body protecting itself when I started refusing to accept that Katsuki was my mate. Even if it was only when my heats would come around.

She said that I haven't forgiven myself for doing what I did and that it traumatized me to the point where I believed that thinking sexual things about my mate during that time of the year was wrong. It had me shutting down and rejecting the very thing that got me in trouble in the first place.

She said it is not healthy, but I couldn't help it. However, I was getting better than I had been. I don't hate my life as much and I can think about Katsuki as my mate without making myself sick.

I daydreamed about what our lives would be like together. My mind often times conjured up happy stories of how he would wrap me in his arms and tell me he would never leave me and that he forgives me for the things I had done.

It eased my own self-loathing when I imagined that Katsuki would forgive me, as I have yet to forgive myself. I have accepted him as my mate but pushed him out of my mind during my heats. I wonder if he would be upset with me for doing that -- if his Alpha side would feel rejected by my subtle rejections to our mate bond when I would go into heat?

Part of me wondered if he would even care about me at all after being away for 4 years. But I tried to stay positive. My Omegan side was preening for him to come and rescue me from this nightmare. I just want to see him again and to know that he is close by, yet my mind screams at me that I will only hurt him again and that he will hate me, that was if he didn't hate me already.

My body felt weak and tired all the time, and the faint scents on the clothes sent to me every month or so had me accustomed to not knowing what my mate's fresh scent is like. I was never around him during his maturity and I was sure his scent would be stronger in adulthood.

My body craved to be scented by him, to beg him to take away the aching that lives on my skin every day I am away from him. But it would take more than our reunion for him to want to take care of me as an Alpha should.

It always hurt, it wasn't natural to go unscented by a mate for so long, and I knew that this next year would be the worst of them as I waited for Katsuki's 18th birthday to roll around.

Until then, I would have to live with what I've got -- a box of clothes and the stale scent of my Alpha's pheromones.

Chapter Text

𝓚𝓪𝓽𝓼𝓾𝓴𝓲 𝓑𝓪𝓴𝓾𝓰𝓸𝓾

 

"Umm, do you want to grab some coffee this weekend?"

Denki stood before me, nervously wringing his hands as his cheeks tinted with a blush that I haven't seen from him before. We had just gotten out of school for the day and like usual, Denki, Jiro, and Kirishima knew to meet up in the parking lot at my car to get a ride home.

Over the past year, this has been the routine. Only lately, Denki had been showing up first or meeting me in the hallways to walk with me.

At first, I thought it was only because he had grown closer to me as he began to come out of his shell, but lately, there had been little things that made me wonder if he thought a little more of me than just his friend.

Now, I was leaning up against my car with my backpack slung over my shoulder, standing with Denki who was a blushing mess and fidgeting nervously. It took me a moment to realize what he was asking, and although I pride myself on being intelligent, I had missed all the signs Denki had been throwing to me over the past few months.

As our senior year was only just starting, and my 18th birthday was only 8 months away, I had never once been on a date nor had I thought much about dating. However, Denki was cute as well as an Omega. I have never had a preference between male or female, I have thought that people were attractive regardless of gender. Nonetheless, I knew I was more attracted to Omegas. Alpha biology made me crave their company. It was rare for an Alpha not to get mated with an Omega.

"Coffee?" Stupidly, I watched him fidget, only just coming to terms that he was asking for a date. Bold move, Omega. I couldn't fight the smirk that pulled at my lips and his innocence was clear by how he stared at the ground and twisted his torso left and right.

"Y-Yeah, like -- like just us?" Denki mumbled and peeked up under his long lashes. He was beautiful, as most Omegas were. Although I couldn't stop the slight nerves that ran through me at the idea of taking someone on a date. It was easy to cover up my insecurities. It was something I had always been good at. So, I turned my lips up in a smirk and quirked an eyebrow teasingly.

"Are you asking me on a date, Omega?" I watched as Denki's face turned bright red, he nods his head quickly and adverts his eyes. I can smell the nerves rolling off his body and the faint scent of arousal making me chuckle and shake my head. I realize I must have been quiet for longer than I planned after a small whimper leaves Denki's lips.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said anything --" Denki took a step back and I just opened the passenger side door and pointed inside. He needed to stop worrying. I might be a tease, but I was just as nervous as he was. I don't know if I liked Denki more than a friend, but a date wouldn't hurt. Plus, it would be nice to experience this type of thing.

"Shut up, Denks. Get in the car so we can get everyone home -- and I never said no to the date, but we have to get everyone home before we can go on that date." I smirked and watched as Denki rolled his plump lip between his teeth. He quickly slipped into the passenger seat. I shut the door behind him and walked around to the driver's side right as Kirishima came running towards us with that same grin he always had. Jirou was trailing behind slowly and shaking her head at his behavior.

Not being able to fight off my smile, I shook my head while rolling my eyes.

"About time, idiots. You keep me waiting again and I will leave your asses to walk home." Kirishima stopped beside me and patted my shoulder while tilting his head to the side and making his hair fall into his face.

"Awe, man you wouldn't leave us behind. Don't play all tough Alpha on us!" Looking into the car, Kirishima noticed Denki already was seated in the front seat and frowned.

"You gave my seat away, man! You're replacing me!" He whined and Jirou smacked his arm. She huffed and flopped into the back seat, giving a smile to Denki. They had always been close; the Omegas seemed to always find each other and take comfort in being around others of the same sub-gender.

"Tsk, whatever, just get in the back so we can leave."

Pouting, the redheaded beta flopped down beside Jirou and dropped his bag on the seat between them. As I drove out of the parking lot, the group began chatting away about their day as well as the upcoming senior year. It didn't surprise me that they were excited to graduate. I seemed to find a good group of friends that all cared about school and their education.

I was planning on going to college to get a degree in engineering. Kirishima wanted to be an animal behaviorist. Denki wanted to study biology, and Jirou wanted to be a graphic designer. We all had our goals in life, and thankfully we all had discussed the fact that we wanted to stay together after graduation.

They seemed to be waiting for me to mark them as pack members, but I haven't brought it up as it was common for Alphas to have their mate's approval over pack members. Although I was anything but traditional, I still liked the idea of having my mate beside me when we claimed our pack.

The pack would be family, not just mine, but my mate's as well.

***

The next day I had been preparing for my first date. That felt strange to even think. The word 'date' rattled around my mind as a foreign object that just didn't make sense to me. I told Denki I would pick him up at 5pm for our coffee date. I found a cute coffee bar downtown that seemed to be just the kind of place I would take someone on a first date. Even if that person was just Denki. I couldn't see myself dating him, even if he was cute and seemed to have a thing for me.

My parents didn't seem worried about the date; however, they did give me a brief warning about having sex with someone other than my mate and the damage it could do. That had been a shocker. I wasn't prepared to have that speech.

I wasn't stupid; I knew that fucking around with a mate out there wasn't smart. If for some reason, my mate was already of age, they would be able to feel the betrayal and know right away that I had been sleeping with someone else. The physical and emotional pain that type of betrayal causes could be devastating to one's mate.

After their quick warning, they lit up and told me to have fun and treat him nicely. They knew it was Denki who I was taking out and thankfully they always liked him and the others. So I knew they wouldn't have a problem with my choice of a first date.

I, on the other hand, was nervous and unsure of what I was getting myself into. Denki had been a great friend for so long and now he was developing feelings for me. I was flattered but worried about our friendship. If this continued and I found my mate, I would never want to hurt him or make him feel used.

After the date tonight, I should clear some things up with him. I like him, and he is attractive, but I don't have any romantic feelings towards him. If he is okay with that and still wants to hang out and maybe go on dates, I wouldn't mind going out with him or even having a friend with benefits type thing going on.

I am an Alpha with needs, and he was an Omega that was coming onto me. If I don't fuck him it would be fine. As long as he understood that I don't plan on the relationship turning romantic.

It is common for unmated Alphas to tend to unmated Omega's needs. Maybe this was Denki's way of saying that he is nearing maturity? From what I had learned about Omegas from school and the two that were in my friend group, it was common for Omegas to begin feeling more and more sexual tension and desire towards the time that they will turn 18 and become able to sense their mate.

If the Omega had already made a connection with their mate before their 18th birthday, it would send them into heat sooner than others. Mates trigger each other's heats and ruts to bring the two together and complete the mating process. Or so I had been told.

If Denki was suffering, as his chosen Alpha, I wouldn't have a problem attending to him since we both were unmated. I shook my head at the notion. This shit was too damn complicated to be thinking about before my first date.

Rolling my eyes, I tugged on my shoes and give myself a quick glance over in the mirror before running downstairs and to the garage.

"Have fun and be safe!" My mom called after me and I just waved back as I am already running slightly behind from my earlier wandering thoughts. The drive to Denki's house didn't take too long and before I knew it, we were driving downtown towards the coffee bar.

Denki looked cute, his hair was braided on the top to keep his blond locks out of his eyes and he is wearing skinny jeans with a buttoned-up orange flannel. He is nervous, I can smell it, but I keep my comments about it to myself as I am looking forward to this date.

When we arrived, I was a perfect gentleman. I opened the car door for him and held the door to the cafe for him. I even pay for our drinks and food. Denki was adorable through the whole date, blushing and smiling at me every chance he could get.

Before too long we were sitting closer together and I was picking up on his pheromones. He smelled like spicy candy -- cinnamon mixed with sugar. His cute blushes and innocent touches had my instincts howling in delight. I had never felt those sensations before. The feeling of being wanted by a potential mate had me interested in this boy, even though in the back of my mind I knew he wasn't my mate. But the excitement was rolling off us both in thick waves.

His scent wasn't what I wanted, although it had been attractive, I knew it wasn't right.

As the date came to an end, we had been sitting in my car outside his house and he nervously fiddled with his fingers. It was dark outside and with my heightened senses, I could still see his blush and the way he kept darting his eyes at me. He had gone quiet and I knew it was now or never.

"I think we need to talk, Denks." Much to my surprise, he nodded and sighed in relief. I turned the car off and shifted in my seat to look at him better. He looked nervous but calmer than he had been. I wasn't sure if that was unnerving or comforting.

"I had a great time with you tonight, but I think you and I both know that we aren't mates. Although your scent is attractive, it isn't what I want, there is something in the back of my head telling me that you aren't my mate. I don't want to hurt your feelings, I like you a lot, you have been my friend for so many years... But I don't want to continue doing things like this if you are expecting romantic feelings out of me."

I couldn't help the slight blush that rose to my cheeks and I watched Denki nibble on his lip. He didn't seem hurt by my words at all. If anything he seemed relieved and his body relaxed further. I cast a questioning glance in his direction and watched as he turned towards me.

"Bakugou, are you my Alpha?"

Denki's words made me pause for a moment. I thought of myself as his Alpha -- I think of Kirishima and Jirou the same. I wanted them to be pack one day, so I nodded my confirmation.

"I think of myself as yours, Kirishima's, and Jirou's Alpha. I want you all to be pack someday, but I am waiting for my mate." Denki nodded and looked up at me shyly. I could now smell his scent change. The nerves were gone, and he relaxed. His body emitted waves of comfort and arousal that had my instincts kicking in. His pheromones were teasing my drive for the chase. His scent enticed me to pursue him. The Omega was aroused by me, and my instincts loved that.

"I know you aren't my mate, but I don't trust anyone else and... I like guys... I wanted to see if we got along outside of the friend group because I wanted to know if... You'd... take care of me during my heats if I get them before I find my mate. I turn 18 next month and I can tell that my body is preparing for my first heat. I don't know if I have met my mate yet, but I am scared that I will have to go through that alone. I'm not asking for sex, I know that we aren't mates and that would be bad for our mates, but I know I will need an alpha around me to ease the pain. Your scent, and -- service -- would help me..."

I st with wide eyes, looking at Denki as I feel pride begin to swell inside my chest. Although I knew this situation was normal among packs with unmated members, I was shocked and pleased that Denki thought of me as his Alpha and trusted me with this request. I never believed that I would have such an amazing pack.

"I understand, I am glad we are on the same page regarding us not being mates as I am waiting for mine. I plan to mark you all as pack once I find my mate and let them approve of you all, and if my mate is anything the way I hope they are, they will love you all as much as I do. So, to answer your question, I will gladly take care of my pack in their times of need, including your heats if you haven't found your mate."

Denki smiled softly and nodded his head; I couldn't help but fondly watch him. I had grown to love my friends dearly and as their Alpha, I would do anything I could for them. The way a good Alpha should.

Reaching over, I gently stroked his cheek and listened to him purr while he closed his eyes. Thick waves of arousal rolled off his skin. His scent glands leaked with the sweet pheromones, making my eyes dilate. I couldn't help but inhale deeply. The action not going unnoticed by the Omega who was now watching me with dark eyes.

"Come here," I growled lowly and watched as Denki quickly unbuckled his seat belt and climbed into my lap, straddling me with his back to the steering wheel. It was a tight fit but he was so small that he ended up nestled perfectly against me.

I could feel him pressing closer to me but refraining from doing anything. He knew not to assume he could touch me without my permission as he was not my mate. However, he was my Omega. He was my pack.

"What do you need, Denks?" I trailed my fingers through the hairs on the back of his head, making him mewl and bare his neck in submission. He felt good pressed up against me and it heated my flesh at every point of contact we shared. I could feel myself melt into his body while pulling him tighter against me. Denki let a soft whine pass his lips and his hips wiggled in the excitement that I couldn't help but notice.

"I -- I need -- Umm, can you kiss me and -- and scent me?" I hummed lowly at his request but nodded and curled my finger under his chin, bringing his lips to mine and capturing the plump flesh of his lip between my teeth. I tugged it gently before pressing my mouth back to his, earning a soft keen from the Omega in my arms. I have kissed people before. Not many, but it was almost unheard of for Alphas to not fuck around before meeting their mate.

However, I may have kissed a few people, but I have never, and will never sleep with anyone other than my mate.

Placing my hands on his wrists, I rubbed my thumb into the scent glands there.

My instincts proved to be trustworthy as everything in me forced me to stay away from his neck. That type of scenting would be for my mate and my mate only. As I pressed and rolled my thumb along his wrists, he arched his back as his scent was released into the air around us along with a loud moan from the Omega in my lap.

I released my own scent into the air ad I rubbed his wrists along mine, scenting him and calming his instinct-driven need to be claimed. Pulling my lips away from his bruised ones, I gently placed him back into his own seat, knowing that was all he needed to calm down. He was now scented and would be comforted knowing that others would leave him alone. He now wore the scent of an Alpha.

Sniffing the air, I was pleased that the scents filling my car were ones of pack and not lovers. I hummed lowly in delight knowing that I have scented my first pack member and had made it perfect for Denki.

"Thank you, Alpha..." He spoke shyly while looking over. I saw a soft and satisfied smile on the blond's face and gentle purrs rumbled from his chest. He sat calmly with a happy aura around him.

"This means a lot; I wanted to be part of your pack and knowing you accept me and already think of me as pack -- Well, it's comforting, and now people will know I am proudly part of your pack. I can't wait for you to meet your mate so we can all be family!" Chucking I nodded and leaned over, gently pressing a kiss to Denki's lips once more before patting his thigh.

"I will do my best to take care of my pack, and I can't wait to find my mate as well. Now, hurry on inside and explain to your parents why you reek of my scent before they think the worst. I am sure they will congratulate you on finding a pack. Now I guess I need to talk to the others and scent them as well."

Denki and I both chuckled before he hopped out of the car, waving to me as he ran into his house with an excited smile.

Sighing to myself, I pulled out of his driveway and thought to myself about how I only needed to scent my other friends now until I could mark them when I found my mate. I knew they had been waiting for me to come to them over this matter, they were showing their respect and not pushing me towards a decision.

I truly had the best friends an Alpha could ask for.

They are all I have left. My family. My pack.

Chapter Text

𝓘𝔃𝓾𝓴𝓾 𝓜𝓲𝓭𝓸𝓻𝓲𝔂𝓪

 

Senior year was killing me slowly, but somehow, I had managed to pass all my classes with good grades and maintain a somewhat decent social life. However, my physical health was on the decline. This heat I had last endured had proven just how much damage I have been doing to my body by suppressing my heats -- as well as being away from my mate for the past four years.

Mina was panicking. My screams were piercing and although the dorm rooms were mostly soundproof, Mina's Alpha hearing picked up on my agony and was frantic. I needed an Alpha around me - yet Mina was not able to help me.

I was used to her scent and although she was an Alpha, she had recently marked and mated. Her scent would do nothing for me now. Plus, her scenting me would make not only her uncomfortable but her mate as well.

After two days, the school nurse had come to see me. I had been told multiple times that what I was doing to my body was unhealthy over the past four years. Pumping my body full of heat suppressants must be causing damage, yet I wouldn't survive my heats if they came every 3 months like normal.

Although I have a mate out there waiting for me, I had been living a mateless life. The fact that I had spent 4 years away from Katsuki was taking a toll on my body and mind.

Thankfully, I had my good friends, Mina, Uraraka, and Shinso by my side -- most of the time.

I met Shinso a few months ago when I went into my most recent heat cycle. This one had hit with a brutal force that messed with me in more than just my usual physical and emotional pain. When my heat hit, I was in agony. Nothing that had previously made it bearable had been working.

***

"Mr. Midoriya, I am telling you this in all seriousness, I am not sure how much more your body can take of this kind of abuse..."

The university nurse was in my crowded dorm room. Mina and Uraraka both were standing close by as I sat in a pool of my own sweat and slick. This was the last thing I wanted right now. Although I had been able to think clearly - something I have managed to take control of over the last 4 years of fighting my own biology - I was still struggling to bite back the sobs.

"I know -- God I know this isn't healthy, but I have no choice!" I groaned and tugged my blanket up and around my chilled yet somehow still overheated body. It was not natural for me to be like this, but it was all I knew. It was all I could do while Katsuki wasn't with me.

"Son, you need to come off the suppressants. I know we have spoken about your situation, but this is only going to make you worse. How do you think your mate will feel when you can't have children someday?"

Ouch.

Flinching back at her words, I knew it was the truth that I need to hear. I had heard it before and will probably hear it again before I see Katsuki again. His 18th birthday was only 2 months away and it couldn't come fast enough.

"I know, just -- Fuck, please help me?"

Shaking in my skin, my eyes are bloodshot, and my skin is dull yet flushed at the same time. I had tried everything to calm my heat symptoms own my own, hot baths, oils, I had even tried pacing my room to tire my body out.

Nothing was working anymore. After the first 24 hours, I had given up already in a fit of pain that I had never experienced before. Remembering how my body arched and ached for Katsuki while I had touched myself, only brought shame to me now. However, it was my last resort. I had given up fighting my urges -- I wanted relief from the pain.

"What can we do?" Mina's voice barely broke me out of my own head. The nurse shook her head and sighed before looking around the room.

"Does he have any alpha friends that are unmated? Maybe they can scent him for now, it will only be temporary, but it should sooth some of the physical pain. However, he won't like being scented by anyone other than his mate, it's his only choice." Uraraka whimpered from the corner of the room, her eyes blown wide at the sight of me. I know I looked rough, but I keep telling myself that I would never have to suffer through this kind of pain again. Because in 2 months Katsuki would come for me. I had to have faith that he would, at least.

"Shit, I had a feeling that would be our only option..." Mina cursed and I could tell she was agitated; her mate bond was fresh and being so close to an Omega in heat was making her uncomfortable. It was almost repulsing to her now that she had a mate.

"Is there anyone you know of that would be willing to help?" The next thing I know, Mina was leaving the room as I hit another painfully harsh wave of heat. The room was filled with shrills that I had my groaning and covering my ears. I had not realized that the screams were coming from my own lips. Along with the shaking and sweating, more slick was wetting my thighs and I clawed at my legs - digging my fingers into the flesh trying to ease the burning. The nurse had cold rags pressed to my forehead and chest, cold packs behind my neck as well, trying to cool my body temperature.

Almost 20 minutes later, Mina came rushing back into the room with another person trudging in behind her. The door slammed shut again making my eyes snap open as I breathed in the new scent.

Alpha.

The indigo haired Alpha stood stiffly as he breathed in sharply. My scent was reeking through the entire room. An involuntary hiss left my body as I pulled the covers up higher to hide my body. I didn't want another male seeing me in this state. I was vulnerable and have a mate of my own.

"Who... are you?"

I growled and stared at Mina accusingly. The female Alpha gritted her teeth and softened her eyes, a knowing and understanding look graced her features. She has a mate and could barely be in the room with me with how thick my scent was right now. How could she want me to comply with another Alpha scenting me while I had a mate?

"This is Shinso, hun. He is a biology major, he studies omegas and can control himself. You need an alpha to scent you, he was willing for research but he has yet to find his mate so he can do this for you. He can help you because I can't, love."

It hurts. Everything hurt.

Images of being pinned down by some strange Alpha while he forced his hands all over my body began to resurface. There was a reason why I only had female friends. I had been surprised that I was even able to make friends with Mina, considering she was an Alpha as well.

Being held down while some Alpha tries to force himself on me left mental scars that still affect me whenever I am around an Alpha I didn't know. Now I was in heat and a strange male was here to scent me, and my heart thumped wildly in my chest.

My head snapped to the side when Mina suddenly crouched down beside my bed, face scrunched up, and eyes soft with emotion.

"Izuku, he won't hurt you. We will stay in here the whole time to make sure nothing can happen; he just needs to scent you at least once a day and you should feel better. Can you do that, love? For us? For Katsuki?" His name perked my ears up but causes a pained whine to slip my lips. My eyes flickered over to the tired-looking Alpha by the door. His eyes were relaxed and curious -- he really wasn't affected by my heat at all?

"Okay." Whispering, I nodded my head and closed my eyes, willing the pain away along with all thoughts of how this oddly felt like cheating on Katsuki. Even if he didn't have a clue about our mating. However, I knew that he at least hasn't been sleeping around since I left. I would have been able to feel his betrayal on our bond; I am thankful that he hasn't unknowingly put me through that type of heartache. I couldn't handle that pain on top of this.

Not that I could judge him for it if he had unknowingly betrayed me. We have no relationship - only a faint bond that was formed way too quickly before I had to leave him not a week later. His 14-year-old self most likely left confused and hurt by my actions.

Shinso made his way over cautiously and began to speak soothing words to me, explaining every touch he makes along my wrists almost medically. He explained what he was doing as I fight back tears of both pleasure and pain. His touch both soothing and unwelcomed along my skin.

Yet I knew that it was working as his scent glands begin releasing along my wrists and he coaxed out my own scent while rubbing them together. Gritting my teeth, I fought back the small keens of pleasure that rolled through me while the scenting took place. Shinso was professional, calm, and relaxed as he scented my overheated body.

Soon, the calming effects took place, leaving my body limp and trembling on my bed. Shinso told me that I did well and that he would be back tomorrow. I vaguely remembered hearing Mina and Uraraka come over and tell me goodnight before my eyes closed and sleep took over.

The next 3 days were the same. I woke up drenched in my own sweat, barely made it to the shower before I sunk to the bottom of the tub as warm water sprayed down on me. I might have managed to have a very painful orgasm before I wobbled back to bed and wait for Shinso, the nurse, as well as my two friends to come to check on me.

I am not sure how much more I could take of this.

***

That had been one of the worst times of my life other than the night of my first heat. My body was still recovering a week later. I had trouble keeping down food and my sleep schedule was nonexistent.

However, I had seemed to hit my peak. The worse was over and my body began to relax after 2 weeks. I was eating normally again, sleeping better, and catching up in my classes.

The thought of being reunited with Katsuki caused me anxiety, but I was excited as well. Knowing that soon the pain that always lingered on my skin would be sated. Thoughts of finally being able to come home and be with my mother while building my relationship with Katsuki made it all seem worth it.

My brain only rarely conjured up the horrid images of Katsuki rejecting me, or worse, just never contacting me and ignoring me completely.

I did all this for him, I only hoped he understood how much it hurt me leaving him behind. I had only been told minor things about Katsuki's life while I have been away. The Bakugou family would only send an article of clothing with a short message that told me how he was doing that month.

I had been told when he broke his arm roughhousing with some other Alphas at school. I was told when he got the flu sophomore year of high school and when he got his first job. Knowing that my mate was still living a normal life made me happy, it comforted me when I was feeling low.

I could only hope that he gives me a chance to get to know him again and that he could forgive me for all the shit I put him through. I wanted nothing more than to make my Alpha happy and give him the life he deserved. has been Lately, my Omegan nature had been preening for my mate's affection and love, making me wonder if Katsuki would ever be able to fall in love with me.

I was not in love with him yet, more so in love with the idea of us and the future we could have. Nonetheless, I would wait for him to discover my devotion to him when he would be ready for me.

"Please, Katsuki, I'm not sure how much longer I will survive being apart from you much longer," I whispered to myself.

Knowing Kat was my mate brought me comfort. He would feel the mating pull. We were soulmates predestined to be together by the moon goddess before we were born. As long as he doesn't reject me off the bat, he would eventually come to terms with our mating and hopefully fall in love with me as I plan on doing with him.

My body and soul were already desperate for his care after so long of this suffering by myself. I needed my mate. I needed my Alpha.

I may be older, but Katsuki would always be my Alpha.

Chapter Text

𝓚𝓪𝓽𝓼𝓾𝓴𝓲 𝓑𝓪𝓴𝓾𝓰𝓸𝓾

 

This birthday was probably the most meaningful birthday an Alpha could have; 18 was significant for many reasons. However, since I woke up this morning, I have felt sick to my stomach. At first, I thought it was nerves about my big day, but now it's dinner time and I still felt like there were marbles rolling around in my stomach.

Kirishima was to wish me happy birthday, as my best friend he took it as his personal job to break into my house at the ass-crack of dawn to wake me up with his chompers in my face. He was lucky that I had some self-control because being woken up by that idiot was not on the top of my list of birthday activities.

Nonetheless, he made it up to me by taking me out to breakfast before we went back to my house were the rest of the crew had shown up. Jiro, Denki, and Kirishima all surprised me with a day packed full of fun and food.

My parents didn't mind that I spent my day away from home, their only request was that I have dinner with them tonight to celebrate. They had wished me a happy birthday and my father almost teared up with the pride and adoration he had shown towards me this morning, it was too much emotion for one morning.

I spent my day being spoiled by my friends; our relationships had bloomed into something stronger ever since that night with Denki when I admitted that I wanted to mark them as pack.

The discussions we had as a group after that was serious but pleasant, they all agreed with Denki and already considered me their alpha. Jirou was quite shy about the whole thing, she never felt as close to me as the others, but I didn't blame her for her hesitance.

Sometimes the omegas bond more with the alpha's mate rather than the alpha.

After the discussion, I proceeded to scent each one of them, nothing like the hot make-out session I shared with Denki after that night out together. With the rest of the group, it was almost ritualistic and traditional. I had scented their wrists, mixing our scents enough for them to feel closer to me, for us all to feel closer.

I would have bitten their wrists and marked them as pack, but like I told Denki, I want my mate's approval of our pack. They are more like family after the marking. Our children will grow up together. Denki, Kirishima, and Jirou will be the aunts and uncles of my pups. My mate deserves to have a say in that.

We all bonded more after the scenting happened; however, it was quite a chore to keep scenting them each at least once a week. The inconvenience was minor compared to the bond we all felt from it.

"Bakugou, tell me!" Kirishima slapped his big hand over my back, ripping a sharp growl from me as he only grinned wildly back. He had never been afraid of me; the idiot knew I loved them all and frequently used that against me.

"Tell you what, dumb hair?" The bastard chuckled and ran his fingers through his own shitty hair before running in front of me and stopping, blocking my pathway and forcing me to stop walking. The others are somewhere in the mall, Denki and Jirou joined at the hip as always.

"Yanno, have you been able to feel them yet?" It didn't take a genius to know what he was talking about; he was asking about the mate pull. It had been worrisome when I had been out and about all day and still couldn't pick up on the pull or their scent.

Shaking my head, I give a silent look towards my best friend, letting him know that I really don't want to talk about it right now. It wasn't worth freaking out about, my mate was out there somewhere, and I will find them when they are ready.

"Okay okay, man. Just so you know, I am always here if you need to talk." Rolling my eyes, I flashed a smile at him. However annoying he might be most of the time, he was a great friend and I am blessed to have him close by. Nevertheless, I still didn't want to dwell on unhappy thoughts on my birthday.

For the rest of the day, my friends drug me around the mall, a nice restaurant for lunch, downtown, and even to the movies. By the time dinner was rolling around, we were all tired. I sent the guys home with a forced group hug before I drove myself home to have dinner with my parents.

Today has been amazing as was only the beginning of my adult life. Turning 18 for wolf-sifters - who don't even shift anymore - was a huge deal. It was signaling adulthood, maturation, the finding of one's mate, and the beginning of one's own life.

For an Alpha, it was even more important. I can claim the title of pack Alpha, I can begin my own path, I can move away from home and no longer am under the rule of my parents. I am now my own person, my own Alpha.

Arriving home, I park in my usual spot before sauntering inside, discarding my shoes by the door and following my nose to the kitchen where my mother has made my favorite meal. Spicy Dragon Curry.

"I'm home," I call out, knowing that they have already heard me, if not smelt me, come inside the house. Walking into the kitchen I smiled at my mom who was rummaging around the cabinets for spices and seasoning, dashing them into the pot where the delicious sauce was stewing. She turns to me with a wide smile and points to the table.

"Sit down, your father will be down shortly. How was your day, honey?" Flopping down into my designated seat at the table, I leaned back and yawned. Today has worn me out, I am not big on social gatherings and today had put me at my limit for people interaction.

"It was nice, the guys made it their life's goal to spoil me today." I grin, unable to hide my adoration for those losers. My mother only scoffs and huffs an affectionate laugh as my father comes downstairs and sits at the table, an odd yellow envelope in his hand.

"Well your friends adore you, are you planning on making them pack?"

My mother knows, she always does, even if we don't talk about these things a lot. They don't pry into my personal life, they haven't since I turned 16 and started going out on my own more. I know they are, but I am an alpha, I make my own rules.

"I plan on it once I find my mate. Their approval means something to me, you know?" Shrugging I slouched back and folded my arms over my chest as another yawn escaped my lips. I noticed my father's nervous eyes, an emotion I was not used to seeing from my father. I hesitate to ask what the reason behind those nerves was, but it wasn't my place. He was an Alpha as well if he wanted my help he would ask.

Mom brings our filled bowls of curry over to the table and my mouth waters at the aroma. This smell bringing back memories of long summer days and take out curry, with freckled skin and viridian green eyes.

A strange pain fills my chest as Izuku's face pops up in my mind, I quickly shake my head. It has been too long since I had last thought about him, his face only bringing up emotions and feelings that I had buried long ago.

Long gone was that scared little boy whose source of fear was in what those pale hands did to me. I wasn't weak, yet that one action made my life turn upside down. He was sick, and I couldn't hate him, so I buried the memories of him along with the pain.

"I'm glad you had a good day, son." My mother's hushed tone broke me out of my own head. I brushed my slightly messy hair from my face and began digging into my mom's homemade curry. I am sure going to miss home-cooked meals like this when I eventually must leave home.

Dinner went by quietly, the occasional small talk about our days mingled with the silence.

That was until my mother broke the small talk and began to let her smile fade from her face, her eyes dimming the once bubbly fire that hid in her ruby eyes. I had gotten my eyes from her, and as I have been told before, people find our eyes to be passion-filled, an easy window to our souls.

"Son, we need to talk to you about something important." Her worried tone had me more awake and alert than I had been, although the curry filling my stomach has me ready for sleep.

"Okay...?" I hummed and my eyes dart over to where my father was sitting, fiddling with the large yellow envelope, his eyes downcast and nervous.

"It's about something that happened a long time ago. We need you to understand that what we did back then was to protect you..." Looking back to my mother, she spoke while her eyes glazed over with some type of emotions I can barely recognize, the pain was obvious in her voice. My father sighs, bringing my eyes back towards him. My confusion only growing at their serious looks, my stomach once again begins rolling with what feels like nerves.

"Okay you guys, just spill it. It can't be that bad, whatever it is, I can handle it." I rolled my eyes while I huff my annoyance. Folding my arms back over my chest I narrowed my eyes at the envelope my father still clung to.

"Right..." My father finally spoke up and I looked him in the eyes, my curiosity only peeking as the seconds tick by.

"That night when... Izuku Midoriya was... attacked, do you remember that night?"

Flinching, I recoil at the images that rush my head. The pained whimpers from the boy on the floor, who was only my age now at the time, rang in my ears. It was painful to hear back then; it feels worse now. My stomach burned with emotions and I quickly clutched at the fabric over my torso.

"Yeah... I remember." Nodding, my father sighed as pain filled his eyes. What has got them so worked up? I knew that they were scared for me, I could have seriously gotten hurt when I attacked that grown alpha. I also know they were worried about what I had told them about Izuku touching me, although I never told them where I knew that they knew.

"Katsuki, you don't know the whole story... Nor do you know everything about Izuku. When... that night happened... and we found out the truth, we had to do something to protect your childhood - your innocence..."

His last words where barely audible if not for my advanced hearing. I could feel my heart begin to stutter behind my ribcage, my fists clenching under the table. Why are they bringing up such bad memories on my birthday?

"Go on." I managed to hiss through clenched teeth.

"Izuku... he wasn't a -- a beta-like he told you... He's an Omega." I swallowed thickly, my mind racing. How had I not noticed that before, his soft features, short stature, and lean body? On top of that, his scent was sickly sweet and heavy. Even as a teenager I could pick up on it, he smelt strongly of strawberries and cream.

My stomach clenched and I griped my fingers into my shirt above my stomach, my mother sees my reaction and her eyes shed a few tears. Why was she crying?

"We are so sorry that we put you in that position where he could hurt you as he did..." My mother's voice was broken and low, making me tilt my head in confusion. Do they blame themselves for Izuku's actions? They shouldn't -- that had been all his fault.

"Stop... I don't blame you guys for... that. It was all his fault, he did that to me because he was fucked up in the head." I spit, venom lacing my words as I gritted my teeth. There was a long pause before my father speaks up.

"I almost killed him." His chuckle made my head snap up, his face was twisted in amusement that I didn't understand, slowly things began falling into place.

"You... spoke to him after that night?" I asked quickly, they really have been hiding things from me all along, haven't they?

"We did, once we found out how he touched you. We confronted him, I needed to hear it from his mouth. Once he confessed, I snapped. I would have ripped his throat out if it wasn't for your mother stopping me." His amused face slipped away, and my eyes flickered back and forth between my mother and father, waiting. I still didn't understand what they are trying to tell me, maybe they had been the reason Izuku hasn't contacted me in 4 years?

"Why didn't you just kill him?" I huff and raise an eyebrow at my father's grim expression. His hands twitching on the envelop he was gripping tightly to.

"I couldn't... because it would have hurt you if I did so..." I snorted in amusement and slammed my fists into the table while standing up. My eyes went cold and hard as I stared at my father. I could have been hurt? A rough laughter barks from my chest as I grinned.

"Why the fuck would I be hurt that you killed that nerd? He is messed up in the head, who in their right mind thinks it's okay to... touch a child like that? Granted, I was 14, but he was 18, an adult. He should have known better!" I couldn't hide the growls that seeped through with my short rant. My father gripped tighter on the folder in his hands.

"He wasn't in his right mind, Katsuki! He was in heat!" His words stunned me, my hardened eyes seem to lose their coldness as I think back to that night. Izuku was a mess, his body was shaking on the floor, and that man, his words still ring clear in my mind.

"You fucking brat, didn't anyone tell you to not interfere with an alpha trying to mate?"

He must have been in heat, Izuku might have been small but he was never a pushover. He wouldn't have gone down without a fight. But I still remember that crazed look in Izuku's eyes when I managed to knock the man out cold.

His eyes were glassy and hazed over, it was like looking at a shell of a person that I once knew. He really wasn't in his right mind. I had been taught in school about Omegan biology and heat cycles, yet that didn't explain why he... why he touched me!

"Explain!" I growled and watched as my mother reached out and gently took hold of my arm, pulling me back into my chair.

"He had just turned 18, remember? His heat was -- triggered. He found his mate, Katsuki." My mother's voice was soft, and my brows furrowed in confusion. If he had a mate, why the hell was he feeling up on me?! A growl leaves my lips and my stomach twists into knots, I don't understand.

"Katsuki... you're his mate..." My father's voice was cold and hard, it didn't match the sorrow in his eyes. Looking to my mother, I try to see if what he is saying is just some sick twisted birthday joke, but her eyes hold the same sorrow that I found in my father's eyes.

"W-What?" I stuttered out and felt myself stiffen as distress rolled off me in waves.

"He is your mate, Katsuki. You triggered his heat early because you both had already had 4 years of a connection. When you saved him, he was already too far gone into his heat to really know what was happening..."

No, stop... I don't want to hear this.

"All he knew was that you were his mate, his alpha was there to save him. It was fucked up what happened to you both that night, but you are our son. We had to protect you, and by protecting you we had to keep Izuku alive and safe..."

Shut up, shut up, shut up...

"He was devastated when he came out of his heat, he loathed himself for hurting you." Sitting up in my seat, I couldn't stop myself from blurting out.

"You sent him away?" My father quickly shook his head slowly and sighed.

"No, he sent himself away to keep you safe, Katsuki. We made a deal that when you turn 18, we would give you all his contact information, his location, and a letter he had written to you before he left. We have been sending him stuff with your scent on it over the past 4 years to... make sure he didn't go crazy... or worse."

Or worse...? I don't like the sound of that...

"He agreed to it for your safety, but we know he has never stopped thinking of you. We told him that we wouldn't guarantee your contact with him once you turn 18, but we did say we would give you this information. He wanted you to make your own choice, for your own future." My father handed out the envelope and with shaky fingers, I grasped it. Does this have all his information? This will tell me where - my mate has been all these years?

With a sharp inhale I slammed the folder against the table in frustration, tangling my hands into my hair and tugging.

"This can't be happening... Izuku is my mate?" I questioned and looked up with pleading eyes. "Please just be a joke..." I begged.

"Izuku is your mate, son. We just ask that you don't reject him out of anger, it could seriously hurt you to break that mate bond right now. You are upset and you know that your mate is the only one you will ever get, so think hard and take a few days to look over these papers. We just want you to be happy, son. Izuku has punished himself long enough..." Those last words struck a nerve, my eyes glazed over and I find myself standing up slowly.

"Punished himself long enough? He ruined me for a long time! I trusted him and he turned around and did that shit! I was 14 and the one person I thought of as family had scared the hell out of me! Izuku can go to fucking hell!" I seethed through clenched teeth. My mother's eyes blew wide and my father sat still with a grim look on his face.

"Fuck him and fuck him ever being my mate." The low humorless chuckle that left my body sounded as if it didn't belong to me. However, I continued by leaning over, placing my palms against the table and smirking. I locked eyes with my father and then my mother before growling under my breath.

I grabbed the envelope that held the information I needed, and I held it up beside my face with one hand, the other propping me up over the edge of the dinner table.

"I won't reject him right now. I want to be there, to see him shatter when I reject him to his fuckin' face."

Chapter Text

𝓚𝓪𝓽𝓼𝓾𝓴𝓲 𝓑𝓪𝓴𝓾𝓰𝓸𝓾

 

Dear Katsuki,

If you're reading this, I believe that it's safe to assume you know everything. There are so many things I want to tell you as I write this, but I don't have much time.

It's only been a week since that night and I know I need to write down my thoughts and feelings for you to read someday. I have barely had time to process everything that's happened over the past week. I know it will take time and I can't imagine how you must be feeling after all this.

The most important reason for this letter is so I can apologies for everything that's happened, everything that I have done to you. Although I plan to beg for forgiveness at your feet the moment I see you again, I know that you might choose not to contact me once you turn 18, and per my agreement with your parents, I will stay away from you and let you come to me if you choose to.

So, I needed to write this in hopes that you will read it and at least know how sorry I am for ever hurting you. I guess it's only right to start from the beginning and tell you that I never wanted this to happen. When I was hired to watch you over the summers I thought it would only be a job to earn some extra money to pay for school, however, I began to care for you as a person.

I considered you a friend and it was an honor to get to see you grow up over those 4 years. I know that as I grew up as well, my attention began to split more and I gave you less of my time.

Nevertheless, I cared for you and wanted to see you happy. When I left you at your house that night, to go get snacks, I never thought it would be the moment that would change my life forever. I didn't know what was happening to me. When I went into heat I was scared out of my mind, I still don't remember what all happened to me.

However, I don't think I can ever forget what a huge mistake I made. I will never forgive myself for hurting you.

Katsuki, I am so sorry.

When you saved me from that man, I was beyond grateful to you. Here you were, a kid, protecting me from something that would have ruined my life. However, I didn't realize that you were my mate until I saw your face.

Your scent drove me crazy, it was as if I was seeing you for the first time. It scared me, yet I couldn't help but want to be closer to you. I need you to know that this wasn't your fault, what I did was inexcusable. I just need you to understand that I truly did not mean to ever touch you like that. The heat was my first ever, and I had just been attacked. On top of that, I had found my mate.

I never wanted you to be my mate, Kat. I wanted to be your friend. I wanted to protect you and see you grow up more. I never wanted to be the cause of your fear. When I touched you, it was if my body was being driven by instinct alone. I barely recognized you. All I knew was that your scent was that of my mate.

However, the look of fear on your face snapped me out of it. I am so glad it did, Katsuki. So glad.

I forced you to leave so I wouldn't hurt you anymore, and so I chose to leave until you are 18. As I write this, it pains me to even think about leaving you for so long, but I know it's the right thing to do. You are my mate, but you are a child and I can't stand the thought of hurting you again.

Things have changed since I felt the mate pull, our bond is new and weak, yet I already care so deeply for you. I never want to see you scared of me again. I can only hope that someday you will find it in your heart to forgive me for my actions and give me a chance to prove to you that I am worthy to stand by your side.

As I see it, there are two ways that this could end. I know you quite well, I like to think, and that makes me believe that I know how this ends.

Part of me already knows that as soon as you find out I am your mate, you will reject me. I know this is to be expected, I hurt you, and there is no way you could ever see me as a mate. I lied to you about being an omega, I started to drift away from you, I hurt you, and now I am leaving without a trace for 4 years. There is no reason for you to show me any kindness, the Katsuki I know wouldn't go easy on me.

Another side of me, the side that now sees you as my mate, desperately wants your forgiveness and acceptance. Over the past week, I have come to terms with the fact that you are my mate, although I don't like it much at all. It bothers me to think about us as mates, yet I can't stop myself from being glad I was mated to you and not anyone else. I want to be able to earn your affections someday, however, I know my Katsuki would never forgive someone so easily. You have always been strong-willed.

For now, I can only hope that you lived the past 4 years happily. I hope you have grown closer to your friends at school and that you take comfort in them while I am gone. I hope my actions have not ruined your life as I fear they will ruin mine.

Lastly, I will stay faithful to you until the day you decide you no longer want me. I will take the pain of a thousand rejections if it meant you would be free of any burdens I may have caused you. In my mind, I belong to you now, you are my mate. No matter what happens, I will be focusing on doing the best I can to build a life for myself and wait for you to contact me, with either good or bad news.

I will not force you to be with someone like me, I only ask that you don't reject me until I can see your face one last time. I will surely shatter.

However, I will gladly shatter at your feet for the sins I have made. Until then, please keep yourself safe and know that I don't plan on giving up on the idea of us. Over the next four years, until I see you again, I will be holding out with the hopes of getting to see you and apologize in person.

Know that I am truly sorry, Kat.

I'm sorry, mate.

-Izuku Midoriya

***

I'm sure that I have read this letter a hundred times by now, searching every line for something to make my situation less real, less painful. Izuku seemed remorseful in his letter for what happened, yet I can't stop being mad at him.

I was mad that he touched me, yet I couldn't care less about the physical aspect of what he did. I was 14, although he was 18 and it was wrong, it didn't really bother me. What bothered me all those years ago was that it caused him to fucking go away. Sure, I had nightmares from the whole ordeal and for a long time was nervous when people touched me. I got over it though, and it had never bothered me again -- until recently.

When I found out Izuku was my mate, I had that nightmare again. The one where instead of the grown Alpha forcing himself on Izuku, it was the Omega who was forcing himself on the teenage version of me. I had spent the whole next day trying to convince myself that I wasn't that weak little boy anymore, that no one would ever be able to do that sort of thing to me again. I am an Alpha, there was no way anyone would be able to hurt me like that now.

So, why in my mind could Izuku break me down and make me question my strength? I spent the past 2 weeks looking over the documents that my father had given me, re-reading this letter and trying to make up my mind about so many things.

I wanted to reject him, I wanted him to be hurt how I was hurt back then. I wanted him to feel the pain of losing someone he claims to care about, just how I hurt when he left me 4 years ago. However, the idea of causing Izuku pain seems to tie my stomach into knots.

As I drove down the road, I had so many things running through my mind. It has been hours, yet there were 3 more brutal hours of driving to go before I reached where Izuku was now living. I had made up my mind to finally stop plotting in my room, and just go get it over with.

Apparently, he has graduated from college and now is working at an editorial company. He had always wanted to go into some form of a writing career. My dad's documents say that he lives alone in an apartment and most of the time he works from home. Something about his health, I only assume it's because of his heats that he has the option to stay home and work.

It was rare for companies to hire Omegas if they can't work from home. Once every 3 months their bodies meltdown, effectively putting them out of work for a whole week. Not a smart business move, yet in today's society, it was against the law to discriminate against Omegas. Meaning, that all workplaces must offer Omegas the option to work from home, and give them every heat cycle off work.

I scoffed that I continued to waste my time thinking about Izuku. I took an exit as my GPS screamed at me. I flicked my turn single and sighed. I haven't even called Izuku to let him know I am coming over. But I didn't care to hear from him. I just wanted to see him once, then I will reject him. There was no way our relationship would ever work out, not after everything we had been through.

Izuku wanted to apologize to my face, he will get the chance to, but then I will end things and go home and live my life. I can find an Omega elsewhere and although they won't be my mate, once the bond is broken I will be able to freely find relationships elsewhere without the stupid nagging in the back of my head about having a mate out there.

Izuku would be out of my life like he has been for the past 4 years, and how he will be for the rest of my life. I don't need him and I refuse to let him make me feel weak again.

As I drive close to Izuku's town, I couldn't help but get angry at the thought of him. Izuku's letter replayed in my head as I drove. He said he would never give up hope on us working out, that he wants for this to work. How fuckin' sick was that?

He had probably spent the last 4 years preening over me, wanting me, thinking about me. The last time I saw him, he was groping me and scaring the hell out of me. Now, I couldn't stop the anger that bubbled in my stomach as I realized that over these past few years, Izuku had been thinking about me. He had been wanting to be with me, as mates, as boyfriends, and as lovers.

Gritting my teeth, I growled. I was seething at the thought of Izuku using me as masturbation material over the years. I could not stop the uncomfortable feelings that were swarming me as I mulled over the fact that Izuku has been going through his heats. I haven't been able to feel the mate bond but for 2 weeks; he has been of age for four years now.

How many times has he screamed my name during his heat? Thought about me like - that? How many times has my image flashed through his head as he found release? Stepping harder on the gas pedal, I ground my teeth together in anger. Izuku had no right to those thoughts, not after the shit he put me through.

Who the fuck even knows, Izuku could have been sleeping with other people over the past 4 years since I wouldn't be able to feel that betrayal to our bond. I would only have been able to feel him as a mate for 2 weeks, and if he had been screwing around, he knew that I was 18 now and had stopped or else I would feel the betrayal.

However, I really can't care less about that. Sure it would suck to feel that pain, but I have no reason to feel any sort of way over that idea. He was not mine, and I do not belong to him. He has no right to want something, to need something, that no longer belonged to him.

I used to belong to him - a long time ago.

However, I cut those ties almost 3 years ago. I cut them when I realized he left me alone to deal with the confusion and anxiety his disappearance brought me. Izuku left me alone and scared. I wasn't upset that he touched me, not at first at least. He should have at least explained things to me.

Maybe back then I would have understood that he was out of control of his body and that I was his mate. I could have waited for him until I was 18. I could have put up with us not being able to see each other much until I was of age. I would have done that to keep him around. I needed him.

I loved him.

However, it doesn't stop the anger that I now have towards him. He hurt me, not physically, but emotionally. I lost a friend, a brother, and a mate before I knew he was even mine.

There was no stopping it now. I had given up on us a long time ago. I did what he asked in his letter - I kept myself safe - safe from the heartbreak of letting myself love him any more than I already had.

I refused to love him again.

Chapter Text

𝓘𝔃𝓾𝓴𝓾 𝓜𝓲𝓭𝓸𝓻𝓲𝔂𝓪

 

It had been over two weeks since Katsuki's 18th birthday; I had my calendar marked to track the days. Although it slowly turned mocking the more I saw the days pass with no contact from him.

Part of me wondered if his parents lied and never told him as we discussed - but it didn't make sense for them to lie this whole time. It had been four years of them sending me items with Katsuki's scent. They had spent years keeping me in the loop - at least enough to know that my mate was safe and happy.

Why would they go back on their word now and break our deal? I stayed away all these years, I made good on my side of the deal.

As the days ticked by and I found myself sinking back into that dark place in the back of my mind. It had been showing its ugly face more over the years; as my mental and physical health declines, it became easier to fall into the depression.

However, this time, it was because the monster in my head kept taunting me and telling me that Katsuki won't come for me. The monster had always told me that.

However, I tried to reason with it. My pathetic attempts to calm my own anxiety always managed to work. Nevertheless, the more days that passed with no word from Katsuki or his family, the more I began to think the worse.

I have yet to feel our bond break, meaning that he hasn't rejected me. I comfort myself with that small piece of knowledge; things can't be that bad if he hasn't rejected me yet.

I had told him in a letter before left for school that I would be waiting for him. In that letter, I apologized a handful of times and explained my side of the situation. But I know that a measly letter won't suffice.

Sitting in my living room, I have been on house arrest for the past month. My body was not bouncing back from my last heat. I had remained in a frail state. Most nights I spent fighting with myself to keep food down or even fall asleep at a decent time.

I was forced to come off my heat suppressants - I knew they were only making things worse and now that Katsuki was 18 I had to have faith that he would come for me. He may not want to be fully mated to me for a long time, but I was hoping that his presence in my life would at least bring my body back to normal.

I was slowly dying, I knew this; my doctors know this. Yet I chose this life to protect my mate.

Sipping on a mug of hot tea and honey, it soothed the dry burn in my throat. My skin was pale, and I have lost weight. I was tired all the time and barely managed to get my work done before crashing and sleeping for hours on end.

Thankfully, I have been able to work from home the majority of the time since I got hired after graduation. I only was required to come into the office once a month and for meetings with clients or my bosses.

Today was no different. I had been sitting on the couch for the past few hours trying to distract myself from my fatigue and sickness by working on a project. I only managed to shower today and slip into a pair of grey joggers, draping a fuzzy blanket over my bare shoulders, before flopping down with my laptop to work.

My stomach had been in knots all day - a new feeling - on top of my usual nausea from coming off the pills. Now that Katsuki had turned 18, it had hit me like a truck; my body was rejecting the fact that I was so far away from him now. He was of age and could feel the pull. He knew he had a mate and my biology was fighting me for being away from him. I was used to this thought. I had to be patient.

The damn moon goddess did this to ensure that mates found each other. It was unnatural what I had been doing to myself. However, I made my deal with the devil when I fucked everything up four years ago.

Slamming my laptop shut, I set it on the coffee table and leaned back against the sofa, gently rubbing the exposed panes of my stomach. It had been sore now for a few hours, slowly progressing and making me more and more worried.

Ever since the school nurse had brought up the fact that I could be infertile already - back before graduation - I began to worry even more about that. The closer Katsuki got to turning 18, the more I worried about his reaction if I couldn't have his children someday.

I had been too scared to go get checked out, and now with this stomach pain, my fears were bubbling back at the surface. If I fucked my body up, it would only be another thing I had to apologize to my mate for.

My sulking around doesn't last long as I am snapped out of my sad thought with a sharp knock on my front door.

I was not expecting any visitors today and the pounding on my apartment door had me sitting up and tugging the small duvet around my shoulders tighter before shuffling over to the door.

Another knock had me walking faster and muttering under my breath. I really just wanted to be left alone today. I have been avoiding Mina, Uraraka, and Shinso like the plague since graduation. They did not need to know how bad I have gotten over the past few months.

"Goddess, hold on..." Muttering, I fixed the blanket to cover my chest and shoulders and I fumbled with the locks. I wrinkle my nose at an odd scent that was making its way through the crack in my front door.

I yanked the last deadbolt open as the banging picked back up again, making me grumble and pull open the door, only to be hit in the face with the most intense scent I had ever smelt.

Stumbling back, I managed to grab hold of the door frame. My eyes and nostrils flared at the sensory overload before me. Choking on the sweet fumes, the sunlight blazing through the open doorway had me squinting my eyes.

The figure standing there was cast in a silhouette of sunshine. The figure walked forward and I stumbled back into my house. It was a man, yet there was nothing in that screamed danger. The man followed my retreat into my house. I wasn't afraid. If anything, I was confused. The scent was bringing back memories of piercing red eyes and ash-blond hair.

My body seemed to have forgotten how to function as my mate's scent wafted into my apartment. As my front door slammed shut, I blinked a few times to adjust from the harsh lighting to the now dimmer lights of my living room. Once adjusted, my gaze shifted over the man in front of me.

Katsuki.

Katsuki was standing in my living room. His body was barely recognizable from my last memories of him. He had obviously grown. Taller now, he stood almost a foot larger than me. I had to tilt my head back some just to see his face properly.

His blond hair was still wild as ever, yet trimmed and styled with a nice undercut that somehow made him seem older than he had to be. Four years had brought much change and long gone was that thin and lanky teenager.

Here he stood, an adult Alpha male. His back was straight and stiff as I trailed my eyes over his frame. His body tensed under my gaze as I locked eyes with him. My head was still tilted back some to meet his stare and his eyes are narrowed. A scowl was plastered on his face.

Suddenly I became self-conscious. Here I was standing in sweatpants, no shirt, and wrapped in a blanket. My curls were a mess from lack of combing and conditioner. My body had thinned out from everything I have been going through. I could only imagine what a mess I must look like.

Adverting my eyes, I looked away and to the side, unable to hold his gaze any longer.

Guilt, shame, fear, happiness, nerves, and admiration all flooded my system as I mulled over this new image of my mate. He was a man now. I had to remind myself that he was no longer a child. My brain still scolded me for feeling the instant attraction and pull I had towards him. I want to speak, to start my begging and groveling for forgiveness, yet my body refused to open up.

My heart hammered wildly in my chest from close proximity. The pain on my skin seemed to dull as his scent invades my home and my nose. I wanted him closer, maybe then the pain in my chest would fade as well.

However, before I could step closer to him, his voice broke the quiet and tense atmosphere.

"You look like shit."

Stunned, I blinked a few times at the floor before slowly bringing my eyes back up to meet his scornful stare. I flinched when his eyes held nothing but seriousness and disgust. I knew I didn't look great; my body had been deteriorating over these last few months. I couldn't help it. Even after coming off the heat suppressants my body still was crumbling.

I couldn't hold back the hurt from stinging in my chest at his words and tears pricked in my eyes. It was irrational to have this reaction from him. I had no real feelings for him other than hope and adoration. I was not in love with him and I did not know him anymore. How could I love someone I did not know?

Nonetheless, his words had me trembling. My brain told me I was not good enough to be with this beautiful Alpha that stood before me.

And goddess, he was beautiful.

Opening my mouth, I tried to speak. I needed to explain everything and beg him to hear me out. Since he showed up at my door, the constant itch had faded from my skin. The coldness that I felt along my limbs had dulled, replaced by a warmth that had my knees shaking.

I opened and closed my mouth, fighting for words. However, Katsuki beat me to it again. His eyes never wavering; his gaze was hard and cold - fixated on me.

"Pathetic. I wanted to get one last look at the person I was cursed with as a mate before I reject you. I'm disappointed." His words cut like knives, stabbing and twisting in both my gut and my heart. I knew my eyes must have been wide as they burned with dryness. The tears were gone, my body seemed too shocked to even produce the liquid that should have been running down my face by now.

Cursed? My mind was stuck and focused on his words. Reject?

Inhaling sharply, I hadn't realized that I stopped breathing. The pain that was rolling in my chest and stomach had my words stuck in my throat. I needed to speak but all I could do was stare, stupified by his presence - shocked by his words.

Part of me knew this would happen - he hated me. I had been mulling over the idea that he could hate me enough to reject me, but I ignorantly pushed it away. I had been naive to think he would show up willing to listen to me and even accept my apology.

I had been even more so daft to think he would accept me as his mate.

My ears were ringing as I stood, stunned to silence by my own fear of what was to come. Katsuki was going to reject me. I knew that the words are coming. The sacred words that would break our bond and surly kill me. My body was already too weak to handle this type of pain.

I thought I was willing to shatter at his feet if he wanted it that way, but I was wrong.

I did not want to lose him again. I wanted to fight for him to see me as something more than a monster that hurt him. It was selfish and I didn't deserve his attention or mercy after all the pain we both suffered from my actions.

Whether it be self-preservation or dedication to the Alpha before me - I did not know.

My body reacted on pure instinct. My knees gave out and I stagger to the carpet flooring of my living room. My legs parted slightly and my head bowed, tilted to the side in submission. My body forced itself to submission in front of my Alpha before my mind could catch up.

Katsuki's hitched breath was my only indicator that he had not left yet, and before he could think about leaving me, my mouth was opening and spewing pleas to the ash-blond.

"Please - Please don't reject me... I'm so sorry, I will spend my life m-making it up to you!" My eyes were wide as I stared at the carpet, my neck exposed still, showing my submission. I would spend my life as his subordinate if that meant he would stay. If he would forgive me. My body and soul would belong to him and I would do whatever he wanted just to get him to forgive me.

"What the fuck?" Katsuki growled and stepped forward. He reached down and grabbed my arm before hauling me to my feet. I did not flinch as my mind has gone blank to block out any oncoming pain from the rejection pending overhead.

I was roughly jerked to my feet, my head staying tilted and my eyes adverted. However, they were now filled with tears and leaking down my cold cheeks. My breathing had become shallow as my hands shook by my side.

"I - I am so s-sorry! I - Please - let me explain, d-don't reject me, Katsuki!" I stammered again as my body tried to crumble again to the floor - where I belonged. I needed to submit, to grovel for forgiveness. I needed to get my Alpha to stay with me.

The loud growl that erupted from the Alpha's chest had my body slumping back to my knees and rolling my head to the side again. A whimper escaped my lips as he sneered above me.

"Do not call me that! You lost the right to say my name! I am not 'Katsuki' to you, you will address me as Bakugou. Only friends and family get to use my name, and you are neither of those things!" The pure venom in his voice had me shaking on the ground. He hated me, there was no doubt about it anymore. He had changed over the years; I no longer recognize the person in front of me.

The last memories I had of him - before the incident - had been when he was calm and affectionate. He never yelled at me like this unless we were having a petty argument that normally ended in us both on the couch watching a movie with his head in my lap.

Fear radiated from my body; this Alpha was pissed, and it was directed towards me. This was the person I thought I knew; it seemed I killed that boy a long time ago.

Now stood an Alpha with anger rolling off him in waves. The scent was thick, choking me along with my own fear. My heart nearly stopped as his next words only begin to seal my fate.

A rejection that would surely kill me.

"I, Katsuki Bakugou, son of Mitsuki and Masaru Bakugou," Wailing, I threw myself at his feet and clutched his leg, desperately trying to pull myself up to stop him from continuing. My heart already stuttered in my chest as his words began the severing of our bond.

He only grunted and hissed, reaching down to shove me away from him. I dug my fingers into his jeans and shook my head, panting as my breath already seemed to be fading. I won't survive this - I thought I was prepared for this.

I knew this was coming. I knew I would shatter. However, I was blinded by my own dedication to him. My dedication had only run me to an early grave. Nonetheless, I needed to fight for him.

"P-Please, s-stop! I... I..." My stuttering only worsened as I fought for air. My lungs screamed in protest as the ash-blond Alpha growled and spoke up, continuing the ritualistic words.

"...Officially reject Izuku Midor-" I screamed.

"NO! P-PLEASE! It h-hurts! Y-you're h-hurting me! I d-don't w-want to d-die! P-Please!" My screams cut him off as I panted and shook, clinging to his leg as if I were a pup. My body trembled as my vision began to blur. My heart fluttered desperately, trying to keep my system in check.

I was barely able to look up and see two red eyes staring down at me before my body sagged to the floor, my vision going black as my head smacked the floor. It was quiet and cold for a moment before I felt my body begin to float away, swaying into the darkness.

It was warm, and the pain had gone.

Chapter Text

𝓚𝓪𝓽𝓼𝓾𝓴𝓲 𝓑𝓪𝓴𝓾𝓰𝓸𝓾

 

"NO! P-PLEASE! It h-hurts! Y-you're h-hurting me! I d-don't w-want to d-die! P-Please!"

My breath caught in my throat while watched Izuku shiver in pain. This wasn't normal, the way he was clutching onto me and crying over some form of pain had my skin breaking out in gooseflesh.

Breaking our bond wouldn't kill him, it would only hurt like a bitch. That's what I had been told at least. However, the way his body seemed to be violently shaking as his breath shallowed made me believe that this was actually hurting him way more than I had expected. The thought of him actually dying from something I did had my insides twisting. My instincts were clawing at me to protect my mate from whatever pain he was experiencing.

His screams froze my body and cut my words off yet again. How could I finish my sentence when he was screaming and gasping at my feet? I noticed his eyes rolling in the back of his head and I began to panic. He had said something about dying and as his eyes dropped shut and his weak body sags to the floor, my instincts kicked in full force. It was as if something took over my body and I moved quickly.

Diving down to my knees I tried to catch his fall, but I was too late. His head smacked the hardwood floor and I winced while grabbing at his frail body. I carefully slid an arm under his head and pulled him back against my chest.

The touches, although small, sent surges of sparks and heat through my skin and I inhaled sharply while tugging Izuku closer. I pressed a hand to his neck, my body moving on its own as I desperately tried to calm my Alpha nature that was worried sick over my mate.

He is breathing and his heart was fluttering. Closing my eyes, I focused on calming myself. I could hear his heart beating weakly behind his ribs and although it doesn't sound healthy, it proved he was still alive and that calmed me - a bit.

Scooping my other arm under his knees, I stood up and tucked him against my chest. This was not how I pictured today going at all. Granted I might have been a bit harsh; I was angry. I was - but now seeing Izuku passed out and pale in my arms had a sharp pain of guilt squeezing my heart.

Izuku did not look well at all. I had told him he looked like shit, and he does, but not for the reason he might have mistaken me for. I was shocked when I saw him at first, my instincts had taken over the moment I caught his scent and then matched up that sweet strawberries and cream smell with the sickly Omega in the doorway. It didn't make sense.

I hadn't expected to see him like that. My last memories of him were when he was lively with bright eyes. His skin used to have signs of life and warmth, however now he was thin. His once-bright eyes were dull and there were bags under them. Even his skin seemed to be lifeless.

Was he sick, or worse, dying? My father's words rung in my head as I quickly carried Izuku to his bedroom, sniffing out his scent to find the correct room.

"We have been sending him stuff with your scent on it over the past 4 years to.... make sure he didn't go crazy... or worse."

Was this the 'or worse' my dad had been talking about? My heart thumped irregularly in my chest as I placed Izuku under the covers in his bed. Taking a step back, I was hit with a wave of unease as I stared at his limp body.

He lived alone and I had no idea what to do about this. He seemed sick, but I didn't know what to do to help other than let him sleep. My mind howled at me to comfort him - but I refused. I came here to break our bond, and I would do just that as soon as I knew it wouldn't kill him. I might be harboring anger towards him, but I did not want him to die. He didn't deserve to die.

My parents were right when they reminded me that he was only a child when everything happened. He was 18, legally an adult, but still so young, and he had to make the choice to stay away from me for so long. Even his letter had expressed his remorse and dedication to me. Nonetheless, I couldn't simply forget the past, nor the pain that he had brought me.

When he is better again, I can break our bond so we both can live our own lives and I will feel better knowing that his death would not be on my hands.

His body trembled in his sleep and I stepped closer to get a better look at his condition. He hasn't changed much physically since I last saw him. Surprisingly, I remembered him well. Despite the obvious changes in his health, his body hasn't changed much.

His hair still sported those messy green curls that would never seem to fall just right. I spotted his freckles that dust his cheekbones and I have to physically move back to keep myself from reaching out and touching his soft-looking cheeks.

I could already feel the mate pull between us and it was fucking with my head. It doesn't mask the anger I have towards him; however, I was worried about him almost as much as I hated him. His health state had been a shock to me, and I knew that my instincts will not let me leave him right now. Not when he was simply lying there, pale and shivering. I took a seat in a chair sitting on the other side of his room and thought about my options.

I didn't have many as of now. I knew I had to stay here until he got better or until I figured out what was wrong with him and get him some help. I could take him back home so his mother could take care of him. However, I quickly toss that idea out the window, knowing damn well that I have already become invested. The moment he collapsed at my feet my Alpha instincts went crazy. If I tried letting him out of my sight now, I might tear something or someone down trying to get to him.

Deciding my course of action, I pull out my phone and send a text to my mother letting her know that I arrived and that Izuku was sick so I would be staying here for a while. She knew of my plans to reject him and I can tell she was being careful not to say something that might push me towards rejecting him sooner. My mother wasn't happy about things but she definitely did not want me making a rash decision.

The stupid woman doesn't know me very well then if she assumes that I haven't already tried rejecting him.

For the next few hours, I sat in the chair watching him sleep. I made my way around his apartment figuring out where things were and trying to get an idea of Izuku's life. The place was quite empty. It was kept clean, but I could tell the last few days have been rough by the look of things around the apartment. The dishes had been piled up in the sink and there was laundry spewed around his room.

I did not stop my exploring until I heard rough coughing coming from the bedroom where Izuku was at. I walked over to the door and stepped inside to see Izuku pushing himself up and trying to sit his body up while hacking his lungs out.

"Stop trying to move." My voice seemed to shock him and he freezes, the panic in his eyes was clear as he frantically searched the room. It had me frowning a bit. He only relaxed when his eyes landed on me, but they quickly filled with tears that I tried my best to ignore. My chest tightened as I saw him desperately trying to hold himself together and moved out of the bed to stand up.

"What are you doing?!" I could not help my angry tone as I rushed over to him and shifted his body back into bed and lay him down. I tried to ignore the sparks that burst through my skin as I made contact with him, just another reminder of the bond that I failed to break.

Our bodies pulled at each other to accept the bond and claim each other as mates. It filled my body with a painful need to be near him. Even as I pulled away from him and watched his wide eyes that were full of unshed tears, I could still feel the lingering sensations on my hands from where I had touched his arms.

"I thought you left..." His voice cracked, barely above a whisper and I heard his heart stop momentarily before it continues thumping away in his chest. As I stepped back again to put more distance between our bodies, his hand darted out and grabbed my wrist to hold me still. His hand causing sizzling pleasure to run through me made me jerk my hand away.

"I'm sorry!" His voice was hoarse and dry as he stared at me. His eyes were blown wide in desperation, his pheromones were thick in the air. His distress was obvious.

"Midoriya -- " I warned, avoiding his eyes as he stared at me. I did not know how much longer I could watch those eyes filled with tears. It angered me to see him so distraught over me. He was the one that left after being a creep and touching me. He shouldn't be crying over me. I thought I had gotten over the fact that he had felt me up when I was a child still, but seeing him now brought back all the confusion and pain. All I wanted to do was lash out. It hurt. He hurt me.

"I'm so sorry! I will be better! I won't hurt you again! I'm s-so sorry!" His crying eyes settled on mine and I winced at the red puffy skin around them.

"Just d-don't leave me..." Izuku sat there begging -- and for a split second -- my eyes softened as I looked at him before I sighed deeply and averted my eyes again. My instincts were screaming for me to comfort my mate, only making me twitch in anger that part of me still referred to him as my mate and not just Izuku.

"Stop crying," I said blankly as I reached out and pushed him gently back to the mattress. I swiped my thumb under his eyes, and as much as my body loved the proximity, I moved away again quickly. I could feel the difference already. Izuku was unfamiliar and cold, his body trembling with held-back sobs. I could tell he was trying not to upset me; he looked almost desperate for me to stay with him.

"You need to eat." My voice was low as I sighed while walking out of the room. I went and made him a sandwich and brought it to him along with a cup of water. When I set the plate down on his lap and placed the cup on the bedside desk, his eyes widened but there was a pain to them that had him looking helplessly at the sandwich.

"What?" I spat harshly but tried to relax when I saw him flinch back. I didn't know why I cared so much about how I was affecting him now, but it seemed that the mate pull was fucking with my emotions even more now.

"I -- I can't eat, I just throw it back up..." His words sent ice down my spine as my eyebrows crossed in confusion while I worried on my lip. Was he really sick?

"Are you sick?" Blurting out I kept my face as calm as I could while inside my Alpha was clawing for me to embrace Izuku and make sure he was alright. I couldn't help but tense up as Izuku coughed again and winced, telling me that there was definitely something wrong. I took a step closer to his bedside and kneeled down so I could see him better.

"Tell me what's going on. You look like shit and you are skin and bones." I watched as his eyes glazed over and hardened with an emotion foreign for Izuku.

Anger.

I tensed as the Omega whipped his head around to glare at me. His eyes were wide and his teeth bared at me had me tensing and on edge as his obvious display of aggression.

"Why the hell would I tell you?!" He snapped making me freeze and watch him as he shook slightly. He tried to collect himself while my own anger bubbled up. What made him think he could snap at me after all the shit that he had done to me!?

However, I swallowed my anger and watched as he calmed himself, glaring at the plain sandwich in his lap.

"You're right. I am not here to chat. You need to eat and get better so we can break this bond without it killing you." I spoke evenly while standing up. I walked back to the chair across the room and stared at Izuku as his eyes filled with tears again. Somehow, despite my anger towards him, I could not stop my heart from bleeding at the sight of his blank face stained with tears. His shaky hands picked up the sandwich and brought it to his lip.

He ate slowly and carefully, his eyes never once lifting up to look at me again as he finished his sandwich.

"Drink." Pointing to the cup on the nightstand, he doesn't even look up but instead reaches over to grab the cup. He tipped it back as he quickly chugged the liquid down. It calmed me a bit to see him feeding himself but somewhere inside I knew that no amount of food would fix whatever was wrong with Izuku right now.

And that bothered me more than I would like to admit.

Chapter Text

𝓚𝓪𝓽𝓼𝓾𝓴𝓲 𝓑𝓪𝓴𝓾𝓰𝓸𝓾

Izuku wasn't lying when he said that he threw up everything he ate.

The first time it happened was right after I had made him eat that sandwich. That night he jumped out of bed and ran to the bathroom, waking me up from my spot on the sofa. When I reached the bathroom he was already crouched over and ridding his stomach of everything he had ingested.

He started crying again right after and begging me not to leave him for a second time. I had told him to stop talking and I put him back to bed, making sure to watch him eat a few crackers just to make sure he had something in his stomach.

I didn't want to think about what I was doing here, I needed time to cool off and figure out what was wrong with Izuku so we can break this bond that's only been ruining our lives over the past 4 years.

Izuku may not see it as a burden, but I do. I had a good life back at home with my friends, who have all been worried about me since I left. I didn't know what to tell them, so I just said it was personal.

My parents would not spill my business to them -- at least I hope they wouldn't. The last thing I need is for my best friends to know that I found my mate. I know they will be excited, however, they would surely be skeptical to find out who I am mated to.

Over the years I had opened up to my friends about Izuku. I never told them about everything that happened between us, but I told them how much it hurt when he left. I told them enough. I bitched about him a lot at one point in my life. I didn't know why he had left me like that, and that was what made me so angry.

Now everything seemed fucked up beyond repair.

The only good thing was that Izuku had stopped vomiting all the time. He was able to keep some food down which seemed to surprise him greatly after 2 days passed with no incidents.

We both had not spoken to each other much over the past 3 days. Izuku seemed to be keeping his distance from me. Although, I catch him watching me sometimes. His curious eyes would follow me around when I was walking through the house.

At first, I would snap my teeth at him and glare -- I didn't want him looking at me like that. However, I gave up when I realized that seeing me was probably somewhat comforting to him. There was nothing perverted by the way he watched me.

His eyes held nothing but curiosity, so I stopped scolding him over it. I ordered a pizza for dinner and Izuku has been nibbling on one slice for a while now, making me look over at him more than once. It wasn't just the lack of eating that caught my attention this time.

I found myself looking at him, really looking at him, and taking in his appearance. The sight of him only brought me weird fluttering sensations inside my stomach that I absolutely hated. Yet, I couldn't look away from him.

His skin was getting some color back to it and I began to realize the cause of his sudden recovery. It was me, and although I hated the fact that my being close to him was making him better, it also made it clear that his being closer to me was speeding up his recovery. That was a good thing, kind of. The better he got, the closer I was to breaking the bond that's tying me to him.

As I watched him, I noticed more things about him that caused that stupid nagging in my midsection to start acting up. His curls were freshly cleaned and styled -- his better health seemed to make him feel good enough to fix his hair for once.

His eyes, although they hold a certain sadness to them, they were still that sharp shade of viridian. They were still big and round on his face. His eyes almost boasted with pride, showing off like crown jewels on his alabaster skin.

Shaking my head I ripped my eyes away from his face, not liking the sappy thoughts that were spilling into my brain because of him.

However, Izuku noticed my starting and for the first time in days, he spoke up. His voice was soft from lack of use over the days, but it seemed to freeze up my whole body. I had to force myself back from letting my canines drop as his voice sent shivers down my spine. I quickly cursed the damn mate pull that had my body on edge around him.

"What are y-you staring at?" His voice was hushed, a certain fear laced in his tone making me search his eyes for the source of fear. Only to find him looking at me warily. My insides twisted when I realized I was the source of his fear, or rather, he was afraid of what I could do to him.

He didn't want me to break this bond, I know that. Yet, I couldn't bring myself to care that much about what he wanted at this point. The more I looked at him, and the more time I spent around him, whether it be the mate pull or my weakness, I had found myself trying to be nicer to him today. I knew that he understood that I planned to break our bond and I knew it hurt him. I couldn't help but pity him for once.

"You're not eating much." I pointed out while glancing at him again, letting my eyes flick to the nibbled-on slice of pizza in his hand. His own eyes followed mine down to his hand and then he looked back to me with a shrug.

I waited for him to speak again, and it had my body rolling in agitation. I couldn't deny that I liked the sound of his voice and wanted to hear it again. It was a dangerous game I was playing by letting myself keep noticing these things about Izuku.

Dropping another slice on his plate, I pointed to it and huffed.

"Eat." When he didn't make any move to continue eating I turned back around and looked at him, slightly annoyed that he wasn't listening to me when it's his health at risk. The whole atmosphere had been tensed since I got here. Yet, it seemed to only double after Izuku snapped at me the first night I got here.

"Why do you care so much if I eat or not?" Izuku's voice sent pleasure shocks down to my core, his words barely registered as my mind yipped with delight. Only after his words register did I huff and sit back against the sofa. I turned my body to look at him. He was tense and his eyes shone with confusion and emotions that I didn't recognize off the bat.

"You need to get better." Izuku huffed at my response and his little eye roll caught my attention. A growl slipped past my lips and make him stiffen and glare at me.

"Yeah, so as soon as I get better you can break our bond." He spat harshly and I tensed up and growled lowly in aggravation. His attitude only sparking my alpha tendencies to dominate. The fact that he is an omega snapping at me has me on edge.

"Yes, I would like for you not to die because of it." I hissed through clenched teeth and turned away, grabbing my trash and taking it to the kitchen. I didn't realize he had been following me until I heard his bare feet padding across the tile flooring of the kitchen.

"Why do you care if I die or not? Huh?" His eyes flashed with anger as his chest rumbled with annoyance, resembling a growl but sounding weak coming from an Omega. I scoffed and crossed my arms over my chest after tossing away my trash.

I didn't know why I cared so damn much if he died or not. It wouldn't be my fault or anything. There were no legal repercussions that I could be charged with for breaking the mate bond with him. People died from it all the time if they weren't in full health when it happened.

Nonetheless, the idea of him dying because of something I did just -- didn't sit well with me.

"I don't know why I care when you are acting like such a brat. I should just break it now!" Growling my words through my teeth I instantly regretted them when pain flashed across his face, contorting his features and making me even more uncomfortable with the sudden pain I felt from his discomfort. He took a step back only to shoot me a glare, his face hardening to cover up his emotions.

"You should! I don't care if you h-hate me so much, I don't care... I don't care..." He went to leave the room but for some reason, my body refused to just let him go how I wanted him to. I wanted him to go away. I swear I did. So, why did my body burn when he said those words and turned to leave? I didn't like seeing him hurt no matter how badly I wanted him to feel the pain I had felt because of him.

When he turned to stomp off, my body moved forward and I ended up with my arms wrapped around him, holding him still and shuddering as his warmth seemed to seep into my pores.

His weak body thrashed in my hold and I wished I could let go. I wished my body would listen to me. I did not like touching him. It made me forget why I was ever mad at him. The sparks that popped along my skin when we touched. It softened my angry shell and I hated it.

However, my arms only tightened around him, firmly holding his back to my chest as I kept his arms pinned under mine so he couldn't hit me. That doesn't mean that the Omega didn't try. He tried to hit me.

"G-Get off me!" He sobbed, making me stiffen and instinctively nuzzle my face into his hair. I could smell his tears and felt them drip onto my arms as I held him to me. I wanted to be left alone, but I couldn't let him go. I couldn't help but flare with anger at his proclamation.

"Don't say shit like that. Ever. Again!" I managed to spit out as I clutched him tighter. His smaller frame was shaking in my arms and I relaxed my grip to try not to hurt him, knowing how weak he is right now.

"Why?! Get off me! You should break the bond already and leave! Who cares what happens to me, right? I am nobody, just some monster, right?" His sudden laughter had me stiffening and dropping my arms from around him in shock. He whirled around and jabbed a finger in my direction, taking me off guard. The emotions on his face didn't match the fear and depression radiating off his shaking frame.

I couldn't help but wince at the dark and heavy scents rolling off him that made me almost whimper from his distress.

"I don't want to be someone you hate anymore! I don't think there is anything I can say to make it up to you. I spent the past 4 years hating myself, Kat! I hate myself! I hate that you hate me so much! I want to die if you hate me, so just let me die already, do it!"

Stepping back, my back hit the counter while Izuku stalked forward. The tears were rolling down his face, mixed with his twisted grin that had me widening my eyes. This was not Izuku -- It seemed he died a long time ago and this -- person -- was what was left of the broken bits of his old self.

"Do it! Break it already!" His voice only rose more and more as he spoke and stalked closer. His heart thumped wildly in his chest and had me worried for him even more, only to curse myself for my conflicted feelings.

I should be pissed right now, we both should be arguing with each other and venting out our anger. However, I was standing dumbfounded by this new side of Izuku that had me wracked with nerves and unease. The Alpha in me cursed at me and begged me to comfort him and calm my mate down.

"Fuck you, I said do it!" He screamed, his hands slamming into my chest as he sobbed, letting his head fall forward and sink to my chest. His body seemed to give up the fight as our bodies collided.

In a swift movement, I wrapped him in my arms again and pulled him closer to me. His voice broke as his sobs grew louder. His tears wet my shirt as I waited for my brain to catch up with what was happening.

"Stop... talking..." I managed to say for maybe the hundredth time over these last five days. Bringing my hand up, I cupped the back of his head and held his face to my chest as his whole body shivered and quaked as he cried.

"K-Kat..." He whimpered into my shirt, stuttering as his fingers came up to grip into the fabric and held himself tighter to me. I couldn't ignore how my heart stopped momentarily before starting up again. His proximity brought me comfort, yet, I could not focus on that with all the emotions rolling off the Omega in my arms.

Izuku was seriously not okay. The more I had been with him over these past days the more I could see that we both have changed, and not for the better. Izuku could barely hold himself together and I was holding onto so much anger that I thought I had gotten rid of in middle school.

"You're not going to die. I don't hate you... So... stop talking like that." My voice was hushed as I raked my fingers softly through the back of his head, pulling his curls loose and trying to soothe his sobbing.

"I'm s-so sorry... I h-hate myself for h-hurting you... I j-just wanted a chance to m-make it up to you." His voice broke with small hiccups and whimpers as he spoke. It only had me pulling him tighter against my chest. Sighing, I breathed out and tried to clear my head.

"There seems to be a lot that we need to talk about..." I say lowly when his sobs die down and he stands limply in my arms, neither of us being able to move away and despite how much I want to let him out of my grasp, my body won't let me.

So, I hold him and knit my eyebrows together in confusion, blaming the damn mate pull once again as my body relaxed against my will, holding Izuku protectively in my arms.

Izuku may hate himself for what he did, but he doesn't need to. I don't hate him at all, I had been so mad at him but I don't hate him. He hurt me when he left, I had never had friends before him. I let him in my life and opened up to him, and he left me, that's what hurt the most.

I was scared when everything happened that night. I was scared that Izuku was hurt, then I was scared that he'd hurt me. Yeah, he grabbed my dick, but that didn't wound me as much as it did when he disappeared from my life like he never existed.

Neither of us has been thinking rationally lately, our emotions running high from the moment I showed up. Now, I understand that the only way for Izuku to get better is if we talk this out and settle on a decision because it affects us both.

I don't think that I want to keep our bond or anything or claim him as a mate, but I want him to understand my reasoning and for him to be healthy again. I won't reject him while he is like this.

"T-Talk?" His broken voice had my heart squeezing in my chest, my arms mimicking my heart as they tightened around his thin waist.

Goddess, help me.

"Shh, let's get you to bed. We can talk later." I tried to pull away but his fists clung desperately to my shirt making my arms break out in gooseflesh and my eyes squeeze shut.

"D-Don't leave me..." Sighing, I nodded my head, knowing that whatever has damaged Izuku so much has something to do with me. That bit of knowledge alone had guilt washing over me as the barely conscious Omega gripped to me with white knuckles.

"Shh, okay -- okay, I've got you."

I didn't know why I said that, but I let my instincts take over as my body bent over to scoop Izuku up into my arms. He automatically nuzzled into my chest and his body fell limp. My breath hitched in my throat as his scent glands were being presented near my face. I carefully move him to his bed and set him down, ignoring my own body's protest as I let him out of my arms.

I did not go to the sofa that night.

Instead, I pulled a blanket around my body as I sat curled up on the loveseat in Izuku's bedroom. My eyes focused on the sleeping Omega for as long as I could before sleep took over.

That night my dreams were filled with hot summer days when things were simpler; back then Izuku and I had nothing but adoration for each other.

However, when morning comes I am brought back to the reality that things will never be like that again. We have both changed and our lives will never mesh together so perfectly as they did when we were children.

I told myself this, but the moment I woke up to see Izuku watching me with curious and gentle eyes, my body shivered and my heart shuddered in my chest; his eyes alone were breaking down bits of the wall that I had spent four years building up around my heart.

Chapter Text

𝓚𝓪𝓽𝓼𝓾𝓴𝓲 𝓑𝓪𝓴𝓾𝓰𝓸𝓾

"We need to talk."

Izuku went back to being quiet after his meltdown yesterday. All-day today he has been avoiding conversation and staring off blankly.

I spent all last night in a restless sleep, my mind clouded with dreams of our younger selves. When I woke up with Izuku watching me from his bed, for a moment I felt myself let my guard down. I never noticed before how gentle his eyes were.

I had to quickly shake those thoughts away and slam that gate back up around my heart, there was no way I would let my memories break down the shell I built around me to protect myself.

Izuku's eyes flickered to me for a quick second when I spoke before darting back to whatever he was staring at. He never held my gaze for long and I was thankful, after waking up to his round doe eyes watching me I shoved all those fluttering feelings deep down and plan to keep them away.

This mate pull was going to be the death of me.

"What do we need to talk about?" His voice was steady, too steady, and made me narrow my eyes at him, trying to figure out what was going on inside his head. Yesterday when he started talking about wanting to die, it made me worry for him. I didn't want him to die -- I just didn't want to be his mate.

"About what happened yesterday, and about what we are going to do about us being mates." I could barely say the word without it causing me to grimace and grit my teeth. I hated saying the word, it made too real when that stupid warmth would pool in my stomach. Nevertheless, I had made up my mind that the best way to do this would be for us both to agree on a path to take so Izuku could get better and I could break the bond.

He was quiet for a while and as I watched him. I could see him struggling with himself. Emotions flickered through his eyes and morphed his soft features until he settled a calm expression - guarded. His face was only showing mild discomfort and worry now and I sighed.

"Okay." His voice was barely a whisper but I could still hear him. I inhaled deeply and leaned back on the sofa while I watched Izuku. He sat stiffly in the loveseat across from me and still wouldn't look me in the eyes. I knew that this all has been hard on him. I just wished I understood why he looked like he had been run over by a truck. I didn't get sick or lose weight from us being apart -- so why did he?

"I guess, the first thing I want to know is why are you so sick? How long have you been like this?" I shifted and crossed my legs, getting comfortable while still trying to get the point across that I was serious about this conversation. Izuku swallowed thickly and shook his head.

"I don't want to talk about that -- " Shaking my head I sat up straightened and leaned forward some, catching his attention and making his eyes flicker to me in confusion. I could see the curious look behind his shut-off expression and it made me uncomfortable. It seemed that was all I have been feeling lately when around Izuku. It was like the two sides of me had been fighting against each other constantly. The hurt kid vs. the mated Alpha who wanted to comfort the Omega a few feet away from me.

"Well, you have to." I spat but sighed when I watched Izuku shoot a glare at me. It has me trying t relax and come at this from a gentle angle. I grind my teeth together.

"You don't have to," I clarify. "But I would really like to know. Something's got to give here, we can't keep on going at each other's throats and I can't help that I don't want this mating to happen. So, we really need to talk about this."

His eyes scanned me for a while as his face relaxed. He looked to be deep in thought and although I wanted to speed this up, I couldn't seem to break him out of his deep pondering. I studied his face as his eyes dart around absentmindedly while in thought. However, my staring doesn't last long because Izuku suddenly stood up and walked over to me before sinking softly onto the cushions -- but on the far end of the sofa instead of next to me.

I watched him carefully and felt that unwelcome warmth that quickly filled my body at his proximity. I could tell he felt it too because his body seemed to relax and he let out a silent sigh as his face relaxed into a softer expression.

"Do you feel that too?" His voice was quiet still, almost as if he had been afraid to say something and set me off. I frowned but decided to take my own advice and answer him.

"Yeah, it's the mate pull." I looked over at him as he closed his eyes and sat in silence. He looked to be lost in his thoughts for a second before he exhaled slowly and closed his eyes.

"I was really scared that night -- B - Bakugou..." He spoke my last name with a stutter that told me he was not used to using it or thinking about me as anything other than Katsuki. I sighed when I remembered how I had yelled at him for calling me by my first name. It seemed that's all I have been doing, yelling or putting him down since I got here.

"After...everything happened... and my heat passed, I was left confused and angry. I was so angry... I was angry that I found out you were my mate, I was angry, I still am angry, at myself for my lack of self-control when I... umm yeah... Anyways, I held onto that anger for a while. It took me almost a year for me to get over how upset I was over the whole situation and begin to accept it for what it was."

He paused for a moment and I sat still and silent, almost afraid to say something that might make him shut down again. This was the most he has spoken since I showed up a week ago. I waited for him to continue, my stomach twisting in knots as he recounted that night.

"I eventually got over it and although I didn't like the act that we were mates, I began to accept it and try to live my life and do the best I could in hopes... well, in hopes that one day I would have made something out of myself and be worthy of... you." His eyes squeezed shut and he shook his head before continuing.

"My friends were amazing and they helped me through everything. Although I was doing better for a while, my heats still caused me a lot of trouble. I hated going into heat, it doesn't matter, I just was weak and I hated feeling out of control. It made me feel like how I did that night." Swallowing, I turned my body to face him as he kept talking. I was unaware as to why he had been telling me all this, but I had a feeling he needed to get this off his chest, so I let him keep on.

"I never enjoyed being your mate, okay? It wasn't like I was living the best life here away from you and my family for 4 years. My body started getting weaker the longer I was away from you. When you turned 18 my health started spiraling. I wouldn't have lived if it weren't for my friends, it got really bad they thought I would die." His eyes darkened and I watched his expression twist with a sadness that I had started to hate seeing on his face. His hands balled up into little fists that made me want nothing more than to reach over and take them into my palms to smoothe them out and ease his stress.

However, I sat still and waited for him to work through it on his own. He does quickly and took a deep breath before sighing it out. I wondered where his friends were if they had been taking care of him for so long?

"Basically, all you need to know is that I have hated myself and been angry with this situation for too long. It took me a year to come to terms with it, so I am not too shocked that you are so angry with the news. I know I am not much of a mate. I am older than you and not the best looking, but I never stopped caring for you..." I could hear his heart begin thumping harder in his chest and his cheeks turn a soft shade of pink that has me staring at him intensely. Although I hated to admit it, he was quite stunning. Even when he was underweight and sick, he had a softness to him mixed with this hue of beauty that I had been getting glimpses of over this past week.

"I want to ask you for -- a favor. I know you don't owe me anything after everything I did, but still..." He shrugged his shoulders and for the first time in this whole conversation, he turned and faced me, his eyes showed a vulnerability in them that I hadn't seen since that first day when I knocked on his door and about rejected him.

Taking a deep breath I watched as he methodically fiddled with his fingers and his body shivered once as he waited for my response. I wanted to say no to him -- to tell him that there was nothing I could do for him, but I knew it was a lie. I had a feeling that my Alpha was already becoming attached to him and would fight me tooth and nail if I did not grant his request.

I didn't know why I believed the story that he told me, but I did. He had no real reason to lie to me about his own suffering, and by the looks of him, it was true that he had been sick from being away from me. I loathed the guilt that a small fact like that brought me.

"It depends on the favor." His eyes lit up a little and my heart stops as his lips pulled back some over his teeth and he smiled at me. The smile wasn't full yet it made my palms break out in a sweat and had a warmth pooling in my stomach; it rippled and expanded.

"Okay," He breathed a sigh of relief and I had to hold myself back from groaning at his small but bright smile. Screwing my jaw shut, I held back any sounds from escaping as I mentally cursed this mate pull that had me reacting to the Omega beside me.

"I wanted to ask if you could do something for me... Because it took me so long to come to terms with the mate bond, I know what it feels like to be angry and not want it... I want to ask if you would just give me a chance... Give me a month to change your mind about us being mates. I will do whatever I can to make the past up to you, but if you reject me you won't ever know if this could have worked out."

His deep green eyes were locked with mine as he made his case, and for once, I was speechless. His eyes had me mindlessly trailing my gaze lower and watching his mouth curve and dip as he spoke. His pink tongue would dart out to wet his lips and his nose crinkled as he pleaded with me to give him some time to win me over.

Before I could think of a reply, he cut me off and my eyes flickered back to his lips before I ripped myself away from that dangerous place and looked back to his eyes. However, his eyes were not any safer than his lips it seemed because I was just as hooked on them as well.

Can I do that? Can I give him a month to try and win my affections? Shouldn't it be the alpha who chases the omega? This seems backwards and nontraditional and once again has me feeling uncomfortable, but I don't decline automatically as I thought I would.

"Give me a chance. One month, that's it. If by the end of the month, you still want to break the bond, I won't fight you on it. I swear --"

His lip rolled nervously between his teeth and his eyes shone with just a tiny bit of hope that made me almost cower, afraid to stomp out those flames that I haven't seen in so long. There was no way that I could fall in love with him. We never had romantic feelings towards each other back then; I was a child. I never saw him as anything more than a brother. A friend.

"One month?" I found myself asking and I mentally kicked myself when his eyes lit up even more while his lip was suddenly released from between his white teeth. A smile pulled at the corners of his plump lips and I ignored the way my eyes kept picking out those details in Izuku's face. I shook my head in defeat.

"Yes! One month, but you have to try! You can't just shut me out, it won't be fair... You have to at least let me get to know you and spend time together... But one month, that's all I ask." His face faltered for a second before he tried his hardest to hold his fear from showing. However, I was an Alpha -- and he is my mate.

I could smell the doubt on him as well as the hope and nervousness that leaked heavily from his scent glands.

"If I agree, you have to come back to my place for a few weeks. I have my friends there who will be worried about me if I am gone for a month." My mind wandered back to Denki and for a moment I was filled with worry and guilt as I knew how attached he had got to me. Knowing that I haven't scented him or the others in over a week had me feeling like a shitty Alpha and friend.

"Y-Your pack?" Izuku mumbled, perceptive as ever, and he watched me with soft eyes. His curiosity was burning in those green orbs. I swore I saw a spark of excitement as well before it flashed away.

"That's the plan at least. Anyways..." I shook my head, telling him to drop it; it was not something I wanted to discuss with him. In one month he would either defy all odds and win my affection, or I would be mateless and going home to my pack. He doesn't need to worry about my pack when our future is undecided.

"Anyways... So, that's my request... Give me a month, I will go back with you so you can see your family and friends. I will just need a few days to let my friends know what's going on, I can take work with me... You will give me a chance, right? You won't just push me away and ignore me?"

Izuku scooted closer to me and his thigh brushed up against mine, making me stiffen as those annoyingly lovely jolts of pleasure shot through me. I watched him ludicrously but with a little fear from how my own body screamed at me to embrace him -- to kiss him -- to take him.

My instincts pad my mind pacing with excitement from how close my mate was. This little spark of contact had me heated.

"Y-Yeah..."Since when did I stutter?!

My voice sounded too weak and breathless and I watched a small grin play on Izuku's lips. His own cheeks heated up as he leaned back some and removed his point of contact, leaving me to breathe a sigh of relief but also, and annoyingly so, feeling empty without those jolts of pleasure from his touch.

"Yeah?" Izuku asked with a smile and I find myself nodding my head.

"One month -- That is it!" My warning was for both of us. I didn't plan on this working out for us. We both knew little to nothing about each other and with our past, it would take longer than a month just to work past the baggage loaded to our 'relationship'.

However, when Izuku's eyes twinkled with delight and his head tilted with an adorable flop of his curls, I found myself almost cursing under my breath. I might not know him very well or even like him, but one thing was for sure. He was beautiful and had me thinking it might not be the mate pull that has me noticing his many amazing features.

Izuku's hands fold in his lap as he obviously struggles to not leap at me for an embrace, I am grateful but can't help but crave his warmth up against me again. He smiles and breaths out happily.

"That's all I need." I startled and looked at him. Determination being the one thing I saw in those seafoam eyes before I looked away and wondered what the hell I have just gotten myself into.

Chapter Text

𝓘𝔃𝓾𝓴𝓾 𝓜𝓲𝓭𝓸𝓻𝓲𝔂𝓪

"That's all I need."

His eyes watched me intensely, making me squirm under his pinpoint gaze. I couldn't believe that he was going to do this. I had no idea how I was going to do this.

One month was barely any time, and I knew that I would have to play my cards right. Right now wasn't the time for me to lose control. The fact that he was even humoring me with my request was enough to make me want to cry.

My Omegan instincts were practically purring; I had to focus to make sure I wasn't letting any actual rumbles out. Katsuki is still looking at me curiously so I offered a small smile, showing my gratitude and for a split second, I swore I saw his lip twitch as if he was going to smile back. Before I could see the smile, he wiped his face clear of emotions and got up.

Watching him leave the room, I couldn't even be upset about him just walking away. Inside I was a mess, jumbled up balls of excitement and relief had my stomach in knots and my face plastered with a huge grin.

Going into the kitchen I decided to cook dinner for him, something a little better than the pizza we had been munching on an hour ago. I still felt weak, but for some reason, I didn't feel as crapy anymore. I just felt like I needed some sleep and food.

Rummaging through the drawers I pulled out a crockpot and plugged it up on the counter. While digging through the refrigerator I found the roast that I had been thawing for a few days. I had planned on making a stew some nights ago but that never happened. My mood and health have been shit for so long that I barely had the energy to cook.

Today, although I was tired, I had been in a better mood and my body seemed to hurt less. I could feel our bond strengthening even if it was just the smallest amount. The fact that he was giving me a chance made everything so much better.

This was really backward though.

I chuckled to myself while I thought about how untraditional this was. The fact that I was the Omega chasing my Alpha was almost unnatural. However, I could put away my biological needs for a while and find some way to woo Katsuki before he started to chase me.

I feel myself blush at the thought of Katsuki ever entering that phase of the mating process with me.

The chase; also known as a mating frenzy. Mates entered that stage of the relationship when one or both partners strengthen their bond to the point where they start wanting to mark each other. It had little to do with the sex part, more so the need to claim the other as yours. The chase! I giggled to myself and shook my head. It had been a while since I have laughed; it felt good.

"What are you making?" I let out a squeak of surprise and jumped while spinning around, clutching my chest. Katsuki was leaning back against the counter, arms folded across his chest and the tiniest hint of a smirk on his lip.

"You scared the sh - heck out of me!" My face still felt hot from my previous thoughts so I quickly turned back to the crockpot and carefully dropped the roast inside before pouring some broth. I tried to relax, knowing that he could smell my emotions and I was not wanting to deal with embarrassing myself right after I got him to agree to this.

"You gonna answer then? What are you making?" His voice sounded a bit annoyed already and I swallowed thickly and tried to not let him intimidate me. I might be older, but I was an Omega! He was the Alpha here; Not just any Alpha, but my mate! Attempting to show my submission to him, I turned around and lowered my eyes quickly.

"I'm making a pot roast for later tonight. I figured this is cause for celebration." Shrugging, I quickly turned back to the pot and picked up the few potatoes that I had rinsing in the sink. Katsuki was quiet but I could hear his heart and I picked up on the faintest scent of irritation rolling off him. I knew he wasn't thrilled like I was. I sighed and shook my head. I shouldn't have said that shit about celebration. There was nothing to celebrate.

"Sorry," I mumbled and picked up the knife to peel the skin from the potato in my hand. He said nothing and just stood behind me, watching I can only assume. A little too close for comfort. I could feel him staring at me, making my hands tremble. I quickly set the knife and half-peeled vegetables down and made my way to the refrigerator. I grabbed a bottle of sport's drink and took a sip to calm down.

I had been drinking these to keep my electrolytes up since I have been vomiting so much over the past few weeks. Glancing over, I saw Katsuki watching me still and I offered a shaky smile. I didn't want to fight anymore, but damn, it felt like I was walking on eggshells. I would put up with it if it meant that I could win Katsuki over by the end of the month.

Deciding against asking him to stop staring, I busied myself back to peeling when my hands stopped shaking. I liked that he was watching me, even if he was glaring. Having spent four years without him and without his fresh scent, this was like a dream. Even if the air was tense and awkward.

"Do you like potatoes and carrots?" I mentally facepalmed when I asked this. What a great fucking conversation starter, Izuku! Ask him about the damn veggies, ha! Shaking my head as I chopped the potatoes, up I wanted to groan in frustration.

That was so stupid.

"I do." Hearing the slight amusement in his voice was a nice change from the cold and gruff tone he had been using with me. I smiled and chuckled under my breath.

"Okay," I whispered and grabbed the baby carrots from the refrigerator before I dumped some in the crockpot as well. Setting the bag down, I grabbed another potato only to stiffen up when I felt Katsuki step up behind me.

His arm reached around me and my eyes widened when I felt his breath on my neck. My eyes closed and I gritted my teeth to stop myself from whimpering at how nice it felt to have him so close. His scent was strong and my hands shook again. However, my eyes snapped open when I heard rustling and the sound of something dropping into the crockpot.

Katsuki was dumping the rest of the bag of baby carrots into the pot and I blinked in confusion. He shot me a quick glare and I blushed before looking away.

"I like carrots --" That's all he said as he emptied the bag and tossed it in the trash bin. I fought to hold back the smile that threatened to take over. Well, that was a change from his younger self.

"If I remember correctly, you used to hate any type of vegetable," I stated softly. I couldn't help but think back to when I had tried to get the 9-year-old Katsuki to eat the veggies that were mixed in with his Chinese chicken dish. I specifically remembered the carrots that he threw at me for trying to make him eat them.

I hear him scoff and I turned away from the counter to look over my shoulder at him. He had that same cold look in his eye again, making me want to shove my foot in my mouth. That was all I seemed to do when I tried talking to him. I keep saying things that made him upset.

"Sorry," I muttered for the second time and felt a pain in my chest that had me turning away quickly and rubbing over my sternum with my hand.

"Forget it." He mumbled. Frowning at his words, I felt myself begin to panic and my hands tremble again. I knew I would mess this up. Not an hour after he agreed to my request and he was already backing out. I was a horrible mate and person. I couldn't stop upsetting Katsuki. I was so fucking pathetic!

My grip on the knife handle tightened and then faltered when I felt Katsuki grip my shoulders. He turned me around to face him and my breath hitched in my throat. All I could do was whimper.

"Don't leave me..." I whispered for maybe the hundredth time over the past week. I was so pathetic; I couldn't even look him in the eyes.

However, I startled when his finger hooks stiffly under my chin and forced my head up. I blinked away a few tears, quickly trying not to show how weak I was. His face is screwed up but he sighed after a few seconds of staring at me, he relaxed.

"You misunderstood me. 'Forget it' as in don't be sorry, idiot." The small smirk that tugged at his lips had me wanting to cry for a whole new reason. Anyone else would have been mad at being called an idiot, not me though. I relaxed and closed my eyes for a second, loving the way his finger felt under my chin. It sent warmth through my body.

"Okay," I whispered, not knowing how else to reply right now. His hand quickly pulled away and my eyes snapped back open lazily.

His face was screwed back up and I realized that he must have gotten a little lost in the feeling our mate bond provided when we touched. It was like sparks and sizzles that popped along my skin and sunk warmly into my core when he touched me. I knew he must feel something too.

Instead of commenting on it, I just turned back to the cutting board and worked on peeling the rest of my potatoes. After a few silent minutes, I worked up the courage to ask another question.

"How are your friends?" I remembered him having a few friends back in grade school; they seemed close. I hoped he still had them around. I wondered if he has made them pack members if so, I might get to meet them! That would be nice, getting on the good side of the people close to Kat would be a good thing for us. If they could like me, then I was sure Katsuki could like me too.

"They are fine." His voice sounded stiff and I wondered why. So, I turned slightly to peek at him.

"What are they like?" I probed a bit, trying to get him to talk some more. His voice was nice, although a lot of the time his voice was hard and angry. It was still nice to hear him talk after so long without him.

"Why do you want to know?" He snapped making me frown. I shook my head, dismissing him. I did not say anything else and just dropped the other veggies into the crockpot before looking through the cabinet for spices. After a few long and silent moments, I heard Katsuki sigh and slump down onto a stool that was in the kitchen by the counter.

"I'm still friends with Kirishima if you remember him. He's as loud as ever but my best friend, so it's fine." I smiled to myself as I listened to his voice soften some. He spoke of his friends softly. I paused my chopping and just listened to him, not turning around to watch him just in case my staring made his storytelling stop.

"Denki is a great friend as well. He's a little misguided but is always there if one of us needs someone to talk to. He's pretty funny and for some reason get's along with dumb hair as much as I do." I wrinkled my nose to hold back a snort as he called his friend 'dumb hair'. It must be a nickname. I could vaguely remember hearing that from somewhere but I didn't interrupt him. His voice was soft and I could almost hear the smile behind his words. I wish I could see that smile, but I knew that as soon I turned around it would vanish.

"Jirou is Denki's cousin, I met her in high school after I had already been friends with Denki and Kirishima for a long ass time. She's quiet but sometimes has quite the attitude when she wants. She and Denki are always together when Denki isn't with me. That is when Kirishima isn't hogging me to himself." His light laugh sent shocks through me and I caught my lip between my teeth and held back a whine. His laugh sounded amazing. It was deep but light at the same time. I grabbed the knife again to start chopping, knowing I needed to do something or else I would lose myself in his voice.

"They sound lovely," I whispered and thought about my friends. Mina was amazing. She was loud and bossy, but her great humor and motherly attitude made up for her intense Alpha qualities. Uraraka was one of my best friends. She understood being an Omega and had always been there for me when I needed to vent or just have someone to hold me when I had bad days.

Shinso was one of my newer friends -- we met almost nine months ago when I had a heat cycle so bad that I needed him to scent me. It was terrible being scented by an Alpha male that wasn't my mate, but it helped me. I would have died. I was sure if he didn't help me I would have.

"They are practically family." I smiled and nodded at his words, understanding perfectly what he meant. Mina, Uraraka, and Shinso were my family too. Since I didn't get to see mom often, I found a new family to call my own.

"You love them," I stated, making him catch his breath. I could hear it -- it only made me tense up and I worried that I said something wrong again. However, he sighed and went back to normal.

"Of course I love them, they are pack." Smiling, I felt myself warm up. Pack. He had already found his pack; that was great news. I wanted to meet them badly now. The fact that they were not just friends, but pack made me want to impress them even more.

Pack members were family, not just friends. They would be around for life and were your main support system. If things worked out with my plan, and Katsuki accepts me as his mate, they would be my pack as well. That was a huge deal.

"I'm happy for you," I whispered, knowing that he could hear me. Humming under my breath I was brought out of my daydreaming when a sharp pain jerked me back to reality.

"Ow! Shit!" I dropped the knife onto the floor and held up my bloodied hand -- It looked worse than it was. I've done this way too many times. I suck in the kitchen. Some Omega I am. I scoff at my thoughts.

"Shit, are you okay?" Katsuki's worried voice made me want to scream for joy but my hand was throbbing as I stuck it quickly under the faucet of running cold water. I smiled lightly and nodded.

"I'm fine... This happens more than I would like to admit. It's just a little cut..." I watched the water turn a red as it swirled down the drain and I sighed as it kept bleeding. I seemed to have cut my middle finger and it was a bit deeper than I had accidentally cut before.

"Dammit..." Muttering under my breath, I stuck my finger into my mouth and sucked, trying to seal the wound with my saliva. Shifters had healing properties in our saliva, so I knew this would help. However, it was not helping as much as I had hopped and the iron taste filled my mouth making me want to gag.

I pulled my finger out and frowned at my hand.

"Here." My eyes widened as Katsuki grabbed my hand with furrowed brows and brought my hand to his lips. He was quick to take my finger into his mouth and closes his lips around the knuckle. My breath hitched in my throat as I stared with blown-wide eyes at my mate who was sucking my finger.

Willing away any sexual thoughts -- before I get harder than I already was -- I couldn't help the overwhelming feeling of comfort this act brought me.

Katsuki was my mate, meaning his saliva would heal me faster than others -- or my own. I felt the dull throb that was pulsing in my hand begin to fade away and his eyes stayed closed. His brows knitted together in either frustration or concentration? I couldn't tell, but it didn't matter.

Katsuki just willingly helped me and once again I was in his debt. How many times was he going to have to save me? Whether it be from crazy Alphas trying to take advantage of me -- or my own clumsy kitchen skills -- Katsuki had saved me yet again.

Chapter Text

𝓚𝓪𝓽𝓼𝓾𝓴𝓲 𝓑𝓪𝓴𝓾𝓰𝓸𝓾

Everything was packed and ready to go.

I had called my parents to let them know what was going on and needless to say, they weren't thrilled with the idea of Izuku staying with us for a few weeks. Izuku was nervous, I could tell. He had been rummaging through his suitcase multiple times and emitting waves of distress.

Izuku told me that his friends are going to be house-sitting for him while we are away. Evidently, this neighborhood isn't the safest and break-ins are common. The fact that he was living in this type of location didn't sit well with me.

"So, when will your friend be here so we can leave?" I asked while watching him pick through his suitcase for the hundredth time. He had been muttering to himself and checking his stuff all day.

"Oh, umm... Soon." He replied although he seemed to not really hear me. I walked over to him and shut his suitcase, snapping him out of his nit-picking and making him blink up at me.

"W-What?" His stuttering made me smirk and I stepped back as I caught myself looking a little too closely at his pink tinted cheeks.

"You have everything. You've checked a hundred times and if you don't stop, you're gonna drive me crazy. Go sit down or something." I said seriously and I watched as his cheeks heat up delicately and he quickly scurried off to the living room where I found him perched on the sofa, bouncing his leg as his nerves have obviously not gone away.

Sighing to myself, I head back to the spare room where my bag was waiting, packed with my clean clothes. Doing a quick check through the house, I picked up my toothbrush and shower supplies before stuffing them in my bag as well. The sound of chatter broke my last-minute packing as the smell of another Alpha hit me in the face making a low rumble pass my lips. I drop my bag to the bed and stalk towards the living room.

When I walked into the room, I instantly went to Izuku's side and pushed him behind me slightly, startling both myself and the Omega. I felt his hands press to my back slightly as he tried to step back around me.

"It's fine... This is Mina, she's my friend from college, she's here to house sit." Izuku's voice barely registered as I stared down the Alpha female that was leaned casually against the wall with her arms folded and a smirk on her lips.

"So, you're the reason for Izuku's eternal suffering, huh? Interesting." Her voice held a taunting tone, making me growl lowly -- only to be cut off by Izuku stepping in front of me. Right as I was about to jerk him back behind me, he slammed his small hand on my chest making me widen my eyes in disbelief and shock.

"No fighting in my house! Mina is my friend!" Izuku looked annoyed as he stood recklessly between two agitated Alphas. It only flared my anger but one more look at the curly-haired Omega had me huffing and standing down.

"Well then, you seem pleasant. Nice to meet you, blondie. The name's Mina, I assume you're Zukie's mate. It's about time you showed up, you know, with Izuku almost dying and shit. Nice of you to join us." Mina sauntered over and slung her arm around Izuku who rolled his eyes and smiled.

My body was tense as the other Alpha stood wrapped so closely with Izuku; the fucking mate pull was making me angry that the Omega was being touched by another Alpha. Izuku looked at me quizzically before understanding crossed his features and he gently removed himself from Mina's grasp and stepped closer to me.

I have to resist the urge to rub myself all over him and get the other Alpha's scent off him. The fact that I cared so much pissed me off and I just shot a glare at them both before stepping back to give me space from the two. However, something else crashed my train of thought. Something Mina said made me freeze.

"What the fuck do you mean about Izuku almost dying?" For some reason, my body was tense with worry.

"Oh geez, Izuku you sure did get a smart one." Mina groaned, sarcasm and venom laced her tone as she shot me a death glare that had me growling at her.

"Leave it alone, Mina. It's not worth it..." Izuku mumbled and reached out for her, only making me growl louder. The Alpha smirked and stepped closer to me, threatening me without saying a word. She may be older, but I don't back down from challenges. It was in the Alpha genes.

"Leave it alone, Zukie? He has been treating you like shit over the past few weeks all because of a misunderstanding that happened 4 years ago. You almost died, Izuku! We almost lost you last year! Do you not remember that!?" Mina growled out, staring at Izuku.

Her intense glare made Izuku flinch back and whimper. The amount of pissed off Alpha in one room seemed to be too much for the greenette. I faltered slightly as I scanned Izuku, wanting to know that he was okay. I hated that I cared so damn much, but for some reason, it seemed that I would not be able to focus unless he calmed down some.

"Izuku, come here..." I ordered lowly and watched as his bright orbs widened and he looked at me with disbelief clouding his features.

"W-What?" He stuttered and Mina growled, shooting me another glare. I returned the glare before whipping my head to face Izuku who was standing stiff and emitting waves of worry.

"I said, come here." I left no room for argument. Yet, I did not Alpha command him, and I watched as Izuku staggered forward almost involuntarily. As he came closer, Mina reached out and grabbed his arm.

"You don't get to boss him around after the shit you pulled. I know your game, alpha." She hissed through clenched teeth as her grip tightened on Izuku's arm, making me see nothing but red as he winced slightly.

"M-Mina... It's not worth it, okay? I said I would go with him and whatever the outcome is, I am aware and prepared for the consequences." Izuku turned toward Mina, turning his back and facing the female Alpha. I clenched my fists by my side and tried to control my anger.

"He hurt you, Izuku. I don't want to see you go through that again... You've got to be careful, okay?" Mina worried over him as if I planned to take him away and have him killed or something. I agreed to this stupid one-month trail shit. I didn't back out of the deals I made.

"I know, Mina... I know, but he's my mate... I... I have to try something... anything." He whispered, but of course, I could hear him. I grit my teeth but sighed in relief when Mina let go of his arm and stepped back.

Izuku moved back closer to me and this time I slipped my arm around his waist and yanked him to my side.

"Possessive little thing for someone who doesn't even want his mate." Mina sneered before I felt Izuku tense up and step away from me, forcing me to let go of him. His eyes clouded instantly with distress and he gave a small smile to Mina.

"I need to go finish packing." He spoke lowly before escaping to his already finished suitcase. I watched him leave with a worried frown before Mina chuckled humorously making me snap my gaze back to her.

"What's your fucking problem?" I growled and watched as she just flopped down onto the sofa and crossed her arms. Her smirk never left her face as we stared each other down.

"Right now, you're my fucking problem, little alpha. You hurt my friend. I had to take care of him for 4 years while he rotted away, slowly killing himself with stress. You don't know the half of it, boy." She sneered, making me want nothing more than to rip her jugular out, but her words have me stunned.

"Shut the hell up, you don't know the whole story, so you don't get to tell me I am in the wrong for my actions here!" Stalking forward, I stopped when I was left standing right in front of the woman who didn't make any move to avoid his advances.

"I'm not scared of you. I might not know the whole story, but I do know that something terrible happened to you both back when you were kids. However, you are both fucking adults now! Izuku has spent the past 4 years killing himself over you. Whatever happened back then haunted him, as a mate you should care that he was killing himself over the guilt! Then I get a phone call from Izuku one night, he was hysterical and crying." Mina paused and suddenly stood up, jabbing her finger towards my chest. I growled back but was too stunned to move.

"He said his 'mate' had shown up and automatically tried to reject him. Did you not see how weak and sick he looked? We're you trying to kill him for real?! If you hurt him, I swear I will hunt you down and ruin you, Katsuki Bakugou." Her voice was low and sent a shiver through my spine.

Giving a curt nod, she seemed to relax quickly and a smile pulled at her face. Creepy.

"Great, good chat. Now, let me go check on - oh there he is. Hey, babes. How are you feeling?" Mina skipped over to Izuku who was holding his suitcase with slightly red-rimmed eyes.

Was he crying in there? The thought made me almost whine wanting to comfort him. However, I was stuck with whiplash from Mina's mood swing. I watched carefully as Mina took his bag and smiled, she wrapped her arm around him and lead him over to the front door.

"I'm fine." He mumbled, avoiding my eyes as he exited the house with Mina. I barely heard her whisper to him about helping him load up the car, leaving me standing in the living room trying to process the conversation/lecture I just received from Izuku's Alpha friend.

I hear the trunk of my car slam shut and I grabbed my bag before heading to the door to put my stuff away as well when I hear Izuku and Mina speaking quietly beside my car. His head was hung slightly, and Mina rubbed his arms softly, comforting him how I wish I could.

Shaking my head, I grit my teeth and pushed away those sappy feelings. They would only bring me heartache later. I was not ready for a relationship, let alone a mate. That commitment with Izuku would be too much to handle. We have too much baggage that needed unpacking before we could move past our history and work on a future -- not that I even wanted a future with that nerd.

Leaning against the doorframe, I listened in on what they were talking about, not even caring that I was eavesdropping.

"Have you stopped taking them?" Mina's voice was hushed and full of worry. Izuku sighed and nodded his head. Stopped taking what?

"How are you feeling? I mean you've been taking them for years. Are you having any symptoms, cravings, withdraws?" My heart stopped momentarily as I watched Izuku shove his smaller backpack in the backseat before closing the car door.

Withdraws? Had he been taking some kind of drug over the years? Was that what Mina had been saying about him killing himself over the years? The thought of Izuku taking illegal drugs had my body flooding with guilt.

"I'm fine. I mean, it's hard with all my emotions running wild again. I don't have the pills to calm the chatter, you know?" Izuku sighed and Mina nodded her head with sad eyes.

Turning away from the door I took a deep breath as I tried to process the information I had taken in. Izuku had been taking pills for years. No wonder he looked so pale and weak when I got here. The throwing up, the nightmares, the lack of eating, his body was going through withdrawals of some sort.

Clenching my fists, I tried to wipe away the feeling of guilt and dread that filled my body. Hauling my back over my shoulder, I took one last deep breath before heading outside to the car. When Izuku spotted me, he quickly looked away, making me frown.

I pushed my bag in the back seat and stood awkwardly before I cleared my throat with a cough.

"So, you ready to go?" I asked carefully and watched as Izuku looked at Mina, who was smiling softly back at him before he peeked up at me. My heart thumped in my chest as his green unsettled waters stared back at me. My breath hitched and I swallowed at the raw emotions swimming in there.

Izuku nodded his head and slipped into the front seat quickly, breaking the spell his eyes had cast on me in that brief moment. I caught my breath and looked over at Mina who had a smug look on her face.

Scowling at her, I walked around to the driver's side.

"Remember what I said, blondie. If you hurt him, we will come after you. If you chose to reject him, you better not kill him. I want him home safe when you're done toying with his emotions, little alpha." Mina glared, making me roll my eyes and slip quickly into the car before I ripped her head off -- or run her over with my car.

I doubt Izuku would like it very much if I killed his friend.

I was not toying with his emotions. I was trying to sort my own out before adding him into the picture. At one point in time, I would have dropped everything for him, but not anymore. I was grown. I had a pack. I had to worry about myself.

Izuku might be my mate, but we would only end up hurting each other all over again if I tried to be with him now. I must empty some of my baggage before trying to take on Izuku's as well.

I didn't plan on hurting him though. I had quickly discovered that seeing his emerald green orbs ruined with tears made me sick to my stomach in the worst way. It made me and my Alpha uncomfortable when he would sob himself to sleep at night, knowing it was my fault made it all the worse.

If I could never bring myself around to be with him ho a mate should, the least I could do was keep him comfortable and happy until the end of the month. As much as I was already hating Mina, she kind of put things into perspective.

Looking over at Izuku, he was watching me quietly. When I caught him staring, he was quick to widen his eyes as color tainted his neck and cheeks. The tips of his ears turning red as he looked away had me smiling softly and pulling out of the parking lot.

These next few weeks were going to be a train wreck for sure. Not only did my parents loathe the idea of him staying with us, but I already was suffering the effects of our mate bond. The more time I spent around him, the more I wanted to rip his clothes off rather than rip his head off. I wanted to make him mine.

I wanted him badly, but it was only the lust from our bond.

I wanted him, but we were not good for each other.

It was too plain to see -- we were just a bad match.

Not even a mate bond could pull us back together after the damage we seemed to have done to one another. However, while I was driving, I didn't curse the Moon Goddess or the mate pull. I only asked why it was fated that the one person I was meant to love unconditionally and irrevocably, happened to be the one person who I let get close enough to hurt me.

Chapter Text

𝓘𝔃𝓾𝓴𝓾 𝓜𝓲𝓭𝓸𝓻𝓲𝔂𝓪

 

Ever since we left my apartment, Katsuki has been looking at me funny. His youthful features have been morphed by a crease in his forehead that seemed to only worsen every time I noticed him sneaking glances at me from the driver's seat.

Was he worried about bringing me around his family and pack? Perhaps he was regretting doing this? Whatever it may be, it was freaking me out to see him stewing in silence. It had been a few hours on the road already and he had not said one word to me.

Swallowing my nerves, I reached over and lightly poke his thigh, sparking those intense shockwaves of warmth from the contact between two mates. I sucked in a breath as he jumped from those same tingles. The crease in his forehead disappearing momentarily and replaced by surprise.

"What?" He snapped, making me flinch back and sigh. There was a pause as he glanced between me and the road before sighing heavily.

"Sorry, what is it?" He spoke much softer now and I relaxed and picked at my fingers in my lap.

"I - I was wondering what your favorite color is?" I wanted to roll my eyes at my stupid question but to my surprise, Katsuki chuckle, taking my breath away as the lovely sounds filled the car and made my heart flutter.

"Really?" He smirked and shook his head as my lips twitched with a shy smile. "It's orange, same as its always been." He glanced at me for a second before turning his gaze back to the road, taking an exit that sparked a memory.

"How close are we?" I asked as I started to remember little landmarks from my childhood along the sides of the road. Katsuki hummed and drummed his fingers along the steering wheel. The 5 o'clock sunlight lit up his features with a soft orange glow. His cherry-colored eyes showing off little golden flecks within his irises that made me lean closer to get a better look.

"I'd say about 15 minutes." His mouth curved as he spoke, showing off his sharp canines and pearly white teeth. I bit my lip and tilted my head as I studied him. His ash-blond locks of hair were unruly as ever, sticking up in spikes and showing off the buzzed undercut that only added to his mature aesthetic that reminded me he was no longer a child.

I could feel my cheeks warming as my body soaked in my mate's proximity. His scent of caramel and spice filled up the small cab of his car, sending my Omegan nature haywire as I sit surrounded by my mate's scent.

Katsuki shifted in his seat, breaking my intense staring as he pulled into a driveway. The gravel road leading up to a white house has my anxiety spiking. Memories begin flooding my mind of the last time I sat in this driveway, sweating and chewing my lip raw as I thought about entering this home.

His father had attacked me the last time I was here. I had threatened his son and deserved it. Us shifters are very possessive and protective beings, and entering into this territory again would be like a slap in their face.

"Calm down, your distress pheromones are putting me on edge," Katsuki growled lowly, his pupils dilated as he clenched his fists in his lap. "I don't like being controlled by my emotions, especially when it comes to you." He spits out before trying to calm himself.

I hadn't noticed I was freaking out until he spoke, now I could smell my pheromones filling up the car. Katsuki's eyes were dark as his Alpha began pushing for control. Smelling his mate in distress was forcing him to be on guard. Part of me wanted to purr at the sign of affection, but I knew it was misplaced. He does not want to feel these things for me. It was only biology and instinct -- not love.

"Sorry," I mumbled and tried to relax as I pulled back my scent. My hands felt clammy, and I stared outside at the front door. My anxiety was still through the roof as I imagined what would happen the moment I set foot in their home again.

"Let's go, it's been a long-ass drive and I want to go to sleep," Katsuki grunted and opened his door, slipping out, and pulling our luggage from the back seat. I slowly slipped out of the car and wrung my hands as I took a deep breath of fresh air to calm my nerves.

"Come on." He snapped, aggravated. However, I could tell he wasn't mad at me, he was just anxious because I was worked up.

Walking up to the front door had my heart pounding as Katsuki unlocked it and threw it open. I stiffened and stopped my feet from moving. Katsuki entered and drug our suitcases inside before turning and facing me.

My eyes were wide and my breathing ragged. I could feel my fingers going numb with how long I had been picking at the skin under my nails. Katsuki huffed and his eyes soften only slightly before he reached out and grabbed my arm, pulling me inside his home. I could feel the atmosphere change as I entered the territory that was not welcoming of me.

"K-Katsuki!" I whimpered and shook my head, trying to pull out of his grip. However, he was much stronger than me and only dugs his fingers tighter along my arms. It hurt but not bad enough for me to care.

"I shouldn't be here!" I hissed as my Omega pushes forward, like a scared dog backed into a corner. I felt myself tensing up to attack and defend myself.

As if sensing my next move, Katsuki yanked me into his chest and tightened his arms around me, pinning my arms down by my side and forcing my face into his chest.

"Jesus Christ, Midoriya." His words held no venom, and as my face rested pressed into his broad chest, his scent filled my nose and he released a calming scent for me.

Trembling, I nuzzled my face deeper into his chest and whimpered as I greedily inhale his scent. Taking comfort from my mate had been something I always struggled with while being away for so long. Even now it felt foreign to me. Yet I couldn't bring myself to pull away. His much larger hands caged me in as my shaking slows until I can think properly again.

"Dammit, kid. You need to relax; I hate how my body is reacting to you freaking out." Katsuki grumbled but did not pull away either. Our bodies seemed to be stuck together as the warmth pulled us in and our mate bond strengthened from the contact we've been avoiding for so long.

My body relaxed in his arms and I felt myself leaning into his embrace as his arms loosened around me but still holding me close. After a few more seconds of silence, Katsuki stiffened and pushed me away. I felt my heart squeeze in my chest at the rejection, but I held it together as I watched my mate grab our bags and haul them off.

Standing stiffly in the living room, I looked around and noticed the familiar set up of the house. The kitchen that held so many awful memories has been remodeled, making it almost unrecognizable, which I loved considering it made it harder to picture the assault that occurred four years ago.

The walls were painted a soft white that matched the modern furniture and appliances. Taking a few steps into the house, I explored the living room and kitchen, trying to keep myself busy while Katsuki put our things away. I could smell his parents close by and it made me nervous as I peeked around corners -- hoping not to be startled by one or both of them showing up before Katsuki got back to my side.

Thankfully, he was back within a few minutes and I found him leaning against the wall -- watching me.

"So, there is a spare room for you a few doors down from my room." I wondered if my being here was comforting or irritating to Katsuki. I was in his territory as well. I guess the fact that he even let me enter meant that he wasn't too upset with me being around.

"Thank you," I whispered, knowing he could hear me and my wild heart rate as I looked around. The sound of a door shutting had me jumping and sprinting to Katsuki's side. My eyes were blown wide as I stared into the face of Masaru Bakugou exiting his bedroom upstairs and looking over the balcony. His mother was right behind him and I felt myself shrink into Katsuki's side as the shaking starts back up again.

Surprisingly, he didn't shove me away. His arm moved as if to wrap around me, but he froze halfway there and only placed a warm hand on my back. I relaxed under his touch, but my body was on guard. Weakened from the past few years, I knew I didn't stand a chance if Masaru attacked me again.

"It's good to see you're back, son." His father spoke first, shifting his glare from me to his son. His mother gave a wry smile. "I thought I smelt something -- rotten." Masaru shot a glare at me, making me lean back into Katsuki who stiffened at my contact. A soft whimper left my body and has Katsuki pulling me closer unintentionally. I knew his Alpha instincts were kicking in and he was upset that his mate was distressed.

It was not Katsuki who cared, it was his Alpha. But I would take the comfort and protection. What Katsuki said next had my jaw hitting the floor and his parents turning into guppies. Their faces morphed into one of shock that beat even my surprise.

"Look, I know you don't love the idea that Midoriya is here for a few weeks. I am not thrilled either, but I agreed to this, so could you please stop threatening him with your glares. I really don't like how my alpha is reacting to him being upset, it's making me do things I don't really like." Katsuki's hand gripped onto the back of my shirt as he spoke, yet he didn't let me go.

His father raised an eyebrow but nodded and shuffled downstairs. As his parents entered the living room, Katsuki pushed me away some but kept me close by, still feeling the tension in the room.

"Alright, I will play nice, but I don't like you. Don't forget that you haven't earned your place in this family. Katsuki might be giving you a month to woo him or whatnot, but you are still on my shitlist, Midoriya." His father glared at me and his mother only shook her head.

"Jesus, calm down. Izuku is obviously scared of being here. Making him upset is just going to make our son upset right now. We might not have forgiven everything that has happened, but we can be civil, right Masaru?" Mitsuki shot a glare at her husband and Katsuki chuckled humorlessly before brushing past me and walking off towards his room.

"Good, don't kill each other. I'm going to bed." Katsuki gruffed and shuffled to his room. Masaru and Mitsuki both gave me a look over before sighing. Masaru walked off and his wife stayed behind, a small smile on her lips that didn't fully reach her eyes.

"This way, I will show you to your room," She said kindly, although it was forced past tight lips.

"Thank you," I whispered and followed her as she began to lead me into a spare room that was just two doors down from Katsuki's room. She ushered me into the room before giving me a weak smile and left me alone with my thoughts and luggage.

Flopping onto the bed I looked around the room before lying back and closing my eyes. I didn't get attacked as soon as I entered the house. That was one positive thing.

I must have lied there for a long time because I dozed off in my clothes. I was woken up by the sounds of people laughing and shouting outside the house.

It must have been the next day because the sun is up, and my body was sore from lying for so long -- hanging halfway off the bed and still in my jeans. Sliding out of bed, I ran my fingers through my hair and quickly moved into the ensuite bathroom to brush my teeth.

I left my room and headed to the front door where the sounds only grow louder. I could smell Katsuki mixed with other people, spiking my curiosity as I shuffled outside to witness the commotion. My eyes landed on a group of people surrounding Katsuki in the front yard.

The first thing I noticed was a tall man with spiky red hair that was pulling out of an embrace with Katsuki, who surprisingly had a huge grin on his face. Something in me settled when I recognized his description as the kid that Katsuki made friends with while in middle school.

However, my calm didn't last long before my nostrils were flaring as the scent of another Omega hit me. Two Omegas. My eyes shifted as a thin boy with blond hair bolted towards my mate with a huge smile. He flung himself into Katsuki's arms, pressing his face into his shoulder. Katsuki laughed and wrapped his arms around the boy, setting my blood on fire as my Omega hisses at the unmated Omega latching onto my mate.

What tipped my emotions from angry to pissed was when the Omega begins scenting Katsuki as his friends all chat together like it was the most normal thing.

My mate was being covered in another male's scent right in front of my eyes. My teeth began to grind together as my heart stuttered in my chest -- pain filling my body as the anger flooded my veins.

My eyes were locked on the boy with red hair, as he held my gaze with a shocked expression. His huge red eyes locked on mine as I stumbled back into the house and slammed the door shut before hurrying back to my temporary room. My Omegan side howled with distress and my chest throbbed with pain and jealousy.

Was that why Katsuki had been so angry? There was another Omega that had Katsuki's attention? Someone else that had been comforting him while I was away?

Placing my hand over my chest, I couldn't help but rub at the surface, desperate to stop the ache that had been placed there. I know that I had no reason to be so jealous right now. Katsuki was my mate, yes. But we were not together. If he was with someone else -- sure that would hurt and suck, but I would just have to fight harder to gain his affections.

Katsuki was mine. I wanted him to give ma another chance.

My instincts flare and have me pacing my room in an attempt to calm down, and once my body relaxed and the dull throb in my chest became less annoying, I lifted my head and marched off to the showers to get myself presentable. My instincts had me on fire with determination. I needed to present myself better.

I had a mate to catch.

Chapter Text

𝓚𝓪𝓽𝓼𝓾𝓴𝓲 𝓑𝓪𝓴𝓾𝓰𝓸𝓾

It was a surprise, to say the least. Having my friends show up so early to welcome me back after the past two weeks really brightened my mood. It was difficult to sleep with Izuku's scent only a few doors down, and once I fell asleep, my dreams were filled with his face.

"It's so good to see you again, man." Kirishima engulfed me in a warm embrace, and although I am not much of a hugger; these dumbasses were my family. "I had to deal with Denki's winning the whole time." He groaned, pulling out of the hug and patting my back with one of his signature toothy grins.

"I'm sorry I left for so long." A lot had happened and I just needed to settle it before coming home, although that didn't go as planned considering I had brought the problem home with me.

"We understand, Baku!" My friends were always supportive, and I knew it must have been hard for them considering I had started scenting them a while back. It must have been uncomfortable for them when suddenly their Alpha disappeared when we practically lived together. Even though I haven't marked them as pack members, they still felt my absence.

"Speak of the devil," Kirishima muttered with a smirk as I picked up on Denki's scent. Turning around, I barely caught a glimpse of his blond hair before he launched himself into my arms.

Grunting, I wrapped my arms around him and laughed before ruffling his hair. His sweet scent surrounded me, although for some reason I felt my skin itch with the need to push him away. I have never had feelings for Denki, but he was a great friend and I had agreed to be there for him until he found his own Alpha and mate.

One day he would find another Alpha and join their pack. He was an Omega and Omegas are almost guaranteed to be mated with an Alpha. Denki would always be family though, even if one day he moves to another pack.

"I missed you!" Denki purred and nuzzled into my neck, and although I hugged him to me, my body rejected his closeness and Izuku's face flashed in my mind. I slowly removed him from my arms and smiled at him. Denki quickly grabbed my wrist and scented himself. His satisfied smile lingered on his lips.

"I've missed you all, honestly. But enough with all the sappy shit." I groaned when Denki was done scenting, only to snap my head towards the front door of my house when I hear it slam shut.

"Who's the green-haired Omega in your house?" Kirishima asked with a raised eyebrow, only confusing me as I looked at my friends who were all watching me curiously. Kirishima scratched the back of his neck awkwardly and walked over to me.

"Is that..." He trailed off and I sighed while giving him a curt nod before groaning.

"Yeah, that's Izuku Midoriya. He's my -- mate." I said tightly and watched as their faces morphed into pure shock. They didn't know everything that has happened between us, but they did know we had a harsh falling out.

"Damn..." Kiri muttered and patted my back. "That's -- rough, man." He shook his head and I just shrugged out from under his hand, feeling rather weird with their touches all of a sudden.

"You didn't reject him?" His voice was quizzical. I knew that he knew how far my hatred went for Izuku.

"I tried to, but -- Yeah, he will be here for about three weeks." It didn't feel right telling them our personal business right now. I agreed to give Izuku some time to try and win me over, but I doubted I would feel anything other than sexual attraction towards him, and that was just the mate bond forcing us together.

"He seemed pissed, maybe you should go check on him?" Kiri spoke softly, making me glare at him. Why the fuck was he pissed off so early in the morning? Kiri only shrugged and tried to calm me down with a soft smile that only made me roll my eyes and head inside to check on Izuku.

Walking up to the guest room where he would be staying, I could hear the sound of the shower running. So, I walked inside and took a seat on the bed to wait for him.

His scent was heavy in the room, making me calm down quite a bit from my earlier state. I didn't understand why he would wake up pissed off and then go slamming doors and not just come out to say hello to everyone.

I must have been lost in my thoughts because I was startled out when Izuku's shocked squeak suddenly had me looking up. Only to be greeted with the image of Izuku standing there in nothing but a towel, water droplets running down his bare chest and dampening the hem of the white fluffy towel that was hanging dangerously low on his hips.

His cheeks turned the most delicious shade of pink and his eyes widened as we both stared at each other. He made no attempt to move or leave, holding my gaze before he quirked an eyebrow and folded his arms over his chest. His cheeks were still pink even as he tried to play off his embarrassment.

"What are you doing here?" He asked, quickly turning and pulling out some clothes from his suitcase that he had yet to unpack. My eyes roamed his back, following the drips of water that were falling from his wet curls.

He was thin, yet soft, and his waist was small, leading into slightly wider hips. Heat pooled in my stomach as I stared at his figure and I cursed under my breath. The mate pull was forbidding me from tearing my eyes from his pale skin.

"Hello?" Izuku snapped his fingers and held his clothes over his chest now. "Get out, I need to change." He huffed, yet his eyes held a playfulness that I noticed immediately and I cleared my throat. Standing up, I walked to the door.

"Let me know when you're done, we need to talk. I need to introduce you to some people." I quickly left and leaned against the wall, releasing a deep breath and rubbing my hands down my face.

"What the fuck was that?" I grumbled to myself and shook my head before just leaning with my back to the wall. My heart was thumping irregularly in my chest and my face felt hot with embarrassment. Before I could think too much about what just happened, Izuku cracked open his door making me stand up straighter.

He held his door open and motioned me to come in, and for some reason, my heart thumped harder in my chest again. Clearing my throat, I shook my head and watched his face scrunch up in confusion. His nose wrinkled and I crack a smile.

"Come with me, there are some people who you should meet," I told him and quickly walked off to avoid making a fool of myself by staring at him -- and to avoid the sudden urge to shove him into his room and strip him out of those clothes he had just put on. Izuku followed after me as I lead him to the living room where my friends were seated quietly. I knew they heard us coming as they looked at us with curiosity.

Izuku picked at his fingers and looked down at his feet, his posture and display making it clear that he was an Omega -- and a shy one at that. Kirishima smiled his friendly grin while Denki and Jiro sat quietly beside each other -- watching Izuku with a curious expression.

"Everyone, this is Izuku Midoriya. He's going to be staying here for a few weeks so you should get comfortable with each other." I said, noticing how Denki tilted his head and narrowed his eyes at Izuku for a moment. "These are my friends and future pack members, Kirishima, Denki, and Jirou." I pointed out each of them and watched as Izuku looked around and offered a shy smile.

"It's lovely to meet you all." He said softly and I was actually surprised he didn't start stuttering. I looked over at him and watched as he smiled. His dimples were showing briefly before he lowered his head again. It was starting to get awkward with the silence until Kirishima stood up and clapped his hands together loudly, making Izuku jump slightly and shuffle closer to my side.

"Well we don't bite, it's nice to have you here. You'll see a lot of us, we are almost always together now that we've all graduated!" Kiri smiled and stuck his hand out to Izuku who looked stunned but quickly placed his smaller hand into Kirishima's palm. He gave it a shake.

"Thank you." I watched as Kirishima dropped his hand and smiled at me before winking. I gritted my teeth as he shot me a knowing look. Of course, he would see right through the front I had up when it came to the Omega next to me. I knew I would get an earful later.

"Baku, let's watch a movie or something and just relax. It's been like two whole weeks since we've seen you." Denki pouted from the couch and I saw Izuku tense up beside me before he quickly relaxed, making me raise an eyebrow at him but he wasn't looking at me.

"Sure, sounds good." I smiled and shook my head as Jiro got up and bent down to the DVD cabinet. She pulled out a movie that I knew she would go for. Kiri groaned and Denki giggled, making Jiro shoot them a glare.

"What? I like scary movies!" She hissed making Izuku smile a bit. But his expression showed a bit of nervousness. Was he scared of horror films? His eyes zoned in on the DVD in her hand before he nibbled on his bottom lip, making my mouth water as he bit down on his plump lip. Before I could slip down this dangerous slope, Kiri elbowed me and raised an eyebrow in my direction.

"We have time, we can watch a few movies if you guys want to. Just shut it and put the movie on." I grumbled and flopped down on the sofa as Jiro put the movie on and flicked the lights off. Izuku stood there awkwardly and I looked over at him.

"Pick a seat, nerd. Don't just stand there." I rolled my eyes and Denki snickered before flopping down beside me and curling up into my arm. My eyes flashed over to Izuku instantly, much to my own surprise, and I tensed up when I saw him with pink cheeks and a tense jaw. His fists were balled up by his side but he took a deep breath and sighed out loud.

"Right." Izuku finally mumbled and his eyes flickered to the spot to my left that had remained empty. However, before he could claim it, Kiri plopped himself down and made Izuku freeze again before quickly going to sit on the floor with his back to a loveseat beside the sofa. I saw him visibly struggling with something, his eyes were downcast and he pulled his knees to his chest.

Throughout the movie, my eyes barely left Izuku's small frame. My thoughts were confirmed as he jumped and squeaked with the jump scares -- or when something frightening happened. Denki stayed cuddled to my side, burying his face into my arm as Kirishima munched on popcorn and smiled the whole time. The idiot loved these movies, even though he and Jiro made us watch them over and over again.

However, I couldn't get myself to focus on the film. Izuku looked so uncomfortable and halfway through, he got up and excused himself. I watched him walk away with his head hung and his hands wrung in front of him. After a few minutes, I pried myself away from Denki and followed in the direction he left in, needing to know if he was okay.

When I found him, he was leaning against the hallway wall, breathing heavily and rubbing his chest. Moving quickly, I walked over to him and placed my hands on his shoulders. He jumped and gasped. Izuku's eyes are wide and he instantly blushed and started apologizing, only confusing me more.

"What are you apologizing for? What's wrong?" I muttered and found myself rubbing his shoulders while studying him curiously. Izuku trembled and I felt his warmth running through my fingertips as I made contact with his body.

"It's stupid." He muttered and slowly relaxed as I rubbed up and down his arms. Normally, I wouldn't care and would just shrug and walk away, but I found myself staying with him -- keeping my hands on his small shoulders and rubbing.

"I won't laugh." I offered a smile and I watched as he turned red, adding to the soft look he had. I wouldn't even believe that he was older than me with how small he was. "You can tell me," I stated and he sighed while closing his eyes.

"I don't like horror movies." He whispered and turned even redder, and I keep my word. I didn't laugh but I couldn't stop the smirk. I wanted to poke fun at him, however before I could, a small whimper left his lips and I felt my body heat up. My jaw tightened.

My body moved on its own as I slipped my arms around him. I pulled him into my chest just as he started shaking again.

"I'm sorry." I murmured into his hair, feeling oddly natural holding him in my arms. Izuku relaxed into my embrace and just pressed his face into my chest.

"I didn't mean to make you sit there alone through that." For some reason, I felt bad for leaving him like that. I knew something was wrong; he was jumping and all balled up.

"It's fine. I'm an adult, I should be able to handle it." He chuckles humorlessly. There was a bitter tone to his voice as he put himself down -- something he had a bad habit of doing I've noticed.

However, I just shook my head and sighed. Even I forget that and he may be an adult but he was still an Omega. The softer and more gentle of the secondary genders. They aren't weak and lesser than the rest of us, but they did require more attention and care -- It was just facts.

If we were going to get through these few weeks, we needed to be civil.

I needed to watch out for him. He's an Omega and needed my attention -- just as Denki did. However, with him wrapped in my arms, I couldn't compare him to Denki. I knew damn well that the way my body heated up with his smaller frame pressed close to mine was because -- like it or not -- he was my mate.

With Denki, it was like taking care of a friend or family member.

With Izuku, I couldn't ignore the pleasure I received from holding him. Even if I hated feeling this way, I could no longer ignore it. Not if I wanted him to heal enough for us to end this madness. Pulling him gently from my arms, I took us back to the living room where I sat down beside him on the floor and had him lean against me.

He was quiet now, and so was I as I thought about the situation. I just needed to help Izuku get better and let him get over his idea of us being mates. In a few weeks, he would be gone and I could go back to my own life.

The thought of that made my heart throb uncomfortably in my chest. I grind my teeth, annoyed that he was already weaving his way back into my life when I had just gotten over him.

I thought this would be easier.

Chapter Text

𝓘𝔃𝓾𝓴𝓾 𝓜𝓲𝓭𝓸𝓻𝓲𝔂𝓪

 

"So Izuku..." Mitsuki awkwardly pushed her food around on her dinner plate. "What do you do for work?" She has been the only one trying to make conversation with me, and although it was never natural conversations, she did try and be polite around me. Her husband, on the other hand, wasn't so nice and never once tried to speak to me.

It was slightly weird considering Masaru used to be really kind to me. I guess it makes sense considering what I did to his son. Grimacing, I tried to rid myself of those thoughts and reply to Katsuki's mother.

"I am a writer and editor for a publishing company," I replied, chancing a glance at Katsuki, who had been mindlessly picking at his food. Actually, he had been avoiding the conversation as much as possible. I had been here three days and each night, we all sat and had dinner together like an awkward family.

"That's lovely, does it pay well?" She asked, instantly putting me on edge. It was no secret that my line of work didn't make the best money. Would she judge me for that? I was older than Katsuki. But considering our dynamics, shouldn't he be the one to provide for me? Why did I feel like I should be the one looking after him still? I shook my head subtly, needing to clear the clutter that rattled inside my brain. Katsuki and I were not together. No one was taking care of, or providing for, anyone.

"It's decent, enough to support myself." I wanted to stick my fork in my eye
Instead, I just shoved the cutlery in my mouth and chewed my food. Mitsuki hummed and went back to eating.

After dinner, I offered to help with dishes, like every night, and like every night I am turned down and told to go relax or whatnot. I have been seriously trying to warm up to his friends and parents, and no one seemed to really like me being here. The one guy that Katsuki hangs out with the most is Kirishima, and he has been quite friendly to me.

The two Omegas of the group never really spoke to me. It was odd considering most Omegas felt comfortable around other Omegas. Why was I any different?

Sliding onto the sofa, I sighed and tucked my legs under myself to keep warm. It was quite chilly inside and although I have been feeling better and eating more, I haven't put on much weight. The cold still bothered me more than it should have. Distracting myself, I pulled out my cell and googled date ideas. I wanted to ask Katsuki out on a date. I mean, he agreed to let me court him for a month, saying he wouldn't push me out of his life, but would he agree to a date with me?

It was weird enough that the Omega of our pairing was asking the Alpha out, but I was older and the one doing the chasing. It just felt unnatural and had me extra nervous.

I have looked at restaurants, movies, clubs, bowling, arcades, and more. Nothing really seemed like things the Alpha would enjoy doing. The fact was, I didn't know much about him. I needed to spend more time around him just talking. Maybe he would open up about something and give me a clue.

Speak of the devil and he shall appear.

I quickly put my phone away and gave a smile towards Katsuki who was walking into the living room wearing grey sweats and a black tank top that had my mouth watering. I quickly scolded myself and looked away down at my lap. A slight chill ran down my arms from the air conditioning.

Before Katsuki sat down, he grabbed a blanket from the love seat and, without saying a word, walked over to me and draped the blanket over my body. My mouth fell open, but I quickly closed it, not wanting to look like a fool.

"Thanks," I mumbled, my cheeks heated up from the kind gesture. He grunted softly as his reply and sat down beside me -- shocking me again as he willing at beside me.

"I am going out tomorrow with the guys," Katsuki says, looking down at his phone. I assumed he meant his friends, considering there was a girl in the group. I didn't say anything, slightly disappointed that he would leave me here alone with his parents.

"Okay," I replied softly and looked over at him. He put his phone in his lap and looked up at me, stealing my breath away as his piercing red eyes held me.

"You want to tag along?" He asked.

Well, fuck -- color me stoked.

***

The day trip they had planned was to go to a lake. Funny enough, it was the same lake that I took Katsuki to one summer. The last time we had been there was the same day my heat had hit -- and ruined the next four years of our lives.

I tried not to let the bad memories get to me, but it was near impossible when I was suddenly thrown into a situation with my shirtless, and dripping wet, mate. He stirred up feeling inside me that I had been fighting for over four years. The lust that I had pushed away all those years came crashing down on me as I watched the ash-blond out in the water with his friends.

Denki made me uncomfortable. The way he hung around Katsuki all the time and touched him had me wanting to rip his hands off his lanky body and cry at the same time. I hated being controlled by my emotions like this. But it was hard when Denki almost seemed to be doing it on purpose.

Like right now. I had been watching them all from the shore, not quite feeling comfortable inside their close-knit circle of friends. But still, I enjoyed being near my mate. However, I had to watch while Denki kept throwing me glances every time he laid hands on Katsuki.

The worst part of it was, Katsuki seemed not to care that Denki was all over him, which only meant that the behavior was normal for them. The jealousy and hurt in my chest intensified when I saw Denki jump into Katsuki's arms and wrap his pale legs around my mate's waist. My anger rose in my chest and I swore I would break a tooth from how hard I was grinding my teeth.

What tipped the scale was when I saw the cheeky fucker grin at me from over Katsuki's shoulder, making my insides twist and my Omegan nature howl with discomfort. I wanted to cry, to let my emotions take over and show just how much of a weak Omega I really was.

However, I glared right back and stood up. Wanting to rub it in his dumbass face, I called over to Katsuki.

"Hey Kat," I shouted and grinned when he instantly let go of Denki, dropping him down into the water. He turned to face me with curious eyes.

"I'm gonna come join you guys," I spoke loudly as I locked eyes with Katsuki who smiled a little and nodded. Before he could look away, I gripped the bottom of my shirt and tugged it off swiftly before dropping it to the ground and walking toward the water with a satisfied smirk on my face.

Denki was red in the face and glaring while Katsuki's mouth had slightly parted and his eyes quickly raked over my body before he looked away, trying to play it off that he didn't just eye fuck me. I shot a smirk at Denki who curled his lip at me and turned away, pouting. What a childish move, I thought with a petty grin on my face.

Walking into the water, I moved right up to Katsuki and smiled at him. He only smirked back at me while leaning down. His lips got so close to my ear that I could feel his warm breath tickle my skin and it sent shivers along my spine.

"I saw that," Katsuki whispered, making me gulp. I pulled away slightly, my cheeks burned and my heart thumped wildly. I knew Kat could hear my heart about to collapse, only adding to his cheeky grin.

"I don't know what you are talking about," I replied coyly, folding my arms across my chest and shooting a glare at Denki who was still watching us with narrowed eyes. Katsuki chuckled by my side, sending warmth to my core. Goddess, he sounded so sexy when he laughed. I tried to control myself, but I swore I whimpered under my breath.

"Don't play dumb." Katsuki's hand brushed my exposed side under the water, sending lovely jolts through my body and straight to my member. I gasped and pulled away some, forcing myself to roll my lip between my teeth in order to hold back a moan.

"You forget, I can smell you." Katsuki trailed his fingers over my side and around to my lower back before retreating and stepping away like he didn't just intentionally turn me on.

"Green doesn't suit you." He smirked playfully before walking off towards Kirishima with a blow-up beach ball.

Green doesn't suit me? Was he talking about my hair? Instinctively, my hands go up to my hair just as I caught the ash-blond throwing me a smirk, making me realize he was being smart with me. He means jealousy. Green with envy. What a little shit -- I huffed and shook my head, both confused and turned on by his sudden flirting with me.

What just happened?

***

"Let's go get food, I am starving!" Kirishima groaned and Katsuki rolled his eyes. After Kat's little flirting spell he had in the lake, he went back to ignoring me for the most part, and thank Goddess we were all underwater or else I would have had an embarrassing problem in my swim bottoms.

"You're always starving, how are you not fat?" Jiro spoke up, surprising me as she never really spoke unless it was with Kirishima. Those two seemed to get along well; she normally stayed with Denki or Kirishima the majority of the time.

"I have a high metabolism, that's all." Kirishima grinned and Jiro rolled her eyes and goes back to being quiet while Katsuki dried off with a blue towel. He walked over to me and wrapped a fresh towel around my shoulders before walking off, leaving me speechless and shocked yet again by his random acts of caring.

"You both shut up and let's go get food," Katsuki smirked and hopped into his car, right after throwing his towel in the seat to keep his fabric from getting wet. We all brought clothes, but we never changed out of our swim clothes. I just pulled my shirt on after I dried my curls and patted my bottoms dry the best that I could.

"That's what I am talking about!" Kirishima jumped into the front seat, leaving me in the back with the other Omegas. I normally wouldn't mind, but I was already on a short fuse with the blond one that kept putting hands on my mate. Katsuki seemed to notice as he gave me a sly grin through the rearview mirror.

Playing nice, I sat quietly for the whole ride, occasionally catching Katsuki glancing at me through the mirror. This only seemed to piss off the little Omega beside me, annoying the hell out of me and making it hard for me not to say something.

It wasn't until Denki started talking to me, that I lost a bit of my cool.

"So, Midoriya..." He said my last name slowly, drawing it out of his lips and instantly spiking my blood pressure. "I hope you and Katsuki are patching things up." I felt my face get hot as I clenched my fists in my lap.

I didn't say anything as the car goes deathly quiet. Even Katsuki seemed stunned as his eyes dart to mine through the mirror. I clenched my teeth. What did Katsuki tell them about our history?

"I heard you guys had a -- harsh falling out," Denki smirked over at me, making me grind my teeth.

"That's enough, Denki," Katsuki warned and for a moment I relaxed, thinking that the little kid would stop pestering me when I was trying to be on my best behavior. However, that didn't happen.

"What? I just wanted to get to know the tramp that had my Alpha so hurt for such a long time." Denki sneered at me and that's when I lost it.

My fist went flying out faster than I could process. It connected to his jaw with a sickly crack as I started unbuckling my belt with my free hand. I was snarling with anger. I tried to play nice for three days but he had been pushing me to my limit and now all I wanted to do was knock his stupid lights out.

"Fuck you!" I growled and launched myself at Denki who was -- unfortunately for him -- right beside me. He had been toying with me for days, always sitting on Katsuki's lap, hugging him, touching him, flirting with him, and taunting me. I didn't know what took over, but my Omega was livid and was seeing red.

I didn't hear or feel the car being pulled over until I was being ripped out of the back seat and onto the side of a secluded road. I went to swing at the blond Omega again but was caught by Katsuki who was growling as Kirishima held Denki back.

"Let me go," I growled and tried to shake off Katsuki who just gripped me tighter, making me hiss out in pain. Denki glared at me, growling and thrashing in Kirishima's grip.

"What the fuck has gotten into you both?" Katsuki barked and I just glared at Denki, waiting for him to reply. However, I was stunned when Katsuki jerked me back and walked over to Denki and checked his face where I had hit him.

Pain erupted from within as jealousy reared its ugly head again.

"Are you fucking kidding me?" I shout, my eyes wide and filling with tears. "He has been fucking with me for days!" I shouted, the tears threatening to spill over, so I dashed them away with my arm. Katsuki looked back at me with a furrowed brow.

"What?" He spoke with an exasperated sigh. Denki only glared and curls his lip at me, threatening me as I tried to hold myself back from attacking him again. My Omegan instincts were on edge and begging me to beat his fucking ass.

"I didn't do anything to you, slut." Denki spat and before I could lunge at him, a loud smack was heard and I froze in my spot. My eyes widened as Kirishima stood in front of Denki who was now holding his cheek with a stunned look on his face.

"Don't disrespect our Alpha like that," Kirishima spoke dryly, suddenly surprising us all with his serious tone.

"Did you just smack me?" Denki asked ludicrously. His eyes were still wide as Katsuki stood there stunned and my anger faded to confusion.

"Don't call our Alpha's mate a slut. You are disrespecting Katsuki by doing that. All those side comments in the car, Izuku deserved to hit you. You shouldn't be pushing him like that, it isn't your place." Kirishima growled out before sighing, obviously trying to relax. "Katsuki's relationship with his mate is not our business, let them handle it and know your place." He finished before stepping aside and looking at me.

"I am sorry for his behavior," Kirishima apologized before looking at Katsuki who had a hard look on his face. He only nodded at the redhead before cutting me a quick glance that told me we were not done talking about this.

The rest of the ride home was silent as Kirishima gave up his seat and let me sit up front as he sat in the back between Denki and Jiro. Jiro had been silent the whole argument, just sitting there watching intensely, never once picking sides. It was odd; everything was odd.

Although I was grateful to Kirishima for standing up for me, I knew that I only set myself back in Katsuki's eyes. I let my instincts get the best of me -- The same thing that made me lose Katsuki in the first place. I only showed that I am not worthy of his trust. I hurt his pack members and made him mad at me.

At least, I think he was mad at me. He hasn't said a word to me, only given me glances that told me just enough. I would be getting an earful when we got home. Well, not my home. No matter how much older I am, the look in Katsuki's eyes had me sitting quietly with my head hung in submission. I didn't want to fight with Kat anymore. But I just had to go and lose control.

Again.

Chapter Text

𝓚𝓪𝓽𝓼𝓾𝓴𝓲 𝓑𝓪𝓴𝓾𝓰𝓸𝓾

 

Izuku had hit Denki.

Punched him square in the jaw.

Driving home, I could barely wrap my head around what had happened. My first reaction when it happened was to get him away from Denki because he was my friend. I had no clue why Izuku snapped like that. It was almost like he wasn't himself and he was acting on instinct -- an all too familiar look in his eyes that brought back unwanted memories.

It was only when Kirishima smacked Denki and put him in his place that the situation became clear. Izuku was jealous, I knew this. Hell, I even teased him about it at the lake. I worked him up and flirted with him before going back to ignoring him.

Was this my fault for messing with him? Surely my teasing didn't set him off like that. Izuku had almost cried when I went to check on Denki, screaming at me and saying that Denki had been messing with him for the past few days. I hadn't noticed Denki being rude to Izuku until he called him a tramp and a slut.

When I had dropped off the guys at their houses and it was just Izuku and in left in the car, he seemed to relax some. I wanted to talk to him, but I knew that going back into the house with my parents when we both were upset would only cause problems.

When we arrived home, I shut the car off and activated the child lock on his door so he couldn't get out. His whole body tensed up at the click of the lock and he hung his head. He has been staring at his lap for almost an hour now.

Sighing, I unbuckle and lean back in the seat, running my hand down my face and taking a deep breath.

"What happened back there?" I asked, not bothering to look at him. I could practically feel that he hasn't looked up from his lap. The seconds ticked on and I slammed my hands to the steering wheel in frustration. Why the hell was everything so fuckin' complicated.

Izuku jumped and looked over at me, making me meet his gaze. His eyes were wide as distress pheromones filled the area around us.

"Fuck, just tell me what that was all about. You hit my friend, Midoriya." I growled lowly and watched as anger build behind his eyes. Anger that he was desperately trying to keep bottled up. "I'm not letting you out of the car unless you talk to me," I said seriously and watch his eyes fade back to that blank stare as he looked at his lap again, not saying a word.

"For fuck's sake..." I groaned quietly and looked at him. He is being ridiculous, but he looked upset about something, almost lifeless with his blank expression and sad eyes. "Talk to me," I said a bit louder and when he doesn't answer I reach over and grab his chin stiffly and turn his head towards me.

His eyes widen and he flinches, making a sharp pain fill my chest that I brush off quickly.

Izuku stares at me with those big eyes that are swimming with worry, his cheeks are painted a perfect shade of pink as his gaze lands anywhere other than my face. I can feel the worry, shame, and embarrassment rolling off him in waves, confusing me even more. My body warms at the contact with my mate, even Izuku seems to lean into my grip that's tight on his chin.

I relax my hand but don't pull away. Instead, I slid my hand over his jaw and cupped the side of his face, making his eyes flutter shut for a moment before he quickly pulled his face away and looked down at his lap -- hiding from me again.

Clearing my throat, I tried to ignore the way my heart was beating and how the need to touch him again bothers me with our proximity.

"Come on..." I spoke gently this time. "I'm not mad at you; I just want to understand." I sighed and shake my head. I wasn't mad at him, not anymore. I know he must have had a reason to lash out like that. I couldn't pretend that Izuku was some monster anymore, not when I knew the facts from that night.

Izuku wasn't a monster who did those things to me on purpose. Instincts are a cruel mistress that, because of our biology, forces us to act ways that we don't always want to act. I had to accept that Izuku was controlled by instincts when he touched me like that.

"I'm sorry..." His voice was soft and broken as fear emits from his every pore. "I didn't mean to..." He sighs and shakes his head, still never lifting it from its bowed form.

"What made you lash out like that?" I asked, trying to keep my tone calm and soft. The Omega in him was stressed and had me stressed as well as I hear Izuku whimper making me watch him as he shakes his head again.

"I... didn't like it..." He whispers, his fists balling up in his lap as he struggles for words.

Reaching over, I tap my finger under his chin, startling him slightly and making him lift his head and looked at me. His eyes were dark with worry, his cheeks still stained pink. I let my finger trace over his jaw before moving away, I just couldn't help myself.

"Didn't like what?" I asked settling my hands in my lap so I don't touch him anymore. Izuku blinked, a bit dazed from my touch it seemed, and nibbled on his lip.

"The way he was... touching you..." His voice was barely a whisper and for a moment I don't think I heard him right.

"What?" I asked lowly, unsure if I heard him correctly as it settles in. Izuku groans softly and puts his head in his hands, embarrassment rolling off him.

"Don't make me say it again..." He whimpered making me smirk slightly before wiping it off my face.

"Were you -- and don't hit me or anything -- but were you -- jealous?" I asked carefully, trying not to tease him after I already messed with him over his jealousy earlier today. Izuku shakes his head but glanced up and shot me a glare.

"Yes! I was jealous and I couldn't help it. My emotions were going crazy and after the past few days with Denki shooting me smirks every time he touched you, I lost it, okay?" He said, getting louder as the rant continues.

"And then earlier, you knew I was jealous, and you teased me for it! You got me worked up and then I had to watch Denki be all over you. My instincts were driving me crazy and then he called me a slut! I've never even kissed anyone! He's the one hanging all over my mate!" Izuku pants when he finally finishes his rant. His eyes were wide as he sits there trembling slightly, his face flushed as he tries to calm down.

I had never heard him speak so fast in my life, his whole body seemed to shake with energy, and I could hear his heart hammering in his chest.

"Go ahead and laugh." He hisses and turned away, trying to hide his face, but I find myself smiling although his words don't amuse me. I feel bad if I made anything worse for him today; I let my hormones get the best of me when I had teased him like that over being jealous. I didn't realize it was so serious.

"I'm not laughing," I said softly but Izuku only huffs and looked out the window. "Hey, I'm not," I spoke firmly while gently grabbing his face and making him looked at me again.

"He's been doing it on purpose, Katsuki." Izuku whimpered and leaned his face into my hand, shutting his eyes as his eyebrows furrow in frustration. Why am I touching him like this right now? Why had I been touching him so damn much today in general?

"I didn't know, honestly," I said softly, trying to calm him down and push away my stray thoughts about how fuckin' soft I am being over the one damn person I had been pissed at for years.

I was being honest with him, though. I didn't know Denki had been taunting him like that and I wouldn't have let that continue if I had known he was instigating that type of thing with Izuku.

"You don't stop him from being all over you though." Izuku sighs and pushes my hand away from his face gently. "Look, I know you're not happy with this, I get it, but I couldn't help the way my... biology reacts to you. I don't like feeling jealous over something that isn't mine!" Izuku snaps although his eyes shine with unshed tears. He takes a deep breath.

"So," He sighs out heavily. "If you're not going to stop him from being all over you, then just don't do it around me. I hate how high strung you seem to make me." Izuku breathed seriously, his face falling as his eyes lower back to his lap.

Had how close Denki has been with me been bothering him that much? I guess how he snapped like that proved it that he was worked up, Izuku rarely snapped and lost control like that.

"Is the mate pull bothering you that much?" I asked before I can stop myself. This seems to take him off guard as he slowly turns to face me, his face holding a serious expression that has me sucking in a deep breath without realizing it.

"Katsuki..." He sighs, his face relaxing some as his hand timidly reaches out and strokes my jaw, sending shivers down my spine before he quickly pulls back and his eyes focus again. I couldn't even move away from his touch; my body froze at the contact.

"I had known you to be my mate for four years now." He whispers and gives a sad chuckle. "At first, I didn't accept it, but as the years went by, I began to welcome it." Izuku sighs again and shakes his head, a smile tugging the corners of his mouth.

"The mate pull has been bothering me since day one," Izuku admits quietly and I let his words sink in. Izuku has been struggling with the mate pull for years, I had only been feeling it for a few weeks since I turned 18. How was Izuku so calm around me right now? Well, I guess he isn't that calm considering he punched Denki in the face today over jealousy.

"I'm sorry," I sighed softly. "I forget you've been struggling for so long with all this mating shit." I sighed and unlock the doors so he could leave if he wanted to.

It's quiet for a while and I see Izuku shiver from the corner of my eyes. He's been cold lately, and today was the first time I had seen him without a shirt. His body was so thin that I could see his ribs pressed against his flesh. He had been eating more since I was around and even sleeping better, so why was he still so unhealthy looking?

"Are you sick?" I asked suddenly, remembering that I asked the same question a few weeks ago and he snapped at me for it. Maybe now was not the best time to ask that again, but Izuku's and Mina's conversation before we left Izuku's apartment has been playing in my mind for days.

They had been talking about withdrawals and symptoms, saying something about Izuku taking something for a while and just now stopping. Did Izuku have some sickness or was it drugs he had been taking? Of course, I wasn't supposed to hear that conversation, but for some reason, it was worrying me greatly.

Izuku hesitated, looking caught off guard by the question before shaking his head.

"No, I'm not sick." The sound of his voice made it near impossible not to read further into it. He may not be sick, but something was wrong. Izuku was lying, his ears always go red when he lies, it's been that way since we met as children.

"Bullshit," I stated quietly, not wanting to upset him but also not wanting him to lie to me. We had to get along for the next few weeks, he was supposed to be winning me over, right?

"It's not bullshit..." Izuku mumbled and plays with his fingers, obviously uncomfortable by the conversation. Not wanting to push him too far, I sighed and lifted my hand in surrender.

"Okay, I won't pry. Just know you can talk to me." I've never been one for reassuring others or comforting people, but Izuku was different. I don't know if it's because we are mate, or if I am just missing the way things used to be between us, but I don't want him to be sick or hurting. I want him to talk to me. I want to take care of him, even if it's just temporary.

It will be temporary; it has to be.

"Thank you," Izuku whispers and picks at his fingers. I reach over and take his smaller hands into mine, stopping his nervous picking, and making his breath hitch as he blushes deeply. Izuku smiles at our hands and for some reason, I don't pull away, his hands feel nice inside of mine.

"I will try and have Denki tone it down with his clinginess, okay? He is used to being the center of attention, but I don't want you to be uncomfortable." I was still peaking softly and watching as he bit down on his lip and nodded.

Izuku was silent for a moment before his brows knit together and he opens his mouth, snapping it shut once or twice as if to speak. He groans in frustration before squeezing my hand absentmindedly.

"Have you... been with him... before?" Izuku said in a hushed tone, his voice cracking at the end as his cheeks redden, his hands breaking out in a nervous sweat.

I knew it was Izuku's jealously talking, or maybe his insecurities? I don't know, it's not like we are together, but he was my mate. I guess he couldn't help but worry about those things, after all, he said he has never even kissed someone before. Part of me warmed when he had said that during his little rant, but I pushed it aside.

"Like romantically?" I ask, wanting to clarify. I had kissed Denki quite a few times over the past few months, but after that first make-out session in my car, we had never taken it that far again. I only kissed him when we were particularly close while scenting. It was never anything serious, we both just needed or wanted the physical contact whenever Denki and I kissed.

Denki said he didn't have feelings for me, and I told him I didn't have feelings for him as well. However, now that Izuku was here, I feel guilty for all those kisses, and although Izuku and I are not an item, the feeling of having a mate has my body ridden with guilt for touching Denki like that.

The blushing Omega in the seat next to me seeming all the better; his lips looking sweeter, fuller, and more inviting than Denki's ever had.

My silence must have been taken the wrong way as Izuku's body tensed up, his eyes screwing shut as waves of chocked-back pain emits from his body and before Izuku could reach for the door handle, I reached out, grabbing his arms and pulling him back to me sharply.

I never had feelings for Denki -- not like that, at least.

I wanted to tell Izuku that there, tell him that there may have been times where I lusted after Denki, just because he was an attractive Omega showing me attention, but I never wanted to be with him. I had always wanted my mate, but I couldn't make myself speak for some reason.

A small whimper leaves his lips as I realize I had pulled too him hard and he was now pressed to my chest, his hands placed on my shoulders to keep himself propped up. His eyes are clenched shut as the sadness radiate off him. Just how bad has this mate pull been messing with him?

My eyes zone in on Izuku's perfectly plump lips, swollen from his constant nervous nibbling and his face and body clearly show his misunderstanding. Izuku's whole body trembles as I hold him close, his lower half bent over the middle console that was resting between our bodies in the confined space.

Sliding my hands up his arms, I cup his face, my hands holding tightly along the pale yet flushed skin of his cheeks, my breath hitching in my throat and before I can think twice, I am leaning forward, closing the gap between us and pressing my lips to his mouth quickly and with a passion that I am unfamiliar with.

His body jolts in surprise as my heart stutters in my chest as those lovely sparks tingle down my spine, the shivers and sparks that only Izuku's touch provides, no matter how much I hate it.

The atmosphere around us goes oddly quiet and still, like the moment between lightning and thunder, waiting for the loud crash of the storm that will surely pull us apart and make us realize the mistake we are making right now.

However, it doesn't come.

The thunder doesn't crack the shell we've wrapped ourselves in, and I find myself pressing closer to him. The only thing breaking the stillness in the air was when Izuku's hands slide down from my shoulders and ball into fists in the front of my shirt as his lips part open with a tiny gasp of surprise that has heat boiling in my core and my fingers curling along his jaw, my fingernails scraping, digging lightly along the soft flesh there as my body practically buzzes.

My lips begin to move, tasting him and forgetting for just a moment the whole world around us as Izuku pushes closer and molds his chest against mine. His lips are inexperienced and hungry as they keep searching mine frantically as if I would disappear. It hits me that Izuku might really feel that way, he probably fears that I could snap back to reality and push him away any moment. I should, but I didn't.

I couldn't.

Izuku brings his fingers up from my shirt and into my hair, our lips slotting together perfectly as he tangles his thin fingers into the strand at the back of my head forcing a low groan passing my lips before I could begin to reel it back in. My groan followed by a small whine from Izuku that seems to break the spell he was under.

Izuku suddenly gasps and pulls his lips from mine with a pop, my eyes snapping open to see his flushed and fearful face.

He jumps back, slamming into the car door right after his fingers unwound from my hair and flew to his mouth, where both hands covered his lips, eyes blown wide with pupils dilated.

My heart pounds behind my ribs, as does his. I can hear it beating frantically and I find myself licking my lips, I can still taste him there. He tastes sweet like honey that blends so well with his natural pheromones of strawberries and cream. The scent was thick -- mixed with the smell of his arousal and -- fear. It was clouding my mind and confusing me. What the fuck did I just do?

However, before I can blink back to the reality of what I just did, Izuku's hand grabs at the door handle and he yanks the car door open, stumbling out of drunkenly as I call out to him in surprise. I jumped out of the car, my own shock keeping me in a heavy fog of confusion.

"Izuku!" I shouted as he stumbled back with wide eyes before turning around and taking off running down the road, past the other houses of my neighborhood.

"Where are you going?" I shouted after him, but he didn't reply or turn around. The heavy scent of his distress leaving a trail behind him as he sprints off, but no matter how much I want to, I couldn't seem to make myself follow him, or even move.

My feet are planted to the ground as I watch him disappear down the road, my own fingers mindlessly moving up and running along my lips. I had never felt something like that before, the warmth and emotion behind the frantic moving of our lips had me dazed and in a state of bliss.

During the kiss, for a moment, I had forgotten why I was ever mad at Izuku. The only thing on my mind while we were inside that car was Izuku, wanting him, needing him, wanting to pull him closer, needing to hear his breathy whines one more time.

I didn't want it to stop.

The fact that I didn't stop, or want to stop, had me squeezing my eyes shut in frustration as the taste of Izuku's lips lingered on my mouth. Why didn't I stop that from happening? Why did I kiss him to begin with? Kissing Denki never felt like that, and as the intensity of the heated moment began to finally fade away, the reality set in and I groaned in frustration.

"What the fuck..." I sighed heavily, rubbing my hands down my face as if that would wipe away the lingering feel of Izuku's lips.

Fun fact -- it didn't work.

Chapter Text

𝓘𝔃𝓾𝓴𝓾 𝓜𝓲𝓭𝓸𝓻𝓲𝔂𝓪

 

Katsuki kissed me.

I kept running even as he yelled after me, I didn't want to turn back and see the disappointment. I was repulsed with how that simple kiss threw my whole world on its head and shredded every ounce of self-control I had.

I had dreamed of the day when my mate would kiss me, and it was nothing like that. I wasn't expecting it, we had been arguing and I was upset. My mate had practically told me he had been messing around with Denki over the years. He didn't outright say it, but the way his face clouded over when I asked, spoke all the things he wasn't going to.

It had hurt, and then his lips came crashing down on mine, stealing my breath away and forcing my whole body through a system reboot. His hands didn't push me away when I clung to him; Katsuki didn't seem repulsed when I kissed him back.

He pulled me closer and kissed me deeper, keeping up with the way my inexperienced lips brushed over his mouth. A hunger that I had never felt before washed over me as we kissed and I was losing control. I wanted him. Goddammit, I wanted him so badly. How could I have been so reckless? I should have pulled away sooner.

When Katsuki groaned into my mouth, coaxing a small and needy whine from my lungs, I broke free. Things were going too far -- too fast -- and if I didn't stop when I had, who knows what I would have done. The last time I lost control with my mate, I did something I wholeheartedly regretted.

I couldn't afford to lose control with him -- not ever again.

My feet pound along the pavement as I sought out the familiar white house a few blocks away from Katsuki's home. The one place where I could be myself without judgment. Yet, I haven't been there in four years. I hadn't even told my mother about coming back here with Katsuki. I was so used to being on my own that I had forgotten my own mother.

Tears blur my vision as I keep running, burning off the energy and adrenaline that pulsed my veins. My body was on fire, nothing like the terrible heat that would come to me every 6 months, this heat was sizzling and pleasurable along my skin and pooling in my stomach, a constant reminder of the way Katsuki's hands grabbed at my face as he pulled me closer -- kissing me deeper.

A shiver raked through my body as I stumbled along the pavement, barely catching my footing and avoiding faceplanting on the sidewalk. Panting, I dashed at my eyes to clear my vision from tears. I start to recognize where I was as my gaze fell onto the familiar white house and the navy blue door of my childhood home.

My breathing, still ragged, began to even out as I gulped in the air to soothe my burning lungs. I haven't run like that in forever. Being weakened by the absence of my mate as well as those damn heat-aids, I never got back into my active life. I used to love hiking and swimming, now I couldn't run a few blocks without feeling as if my body would give out on me.

Making my way up to the house, I knocked on the door while my breathing started to even out and my lungs stopped burning. The familiar scent of my mother was all around the property, filling my body with a calmness that I needed right now.

When I was about to knock again, I hear the click of my mother's high heels and the jiggle of the door handle. Her heart was going wild in her chest and I know she could tell it was me. I haven't seen her in six months.

Last Christmas, when I was really sick, she spent Christmas up there with our family friends, the same place I had been staying over breaks since I couldn't come home. It was lovely to see her, but I was so depressed and sick that I barely spent any time with her other than meals.

The door swung open and my mother dove into my arms. Her sweet floral perfume swaddled me as her natural scent brought me the familiar comfort I so desperately craved right now.

"Izuku!" She started as her thin arms wrapped around my neck. My own were clutching around her waist. "What are you doing here?" She sobbed as my eyes filled with tears and spilled down my cheeks. I pressed my face into her hair and squeezed her tighter.

"Mom," I sighed and breathed deeply, filling my lungs with her scent. She pulled back and gently tugged me inside, shutting the front door and pulling me back into her arms. A smile formed on my lips as I rubbed her back soothingly.

"I'm sorry," I whispered and shook my head. I should have told her I was coming back for a while. I should have made more of an effort to speak with her over the years.

"Oh honey, you don't need to apologize." She cooed and stroked my hair for a moment while I basked in the comfort of her arms before I pulled back and sighed.

"I should have called..." I mumbled as she shushed me with a shake of her head.

"No, no, it's fine, son. I'm so glad you're back." She patted my shoulder and pulled me off to the living room where we take a seat. She looked at me, questions swarming behind her eyes. It was clear that she wanted to know what's going on.

"I guess we need to catch up..." I started warily as she grasped my hands in hers and rubbed her fingers over my knuckles to soothe me. Not saying a word, she waited for me to continue.

I told her everything. I told her about Katsuki finding out we were mates and how he almost rejected me. She tensed up when I told her how I had almost died, anger and sadness rolling off her in waves as I tell her how angry Katsuki was. I tell her about the progress we have made, and how he was giving me a month to change his mind about our mating before he decided to reject me or not.

I told her about today and about the trip to the lake, and how Katsuki was showing me attention and had even flirted with me. I smiled through that -- a faint blush coated my cheeks but I knew my mom wouldn't judge me.

I grew grim when I explained how Denki had been taunting me over the past few days. My emotions were rising as I explained to her how the other Omega had been hanging all over Kat and rubbing it in my face. My mom scoffed and showed her disapproval of his actions. Yet she stayed silent for the most part, just letting me talk and get everything out.

My voice dropped as I recounted the kiss -- telling her how it had confused me and scared me half to death when Katsuki pulled me closer instead of pushing me away. More importantly, he kissed me. I didn't initiate it. My cheeks flushed as my mother smiled at me, brushing her fingers over my hands that clung to her smaller fingers.

"Why did you run away?" She asked softly after I finished catching her up on everything. I shrugged my shoulders and sighed.

"I was losing control, mom. He makes me feel... vulnerable." I whispered, my body warming up with thoughts of my mate. "I lost control with him once, I can't do it again, mom. I can't -- lose him." I groaned and my eyes filled with pain as memories of that night filled my mind.

"Honey, that was a long time ago..." She cooed gently and squeezed my hand as if to remind me that I was here now, and not back there -- in that kitchen -- with that man and Katsuki.

"I know that. I know." I sighed and pulled my hand away so I could run them on my legs anxiously. "It's just that I have spent so long avoiding any feelings towards Katsuki that were anything more than friendly, and now..." Sighing again, I clenched my fists in the swim bottoms I still had on. "He's kissing me and I am thrown back there." I ground my teeth in frustration.

"You're afraid you will do something he won't like." She spoke in understanding. Her tone wasn't one of questioning. She knew how I felt about everything.

I took advantage of Katsuki when he was so young -- I scared him. Now, I could barely touch him without disgusting myself that I enjoyed his touch. I enjoyed his kiss --even if it was brought on from high emotions.

Katsuki didn't want to kiss me, I know that. He was avoiding a tough question I had asked him.

"I think he's messing around with him," I whispered, feeling the pain rip through my chest as my mother pulled me into her arms as the tears broke free once again.

***

She gave me a ride back to Katsuki's house, dropping me off pretty late in the evening. The sun had set but some lights were still on in the house. I checked my phone, wanting to see some kind of notification that would tell me that Katsuki had tried to contact me -- that he cared where I was. But there was nothing there.

"Relax, Izuku. He probably doesn't even have your number." I mumbled to myself as I walked up to the front door and knocked three times. Stepping back and waiting, I carded my hand through the clumps of curls at the back of my next. After a few moments, the door was pulled open and I stood face to face with Masaru Bakugou. His arms crossed over a robe told me that he must have been in bed.

"Don't just stand there, get inside." He grumbled and stepped aside, giving me room to slip inside as I shoved my hands into my pockets to avoid picking my fingers. We both stood there quietly as Masaru glared at me. His eyes were curious and cold -- probably wondering why I was gone. It must have been rude of me to miss dinner.

"I'm sorry for coming back so late, I went to see my mother," I explained but he justs shook his head and turned to leave.

"Katsuki isn't here, he went to stay with a friend for the night. He will probably be back sometime tomorrow." Masaru informed as he walked off towards the stairs

Going to flick off the kitchen lights, I stood still, my mind racing. Katsuki was staying with a friend and hasn't even contacted me since I left hours ago? The discomfort in my chest had me rubbing over my sternum as a dull pain began to throb in my head.

"Um... If you don't mind, do you know who he's staying with?" I asked deafly as my chest tightened with worry. Today had been too much -- first the fight, then the kiss, and then my running away. I really just wanted to talk to Katsuki -- to apologize for running off and to take my mother's advice. I wanted to explain that it wasn't the kiss that bothered me, it was that I have been afraid of the things I could do to him if I lost control again.

Now, Katsuki wasn't home and didn't come looking for me. It only deepened my conclusions that my mate did not care.

The kiss was a mistake. Masaru turned over his shoulder and looked at me quietly, his eyes flashing with a bit of sympathy before he put up his walls, hiding that sliver of emotion.

"He's staying with Denki Kaminari." He answered will the one thing I had been fearing before flicking the light off and walking back up to his room. He left me frozen as that discomfort swarmed my body.

My chest tightened as his words sank in. My mate had kissed me and then went to spend the night with the one person that I had been telling him was making me uncomfortable since I got here. The feeling of rejection slammed full force, knocking the breath out of me as my eyes stung with unshed tears.

Katsuki never told me if he had anything going on with Denki over the years or even now. Instead, he had dodged the question, distracting me with his lips as he stole my first kiss.

Now, he was off with another guy doing Goddess-knows-what. I was barely aware as my feet carried me to my bedroom. I tried to stay calm, knowing that I would feel the betrayal in our bond if he slept with someone else.

However, that wouldn't stop them from messing around. I wouldn't be able to feel the kisses, touches, or loving words they could be sharing. I would only feel if they slept with each other.

"Goddess, please..." Groaning, I flopped into the bed and kicked off my shoes, pulling off my shirt and staying in my swim shorts before pulling the duvet over my body and staring at the ceiling.

"Relax... There is no need to get all worked up." I mumbled to myself and rubbed over my chest as the pain refused to let up.

"Please, Katsuki -- Don't do this to me."

Chapter Text

𝓚𝓪𝓽𝓼𝓾𝓴𝓲 𝓑𝓪𝓴𝓾𝓰𝓸𝓾

 

"So, are you going to tell me what you're really doing here?" Denki asked me finally after I had been hiding away at his house for the last 4 hours. I had originally had come here to have a talk with Denki about the allegations Izuku made before he ran off, but I never did. I had been so conflicted over the damn kiss to really talk about anything, so the Omega just let me come inside and chill.

His parents were rarely home. Both were doctors and worked long shifts, leaving Denki alone most of the time. Denki was a loner for the longest time until he began opening up to me about his home life after that night back in high school when Denki asked me out for coffee. It took time, but he eventually told me about being alone at home -- and how he was lonely all the time.

Of course, I told him he was welcome to come over to my place any time. Our group of friends seemed to always be together anyway, so this was nothing new. But I figured telling him out loud that he was welcome over anytime made him relax some.

Denki latched onto me as I became the one person who he trusted more than anyone. He was a sweet kid growing up, but recently he had become angry that it's been months without finding his mate since he turned 18. His birthday was a good 6 months before mine, and to make things worse, he hasn't had his first heat, meaning he hasn't even laid eyes on his mate yet.

It was eating away at him, and I knew that. I was upset and emotional when I found myself driving to Denki's house after Izuku had run away after our conversation. I was worried about Izuku so I followed his scent to his mother's house, just to make sure he was somewhere safe --and then left for my friend's house.

I planned to confront Denki, but as soon as I saw him, I felt bad for being so angry at him without even knowing the truth. I have been friends with him for years, why should I believe Izuku over him without even getting Denki's side of the story? So, I calmed myself down and just told him I needed some time away from the house, and he obliged and let me inside.

Denki knew something was wrong, I could see it in the way he kept glancing at me with a worried expression. I had been quite, mulling over the events of today in my head while trying to figure out what the hell was happening. Now, Denki and I were sitting on his bed watching a movie and he seemed to be tired of my silence.

"You've been here for hours, are you even going home tonight?" Denki asked and I rolled my eyes at him.

"Why, are you going to kick me out?" I asked with a raised brow, knowing damn well he wouldn't kick me out. He chuckled and shook his head.

"No, of course. You're welcome here anytime, it's the least I can do." Denki sighed and leaned back against his pillows. "But you should tell me what's wrong. You never just show up like this without warning." I never did, he was right about that. I closed my eyes and shook my head.

Denki may be clingy and attached to me, but I knew why. I understood. He was upset about not having his mate and almost being 19 years old. I am the only Alpha around that he had attached to; he took comfort in my presence. It had always been this way since we were 16 and I confessed my intent to make them all pack members one day. I never cared about his clinginess, until now anyway. Izuku's presence in my life was only mucking up my routine and lifestyle more and more.

"I wanted to ask you something," I admitted after a few moments of silence. I needed to know what was going on between Denki and Izuku. They didn't speak to one another and then today Denki called him a slut out of nowhere. I knew that I had told my friends about Izuku and how we both had been friends when I was really young. But I never told them about the accident.

No one knew about that other than my parents, and I didn't plan on anyone else ever finding out. I didn't understand why Denki could hate him so much with only a little information about how Izuku disappeared from my life suddenly.

"Sure thing, what's up?" Denki sat up again and looked at me with a small tilt of his head as I try and formulate my question.

"What happened today?" I questioned before looking at the slight red mark on his jaw from where Izuku had punched him -- and then Kirishima had smacked him. " Does that hurt?" I pointed to the mark, making him reach up and touch it with a frown.

"No, it's fine." He replied quietly, looking down at his lap with a sigh. I knew being put in his place like that must have hurt his ego, especially coming from Kirishima as he never raised a hand to anyone.

"That's good, I'm sorry that I let things get out of hand like that." It was my responsibility to keep order between my pack members. The Alpha was supposed to protect them and dispute fights -- keep the peace. At least until the Alpha's mate showed up. Then the mate would help with those things.

"It's not your fault," Denki replied quickly and shook his head. "It's mine, I should have never called your mate a slut." He added quietly with a sigh.

"Well, that's kind of what I wanted to talk to you about." I took a deep breath and released it slowly. "Izuku claims you've been taunting him over the past few days. Is that true?" I looked him in the eye, honestly curious to hear what he had to say. I wanted to believe Izuku, and I did at the moment. But looking back, I realized that my judgment could have been clouded by the fuzzy feelings the mate pull was creating between Izuku and me.

Izuku was still new in my life, Denki had been here for years while I was getting over the lost friendship I had with Izuku. I wanted to believe Izuku, but I trusted Denki. Looking over at the Omega beside me, his head was hung as waves of shame rolled off his body. I tensed up as I realized something was wrong. He was hiding something from me.

"Denki?" I asked, looking at him with confusion. Denki's lip wobbled as he peeked up with misty eyes.

"I'm sorry... I was jealous." He whimpered and shook his head, blinking back the tears as I watched him with growing confusion. Denki and I had made it clear that we had no romantic feelings for each other. I had asked on multiple occasions when Denki started getting really attached to me. He confirmed each time that he was just close to me and there was nothing romantic there. Did he lie all those times?

"Jealous of what?" I asked, needing him to clarify right now. Denki swallowed and took a deep breath.

"Of Izuku. I know he's your mate and I know you two aren't on good terms. I thought..." He trailed off and my body tensed in confusion and pain. Denki had been taunting Izuku these few days and I didn't believe Izuku. I didn't believe my mate.

"You thought what?" I snapped, my anger bubbled up inside. Izuku and I might not be close to each other, but Izuku needed me to believe him today, and I did for a moment. But I let my own doubts get in the way. Hell, I even kissed him and then let him run off without chasing him.

"I thought that... if I made him upset with you, that he'd go away. I was scared he would take you away... You're all I have..." Denk whimpered and stared up at me with a tear-stricken face. The worry that was once hidden behind his eyes now shown clearly.

"What the hell are you talking about?" I growled with frustration and Denki whined lowly while he hung his head in submission.

"I love you like my own family! Izuku hurt you and now he's back and you're going to leave us behind! I was mad at him for upsetting you. You were my alpha before you were his!" Denki shouted loudly, his tears rolling down his cheeks as he frantically tried to explain.

___________________

The man that I had just knocked off of Izuku's half-dressed body growls at me as Izuku trembles on the floor, staring at me with wide eyes.

Before I could say anything, the man was lunging at me, sneering loudly as his hands shot out to grab me. My eyes widened as I quickly stumbled back right as Izuku jumped up from the ground and stood in front of me.

I looked up carefully and see Izuku, with his pants still hung low on his hips from where they had been yanked down just minutes prior. My stomach twisted at the thought of Izuku being hurt by this man. If I had hadn't heard him shouting, I could have been too late.

Izuku has the man's wrist clutched in his small hand as his body shakes. He panted, his scent suddenly so thick in the air that I choked and stumbled back some. Izuku's eyes flashed to me looking me over as if to see if I had been hurt, then his gaze shot back to the man.

I had never seen Izuku so angry, his jade-colored eyes were dilated and almost black, his lips curled back over his teeth as he struggled to stay up on his feet.

"Don't touch my Alpha."

________________

Gasping, I jumped back as my eyes open and Denki was perched over me, shaking my shoulders while his lips move frantically. But I can't hear anything other than the ringing behind my ears. My heart was hammering harshly, painfully, behind my rib-cage as I struggled to catch my breath.

I haven't had one of those flashbacks in a long time, and still, it hurt just as bad as the day it happened. Izuku was suffering his first heat and I just happened to be collateral damage. Yet somehow he managed to defend me as that man planned to attack me.

Izuku called me his Alpha, and for the first time, it dawned on me that that night was the first time Izuku had realized I was his mate. I was so young and he was in so much pain, yet he defended me against the man that tried to rape him. The man was going to force himself on Izuku and I had no idea that the Omega was in the home of his mate while another man touched him. I felt the anger pool in my core at the thought.

"You were my alpha before you were his!" Denki had said, yet had never been so wrong in his life. I was Izuku's alpha, his mate, long before I really got to know Denki.

"Fuck." I gasped and shook my head as Denki rubbed my back. He watched me with worried eyes that I tried to ignore. My mind was flooding -- I didn't have the energy to stop Denki's worries from overflowing. I was stuck. My heart hammered harshly in my chest as I remembered that day all over again.

I had been so pissed at Izuku for so long for something he had no control over. I was stupid for thinking he left me for his own selfish desires -- or that he touched me out of some kind of perverted lust. I had been ignorant and angry. So much so that it clouded the reality of the situation.

Iuku left for me, to protect me. I was a child when everything happened and he was being a responsible adult. He told my parents what he did to me. I could only imagine how scared the Omega was in the moment. I wasn't even home. My parents sent me to my grandparent's house while they were at home interogating my mate. My parents told me that on my 18th birthday, they told me that Izuku had left to keep me safe and that my father almost killed him because of what he did to me.

Izuku suffered through my father's attacking him and then left. He stayed away from home for four years just to protect me from himself. I'm sure my dad would have killed him for real if he showed up again before I was 18.

Literally, everything that Izuku had done, he did for me, and I showed up and tried to reject him without letting him explain himself to me. Hell, he didn't need to explain things to me, not anymore at least. I had been selfish for weeks, only hurting and confusing him more and more while he tried to win my affections.

Izuku had been respectful, keeping his distance, never touching me or even looking at me for long periods of time. I have ignored him, pushed him away, and now confused him by kissing him today. My stomach churned with discomfort and I looked up at the ceiling, blinking and breathing deeply to calm myself. I needed to go home and talk to Izuku.

"Are you okay?" Denki asks as my attention blinks back to him for a second and I feel myself getting angry again. He had been pestering Izuku just to make him upset, Izuku has been plenty upset without his help. I start to say something but I hold my tongue, realizing that I had been doing the same thing. I had been cold to Izuku for weeks, playing hot and cold, some days looking after him while others ignoring him completely.

My own confusion and selfishness had blocked me from seeing the truth of the situation we are in. I may not love Izuku, but I could no longer deny the attraction there. I couldn't keep pushing him out when everything inside me screamed at me to bring him closer and fix this mess. I didn't love him romantically -- I just didn't yet. However, I needed to fix this. I wanted this to work out.

"I need to go," I murmured and Denki reached out to hug me. I shot him a glare and he froze. "I want Izuku," I stated mainly to myself but also to Denki who pulled back with wide eyes. I looked at him and watched as a soft understanding -- mixed with sadness -- coated his expression.

"I know -- I know. You can't fight the mate pull forever. He is your other half," Denki whispered sadly, a bitterness tainting his words that I knew were born in jealousy over the fact he hasn't found his mate yet.

"I need to go," I stated, quickly getting up and pulling my shoes on and hunting for my jacket. Denki got up slowly and grabs my car keys, walking over to me and handing them out towards me once my jacket was on and my shoes are laced. "Thank you," I mumbled before pausing and looking at his remorseful eyes. I wanted to scream at him for trying to fuck this up. I wanted to hit him as Izuku had. But I couldn't. Instead, I leaned down and placed a kiss on his head. I ruffled his hair and then smirked as he gave me a tiny smile.

"Go get 'em," Denki said shyly with a nervous laugh as he pushed me out the front door making me chuckle. Nodding, I rushed out to my car and speed off towards my house. It was really late at night and there were hardly any cars on the road, making my drive simple and easy as my mind raced with thoughts of Izuku -- my mate.

He was hurting. I could feel it in my chest. It seemed that when I finally accepted the situation, it opened myself up to him in a was. Our bond had strengthened and given me access to him in a more intimate way. I could feel the ache inside his chest, making me rub a free hand over my chest. Damn, I needed to fix this. Now.

Izuku had been suffering for so long, both of us dealing with our pain in different ways. I shut people out and became cold-hearted, only caring about my small group of friends -- clinging to them when I had no one else. My flashbacks only made me hate Izuku instead of ever trying to sort out my messed up feelings towards him. I chose to be angry and let my hurt fester.

Izuku was alone for four years. He only had a few friends as well but he managed to finish college and get a job. He suffered four years of heat cycles and pain and I was sure he felt our bond weaken over the years that he spent away from me. I had no clue how he survived that. The drugs maybe? Fuck. I slammed my hands on the steering wheel and growled.

Pain erupted within as I thought of Izuku being on drugs to cope with the pain of the situation. The pain I caused him. I needed to fix this before I lost him for good. I lost him once, I couldn't do it again. Izuku was weak enough -- only now getting a little better since I was around him more. But his body was still thin and weak. I could feel his spine under my fingers when we kissed.

Speeding down the road, I turned into my neighborhood and spotted my house. It was time for the pain to end. I didn't want to be angry anymore. I didn't want Izuku to hurt anymore. It had been too damn long. Too much time where both of us had been confused and hurt over something we just needed to fucking talk about and try and fix. Izuku was my mate; he had done nothing wrong. My chest still ached and I groaned, rubbing my hand over my sternum again.

"I'm sorry, Zuku -- I'm gonna fix this, I swear," I mumbled to myself as I pulled into my driveway and jumped out of the car. Racing to the front porch I dug for my keys. "Please," I whispered to myself as my keys jingled in my unsteady hand. "Fuck, please," I begged to myself.

Chapter Text

𝓘𝔃𝓾𝓴𝓾 𝓜𝓲𝓭𝓸𝓻𝓲𝔂𝓪

Life was a cruel mother fucker, and it didn't care to break you down over and over until you were left with nothing. I was nothing.

I tried, I really did, but it was too late to make any real change to my situation. Katsuki didn't know what my life was like before. He didn't care to find out either; that was clear now. More than anything, I just wanted to be happy again. I didn't ask for this -- it just happened. I didn't ask for a mate, and honestly, I wished Katsuki wasn't my mate.

A searing pain bubbled in my chest the moment the thought crossed my mind. I sat up in bed quickly and clutched my hand over my chest, clawing at the burning sensation that was lingering longer than I would have liked. Hot tears came rolling faster than I could have prepared for -- soaking into the corners of my lips. The salty taste startled me enough to make me wipe at my face and drag the back of my hand over my lips. Why was I crying?

Looking over at the mirror that hung above the vanity, mere feet from the bed I was perched on, I could barely recognize myself. Overwhelming shame filled my features, my eyes held no light and cast shadows under my eyes that only deepen the purple bags there. When did that happen?

Touching my face, I watched the figure in the mirror copy my movements. This wasn't me, was it? I didn't even look like myself. I scoffed at that notion; I haven't looked like myself in years. The light inside me had been slowly draining over the years and it was only my fault. I did this to myself. The burning in my chest dropped to my core and I groaned into the darkness of my room.

"Why do I feel as if I lost him already?" I whispered to no one; the sound of my voice was barely recognizable as I stared blankly at my reflection across the dimly lit room.

Katsuki had been with other people. I wasn't sure exactly how he had been with other people, but it was clear that my mate did not want me, and once again, I thought I was prepared for this. I thought I would have been prepared to shatter at his feet, hoping to build myself back up in a better light. Katsuki could have forgiven me and everything would be better. If he didn't hate me anymore, I wouldn't hate myself.

I watched as the moonlight reflected off the wet trails on my cheeks, casting a silver line down my face in the mirror, and I smiled. Reaching up, I brushed my face dry, watching intensely as the warm trails reappeared, marking my pale skin with silver lines that had me smiling to myself. The small highlights from my tears caught my attention in my reflection. Pretty.

I couldn't do this anymore. No version of this would turn out the right way. What even was the right way? I didn't deserve a mate. The moon Goddess was trying to tell me that -- no wonder my life had practically fallen to shit over the years. I fucked up in the past when I had thrown myself at a child in the pains of my heat -- and of course -- the goddess would never forgive crimes against children. I was sick, and no amount of groveling for Katsuki's forgiveness would win his love.

He may forgive me, eventually. But he would never love me.

I needed to leave; Katsuki being out tonight was a blessing. I didn't think I would have the strength to walk away a second time if he was right in front of me. The sharp pain in my chest came back with a vengeance, this time stealing my breath away as I clutched at my throat and squeezed my eyes shut.

I deserved it though; the pain was the only reminder that I was still alive. I needed to leave before I ruin the one good thing Katsuki had going for him. He had his friends, a life, a home, with his parents who cared about him. He had a future; I heard he wanted to go to college. He can -- no -- he had made a life without me, and that was all I ever wanted for him. I wanted him to be okay without me, and he was okay. He had Denki.

The Alpha could be happy with Denki in ways that Katsuki would never be with me, and I couldn't compete with the one person that had been there for him over the years. The one person that he had spent with while getting over me and the disgusting things I put him through.

Reaching over to the nightstand, I felt around blindly until my fingers skimmed over the casing of my cell phone. I pulled it to my face and tapped the screen. It had me flinching while narrowing my eyes as the bright white light cast in my face. I waited for my eyes to adjust, rubbing the lingering tears away as I scrolled through my contacts until I landed on the person I needed right now.

The phone rang quietly in my ear as the pain trickled through my limbs, and I knew the pain was emotional, not physical. But damn -- it felt real. I bit down desperately on my bottom lip, placing a hand over my mouth to control the sudden sob that wanted to break free. This wasn't healthy for anyone, and me being around only caused other people's suffering. I was a burden to everyone -- even now.

"Izuku, honey are you okay? It's really late..." Mina's voice was low as she cleared her throat. I knew I woke her up. She must get tired of dealing with me so much over the years; Mina shouldn't be my keeper. A small smile pulled at my lips as I looked back over to the mirror, watching the dull look and fake smile on my lips. Who are you?

"Izuku - Are you there, honey? What's wrong?" Mina's voice grew a bit louder, clearer as the worry drips from her soothing voice. I smiled again; maybe one day she won't have to worry over me anymore. Her, Shinso, and Uraraka deserved better than a lonely and broken Omega they constantly have to worry about keeping alive.

It would be better if I just -

"Izuku!" Mina yelled and I flinched back. I made her mad again -- great. "Babe you need to talk to me, you're scaring me." I closed my eyes and pulled my free hand back up to my chest, the dull throbbing pain lingered, showing me that I was alive. This was my life, and this will be my life until I put myself out of my misery.

"I wanna go home," I whispered into the phone, my voice has gone scratchy, low, and didn't even sound like myself. Who am I? "Come pick me up - please," I placed my hand quickly, clamping it over my mouth as a low cry began to break free. Muffled behind my hand, I pulled the phone away from my face so Mina didn't have to witness my pathetic crying over Katsuki. This would be the last time. She wouldn't ever have to do this for me again.

***

Lying awake in bed, I couldn't fall asleep as the cramping in my limbs made sure to remind me that I was doing something wrong. But it wasn't wrong. Only my sick, twisted, and broken mind thought it was wrong.

I was leaving first thing in the morning. Mina and Shinso would be here to take me home. I had made plans that would make sure I could take care of myself until I was fully better and could break the bond between Katsuki and I. It wasn't worth fighting for anymore, not when I was tearing Katsuki's life apart in the process.

Mina said she would be here at 7 in the morning, early enough for me to slip out unnoticed. I let Mina and Shinos both set up my arrangements. They knew what I needed by now. Mina lived with me for four years. I wasn't in the right state of mind to deal with that. I trusted them.

I wanted to disappear. Katsuki would be fine. Another year wouldn't hurt him, and he could focus on his life and education. That was the important thing, not me. Not building a relationship with someone he would never love or trust. He would never trust me, and that hurt more than anything.

I closed my eyes, trying to get some rest, but my thoughts keep me awake. So, instead of sleeping, I packed my bags quickly and silently. I kept myself busy and my mind occupied. I knew this would hurt me, but I deserved it. I really did deserve it. So, I didn't complain. I kept my complaints on the inside where they would stay from now on. I wouldn't burden anyone with my pain ever again.

A light thump on my bedroom door had me flinching before my whole body went stiff as Katsuki's scent seeped through the cracks and into the bedroom. I held my breath, avoiding breathing in his scent that I had grown accustomed to over these last few weeks. I was leaving again; this wouldn't last.

"Izuku, are you awake?" Katsuki's hushed voice broke through the silence as my lip wobbled. I bit down on it -- hard -- as the slight copper taste filled my mouth. Everything in me begged to open the door, run to my Alpha and make the pain go away. But I couldn't. I wouldn't; not anymore. This needed to end.

"Hey -- " The light thrumming of his knuckles on the door caused me to shiver; his proximity warmed my insides although my skin felt cold and clammy. "You up? I've got to talk to you..." He asked lowly, hushed as if avoiding being caught. I thought he was with Denki; why was he here? Shaking my head, I placed my hand over my mouth to muffle the sound of my deep inhales. I forgot I was holding my breath and my lungs were screaming with a lack of oxygen.

I stayed still, not daring to move a muscle as the door handle jiggled and I heard him cursed under his breath. I closed my eyes and silently thanked myself for locking the door when I came in. Not long after, I heard him walking away. I pulled my hand away and panted, wiping away the tears that kept falling. Although, I didn't even feel like crying. I felt like screaming.

Carefully pulling myself back in bed, I pulled the covers up over my head, enjoying the warmth of my breath staying trapped under the duvet. I closed my eyes and willed myself to sleep, desperate for morning to come and for all this to just go away.

***

*Vzzt - Vzzt - Vzzt*

I quickly grabbed my phone off the nightstand and unlocked it, opening the text from Mina saying she was outside with the car and that Shinso would be standing outside to help me with my bags. I typed a quick reply and slipped my phone into my back pocket.

Opting to carry my suitcase to avoid making sounds with it rolling, I pulled it up into my arms and wobbled under its weight. I barely had four hours of sleep last night between my constant cramping and tears. But it was just enough to both soothe me and irritate me. My eyes were puffy and swollen shut when I had woken up this morning. I had to splash cold water on my face for a good 10 minutes to make the swelling go down.

Very carefully, I made my way down the stairs, wobbling with the large suitcase in my arms. No one seemed to be awake yet, and thankfully it meant I could avoid any conflict with my sudden departure. It was for the best.

I made it to the front door and slowly unlocked it, pushing it open and sighing softly when it didn't make a sound. I set the bag down on the porch and softly pulled the door shut behind me before looking out to see my friend's familiar car sitting in the road. I told them not to pull in close to the house -- just to avoid waking anyone up.

I saw Sinsho standing in the grass, a soft smile on his face as he looked me over. Yet I could see the sadness behind his eyes. I wished he wouldn't pity me, I didn't need pity. I just needed to go home. The plan, from what I could only assume since they had yet to tell me, was for Shinso to start staying with me for a while. I assumed he would scent mark me to keep the pain and emotional suffering at a low until I could find a new Alpha that would take over. I didn't want Shinso to be tied down to me anymore. He had done enough to help me over the years. They all have.

I quickly held my finger up to my lips, singling to Shinso that I needed him to be quiet. His familiar scent, like lemon and lavender, filled my nose and I breathed it in deeply, wanting to get Katsuki's scent off me as quick as possible, knowing it would only make this process worse the longer I let it linger.

Shinso made his way over to me and I shuffled my feet, forcing myself to move until I reached my friend. He wrapped his arms around me and placed his lips to my temple, a familiar gesture he has done many times before. We've gotten closer over the past year, although I lashed out at him during my heats, he never judged me or held it against me afterward. I owed him my life, although he never saw it that way. Shinso was a great friend, and never once took advantage of me because I was weak; he was a really good guy. I was lucky for that.

"Hi, Izu," Shinso hummed against my temple and pulled away, grabbing my suitcase and smiling at me softly. I wanted to be happy to see them, but it just reminded me that this is all real. I was leaving Katsuki -- for good this time.

"Hi, Shin," I whispered back, smiling a little from his warm presence. My body always relaxed around him. He was the only Alpha I ever had scent me, and his presence comforted my Omegan nature. Shinso patted my hair softly and then hauled my bags to the car where I could see Mina in the driver's seat, watching me through the window with a soft smile. I waved at her and sighed. I missed them.

I watched Shinso pop the trunk and begin packing my bags away as I thought over if I forgot anything inside. When I was sure that I had everything, I began walking to the car with my hands deep in my pockets, my hoodie zipped up around my chilled body. Everything was cold, always.

"You all set?" Shinso asked once I reached him, he held the car door open for me and I narrowed my eyes as the pull between Katsuki and I seemed to strain so hard I was afraid it would just snap.

"Yeah," I hummed but didn't move until a car pulled up and into the driveway -- music playing way too loud for this early in the morning. My eyes flickered to the driver, only for my heart to thump painfully in my chest as I recognized the yellow hair.

Denki glanced at me with a look of surprise on his face before his gaze shot away and he finished parking the car. I looked back at the car door that was being held open and I pinched my eyes shut, I needed to leave. What was he doing here? I whimpered as images of my mate and Denki spending the morning together begun plummeting my mind. My body ached and I shook my head. It doesn't matter anymore.

I needed to leave. Now. I started walking off towards Mina with my fingers curled tightly in my pockets. My nails bit into the flesh of my palms and I winced.

"Izuku?" Katsuki's voice startled me and I flinched and froze in my spot. The tears I had been holding back all morning spilled over and my knees shook. Shinso wrapped an arm around me, noticing my shaky legs, but all I could hear was the sudden low growling coming from the direction of the house. I squeezed my eyes shut, willing myself to just disappear.

Chapter Text

𝓚𝓪𝓽𝓼𝓾𝓴𝓲 𝓑𝓪𝓴𝓾𝓰𝓸𝓾

"Izuku?" I had just woken up, half-asleep from a restless night, only to receive a text from Denki, saying he was coming over to drop off my wallet that I had forgotten last night. I was in such a rush to get back home that I had missed picking up my wallet on the bedside table.

I wasn't sure what I was witnessing when I shuffled my way outside after Denki had texted me saying he was about to pull into my street. But the way my heart stopped when my eyes fell upon Izuku standing in the arms of another man had me fully awake -- and confused. The man smelled of unmated Alpha and had his arms protectively wrapped around Izuku's body. A deep rumble in my chest bubbled up as Izuku cowered into the other man's body.

He refused to turn around and look at me.

"Hey Baku, I've got your wallet -- Umm -- What's going on?" Denki shut the car door and walked out into the yard and I watched as his nose twitch. His eyes widened a bit before his head quickly turned, a tiny gasp parted his lips when he laid eyes on both the other Alpha and Izuku. My heart picked up its pace in my chest as I tried to figure out what was going on. Why was my mate in the arms of another man?

I snapped my gaze from Izuku's tense body and up to the man's face. He looked older than me and his indigo-colored eyes were dilated and wide -- fixated on Denki who stared back with equal disbelief. Oh shit, no way.

"You-You're my mate?" Denki whispered, a faint blush rising to his cheeks before his eyes flicked down to where Izuku was curled into the man's chest. Denki's lip curled and I quickly looked back to Izuku, noticing him tense up even more before turning his head and shooting a chilling glare at Denki. He tightened his grip on the man he was clinging to. I felt the irritation rising within me and I ground my teeth together.

"Will someone tell me what the fuck is going on here?" I spat out, watching as Izuku's eyes flickered to me before a pain-filled expression coated his features and his eyes filled with an agony that I didn't understand.

I saw the man tense up some as he slowly and painfully ripped his gaze away from his mate -- Denki -- only to land and glower at me. Izuku turned his back to me again and my stomach churned painfully. A deep and heavy pain settled in my chest. What the fuck was going on?

"Izu, what do you want me to do?" The man whispered, but I could hear him loud and clear. My whole body shook with anger as I watched my mate ignore me and cling to another Alpha. I clenched my fists and made my way towards them, needing to know what the hell was happening and who this man was. I heard a car door slam shut and my eyes flicked towards the sound.

The woman Izuku called Mina was marching towards us with an angry and tense expression. I could clearly smell the Alpha pheromones rolling off her as she locked eyes with me. A silent challenge that had my teeth bared and my canines extending from my gums.

"Shin," Izuku whimpered and balled his fists up into the Alpha's shirt. My heart throbbed and twisted at the sight and I froze my approach, only a few feet away from my mate and the man Izuku called 'Shin'.

"Izuku, what's going on?" I asked him, but he didn't reply. His whole body trembled slightly, and I started to move forward again, needing to comfort my mate and wanting to rip him out of the arms of the older Alpha. "Who the fuck are you and why do you have your hands on my mate?" I seethed and locked eyes with the Alpha right as Mina stepped up beside them.

Izuku shook his head and the man rubbed his back. His eyes flicked over to Denki who sat with a pain-filled expression as he watches his mate comfort mine. What was going on here? Denki started approaching and Mina shot him a glare, her pheromones reeked of pissed off Alpha as she halts Denki's approach with her angry gaze.

"You just stay over there, little boy," Mina growled and I watched the man stiffen up. His lips pulled back over his teeth as Mina openly snapped at his mate.

"Mina," The man warned, shooting her a glare that Mina returned. My eyes never left Izuku's trembling form.

"What, Shinso? This is the little bitch that has been fucking around with Izuku's mate and rubbing it in his face!" Mina growled and glared at Denki who now had gone pale. His eyes widened with distress as he stared at Shinso who's eyes now flicked over to his mate. His face went soft before he threw up a wall, shutting off all emotions and going cold toward Denki.

"T- That's not true!" Denki shouted as panic laced his voice and he watched his mate, that he has just found, ignore him. Pealing his eyes away he focused back on Izuku.

"Bullshit!" Mina snarled and then shot her glare to me. "Don't get me started on you. Big man, huh? Fucking around with another Omega while your mate withers away. Well, you know what?" Mina smirked and looked me up and down, setting my body aflame with anger at her disrespectful attitude. Another Alpha was challenging me, but my mate was too close for comfort. I couldn't attack and risk hurting him.

"What?" I spat and glanced at Izuku who looked to be whispering to Shinso. Mina laughed dryly, bringing my attention back to her.

"You don't deserve him. Izuku is too good for you, and while you were off fucking around someone else's mate, Izuku was crying to me, begging for us to come to pick him up and take him home." Izuku wanted to leave? I thought he was staying for a month to figure things out with us. We had only spent about two weeks together.

"I wasn't fucking around with Denki last night!" I growled and looked over at Izuku who still wouldn't look at me or turn around. "Izuku, I swear I wasn't sleeping with him; you would have felt if I was." I tried to explain to him, only to have Shinso growl and glare at me.

"I've seen what Izuku has been through over the years while you lived your perfect little life with your family and friends. Izuku was torn away from his only family, forced to move away for four years dealing with his own issues from what happened to him. He still won't open up about everything, but whatever happened broke him, you fucking bitch." Shinso seethed, his arms tightening around Izuku and holding him close. His words stunned me as I remind myself that Izuku had been suffering for a long time because of the situation we had been put in as kids.

"We were there for all his heats where he cried for hours as his body broke itself for being away from his mate for so long. He did it for you, asshole!" Shinso spat harshly and I growled lowly, picking up on the scent of my mate's distress as he shook in Shinso's arms.

"Ha! And don't get me started on you." Shinso shot a glare at Denki who instantly whimpered, his eyes filled with tears as the Alpha ripped into him. I noticed how his voice lowers and softens some as he looked at his mate.

"I can't blame you for previous partners you may have had, but the fact that my mate is a pathetic whore who deliberately tries to tear two mates apart for his own selfish needs, that's too much for me." Shinso glared at Denki before looking down at where Izuku was buried into Shinso's chest. I growled when he hooked his finger under Izuku's chin, forcing him to look up at the taller male and my stomach churned. My heart slammed with panic from the situation I have brought upon myself.

Shinso leaned down and kissed Izuku's cheek before lowering his head and nuzzling into Izuku's neck, scenting him intimately as Izuku began nuzzling back -- ripping bits of my heart out as I watched him so openly get scented by another Alpha. Izuku whimpered and began to go limp in Shinso's arms. I could hear the broken sobs behind me as Denki witnessed the whole thing as well.

"I - I'm sorry!" Denki wailed as he started to walk towards his mate, and I knew this was painful for him. I knew how badly he wanted to find his mate. I reached out and grabbed him, holding him back as I knew that getting too close right now would put him in danger as well as Izuku. There was nothing more I wanted than to rip Shinso's head off his shoulders for touching my mate, but I couldn't move.

Shinso rumbled and pressed his lips to Izuku's neck once before pulling back and scooped his limp body up into his arms. Smirking at me with hate-filled eyes before walking off to the car parked in the street by my driveway. I felt the pull on our bond struggle, taking my breath away as I clutched at my chest, my knees going weak as I realized the severity of the situation. Izuku was leaving.

"Izuku?!" I gasped and struggled to stay on my feet. Mina followed them and I began walking forward, needing to see his face one more time. My body screamed at me as my limbs went weak from the strain on our bond, and for once, I felt the pain of our mate bond breaking. Was this what Izuku had been going through?

"Wait, Izuku. Please," I begged and caught up to them, stepping in front of the Alpha that had my mate in his arms. Izuku's eyes were wide but his whole body was relaxed from the scenting he received. My gaze locked to his emerald-colored eyes and Shinso growled.

"Step back. Izuku wants to leave. Don't try and stop us now." Mina went to open the car door for Shinso to put Izuku inside when a strong scent filled the air, freezing my actions as my eyes flickered over to the Omega in Shinso's arms. Mina gasped and rushed to his side before letting a string of harsh profanities fly.

My body tensed up as Izuku's eyes darken and his thin frame began to shake. His eyes never once left my face as his lips parted slightly, soft spurts of air puffed from his mouth as Izuku's scent clouded my mind. Mina stepped in front, hiding Izuku from me my canines throbbed. I balled my fists up.

"Shinso, take Izuku to the car." Mina gritted out and Shinso nodded, looking completely unaffected by the scent of Izuku's sudden heat. However, my body burned as his heavy scent rolled around us all, filling my head with nothing other than my mate, and no matter how many times I told myself this would never happen, my body pulled me closer, needing to get my mate somewhere safe and away from prying eyes. His heat was a private time, they shouldn't be here.

"Take your hands off my mate before I rip them off your body." My voice was low, threatening, as I blocked the Alpha's path. I refused to let them take my mate away from me during his heat. Mina snarled, going to stop me right as Izuku started thrashing in Shinso's arms.

"Mmgh - Ha - Let me g-go!" Izuku suddenly whined, his arms stretching out towards me while his eyes stayed locked on my location as if I would disappear any second.

"Don't even think about it," Mina warned, a low growl leaving her and Shinso took a step back, taking my mate further away from me. My chest rumbled as I watched my mate desperately try to reach out to me, even Denki had stepped forward again. His Omegan instincts more than likely telling him to worry after the other Omega in heat surrounded by three angry Alphas.

"Hand him over," I demand and watched as Shinso's eyes flickered to Denki for a moment before going back to Izuku. "If you think I am letting my mate leave while he is in heat, you have another thing coming, idiot. He's mine." I seethed, my mouth watering as Izuku sweet Strawberry scent swarmed us all and I began to worry about attracting other unmated Alphas that may be around.

"Not going to happen." Mina spat and Izuku growled weakly, his hands clawing at Shinso's arms, wanting to be released.

"Let me go, Shin... I want to stay, I want to stay, please," Izuku whined and dug his fingernails into Shinso's arms. The Alpha hissed in pain at the sting as blood droplets began to form in the shape of crescent moons from Izuku's nails puncturing his skin.

"Y-You should let him go... He needs to be with his mate..." Denki spoke up timidly and Shinso shot him a glare.

"You need to shut up, you don't know what he needs." Shinso snapped and Izuku wiggled until he slipt out of Shinso's arms and ran straight to me -- crashing into my arms and burying his face into my neck. Mina cursed and Shinso let a low rumble out, his Alpha pheromones were strong, strong enough to throw Denki off balance as his knees wobbled and he fell to the ground onto his knees, gasping as his mate projected his dominant scent.

"Get off my property before I call the authorities. My mate clearly wants to stay with me, and as his mate, I have the right to make the decisions for him during his heat when he is most vulnerable. I don't know you two, my mate stays here. Now leave." I snapped and watched as Mina and Shinso both shot worried glances at Izuku who was crooning into my neck -- his knees wobbled as I held him up with my arms around his waist.

"I - I - Mmgh, I'm fine you guys." Izuku tried to tell his friends but they didn't move an inch until I growled at them.

"He said he's fine." I spat and tugged Izuku closer to my body, the scent of his heat clung to the fabric of my clothes, seeping into my pores as he rubbed his leaking scent glands against my neck. His whole body has risen in temperature and from what little I did know about Omega heat cycles, this was only the beginning and wouldn't go away until the five-day cycle was waited out -- or he is mated and knotted a few good times.

Mina looked at Izuku with a worried expression before she gently took hold of Shinso's arm and pulled him back. Shinso growled, eyes dark with anger, and jerked his arm out of her grasp. Mina snapped and grabbed him again, jerking him back and seething through her teeth.

"We will be back in five days to pick him up. Plan on it, little Alpha." Mina scowled and pulled Shinso back some. "Use a fucking condom, asshole." She sneered and Shinso bared his teeth.

"If you hurt him, I will kill you." He threatened me and Izuku whined into my neck, tearing my attention off the two pissed off Alphas in front of me. I rolled my eyes at them and jerked my arm behind Izuku's knees, pulling him up into my arms and tucking him into my chest.

"It's none of your fuckin' business what I do to my mate," I smirked at them. "Now fuck off before I have you all arrested for trespassing." I narrowed my eyes at them until Shinso scoffed and jerked his arm out of Mina's grasp and stormed off to the car, Mina on his tail. I didn't wait for the car to even pull away before I turned around and started carrying my whimpering mate back into the house.

"Go home, Denki." I ground through my teeth, not sparing him another glance as I lightly kicked open the front door and slammed it shut behind me.

Chapter Text

𝓘𝔃𝓾𝓴𝓾 𝓜𝓲𝓭𝓸𝓻𝓲𝔂𝓪

Everyone was fighting and I just wanted them to stop. Why did Katsuki have to come outside, everything was going fine without him ruing my plans. I wanted to slip out unnoticed; I doubted anyone would have even cared that I left without a goodbye. That was all ruined when he showed up and made a scene. Why did he even care that I want to leave?

Things got worse when they all started arguing, and I couldn't bring myself to speak up or even look at Katsuki.

I wanted to disappear. It hurt too much just standing there while my friends and my mate argued over me like a helpless child. There were too many pissy Alphas around -- each one releasing strong pheromones to warn the other off as if I wanted to go back with Katsuki or something. I didn't want to stay here, there was no need to swarm me with alpha pheromones as if I might bolt away.

Then Katsuki had to follow after me when Shinso began taking me to the car, and I knew it wouldn't end well. I would have been panicking if Shinso hadn't of scented me earlier, my omegan nature was screaming at me to just submit and hope that the three Alpha's anger would blow over with time.

My body was under stress, more than I needed at the time considering how weak I was already, and when Katsuki followed after me and got too close, his scent washed over me like the warmest blanket and I was lost. Something bubbled up inside of me and threatened to break. All I could do was stare at him. His panicked eyes held me in and the raw emotions on his face along with his sweet and smoky scent -- I snapped.

My pheromones released suddenly, and I knew what was happening. My body was being forced into an early heat because of the stress and pheromones being released around me.

I had recently come off the heat suppressants because I was going to be with Katsuki. I was hoping that he would understand if I went into heat and would at least take care of me -- I wasn't expecting sex from my mate -- but I craved his attention and care. I didn't expect him to mate with me; I didn't want him to mate with me. In the past, every time the lust-filled imaged would flash into my mind, I would feel sick to my stomach.

Only this time I didn't want to run away from them. Katsuki was here with me. He was begging me to stay. He wanted me. And although it may only be the heat talking, I liked having him fight over me. Katsuki stood his ground and I begged and fought my way out of Shinso's grip, running straight into Katsuki's arms that were open and ready for me. Katsuki wanted me.

"Get off my property before I call the authorities. My mate clearly wants to stay with me, and as his mate, I have the right to make the decisions for him during his heat when he is most vulnerable. I don't know you two, my mate stays here. Now leave." Katsuki's voice was deep, his tone ringing with authority as he clutched me protectively in his arms. He might have been with Denki last night, but my mate wanted me now. He chose me now. They need to understand that.

"I - I - Mmgh, I'm fine you guys." I pant, my fingers gripped into the warm flesh of Katsuki's biceps. His arms locked around my waist. I wasn't sure how much longer I had before my heat hit fully, it's been so long since I wasn't on suppressants, and for once I didn't want Mina and Shinso here. I wanted to be away from prying eyes. I wanted my mate.

I could hear the low growl coming from Shinso and I frowned, I didn't want them mad at me. I just wanted to be happy, and my mate wanted me now. Why wouldn't they let me be happy?

"He said he's fine." Katsuki snapped and I felt my body buzz with energy. I had never been held like this during my heats before, and it felt so nice to be pressed against my mate. My nerve endings were going wild with the contact. I could feel my scent glands swelling and I did the one thing I always wanted to but never could before.

I pushed myself up on my tiptoes and rubbed my neck with Katsuki's -- mixing our scents and officially scent marking him for the first time. It wouldn't last forever but it was enough to make me purr, my whole body rumbling happily with my claim on him. Mine.

"We will be back in five days to pick him up, plan on it, little Alpha." Mina sneered and I rumbled at her attitude. Just leave already, I wanted my mate. He finally wants me. What don't they understand? I'm fine now, my Alpha wanted me. "Use a fucking condom, asshole." She spats harshly and I groaned into Katsuki's chest. Yes, knot me. Finally, Alpha. Finally. My body trembled with the promise of finally becoming one with my Alpha -- and for once, the thought of mating with him didn't repulse me. What was different now? Why did it suddenly change?

"If you hurt him, I will kill you." Shinso threatened my mate and I bared my canines into Katsuki's chest, rumbling with the threat against my Alpha. My Alpha was strong -- he would kill anyone before they could hurt him. My Alpha protected me. He wanted me. Finally.

"It's none of your fuckin' business what I do to my mate. Now fuck off before I have you arrested for trespassing." Katsuki ordered and I smiled into his warmth. My mate was so strong. My knees began to shake under my body, and I felt the heat pooling in my stomach -- my mouth watering with the anticipation. I released my scent more for my Alpha, silently begging him to take me somewhere and breed me.

Katsuki scooped me up into his arms, bridal style, and started walking. But I didn't care where we were going. My mate would take care of me. I nuzzled into his body, shielding myself from the outside world, wishing to disappear. Only this time, I wished to disappear inside Katsuki's arms and never return.

"Go home, Denki." My mate ordered the other Omega and I smirked, happy that my Alpha was getting rid of the pest. I shut my eyes and squirmed as my body began to burn, the only places that weren't on fire were the points of contact that my body had with Katsuki. The front door slammed shut but I barely paid attention, the only thing I wanted was more contact.

My hands found the collar of Katsuki's hoodie and searched for the zipper. This needed to come off. It was hiding my mate from me, and it had been so long. I needed to touch him. I needed his skin to soothe the burning all over my limbs. This was better than any nest I could have built or any number of hoodies with stale scents. This was the real thing. Katsuki wanted me.

"Easy," Katsuki hushed and stops my hands from tugging at the zipper of his jacket, but I didn't want to stop. I frowned and tugged again; it was only getting in the way, trapping his scent and making it harder to touch him.

"T - Take them off," I whined and finally clasped onto the zipper, tugging it halfway down his chest only to be stopped by my own body that's pressed to his stomach where I was being held. I groaned and tugged harder until I gave up and shoved my hands onto the exposed panes of his chest.

"Izuku," Katsuki sighed and stumbled a little, sucking in a sharp breath as my fingers trailed over his chest and I pressed my face to his bare skin, inhaling and chirping happily. "S-Shit," He chuckled a bit, but I didn't think anything was funny.

"I can't walk if you keep doing that," Katsuki hummed and shook his head. I looked up from below his chin, his jaw was tense and his eyes dark.

"What's going on out here?" Mitsuki's voice rang from the hallway and I tensed up. Just leave us alone; I want to be alone with my mate. Katsuki stopped walking for a second before continuing again.

"Izuku's in heat," Was all he replied with, a shocked gasp coming from his mother's lips before the sound of a door closing had me jumping again. When I opened my eyes, I was in an unfamiliar room that smelled heavily of my mate. I purred and wiggled in his arms, my cock swelling as I am assaulted by Katsuki's scent from every direction. A low moan parted my lips as I exhale.

Katsuki lowered me to the bed and I instantly went limp, barring my neck and panting heavily. My gaze locked with his and I whined as his eyes practically dripped with lust and he inhales while looking me over slowly.

"Goddess -- Izuku you smell so good right now," he groaned, and I reached my hands back out, grabbing at his jacket and trying to pry it off his body. I smiled when I managed to pull it up a tiny bit, only for Katsuki to pull my hands away again.

"No," he sighed and shook his head. A low cry left my lips as my heart squeezed in my chest. The heat came back full force at my mate's rejection. Why didn't he wanted me anymore? He wanted me mere minutes ago, why not now?

"W- Why?" I whimpered as tears filled my eyes and I blinked rapidly, trying to clear the blurriness away.

"Don't cry," Katsuki cooed softly, kneeling beside the bed and brushing his fingers under my eyes, wiping the tears away as I shivered from the pleasure the light trails of his fingers brought my skin. I reached out for him, wanting to touch him. I didn't understand.

"I - It hurts," I whimpered and shook as I felt a gush of slick leaving my body, wetting my jeans. My body was preparing itself for my mate's knot. Katsuki's eyes widened as his nostrils flared, inhaling deeply his eyes get impossibly dark as he picked up on the scent of my slick. I smiled and tugged at the button on my jeans. My Alpha liked my scent.

"Fuck," Katsuki growled and I rumbled happily as I popped the button open and started tugging my jeans down. Katsuki's eyes greedily took me in, watching me with shaking fists as I struggled to peel my skinny jeans off.

The heat was burning me up -- my clothes were only itching me and trapping the heat within. "Izuku, it really pains me to do this, but you've got to stop. Let me take care of you. I don't want to have sex with you." He groaned out, his hands running down his face in frustration.

My breath hitched in my throat and a pain-filled cry bursts free, the tears spilled over once again. My mate didn't want me. I was a pathetic Omega! What kind of Omega was so bad that their Alpha rejected them during their heat? I sobbed as my hands covered my face; my jeans remained half tugged down to my knees as I choked on my cries.

"Woah, Woah, Woah," Katsuki grabbed my hands and peeled them away from my face -- his body half hovering over top me. I could see him trembling as he fought to remain in control, but I wondered why. I was offering myself to him. He should take me -- knot me -- breed me.

"W- Why? I'm not a g-good Omega?" I whimpered as my legs shook and twitched, more heat boiled in my core as my body pushed out even more slick and I sucked in a sharp breath. Katsuki growled as his eyes flickered down to my lower half, my erection strained against my boxers as my hips absentmindedly rut, seeking any friction I could get.

"Gods -- no you're perfect." His voice sounded strained and I moaned, bucking my hips and grabbing his arm. His eyes snapped back up to my flushed face and I frowned. Why wasn't he touching me? Does he not know how?

"Y-You can... mmgh... touch me," I panted and nodded my head at him as an amused smirk began to twitch at his lips. I smiled back at him, not sure why he was happy but I liked when he was happy. He only started to chuckle at me, and I frowned again, curling my lip and whining.

"K- Katsuki... Please, it h - hurts," I groaned and his smile faded away into a look of concern and tension. I could feel my body trembling with the need to be mated, my entrance was twitching as slick trickled out and wet my thighs. I was presenting perfectly for him -- why didn't he want me?

"I'm sorry, Izuku." Katsuki sighed and pulled off his shirt. I bit my lip as a shiver ran up my spine.

"Thank you, Alpha." I keened happily only to cock my head to the side when Katsuki shook his head at me.

"I'm not having sex with you, Izuku. It's not because of you, okay? You're - You're such a good Omega..." He visibly struggled to try and praise me, and I whimpered, unsure about his behavior. He didn't look like I was a good Omega. My stomach churned and the tears slip down my face again. Katsuki frowned.

"Fuck, please don't cry..." He begged softly and stroked my hair. I wanted to nuzzle into his touch and bask in the warmth it brought me, but I knew he wasn't happy with me, so I bat his hand away.

"N-No, I'm not a good Omega. You - You don't want to knot me, Alpha?" I whimpered and Katsuki's face pales, his eyes going wide as his lips part. My instincts were conflicted. My Alpha was going against all basic nature here. He wasn't doing his job! Katsuki moaned lowly and narrowed his eyes. His hand came back to my hair and slowly gripped -- tightly -- into the curls as he leaned over me.

"I do. Goddess, I do." He groaned and I arched slightly, the pull on my scalp making my jaw drop as my hips rut. Low whines seeped from my lips as Katsuki stared at me with dilated eyes.

"You are a good Omega, and I do want to knot you." He admitted and I panted, my hands grabbing at his exposed sides, trying to find purchase somewhere to pull him closer.

"Just not tonight, Omega." He breathed out and I whined. My body thrashed with frustration.

Katsuki pulled sharply in my hair and I gasped, my eyes widening, and I stopped wiggling at his sign of dominance. The Omegan side of me instantly submitting and baring my neck. Katsuki groaned and moved down, running his nose along my throat and humming as I pant harshly, sweat on my forehead dampening my hair as it stuck to my face in random places.

"Just relax, let me hold you. It will calm your heat; you need to sleep." My mate mumbled against my throat and I moaned. I didn't want to sleep; I wanted his knot. I needed it -- didn't he understand that? What kind of Alpha didn't understand that was what Omegas needed when in heat?

"P - Please, don't leave m - me like this," I panted, looking down at my throbbing member as my boxers stick to me in the most uncomfortable way. My eyes plead with him to do something, anything to help make the pain go away. I've waited so long without him, and he couldn't even give me this small thing?

Katsuki watched me, his brows furrowed as he's hit with another strong wave of my pheromones. My fingers dug into his arm with one hand, the other clutched into the covers as I trembled while trying to hold myself back from shoving my own hand down my pants right now.

I must have really been a failure; my own Alpha wouldn't even touch me. This was worse than spending my heats alone.

I'd rather that then sit here with an Alpha that refused to touch ---

"Hngh!" My eyes slammed shut as Katsuki's large hand suddenly slipped past the elastic band of my boxers and wrapped around my erection. Katsuki's breath fanned my cheek as I cracked one eye open and glanced at him. His eyes were narrowed and dark as his hand tugged slowly from root to tip, pulling the sensitive skin along my shaft while my jaw fell open in shock.

I rolled my hips, pushing up into his fist as my body trembled and buzzed from the contact my body so desperately craved. Katsuki groaned as his fingers curled around my shaft and he ran his thumb over the slit, causing me to cry out and arch my back.

"Ngha - Fuck," I whimpered and rut my hips forward, pushing myself through his fist as he suddenly presses his lips to my neck, brushing his lips along where my scent glands and trailing his wet tongue over the swollen area.

"Y- Yes. Oh -- Oh my goddess!" Katsuki gripped my member, stroking me as tears pricked my eyes. The pleasure I had been denying myself over the years finally caught up with me as a familiar coil began to build in my core.

"Fuck, Izu..." Katsuki murmured against my skin. His voice was deeper than normal and I shivered.

"Y - You're such a good Omega." Katsuki groaned into my neck as he brings my body so much pleasure, it was blinding. I had restricted myself for years the pleasure of letting my body experience the burning lust and cravings that I now was openly soaking in.

"Y - Yes, I'm a g- good Omega. Your Omega. Only y-yours!" I whined and nodded my head dumbly while slamming my eyes shut as his thumb spread the moisture dripping from the slit of my member. All my nerve endings were ablaze, tingling as my legs twitched. "Kat!" I squealed and arched my back, teetering on the edge of release as Katsuki sucked lightly on my neck.

"P - Please?!" I shook desperately as my Alpha squeezed the base of my shaft, holding back my release as the tears rolled down my flushed cheeks. My eyes cracked open, searching for my Alpha as he pulled away from my neck to look down at me. I found a smirk on his lips that softened when his eyes landed on my tear-stricken cheeks.

He watched me and I whined lowly, right on the edge, but not caring one bit as Katsuki's soft gaze held my attention. His free hand came up to cup my cheek, stroking my bottom lip that was wet with drool.

My eyes fluttered, half-lidded and droopy as Katsuki hummed in the back of his throat. I moaned softly and gasped as he pressed his lips to mine, capturing them in a sweet kiss as his hand pumped me one last time -- sending me over the edge as my orgasm came crashing over me.

My hips jerked and I cried out into his mouth as shockwaves of pure rapture took over my body -- sucking the life out of me yet rejuvenating me at the same time. Katsuki stroked me through my release, kissing me hungrily and sucking my bottom lip between his teeth.

My eyes fluttered shut as his hand slipped away, his teeth released my lip as he pressed soft kisses over my bruised lips. His hand that held my face stroked tenderly over my jaw as my heat symptoms died down and my ragged breathing regulated.

"Get some rest, I'll be here when you wake up." Katsuki hummed while placing another tender kiss on my lips before pulling away. The bed dipped as he left, but I could barely move or open my eyes to see where he was going. A few moments late, the bed dipped again and my jeans were begin tugged away from my ankles fully along with my boxers. I could feel Katsuki cleaning me off, wiping my thighs and stomach with a warm cloth before pulling the covers around my spent form -- tucking me in and pulling me against his broad chest.

"You are a good Omega, Izuku." He whispered and I began to purr, soaking up my mate's affection as sleep took over and I pressed myself closer to Katsuki's warmth -- willing myself to disappear.

Wanting to disappear in his arms and never return.

Chapter Text

𝓘𝔃𝓾𝓴𝓾 𝓜𝓲𝓭𝓸𝓻𝓲𝔂𝓪

 

I couldn't get enough; my mate was showing me attention and after four years of being in constant pain, Katsuki was making every bad thing go away. Even if this was temporary, I was determined to let nature take its course this time around. For once.

I was off the heat suppressants for pretty much the first time since I began having heats and Katsuki was taking care of me while I was unable to do it myself. His Alpha instincts were kicking in; I loved it.

When I had woken from my nap, my heat was back, and as much as I loved the attention my Alpha was giving me, I hated the fact that somewhere deep within my chest would burn every time he rejected my pleas for his knot. Every time he would ignore my cries and then steer my attention away with his hands. He took his time - much to my surprise - and explored my body. Fingers teasing my hips, thighs, neck, and stomach, Katsuki never left me in pain and made sure I was sated, fed, hydrated, and clean.

It was something I never thought I would have as an omega. I didn't think of things like heat cycles and mates until I found my mate. So I never cared to wonder how my Alpha would treat me. When I found Katsuki, I knew that things would never be as simple as I wanted them to be.

I had woken my mate up once or twice throughout the night, my body cycling through rough waves of desire while Katsuki slept soundly in the same bed. I wish we could have slept next to each other before now. It made this almost seem mundane now.

There had been no special moments between us that would lead up to this. No late night dates or around-the-block drives, only to come back where I would sneak into his bed, or he would ask me to spend the night with him. There were no dates in general, I hadn't gotten around to asking him that. We didn't get casual kisses and courting.

No - I was thrown into a bed with my Alpha because of my heat. Not because he loved me or even liked me in this way.

There was nothing else. No feelings attaching us other than my one-sided devotion to him that was slowly crumbling.

I was going to leave and make things right for once. I was tired of hurting. I didn't want Katsuki to look at me with disdain and confusion anymore. It was clear from the start that he didn't want me, and nothing I could do would ever bring him to me. I knew what was happening, and though my heat made it difficult, I tried to remember that this was only the heat that was making Katsuki treat me kindly. He had laid his claim on me in front of my friends and Denki. He told them that I was his mate. His mate. It had made me happy, ecstatic even, but it was just the heat.

Katsuki was down in the kitchen making us breakfast. It had been a full 24 hours since I had gone into heat. I had only been able to munch on a few crackers while drinking some juice and water before I would feel sick to my stomach. I was used to feeling sick during my heats, only this time it wasn't because I hated being in heat. I used to make myself sick with negative thoughts and pain. Now, my body was fighting to be on a normal cycle, and everything inside of me was cramping, churning, and shifting around in preparation for pregnancy.

Only I wasn't pregnant, nor could I get pregnant. I had ruined my reproductive system over the years. Those heat suppressants had pumped me so full of chemicals that my body would never be able to carry a child.

It didn't matter though. I was leaving once this was all over. I was just so tired.

This morning, Katsuki had woken up with me squirming in bed; my hands twisted into the blankets as the ash-blond's arms locked me against his chest. I couldn't even dwell on the fact that my Alpha was cuddling me in his sleep because my thighs were quivering and slick was dirtying the sheets- again.

However, Katsuki never got mad when he had to change them out or clean me up. I was embarrassed as all hell though.

When he had woken up with me rutting back into his groin, he had almost snapped. I saw the look of pure lust dripping from his eyes while he flipped me onto my back and hovered over me. But as quickly as he had me pinned and I thought he would finally give me what my body needed -- he was gone.

He pulled off of me and shook his head; I swore my heart would shatter at the rejection. He never got too close. He did the bare minimum, never touching me outside of a heat cycle or to help me clean up. I couldn't blame him; my Alpha didn't care for me intimately. This was something he was forced into. I couldn't force him.

When Katsuki came back into the bedroom, I was up and walking around. I had begun to get overwhelmed with the desire to start nesting. Something I had experienced before but never let myself enjoy. The last time I had started a nest, it was torn apart before my eyes.

It was probably one of the most emotional heats I ever had to endure.

I was walking around in nothing but one of Katsuki's shirts. It hung mid-thigh length and was just enough for me to not feel extremely bare when I wasn't in an active heat cycle, but comfortable enough to not irritate my sensitive skin. Plus, it smelt like Katsuki.

The ash-blond male looked at me with question's burning behind his eyes. I hadn't been out of bed since Katsuki brought me here over 24 hours ago. He carried a plate of food over to the bedside table and set it down along with a glass of juice, giving me a slight smile as a greeting. He must be embarrassed about what he had been doing with me all night. Or disgusted.

"Come eat, you must be hungry." He gestured to the plate of food but my mind was fixated on something else. I shook my head at his offer and, although I was hungry, I wanted to nest. I wanted to finally build my nest, and dammit, I was going to have it.

No one was here to stop me. My body craved it, and I was done not giving my body what it needed.

"Do you have pillows and -- and extra blankets?" I hesitantly asked. I was afraid he would catch on to what I was doing and refuse me. Katsuki didn't really want me, so building a nest would be futile. Nests were meant for breeding, and my Alpha refused me that. He told me that the first time that he wanted to, but he still refused. I normally don't associate my self worth with whether or not an Alpha wants to fuck me, but during my heat, it was pure and instinctual.

He didn't want me, and that hurt on a biological level.

"Pillows and blankets? Are you uncomfortable on the bed or something?" He asked and he seemed genuinely worried. It almost made me smile. Almost.

However, I only shook my head and walked to the area of the room that smelt even more like my mate. His closet was open slightly, a hamper half-filled with worn clothes sitting inside. I purred while walking over and opened the doors, my nose flaring as his scent became stronger.

"Yes -- I need something soft... Umm, with your scent on it." I mumbled while pulling a worn shirt from the hamper and holding it to my face. The rumbling in my chest growing louder as I greedily inhale my mate's scent.

"Soft with... my scent?" Katsuki questioned while coming to stand behind me. I wanted to lean back into him and enjoy his warmth, but I needed to be doing something. What did I need to be doing? I looked around the room until I found the perfect spot. A corner area with no window, private, and protected on the most sides so that I wouldn't be worried about other people coming by while being mated.

I grabbed hold of the sheets and tore the blankets off the bed while Katsuki narrowed his eyes in confusion as I tug the linens to the corner I had selected. The Alpha watched me curiously as I began piling up a bed of pillows and sheets from the bed onto the floor before going back to the closet and grabbing some of his used clothes.

Realization dawned on Katsuki's face as I began spreading out the fabrics and making a comfortable nest that was only big enough for us two. I looked over at the blond as he stood by the now baren bed with slightly widened eyes and parted lips.

"Oh--" He breathed out before his eyes flicked over to my nest. I wanted him to help me. He was my Alpha, the only one allowed to touch my nest without it causing me distress. I wanted this badly.

"You're nesting... aren't you?" He asked and I wanted to roll my eyes. I sometimes forget my Alpha was younger than me and probably had little life experience and knowledge on Omegas. I knew school taught us some things but did school ever prepare people enough for the real world? I didn't think so.

I nodded my head as I went back to fixing the sheets and fluffing the pillows out. It was missing something. I turned around only to notice that Katsuki was missing. I frowned, not liking his sudden departure when I clearly wanted his help with my nest.

My Alpha was stupid sometimes. I scoffed and threw some more of his clean shirts into the pile, spreading them out when Katsuki entered the room again carrying an armful of blankets.

"Are those my clean shirts?" He drew out while giving me a quizzical stare. However, my eyes were on the soft-looking blankets inside my mate's arms.

I moved aside, pointing to my nest and whimpered. This was perfect. My Alpha looked at me and his gaze softened, he looked almost sad when he smiled that gently at me.

"Okay, where do you want them?" Katsuki asked, crouching down beside me and dropping the blankets on the floor. I felt myself growing warmer with his kindness and I leaned my body into his side. The blond Alpha wrapped his arm around my waist to hold me upright while I went limp against his side. This all was exhausting.

My eyes trailed back over to the food sitting on the nightstand and Katsuki noticed.

"How about you go eat while I finish your nest?" He said softly while he shifted his weight onto his other foot, turning his squatted body in my direction. My stomach growled and I bit down on my lip causing my Alpha to chuckle.

"I'll take that as a yes." He whispered and helped me to my feet. Once he had me placed sitting up and back against the headboard, he placed the plate of eggs, toast, and fruit onto my lap.

Maybe my Alpha wasn't so stupid after all.

He managed to make foods for me that would be easy on my stomach. I smiled gratefully at him and began nibbling on the toast while Katsuki went to work on my nest. An overwhelming calmness filled my body as I watched him hunker down and begin fluffing up the pillows, pushing the blankets around until they make a nice area, and tucking his shirts inside the pillowcase as well as around the edge of the nest.

I watched as his Alpha instincts took over, pride bubbling up within my chest as he took great care in making me the perfect nest. I nibbled on the toast and took a few bites of the eggs and fruit before downing half the glass of apple juice. I was no longer hungry and I wanted to get back into my nest with my Alpha. It was almost complete, and although my Alpha refused to breed me, it was better than nothing just to have him lying with me inside my nest.

"Does it look alright?" Katsuki asked quietly, his eyes holding a certain uncertainty that made me smile. Was he nervous? I nodded quickly and watched as a smile ticked at his lips. He gestured to the area, wanting me to test it out and I swore my body lit on fire as my Alpha silently told me to get into our nest.

My body quivered with anticipation for something that would never come. I had to just deal with it. Did I even want to give myself fully to a man that would never love me?

If it was Katsuki - if it was my mate - I think that I might.

I frowned but crawled into the comfortable area that smelt heavily of Katsuki. His scent surrounded me and a low whine breathed past my lips. I curled up into the pillows, pressing my face into it to inhale him more. I wouldn't get this again. I needed to make it last. I snapped my eyes over to Katsuki who stood there watching me, a slight smile gracing his face.

"Come lie with me, Alpha," I whispered and scoot over. No nest was complete without an Alpha.

I could see Katsuki's eyes trailing over the image before him. I could almost imagine what he was seeing while I wished he would be happy with me. I mean, his mate was naked from the waist down, wearing his shirt, and inside a nest built for breeding. Was it even breeding if I couldn't give him children? I tensed my jaw as the thought ran through my body like ice.

I hated that I had ruined myself. Was that why he refused to mate with me? He knew. Somehow he knew that I was broken now.

Katsuki must have sensed my discomfort because he knelt down while pulling off his shirt. I watched him and swallowed as he pressed his shirt up beside my head, his scent assaulting me and forcing my eye closed with a low moan that passed my parted lips. He crawled into the space beside me, lying down and opening his arms slightly for me to move in closer.

I immediately dove in, pressing my face into his shoulder while my hands rest flat on his chest. His heart was beating fast underneath my palms and I knew that he was aware I could hear it. I made him nervous I think, and I was not sure if I liked that or not.

I wanted things to be easier, but they never would be. Not until this all was over and I could leave. I knew Katsuki was only acting on instincts. That's all this would ever be. It was all it has ever been since he showed up at my house that day.

That hurt me more than I should have let it hurt.

Yet just now, when Katsuki pulled me closer and rested his head on top of mine, I felt like this could be real. I could be his perfect Omega.

His perfect mate.

I could be the perfect match for him and give him children and a home. I could love him and he could love me.

If only it weren't wishful thinking and I didn't know that in three days, I would be leaving again. This time for good. I wouldn't come crawling back. I wouldn't wait for him, and once I was back to my full health, positive that the snap would not kill me, I would break our bond.

I would be the one to do it. Katsuki would finally be happy and able to live his life, and maybe I would be able to find my happiness as well. Maybe.

Chapter Text

𝓚𝓪𝓽𝓼𝓾𝓴𝓲 𝓑𝓪𝓴𝓾𝓰𝓸𝓾

 

Izuku clung to me for days. He practically traped me in his nest, only letting me up to bring food or take bathroom breaks. My parents had left for the duration of his heat. My mother had to pretty much drag my father away; he still didn't trust Izuku being alone with me although I was an adult now.

Plus, it was not like I haven't already been in less than decent situations with him during that first wave of his heat. It was too late for my old man to be gruffed over the idea that Izuku and I were being intimate. It was to be expected when an Omega goes into heat around their mate.

I had been surprised though, that Izuku wasn't more lost in the flames of his heat. After that first wave and the night after, the greenette all but held all his pain and desires within. I had no clue why he would do that considering I helped him through it a few times before. Maybe it wasn't bothering him as much anymore considering this was the last day of his heat cycle?

All I knew was that Izuku hadn't bothered to let me know when he was struggling; although, I could still see and smell when he was going through a wave of heat. I wanted nothing more than to take him wholly and thoroughly each time his scent would release in the air. It was suffocating in the best way. I never imagined ever being turned on, let alone wanting to breed the Omega that I practically grew up with. It was strange and confusing, but I couldn't deny it any longer.

I wanted him. It may only be physically, but that was a start. The rest would come eventually.

Izuku stayed curled up in his nest for the past two days, and today was the last of his heat cycle. I had been shocked that he no longer asked me to help relieve the fever that came with an Omega's heat. He only asked to be held in my arms, skin to skin contact that seemed to soothe him. He slept a lot as well. I didn't care though. I knew he needed his rest and my instincts were chomping at the bit, begging me not to leave my mate alone even though he seemed to be relatively fine without me. Especially today.

The greenette was quiet for the majority of the time we shared. Only soft whimpers of pain and flinches each time a cramp or wave would hit. He refused to let me soothe his heat again, and even though it might have been weird for me at first, touching him like that, I knew that he was in pain and my instincts were clawing under my skin, telling me to soothe him.

But when I tried to, Izuku would just shake his head with a pained expression while twisting his features. So I didn't touch him in any sexual way since that first 24 hours of his cycle. I just held him in my arms while he squirmed and whined until the pain died down enough for him to rest. I scented him every chance I could get, knowing that it would help to calm his symptoms. He never stopped me from scenting him and for that I was thankful. It pained me knowing he was hurting while I stood by doing nothing.

It was getting late and I knew that Izuku would need to eat soon. He had been living off of plain eggs, toast, and fruit for almost a week. It was all he could stomach, but now that his heat was coming to an end I could give him something more filling.

I tried not to think about him leaving again. I wanted to bring it up to him but it wasn't fair with his state of mind at the moment. He wouldn't be thinking clearly. I may not know much about Omega biology or nature, but I knew that their instincts kick into overdrive for about a week and they run off those emotions. Rational thought would be at a low unless he was particularly good at fighting his urges. Izuku must be strong to fight his instincts for so long during his heat and not start begging again like he had that first night.

Again, I was honestly impressed but also a bit worried. Why was he fighting so hard and not letting me help him? He barely let me help him to the bathroom to shower or use the toilet. He only ate the food I cooked because he knew that walking to the kitchen and cooking his own would be too exhausting. He refused to let me help him when a wave would hit yet he would rut his little body against mine as waves of desire would seep from his pores.

I felt pretty pathetic knowing I could only assist him so much before he would push me away again.

Izuku had fallen asleep again, one of his many naps, and I slipped out of the jumbled up nest to go make him something to eat. The greenette let out a whimper and his fingers twitched out as if to grab hold of me and I couldn't fight the gentle smirk that pulled at my lips. I crouched down and held his sleeping face in my hands while leaning down and pressing my lips to his cheek.

"I'll be right back," I cooed softly and smiled when his body relaxed beneath my hands. His hands went limp on the soft blankets underneath him and his head lulled to the side in his sleep. I slowly stood back up and made my way to the kitchen before he could wake up and notice I was gone.

Izuku was different than I remembered him and I didn't like that it felt as if I no longer knew him. Our past had turned our relationship sour. I knew that I let it turn my once fascination and loyalty to him into a rage, a disgust, and a pain that had me bitter and unforgiving. It was stupid of me.

However, Izuku never once took it out on me. He might have snapped when I was pushing too far or voicing my anger, but he never shot fire back at me. He just took what I dished out as if he had already accepted what I was saying to him.

I frowned while digging out the leftovers I had managed to cook for dinner last night for myself since the Omega was only eating certain foods. I reheated the sauce before boiling fresh rice. I didn't even make the curry sauce extra spicey like I normally eat it because I knew it would be hard on Izuku's stomach.

I placed my hands on the counter and leaned over, sighing a heavy breath as I waited for the rice to boil and the sauce to reheat. I had never been more confused with myself in my 18 years. I knew that I was younger than Izuku and probably more immature in many ways. The Omega needed someone to look out for him, to care for him, and to hold him steady when he felt like the world would crumble.

As a mate -- as a boyfriend -- I needed to be there for him. But I wasn't his boyfriend and we were barely mates.

I had been pushing him away since the day I found out we were mated, and now that our pairing was settling in and I no longer hated the Omega. I felt as if I was losing him as he pulled away from me in his heat. He no longer wanted me to soothe the ache and to claim his body like mine. That first night he had all but clawed me to bits while trying to pull himself closer. He had begged me to do the same with him, and now he would only let me hold him. That hurt more than I ever thought something could have hurt me. A soft chuckle huffed from my lips as I shook my head humorlessly. Since when have I been so damn emotional?

I knew what this feeling was. I felt it before when Izuku had disappeared on me four years ago. It had broken me more than I had realized at the time. I opened up to Izuku and let him get close, only for him to leave without a word for years. Now I understood why, but I also remembered how I asked all around for him.

I begged my parents and ran off to Inko's house more times than I could remember just trying to get in contact with the greenette. His absent had left scars on my heart that I just buried away with thick layers of walls around the broken bits of my heart.

It took so long for me to just feel alright again.

And now he was back and I couldn't wrap my head around why part of wanted to run away and another part wanted to lock him down and make him stay with me. He couldn't leave again; I wouldn't let him. I wanted to make this work because as much as I hate to admit it, he has woven his thin fingers into the threads of my heart and I feared that if he stepped away again, then he'd be unable to untangle his grasp on me and it would rip the last bit of my heart out along with him.

But Izuku had asked to stay with me when his friends wanted to take him away. He had begged me to stay with him during his heat. Maybe not so much in words, but rather the way he clung to me and pressed closer each time my hands would caress his soft sides.

Each time I'd place my palm on the small of his back to pull him into my chest at night. He responded to me in ways that had me swallowing a lump in my throat and wanting to keep him close. I was scared. Scared he would uproot and leave my life again just as I let myself foolishly get closer to him.

Whatever it was, I felt like it was laughing in my face. His heat was ending and his friends would be back for him tomorrow. What now? He was changing me. Izuku was changing me and I was accepting that. He was my mate and I needed to start acting like it.

"Katsuki?" Izuku whispered and I jumped out of my thoughts while turning around quickly. He was standing there, covered in one of my loose shirts. His messy curls were flat on one side from sleeping on his side. His cream-colored skin stood out nicely in contrast to the black shirt that was hanging mid-thigh on him, and for once I wanted to run my hands over the length of his limps. I wanted to get lost in him and explore every dip and curve of his body more. I pealed my eyes away from his bare thighs and back up to his clear and amused eyes.

"Yeah?" I turned back away to face the pot of rice and stirred it quickly before removing it from the heat and dishing a small portion into a ceramic bowl.

"Smells good," He murmured and walked over to me. This was the first time he had been out of the bedroom since his heat began. His eyes were more clear and less clouded with the pains of his heat. His scent was less heavy as well and I knew that it was passing quickly for him. I was glad, though it was odd for his heat to not last the full five days. Maybe it was because he was thrown into it early? I hummed and poured the reheated sauce over the rice.

"Thanks, how are you feeling?" I asked and stuck a spoon in his bowl before placing it on the island counter and pulling out the tall bar stool for him. I gestured for him to sit and he blushed softly. He scooted into the seat while staring at his bowl and licking his lips. My mind instantly ran off course as blood rushed to my groin. Fuck, get a grip. I huffed and turned back around to stalk over to the refrigerator and grabbed two water bottles for us.

Spending nearly five days in a room with an Omega in heat had been a test from the goddess herself, I'm sure, and my mate, nonetheless.

I had thought about taking him on several occasions. Jumping him when he rutted up against me in his sleep or when he pressed his naked lower half into my groin in search of friction. But I knew that he didn't want my help with that anymore, and would never do something like that without his consent, especially when he had been refusing my offers to help him over the days. I was unsure of what was happening between us.

Was the heat messing with my mind? Were my instincts forcing me to feel this observant and attached to the Omega? I honestly had no clue and that bothered me more and more. I liked having him close to me. I liked being affectionate with him. However, we still had much to talk about. He had been upset about Denki and trying to leave just as I had just given myself over to the fact that I wanted Izuku in my life and was willing to work past our past. There was much we the two of us had not handled.

"I'm feeling better. The fog is going away," Izuku huffed as if what he said was somehow normal information. Maybe I was just nieve, but I had no idea what he meant by fog and I assume he could tell by the look on my face. That, and the fact that he laughed a bit and shook his head at my expression.

"It's like heavy fog clouds over my mind when I am in heat. It's damn near impossible to think straight or even remember things clearly with all the dull pains and inconvenient lust." He trailed off and quickly stuck the spoon in his mouth. His eyes dart away from me and down to the bowl of curry as his nose scrunches up from his mouthful of steaming hot rice.

"Well, I'm glad you're feeling better then." My eyes trail over him as he eats in silence. He seemed deep in thought while he slowly finishes his dinner and I couldn't bring myself to ask what was on his mind. I'm sure he was confused about the things we had done together during his heat. Albeit not much, it was a lot more intimate for two mates that had all but given up on each other.

I felt my lips twitch as he kept scrunching his nose and rubbing it while sniffling.

Cute.

It wasn't that spicy, but to Izuku I'm sure it was more than enough of the spice.

There were purple sunlit hues of the evening light that fell through the windows and cast a delicate glow around Izuku's frame. I had to freeze and take in the almost angelic ring of light that cast a silhouette around him.

Once again, the Omega that I had spent so much time hating seemed more and more like perfection rather than destruction. I couldn't tear myself away from how endearing and domestic this whole thing was.

Him in my clothes, in my kitchen, covered in my scent and eating my food. Another side of the enclosure that I had around my heart began to crumble as I watched him intently. I waited for him to finish eating before helping him back to the bedroom where he immediately tugged me over to the nest he had built in the corner of my room.

Although, I could tell something was going on with him as his body trembled up against me and he tucked his head into my chest. Maybe his heat wasn't over yet? He clung to me desperately though I didn't know why. I wasn't going anywhere.

So I held him tightly and pressed soft kisses to the top of his head while he dug his fists into my shirt and pulled me closer.

For once, I was happy with how things were going between us. I could only hope that when tomorrow comes that he chooses to stay with me. I would explain it all to him in the morning and let him know the reasons for my behavior towards him at first. I would explain to him and hopefully, he would understand that I had been scared.

Nonetheless, I had made up my mind that night I had gone to see Denki. The night I had kissed my mate for the first time and had gotten a taste of the hidden passions my Omega had for me. I wanted to have that again. I wanted to be happy for once and not fight him as he tried to enter my life once more.

He wouldn't leave me again as I had been afraid of, he had made that clear by trying so hard to gain my affection and by begging his friends to let him have his heat by my side. My mate had been preening for my attention.

Well, he had it now, all of it, and my love for him would surely follow at the rate my feelings were developing for the greenette that was pressed into my chest, snoring lightly with his legs tangled between mine. His small hands tucked against my chest as he sleeps, soaking up my warmth that I knew soothed the ache within him at the moment. I had made my decision and was sticking to it. I wanted my mate.

I wanted Izuku.

Chapter Text

𝓘𝔃𝓾𝓴𝓾 𝓜𝓲𝓭𝓸𝓻𝓲𝔂𝓪

 

I had been pulling away; I knew that. But I couldn't help it for many reasons. Katsuki was being kind to me and I wasn't sure how to receive that affection from him while still protecting my heart. In my heat, all I wanted was to give in to my desires and once again let him claim me.

Take me.

Mark me as his and his alone. However, I know what when my heat faded away and I was back in my right state of mind that I would regret letting things get that far.

My Alpha had another. Someone else that he had gotten close to over the years and now there was such a strain on our bond that I was in pain all the time. How could he not feel my pain? I knew I hadn't been mistaken when I found out he was my mate. He should feel my discomfort at least a small amount.

But he didn't allude to it at all. Katsuki never seemed to care when I was in pain over the strain on our bond and I knew it was because he didn't care about me the way I wanted to care for him.

I had let myself be weak on the first day of my heat. I let myself cave to the desires and pleasures of my mate. I had spent too much time alone for these periods of time, so that when Katsuki had pulled me into his arms, I lost all restraint and only wanted to bask in the pleasures that my mate could bring me.

After that first 24 hours, I must have gotten the majority of the lust out of my system enough to clear my head. I was mortified at first. I wasn't planning on staying around any longer than I had to and letting him touch me like that would only hurt more when I left. I hadn't let anyone touch me like that. He was the first, and probably the last for a long while. At least until the bond was broken and we both could move on past each other.

However, as the days trickled on by, my restraint was dwindling. I could feel Katsuki's frustration that I was refusing his help. But I just didn't want it. I had been fine on my own for years and I sure as hell could handle my heat without his hands on me for one more. I had let him touch me once. That would be enough for me.

Only it wasn't enough; not at all, and the more time I spent fighting off my desires the more I began to regret my decisions. Not because of my Omegan desires to be bred by my Alpha -- but rather my own selfish desires.

I was leaving in the morning. I had it set up, better than last time. I would slip out unnoticed in the early hours of the morning and head home where I had a whole plan set up. Katsuki wouldn't find me. I needed to be away from him and my friends. I couldn't burden them any longer with my own fucked up situation.

I would get better -- and then break our bond on my terms. I didn't need Katsuki.

I didn't.

I told myself I didn't, but I know that deep down I would never find the potential happiness that I could have with Katsuki.

However, my current pain wasn't worth it. My Alpha's kindness would be short-lived. It was my heat that clouded his judgment and made him look after me during my heat. He had been so gentle and considerate that I swore my heart would melt into a puddle of loved-up mush even through all my lust-driven thoughts running through my mind. But it wouldn't last. I was unhealthy at the moment. I was sick still and who's to say that Katsuki wouldn't leave once he found out I no longer would have children?

I was selfish. He held me so close each night, petting me and pressing me to his bare chest while he slept by my side -- in my nest -- scenting me -- holding me.

I was selfish as I lied awake, only a few hours after I originally fell asleep. The clock told me that I had mere hours before my friends would be here to retrieve me and I couldn't fall back asleep.

Katsuki was to my left and sleeping soundly. His chest was naked and a warm ivory tone that made him slightly darker in color compared to my alabaster skin. I turned over to place my hand over his heart, needing to feel his warmth and life under my fingers before I never had this experience again. His breathing slowed under my touch and I had to pull myself closer. I needed to be closer.

I loved him. I was in love with him.

My chest tightened at the thought fleeted through my mind faster than I could have imagined. But it was there. I had thought it up and stored it in my memory. I loved him, and that's why it hurt so much what I was about to do.

I wanted to experience what it felt to be loved by him before it was gone for good. I wanted to know what it would feel like to have him kiss me while exploring my body. He didn't love me, but I would imagine. I could pretend. I could dream it up that his kisses and touches were rooted in love rather than lust or instinct.

I was selfish, and I wanted something for myself. I wanted him for myself.

Just this once.

So -- I rolled over onto my stomach and pushed myself up on my hands and knees, careful not to wake the sleeping Alpha beside me. I didn't need him pushing me away just yet. Not before I got his attention. I'm sure he would think this was the heat talking for me, but I knew it wasn't. My heat was fading. My cramps were barely there and I could think clearly what I wanted. I wanted Katsuki.

I wanted him to want me back.

I crawled so that I was hovering over the sleeping Alpha with my hands placed on either side of his head and pressed into the pillows. I was perched over his hips and I bit back a low whine at the sight. Seeing him from this angle, it wasn't natural in my heat to be on top of my Alpha. But he looked so beautiful under me. I had to stop and stare while soaking up his features and storing them to memory, burning him in my mind so that I would never forget the way he looked right now.

Call me selfish, I knew I was right now. I released my scent into the air while carefully leaning down and pressing my face to the crook of his neck -- inhaling deeply the scent of my mate.

Katsuki tensed in his sleep but his arms wound around me and pulled me down on him. He hugged me to his chest and I pressed my mouth to his scent glands, laving gently on the spot that carried his most pure scent. I squeezed my eyes shut and tuned out everything else while I soaked up my mate. Committing to memory his scent, his taste, his warmth. Everything that I would be leaving behind.

"Izuku?" Katsuki's sleep-filled and scratchy voice huffed once before I felt him freeze up under me. His arms tightened from the shock of waking up to my gentle assault on his body.

"What are you doing?" He mumbled and unwound his arms from my waist. But he didn't remove them from their hold on me, only shifted as he placed his palms on my hips and rubbed gentle circles along the bone. He dipped his thumbs into the soft spots on either side of my hips that had me stifling a groan. Maybe it wouldn't be too difficult persuading him to take me.

"I want you," I whispered into his neck, hiding from his surely shocked and confused expression. Part of me expected him to shut me down, deny me, and shove me off his body. Another part of me expected him to just laugh.

What I was not expecting was for him to curl his fingers into my hips and roll over, pinning me to the nest beneath us. My eyes widened as the Katsuki stared down on me with dark and dilated eyes.

"Your heat?" He clipped his question off quickly. His voice was strained and I knew he was fighting himself from ripping into me like his instincts were telling him to.

But I didn't care. I wanted that. It was passion to me and it was the most of his passion that I would ever get. So, I would let him ravish me. Just this once. I slipped my legs open under his hips and his jaw tightened as his eyes flicked down to what I was offering. I knew I was still in the last stretch of my heat -- even if my symptoms were fading.

I knew what he was staring at.

My thighs were wet with slick and I could feel even more begin to trickle as he stared at me. He was fighting it, and that needed to stop. I reached up and grabbed his face in my hands while wrapping my legs around his hips and tugging him down on top of me. My heels dug into his ass in a desperate attempt to keep him pressed to me.

"I want you," I repeated myself as he watched me but I could see the snap. His jaw relaxed some and his eyes trailed over what little of my body he could still see when his own form was blanketing mine. "Take me, Alpha," I begged softly, and rocked my hips into his. Katsuki groaned and he grabbed my wrists before he quickly pinned them over my head.

"Are you fuckin' sure about this? I don't think I can stop if you keep teasing, so don't play around with this, idiot." He huffed and my eyes narrowed at him in curiosity. I knew my scent wasn't that thick right now. My heat was dying down, so why was he acting as if I would throw him into a rut?

"I'm not as strong as you, Izu." What was he talking about? I wasn't strong. I was weak. I had always been weak. Katsuki sighed and I felt my face burn. I had to bite down on my lip at how lost he looked hovering over me. It almost felt real. Almost.

But it wasn't, and I was too selfish to stop this.

"Take me, Katsuki. I want this. I want you." It wasn't a lie. I wasn't lying to him. Katsuki growled lowly and ground his hips into me. Sparks shot up my spine as he moved against me and I could tell he was trying to hold back. But I didn't want that. If this was all I would ever have of my mate, then I wanted it all. I wanted him to ravish me wholly and not hold back.

Katsuki pushed back, removing his body from its position over me only enough to sit back on his haunches and run fingers over my thighs. I sucked in a sharp breath as his fingers curled around the soft flesh and rubbed over the wet skin of my inner thighs. His eyes were dark and his chest rose and fell rapidly.

"You smell so fuckin' good," Katsuki almost whimpered as he focused in on my parted thighs. I knew how much strength he had to be holding back with me. I was still in heat. I was presenting to him. Yet he was able to take the time and trace his fingers slowly up my inner thighs that were spread open for him.

However, I couldn't hold back my sudden whines when his finger brushed over my entrance and he slowly circled the pad of his thumb around the soaked rim.

"Ngh - Haa," I arched my back as he slowly rubbed over my sensitive area. He traced it delicately and I shivered each time he would press a little harder -- almost dipping in. He did that for a while, careful caressing my skin until I was shaking with every press of his thumb.

Sometimes, he would trail his fingers up and over the sensitive flesh below my balls, and fuck, it was maddening. I wanted more -- yet he took his time. His eyes were black with desire and I was becoming impatient with his teasing. I didn't have time for this. I didn't have time.

But my silent pleas were finally heard and Katsuki shifted, wrapped his fingers around my member and giving it a few slow pumps before he stopped again.

"What do you want me to do?" The Alpha spoke lowly and chills ran through my body, breaking out my arms and legs with gooseflesh. I could barely focus after all the teasing and I just wanted him inside me.

I wanted it to be him. I wanted my mate to have me in ways no other would have me. Even after the bond was broken between us, he would still have had me first.

I would belong to him. It was selfish, but it was all I could get.

"Inside -- I want you inside me," I pant while his fingers continued to tease my leaking dick. Fingering the slit with the pad of his thumb, he was trailing precum down the sensitive underside. I had to busy my hands into my nest to stop myself from clawing up my mate's body. How was he so calm?

"If I take you now, I won't stop, Izuku. I don't want to hurt you," He muttered and I looked up at his face. His eyes were on my lower half, dark with desire and his cheeks flushed. My Alpha was losing his control.

Good. He could have me. It would pay for my sins and make us even. I no longer would be the only one to have hurt the other while lost the throes of passion and desire. He could hurt me and I would be thankful. He could have me, and I would surrender.

I could handle his assault on my body. I would wear his marks proudly and would gladly accept any sore hips and back pain from our mating. It was all I would get from him. I would take it.

Spreading my thighs, I lifted my hips eagerly and reached towards him. I hooked my fingers in the waistband of his sweats and started to tug them down. He quickly assisted me until they were long gone -- thrown lazily across the room as well as his boxers. His erection sprang free from his clothing and hung heavily, pointed at me. My whole body tensed up as I looked him over. He was so beautiful -- but this was going to hurt.

Sensing my distress, whether it be from the sheer size of him or my own guilt of what my mate would be waking up to, Katsuki pushed his hands to my chest and grabbed my right hand before placing it over his heart. It was beating fiercely under my palm and I knew what he was telling me. He was nervous too.

"Katsuki," I whined, my heart throbbing as it washes over me that this is the first and last time I will be with him this way. "Kiss me. Please -- kiss me." I begged softly.

No shame coated my pleas for his affection. I could deal with the shame later. I needed my mate to put his claim on me and take what little part of me that I could offer to him. He already had my heart. But I wanted him to have my body and soul as well.

Katsuki growled and pressed his lips to mine. I whimpered under his weight and kissed back greedily. It was sloppy and uncoordinated but he didn't seem to care. He took my lips firmly and bit down on the plump flesh while reaching between our bodies and pressing his finger to my rim. I tensed up as he pressed in gently. My slick coated his finger and eased the sting as he rubbed firmly to work me open.

I gasped when he quiet easily worked his finger knuckle deep into my heat. My head lulled to the side as breathy moans and pathetic whines for more slipt my tongue over and over again.

He carefully prepared me. For that, I was grateful. I didn't want this to hurt. Not like that at least. I just wanted to be his just once before I let him move on.

"Gods, Izuku --" Katsuki breathed heavily and my eyes opened again. When had I closed them? He was looking down at me as he sunk his two fingers slowly into my body. I clenched around them and he growled lowly, flicking them up and pressing against something that had me seeing stars.

"Ahh - haa - Katsuki, please," I cried out while arching up. I found myself absentmindedly pushing down and fucking myself on his fingers and he let me. He let me use him for my pleasure and I wondered why. Why was he letting me use him like this?

"Do you have a condom?" The blond Alpha all but growled out. He flicked his fingers up, curling and pressing that one spot until I was writhing on the edge of release. I shook my head. I was infertile by now. There was no need for condoms. Katsuki groaned and pulled his fingers out. I whined and looked down at him.

"I can't fuck you without a condom, Omega." His words held no venom and I knew he was reminding me who I was -- what I was. An Omega. To him, I could still get pregnant. If only he knew. I shook my head again and tried to steady my breathing.

"It's f - fine. I'm on birth control," It was a small lie. He didn't need to know why I couldn't get pregnant. Be it birth control or years of suppressants. Either way, there would be no impregnation. Not ever.

Katsuki hesitated for a moment before slowly pressing his fingers back inside me, never breaking eye contact as he sunk in. My eyes rolled as he teased my walls. The wet squelching sound of my slick only made me moan louder and I thanked the goddess that his parents were gone.

I felt when it happened and I tensed up. He kneeled up and pressed the tip of his cock to my entrance and I all but backed out. I wish this were different and that he would be taking me this way after he confessed his love for me. But again, I was selfish in many ways. I thought I deserved to be selfish for once.

"You ready?" Katsuki asked and I nodded. I noticed a bit of worry in his eyes. He was nervous too. Would he regret this? Would I regret this?

I didn't have time to think of a reply to my own question before he was pressing forward and I was being stretched by his length. My insides burned in the most delicious way until he had sunk completely inside my heat and pressed his hands firmly to my belly. I whimpered and squeezed my eyes shut.

I could feel him rubbing soothing circles along my stomach to ease the pressure and pain that was stinging my insides. His brows were furrowed in concentration and little huffs of strained exhales were leaving his lips as he held still. His face was contorted as his fingers curled inward and dug lightly into the flesh of my stomach. He was holding back -- letting me adjust as my body burned from the stretch.

But I couldn't focus on that with the innocently erotic expression my mate was making. Our hips were pressed together and I gasped when he shifted on his knees to get comfortable. He was being so careful that I almost ignored my own pain just to let him move. I wanted to see his face as he enjoyed my body. I was his. Finally.

We stayed still for a few minutes until I had relaxed. Katsuki leaned down and pressed his lips to mine sweetly before littering my neck with soft kisses. He left a trail of lights bruises, I'm sure, and when I couldn't take it anymore I began to roll my hips. He slipped out of me barely an inch before I rolled them again and forced him to sink back to the hilt.

"Fuck," He growled and gripped the pillows behind my head. His teeth were clenched and I smiled. I wanted him to let go. I needed him to take me -- to love me.

"Please, Alpha. Move," I whined softly and arched my back. I spread my legs open more to give him room and he hissed out a string of curses as my walls tighten around him. I could feel him inside me and I groaned with a small wince.

"Fuckin' hell, Izuku," Katsuki grunted and rolled his hips slightly. This was new to us both so I let him experiment. The stretch was painful but the longer he slowly rolled his hips and worked me open, the less I felt of pain and the more I began to feel the blinding pleasure that came with being mated.

I gasped and dug my fingers into his hair, pulling his lips down to mine and claiming them harshly. He let me pull him down with only a single grunt of shock rather than disapproval. He was letting me get away with so much. He was letting me pull him around and lead and I wondered why? He was so confusing. Why was he letting me do some much with him. I had expected him to just fuck me and get it over with -- but I was glad he hadn't.

"Please," I gasped when he pressed into me, his cock coming into contact with a spot inside of me. I cried out while clinging to him.

"Fuck me!" I begged, not caring anymore. I wanted him to claim me now. I wanted him to use me and spare no inch of my heated body. I wanted to wake up every morning with this memory on my mind.

Katsuki growled and grabbed my legs. He shoved them back to my chest as I witnessed the snap of his self-control and I mewled. His eyes were dark as he hovered over me.

"Tell me if it's too much, Izuku. As much as I am loving this, I don't want to hurt you." He said through clenched teeth and I nodded quickly. He growled lowly and snapped his hips forward, driving into me quickly before pulling out so that only the tip remained within.

My mouth fell open as my walls tried to constrict onto something from his sudden withdrawal. Anything. I was about to complain and beg him to get back in, but I only managed sharp squeak when he slammed back into me so hard that my body moved and pushed my head back to the wall.

Katsuki chuckled and curled his arm above my head to hold it from slamming into the wall. I gasped as he began thrusting into me and he pressed his face to my neck. All I could do was hold on as he brought my body to new heights. The pain was fading, being replaced by a deep coil that wound me intil I swore I would snap. I could barely breath. Every time I tried, it was stolen away with harsh thrusts. I could only cry out and cling to him.

"Ha! K- Katsuki!" I screamed out when he snapped his hips forward then ground into me.

"S - Shit, you're so good," My Alpha praised me and I keened happily. I couldn't speak if I wanted to. Only breathy and choked out whines and croons for more. My chest rumbled with a heavy purr as he pressed kisses to my collar bone and nipped his way down to my nipples. His warm tongue flicked over the pebble-like bud and I moaned.

He wasn't just fucking me, and if he was, he was good at making me believe this was something more. I greedily pulled him back up to me and slammed my lips to his. It took him off guard but he quickly began kissing back before pulling all the way out of me and flipping me onto my hands and knees. My body submitted to him quickly and with a loud cry as I pushed my ass back towards him.

"So greedy, little mate," Katsuki growled lowly and my eyes pricked with tears. He had never called me that before and my insides twisted in both pain and pleasure at hearing him speak it into existence.

Why'd you have to do that, Katsuki? Don't tease me when you know this isn't real.

Tears ran down my flushed cheeks as he sunk himself back into me slowly while grabbing firmly onto my hips. He filled me up and I gasped while gripping into the bedding.

My mate ravished me for what felt like hours. He shook my body with every thrust until I was spilling my release to the blankets under me. Even then, Katsuki didn't stop his ministration on my body.

He fucked me until I was choking on my own breath. He filled me to depts that I didn't know existed. Katsuki kissed my nape until he bit lightly, almost teasingly. As if to say I belonged to him -- as if to say he would have marked me if I had asked.

The Alpha slammed into me roughly and I knew I would be sore in the morning. I knew I would wear his bruises and scent for days. Yet, that was exactly what I wanted. Katsuki growled against my nape and I felt his knot at my rim. I shouted excitedly at the pressure that burned my hole.

That. I wanted that.

"Fuck! Knot me, Alpha!" I begged and my arms shook from holding myself up for so long. Katsuki nipped at my nape and I gasped.

"Please, Katsuki I want your knot. So bad -- Ahh -- Hngh!" I mewled when he bit lightly at my nape and hissed as I clenched down on him as he fucked into me.

"Oh shit, are - are you sure?" My mate groaned at my neck and I nodded quickly, my orgasm building again with the promise of my Alpha's knot. The Omega in me was preening with the thought of being bred and slick gushed from around Katsuki's cock.

"Goddamn, Izu!" He growled and bit the side of my neck, away from my scent gland, but still digging his teeth into my flesh. He lightly pierced the skin and I winced at the pain but moaned as his knot pressed against me. I cried out and screamed when his knot pushed past my rim and locked us together.

I gasped and wheezed on my breath as I emptied myself once more while Katsuki pumped my body full of his hot release. He growled and held onto me by my neck with his teeth. I trembled and my arms gave out on me. My body fell to the nest and he releasesed my neck. My chest was pressed to the blankets and my ass up in the air, still connected to my mate as spurts of his cum continued to pump me full.

"S- Shit, hold still," He panted while rubbing my hips to soothe any discomfort from being tied to him. But it didn't hurt at all. I loved it. I never wanted to leave. However, I shook that thought away as he eased our bodies onto our sides with my back to his front and his hands rubbing on my belly and hips.

"It will go down soon," Katsuki grumbled, his voice still thick with sexual pleasure, and I had to stop myself from crying all over again. This was so wrong. Why did I do this?

I squeezed my eyes shut and tried to regulate my breathing as Katsuki held me. I knew this had worn us both out and I smiled just a bit when I heard my Alpha snoring lightly into my hair. I waited until his knot deflated and he slipped out of me, my body leaking the evidence of our mating, before I carefully got up and made my way to the bathroom to clean up.

I winced as I walked and rubbed firmly on my lower back until I made it to the bathroom and turned on the shower. I would clean up and then go back to bed for just a while longer. Just a little longer.

I looked up into the mirror and frowned. My neck was peppered with love bites and teeth marks. Tears were running down my flushed cheeks and I dashed at them quickly. Katsuki's fingerprints were bruised into my sides, hips, and thighs. However, those marks didn't bother me and no matter how badly my body was throbbing after our mating, it didn't compare to the pain in my chest.

I placed my hand over my heart and willed the pain to go away as I waited for the shower water to heat up. I should have just left without doing that with Katsuki. I shouldn't have done that. I should not have done that. It hurts. I wanted to regret it --

But I was selfish and my mate wasn't going to be my mate for much longer. I was selfish. Was this worth it?

Chapter Text

𝓘𝔃𝓾𝓴𝓾 𝓜𝓲𝓭𝓸𝓻𝓲𝔂𝓪

 

I crawled back into the nest beside Katsuki and silently cursed myself. The dull throbbing in my hips acted as a constant reminder of what I had just done. The shower did little to wash away the guilt that seemed to cover every inch of my skin. It had been wonderful while it lasted and after he knotted me, my heat symptoms went away. My instincts were telling me to be happy, proud that my Alpha claimed me. But I couldn't let myself bask in the afterglow of our mating, not when I was being so selfish.

Katsuki was out cold, snoring softly while possessively holding me to his chest. I had already got dressed as well as packed. My bags were by the front door and ready for my departure. I checked the digital clock on the bedside table and frowned at the time. My phone buzzed gently in my pocket and I knew that was the text saying that my ride was here. Mina and Shinso were here to pick me up as I planned.

However, leaving the nest and the warmth of Katsuki's arms proved to be more difficult than I had imagined. His face was peaceful. His normal scowl seemed to fade away when he slept, replaced by an expressionless mask that made him look gentle, docile even. His lips were parted just the tiniest amount with his cheek pressed into the pillows. I gently traced the tip of my finger over his features. One by one, memorizing and saying goodbye.

I managed to slip out of the nest undetected and slipped my shoes on by the door. My chest ached but not because I was leaving. I wanted to leave so that Katsuki could move on and live the life he wanted. This was the only way I could make up for what I put him through. I hurt because I had mated with him and everything instinct in my body told me to run back to the safety of my nest. Leaving right after mating was unnatural for fated mates. Although he didn't mark me, we had strengthened our bond and I could physically feel how calm he was at the moment.

I could feel his peace as he slept and I tried to force myself not to believe that what I was doing was wrong on so many levels. I had left him before without a word and with now goodbye. This time it wasn't because I had fucked up and needed to keep him physically safe. This time, I needed to protect his heart. He would never love me how he could love another. I had hurt him, and he deserves someone that wasn't -- me.

Shinso was at the door and quickly took my bags. Mina ushered me to the car and paused when she opened the door for me. She looked at me curiously and I frowned while instinctively pulling my sweater closer to my body. I knew she could tell and her quick once over on my body with her eyes told me that she was confused. I reeked of Katsuki and sex.

"You two mated," It wasn't a question and all I could do was nod once and slip into the backseat. Mina looked at me carefully for a second longer before shutting the door gently and getting into the passenger's seat while Shinso slid behind the wheel.

"Got everything?" Shinso asked, turning to look at me with a quizzical glance. I watched as he sniffed and made a face, but before he could say anything Mina jabbed him in the side with her elbow. I growled under my breath at the awkward tension and bared my teeth.

"We fucked. Now get over it. I know I stink of it so just drive already and stop looking at me like that -- I want to go home." I snapped and watched as Shinso coughed to cover his shock.

Mina gave me a soft smile and I balled my fists in my lap. The car pulled away from the house and I spared a glance back as it slowly faded away into the distance. I could still feel Katsuki's peaceful state of being but as the distance expanded between us our connection began to fade.

I was glad. He didn't need to know that I was breaking apart inside. Hold it together. Just a while longer. I waited until we were far enough away. I held it together, just long enough for the connection to break before I let myself snap.

I dug my fingers into my thighs and winced as a dull pain shot up my spine and I growled at myself. Katsuki's marks lay just below my jeans. His fingerprints marked into my pale skin. I could feel him everywhere. My thighs, my hips, my back, my neck, my -- insides all held the reminders that I had been so close to him for just a moment. He was within my reach for only a moment.

But I had to let him go.

I tugged at my hair and pulled my knees to my chest as the pain within roared to life. I had kept it together for an hour of the drive but I felt so sick to my stomach. This had to get easier at some point though right? My distress was thick and Mina growled from the front seat as I panted into my legs. Shinso muttered under his breath and I cried out into the silence of the car.

"Pull over," Mina whispered and I felt the car being slowed to the side of the road somewhere. The car had shut off and before I know it, Mina and Shinso are slipping into the back seat with me.

"Can you scent him?" Mina asked and I hissed, my head snapping over to glare at her. I didn't want to lose Katsuki's scent just yet. Not yet. Please just -- not yet.

"I can try --" Shinso whispered but his voice sounded strained. I felt my anger spike and as I was about to lash out, Mina's arms wrapped around me and pinned my arms to my side. I cried out and began kicking at the back of the seats in front of him.

"Shh, Izu honey I am sorry." Mina cried out with me as I fought her grasp. But she was stronger than me. She was an Alpha and could easily hold me down. Her hands fisted in my hair and pulled my head to the side and I screamed.

Not my neck. Katsuki had scented me there. His teeth marks lingered along my throat and I hissed as they tried to cover the most intimate place my mate had scented me. It wasn't even a mate mark, but the indentions of his teeth on my neck had my Omega possessive of the artificial mate mark.

"Did he mark him?" Shinso whispered, his voice held clear shock and I yowled. I wanted them to let me go and just let me have this one thing. It wouldn't kill me to let it linger just a bit longer. Just a little longer!

"Don't! Anything but t-that! L - Let me keep it a while longer!" I begged as tears run down my cheeks. Mina whimpers and yanked my head to the side more, giving me my answer.

"No!" I begged and Mina tensed her jaw.

"He wasn't marked, just bitten slightly. I can't do this because I am marked and mated. Shinso can you remover the scent mark?" Mina asked carefully and I thrashed around in her arms. It pulled my hair and hurt, but I didn't want this. I wanted to leave Katsuki on my skin a while longer. It would fade eventually, but until then, I wanted to feel him. Just a while longer. Please.

"I - I don't know," Shinso whispered and shifted closer to me. I hissed and yowled, kicking at the seats and trashing around. Mina had her grip on me and I knew I wouldn't get out of this. I couldn't fight off two Alphas. Shinso pressed a hand to my neck and I flinched harshly. It burnt along my skin and sent jolts of discomfort through my body. It was going against everything in me to have another Alpha touch my scent glands after being mated to my Alpha.

Shinso sniffed me while flinching and for once, I didn't know why he was struggling so much with being close to me. He had scented me so many times before with no problem. But now he seemed to be in pain. Mina growled as I snapped my teeth at her but I didn't care. I hated this.

"Fuck -- I can't, I'm sorry," Shinso growled and sat back while putting distance between us. Mina let up on her hold just a bit and I hissed again. I couldn't believe they would try do make me do that.

"Why?" Mina insisted and Shinso growled. His voice lowered and his pheromones seeped through his pores.

"Because I found my mate last week, remember? Fuck!" Shinso slammed his hands into the back of the seat in front of him and Mina let me go carefully. I hissed at her and ran my fingers through my hair to fix where she had grabbed me. I pressed my palm to my neck and over my gland, my heart rate calming once I protected what I was holding onto.

"Shit," Mina whispered and Shinso chuckled humorlessly before nodding and running his hands over his face in frustration.

"Yeah, shit is right. I have never felt repulsed or even enticed by an Omega's scent before. But now -- it makes me want to claw my skin off just thinking about touching Izuku, let alone scenting him." The indigo Alpha rumbled and I glared at them both.

"Fuck you both!" I hissed and Mina frowned. Her eyes begun to fill with tears the longer she stared at me.

"I'm sorry, Izuku -- I just -- Fuck," She growled lowly and shook her head as tears fell from her eyes. "I just don't want you to be in any pain, not anymore." She whispererd and my heart slammed within my chest.

I was just hurting everyone. I hurt Katsuki once before. I have been hurting Mina and Shinso, even Uraraka. Now, I had caused a rift between Shinso and his mate. He couldn't even touch me without hurting himself. My body shook with held-in tears. I refused to cry over Katsuki in front of them anymore. I refused.

I -- refused.

"Izuku," Shinso whispered and I blinked out the window. I didn't want to talk to them. I wanted to cry and let everything go. I hated feeling like this.

Like a monster.

I hurt everyone around me and no matter what I do, nothing changes. I was unfixable. I don't deserve my mate and that's the reason I left. Katsuki deserved to have a chance to heal and move on. I doubt he would even miss me when morning comes.

"Oh, honey," Mina whimpered and I choked back more tears.

"Izuku, it's okay to cry." She whispered and I broke at those words. I threw my head back and out the most pained and broken cry I have ever heard from my own lips. I have cried a hundred times. I have cried in pain, in longing, in self-hatred, and have even cried in pleasure. Somehow, all my tears have been about Katsuki.

The pleasure was the most recent, but now, it's pain. Gut-wrenching pain. I wailed into the silence around us on some lone country road in the middle of nowhere.

I would normally curl into myself when I cried. I tried to make myself smaller to hide away from the things around me, or inside me, that brought the pain. Only this time, I reached out. I clawed at the seats in front of me and grasped at anything I could hold onto. Mina held my arm tightly and buried her face into my shoulder as I sobbed. Her body shook, whether it was from my own tremors or her tears, I didn't know.

The water continued to fall and Shinso placed a gentle hand on my head. He held it there while I shattered for the dozenth time. I was tired of breaking. I was tired of crying. I didn't want to hurt those around me anymore.

So, I forced myself to stop crying and held back the pained cried from leaving my lips. My throat closed up and all that was let out were small hiccups and pained moans. Shinso stroked through my hair while Mina crooned softly for me. They were trying, I know they were. But I didn't care.

I clutched to my neck, feeling the ridged indents of Katsuki's teeth. I probed at the marks and bruises that littered down to my collar bone. The dull pain from my sore skin was comforting. It was proof that I had my mate for just a moment. It was proof that I belonged to him in some insignificant way and helped to calm my heartbeat. It soothed me until I felt exhaustion catching up to me and Mina had gently laid me in the back seat before the car rumbled back to life. I closed my eyes and pressed my palm to my neck. My gland was swollen still from my heat and the constant attacks from my mate, but I didn't care.

I could still inhale deeply and catch the mingled scent my body produced now. I smelt of Katsuki and my own pheromones. I smelt as if I were mated and marked, and I would hold onto that false hope for a bit longer -- just a bit longer -- please.

Chapter Text

𝓘𝔃𝓾𝓴𝓾 𝓜𝓲𝓭𝓸𝓻𝓲𝔂𝓪

 

I woke up much more comfortable than I had expected to be.

I was not in a car anymore, that's for sure, and the scent around me was different but vaguely familiar. I blinked my eyes a few times, attempting to clear the sleep from them and looked around more. When I sat up in the bed and pulled the covers up over my torso, I sniffed the air. I could smell Alpha pheromones everywhere. I could smell Mina and Shinso, but there was someone else in the background as well.

How long had I been asleep? Deciding that it would be better to get up and just find my friends rather than sit in a stranger's bed confused, I slipped out of the sheets and padded my way through the house. It was quiet and obviously late at night. The windows were practically black with the outside darkness and all the lights in the house were shut off. I stumbled into the living room and blinked while trying to adjust my eyes as I was hit with Mina's scent.

"Mina?" I whispered as I spotted her sleeping form on the sofa. I was honestly confused and had no idea where they had brought me. This wasn't my apartment and yet the strange scent that swarmed the whole house seemed familiar but distant. Mina yawned and sat up slowly. I stood there until she blinked up at me and gasped.

"Shit, Izuku. You scared me," She hissed out and placed a hand over her chest. I rolled my eyes, still angry at her from earlier but I was too tired to fight about it. My hand instinctively went up to cover my neck and I rubbed the spot gently.

"Where are we?" I asked and Mina gestured to the sofa but I shook my head. I didn't want to be near her right now. Not after she tried to forcibly remove Katsuki's scent from me. Her and Shinso both could fuck off for a while. I just wanted to enjoy my bliss a bit longer and I knew they just wanted to help me. But I didn't want it. Not right now.

"Don't freak out," Mina sighed and I raised a brow in her direction. I couldn't care less to be honest. I was just done with all this and wanted it to be over. I knew that I had barely planned this beforehand and just let Mina and Shinso decide what to do. I didn't want Katsuki to be able to find me. So, I guessed not going back to my apartment was the only way to ensure that. I briefly wondered where my phone was but Mina coughed and brought my attention back to her.

"I don't care where I am, I knew you guys wouldn't bring me back to my apartment." I shrugged and flopped down on the sofa on the far end from her and Mina sighed.

"We're in Canada." I blinked at her and furrowed my brow for a moment. Canada? Why would they bring me to Canada?

For a moment, the thought didn't sit well with me -- being so far away from Katsuki. But I knew I had to get over that feeling. It wasn't something that I needed to dwell on and being in an entirely different area, an entirely different country, was probably going to be the best way to go about doing that. It shouldn't have mattered anyway where I went. Not when I was never going to have my mate by my side anymore. Not when things were going to fully end. Slowly, I began to relax again and shrugged at what she said to me.

"Okay -- Canada -- Alright -- So, who's house is this?" I didn't think any of my friends lived in Canada but Canada was pretty close to where I had been before. Only a few hours away from the state I had been living in. Mina looked shocked that I was taking it so well, but I honestly just didn't care.

The pain in my chest was throbbing and all I wanted to do was go back to sleep. Maybe the lull of sleep would help to ease the aching in my heart that I was just tired of feeling? I knew that my scent mark would be fading within the next week and it would make the pain worse. I was tired of feeling that unrelenting pain, that never-ending suffering, and it was my fault. I didn't have an Alpha that could scent me anymore now that Shinso found his mate. So, I was entirely alone and being forced to accept the cruel reality of my situation.

"Well, that's what I wanted to talk to you about. Are you sure you don't want to talk about this in the morning?" Mina pulled the blanket around her shoulders and shifted her body to face mine.

"I don't care either way. Just tell me so I can go back to bed." I sighed and leaned into the warm sofa while Mina studied me carefully. Why should any of it matter anymore? I just needed a place to stay, somewhere where I could finally learn to breathe again. I just needed to sleep but there was no way my mind would be able to drift away if I had so many questions still soaring through it.

"I called your friend Shoto Todoroki from high school." My eyes widened some. Shoto? The same Shoto I had a crush on when I was like -- sixteen?

"I remember you telling me about him a while ago. You said something about how he was an Alpha and that just stuck. I -- well, I found him online and saw that he lived nearby." I stared at her in shock. I knew Mina was a bit crazy, but this was a little much.

"He hasn't found his mate yet and has been living alone for a while. I told him what was going on and he agreed to let you stay here and -- and that he'd be willing to scent you." I growled. The very thought of having another Alpha come into my life for the sole purpose of scenting me, when I barely had Katsuki's scent still lingering in the air, made my skin crawl. I had enough of jumping around. It shouldn't have been anyone's responsibility, and I just wanted Katsuki. However, I knew there was no way it was going to happen and it didn't ease the sense of betrayal that formed in the pit of my stomach.

"Mina," I warned and felt myself become angry with her doing everything behind my back like this. I did give them free rein with my situation though, so I couldn't be too angry with her. She sighed and shook her head but held her hands up in defense.

"You need an Alpha to keep you fucking alive, Izuku! If you keep going down this path, sooner or later, your heats are going to kill you. I've seen it for the past four years. Shinso and I both watched you. We saw. I can't just sit back and watch my friend wither away and die before my very eyes anymore. I had to do something. You wanted to leave, and well, now you're gone. But Shinso and I can't scent you as you need. If you want to break the bond with your mate then you need to be alive and healthy!" She scolded and I flinched back at her tone.

She was right. She's always fucking right. I just didn't want to think about it right now. I didn't want to think about having another Alpha, someone other than Katsuki. But -- but I needed one, didn't I? I needed an Alpha to help me during my heats if I wanted to get better, if I wanted to survive. It wouldn't be my mate. But he was an Alpha. He would keep me alive.

"Fuck," I whimpered and shook my head.

My limbs began to tremble at the mere thought of the future that was going to come for me. The path of betrayal that I was being forced to walk. It was littered with nothing but crushed rose petals that would crumble beneath my feet; never having the chance to redeem themselves and live the life of beauty they once experienced. That was what awaited me. A life of crushed hopes and dreams after the thorns tore into my soul as I ripped my string of fate apart.

Mina sighed and placed a hand on my leg but I quickly shook her off. I wasn't going to forgive her just yet for trying to take away the last moments of bittersweet comfort that I shared with my mate. The Alpha seemed to get my distaste for her comfort at the moment and retracted her hand. It hurt to see her retreat like that, but I needed her to understand that I wanted my space for now.

"Shoto sounded shocked to hear about you, but he still remembered your friendship from back in high school. I didn't actually tell him everything, though! I figured I could leave that up to you, because I wasn't wanting to divulge your personal information without you actually knowing I had done so. I just kind of told him that you were having severe problems with your mate to the point that you were planning on breaking the bond between you two. Shoto said that you both were close back then and that he would hate to see you hurt any more than what it sounded like you already were. So, he agreed with helping us out and said that we could definitely bring you here whenever you decided to leave Katsuki." Mina rushed her words out while I sat there shocked.

I had not seen Shoto in years and I wasn't sure what to expect when we met again. Would he even be the same person that I used to know? I had a crush on him back in high school and we didn't really date or anything of that sort. But, we went out a few times together only for it to never progress further. Soon, I had to leave for college and ended up cutting ties with many of my high school friends. We just stopped keeping in contact as the years went by and our relationships drifted apart. Shoto managed to check up on me a few times after the incident with Katsuki but once I moved away, all of that came to an end.

"Goddess," I groaned and put my face into my hands. I was going to have to explain what was going on to him now and that would be so embarrassing. Mina didn't say anything else while I sat there and absorbed all the information.

I was in Canada.

I was going to be living with Shoto in Canada.

He was going to be my replacement Alpha until I broke my bond with Katsuki -- in Canada!

Fuck.

"Where's my phone?" I whispered, suddenly wanting to check and see if Katsuki had messaged or called after waking up alone. I had the urge to explain myself; the urge to tell him that I was sorry for doing what I did, only to leave him behind. I didn't want him to feel used for it all, but that's exactly what happened.

I used him and then tossed him aside, something that I had feared I would do my whole life. I was repulsed with myself for touching him, embracing him -- loving him.

But, I needed to feel his lips on my lips, his hands holding mine, his breath mingling between us. I needed it, just once, before I let it all slip away forever. I used him for my own selfish desires, and now he was most likely waking up to an empty nest. A nest that had once been warmed by our coupling.

Had he woken up yet? How long had I been asleep?

"How long was I out?" I asked quietly and Mina sighed.

"You've been asleep for almost 12 hours. We got here a few hours ago and put you to bed. You were exhausted so we let you rest." Mina seemed hesitant with her response, like she was holding something back from me. Hiding something. So I asked her again where my phone was. She exhaled and I curled my lip up at her.

"Where is it?" I grit out through my teeth trying to hold back my anger. Mina flinched at the sudden venom that laced my voice and she dug in her pocket to finally hand me my cell phone.

"H - He called a few times but I didn't answer, so he left some voicemails. There are a few texts as well, but I swear I didn't read them." She tensed while I turned on the screen of my phone. When the light of my screen illuminated the room, I was met with a bunch of notifications. There were just too many to count right now and nearly every one I glanced at was from the Alpha that I had left behind.

I stood up slowly while ignoring Mina's questioning glances and began walking back to my -- well, Shoto's -- room. I had no idea what Katsuki would be saying in the torrent of messages that he had sent my way, and I wanted to be alone to read them in peace. I wanted to be able to feel the emotion that I was sure to find behind his words. How could someone like me just up and leave him like I had? It wasn't right, by any means, after how he cared for me during my heat.

I was sure he would tell me that there was no meaning behind what we did. He was most likely going to reject the thought that there was more to my feelings than the mate pull that bound us together. If that was so, then I needed to be alone. I needed to let my thoughts whirl around his words and maybe, somewhere along the lines, I would find the strength I needed to finally let him go.

I entered the bedroom again and finally let the scent register. The room was heavy with Shoto's pheromones. He smelled strongly of cinnamon and it wasn't unpleasant, but it wasn't Katsuki. I shook my head and rolled my shoulders in discomfort from the aroma that surrounded me.

I needed to get over Katsuki. I needed to move on. I knew that dwelling on everything would hold me back and at that rate, I would never be able to heal. So, with a heavy sigh to relieve the weight that was resting on my chest, I flopped onto Shoto's bed and slipped back under the covers. I pulled my phone in front of my face and groaned while clicking on the first text message.

(532) - 258 - xxxx: Izuku, where did you go?

(532) - 258 - xxxx: Seriously, where are you?

(532) - 258 - xxxx: What the fuck? Answer me now.

(532) - 258 - xxxx: This shit isn't funny, Izuku. I can't find you anywhere. Answer your damn phone!

(532) - 258 - xxxx: I called Inko, she said she doesn't know where you are either.

(532) - 258 - xxxx: I'm going to Inko's. It's too damn early to be running all around looking for your dumb ass.

Mom: Izu, sweetie? Why is Katsuki at my door?

Mom: Izuku? He's said you're missing? Where did you go? It's okay, I know that you left for a reason. I promise I won't tell him if you don't want him to know.

My hands had begun to shake while scrolling through the messages. There were more, but my eyes focused in on the voicemail notification and my heart shuddered in my chest. I hesitated over the icon before my curiosity got the best of me. I wanted to hear his voice even if he was going to yell. He had every right to scream at me, but I just wanted to hear him.

Voicemail 001: Izuku --- We need to talk about what happened. So, can you please answer the phone? I can't just talk to you through a speaker like this. We need to figure this out. So, call me back. Immediately.

I inhaled sharply before replaying the message and holding the phone to my ear. Why did he sound so desperate to hear back from me? He sounded worried, hurt even. But I couldn't understand why. Unless it was still his instincts talking. We had just mated and now his Omega was gone.

I pried the phone from my ear and went back to his many texts.

(532) - 258 - xxxx: Izuku. If you're upset with something I did, just tell me. You can't just fuckin' disapear in the middle of the night without telling anyone.

(532) - 258 - xxxx: For fuck's sake, Izuku! Stop playing around and call me.

Voicemail 002: Fuck, I know you're probably confused about everything, but that's okay. I can explain it all if you just talk with me. It doesn't have to be this way, Izuku. Just -- fucking call me back,okay?

Voicemail 003: I swear to god, Izuku. If you don't let me know where you are --- Fuck! --- When I find you I'm gonna -- Goddammit -- Inko said you didn't even tell her where you ran off to, fucking Omega! What's with you and running away?!

Voicemail 004: Why do you keep just leaving me behind like this? I thought I had a damn month. You lied to me. Bring me my fucking month back. You owe me, dammit. A deal is a deal, you can't just quit it halfway through.

Voicemail 005: -- Izu -- I just -- Shit, Izuku -- I don't understand.

His voice cracked through the entire message and I hadn't realized how badly my hands were shaking until my phone slipped from my fingers. It landed in my lap and I flinched back, the light from the screen cast shadows around the room and I took a shaky breath.

"F - Fuck," I whimpered to no one and gripped at the fabric over my chest. I let the tears stream freely while I stared blankly across the room. I didn't need to listen to this anymore. I didn't need to beat myself up. Katsuki was upset, of course he would be. I used him and left. I touched him and left. I -- I hurt him -- and left.

My hands shook while I carefully picked up my phone. I hesitated over the icon. But, I needed to do it. My hesitation had to end at some point. I had fucked up and there was no going back. I knew that what I was doing would backfire on me but the sound of Katsuki's distress over something I had done to him had my heart cracking behind my ribs. I couldn't handle hearing it anymore. I couldn't take the pain I was causing him. That's all I ever did to Katsuki and it needed to end. I wasn't healthy for him if all I did was leave a trail of agony in my wake.

I stared at his contact while tears dripped onto the screen. Every cell in my body screamed at me to press the little green icon and call him, to answer his pleas and hear what he had to say to me. I hovered there and choked over my broken sobs. They raked through my body and tore through my chest; sending uncontrollable tremors through my limbs. But I had had enough. I had to stop crying. I had to pull myself together and stop being so pathetic. I had to stop being the 'me' of my past and bring my tears to an end. That's all I ever did anymore -- cry -- and I was tired of it.

Moving my finger, I tapped the icon that I needed and watched as the screen changed and Katsuki's texts vanished.

--You successfully blocked (532) - 258 - xxxx--

Chapter Text

𝓘𝔃𝓾𝓴𝓾 𝓜𝓲𝓭𝓸𝓻𝓲𝔂𝓪

It was strange -- sleeping in another man's bed.

Especially after spending the past two and a half weeks surrounded by Katsuki's scent. Even if we didn't share a bed while I was with him, we had shared a nest over my five-day heat cycle and I had grown accustomed to waking up with the smell of burnt sugar. What little I did remember of the nights I slept beside the blond Alpha were blissful memories. However, now they seemed to bring shame to me as I woke up tangled in another Alpha's bedsheets.

It wasn't the scent of another Alpha that had woken me up; it was the throbbing in my lower back and hips that pulled me from my dreams. It reminded me of my situation and my mind spoke to me all the things that I should be ashamed of. I wished I could blame sleeping with Katsuki on my heat. I wished I could have brushed it off as an instinct-based need or the fact that my Omegan nature was pushing me to submit, but that would have been a lie.

I slept with Katsuki because I was selfish.

I let him mate me because I knew my plan to leave and I had wanted to give myself to him. Even if he didn't know it, he would have had all of me -- even the parts of me the Alpha never asked for. It was selfish of me and I wanted to regret my actions, but I didn't. I couldn't regret them. I had needed to give myself to him. I had to, so I could move on knowing I had loved him. Even if it was only for a moment. I had loved him and I didn't regret that.

Waking up brought back my reality. I had fallen asleep last night after reading and listening to all Katsuki's messages. It had thrown me deeper into the self-deprecative state that I had been in lately but I knew that I had made the right choice by leaving. Even if it hurt at the time -- and it did hurt so goddamn much leaving him behind.

I felt as if my skin were on fire while listening to my mate's broken voice over the phone. Katsuki was worried but I wouldn't give myself the satisfaction of looking deeper into his concern. The Alpha wasn't my concern anymore and I wasn't his. He did not have to let me ruin his life anymore.

It hurt more than anything to leave him for a second time. His pleas over the phone when asking me 'why I always left him' had gotten to me last night. It had cut me deeper than when I left him four years ago. I did the same thing to him back then when I had run away from our situation. Only this time I took something from him. I didn't accidentally touch him this time. I had sex with Katsuki.

It was mutual.

Consensual.

Nothing like what had happened when I was eighteen. But this time, I took something from him -- I took his first time. I had given him my body. He mated with me willingly and strengthened our bond by doing so. But I had left him behind and that is where my mistakes were born. I just hope that by leaving this time he would move on and forget about me. That's what I would be trying to do as well.

I wouldn't forgive myself for the emotional and physical pain I knew my actions would be causing him. I knew he would be in pain because of my sudden departure. I knew he would because it caused such a roaring pain within my core the moment I got into the fucking car with Mina and Shino. I could feel the strain on our bond already and I was thankful that he had been asleep at the time of my escape.

However, I knew that the moment he woke up he would be feeling the pain and panic of my disappearance, and he was. I could hear it in his voice over the phone. But he would be fine; he had done it before and come out of it fine. Only this time I would come out stronger as well. I wouldn't let this break me. I would get my life together and move on and at the same time, I would be giving Katsuki the one thing he always wanted; to be free from me.

***

The moment I entered the room I was greeted by both Mina and Shinso who were perched on wooden chairs at the dining room table. They were chatting to themselves but my focus was shifted to the Alpha who stood hovering over the stove. His back faced in my direction didn't hinder me from instantly recognizing who this man was. I remembered Shoto's signature red and white hair; it was one of the things that had attracted me to him back in high school. I I had been a sucker for the aesthetic he gave off. The Alpha's look screamed 'loud' but his overall personality was more docile and calm than expected from his style alone.

Mina stopped her conversation and looked up at me with a smile that I didn't return. I wasn't in the mood for pleasantries and just wanted to get this awkward situation over with. Mina told me that she had spoken to Shoto about my situation but hadn't told him everything.

Just how much had he been told of my personal life?

Shinso gave me a small wave and pointed to the seat next to him but I had other plans. Shoto had looked back over his shoulder at me but didn't smile. Good. At least someone didn't expect me to be happy right now.

I gave him a small appreciative glance before walking over and sticking my hand out. Shoto glanced at my hand before setting down whatever he was slaving over by the stove. He turned to me and placed his hand inside my palm while giving me a gentle smile. I had to force myself not to recoil. It wasn't that his touch disgusted me; I was on edge. There were too many Alphas in one room and I could smell all of them worrying over me.

"It's good to see you again, Izuku." Shoto shook my hand awkwardly and I nodded. The atmosphere was tense and I could feel Mina and Shinso staring at me. I pulled my hand from the Alpha's and stepped back.

"Hey," I rubbed my arm and watched the Alpha in front of me. His heterochromatic eyes still held my attention just as he had in grade school. Only now, his features have changed. He was no longer the teenager I had gone to school with. Shoto was taller, more mature, and adult-like than I had remembered. His scent was stronger now as well but it wasn't overwhelming like Katsuki's.

A slash of pain cut through me as I caught the heavy scent of Katsuki still lingering in my system. It reminded me of my most recent mistake. His scent was mingled with mine from our coupling and now my whole body burned for more.

"How did you sleep?" He spoke cautiously as if I would break if he asked the wrong question. Shoto gave a wry smile and I shook my head. I wasn't in the mood to pussyfoot around the subject any longer than I had to. Last night I didn't want to talk about what was going on. I didn't want Katsuki's scent removed from my body. But now, I wanted it gone. It hurt the longer I let it sit on my skin. The fade of his scent would only cause me to start spirling again.

"Fine, thank you." I tried to smile at him, to show my gratitude for his hospitality, but my face twisted and I knew it looked fake. Mina coughed from the dining room table and Shoto gave me a gentle smile before turning back to the stove.

"How do you like your eggs?" Shoto asked and I stared at his back for a few seconds before mumbling a quiet 'scrambled' under my breath. He chuckled and I quickly walked over to my friends and took a seat between the two Alphas.

"He's really nice," Mina whispered to me and I nodded absentmindedly. Shoto had always been kind to me. He wasn't a pushover by any means, but the Alpha was kind and protective of his friends. Most of our classmates didn't take the time to get to know him as I did. Because of that, they never got to see the softer side of Shoto Todoroki. It was a wonderful thing to witness from the normally shut-off Alpha.

"Mhm," I hummed and looked down at my lap while Shinso typed away at his phone. He had met his mate, and because of me, he had all but rejected Denki. I was surprised at how well Shin had handled the situation. Emotions were running high between us all, yet he remained relatively calm. I was glad he took my side then. But now, it hurt knowing that he even had to choose between his mate and his friend.

Mina would always stand up for me. We met during our freshman year of college and she had stuck by my side. Uraraka found a job in another city as we rarely got to meet up because of our schedules. My work had been slacking as well. I had pushed it aside to focus on Katsuki and let my career dwindle during those few weeks. I probably needed to crack open my laptop and get back to work. Just because I worked from home didn't mean I could slack off. I had taken vacation time, but that was long over with now and I had clients that needed me to get back to editing.

A plate of food was set gently in front of me and I blinked at the steaming dish of eggs, toast, and fruit. It was simple food and it made me smile a bit at the kind offer from the Alpha. It also sent a sharp pain through my gut at the familiar platter. Katsuki had made the same breakfast for me during my heat. He was a young Alpha but still knew what kinds of foods would be better for my stomach during heat cycles. I guessed Shoto was a more experienced Alpha and would know how to take care of me better than Katsuki had. My brow furrowed at the memories.

I must have been staring at the plate for a while, because soon, Shoto was sitting next to me and carefully placed his hand on my shoulder. I jumped out of my daze and snapped my head over towards him. The Alpha was smiling softly and heat rose up my neck as he removed his hand from my shoulder.

"Sorry," I mumbled and turned my focus back to the food he had provided for me. Mina was watching me carefully. Shinso seemed to notice my discomfort and kept his gaze off me. I was grateful for that.

"Don't apologize," Shoto shook his head but averted his eyes for my comfort, going back to eating his breakfast. There were plates of food in front of Mina and Shino already.

Had I been zoned out for that long?

I completely missed a good few minutes of what was happening around me. Picking up my fork, I stabbed at the eggs roughly in between shoveling the perfectly seasoned food past my lips and moaned quietly. Shoto chuckled beside me and I flushed a deep shade of pink.

"Glad you like it," He cooed and I nodded but glanced at Mina who was smiling softly at me. I didn't want the Alpha to think I was ungrateful, but I hadn't seen him in years. I never had problems with him and I had no reason to be worried. There was just too much worried Alpha stench wafting through the air.

Shinso was the first to break the tension. He put his phone away and cleared his throat.

"I think we should discuss this before we just leave Izuku alone with you. I mean, you seem trustworthy and Izuku doesn't look uncomfortable around you, but he's an Omega and you're an Alpha that we don't know. I'm not accusing you of having any motives -- it's just --" Shoto held his hands up in surrender.

"You care about your friend. I understand that and will answer any questions for you. I know it must have been strange for me to accept this so quickly, but you don't understand. Izuku was my first friend when I moved to America in grade school. He was kind when the others ostracized me. When he disappeared from all of our lives after graduation, I was worried. I tried to contact him but he changed his number." Guilt flooded me and I hung my head.

Shoto was really one of my best friends back in high school and I hurt him too by my stupid mistakes. Waves of shame rolled off my body and seeped from my glands. I was pathetic and hurt everyone in my life. Was one Omega really worth all this? They didn't have to help me. After all, what did they get from this friendship? All they did was worry over me.

"Hey," Shoto cooed gently and his hand landed on my nape, squeezing it gently. It forced my body to relax. A soft gasp parted my lips and my eyelids drooped from the sensation that rushed through me. My body relaxed with unfamiliar comfort. The Alpha knew what would calm me down better than I did myself. He must have been more experienced with Omegas than I had expected but I wasn't afraid. He seemed to know what my Omegan nature was craving. However, Mina tensed up and growled lowly at his open display of dominance over me. But I didn't care. I needed that from him and Shoto knew it.

"It's fine," I waved her off and Shoto rubbed my nape gently before pulling his hand away. I wanted to be embarrassed but I wasn't. It felt nice and my body was more relaxed now after his display. Mina still glared but I shook my head at her.

"Seriously, it's fine." I sat up and waited for the conversation to continue. The new Alpha sighed heavily but smiled softly.

"When Mina contacted me, I was shocked. I thought you had died, Izuku. I thought the worse when no one could get in contact with you. When Mina told me you were okay -- well, as okay as I assume you could be in such a situation -- I was relieved. So, of course, I would help you out when I heard you needed somewhere to go. It was a no-brainer, really. You have given me so much by being a good friend when I had desperately needed one. Think of this as my thank you. I just want you to be happy and healthy again. I will gladly sacrifice some free time to catch up with you if it helps you get to a better place. I know what it's like to have someone that's supposed to love you unconditionally, become someone who causes unbearable pain." The Alpha spoke lowly but held a gentle passion in his eyes that I admired. I smiled thankfully at him and placed my hand over his that rested on his thigh.

I knew Shoto's history. His father had always been cruel to him and made the poor boy believe he was a failure as an Alpha. He was never the strong and brazen Alpha his father had wanted him to be. He was a book worm, quite boyish and snarky when he was younger. He spent his days reading, playing soccer with his friends, and flirting with Omegas like me. His father wanted so badly for Shoto to take over the family business, to be his replacement, to turn cold and unforgiving to the outside world.

But the Alpha wanted to go to college and become a professor. His father didn't like that. Shoto's father pushed him out of the family and showed little affection to the Alpha after he graduated and went off to study history.

However, Shoto grew up and was still here holding a gentle smile. He was willing to help me when I abandoned him and scared him with my absence.

I was lucky.

Lucky to have such great friends that were willing to help me. Lucky to have them stick around after I caused them nothing but heartache and worry. I was lucky to have a family. Lucky to have my mother in my life and for her to love me so much.

Shoto didn't have that type of luck and he was still here -- ready to help me -- as if I never turned my back on him. I didn't deserve him. I didn't' deserve any of them. Still, I was lucky.

Chapter Text

𝓘𝔃𝓾𝓴𝓾 𝓜𝓲𝓭𝓸𝓻𝓲𝔂𝓪

Mina and Shinso both voiced their concerns about leaving me here alone with the Alpha, but Shoto eased their qualms quickly. He told them of his intentions with helping me through this and it helped us all feel a bit more comfortable with this arrangement. His intentions were pure.

Shoto was mature, my age, and someone I had once been comfortable with. The Alpha was a good match for what I needed. I would be going through the withdraw of being away from my mate. I would feel the pain and my instincts would start acting up again. It happened before and would happen again. Only now, it would be worse considering I let Katsuki knot me and his scent had been mingled with mine.

I wouldn't handle this well alone. I needed an Alpha to get me through this. Shoto knew what this would be. The Alpha would have to scent me, calm my instincts, and help me through my heats. I would have to bond with him. Shoto would not replace my mate bond, but Omegas needed to create some type of bond with whatever Alpha was caring for them. I would want it. I would want to have a better connection with Shoto once he began to take over the role of my Alpha. It would happen, I just needed to prepare myself for it. It's just biology. Nature. Instincts.

What Shoto didn't know was that I had been on suppressants for almost four years. He didn't know what I had practically given my reproductive system chemical burns from all the pills and hormones I pumped into me.

I ate suppressants like skittles and it was a well-known fact that my body would begin to go haywire the longer I was off them. My system would be trying to regulate to being off the hormones. It wasn't known what could happen, but I had assumed it would affect my heats. Clearly, it had. I had been off the pills for a month and I had already gone into heat early. My hormones were utterly fucked now and I doubted Shoto was prepared for that.

"I need to talk to you about something," Mina and Shinso had left yesterday after Shoto eased their worried minds. They knew that if Katsuki contacted them, to just tell him I was alive and well, but I didn't want to be found.

I called my mother as well. She wasn't happy that I left without saying goodbye. She was worried and told me that my mate had come by asking for me. However, I made it clear that I did not want him to find me and that if he asked, I didn't want her to tell him my location. I wasn't in the mood to chat for long, so I left it at that. My mother agreed and - like always - told me she loved me and would always be there for me.

"Sure," Shoto nodded towards the kitchen and pulled out a chair for me at the dining room table. I took a seat and folded my hands over one another on top of the table. The Alpha looked at me curiously as I began to fidget. I touched the smooth wood, running my fingers along the polished top nervously.

"I wanted to be upfront with you before -- before this gets too far," I kept my eyes cast down at the table while I continued to draw patterns on the wood. Shoto hummed and I could feel his eyes focused on me.

"I have been -- had been -- taking heat suppressants for a while and --" The Alpha growled causing me to tense up. I rarely witnessed such sounds from Shoto in the past and they had my arms breaking out in gooseflesh.

"How long have you been taking them?" Shoto asked once he had calmed himself enough to stop growling. He took a few breaths and relaxed while I calmed my body's reactions to his anger.

"Four years," I whispered and frowned when I saw his fists clenching in his lap. A low rumble from his chest had me biting my lip. It was a well-known fact that those pills were bad for Omegas. Shoto's old enough to have heard of what happens to Omegas that take them for too long. At the time, I didn't have a choice. I was to take the pills and have fewer heat cycles or deny the suppressants and suffer month after month of pain. My body would have shut down if I didn't do it. I didn't have a choice.

"Are you on them now? Christ, Izuku -- are you okay?" Shoto's concern was heartwarming, but it wasn't needed. I did this to myself. He didn't need to be sad for me.

"I stopped taking them a month ago because -- well -- I was going to be with Katsuki. I spent four years without him so -- It was either take them, or suffer." I frowned and the Alpha cursed under his breath. I didn't know if I was okay. I could only imagine how messed up my body was from them and I refused to go get looked at. It would hurt too much to hear the words that I feared would be said.

If I couldn't have children because of my decision to take the pills, I would be devastated. I wanted children, even if it wasn't with Katsuki.

"Good," Shoto breathed and I glanced at him. He gave me a small smile but I quickly looked away. There was more I had to say before I could let myself relax. I didn't want another person being brought into my chaotic life that had the option to leave before the storm hit.

"There's more," Shoto stated and I gave a slow nod. My fingers lazily traced the woodgrain patterns while he watched me.

"Yeah, there's more."

"Take your time," Shoto encouraged and I exhaled deeply. Why did he have to be so damn considerate? I wasn't used to the patient, understanding type of Alpha that Shoto was. As much as I was grateful, I was resentful of this perfect set up. It would be so easy to stay here with the Alpha and not look back. While I was comfortable here, my mate was out there getting over the fact that I had slept with him and then left.

"You seem to know enough about Omegas, so I doubt this will be hard to understand. I was on those pills for a long time and now that I am off, my system is all messed up. I went into heat last week when I wasn't supposed. My emotions are running wild as well. Until my body is completely regulated again I will be -- a handful? A lot to deal with, I guess. I want you to know that you don't have to do this. I can go home. I just felt you deserved to know what you're getting yourself into." I ran my fingertips along the wood and trailed off with my words. I wanted to go back to bed.

That's all I have wanted for the past two days but Mina, Shinso, and Shoto have all kept me up. Until Mina and Shin left last night. Shoto let me get some extra sleep but didn't force me to act as if I were happy.

"I don't have a lot of experience with Omegas, but I know enough about Omegan instincts and hormones around heats. It's likely you will have some rough days, but as long as you consent, I would happily help you."

"Like at the table the other day?" I had been getting upset, lost in my own head. The guilt had been eating me alive and Shoto picked up on it quickly. The little stunt he pulled with grabbing the back of my neck had been a very dominant move on his part. However, I hadn't felt unsafe or frightened. It was helpful.

"Umm -- Yeah, like at the table the other day. I didn't mean to upset you if I had." Shoto quickly added but I waved him off. I wasn't a child. I understood myself enough to know that I had to deal with things the other sub-genders didn't. The fact that I needed an Alpha presence in my life now that I am having heats didn't bother me. It was a part of my life that I had to endure.

"Don't worry about it. It's just how things are. I don't mind you taking charge like that. Things will be -- rough -- and I don't know how out of hand I might get. I got pretty depressed before. I got angry at another time. I lashed out. I don't want to hurt you or anyone else. Do what you must, I won't hold it against you." I wouldn't hold it against the Alpha for doing what he needed to keep me alive and safe. That would be stupid of me.

"I guess we should talk about something else," Shoto hummed and turned towards me. I felt the shift in his posture and turned to look at him as well. He did look a little nervous. Or was he uncomfortable? Whatever it was, it had my attention. The Alpha mused over what he was thinking about before he sighed heavily.

"I guess I should tell you to take your time as well?" I teased and watched as he chuckled with a soft shake of his head. I smiled down at my lap. It was nice to talk to someone and laugh again. Shoto had always been easy to talk to.

"Perhaps you're right," He cooed, reaching out to ruffle my hair. He always did that, and like always, I swatted his hand away with a whine of protest. Shoto only laughed again but pulled his hand back. "Still don't like that? What was your excuse back in high school? Ah yes -- you said it messed up your curls and you worked hard to style it before school." The Alpha tapped his chin as if thinking and I huffed while rolling my eyes.

"It did take forever! You were always messing it up though," I grumbled but couldn't help that ticked at the corner of my lips.

"I swore you took long enough to come out of the closet as well. With all the fussing over your hair you did, I'm surprised no one else called you out on it." Shoto teased still and this time I felt the heat running up my neck. It only made him laugh louder and my small smile turned into a full grin.

"I guess it was kind of funny," I agreed and Shoto pressed his hand over his mouth with a shake of his head.

"Damn right, it was funny," The Alpha chuckled and I rolled my eyes. When he got a hold of himself he grinned and relaxed into the chair. "I guess now is a bad time to ruin the light atmosphere, but I need to ask, Izuku." He began and my smile faded some but my body was still bubbling with the warm afterglow of the laugh we had shared.

"Go ahead," I prompted and Shoto pinched the hem of his shirt, nervously. I watched him tug at a loose string for a moment before I playfully nudged him. He jumped but gave me a smile.

"Come on," I rolled my eyes to tease him. He was too nervous over nothing. Hardly anything embarrassed me too much anymore. I had been naked in front of Mina and Shinso far too many times in the midst of my heats to be shy now.

"Okay, okay --" He chuckled and I smiled. "I was wondering what you planned for your heats? If you think they could be unpredictable then we need to discuss this beforehand. I really don't want to be caught off guard by your heat and I doubt you want me to be either. I want you to be safe here, not worried about anything if I can help it." Shoto was serious now, something that I rarely saw with him growing up. He was stonefaced with people he didn't know well, but not with me.

However, I knew the reason for the mask. He was nervous about the subject and it proved he was serious about my safety. I appreciated it.

I cleared my throat and thought about it for a moment. I had Shinso scent me before during my heats and it helped ease the pain some, but it never really lasted or eased the real ache inside. I had tried touching myself. Although that never really helped considering I was trying not to think about the underage Alpha at the time. I would be in that same boat this time. I didn't want to think about Katsuki during my heat. I wanted to move on. Heal.

I refused to be tied down with my own devotion to a man that wouldn't love me. Katsuki deserved to be happy. I loved him, so I would let him go. I wanted that.

I looked at Shoto and he was watching me curiously. Shoto meant no harm. He wanted to help me. I trusted him -- as much as I could knowing that I hadn't even seen the Alpha in over four years. But I did know him well back then and I knew he would look out for me. I never witnessed him cave to his instincts but I knew they were there. He was an Alpha male. They would show its ugly face if presented the opportunity. I just had to decide how much I was willing to give.

Was I okay with having him mate me during my heats if that meant I could survive this? Would I be okay having Katsuki flood my mind while Shoto is inside me? I frowned but shook my head to myself. Katsuki would always be in my mind. I would be betraying him. I knew this.

But I would live. I would get to move on. Katsuki would finally be happy, and I would be free. The pain would be gone and we both could start fresh.

Looking at Shoto, I sighed and gave a wry smile. He tilted his head but waited for me to say what I had taken so long to muse over. Thought, worries, and insecurities were still raging through my unsettled mind. But I knew what I had to do. I was okay with this. My life had flipped on its head so many times that, at this point, I couldn't care less. This was a new chapter in my life. I was used to fighting day by day just to survive. Only now, for another reason. My reason now was so that I could do what I always wanted to do -- make Katsuki happy and keep him safe.

"When my heat comes, feel free to mate with me. I don't mind if you do or don't, but I have tried almost everything else. I can't -- umm -- get myself off without thinking about him, and I can't just endure it alone anymore. I mated with him a few days ago and my instincts won't settle for less now. I want him out of my head and this is an option. I won't be mad; I will be grateful, Shoto. Just don't knot me --" I hung my head and clenched my jaw tight. I would leave that for Katsuki. Just one thing he had of me that no one else would.

Sex was just sex.

I already gave myself my Katsuki, so this would be fine. I didn't care anymore. Everything else was already so fucked up, my heart, my body, my love life, my friendships. It's all fucked up and my fault. Time to reap what you sew, Izuku. I looked up at the Alpha who was wearing a shocked expression. His eyes were wide as he watched me. I know Shoto would think this was some kind of joke, but it wasn't. I didn't care anymore.

There was no point in caring as long as I got healthy and my body regulated. I have been in pain since my eighteenth birthday and was ready to finally live. Whether that involved Katsuki or not -- and it did not.

"Yeah, just mate me whenever the time comes. You have my permission -- I'm done being in pain. I don't want to spend this next part of my life in pain. I want to get better. I don't want to hurt anymore--" It was true; everything hurt. I could feel the familiar sting of tears forming in my eyes but I blinked them away. I was done crying. I was done being in pain. I was done being controlled by stupid emotions.

I wanted to be okay again -- I just wanted to be okay.

Chapter Text

𝓘𝔃𝓾𝓴𝓾 𝓜𝓲𝓭𝓸𝓻𝓲𝔂𝓪

"S - Stop, Shoto!" I gasped while backing away. The Alpha couldn't hide the mischievous glint in his eyes or the grin that covered his face as he approached slowly. I had told him to cut it out once before, but he had been making a habit of ignoring my distaste for this type of behavior.

"How do you expect me to stop when you're making those faces?" He grinned while I backed up until I hit the kitchen counter. I had nowhere to run now and as the Alpha stalked towards me I began to feel my adrenaline kick in. I really hated it when he did this to me. I had been living with him for two weeks now and Shoto had begun doing this almost every night.

"Seriously, I - I don't like having to clean the mess afterward," I whined and watched him. My eyes widened when he chuckled and stepped closer. He really didn't care, did he? Shoto shook his head softly until he was standing right in front of me, caging me in with my back to the granite countertop. I had turned my head to the side to avoid his oncoming attack. The last thing I wanted was for it to get in my mouth again.

"You're no fun," The Alpha huffed but stepped back to give me some room. I felt him retreat so I turned my head to face him. But just as I moved back around, Shoto threw his hand out, pushing his icing coated fingers all over my face.

A loud and shockingly unmanly scream left my throat while he doubled over in laughter. Shoto gasped and bellowed out more of his loud belly laughs while I grumbled under my breath. He inhaled sharply before breaking into another fit of deep laughter while I stormed over to the sink to wash the thick sugar paste off my skin. I cursed lowly under my breath while he slowly calmed down.

"Damn, stupid man-child. You're always messing around like this," I muttered and turned just in time to see Shoto leaving the kitchen, still laughing with a satisfied grin on his face.

"This is why I don't let you help me cook!" I screamed in his direction as he walked away, only for me to hear more of his satisfied laughter as he retreats to the living room. So much for trying to be nice. I wanted to bake him a cake for his birthday tomorrow and that is how he repaid me? I wanted to be more angry with his childish acts, but it made me smile the more he let that part of him shine.

We both had fallen into a new routine of living together. The first week was the hardest without Katsuki. My scent was still changing, going back to normal after being mingled with his, and it was emotionally exhausting. However, after that first week, my scent had returned to normal and Shoto began scenting me every other day. It helped keep my emotions at bay and it was nice bonding for the Alpha and me.

Shoto had been great, honestly. We ate dinner together every night. He let me cook if I wanted to and on nights that I didn't feel like it, he would take over dinner duty. If we both were tired, he would take us out somewhere nice. I got back to my work as well and began feeling more like myself as the days passed. It was nice having some normalcy in my life again, even if Shoto was a bit of a tyrant sometimes.

I busied myself with the cake that had been cooling over the last hour. I couldn't do much for him considering he had almost everything he needed or wanted. He was a professor at a university now and made good money. I, however, stayed at home and worked from my laptop. It was a blessing that I worked from home now that I technically lived in Canada with Shoto. I had been furious at first with my friends for dropping me in another country unprepared. But turns out they had been prepared. They got my Visa worked out and everything. All I had to do was go with Shoto to the embassy within the first 72 hours of arriving and check in with the international affairs department.

As I iced the cake carefully with thick buttercream frosting that Shoto had so graciously dipped his fingers into already, I rolled my eyes with a fond smile. I covered the cake in the sugar paste before adding some multicolored confetti sprinkles on all sides. The dessert ended up looking delicious. It was coated in pastel-colored sprinkles and the vanilla cake smelt divine.

"Don't touch the cake until tomorrow afternoon, Shoto!" I called while covering the cake and placing it inside the refrigerator. Knowing him he would come to grab a fistful of the cake I had spent all afternoon slaving over if I didn't warn him away.

"Sure thing," Shoto came up behind me and looked into the fridge at the cake. I quickly shut the door and huffed.

"No peeking, okay?" I glared at him but smirked when he pouted .he nodded and turned to leave with that same dishearted look on his face. So, I did the one thing I could think of to even the playing field and turn his attitude around. I scraped my fingers inside the bowl that I had used to make the icing .there was just enough left to form a nice glob.

With less than a second of hesitation, I pounced in his direction with a huge grin plastered on my face. The Alpha heard my sudden speed and turned around at just the right moment to receive a loud frosting-covered smack in the face. I yelped at the force behind my attack but it didn't seem to bother Shoto. He looked stunned for a moment and I couldn't contain myself. His wide eyes and slightly parted lips that were covered in buttercream frosting had me doubling over and clutching at my stomach.

"That wasn't very nice, Izuku," Shoto said calmly and I sobered up quickly before peeking up at him again. He was grinning and I chuckled softly, realizing he wasn't mad.

"Oh?" I teased and watched as the Alpha licked some frosting off his lips with a chuckle.

"Yummy," He smirked and scooped a glob of the paste off his cheek before popping it in his mouth. I reached out quickly, smearing the icing all over his face just before Shoto could jump back with a low growl. My eyes widened as a series of laughs slipped past my lips. Shoto rumbled low in his chest and the Alpha lunged at me. I whirled around with a scream that turned into a laugh while sprinting out of the kitchen with an amused Alpha chasing after me.

***

"Are you done now?" Shoto huffed as he finished wiping his face clean of any leftover sugary concoction. He had chased me around the house until we were both out of breath. Neither one of us seemed to be in enough physical shape to keep the chase up. Although it was thrilling while it lasted. Having an Alpha chase you around tugged at our ancestor's instincts. The chase, as they called it back then, sparked our animalistic tendencies and had us both grinning from ear to ear as Shoto chased me around.

The chase only ended when Shoto had grabbed me after trapping me in a corner of the house. He had a huge smile on his face but his eyes were dark and dilated letting me know that his instincts were taking over.

I had been surprised when he threw me over his shoulder and tossed me onto the sofa. However, it only succeeded in making me bubble up with more laughter as he stalked off to wash up. Now he seemed back to normal and fully in control again.

"I don't know -- Are you done starting food fights every time I am using the kitchen?" I hummed while Shoto came out of the bathroom with a clean face. He smiled but rolled his eyes playfully.

"You're getting quite demanding, Omega; you know that?" He grinned and I just snorted. Shoto never called me an Omega. This was a first. I raised my brow at him, challengingly.

"Yeah, so what?" I had just got myself back to a point where I was not sulking over Katsuki all day. I felt good and liked that I was coming out of my depressive shell. Just because I am an Omega shouldn't mean that I can't joke around. Shoto came up to me and pushed his fingers through my hair, easing the tension that was rolling off me in waves.

"I didn't mean it like that," He smiled at me and I relaxed under his touch. His scent was relaxing even if it wasn't the one I craved. I huffed but smiled back as he tucked a loose curl behind my ear.

"I know," I mumbled and pushed him out of my way roughly but playfully as I brushed past him. Shoto grunted at my shove and followed behind me with a soft chuckle.

"Yep, super bossy, little Omega," He teased and I growled before whirling around on him. He stopped in his track before he could run into me and I laughed at his shocked expression.

"Did you growl at me?" He raised an eyebrow and I bit down on my lip to suppress any more laughter from escaping. I cocked my head to the side arrogantly and backed away slowly until I saw the spark of the chase in his eyes again.

"I did -- What are you going to do about it -- Alpha?" I drew my words out teasingly and grinned when his eyes dilated. Another surge of energy coursed my veins as Shoto growled lowly.

"Maybe I should go get the icing again," He smirked and my eyes widened. I hadn't put the mess in the kitchen up yet and Shoto knew it. I shook my head, really not wanting to get all sticky from the frosting -- again. However, the Alpha grinned and wiggled his fingers out at me.

"Better run, Omega." He cooed and lunged at me. I yelped when I couldn't dodge and he tossed me over this shoulder again. I was dangling over his back while he held my legs to his chest.

"P - Put me down!" I ordered but it landed on deaf ears as Shoto marched into his bedroom and threw me down on the mattress. I landed with a bounce and started laughing as Shoto stalked closer, crawling onto the springs. The mattress dipped under his weight and I stifled another laugh at the humor dancing in Shoto's eyes.

"I think you need to learn a lesson," Shoto grinned and grabbed my ankles. I squealed when he suddenly yanked my feet towards him until he was hovering over me with a wolfish grin.

"No - No, I don't!" I laughed and wiggled back some but Shoto only clicked his tongue while shaking his head at me.

"Yep, you definitely do. You're too sassy for your own good, mister." Shoto teased, his fingers digging their way into my sides and I let out a high pitch whine followed by unintelligent strings of complaints and laughter.

Shoto tickled me, skimming his fingers along my flesh until I was tearing up and writhing on the bed. I couldn't stop laughing and Shoto was chuckling as well while I thrashed around. I could have easily escaped if I really wanted him to get off. But I didn't. I was having fun for the first time in years. I was 23 years old and laughing like a teenager.

"Forfeit?" Shoto asked, his fingers taking a break from their attack. He rested his hands on my stomach and I panted heavily, still trying to catch my breath. My cheeks were hurting from smiling so much and Shoto's eyes danced with excitement. I was lucky to have met him back in high school.

He had been taking good care of me and helping me stay busy to keep Katsuki off my mind. Although it normally worked well, his distractions, some days I couldn't help but wish for Shoto's presence in my life to be replaced with Katsuki's.

I missed my mate, and though I was feeling better mentally, physically I could feel the pain within me from our separation. It was a deep nagging in my head from our separation.

It was a deep nagging in my core that told me something was wrong. However, Shoto masked it by scenting me and comforting me when I was feeling down. Moments like this make me wish it were Katsuki whom I was laughing and running around with.

Nonetheless, I was getting better. For once in a long time, I was feeling like myself. Before the mate drama and before I really discovered what pain was. I felt like a kid again, only a lot more emotional and tired that I had been in my early teens.

Katsuki still haunted my dreams, but I was glad to have Shoto. He was a good friend and cared for me on days when I didn't care for myself. Katsuki hadn't tried to contact me again after I blocked him. My mom told me that he called a few times but she told him what I had told her to say. I didn't want to be found. I was alive, but I didn't want to be found.

"You good?" Shoto whispered and I broke out of my thoughts only to find the Alpha still hovering over me, watching me with a concerned gaze. I blushed and nodded quickly. Shoto sighed and poked his fingers into my sides one last time before rolling off me. I squeaked at the jab and giggled softly.

"Thanks," I whispered to Shoto and he gave me a small smile that said everything would be alright. One that told me I didn't have to tell him what was really on my mind. He knew that I was not 'good' yet he never pressured me to talk about it. He gave me that soft smile that told me all I needed to know. I wasn't good. But, hopefully, one day I would be.

"Thanks," I whispered again before lying back on the bed in comfortable silence.

Chapter Text

𝓚𝓪𝓽𝓼𝓾𝓴𝓲 𝓑𝓪𝓴𝓾𝓰𝓸𝓾

"Inside -- I want you inside me," Izuku panted as he sprawled out under me. His fingers were trailing delicately over the panes of my stomach as I pushed my hands up his thighs and slipped my fingers over his member. He was so wet and it took everything in me to hold back and not absolutely wreck him like my instincts were calling me to. However, I wanted this too. It probably was not the best idea considering where our relationship stood at the time. But I had made my decision and knew that I wanted to make this work and he was my mate. It was fated that we end up together -- and fighting it was tiring. Being angry was exhausting.

Izuku whined pathetically as I teased my fingers over his body and I hummed. This was so fucking weird. I knew that my attraction towards him was beginning to drown out the hatred and anger, but this was a lot. I had never looked at this Omega and thought about bedding him before. Nevertheless, how could I say no when my mate was begging me so sweetly?

"If I take you now, I won't stop, Izuku. I don't want to hurt you," I mumbled soothingly to him as my eyes trail down his exposed body while I continue to palm over his cock. His body was fascinating and I had never seen anyone naked like this before. His Omegan frame was delicate and thin. His thin waist curved at his hips, giving him a figure that was hidden beneath his clothes the majority of the time.

I didn't want to hurt him. This was his first time, heat or no heat. This was my first time. I had always wanted to save this for my mate, and there could have been a better time for us to share this together, but now would work. I didn't feel too bad because I picked up on the fact that Izuku's heat was ending. The Omega was too coherent and aware of his actions -- still needy -- but coherent. He knew what he was doing -- he knew.

***

I shook my head and stared forward, locking eyes with my reflection in the bathroom mirror. When I had woken up in a disheveled nest and a missing mate, I felt a swarm of panic that I had never experienced before begin to flood my body. My instincts were screaming for me to find Izuku immediately and bring him back to his nest where he belonged. We had just mated, and being an Alpha instantly made me possessive of what belonged to me.

I smelled like Izuku still. It had been days since he left, and each day that passed, his scent faded. I ground my teeth as I stared at myself in the mirror. My eyes were dull and the bags under them were proof of my constant worry and sleepless nights. There had been no word from Izuku since he left. Even his mother refused to say anything. Inko only provided me with the small bit of information that my mate was alive -- and he didn't want to be found.

At first, I was scared. That morning when I made my way out of the nest and searched around for him in the house, I thought something had happened. Maybe he was overwhelmed? Maybe he wasn't ready for sex yet and he regretted letting his heat speak for him? However, I brushed some of my worries away because Izuku wasn't that lost in his heat. He knew what he was doing.

Then I was mad because he did know -- he knew what he was doing. That pissed me off and ripped parts of my heart out when I realized that Izuku did it again. He up and left me with no contact, no goodbye, and not a single word.

I slammed my fist down into the counter and ignored the deep throbbing in my knuckles as I stormed out of the bathroom. My mind conjured up unwanted memories of that night. I had not asked for what he did to me that night. I did not want him that way. He had violated me and I was unaware of the cause of his actions until recently. Heat or no heat, he still touched me -- and then left me.

Only now, I wanted him to touch me. I wanted to touch him. I liked touching him. I loved the way he clung to me and pressed his mouth to my shoulder as I moved inside him. I adored the sweet sounds he made when my fingers brushed his nipples. Or how we swallowed each other's moans through shared kisses. I wanted everything that happened that night -- and then he left -- again.

***

"Gods, Izuku --" I sighed heavily and sunk two fingers inside his waiting body. He was so wet and I growled in approval when his walls clenched down around my fingers. He tossed his head back with a silent cry as I curled upwards and flicked my fingers in the direction I had only assumed would be correct. I didn't know what I was doing -- but I had watched enough porn to understand the basics. I knew that if I shifted a little up and to the right --

"Ahh -- haa -- Katsuki, please," Found it. He cried out and my eyes widened as his hips rolled and lifted. My mouth watered as I watched him fuck himself on my fingers. It had to have been the most erotically beautiful thing I had ever witnessed. My mate's face was scrunched up in his pleasure while he rolled his hips and his thighs quivered. I held still and only flicked my fingers each time he pushed down on them. My mate -- I bit my lip and let him use me how he wanted. Who was I to deny my mate something he wanted? He had suffered enough.

***

I growled and buried my face in my hands while shaking my head to rid myself of the memories that kept playing in my head. I was searching for them, desperately trying to find where I went wrong. There must have been something that I did to set him off. I was gentle with him. I held him after and soothed him the best that I could have. Maybe I just was just a bad fuck and he ran? I scoffed and shook my head. No -- we were literally made for one another. I probably wasn't the best but I made him cum so it wasn't that.

"Asshole," I cursed under my breath and flopped down on my bed before turning my head to the side. Izuku's nest remained in the corner of my room. I wanted to take it apart but it held his scent -- sweet sugar, sweat, and sex. It proved that I had not dreamed that night up.

It was real.

The days passed by slowly and at first, I called Inko every day. I asked her for updates and if she heard from her son. I asked her to tell him that I was worried and I wanted to speak to him. I doubted that she passed my messages along, but at least I tried. After two weeks, I stopped calling. I stopped calling Izuku as well. The fucker blocked me. When I went to call him and it automatically would send me to voicemail, I quickly found out that he was not just ignoring my calls, but he had blocked my number.

I hurt -- and I was confused. I thought he wanted to be together. I thought that he wanted to win me over or some shit. Sure, I fucked up and wasn't the best to him, but he gave up on me. He left me.

Again.

I shut myself out from my friends. I refused to see Denki -- that asshole caused enough problems and he now has his own mate to go flirt with. Shinso -- The poor fucker took one look at Denki and almost rejected him for the shit he pulled with me and Izuku. I don't blame Shinso for his anger with Denki; I was too pissed at the blond Omega to even care. Denki tried to contact me, but I ignored him. It wasn't just him; I ignored everyone. Well, I tried to. Fuckin' Shitty Hair had a habit of breaking into my house at random hours of the night just to check in on me. I thought about putting bars on my damn windows to keep him out.

Kirishima broke in at least three nights a week to check on me, and although I wanted to snap his stupid neck each time, the stubborn man only managed to brush off my death threats and sit with me until I fell asleep. I hated to admit it, but Kirishima was probably my only real friend. I loved my friends, but he was the only one I actually felt I could talk to. But not this time. I didn't want to talk to anyone. It hurt. Each day Izuku was gone, his scent faded from my skin, his nest became stale, his memory started to fade, and my heart continued to break.

Kirishima tried to get me to talk to him but I didn't want to. I was confused. Ashamed. I didn't know what to talk about. I had fucked up somehow. This was no one's fault but my own.

Yet, somehow I wanted to blame Izuku. I had let myself be vulnerable with him. I trusted him, regardless of the fact that when I was a child I had nightmares of him assaulting me. I used to be terrified of new people and strangers -- because of him. I was anxious and untrusting for years after that.

However, I trusted him to touch me. I gave myself to him because I thought he wanted me. I was new to the idea of our relationship, but I had come to a crossroads and chose my new path. I was going to try. I wanted to try. I opened myself back up and let him seep his delicate hands into my heart once more, only for him to rip out another chunk and step on it as he left me for a second time.

It had been a month now, and I wanted to be worried for his safety -- but I was angry. I was so angry with him. It took a while to understand fully -- and I thought I was in denial for some time. I refused to believe my mate would do such a thing to me. I thought he wasn't capable of hurting me. Like all those years ago, when he hurt me -- touched me -- I thought it was an accident at first. Then I found out that he had been in heat, full-blown heat when he did those things to me. Yet this time, I knew for a fact he was in the right state of mind.

There was no accident.

He used me.

Izuku used me for whatever reason and then left me again. Was this his way of punishing me for being a dick to him when I tried to reject him? Was this his way of getting back at me? Sleep with me -- mate with me -- and then disappear from my life once more as if I no longer existed in his? As if I didn't mean anything to him? Did I mean anything to him?

I had done my fair share of crying, screaming, and sleeping off the pain. Now, I was numb. I was done with the pain. Izuku's scent no longer clung to my skin. His scent was gone from my house other than the nest in the corner of my room.

I stared at the pile of pillows and blankets -- left in the same condition as they were a month ago. I didn't need to live like this anymore. Maybe this was a good thing? There were too many things wrong with our mateship for us to work out in the end. Izuku was not who I had thought him to be. I didn't know him. He wasn't the same Izuku I knew in middle school. He wasn't the Izuku I had just come to accept as my mate. So, who was he? Why did I care when he so obviously didn't care about me?

I cursed under my breath and began grabbing random articles of my clothing, pillows, blankets, and any other item from his nest that I could fit in my grasp. I uprooted Izuku's nest from my floor as my instincts fought me the whole way. I was tired of seeing it. I was tired of being reminded that my mate used me. I was tired of remembering that I let myself be weak for him -- again -- and again he fucked me over.

I pulled apart the nest and shoved each item into a trash bag before toating it to the laundry room. I shoved them all into the wash and dumped detergent in before setting the machine to its maximum wash setting. I wanted his scent gone. I watched as the machine filled and the blankets were submerged underwater. I stood there for the entire 45 minutes as the items were cleaned and restored to their original state.

When they finished the cycle, I transferred them to the dryer after giving them a good sniff. Izuku's scent was washed away. There was no trace of him left and I smiled grimly before shoving them into the other machine to finish drying. It gave me an idea -- one that I tried several times before. It never worked, yet I came back to it every night.

I made my way to my bathroom and stripped my clothes before turning the shower on and standing under the cold spray. I shivered under the rain and waited as the water heated. My hands scrubbed at my body from head to toe, imagining that I was cleaning my skin from his touch. I wanted him gone from my body -- gone from my mind.

I clenched my eyes shut as I roughly scrubbed my skin raw for the longest time. My body grew tired and irritated the longer I stood under the hot water -- but still -- I stayed longer, hoping that one day one of these showers would somehow make me feel better. I hoped that one day I could clean his memories away and I would forget his touch. I didn't want to be angry anymore. I didn't, but I hurt.

However, today was not the day, and the longer I scrubbed, the more I wanted to scream. My insides burned and I leaned back into the cool tiles of the shower walls as water ran down my face and body. Unlike the fabrics of his nest, being underwater did not cleanse my memory. It did not wash away my guilt. It did not make me forget. I wanted to forget. I wanted to reject him. I really wanted to.

But I couldn't bring myself to say the words. I guessed that I was holding on to a sliver of hope that this was just a stupid misunderstanding, or that Izuku was abducted by aliens -- or ran away on a month-long spa retreat that -- for some fucking reason -- he had no cell service and just didn't tell anyone that he was going. I held onto those childish ideas. Izuku was my mate, and I wanted to believe that he wouldn't do this to me. I wanted to believe that he would have forgiven me for my actions and my cruel behavior towards him.

I leaned against the wall of the shower and ran my hands down my face. My skin was wet. From tears or from water? I didn't know. It didn't matter. I refused to let Izuku ruin me more than he has. I was tried. I tried to move past my anger towards him, but he fucked up. I know that I fucked up in the past -- but he -- he fucked up. He fucked up and I wanted to forget it all -- forget him. My body jerked as I held back a sob that was fighting its way up my throat. My hand slammed over my mouth as my body shook and trembled under the now-cold spray of water.

Fuck him. Fuck this. I wanted -- I wanted to forget. I wanted to forget. I wanted to fucking forget.

Chapter Text

𝓘𝔃𝓾𝓴𝓾 𝓜𝓲𝓭𝓸𝓻𝓲𝔂𝓪

Reclining on the sofa, I pressed my bare feet into Shoto's side searching for some warmth. It was always cold in Canada this time of year and I hated it. The Alpha had no problems with the cold, his body was some kind of space heater or something. Me, on the other hand, I was freezing unless I had covered myself from head to toe in layers of clothes or blankets.

"You should eat more, you're too thin. No wonder you're cold all the time," Shoto teased and I shoved my feet harder into his side in retaliation. He hissed and grabbed my ankles before yanking me towards him by my feet. I gasped and flailed my arms in shock at the fast movement but sighed in relief when the Alpha took my feet in his hands and rubbed them.

"Remind me to just shove my cold feet on you the next time I want a foot rub," I slurred as my head lulled back into the pillows on the sofa while Shoto chuckled and dug his thumbs into my heels.

"Don't get used to it," He scoffed and I felt my lips twitch. I had been living here with Shoto for a month now and things were settling nicely. For once, I found myself smiling and laughing. I slept at least a full 8 hours each night and even got a lot of work done.

It still hurt when I thought about Katsuki. My dreams liked to taunt me with him and I briefly wondered how long it would take for me to fully heal. I knew I was going to break out bond. How long would I have to wait to ensure I wouldn't hurt myself more or even die from the separation? I didn't know but I knew I had all the time in the world. Shoto was amazing and helped me through the rough nights.

My dreams loved to conjure up memories and scenarios. Some nights my dreams were amazing -- too amazing -- and I would wake up to bunched up sheets and sticky thighs. I jerked awake each night those dreams came and quickly ran to the nearest bathroom to wash away the evidence. I never had dreams like those before. I had always spent my time wallowing in pain and fighting my nature so hard that my dreams were blank unless they were nightmares.

Now, I was doing better. But a small part of me longed for my mate. I had Shoto and even though what we had was not romantic, it felt wrong being intimate with another man. Nothing had happened between the Alpha and me, but I knew my heat would be due soon, and that brought complications that I didn't think I was willing to deal with just yet.

I was told in school that mates would feel a betrayal in the bond when one mate was unfaithful to the other. I didn't know to what extent they meant when they said they could feel the betrayal, but just the thought alone of Katsuki knowing I was sleeping with someone else made me sick to my stomach.

I didn't want to betray him. Was it even a betrayal if Katsuki and I were never an item? I didn't think so, but the idea of him knowing brought me shame and nothing has even happened yet.

I could, however, feel my body preparing for my next heat. I was suddenly terrified at the idea of having my heat with Shoto rather than Katsuki. I thought that the Alpha could tell something was going on with me lately because I went to bed earlier and earlier each night. I took long showers, expecting my body and looking for the telltale signs of an oncoming heat.

Were my hips sore? Were my nipples more sensitive? Was I cramping yet? I was petrified. I spent almost four years of my life enduring heats by myself with only an Alpha scenting me. I kept getting sicker and sicker the longer I denied my body what it needed. If I wanted to get better -- I knew what I was going to have to do.

"You okay over there?" Shoto asked and I flinched out of my worrying. I looked down at my feet and watched as he rubbed over them softly. They were no longer cold that's for sure. The Alpha gently pushed my feet off his lap and I sat up on the sofa beside him. The movie we had been watching was long forgotten.

"I'm fine," I sighed and leaned my head back. I would be fine. Shoto didn't believe me for one second. He shifted on the cushions and turned his body to face mine.

"Izuku, you've been living here for a month now. I know when something is bothering you," He chided and I rolled my eyes with a smirk. I didn't need him scolding me. If I didn't want to talk to him then I didn't have to. I just shut my mouth and looked up at the ceiling fan. It was getting dark outside and my stomach twisted.

"I forgot to eat dinner," I stated and Shoto sighed.

"Alright, let's got make you something," He stood up and stretched his arms above his head. I peeked over and let my eyes slip down his torso where his shirt had ridden up. My face heated and I jerk my head to the side. What the fuck?

"Yeah," I choked out and followed him to the kitchen. Why was I suddenly checking him out? I hadn't checked him out like that since high school. However, he looked much different than he did in high school. He was taller now and filled out nicely, and his abs -- What the fuck? I shook my head and bit down on my lip as I tried to force away those images.

"We have leftover pizza?" Shoto offered while holding up the box of pizza we had for dinner last night. I nodded absently and flopped down on the barstool. I didn't care what I ate, my stomach was hurting anyway. I just needed something so I wouldn't get sick.

Shoto hummed and popped two slices onto a plate and into the microwave. I rubbed my stomach and sighed. The Alpha walked over to me and smiled before ruffling my hair. I smiled back at him but quickly looked away as my face warmed again.

"You're looking a little flushed," He mumbled and felt my forehead. "Are you feeling well?" He asked and I nodded. I was fine. I just needed to eat and go to bed. Somewhere in the back of my mind, I recognized these symptoms. However, I pushed them away and quickly ate my pizza and gulped down a glass of water.

Mumbling a quick 'goodnight' to my friend, I raced off to my bedroom and into the ensuite bathroom. I stripped off my clothes as the dull ache in my stomach continued to coil.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck," I chanted as I looked at myself in the mirror. My skin was flushed and hot to the touch and my hand quickly came up to my neck. I poked the nape of my neck and whimpered when I felt the swollen gland. This could not be happening. I just had a heat cycle last month. This was too soon. Heats only come once every three months. This wasn't right. Something was wrong. Something was wrong.

I stumbled over to the shower and flicked the water on cold. I knew how to calm myself. I did it for years. I could do it now. I knew I gave permission to Shoto a few weeks ago. I told him that he had every right to have sex with me if I went into heat. But I knew he didn't want to. He didn't want to take advantage of me like that.

However, I knew I would panic. That's why I told him he had my permission to do whatever he needed to get me under control. I knew I would fight him. He wasn't my mate. I didn't want him how I wanted Katsuki.

My knees wobbled as I stepped into the cold spray and I pressed my hands against the cool tiles to steady me. I wanted Katsuki. I whimpered, suddenly feeling extremely frightened at my situation. I should call someone -- I could call Katsuki.

I blinked as a soft mewl parted my lips at the idea of contacting my mate. My knees knocked together as I wobbled my way to the shower door. I could contact Katsuki. He would help me, right? My body trembled as I stepped out of the cold spray and my skin was lit on fire again without the help of the cold water. I gasped and clutched at the counter of the sink, knocking off my toothbrush and toiletries.

I looked into the mirror and whined when I saw myself. My eyes were dilated, lips plumped from biting, and my skin dripped water. Then there was -- below. I frowned as I looked down between my legs where my body was already demanding attention. I needed my mate. He helped me last time, he can help again.

I quickly stumbled into my bedroom, tracking water across the floor as I dug through my discarded jeans in search of my cell phone. There was a quick knock on the door and I startled, dropping my phone as soon as I picked it up.

"Hey, you okay? I heard a bunch of noise," Shoto spoke and I looked around. My scent wasn't emitting just yet. I had time. He couldn't tell yet! Good. I picked up my phone and unlocked the screen.

"I'm fine," I snapped, not wanting anything to do with the Alpha outside my door. I wanted my Alpha. My Katsuki. My mate. I mewled as my body shook and I suddenly gasped as the first real wave of heat hit me.

I dropped my phone again and bent over, gripping the sheets of the mattress as the first gush of slick trickled out of me. My cock throbbed and I whined lowly, shoving my face into the mattress. No, no, no, no, no.

"Izuku," The Alpha's voice strained and I knew he could smell me now. I whimpered and slipped down to the floor as my fingers shook while I tried to unlock my phone. I needed Katsuki. The door rattled and I whined as I quickly tried to find out how to unblock a number. Why did I ever block him in the first place? I scolded myself as I struggled to figure it out.

But it was too late. My bedroom door clicked and I knew he had unlocked it. I whined again and kept searching for how to unblock but my fingers shook and trembled as I grasped my cell. Shoto came rushing over with a look of worry on his face.

"Fuck, Izuku -- "Shoto furrowed his eyebrows and held his nose, pinching at the bridge.

"K - Katsuki -- " I whined and poked at my phone screen on the blocked number and Shoto's eyes widened.

"Oh, I - Izuku -- You can't call him," Shoto explained and I whined again still poking at the number. I wanted my mate. "Come on, let's get you to bed for the night --" Shoto struggled as he desperately tried to help me to my feet without touching my anywhere but my arms and sides. I shuddered each time he grasped me, it soothed some of the burn, but it wasn't right. Why did it help if he wasn't my mate?

I pulled away harshly with a cry of distress and tripped over my jeans on the floor. My body fell quickly and I smacked into the floor. My knees throbbed from my landing and I whined lowly before crumbling to the floor. I could see Shoto standing there looking horrified as my body shuddered and my thighs dampened with slick. Shoto's eyes widened and he covered his mouth and nose once more before slamming his eyes shut.

Images flashed back through my mind. Ones that I had long forgotten -- or so I thought.

***

"Ngaahh! P - Please, stop." I sighed when his tongue flicked the taught bud before he lowered himself down more. His hands dropped down to the waistband of my jeans as he trailed his lips and tongue down my torso. The line of spit leaving a cold tingle as it mixed with the air.

"That's a good boy." The Alpha cooed against my flushed skin. The sound of blood and static rushed my head, ringing behind my ears as my heart struggles to pump blood through my veins at the pace it was racing. But, before I could react, his hands roughly shoved me flat on my back onto the hardwood floor.

***

"A - Alpha," I whined and when I blinked open my eyes, I was on my hands and knees, crawling towards Shoto who was backed into the wall with dark eyes.

"Fuck," He cursed when I reached him and knelt up, grabbing fistfuls of the hem of his shirt while looking up at him. Shoto grabbed at my hands and pried them away from his body as he slipped away and walked to the other side of the bed -- keeping the mattress between us both -- a barrier. I didn't like that.

"No," I whined and stood up on shaky legs. Slick trickled down my thighs and I reached back and dipped a finger between my cheeks, letting out a needy moan. I pulled my hand away and smiled.

It was coated in slick. I was being a good Omega and presenting. I held my hand out towards Shoto and smiled.

"I'm a good Omega," I keened happily and watched as Shoto slowly dropped his hand from his face. His dark eyes raked over my dripping body. His nostrils flared as he stared at my slick-coated hand.

"You smell -- oh shit," He growled and I trembled before I stumbled my way to the bed where I flopped down and twisted my way around until I was on my hands and knees. My ass was up in the air. I needed an Alpha. I smelt like Shoto anyway, so this was fine, right?

"You smell like -- like honey," He growled from across the room and I wiggled my hips and moaned. I needed to be filled. That's all I needed.

That's all that mattered.

Once again, I never hated the fact that I was born an Omega. My sub-gender never made me feel week. However, I always hated my heats. I was mad that I lost control of my own rational thinking when my heat hit. I was angry with myself that I had to fight off my body's natural reaction each time I endured this.

I was done with the fighting.

I was tired of struggling.

I didn't care anymore.

In my heat-hazed mind, I didn't care. Shoto had been scenting me for a month. I smelt like him now. His scent was mixed with mine all over my skin and it eased the burn just enough to hold back any real pain. I carried his scent. It helped the transition from Katsuki to Shoto -- I think.

Katsuki was still in my mind. However, I smiled and arched my back when I felt the bed dip under Shoto's weight and two large, warm hands, grip the flesh of my ass.

I was a good Omega. I was going to be a good Omega. I was tired of being bad. All I did was hurt those around me. I hurt Katsuki. I hurt Mina. I hurt Shinos. I hurt my mom.

I - I used Katsuki. I was bad.

I wanted to be good.

Chapter Text

𝓚𝓪𝓽𝓼𝓾𝓴𝓲 𝓑𝓪𝓴𝓾𝓰𝓸𝓾

"I'm glad you came, man," Shitty hair's stupid smile was infectious but all I managed was a smirk back at him.

"Yeah, yeah," I shrugged him off as we walked through the crowded mall. I always hated these places but Kirishima wouldn't hop off my fuckin dick about getting out of the house. I didn't feel like socializing and preferred to hold up in my room and sulk.

"I shouldn't have eaten that much," He groaned and splayed his fingers over his slightly bloated stomach. I rolled my eyes and smirked.

"No one forced fed you all that beef," Honestly, Kirishima was an animal. He ate like a slob but I never cared. As long as he doesn't choke and make me put my lips anywhere near his face. I probably would let him choke. It would be his own damn fault anyway. Who shovels beef tips down their throat that fast anyway?

"Yeah, but it was so good," He slurred and licked his lips while I shot him a flat look. He punched my arm with an annoyed -- or maybe embarrassed -- look on his face. He should be embarrassed by the way he porked down his lunch like that in public. I laughed and stumbled slightly from his punch.

I wasn't sure how he managed to eat so much and still maintain his physique. I barely finished half my pork cutlet bowl before my stomach was hurting and I had to pack the rest to-go. I was still feeling queasy from the mall food-court food and placed my hand on my abdomen to soothe the ache. Definitely not used to eating that shit anymore.

"Your stomach hurting too? You hardly ate anything," He teased and I shot him a glare.

"Fuck off," I growled but smirked when he let out a happy laugh. I missed this idiot. We used to hang out all the time -- just us two, and it was nice. But lately, I haven't been willing to see just about anyone. I lived in my room and ate sporadically when no one was around. Late-night trips to the kitchen for leftovers have kept me going enough not to starve. I did look a bit thinner now.

"Alright, let's go walk these calories off -- Oh! Cookies!" Kirishima ran off towards a stand where he all but pressed his face to the glass where all the freshly baked cookies were displayed. Dear Goddess, why did you send me this idiot for a best friend? I sighed but my lips twitched fondly as I followed after the exited Beta who was now drolling and scaring the employees.

***

"Did you have fun today?" Mom asked me as soon as I got home. I wasn't in the mood to chat. I had spent enough time being social -- a big ass deal considering I had isolated myself over the last month. I wanted nothing more than to run back to the seclusion of my bedroom and sleep off this stomach ache.

"It was fine," I replied and she gave me a smile.

"That's great. You needed some time with your friends," She cooed and I rolled my eyes but I couldn't argue. It did feel nice to get back out and see Kirishima. However, it did feel different without the rest of my friends. Well, what was left of my friends; Denki could fuck off for all I cared. I refused to talk to him after Izuku left.

My chest constricted as my mind once again wandered to my runaway mate. His absence in my life hurt. I had never felt this type of pain before. But after meeting Izuku and connecting with him more, I knew out bond had strengthened. Of course, his absence would hurt now. I couldn't feel him at all, and that scared me. Wherever he was, he was so far away that I couldn't even feel his emotional state or if he was in danger.

It had my Alpha nature on edge. My mate was out there and I couldn't even protect him. I knew Izuku and I had a lot to fix but I was willing to work on it. I was willing to try and fix my own shit so I could make him happy. My adoration for him was eating away at the anger and hate. I wanted him to smile more than I wanted to snap at him. He was changing me.

"Katsuki," My mom snapped her fingers in front of my face and I flinched back.

"What?" I hummed and shook my head. I need to go to bed or something. Too much people interaction for one day -- messing with my head.

"You spaced out, dear. Are you feeling okay? You look a little pale," She worried over me and I shook my head. Other than my stomach, I was fine.

"I just ate too much shitty food. I will be fine," I brushed her off and walked through the kitchen and towards the stairs. "I'm going to my room. I probably won't be down for dinner," I informed as I brushed past my father. He sat on the sofa and looked at me briefly before looking away.

I frowned and paused as my stomach rolled uncomfortably. Lately, my dad has been acting weird. Ever since Izuku ran away, he had been shut off from me. We were never super close, but at least he would speak to me. Part of me wanted to blame him for this shitstorm. If my parents had only treated my mate with some dignity and respect when they found out we were mated, then maybe Izuku would be in a better mental and physical place.

Instead, they ran him off. They scared him and made him feel like a monster for something he had no control over. Izuku was scared, alone, and being assaulted and has never gotten help for that. Everyone blamed him, and I understood why they would blame him, but it wasn't right -- not fully. Izuku did something wrong, but he was also a victim that night.

For some reason, the anger boiled up within me at this moment. They ruined everything that could have been with Izuku and I. I never once asked for him to be my mate. I never once asked to care about him. The mate bond pulled us together but there had been too much damage. Izuku needed me and I wasn't there for him -- Because of them.

I growled and turned my head towards where my father sat. My pheromones seeped into the room and he stiffened at the threatening scent. My father was an Alpha and I was an adult now. The scent I released was domineering and would be taken as a challenge. But I didn't care.

"You ruined my life," I growled and maybe I was being overdramatic, but I seriously felt as if my life had been ruined. My one chance at happiness was gone. Missing. Vanished. It was his fault. If he would have been kinder to my mate and helped him when I could not, then Izuku would more than likely be by my side right now.

I would not have been angry and confused over him. I would have understood. Someone should have discussed it with me. I was young -- yes -- but I was 14-years-old! I was old enough to understand. I might have been able to save Izuku from the pain of being alone for four years while I lived a clueless life, being angry at the wrong fucking person.

"Katsuki," He growled and stood up noticing my tense posture and bared teeth. I felt my gums ripping as my canines dropped for the first time. I had never been so angry -- not at Izuku -- not at anyone. I was livid and it was all aimed at him. Both of them. My gaze shifted towards my mom as she stepped into the room with wide eyes, obviously turned into the sudden shift in pheromones in the room.

"Come on, honey -- Take a deep breath and relax. Tell us what's wrong," She tried to soothe me but I snapped and walked up to her as she backed up. My father was up and standing in front of me to block his wife.

"You both ruined everything! Izuku is gone because of you!" I yelled and felt my body tremble as a wave of unease washed over me. I swayed but held myself upright. My mom smacked my father's arm and shoved him out of the way.

"Jesus Christ, Masaru. I can handle my own son. Alpha or not -- I brought him into this world, I can take him fucking out." She snapped and my father blinked in surprise but stepped aside. I snarled and ran my tongue over the sharp teeth that now set in my mouth. That was new -- weird.

"Put those things away and settle down," She snapped and I growled and stepped back but swayed on my feet. My stomach lurched in my throat and I broke out in a sweat. A wave of nausea crashed over me and I gagged before backing away and shuddering.

"Shit, are you okay?" My mom worried and rushed over to me and I snapped my teeth at her again. I didn't want to see them. They -- They ruined my life. They ruined my mate. I whimpered as my stomach burned and rolled with irritation. I shook my head and tried to turn to leave but suddenly cried out and bent at the waist before emptying my stomach of everything I had eaten today.

"Fuck ---" I croaked and heaved a few more times before my body wobbled and I backed away from where I had just vomited all over the fucking floor. My father was gripping my arm and helping me stand up while my mother raced back in the room with a bottle of water. The worry in her eyes made me almost regret snapping at her. Almost, but not really.

My stomach lurched again and I gagged, feeling another urge to throw up but nothing came up.

Instead, my stomach coiled and my legs shook while struggling to hold me up. Mom uncapped the bottle and pressed it to my lips but I shook my head, afraid to open my mouth and spew more vomit everywhere. I jerked my arm out my dad's grip and stumbled over to the wall to hold myself up on my jello legs.

"Son, you okay? What's going on? You're not acting like yourself --" My dad moved to my side, dropping his angry Alpha facade and adopting the overprotective father in an instant. I gound my teeth in annoyance, suddenly becoming resentful for all the years of shelter and protection they forced on me while growing up. Them sheltering me is what brought this on.

I breathed quickly and shivered as my stomach dropped and I suddenly felt weak in the kneen. I could have prevented this -- but I didn't know. I didn't know and my mate suffered because of my ignorance. I barely knew anything about mates or Omegas and my parents didn't explain things to me or help me come to terms with my mateship. I get that they wanted to protect me, but they ruined me. No wonder Izuku left -- No wonder -- No fuckin' wonder.

I gasped as a sudden pain ripped through my core. White hot and searing, my hips felt as if they were being ripped from their socket, and I screamed. A howl of shocked and confusing pain ripped through the air while the trembling in my legs only intensified. I was no longer able to gather my strength to even hold myself up. The wall seemed less stable -- or was it the shaking of my limbs that made the fixture seem unsteady?

They were shaking beneath my weight and all my body wanted to do was slide down the walls plastered behind me in a heated mess. My parents remained fixated on the sounds that were ripping from my throat while they hovered around me, trying to find the reason behind my howl. But, they weren't going to find it -- not when I felt it all from inside me.

My hands reached down, my fingers twitching in the air while I pushed the length of my arms between both my thighs and squeezed them shut together. It was all I could do to stop the sensation of being spread apart. The pulling -- tugging -- or whatever was happening inside my body burned me to my core. Twisting and turning in waves while I writhed in its suffocating warmth. The salty sweat that dripped down my brow did nothing to quell the pool of heat that licked at my abdomen. I looked up desperately at my parents, both confused and mortified at what was happening to me. Was I sick? Was this normal?

The heat bubbled over and over again, somehow both filling me and leaving me empty until my howls turned into soft whimpers. My head rocked back and forth along, banging into the wall behind me. My eyes were squeezed shut, but the nausea that I had been feeling all day finally started to subside. Drifting away and replacing with something that made my heart pound behind my rib cage. My mouth watered and a chill raced up my spine, fighting away the heat ever-so-slightly.

I could see the confusion in my parent's eyes while they spoke above me but their words were muffled behind the thrumming of my heart -- the blood rushed behind my ears. They reached down, fingers fluttering over my fevered skin, brushing along and leaving gooseflesh in their wake. The soft touching was more than my mind could handle and a low moan rumbled within me.

My mother jerked away first and I swore my face would have been red with embarrassment if my skin had not already been tinted pink with fever. My body trembled and I squeezed my legs shut around my arms tighter than before. I could feel the all-too-familiar coil in my stomach as my soft cock began to twitch. The burning within was no longer painful but ached in a way that had me gasping and clenching the muscles in my hips and thighs.

"M - Mom --" I gasped and shook my head, not daring to look up at them knowing how my body was reacting. I could smell the change in the air -- I could smell my arousal.

"What's happening to me?" I cried out, suddenly terrified at the foreign pleasure ripping through my body. My hips rock as I stay crouched down on the floor and clenching my legs together around my arms.

My parents shared a look of confusion before my mom's eyes widened and focused on me once again and never before have I ever wanted to crawl in a fucking hole and die. Sweat dripped down my forehead and into the corner of my lips; I wanted to cry. I didn't understand what was going on. However, as soon as I felt the overwhelming urge to break down into tears, everything stopped. The pressure within vanished and I was left gasping as my ass suddenly clenched and I was left feeling terrifyingly empty.

"M - Mom," I whimpered in utter confusion as my body was left in a half-aroused state. I shrunk back, trying to hide from their shocked expressions. My mom covered her mouth with a shaking hand.

"Son, I - I think -- Fuck," My dad cursed and squeezed his eyes shut. I looked between them both, my body a trembling sweat-soaked mess.

"What the fuck is happening to me and what aren't you telling me!?" I screamed, my voice cracking as I hugged my arms around my knees, keeping them pressed to my chest in a desperate attempt to hide my erection.

"It's the bond," My mom whispered and I narrowed my eyes, my expression falling flat. Did this have something to do with Izuku? Was he hurt?

"Oh Goddess -- It's Izuku, isn't it? Is he okay?" I tried to stand up and shook on my wobbly legs. My dad grabbed me and held me up while my mom looked off in another direction. Her lips turned down in a frown.

"Son," My father started but I jerked my arm away from him.

"No, stop fuking lying to me and tell me what is going on! I am so sick and tired of being in the dark. You both are ruing everything! I don't even know what is happening to m - my body!" I shouted and clutched my arms around myself, desperate to just hide away from everything.

"That -- That was fucked up and I don't even know what it was! How could you do this to me? How could you let me become so weak and defenseless? I lost my mate! My one chance at true happiness and I was too confused to understand him! You made me this way! I had no idea -- I didn't know -- I didn't know. Fuck you!" I screamed as tears freely cascaded down my cheeks. My mom was crying and my father stood with clenched fists.

"I hate you! Fuck you! Fuck you b-"

"Izuku's having sex with someone else," My mom spoke up finally.

"What?" I whispered feeling my heart stop for a moment before it began hammering away at my ribs.

"That's what you were feeling, the betrayal in your bond. You were -- feeling what -- oh Goddess have mercy," My mom whispered to herself, never once looking me in the eyes. My mouth went dry as I stared down at my body that was slowly calming down. However, I didn't have time to think before my knees turned to jelly and I sank to the floor as the burning inside me filled me to my core.

"Fuck! Make it stop!" I screeched and clawed at my stomach. Now that I knew what was happening, what I was feeling, it made it all the more terrifying. I was feeling someone fuck my mate. I felt the bile rise within once again as the waves took back over my body. They covered me and I whined lowly as the pressure built once again.

"S - Stop, Izuku," I moaned and shook my head as my parents both grabbed me and hauled me to my feet. I winced and jerked as their hands left uncomfortable trails along my skin.

"I'm sorry, baby," My mom cooed and I groaned as I grit my teeth. I desperately tried to hold back any unwanted noises as my body repetitively forced me to experience the same thing my mate was feeling. I clutched at my stomach to smolder the shredding feeling that I could only assume was the feeling of my mate being impaled on some other man's dick.

"Stop," I whimpered. My tears ran freely and I choked back my soft groans and whines. I hated this but my mind faltered. Was Izuku okay? Was this consensual? Was he being forced to do this? It's too early for another heat. Has he moved on already?

I found myself being gently dropped onto my bed and I groaned and slammed my hands down into the mattress as the waves picked up their pace -- and so did my tears. Without another word, my parents left to give me privacy.

I was glad; I didn't want them seeing me this way. My body writhed and twitched as I flipped onto my stomach and buried my face into my pillows. My hips absentmindedly rutted into the bed as I try to alleviate the painful tension in my groin.

I tried to fight it. I -- I tried.

However, I let out a scream and felt my body jerk harshly with my release as one final uncomfortable yet pleasurable stretch filled me to my core and I instantly knew what that was. I choked on my own saliva and jerked a few more times as I emptied myself in my jeans -- and the fullness lasted longer than I wanted -- confirming everything I had already known.

I lied there, afraid to move as if it were me lying face down and attached to some other man's knot. My thoughts were trapped on Izuku and even as I lie there, limbs twitching and panting for breath, I worry. I worry for my mate, wondering what happened to him, hoping that he was safe. I found myself praying that this was just a nightmare that would blow over once I woke up. Izuku would be fine and this was just a dream. Everything would be back to normal once I woke up.

I lied there in silence as tears ran down my cheeks and soaked my pillows. I lied there until I felt the pressure leave my body and I could breathe again. I lied there and told myself these things until my heart stopped threatening to explode and I could breathe normally again. I lied there and cried.

I just -- I just lied there.

Chapter Text

𝓘𝔃𝓾𝓴𝓾 𝓜𝓲𝓭𝓸𝓻𝓲𝔂𝓪

I didn't think about it too much.

It was just sex. Nothing more. I needed this if I was going to get better. I couldn't go back to suffering my heat all alone again. I couldn't do that again. Last time it almost killed me. Plus, I wanted this. My body wanted this. I had grown comfortable with Shoto over this last month and my body wore his scent.

My body trembled under the blanket of warmth that the Alpha's hands brought me. My body submitted to him as I felt his breath tickle the base of my spine. The mattress shifted under his movements until he was kneeling behind me. I wanted it this way. He wasn't my mate; this was sex, nothing more.

So, I pressed my cheek to the cool sheets and curled my fingers into the edge of the mattress while Shoto ran his hands over my back and thighs. His fingers dipped into the soft points of my hips as he pulled me back towards him gently. A low moan rattled in my chest and my hips jerked. I was dripping and I knew the Alpha was struggling.

"Izuku," He almost whined and I shuddered, a new stream of slick trickled down my thighs and Shoto growled behind me. His hands moved back to my cheeks and gripped firmly, prying them apart. I could feel the twitching of my entrance as the Alpha held me open shamelessly.

"Shoto, please," I groaned as the burn collected in the pit of my stomach. I didn't need any foreplay – not in my heat. My body would be fine.

"Just do something already," I whined and pushed my hips back at him. I felt his fingers twitch as he held my ass before a low growl parted his lips.

"Izu – This is – This is so fucked up," He whispered, and I whined as I pushed my hips back at him again. I didn't care; I knew what I wanted. I wanted the pain to go away and, for once, I wanted to have a normal heat cycle.

"Please, don't leave me like this! W – We talked about this! You promised you'd take care of me!" I growled, aggravated that I was still bending over for an Alpha that wasn't fucking me. This was just sex and we talked about this already. I consented; was he still worried about that?

"Izuku," He growled, and I whined again. He was frustrating me to no ends. I was in pain and he was my designated Alpha right now. This was his job; Shoto promised to take care of me during my heat.

"I fucking consented already!" I hissed and arched my back as another wave of heat rushed my system.

"Goddamnit, Izuku!" Shoto growled and gripped my hips before flipping me on my back. "I can't just have s - sex with you like this. You -- You don't know what you're asking for. You don't really want this!" He scolded and I hissed at him for taking me out of my pose of submission. My body shivered, wanting to flip back around and submit again. This was exactly what I wanted. He knew that! We talked about it before! I struggled to turn over and he grabbed my hips, pinning them down to the bed roughly. I wiggled and yowled in frustration.

"Stop!" He growled, but the Alpha command didn't go unnoticed and my body went limp. A small whimper parted my dry lips. I licked at them while staring at the Alpha above me with half-lidded eyes. Shoto panted, his cheeks tinted pink and his eyes dark and dilated. He pinned my hips down still but slowly pulled back and sat back on his haunches.

My body was limp, lying prone on the bed still under his command. I can't deny that it sent a thrill through me as my body refused to move other than the slight twitching of my fingers. I moaned and whined, wanting to thrash and claw at my skin. The heat boiled inside my core and I desperately wanted to rut my hips against something to get some relief.

"Please -- What are you doing, Alpha?" I whined and my fingers twitched by my sides. I was in pain again and wanted to be sated. Why was he fighting me on this? "Shoto --" I whined again and tears pricked in my eyes as the bubbling heat rolled through my stomach and hips.

"I --" Shoto squeezed his eyes shut and shook his head.

"Please, please, Shoto. You have to help me, Alpha. I need you to help me," I begged and keened. My toes twitched and I wanted to turn over and submit but I was frozen under his command. I panted and watched the Alpha kneeling over me with hooded vision.

"Fuck, Izuku. No, just -- Fuck --- Fuck," He shook his head but his hands absentmindedly wandered back to my hips where he gripped and ran his hands over my stomach and thighs. I moaned and shivered but it wasn't nearly as violent as it felt inside. My body was still frozen and burning. I wasn't able to touch myself due to the command and Shoto was only providing some relief with his palms tracing my skin.

"Please, just get inside me. It h - hurts!" I grit my teeth and held back tears. My hips ached and my insides cramped and twisted in irritation. "It hurts!" I yelled at him and his eyes snapped open. Pitch black and dilated, he glared at me and bared his teeth in an obvious struggle.

"Turn over, Izuku," Shoto commanded and I moaned loudly as my body absently flipped onto my stomach and I pushed myself onto my hands and knees. I pressed my chest to the mattress with my ass presented in the air once more. A moaned bubbled up at the pleasurable feeling of being stretched and open for the taking.

"Okay," The Alpha whispered to himself and I listened to the shuffling behind me and the sound of a zipper dropping. I moaned lowly and pressed my cheek to the bed while I waited for what my body craved.

It only took a few seconds before I gasped and something pressed against me. I moaned lowly and rolled my hips. It was obviously the Alpha's finger pressing against my rim instead of his cock, but at least it offered some relief. I arched my back and wiggled my hips.

"Mmph -- More," I demanded and growled but yelped when his hand came down on my ass with a sharp smack. I jumped and a moan ripped out of my throat. I could hear the amusement in his voice as he chuckled.

"Calm down, Omega," It was obvious the humorous lilt to his voice and I grinned into the mattress. Shoto ran his free hand over my back, soothing the tension in my spine as I settled myself. His touch was doing wonders for my heat -- Katsuki was better.

"More," I snapped, shutting my eyes and clearing my head of my mate. This didn't involve him. This was me and Shoto just trying to get me through my heat -- nothing more.

"Shoto, I said m --" My demands were cut off with a high pitch whine as the Alpha sunk a single digit inside my dripping hole. I felt nothing other than a slight stretch that faded away quickly as my body demanded more.

"More," I choked out and pushed back on his finger. Shoto faltered in his movements and ran his hand over my back soothingly.

"Relax, I really -- I just don't want to hurt you, Izuku. Hold on," He begged softly and I rolled my eyes. I wasn't made of glass and my body was built for this. I was in heat, he wouldn't hurt me unless he just fucked me without any kind of preparation -- and even then it would barely sting.

"I'm fine," I gritted through clenched teeth and Shoto growled.

"If you don't fucking stop it Izuku ---" Shoto trailed off and I could feel the aggravation rolling off him so I stopped my complaining and let him prep me. I shuddered when he pushed a second finger in and flicked them both in a steady rhythm. A loud moan ripped from my throat and I rocked my hips, forcing his fingers to move more.

"Okay, okay -- I'm ready," I start and Shoto shut me up with another harsh slap to my thigh. However, it only spurs more moans to spill from my lips along with a trickle of drool. He shifts behind me and pulls his fingers gently from my body. It's obvious he hasn't been with an Omega before. He was too gentle. The heat pooled in my stomach again the moment his fingers left me and I squirmed. I just wanted not to be in pain anymore. I didn't want to hurt any longer. I had been in pain for so long -- I wanted to be normal. Shoto made me feel normal.

"O - Okay, Izuku are you sure?" The Alpha knelt up behind me and grabbed my hips and I could feel him trying to turn me over on my back again. I flinched from his touch.

"No! -- I mean, yes. Yes, I am sure. No, I want to stay on my knees," I said breathlessly as my body ached and trembled. I didn't want to turn over and watch him fuck me. I squeezed my eyes shut and arched my back longingly. There was a slight pause before the Alpha moved again. This time I knew exactly what was happening.

The blunt tip pressed against my entrance and Shoto eased forward. My body accepted him readily and a low moan slipt my lips as the tip passed the first ring of muscles. Shoto groaned and I could feel his hands shake on my hips. I pushed back, forcing more of him inside me and he gasped and pressed down on my lower back.

"Goddess, calm down," He scolded and I growled. Why wouldn't he just move already? I rocked my hips and kept pushing back, fighting against his grip that tried to hold me still. "Fuck! Whatever -- F - Fine," The Alpha stuttered and let go of my hips, letting me sink back and take him whole. I mewled and wiggled my hips back into him as I seated myself on his length. He was big and thick, pressing into me nicely as a shiver ran through me.

Shoto was trembling, holding still and letting me take the leade, and unnatural thing for an Omega in heat. I didn't want control. I wanted to be fucked. I wanted kinky fuckery that only an Alpha could give me and right now I wanted Shoto.

"Move," I hissed and slammed back on his cock. I gasped as he reached deeper inside me and I cried out a string of moans and pleads for more. The Alpha took pity on me and gave in to my heat-crazed chirping and desperate moans. He grabbed my hips and jerked me back on his length once, causing me to shout and throw my head back. He pulled himself back, sliding out of me until the tip kissed my fluttering rim. I all but cursed him out but before I could he was slamming back inside me and picking up a pace that had me mumbling into the sheets.

Shoto was quiet as he fucked me but I didn't care. I talked, begged, mumbled nonsense, and cried out in pleasure. The pain was going away and I finally could relax. I wanted to stay like this forever. No more pain -- only pleasure. The Alpha had better get used to it now because my heats last roughly five days.

Fingers dug into my thighs and jerked them apart, forcing me to split my legs open onto the bedding as Shoto pressed his body down over my back. His hands moved to the dip in my back and held onto both sides as he slid himself in me gently a few times before leaning down and pressing soft kisses to my back. I whimpered and pushed my ass up as he moved until he got tired of my needy behavior and started driving into me harder.

My slick dripped from my body as he pulled more loud cries from me. He tucked one hand under my hips and wrapped around my neglected member, tugging the sensitive skin until I was shouting and tears were streaming down my cheeks.

"M - More," I croaked and whined as he pulled out of me and softly ran his hands over the flesh of my ass. "What?" I whimpered and looked back at him. The Alpha was flushed, panting and staring at me with dark eyes and a worried expression.

"Turn over or something, Izuku -- This -- This isn't like me. I can't just," He shut his eyes and shook his head. I groaned and rolled over onto my back. My legs trembled as my hips rolled in seek of friction. I felt a little bad for putting Shoto in this situation with me, but he did offer. He did agree. I fought the overwhelmingly annoying urge to turn back over onto my hands and knees and stayed on my back.

Shoto looked me over and smiled a tiny apologetic smile.

"I knew this is hard on you too, Izuku. But you're being so good for me." I perked up at his praise and a soft purr rattled my chest. Shoto chuckled and brushed the damp hair from my face. I whined lowly and let him soothe me. It felt nice being praised. In an Omega's heat, complex things didn't matter. Most Omegas just wanted to be told they were good -- a good Omega. I preened over his compliment for a while as he brushed his fingers over my face and jaw before he settled back between my thighs.

"That's it. You're so beautiful," Shoto whispered softly to me and I purred louder as he gripped my thighs and pulled me closer to him, lifting my hips off the bed to allow him better access.

"Nngh -- Thank - ha -- you," I moaned and shuddered as he sunk back into my body. My eyes widened at this new angle and slick gushed around his cock making his eyes go impossibly dark and a low growl parted his lips.

"Damn, how are you still s - so tight?" He questioned and I gasped as he dug his fingers into my hip while the other hand wrapped around my leaking member. He jerked me off in time with his thrusts until I was screaming in his empty house. I had never had sex this early into my heat before and every ounce of me loved it. The pain was gone and I had never felt so satisfied in my life.

"G -- Good boy. Let go, Izuku. I've g - got you," Shoto cooed through stuttered words and leaned down over me before pressing a soft kiss to my cheek. He moaned lowly as I clenched around him suddenly. My orgasm ripping through me unexpectedly and coating the panes of our stomachs in between us.

"Ah! S - Shoto! More!" I screeched and shook violently as he fucked me through my orgasm. He growled in my ear before kneeling up and gripping my hips. He jerked me towards him again before thrusting harshly, picking up a rough and fast pace that had me seeing stars. I blinked up at the Alpha and he gave me a soft smile while reaching down and wiping a line of spittle from my mouth. I moaned as he drilled into that bundle of nerves that had me screaming out again.

He muffled me, shoving his fingers into my mouth. My eyes widened as he growled and rutted into me faster. I garbled around his fingers, spewing incoherent phrases that made perfect sense in my head. This was everything I had ever wanted -- a normal heat cycle. For once in over four years I was finally being taken care of. The pain was gone, being replaced by searing hot pleasure as my member throbbed between our sweat and cum-coated bodies.

"Oh Goddess, Izuku -- I'm gonna cum," He hissed through clenched teeth and I jerked as he hit my prostate with a rough thrust. He dug his fingers into my thighs and I was sure they would leave marks -- but I didn't care. My eyes rolled in my head as his rhythm stuttered and I lost myself in pleasure. For once there was no pain. I wasn't in pain. I smiled to myself as the Alpha grunted and brought my body to new heights.

He curled his fingers into my hips now and jerked me towards him with every thrust. The new angle and force had me squealing and shaking as another orgasm hit suddenly. My walls clenched around him and twitched as a low and tense growl seeped through the Alpha's lips as he let me ride out my high. He pressed forward as a sharp pain had me opening my eyes. I gasped at the utterly fucked-out look on Shoto's face as he pressed in me deeper.

I hadn't realized what was happening until it was too late. He gasped and moaned lowly as his hips jerked and his knot slipped past my rim, locking us together as he pumped me full of his hot release. I yelped but cried out in pleasure and shock as his knot forced another orgasm and I shook while my eyes rolled.

"S - Shit -- Fuck, I'm sorry! I -- I'm sorry, Izuku. I couldn't s - stop until -- oh Goddess," Shoto winced and apologized through his release. My body trembled and he pulled back in his shock. I yelped as he pulled my body back with him. My eyes slammed shut at the pain and he froze instantly noticing my distress.

"Shit -- Ah, I'm sorry," He panted and gripped my hips softly, holding us together to ease my pain. It hadn't caught up to me yet what he had done. I was tired -- sated. My eyes grew heavy and I heaved a sigh of relief. There was no more pain and somewhere in the back of my head, I was happy -- happy and sad. I didn't know why I was sad -- not yet anyway.

Chapter Text

𝓚𝓪𝓽𝓼𝓾𝓴𝓲 𝓑𝓪𝓴𝓾𝓰𝓸𝓾

I was more confused than anything. After going through what had just happened, I was in a state of shock. Not only because I had just felt my mate getting fucked by someone else -- but also because it only happened once. It completely shook down the one thing that was keeping me together. The one thing that was holding my anger and pain was the fact that I blamed it on Izuku's heat.

But it wasn't his heat if it only happened once. Unless Izuku came to his senses and kicked the guy out. However, I highly doubt that was the case. More than likely it was my mate deciding to sleep with another man, and that hurt more than I could have prepared for.

I lied in my room for a few days after the incident. I didn't dare move or leave the confinement of my bedroom. I was beyond embarrassed and mortified about what had happened in front of my parents. I was angry -- angry at my mother and father -- angry at myself -- angry at whoever was touching my mate.

For once, the only person I was not angry at was Izuku.

I wasn't mad at him. I was worried about him. I tried calling him again after I was released from the phantom feelings of what Izuku was experiencing. I called and sobbed over the voicemail -- begging him to call me back and just talk to me. I don't remember a time before that I had cried so hard.

Three days had passed and I still refused to venture out of my safety. I couldn't face my parents right now, and they knew to stay away. I was pissed and couldn't be sure that the next time my father opened his mouth about my mate that I wouldn't rip him apart. They lied to me for so long and let me become the asshole that I was.

Even a part of me knew that they wanted to protect me, but by protecting me at the moment, they ruined me. They ruined Izuku. The Omega suffered for so long and I didn't care until recently. They let me continue on that path of hatred and now I have lost my mate. My friends have torn apart and Izuku was off who-knows-where.

My mind took me back to the fact that he was fucking someone else and I wanted to be mad. I wanted to throw a fit and scream. I wanted to hunt him down and demand his return -- but that would get me nowhere. Izuku wanted to leave, for whatever reason he did, and now I must deal with the consequences of his actions -- of both our actions. I only hoped that he wasn't being forced into anything. If he chose to sleep around, that was his choice. I wished he wouldn't because he knew I would feel it. Did he know to the extent though? Maybe he did and this was my punishment for hurting him and failing as his Alpha.

I curled my body up and stretched my stiff limbs out. I would need to get food soon and work out the kinks in my back from sleeping all the time. I shifted and moved out of my messy bed and took a sniff. I flinched and groaned. I smelt terrible and needed a shower. The promise of a hot shower encouraged me to move again and I quickly found myself in the shower, under the jets, and closing my eyes as the water worked my body into relaxation.

***

"How are you feeling?" Mom asked while placing a pile of pancakes in front of me. I shot her a bored look and frowned.

"Like I have been fucked emotionally and physically," I scoffed and stabbed a few of the sugary cakes and dropped them on my plate. My mom sat there quietly and let me eat in silence. I didn't want to look at her knowing she saw me utterly fucked out the other day. I wished it could be forgotten actually.

I wondered how she dealt with it all -- being an Omega to an Alpha mate. It seemed that biology helped for the most part. Omega's wanted to submit to their specific Alpha. alpha's wanted to protect and provide for their Omega. Then how did my mateship get so screwed up?

"What's on your mind, son?" She asked me softly, placing a hand on my back that instantly had me flinching at the touch. I didn't want anyone's hand on me for a long while. What I experienced was awful. The worst part was that my body didn't hate it. It went against Alpha nature to be fucked by other Alpha. However, my body responded with the pain of Izuku's heat and the pleasure he felt from the man's touch -- and I felt it all.

She removed her hand and I could tell she was giving those goddamn eyes. The ones where she pities me and feels the need to coddle me as if I were still a child. I wasn't a child. I might be young still, but I was an adult according to our laws. I had a mate, I was 18, and had the ability to claim pack members. However, my nature was clawing at me to listen. My nature wanted me to be with my mate, my pack, and to reproduce. I could do none of those things. Not without Izuku.

"How do you do it?" I asked finally breaking down my walls. I was tired -- so tired. It had only been a little over a month and I was borderline insane. I had been on edge all the time to the point of having fits of rage and then locking myself away for days on end. Now, I just wanted to know how to heal.

"Do what?" She replied softly, turning her body to face mind. However, I still couldn't bring myself to look her in the eyes.

"Be -- Be a good mate? You're an Omega, yet you are strong and stand up for yourself," I took a deep breath and closed my eyes. "When I met Izuku again after all those years, he wasn't like you. H - He was weak and sick; I never understood why really. I knew it had to do with being separated from me for so long, but damn -- he was doing rough," I sighed and mom inhaled deeply.

"Izuku's nature was fighting against him for over four years, Katsuki. He is an Omega, and being an Omega comes with its challenges. For one, we need our mates. Once we find them, our world shifts, like I know yours did as well when you finally laid eyes on him once you were of age," I nodded but frowned. Looking back, my world had changed when I laid eyes on him. I had never felt my instincts take over like that. I had never felt the overwhelmingly powerful urge to protect before then either.

"Yeah, well I fucked it up, mom. I almost rejected him -- why hasn't he rejected me yet?" I whisper the last question, feeling my heart twist in pain at the thought. My mom sighs and places her hand on my leg but I didn't pull away this time.

"We've sheltered you too much, Katsuki. What we did, we did out of love. Perhaps we went about it wrong but -- but we loved you so much and when we saw you in distress, it took us by surprise. We are your parents and all we wanted to do was shield you from any more harm. By doing so, we left you vulnerable. You were unprepared to handle your mate when you went to him. You were uneducated about the things Izuku would need. What little experience you had with Omegas, you had from Denki, and that boy was confused as ever." I scoffed at the mention of Denki but kept quiet not to explode. They had sheltered me and this was the first time one of them admitted to their mistakes.

"I want to be so mad at you both," I choked and gritted my teeth together. "I wanted to rip dad's head off the other night. I wanted to hurt you both for what you grown in me. I had no chance at all with my mate. I was messed up and broken. I couldn't provide for him without knowing one thing about mates or Omegas. I am a fucking Alpha and I had no clue what to do for him!" I seethed and curled my fingers into the corner of the table trying to calm myself.

"I know, son," My mother whispered and I growled.

"I need h - help," I cried and hung my head as the tears fell freely now. I gave up holding it back. I might not have let this redeem my parents in my eyes. But I would throw away the memories for now and focus on fixing myself. If Izuku never returned to me then I needed to live on.

"Your father blames himself for letting Izuku hurt you that night and I have told him a hundred times that he shouldn't. But we are parents Katsuki. We wanted to keep you safe but in the process -- we hurt you worse than Izuku ever could have. But -- But we just wanted to do what was best for you, son," She wrapped her arm around my shoulders and I leaned into her warmth.

"I -- I don't know what to do, mama," I whisper and she pulled me into her and pressed her cheek to the top of my head and cooed softly.

"Just live, baby. Take care of yourself and the rest will come when it's time," She kissed my forehead and I clenched my teeth to hold back the stupid tears.

"Tell me more -- about Omegas. I want to know more about what Izuku was going through," I ask and my mom shook her head.

"You don't need to beat yourself up --"

"Tell me," I growled and pulled out of her arms. "I need to know or else I will never get over what I did to him, mom," I demanded and she paused, looking me over before sighing and nodding.

"Okay -- What do you want to know first?"

"Would he have died if I rejected him that day?" The question poured out of me instantly and my mom flinched -- so did I.

"Yes, more than likely he would have. His body was too weak. I can only imagine," She sighed heavily and I nodded while swallowing thickly as waves of guilt wash over me. "I honestly don't understand how he managed to stay alive before you got there," She whispered and I growled, remembering something.

"Pills -- he was taking some kind of drug. I heard him talking about it. Gods mom, I drove him to drugs," I whispered and buried my face into my palms.

"Pills?" She questioned and was silent for a while before she gasped and sat up. "Goddess," She breathed and I looked up at her horror-stricken face.

"What?" I croaked, not prepared for her to scold me for what I was already feeling.

"Pills -- Katsuki he wasn't taking drugs. He -- He was on heat suppressants. No wonder --" She breathed and I sat up stiffly.

"What are heat suppressants?" I demanded and she looked at me with a sad smile.

"I'm sorry for letting you grow up uninformed, son," She closed her eyes but I growled.

"Tell me," I demanded and she nodded.

"Heat aids, or suppressants, are used to defer an Omega's natural heat cycle. Normally an Omega goes into heat once every three months. On heat aids -- they can be pushed to once every six months," She explained and I blinked. That didn't seem healthy. I wasn't an Omegas but I knew enough to know that heat cycles are important to regular an Omega's emotional state as well as their physical.

"I can see your worry -- Yes, they are not healthy to take at all. Let alone for four years in a row," She exhaled lowly.

"So -- The heat aids made him -- survive?" I asked and she looked at me with a quirked eyebrow.

"That, and the fact that he more than likely had Alpha friends that scented him. I doubted he would have slept around with them while waiting for you, son." I scoffed and looked away.

"Well -- he didn't have any issue with it the other night," I snapped and closed my eyes. My mom sighed and rubbed my back gently.

"Didn't you both mate when he went into heat here?" She asked and I flinched at the memory.

"Yeah," I swallowed and she hummed.

"He's an Omega, son. You have to understand -- he left. A very unnatural thing for an Omega to do. Meaning he was not in the right state of mind. No Omega leaves their mate like that without something serious going on with their mental and emotional state. I am sure Izuku was out of his rational mind at the time and his self-preservation took over. No Omega would willingly mate with another Alpha knowing they have a mate out there unless the Omega is in extreme distress. He wasn't doing it to get back at you for anything, son. I think Izuku is hurting and is trying to -- live." She explained and I blinked the tears from my eyes.

"I -- I really am an awful Alpha and mate," I whimpered and more tears ran down my cheeks while I stared blankly ahead.

"It's not your fault, son. We -- We messed you up some and -- your mateship was a difficult one that no one was expecting," She cooed and I just stared ahead flatly. I swallowed and looked down at my lap.

"Is he going to be okay? He -- He won't die out there without me, will he?" I asked shakily and my mom watched me carefully.

"No," She murmured and I nodded. "If he is mating through his heats and having someone watch out for him then he will get better. He may even come around to his senses."

"You never answered my question. Why has he not rejected me already?" I asked again, holding onto the hope that maybe he didn't want to break our bond.

"You can't reject mates unless you both are together and can see one another. Both parties have to agree verbally or else the bond won't fully sever and the pain will become unbearable -- but you would both live -- just in extreme pain forever," She sighed and I ran my fingers through my hair in distress.

"Do -- Do you think he will ever come back?" I choked out and looked up at my mom who watched me with teary eyes that matched mine. She didn't respond but only reached over and took my face in her smaller palms. I swallowed thickly and held her gaze as her eyes spilled over with tears.

"I don't know," She whispered and I nodded slowly before letting my gaze drop. She held my face tenderly before pulling away and pulling me over to her so I rested my head on her shoulder as I used to when a child. I didn't cry anymore. I only lied there and thought about my mistakes. I didn't forgive anyone -- anyone but Izuku. I didn't hate him. I wasn't mad that he was having sex or with another Alpha or even ignoring me.

I'd much rather know Izuku was alive and doing what he needed to do rather than wind up dying. A part of me held onto a spark of anger that Izuku ran without talking to me -- but if what my mom said was true then Izuku was not thinking clearly and everything that happened between us was a mistake -- hormone-driven and nothing else. I squeezed my eyes shut and my mom held me tighter.

"I'm sorry, Katsuki,"

"Me too -- " I croaked and sunk into her arms, giving myself some comfort and letting my mind put itself back together. It was time to heal. It was time to get better -- not just for myself, but for my mate. I would hold onto the hope that one day he would call me -- just one call. I would hold onto that hope and in the meantime, I will make myself into a better man.

A better Alpha. A better mate.

I would prove that Izuku could be safe and happy with me. If he came back -- I would be ready. I would fix this. I would fix us somehow, even if he never returned to me. I had to do something. Anything. With a new sense of confidence and understanding, I put on a brave face and get myself together. I kissed my mother's cheek and stand up before heading to my room.

I was going for a run. I smiled softly to myself as I force myself to do something that I used to do when I needed to clear my head. It's time I grow up. I have a mate to look after and if I could not take care fo myself then I would never become the provider and protector that Izuku needed. I would do better -- and it starts with me. It starts here. It starts now.

Chapter Text

𝓘𝔃𝓾𝓴𝓾 𝓜𝓲𝓭𝓸𝓻𝓲𝔂𝓪

Blinking my eyes, I pulled myself out of my sated slumber. The room was pleasantly cool on my limps that were splayed out from under the silk sheets. The parts of me under the duvet were warm and cozy. My body was heavy with sleep; I didn't want to move from the soft cocoon I made for myself. However, after a few blinks and a much-needed stretch, I lifted my head from the pillows to look around. Memories came flooding back.

I was shocked but that was to be expected. I wasn't shocked about the sex -- although a part of me felt different after the act. I was shocked because of something else. Shoto had knotted me and though I had not cared during the moment -- now I was tense all over. I didn't know what I had been expecting. I was willingly having sex with an Alpha while I was in heat. I shouldn't have been mad at him, but I was.

I was mad at myself but I didn't know why. I had asked for it and I wasn't upset that I slept with him. Shoto was my key to getting better and that made me feel sick. It felt as if I had been using him. It was an idiotic notion really. I wasn't using Shoto.

Like I used Katsuki.

I shook my head and carded my fingers through my tangled up curls. Kicking my feet over the edge of the bed, I jumped out of bed and winced slightly at the dull throb in my hips. I looked around noticing that the Alpha was nowhere to be found. It was strange for an Alpha to leave an Omega after mating -- and I felt it too. Something inside wasn't sitting right and I quickly slipped into the bathroom and washed up.

I let the hot water wash the sweat and grime off my skin only to stiffen as the proof of last night's mistake leaks from between my thighs. The water washed it away and I scrubbed harder, dipping my fingers inside the sore area to clean myself out. I grimaced and shut the water off before wapping in a towel and moving towards the bedroom again.

Finding clothing to wear had never taken so long before. However, I rummaged through my clothes and even Shoto's before finding something I wanted to wear. I felt off -- my skin was warm to the touch yet I felt no signs of my heat. It was like it vanished after last night. the pain was gone but I was left feeling grimy and heavy, bogged down by something. Guilt maybe?

I clicked my tongue and jerked on a pair of joggers and a hoodie before shuffling downstairs to the kitchen. Shoto was still missing and I felt the need to seek him out after waking up alone. I didn't want last night to ruin our friendship. Although I kept being reminded of the one thing I told him not to do.

He knotted me when I asked him not to. It was a stupid reason to ask him to hold back, honestly. I couldn't avoid getting knotted for the rest of my life just because I thought it would ease my guilt by letting that one thing belong to Katsuki.

It would be inevitable. I was an Omega and Alpha's love knotting us. Sure I could just find some Beta to be with later in life, but I know my biology and Omegan nature would always preen for an Alpha. My Alpha.

Fuck. I shook my head and padded barefoot into the kitchen where I find the missing Alpha. He was sitting at the dining table with a cup of coffee. His hair was tousled out of its normally combed and styled form. He wore his usual nightwear, a loose-fitting t-shirt, and joggers.

His eyes automatically flicked over to me, a look of surprise coating his features before it quickly morphed into concern. I could feel the tension in the air around us but I couldn't find it in myself to care. I was afraid that what we had done would somehow ruin our friendship. I was conflicted. Part of me wanted to scream at him for his lack of self-control. Another part of me wanted to beg for his forgiveness. I should have never asked that of him. It wasn't his job even if he was adopting the role of my Alpha -- he wasn't my Alpha.

I made my way over to him and dropped into the seat beside his. Not saying a word I lean my head over and place it on his shoulder, an act to comfort us both. I still felt confused and somehow sad. I wanted comfort but I also wanted to make sure my friend was okay.

"How are you feeling?" Shoto asked lowly, his voice thick with some emotion that I couldn't pinpoint. He placed his hand on top of my head and gently stroked through my curls, bringing a heavy feeling over my body as tears spring to my eyes. I wanted to run and hide in shame and guilt while another part of me wanted to cling to Shoto and let him soothe me.

"Hey," He whispered and turned to me, tilting my face up as his eyes widen to the sight of my tears. I dash them away quickly and his face twists up in pain. " Fuck, I am so sorry, Izuku," He spoke lowly with a painfilled voice as he tugged me closer, allowing me to nuzzle into his chest.

I didn't reply; I couldn't if I tried. I felt lost. Instead, I clung to him and let his scent surround me. It helped some but I felt wrong in my own skin. I felt the need to shower all over again just to feel my body relax under the heat.

"I should have been more careful. I should have stopped before --- before things got that far. I was responsible for you and I failed," Shoto mumbled into my hair while rubbing my back softly. I shook my head and whimpered.

"It's not your fault," I muttered and then he tensed for a moment, sniffing my neck before pulling back.

"We didn't use a condom. You went into heat. Why aren't you -- Why aren't you still in heat right now? Wait--" Shoto began looking me over, inhaling my scent and then looking at me once more. His face twisted into an expression of confusion and then a spark of hurt and... fear?

"What?" I questioned, feeling a bit dazed. My mind was everywhere, I couldn't keep up with the Alpha. I could barely focus on myself at the moment.

"You don't smell pregnant and you don't smell like you're in heat either. What the fuck? Did you -- Did you fake it or some shit?" He growled but seemed more hurt than angry. He moved me off him so that he could stand up. I blanched, face paling from his accusation and looked at him with wide eyes. Fake it? My heat?

More tears brimmed my eyes at his accusation. I already felt out of place and like something was wrong here and he asked me that? The Alpha growled lowly. IT sounded weaker than I expected and he began pacing the kitchen floor muttering under his breath before whirling on me. I startled with a gasp as he stalked over to me with wide eyes.

"Explain," He ordered and I gulped trying to hold back the tears that were about to spill. My heart thumped wildly as I tried to swallow and clear my throat.

"I --" I stammer for my words, struggling to find what I needed. I really didn't understand it either. I was in heat, wasn't I? I felt the pains and -- and I produced slick. It was a heat cycle. It had to be.

"Izuku," He begged and I flinched with a whimper.

"I don't know! I was in heat! I had to be! I wouldn't lie to you or trick you!" I yelled and wrapped my arms around my midsection as the tears broke free and I suddenly sobbed. I hugged myself and choked on sobs until Shoto cursed and dropped to his knees and pulled me into his arms and onto the floor. I fell into him and sobbed as he cooed softly for me, desperately trying to calm me down although all I felt was shame. I should have known something was wrong when I woke up with no heat symptoms.

"I'm sorry for snapping. I shouldn't have accused you of that. This is just strange. Your heat should not have ended so soon, Izuku. Plus -- We didn't use protection and I -- " He gulped and I filled in what he couldn't.

"Knotted me," I finished for him and he swallowed nervously.

"You don't smell pregnant," He stated again nervously and I bit the inside of my cheek.

"I'm on birth control --"

"Don't lie to me," He snapped then closed his eyes in an attempt to relax. I flinched but nuzzled into his chest again as an apology. Why was I lying to him? Why was I hiding from this? I did this to myself.

"Sorry," I whimpered and he stiffened for a moment.

"We need to take you to see a doctor soon. It may be too early," He whispered in a panic but I shook my head.

"No, no doctors," I protested but he scoffed and pushed me back to look in my eyes with a shocked look on his face. His eyes were serious. I didn't want to go to the doctor and have them tell me that I fucked my body up. I already knew I did. I had to. However, the older I got, the more I felt sick with the realization that I would never have kids.

"Are you crazy, Izuku? You're an Omega and were in heat. I k-knotted you without protection and don't try and lie about birth control. I haven't seen you take anything for the past month." He glared at me and I swallowed thickly before giving up and hanging my head.

"Remember how we briefly spoke about how I managed to survive four years of heat cycles with no mate?" I asked softly and Shoto nodded.

"Yeah, you took heat suppressants," He mumbled in thought before realization crossed his features and he frowned.

"Yeah. I more than likely fried my reproductive system. In college, the nurse told me that I was ruing my body and would probably never have kids," The thought brought tears to my eyes and I frowned. I never cried over that fact before. I dashed them away and Shoto frowned at me before standing up, bringing me with him. He helped me to my feet before walking over to his phone and dialing a number.

"Shoto?" I asked in confusion as he shot me a look that had me shutting up and sitting down at the table with a sigh. I really did mess everything up, didn't I?

"Hello, please cancel my meetings today and tomorrow. Yes, thank you. I will. Have a good day," Shoto hung up and then looked at me for a moment.

"What?" I mumbled, wiping away stray tears.

"We're going to see a doctor today, Izuku. I don't care if you don't want to!" He quickly shut me up as I was about to argue. I snapped my mouth shut. "I don't care. Something is not right. I can't believe you lasted this long. You are an Omega, Izuku. You should have been getting regular care for your reproductive health anyway -- before the heat aids! Have you ever been? Ever?" He asked with a raised voice. I could tell he was worried about me and I frowned. He shouldn't be worried because of me. Missing work because of me.

"No," I whispered and he groaned, running his hands down his face.

"I know you've been through -- a lot," He said calmly before coming to kneel down in front of my chair and place his hands on my knees. "No one had looked after you the proper way but I will not sit by and be another name added to the fucking list! You're going to get checked out. For fuck sakes, Izuku. You could be pregnant, you could be fertile, you could be infertile, you could be sick, and you'd never know!" He said with obvious concern in his voice and I flinched.

"I know," I whispered and he fell silent. I never looked at him. I couldn't. He was right about so much. I had let myself go. I hadn't taken care of myself or had anyone to take care of me properly. Even Mina and Shinos weren't able to fully take care of me. I shouldn't have to expect them to. It wasn't their jobs.

"Izuku," Shoto sighed and cupped my face in both his hands. I looked at him and frowned at his expression. He was sad.

"I'm sorry," I quickly said and he shook his head, giving me a soft smile that didn't reach his eyes.

"Enough of that. It's going to be okay. How about you make some breakfast and I will call around to see if there are any appointments available today?" He asked and brushed his thumbs under my eyes softly before caressing my face. I hummed and closed my eyes, not having it in me to argue. I knew he was right.

"Okay," I whispered and sighed when he pressed a kiss to my forehead.

"I'm sorry you're going through all this, but let me help you."

"I'm not pregnant," I stated for a fact. I didn't feel pregnant and I knew that if I didn't get pregnant form Katsuki last month then there was no way Shoto knocked me up now. However, the Alpha just grunted and stood up.

"I'll relax when the doctor confirms," He sighed and walked off after giving me a soft pat on the head. I stayed in the chair staring at the wall. Things had been going so well before now. I didn't want to be pregnant -- although I knew I wasn't. I didn't want to be sick. I didn't want to have a ruined body or messed up heat cycles. I wanted to be normal. I wanted to be normal.

I don't know how long Shoto was on the phone, but soon he came back and gave me a soft smile. He let me know that he found an opening for an hour from now and that I should go get ready quickly.

"This is a good thing, Izuku. You can finally get some real information and hopefully some good news. Don't stress, Izu," Shoto sighed and pulled me up into his arms seeing that I was not moving. I wasn't sure what to do really. I was afraid to know what was going on with my body. Part of me still wanted to cry. Part of me still wanted to beg my mate for forgiveness.

I clung to Shoto as he held me in his arms and walked us to my bedroom. He was tense and I knew we had yet to work out our own issues after last night. But right now I was thankful that the Alpha was mature and willing to help me. He kept his cool much better than I had expected. I relaxed as he sat me on the dresser in my room and carefully scented me, helping me relax and calming the inner chatter.

Chapter Text

𝓚𝓪𝓽𝓼𝓾𝓴𝓲 𝓑𝓪𝓴𝓾𝓰𝓸𝓾

"Good afternoon and thank you for joining us this afternoon at West Central University. You are all here because of a shared interest in attending this University starting in the upcoming Fall semester." The chair of the education department stood on the stage. His suit was navy blue paired with a pink bowtie. His hair was styled back and his appearance assumed professionalism although he grinned and almost bounced with every step he took.

"What a fruit loop," Mom sat next to me in the sea of other potential college students. She didn't want to be sitting smushed between me and some other poor kids' parents. She was supportive of my decisions though and wanted to tag along as I visited some universities.

"Hag," I quipped and grunted as the back of her hand made contact with my stomach. "Fuck, woman," I hissed and she shot me a glare. My dad sat on my other side and chuckled at our antics.

"Today I want to talk to you all about potential!" My attention was drawn back to the man on stage while I tuned out my parents on either side of me. "Potential and opportunity, specifically. Each and every one of you sitting out there today has noticed an opportunity, and by being here today you have shown part of your potential." I zoned out after that. Although it was lovely to hear him so passionate about recruiting new students, I was here for actual information.

West Central University had an amazing engineering program and I wanted to get the information, find out how much debt I would be going into over this degree, and then go home. The thought was nice, but the whole motivational speech thing wasn't my style. However, the man on stage caught my attention when his tone turned more serious.

"Understand that life is full of challenges and decisions. You may leave here and decide that this university is not for you. Or, you may leave with your mind already set on attending in the Fall. It is one of the many decisions you will have to make in your young lives. However, Don't be afraid to mess up. Make your mistakes. Learn. Change. That is the beauty of life. A mistake is a lesson, it is not something to regret or lament. Mistakes don't define who you are, it only adds character and helps to build up a better version of yourself! Leave here today and make your mistakes, build yourself up, and see your potential. Nevertheless, I hope that your decisions lead you to WCU!" He chuckled and the crowd cheered.

I clapped absentmindedly and looked down at the pamphlet in my hands. I had circled some information on their degree program. My mom was already packing up her stuff, looking ready to high-tail it out of the crowd while my father sat there watching me gently. I could feel his eyes on me and I quickly stood up when the crowd was dismissed.

"Let get out of here," I muttered and made my way through the crowd with my parents following behind. Potential. Opportunity. Challenges. Mistakes. I had potential, I knew that. It only took me a while to get my head out of my ass and take some of the many opportunities that were thrown my way. I was a good student, smart, and I liked to learn. I always wanted to go back to school but soon after my high school graduation everything kind of fell to shit.

That was a challenge, for sure. It took me a while to get back up on my feet and thankfully my parents helped as much as I let them. I didn't want them codling me anymore. the sheltered me long enough and I think my mom realized their mistakes with raising me. After our chat the other day, she had opened up more and stopped hiding things from me. When I had questions, she answered me honestly.

My father, on the other hand, had been a quiet presence in my life. He never spoke up and sort of sat in the background. We had never been super close, but we used to be able to joke around and have fun together. After everything happened, he sort of just caved in on himself. I knew that it was partially my fault. I balmed him a lot for how shit things turned out to be. He probably already felt bad about how things turned out. I knew he didn't wish any harm to me, but it had happened.

Izuku was constantly on my mind. After he had evidently slept with someone else, I had a reality check. I needed to take hold of my own life and not let others control me anymore. I made my fair share of mistakes in my young life but was ready to make a change. That man's speech had me thinking. It had been two months since Izuku left and I felt his absence in my life daily.

Despite the few times I had to suffer the pain in our mate bond from more sessions of Izuku's coupling, I reminded myself that I couldn't blame him. We never defined our relationship and I was never kind to my mate. He left and had every right to leave with how I treated him. I just wished he would have let me explain myself. In the grand scheme of things, I was glad we had been separated. It hurt. But I was okay. We both needed time and the separation helped.

I was mature enough to understand that now. I was educating myself on Omegas and mateships. I knew that I didn't need to worry about Izuku breaking our bond while he was away because the bond wouldn't sever completely. I knew that I had time and that Izuku was struggling too. I couldn't say I knew what he was going through because I didn't. But I did know what he had to be enduing was a rough process. I just hoped his friends were helping him while I couldn't.

***

"Have you decided where you want to go to school?" Mom asked while setting the table for dinner. It had been a few days since we visited the campus and I did my research. The school had a great program but classes would not begin for another 5 months. I needed to apply now and get up my financial aid before the end of the month in order to be registered for the Fall semester.

"I think I am going to send in my application tonight," I grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge and moved to my chair at the table. I liked what the school offered, so why not? I needed a job sooner or later and this program was only a year long. I could graduate and get a job and then move out. Finally. I smirked and dad came down the stairs while mom took a seat.

"That's great. About time you got out of my hair, kid." She smirked and I glowered at her.

"It's not like I won't still be living at home the whole time. I will just commute to campus for class. Save money that way and shit." I muttered and she shrugged her reply.

"Damn, so close," She huffed and I rolled my eyes, ignoring her. I knew she would miss me if I lived on campus or whatnot. It made sense for me to stay living at home for another year until I graduated and found a job.

"You decided?" My dad spoke up and I glanced up at him.

"Yeah," I clipped and chugged the rest of my water before standing up and taking it to the trash bin. Dinner was served as usual and we ate in silence. Family time was tense and although mom and I had spoken more on my feelings regarding them both, my father had never made an effort to mend anything. I didn't feel it was my place to reach out to him if he wasn't meeting me halfway.

After dinner, I went to my room and finished my college application, read it over, then sent it in. I would get a notification within the next week or two regarding my results and then I had to fill out financial aid information. The school was expensive but I was sure to qualify for scholarships. I had amazing scores from high school.

A yawn snapped me out of my planning and I pushed myself away from my desk. I didn't do much nowadays other than chores around the house and hanging out with Kirishima. Jiro started to come around some more with Kirishima. I didn't see Denki -- he chose to stay away. He didn't contact me either and I felt a bit bad.

I had been cruel to him as well. But at the time I felt that I had the right to be angry. I trusted him and he broke that by trying to hurt my mate. Although I wasn't any better than him. I hurt Izuku too. Maybe I should call him?

I tug at my belt buckle and pull it from the loops before unsnapping the uncomfortable jeans I had been wearing all day. My jeans are discarded somewhere around my room followed by my shirt that I toss across the dark space. With the temperature just now beginning to rise after winter, the night air was still cold and my bed was inviting.

I flopped down and brought the covers up under my chin. I grabbed my phone from my nightstand and tapped the screen to wake it up. The first thing I notice is a text from Kirishima.

Shitty Hair: Hey man, I saw Denki today. He didn't look all that hot...

Shitty Hair: I know you don't really talk to him anymore, but it's been two months and he was your friend for a long time. I just don't want to see him get hurt.

Shitty Hair: Well, I didn't get a chance to talk to him. He looked to be in a rush somewhere.

Shitty Hair: Goodnight, bro!

I read through his texts and narrowed my eyes. Denki didn't look well? Was he sick? I knew he was an Omega for some reason all I could do was think about Izuku and how sick he looked when I first saw him. I knew Denki found his mate but had that Shinso guy rejected him?

I hesitated over the icon but swallowed my nerves and pressed down. The phone rang instantly and I turned on my side, keeping the phone clutched to my ear. It rang only three times before I heard the small click that told me Denki had answered my call.

"Denki," I spoke carefully and tensed when I heard a small noise come from the other end of the call.

"K - Katsuki," His voice was scratchy and I sat up with furrowed brows.

"Hi," I sighed and swallowed thickly. "Are you okay?" I asked, skipping the pleasantries. I knew damn well that wasn't okay. Kirishima was rarely wrong and didn't exaggerate when he saw shit. If Shitty Hair was worried then it was serious.

"Ah -- I guess," He replied and I frowned.

"What the hell do you mean by I guess?" I pressed but kept my voice even. Denki was quiet for some time but his breathing was ragged. I knew he was crying but I didn't know what to say. He was my friend for a long time and like it or not, he was part of my pack. Family.

"Hey now, talk to me. I can't help if you don't talk to me," I mumbled and turned my lamp on.

"Uh -- I -- He hates me!" Denki suddenly sobbed and my breath hitched in my throat. The Omega's cries were heartbreaking and I suddenly hated myself for leaving him alone. I knew he pretty much lived alone and his parents were never around. He was lonely and now his mate was angry with him.

"Stay on the phone, Denks. I'll be there in ten minutes," I spoke softly while his cries got louder and more pitiful. I winced at the sound and quickly redressed, grabbed my keys, and head out the door with Denki still sobbing on the phone with me.

Chapter Text

𝓘𝔃𝓾𝓴𝓾 𝓜𝓲𝓭𝓸𝓻𝓲𝔂𝓪

"Alright, Mr. Midoriya you may redress now," The doctor smiled at me and patted my knee while covering my lower half with the thin hospital gown. I smiled back weakly and sat upright, clutching the fabric over my hips while the doctor took both my skin cell swabs and blood tests back to the lab for testing.

Shoto was waiting out in the lobby while I took care of this. It wasn't as if I was nervous bout him seeing me naked -- that had already happened. It was the principle of the situation. This was personal in ways that didn't involve Shoto. Or maybe it does, considering we had sex. Either way, I wanted to be alone for the exam. He could come back in after I got the results though. 

I stepped down from the cot and grabbed my clothes from the counter. The exam consisted of an external physical followed by an internal physical. They swabbed my reproductive cells and then drew four vials of blood for testing. With how advanced medical practices are, the test results should be back soon. Now I just have to wait, and that is the hard part.

I tugged my boxers and jeans back on before slipping into my shoes. I take a seat and wait; that was all I could do. I haven't been to see a doctor in years. The closest thing I had was the university nurse who warned me constantly about this specific thing. The only issue back then was that I didn't care about what I did to my body. Now, I was scared. Maybe because I was older now and my biology was telling me that I needed to be having children.

I stood up and walked over to the full-length mirror. The walls were a light pink and posters were plastered around the walls. 

Do you think you may be pregnant? Ask us about free pregnancy testing! 

Are you or a loved one in need of baby supplies? Call this number!

I lifted my shirt and glared at my flat stomach. It would probably always be that way and I needed to come to terms with my future. The room here was an Omega's dream -- baby pink and full of maternity images. Photos of pregnant Omegas were everywhere along with an abundance of facts and statistics that reminded me of what I ought to be experiencing around this time in my life. It pained me being here in a way that I hadn't expected.

Seeing all the My body was calling out for my mate and I hated it. I hated that just being in this office had me jittery and thinking about things that I had long forgotten. I never cared about having kids -- It wasn't for me and dreaming would not help my situation. It wasn't as if I could handle raising a child now. I was still young.

I knew the results of the tests before the doctor had to tell me. My hand absentmindedly played at my exposed stomach before I let the fabric fall in place. I turned away from the mirror and went back to perch on the edge of the medical exam cot while I wait for my results.

I knew I wasn't pregnant though. Though the doctor made it clear that she would test for that as well just in case. But I knew I wasn't. I was an Omega and it was an Omegan thing I guess. We knew when we were pregnant almost automatically and our Alphas knew as well. Shoto said I wasn't pregnant and I didn't feel it, so it wasn't there.

The doctor knocked and cracked the door open to announce her presence before walking in and I stiffened up while straightening my back.

"Alright, Mr. Midoriya I have your results back. Let me pull up your chart," She sat down at the desk in the room and opened her laptop. I nervously played with the hem of my shirt while I waited. She smiled and turned to face me once everything was pulled up.

"Would you like your friend to come in now?" She asked and I remember telling her that Shoto could join me for the results so I nodded.

"Yeah," I hummed and she smiled.

"Well, good. Because he is right outside the door. Such a worrywart that one is," She giggled and went to open the door. " Come right on in and take a seat, Mr. Todoroki." She ushered him to an empty chair in the room and the Alpha glanced at me. I knew he was checking to see if I was okay, so I smiled softly at him and his lips ticked upwards while he sat.

"Okay, first thing's first. You aren't pregnant," She spoke while looking at the laptop then back to me with a smile.

"I know," I mumbled and Shoto smirked. The doctor chuckled.

"Yes, I would assume you would be the first to know but it is always good to check with a doctor," She smiled and I hummed but looked back at my lap where my hands rubbed together nervously.

"What about everything else?" Shoto asked and I looked up at him. He just shrugged at me but I knew he was only worried for me. He had been almost as nervous as I had been. I looked at the doctor who inhaled deeply and sat her laptop in her lap while turning to face me.

"Well, I am sorry to inform you that the test results did not look good. Your body is not producing the right hormones to allow your eggs to fertilize. Your womb is -- umm -- quite damaged and the cell sample we took showed low cell division, meaning your body isn't going to support a fetus. I'm sorry but from the look of things I would say that you would have an extremely difficult time getting pregnant and if you do conceive it would be highly likely for you to spontaneously abort."

"Miscarriage?" I whispered while looking down at my hands. I wasn't surprised by the results of the test. After all, I did this to myself. I knew the consequences, but I had no choice. What's done has been done.

"Yes, Sir. If you were to conceive, your body -- your womb -- would not be suitable for the fetus to attach to. You would likey miscarry early on. I'm extremely sorry, Izuku," I could hear her sorrow for me. An Omega that cannot reproduce. The one thing that Omegas are praised for in society, and I can't do it. Figures.

"It's fine. I knew this all already. Thank you for your time." I stood up and grabbed my coat before walking to the door. Shoto and the doctor both watched me as I moved. "Shoto, let's go," I yanked the door open and left. I needed some air.

"Hey, wait up," The alpha came jogging down the hall after me. However, when he caught up to me he stayed silent and just walked with me. He carried a stack of printed out papers that I assumed to be my results and possible services. But I didn't care. I was fine; I knew what to expect. Then why did my stomach roll with the thought of never having my own children?

I didn't want children right now, or ever. I might have wanted them with my soul mate, but that was a lost cause now. Without my mate, I would not want children. So, this was fine. It should be fine, but my head spun and my palms became slick with sweat. I rubbed them on my jeans while exiting the building with Shoto following behind quietly.

I stopped when I reached the parking lot and I stood there. My heart was pounding and my stomach churned with unease. This was okay; It should be okay. While standing there in the cold I could feel the alpha beside me. His warmth was there but I never felt so repulsed by his scent than I did right then. 

I felt my mouth water as my stomach flipped and before I could think to move, my body bent forward as I emptied my stomach onto the pavement. I heaved and choked as tears brimmed my eyes.

"S - Shit," I coughed and groaned when Shoto rubbed my back and asked me if I was okay. I shook him off and stood back up while wiping my mouth with the back of my hand. I didn't spare him another glace and I walked off towards the car. I wanted to go lie down. I wanted out of the cold. The Alpha's scent followed me and I frowned while my empty stomach clenched. I felt the need to heave once more but nothing would come out. I didn't want to be here.

I didn't want him. I wanted something much sweeter. I always would.

***

"Come on, Izuku. It's been over a week. I can't let you just lie in bed any longer," Shoto flicked on my lights and went to open the windows to let the cold air in, knowing that would wake me up.

"Don't open the fucking windows today!" I cursed and rolled over, shoving my face into the pillows.

"I have to. It is the only thing that gets you up these days," He sighed and opened one of them. I shivered as a burst of cold air entered my room.

"Dammit!" I hissed and pulled the covers over my head but they were ripped away quickly. I growled and sat up, shooting the Alpha a glare that he returned with narrowed eyes.

"I get it, Izuku. You're depressed and going through a lot but what kind of friend would I be if I let you starve and lie in bed all day?" He argued and I grumbled.

"A good friend," I adamantly said. however, Shoto growled and I flinched at the deep sound that had the hairs on my neck standing on end and my neck tilting from his frustration.

"No, that would make me a BAD friend, Izuku. You haven't showered in days and you barely eat unless I am forcing food down your throat. Now, do not argue with me and get your ass out of bed and into the shower. Or do I need to shower with you just to make sure you actually do it?" He said with a cocky tilt of his head, yet his eyes were narrowed and firm.

"I want you to leave me alone," I whined and shoved my face in the pillows again. I didn't care about anything. I didn't need to shower or eat. If I was asleep I didn't feel hungry or dirty.

"Remember what you told me when you came here?" Shoto ground through clenched teeth and I narrowed my eyes at him.

"What?" I sent a fake smile in his direction and he growled.

"You said I could do whatever I had to in order to make sure you were doing better. We sat at the table with your friend Mina and Shinso and you told me that I could do what was necessary to keep you on track. I have been letting you do what you wanted because I knew you are hurting right now, Izu. I really do! But I refuse to let you lie there and waste away. If you refuse to take care of yourself then so be it," He sighed heavily and I sat up with a glare.

"Why don't you just let me die already? I mean come on, just go away already and --"

"Be quiet," Shoto spat and my body froze up at the Alpha command. His voice had and pheromones had my spine tingling as my mouth shut. I wanted to scream at him for doing this but somewhere inside I knew he was scared and hurting for me.

"Get out of bed and go into the bathroom, now." He commanded and my neck tilted in submission. I hated baring my neck like that but my body moved on its own in response to the Alpha who had me under his spell. I slipped out of bed in my boxers and walked to the bathroom with Shoto following me with a slight frown on his face.

"Take your clothes off and stay put," He ordered and I did as he told me to. I pushed my boxers down and stood there while the Alpha turned his back to me and turned on the shower. He waited until the water warmed before turning back to me with a wary expression. I knew he didn't like Alpha commanding me. But I knew that he knew if he released the command I would fight this. I had no will to continue. So this would have to do.

"Get in the shower," He sighed and I moved. Stepping into the tub, Shoto gripped my arm and helped me inside without slipping. I stood under the spray while the Alpha had me wash myself a few times. He didn't watch me. He only looked every once in a while to make sure I was doing okay. 

After he deemed me clean enough, Shoto had me get out and dry off. He kept me under his command for a while, making me eat some food and drink a glass of water. He had me walk around some to keep my body moving. I wanted to cry and scream at him for this, but I knew he was trying his best to keep me alive. I just didn't want to be alive anymore.

It wasn't one thing or another that made me feel this way. It was a collection of things that lasted what felt like a lifetime. I knew, somehow I knew, that my body and brain had been altered from the trauma and medication I had pumped myself full of over the years. Shoto tried explaining it to me once we returned from seeing the doctor. But I didn't pay attention.

He told me that I was suffering because of the imbalance in my life, hormones, and cycles. The stress on my body plus the chemicals were messing with my brain and body. My heat cycles were coming irregularly and Shoto had to sedate my urges more than once. Although we tried to avoid sex, we both knew that he had to knot me at least once every heat cycle to keep my hormones in check. 

Only now Shoto had purchased knot condoms, even though I knew I wouldn't get pregnant. I had been knotted twice without protection and never once got knocked up. It wasn't going to happen. Still, the Alpha was careful when he did enter me. I knew that he didn't particularly love having sex with me, but he was an Alpha by nature and when I went into heat, his biology took over.

Afterward, he would hold me and feed me, making sure I was rested and hydrated. Then when my cycle passed, we would go about our life without mentioning it. It was awkward t first, but it became a new norm between us. He was my friend -- and that's how he would stay. We both knew that, even if the sex put quite a struggle between us somedays, it had to be done. But Shoto was selfless. He gave up a lot just to take care of me while I struggled through my depressive episodes. He held me when I cried and laughed with me on good days.

As the months passed I began having more good days than bad. My health was improving and I was gaining weight back. My body figure was filling out and I felt better. For the longest time I thought myself to be selfish, but the longer I spent with Shoto, and the longer he spent helping me recover, the more he drilled it into my head that I was NOT selfish. I have never been selfish.

I had been surviving. 

Chapter Text

𝓚𝓪𝓽𝓼𝓾𝓴𝓲 𝓑𝓪𝓴𝓾𝓰𝓸𝓾

I didn't bother letting anyone know I was leaving. It was late at night anyway and my parents were more than likely asleep. Denki lived only a few blocks away. The drive to his house would only take five minutes but I found myself rushing. Why was I nervous? The quiet hum of my car barely covered the annoying thrumming of my heart.

I hadn't spoken to Denki in months. Izuku had been gone for a while now and part of me harbored anger towards my friend. I blamed him for making things worse between Izuku and me. But in reality, things were already screwed up and even if Denki had never met my the guy, the results would have been the same.

However, things were finally beginning to fall into place with my life. Not a day goes by that I don't think about Izuku, but at least I can moe about my day without feeling my heart crack when I see a stranger with the same green hair or freckles. It was better this way, and I held out onto the hope that he would come back. There must have been a reason why he had not broken out bond. I used that as an anchor to hold me in place. It gave me some stability.

I knew little about my mate in the grand scheme of things. I only felt the attachment towards him because of our bond. Although the more time we spend apart the less I can even feel the pull. I wanted him to take this time for himself if that's what he desired. I now knew that my mate was sick and struggling. I blamed myself for that many times over the past month or so.

Maybe he would have gotten better if I had been nice to him and given things a proper chance? No, they wouldn't. There was too much damage. I knew this time apart was needed. However, it still hurt like a bitch when felt him having sex with someone else. It hurt worse knowing that it wasn't a heat-induced thing. It would happen at random times and not on a normal heat schedule at all. I don't know why I told myself that that would make me feel any less repulsed.

Izuku didn't belong to me. We shared a bond, that was all. I could not be mad at him for having relations outside of me when we never established anything between us. Dwelling on those things would get me nowhere. I had been attempting a more positive outlook on life. Courtesy of Shitty Hair. That man could find the good in any situation. He was always smiling but it rubbed off on me a little. It was a good thing.

I shut my car off once I arrived at Denki's home. Per usual, his parent's cars were gone and his vehicle remained alone in the driveway. His parents worked too damn much -- late nights and sometimes being called away overseas. The Omega was used to being alone -- and being alone and an Omega was never a good combination. My brows furrowed as I thought back to Izuku and the pain he was in. He was alone too. I didn't wish that on anyone, not even Denki.

Before I could knock on the door, it was ripped open and a body was pressed against mine. My eyes widened for a split second before I felt and heard the distressed whines and chirps from the boy latched to me. I said nothing and wrapped my arms around him, pulling him up so his feet left the floor. I walked us inside, kicking the door shut before bringing him towards his bedroom.

"No - No not my room," He croaked and I tilted my head. I didn't argue, only turned directions and moved us to one fo the many guest rooms. He was latched to me and trembling. I felt my heart squeeze and I pulled him tightly to my chest before setting him onto the bed. He reluctantly released his grip on my shirt and I tucked him under the covers before sitting down beside him.

He was pale, more so than usual. His hair was a mess and dark circles ringed his usually bright eyes. He reminded me of how I found Izuku when I had come to meet him -- to break our bond. Denki looked sick; sick and tired. He had lost some weight and I knew what was going on. How could I not know? I have lived this once before with Izuku. I somehow felt like both of their pain was somehow my fault. If I had been a better Alpha and mate then I could have protected them both. My friend and my mate would be happy. Maybe.

"Katsuki," His voice broke me out of my brooding and I snapped my attention towards his bundled-up figure. He was looking at me through tired eyes and I reached out to brush away his wild strands of hair.

"I'm so sorry, Denki," I sighed and pushed my fingers through his hair to pull it away from his face. His body trembled under my touch and I wondered if I was causing him pain by being here. I know I was cold towards him. I removed my hand and placed them in my lap.

"It's not your fault," He whispered and I shook my head. It was my fault. Somehow it was. I had a role in this mess, so did Izuku, so did Denki, and everyone else who contributed to the cluster fuck of a situation we all were in.

"Where are your parents?" I asked, knowing damn well the answer was at work. I wanted to know how long the Omega had been alone. I wanted to know why his mate was letting him suffer this way. I made the mistake of letting my mate suffer and I am dealing with the ramifications. Denki didn't deserve that.

"You know where they are. Haven't seen them in weeks," He mumbled and I frowned.

"Where's your mate?" I asked quietly but I needed to know. I needed to fix this somehow. I wanted to fix this for him.

"It doesn't matter," Denki whispered and I looked at him with a frown.

"Of course it does, Denks. It matters because you are suffering without him. Why has he left you alone like this?" I asked, my fingers curling into fists with anger. I hated myself for starting this mess. I took some deep breaths and looked over at the Omega still wrapped in blankets. His eyes were turned to the side, looking out the window. His lips turned down into a frown.

"I haven't seen him in weeks either," He stated blankly at the wall but I could see his lips quiver.

"Shit," I cursed and hung my head before something came to me. "Wait, so you've seen him again?" I asked and looked up. Denki nodded and sighed.

"He -- He came over to talk about a week after Izu -- Yeah after that happened. He found me on social media and messaged me telling me that he needed time to think about everything and that taking care of his friend was the most important thing at the moment. I couldn't really argue with that. I didn't have the right to." Denki turned to look at me and he bit down on his lip.

"Why did he come here then?" I asked softly, reaching back out to card my fingers through his hair. He closed his eyes and purred at the affection. Denki lacked affection as a child but no one understood why he was so clingy. I did. I knew he craved attention and love. the boy was neglected from all real attention from his parents and latched onto me. Everyone thought he was aver attached and needy, but he really was -- and it wasn't his fault.

"I wanted to explain things to him. I wanted to tell him that I never -- I never slept with you or anyone else. I wanted him to know that you were just my friend and that I never sought out a relationship with you. I know that you understand me, Katsuki. You've always been there for me when I had no one else. You, Jiro, and Kirishima are my real family. I couldn't help being attached to you. I'm an Omega and you're an Alpha. I latched on to you, and I know it caused issues for you and your mate. I got possessive over someone that did not belong to me. I messed up your chances with your mate, Kat. I am so sorry," He choked and I noticed tears cascading down his cheeks. I brushed them away softly.

"I don't hate you, Denki. I have done a lot of thinking and soul searching over the past months. I needed to grow up some and stop being so mad at the world. We all messed up, yeah?" I chuckled lightly and shook my head. A small twitch of the Omega's lips told me that he agreed.

"Yeah, we all fucked up," He snickered and I rolled my eyes.

"So tell me more. What happened when he got here?" I asked and his eyes darkened. I swallowed around the lump in my throat as his gaze shifted back to the wall.

"When he got here things were awkward. I didn't really know what to say. But -- But then I went into heat," He swallowed and my eyes widened. I didn't know what that meant for them both but I knew whatever happened, Denki wasn't going to share.

"I'm sorry," I sighed and he shook his head.

"Stop apologizing," He scolded and rubbed his eyes with the back of his hands.

"I can't help it. I feel like I need to say it a hundred more times," I chuckled and he smirked.

"You're an asshole," He grinned and I rolled my eyes.

"So I've been told," I hummed and smiled at him. "I am really sorry for shutting you out Denki. I just needed time and -- and it still hurts that he's gone. He's blocked me out and I can't contact him. His friends won't tell me anything, his mother won't either. I feel like a sitting duck," I chuckled and he smiled sadly at me.

"I guess we both have mate issues, huh?" He laughed darkly and I sighed. I stopped bitching about my own issues though and focused on my friend.

"Are we good?" I asked and wiped the lingering tears from his cheeks. He smiled at me and nodded.

"We're good. You're still my best friend," Denki smiled softly and I chuckled.

"Yeah, yeah. Don't let Shitty Hair hear you say that or he will fight you for the title," I grin and he smirked.

"Kiri is a big softy," He chuckled and I laughed. I missed this. I smiled and watched him get comfortable. "Well, don't just sit there all stiff. Come cuddle me, you big asshole," Denki grinned and I rolled my eyes. Deciding now wasn't the time to sass back or argue with him, I kicked off my shoes and slid under the covers before pulling him to my chest.

He sighed deeply and pressed his cool cheek to my neck while snuggling into my warmth. I held him and prayed it would heal the wounds of our friendship. I breathed him in and relaxed that parts of my life were returning to normal. Denki would always be my friend, he was just that type of guy. Loyal and dedicated. It surprised me how the guy could show such loyalty when his own parents were never around. Who taught him that? I pressed my lips to the top of his head and rested against him.

"Thank you," Denki whispered and I shook my head.

"Shut up," I teased and he chuckled but did as I said. Soon his body fell limp and little snores were slipping from his lips. I held him and let him rest, wishing that I had done this for Izuku when he needed it. I wished I would have been in a better state when my mate was right in front of me. My arms tightened around the Omega in my arms.

The months rolled by faster than I had expected. Once I made up with Denki, Jiro came back around as well. The poor girl hated confrontation and dipped once our friend group started to fall apart. I didn't blame her.

Denki began showing up at my house again along with Kirishima and Jiro. We got out of the house more often and watched movies. They helped me prepare for college as well. It was a few months before classes began, but still, I wanted to prepare. I picked up a part-time job at a hardware shop in town and began saving up for college. I was finally getting my attitude in check.

I still had my bad days but I was more prepared than before. I had my friends to support me. I didn't let them see me cry though. I hid the tears until I was alone at night when my body ached from the lingering feeling of my mate with another man. I hated how it made me feel, but I didn't hate Izuku. He was his own person and I needed to understand that whatever I hoped to have with him needed to be developed properly. The mate bond would only do so much and to be honest I didn't want the pull to be the one thing that held us together.

I wanted to fall in love with him and learn things about him that he didn't share with anyone else. I wanted to be there for him properly. I wanted him to feel safe with me and happy. Gods I wanted him to be happy. If he was happy without me, then I would let him go. But if he wanted me, or just wasn't happy, then I would continue fighting for him with the hope that this time around our reunion would be a sweet one.

Chapter Text

𝓘𝔃𝓾𝓴𝓾 𝓜𝓲𝓭𝓸𝓻𝓲𝔂𝓪

Staring down at my phone, I wondered if this was the right thing to do. It had been five months and I wasn't sure if I was ready to see him again. I was healthy, for the first time in years I wasn't sickly thin and pale. My skin held a nice color and my body had filled out some.

Living with Shoto for such a long time forced me into a recovery of sorts. Things were rough for a while, but lately, I had been fine. I didn't rely on the Alpha's weekly scenting to keep me calm and my heat hasn't shown up in over a month. I had been to the doctors regularly and they kept track of my progress.

My body still showed messed up hormone levels and reproductive damage, but I was healthy -- and that meant it was time.

The phone in my hand felt heavier than normal as I sat in my bedroom. Shoto had encouraged me to do this now that I was better. I was in a better mental state as well as physical state. My Omegan nature seemed settled more so than I have ever been used to, and I had Shoto to thank for that. As much as I hated to admit needing an Alpha, I was glad to have had him in my life these past months.

"Stop being a coward," I mumbled and unlocked the device. I had planned this for months now. I knew what I was going to do. I knew it had to be done. Call Katsuki. Have him meet us here. Break the bond. It was simple and I was okay with this plan -- mostly. Part of me would always want my mate, but I knew better now.

Scrolling through the list of blocked numbers, I instantly remembered Katsuki's. I had stared at this screen many nights. I knew it by heart. Only this time I would actually be able to press the one stupid icon that would bring back his voice. I had blocked him when I first got here, knowing that I would cave during a moment of weakness and go crawling back to him.

However, I was fine now. My head was clear for once in my life and I felt fine. An odd feeling after years of pain and discomfort. The only discomfort I felt now was the small part of my chest that nagged for my mate's presence.

"Stop stalling," I huffed while chiding myself. Slamming my thumb down on the icon, I watched his contact turn from red back to black. The little call button turned green, a tempting sight if I ever saw one. Checking the time, I wanted to make sure that whatever time it was back home would be appropriate for a phone call.

My palms were sweaty all of a sudden and I had the urge to throw my phone out the window and hide under my covers as if that would make this go away. I shook my head and sucked in a deep breath. I was an adult, dammit. I planned this phone call for months. It was simple. Call him. Give him my location. Ask to meet up. Break the bond. Got it.

I pressed the green icon and held the phone to my ear with my breath caught in my throat. It rang -- and rang -- and I waited until I was sure I would be sent to voicemail. I prepared to hang up at the sound of the automated message but instead found myself trembling when the soft click told me Katsuki had answered the call.

It was quiet.

I held my breath.

I exhaled.

The only sound, for a few seconds, was both our breathing -- until Katsuki sucked in a sharp breath and spoke.

"Deku," He sighed and I sunk my teeth into the flesh of my bottom lip to stop myself from whimpering. What was it about him that reduced me to my Omegan nature? That nickname. He hadn't used it since he was a child. That stupid nickname that was originated as a way to call me useless. However, it only made my insides twist with the familiarity of the name paired with his voice.

"Hi," I whispered, not being able to say much else. I gripped the phone tighter, my fingers flexing around the device pressed to the side of my head. I hadn't been prepared for my reaction; I thought I would have just powered through. My anger at fine him seemed to vanish with the sweetness of his voice -- and that confused me.

"Are you okay?" He finally said and I swallowed. Was I?

"Yeah," I cleared my throat. Why wasn't he yelling? I blocked him. I ran out on him. I didn't say a word to him and dipped out of his life before he even woke up. I swallowed around the lump in my throat.

"Where are you?" He asked, softly. I frowned, his tone sounding so different than I had expected. I heard the rustling of paper and drawers. He must be grabbing something to write this down with.

"Canada," I replied, still wrapping my head around what was happening. I was talking to Katsuki after almost six months of being away from him. He wasn't yelling. I wasn't crying. Okay, what?

"Shit, what are you doing in Canada, Deku?" He clicked his tongue and I smiled at the familiar sound.

"With a friend," It was the truth. However, that was not the point of my call. "I --" I began but the words seemed stuck in my mouth, heavy like lead, and bitter to the taste. I swallowed thickly.

"Yeah?" Katsuki prompted and I could hear the strain in his voice. It had changed. Or maybe I had been gone so long I forgot?

"Would you like to meet up and talk about some things?" I breathed a sigh of relief once the words left my lips.

"Yes!" He shouted and I smiled when he cleared his throat and repeated his yes with a bit more self-control. "Yes, of course. Where? When?" He rambled some and I couldn't help but chuckle while curling my fingers around the phone a little tighter as my heart thumped.

"My apartment back home. I will text you the address," I was going home. I couldn't stay with Shoto forever. He had his own life to live and I hade my friend back home. I wanted to get on with my life after this break. I would be free again and could live the rest of my life in peace. I wanted to see my mother too. I spent too much time away from her over the years and life was passing us by.

"You're coming home?" He asked with a pinch of hope coating his voice. I rolled my bottom lip between my teeth and closed my eyes. Why did he sound hopeful? I was expecting rage not kindness from the man I slept with and ditched the morning after.

"Yeah," I was coming home, but Katsuki wasn't going to be happy with what I was planning. Or maybe he would be? I had no clue.

"And -- Well -- Are you sure you're okay?" He asked again and I frowned some.

"I'm fine, Ka -- Bakugou," I swallowed and tensed when I heard his breath hitch in his throat. It was silent for a few moments but I couldn't bring myself to hang up just yet. I missed his voice. I shouldn't have missed it so much, but I had. Not a day passed by that I didn't think about and miss Katsuki. I missed the warm feeling I got when he was around. It was the mate pull, I knew that, but it was a comforting feeling. One that I wished I could have embraced, but I wasn't able to at the time.

"Okay," He finally breathed and I sighed, relaxing some when he spoke. "When?" He mumbled and I smiled bitterly to myself for this fucked up situation. I may have been a bit better now, but I still blamed myself for everything that happened between us. I never wanted to hurt him again, and if by leaving I would protect him from any kind of hurt by my hand, then so be it.

"Next Friday, noon?" I asked and he hummed.

"Four days from now? When are you getting back?" He asked, some more rustling happening in the background.

"I get back on Wednesday but need to settle in," I explained. Why? I had no idea. Maybe because I was afraid to hang up. Or did I miss his voice? I wanted him to keep talking. Shaking my head I rolled my eyes. This was not the plan. Call. Ask the question. Hang up. That was the plan.

"Well, if you need any help moving back in and stuff --" He trailed off and my lips parted in shock. What happened to him? I have never heard him speak so -- so normal before. I scoffed a bit in the back of my throat.

"You're different," I blurted out before mentally facepalming. He went quiet before sighing.

"Yeah," He replied stiffly and I blinked, my lips pulling into a frown while I listened to his breathing again.

"Umm -- Well, I will text you that address again in case you don't have it. Ah -- Yeah. Anyway, I am gonna go now," I ramble and bite the inside of my cheek.

"Yeah, sounds good. Oh and -- I'm glad you're okay, Izuku. Really."

***

The drive back home was longer then I had expected. Shoto drove, insisting that he see me get home safe. The Alpha was still in his overprotective role and I didn't blame him. The past six months had been a mess. I went from depressed, to normal, to borderline psychotic all in the span of a few months. Shoto had to keep me under his command many times just to get to me eat. At the time I hated him for it. But now, I was grateful for his kindness. It had paid off and I was better.

"I didn't forget anything, did I?" I asked for maybe the twenty-second time since we got in the car. My nerves were bothering me as we approached my street. "Maybe we should go back and double-check." I worried and Shoto laughed.

"Yeah, no. That would be another ten-hour drive back and then another ten to come here again. No thank you. If you forgot something I will ship it back."

"But --"

"Nope," Shoto grinned and I huffed, crossing my arms and sinking into the front seat as we pulled onto my street and I shut the GPS off. "You okay?" He asked and I hummed.

"I will be," I was going to be fine. I had another day before I was meeting Katsuki and Shoto was staying until then. He insisted on making sure nothing bad happened. I didn't blame him. How could I?

"Yeah, I know you will be, Izu," He patted my knee and I hummed again. As we pulled closer to my apartment complex I smiled grimly.

"I'm going to miss your flat," I grumbled when the hunk of junk apartment complex was right in front of us. Shoto's place was so nice. I had been pampered it seemed. The Alpha laughed with a shrug.

"May it's time for an upgrade?" He parked and shut the car off. I sighed while looking at the building.

"Maybe," I shrugged while stepping out of the car. I breathed a sigh of relief, stretching my arm above my body while shivering when my back popped. "Mmm," I hummed with a smile and Shoto laughed.

"Now's the fun part -- unpacking," He grinned and I instantly groaned.

"Do we have t --"

"Izuku," My head whipped around and I stumbled backward into Shoto's chest as my eyes landed on the ash-blond Alpha standing beside his car. His hands were tucked into the pockets of his jeans. A jacket left unzipped around his body. His eyes were fixed on me. When I breathed in I was hit in the face with his pheromones. Sweet and thick. Burnt sugar and smoke.

"Wha --" I breathed and Shoto tensed slightly, moving his arm to wrap around me and settle me back on my feet. I shuffled and stood upright. Katsuki made my move to come closer but his eyes shifted to Shoto and I stilled.

"What are you doing here? You're early," Shoto asked, keeping his voice even and I tensed, my back going stiff as my eyes widened at my mate, half expecting him to lash out. However, my jaw dropped when I watched emotions flick across the blond's face before he settled his gaze on me and smiled.

"Extra hands," He bit down on his lip and shrugged and my heart thudded. My lips parted in surprise. "Unpacking sucks, heh?" He smiled softly and I pinched myself. Who was this guy and where was my mate?

Chapter Text

𝓚𝓪𝓽𝓼𝓾𝓴𝓲 𝓑𝓪𝓴𝓾𝓰𝓸𝓾

"You can put those boxes in the kitchen," Izuku stated, avoiding eye contact with me still. The man with him seemed bored. He was an Alpha. I could smell it on him. But something lingered beneath his pheromones that made my nose scrunch. It's was Izuku's sweet fruit and sugar scent mixed with his.

I frowned, feeling my stomach twist at that. Even more so when Izuku brushed past me and the Alpha's scent clung to his skin making my instinct push forward -- screaming at me to grab my mate and remove that other male's scent from his body. But I didn't. I couldn't.

Instead, I carried the box that was handed to me and moved it to the small kitchen where a few other boxes were already. The box was labeled as fragile so I placed it on the counter where it wouldn't get stepped on. I wasn't sure why I was here today when I was told to be here on Friday. But when I woke up this morning I couldn't sit still. Izuku was coming home and I barely slept. I wasn't to see him.

At first, it was because I wanted to see if he was okay. My instincts had me worried about the Omega. Without my instincts, I wanted to see that he was safe and really here. I wanted to clear things up with him and know why he had left. I had not expected him to show up with another Alpha -- covered in his scent.

I was shocked and now had a permanent scowl on my face as I tried to decipher who this man was to Izuku. Everything in me wanted to either grab Izuku and leave with him or cuss this Alpha out for seemingly being too close to my mate. In the back of my mind, I wondered, was this the man that Izuku had been sleeping with?

I grimaced while remembering several times over the past five months where I had endured the pain of feeling Izuku's coupling with that man. If it was that man. Who else had been with my mate?

"Something on your mind?" The man asked and my head snapped up. The older Alpha stood at the entrance of the kitchen holding another box. He stepped inside and placed the box on the counter before leaning back against it while folding his arms across his chest. I narrowed my eyes. The first thing on my tongue was a sloo of insults that threatened to spill over. However, I swallowed them down and relaxed my face.

I had worked too hard over the past few months as getting my temper under control. I wouldn't make a fool out of myself in front of Izuku as soon as he got back.

"No," I replied and looked around. "Anything else that needs to be brought in?" I asked and moved to walk around him. However, the Alpha placed his hand out, pressing it against my chest to stop me from leaving. I tensed up and I swallowed down a growl as I locked eyes with him.

"Excuse me," I spoke, calmly while on the inside I was already slamming him into the wall. My skin pricked as I got a whiff of Izuku lingering on his skin. "You fucked my mate," I stated, voice even. It wasn't a question. I knew. Whoever this guy was, he was close to Izuku and had been close enough to him to have a lingering scent on his skin.

"Are you going to treat him any differently because of it?" The man stared at me and I narrowed my eyes. He didn't deny it, so it was true. I didn't like the nagging feeling in the pit of my stomach because of that.

"No," I swallowed and kept the growl from slipping although I was sure my pheromones were filling the air as the man kept his hand on my chest as if keeping me from leaving. Funny. "I am here to see if he is okay. Nothing more. He wanted to talk on Friday but --" I stepped back to get his hand off me and he just leaned against the wall while watching me.

"You're an Alpha. You were worried about him," The man filled in and I nodded.

"Are you both --" I trailed off and he smirked at me. That made my stomach roll.

"I think you should talk to Izuku. After all, miscommunication is what caused all this to begin with." He moved again and smiled. "There's more in the car," He tossed over his shoulder while walking out of the apartment. I stood there and took some deep breaths. My stomach was in knots and my fists were clenched by my sides. His words replayed in my head. He didn't deny it when I asked my question. Had Izuku moved on? Was he finally happy? My lips pulled down at the corners but I couldn't find myself to be mad at the situation. It didn't stop the discomfort from scraping my insides.

***

"This is Shoto, a friend from high school. He put me up for a while," Izuku said, voice even as he looked over to the Alpha. Izuku looked good and for once I was shocked at how he resembled his younger self. His cheeks were fuller, lips soft and plump. His eyes were bright and alive. There were no dark circles under them and his body had filled out. He was still small and thin but in a healthy way and I tried not to stare at him for too long -- he seemed uncomfortable around me.

"Katsuki Bakugou," I held my hand out to him, not mentioning that we had already met in the kitchen. I was just now putting a name to his face.

"I figured," He smirked and shook my hand. Izuku stood off to the side but by Shoto. He looked a bit nervous and kept glancing at me as if he expected me to lash out or something. He probably did. I couldn't blame him though -- I wanted to. I smirked while releasing his hand.

"Well, I should probably get going unless you need help with anything else," I shoved my hands into my pockets. I wanted to get away from the repulsive scent of Izuku mixed with him. The Alpha stayed quiet as I cleared my throat and went to grab my keys off the counter. I would be back on Friday and get to talk to him. I came here to see that he was okay, that's all.

"Stay," Izuku blurted and I froze. "I mean -- Umm -- Stay for dinner, you know, since you're already here. It's a long drive back, yeah?" He stammered and I wanted to smile. He sounded nervous and it was cute. I wanted to grin like an idiot that he wanted me to stay. However, it was a long drive back and I already was out later than I planned.

"I would love to. But I have an eight-hour drive back home. I just came to see if you were okay. I see you're in good hands." I smiled and swallowed how bitter those words tasted in my mouth. Izuku frowned a bit and looked down at his shoes. I grabbed my keys and headed to the door.

"Um!" Izuku spoke again, moving a step in my direction. I felt my heart thump a bit harder as I turned my head back to him.

"Everything okay?" I asked and his cheeks flushed the tiniest bit. His eyes avoiding mine while he looked over to Shoto quickly before finally meeting my gaze.

"Stay," He murmured again and I frowned. " The night, I mean. Stay the night. It's late and you shouldn't drive while tired. I -- I have a spare room if you want. I mean, you made the whole drive just to come back in two days. Y - You could just stay and we can t - talk tomorrow." He blabbed and I smiled a bit. He sounded nervous and Shoto looked a bit shocked. However, the Alpha didn't stick his nose in the conversation and stayed quiet.

"Umm -- I don't have clothes but, if it would make you feel better, I can stay," I offered a smile and the Omega blushed harder while turning on his heels quickly and walking off towards the hall.

"I'll go set up the guest room," He informed quickly before disappearing into a spare room. Shoto stood there and I tilted my head at him. He confused me, one. He was surprisingly calm with everything for someone who had been fucking my mate for the past months. If he had put some kind of claim on Izuku then why was he so calm with another Alpha around him?

"I guess I will take the sofa," Shoto hummed and went to leave the living room.

"You're not sharing a room with Izuku?" I asked, a bit more bitterly than I wished it would have been. However, the Alpha grinned at me over his shoulder and I choked back a growl at his cocky smirk.

"No, but I could if I asked," He cooed teasingly and I hissed past my teeth as my anger spiked. "Tut, tut, don't get all worked up. Izuku hates yelling," He smirked and I swallowed down my aggravation.

"All set! Umm -- hungry?" Izuku moved back into the living room and clasped his hands in front of him. I blinked over at him, my anger fading away as I took him in once more. I was so glad he was better. He seemed better, at least.

"Starved," I mutter and pull my eyes away from him. Izuku smiled and walked over to Shoto, patting his arm before slipping into the kitchen.

***

Dinner was simple but delicious. Izuku had picked up some skills in the kitchen it seemed. Shoto was quiet, all the while watching me and my every move. It was unnerving but ignored by everyone in the room. Izuku asked a few questions but was silent for the most part as well.

"I'll show you to your room," Izuku said after we finished cleaning up after dinner. Shoto plopped down on the couch and I nodded, following the greenette as he walked ahead of me. His hair was longer, I noticed. He also swayed his hips while walking and I had to force myself not to stare at the seductive canter. I thought he had been attractive before. Now he was downright alluring. his body had some more meat and his hips were curvy with nice thighs -- and that ass.

"Here we are," I blinked and swallowed down my thoughts. Izuku held open a door and I stepped in. It was pretty empty but that was expected. It was a guest room.

"Thanks," I leaned against the wall and he fidgeted some while looking at me.

"I don't have anything that would fit you to sleep in. I hope that's alright. I put a towel in the bathroom if you want to shower," He mumbled and I smiled.

"Thank you. I will be fine for the night, Izuku," I smirked when he ducked his head to hide the blush. I wanted to reach out and touch the tinted flesh and feel how soft his skin looked to be. I pushed my fingers into my pockets to stop myself.

"Umm -- I guess that's it then. Goodnight," The Omega whispered and gave a soft smile before turning back to the door. My chest tightened and I swallowed.

"Hey," Izuku stopped and turned back to look at me with slightly wider eyes than before. Did he look almost -- hopeful? I shook my head and smirked while taking a few steps closer to him. He didn't back away or startle. I just watched as his lips parted and the tips of his ears turned red.

"Yeah?" He breathed and I stopped right in front of him. I could practically taste his breath as he looked at me. Those deep green eyes were wide while darting around my face, curiously. I sighed and almost shivered when his scent lingered. I hated how it was tainted by the other man's pheromones.

"Nothin', don't worry about it," I smirked and took one more step before wrapping my arms around the shorter male. He gasped but didn't fight the hug. That had shocked me, but I was glad. I shivered when his warmth seeped through the fabric of my shirt and I wound my arms around his hips, pulling him tighter for a few seconds before letting him go.

He stood there dazed for a moment and I smiled, letting my fingers trail over his cheek and running my thumb along his bottom lip. He sucked in a sharp breath and I smiled at him. I stepped back just a bit, breaking the spell Izuku seemed to be under. He blinked and shook his head.

"Goodnight, Izuku. I'm glad you're back. I'm glad you're okay." I looked him over once with a soft smile. He was here. He was okay. That was enough.

Izuku quickly left and shut the door softly. The whole time his face was stained red and he didn't say another word. I stripped from my pants and shirt before climbing into the bed, ready to get some sleep so I could catch up with Izuku in the morning. I knew we had a lot to talk about, but I was okay with that. I wanted to clear things up with him. Even if the end goal isn't that he gives me another chance -- gives us another chance -- I just wanted to settle any lingering confusion and sour feelings between us.

I said that if Izuku was happy now that I would let him go. However, he seemed drawn to me as I was to him. If he were with that other Alpha then he wouldn't want to be around me so much. The mate pull wasn't that strong between us after so long apart. I knew that Izuku must not be in a relationship with the man if he was blushing under my hands.

I smirked and felt my chest tighten with nerves. It was going to be hard to fall asleep tonight. I turned over on my stomach and pressed my face into the pillows, remembering the way Izuku felt pressed against me just minutes ago. The memory of his warmth had me relaxing and closing my eyes as sleep finally took over.

Chapter Text

𝓘𝔃𝓾𝓴𝓾 𝓜𝓲𝓭𝓸𝓻𝓲𝔂𝓪

 

"I'm so tired. I'm tired of being tired, you know? Everything has been -- really crazy for so long, and I'm finally at a place in my life where I feel that I'm actually living." Katsuki sat across from me in the living room and this reminded me so much of the conversation we had many months ago. "A lot has happened -- to the both of us, and I know that you must have questions. I am prepared to answer anything you want to know. I think you deserve that from me," He did. Katsuki deserved the truth and so did I.

Taking a stabilizing breath, I crossed my ankles and looked at my mate. He sat in a chair, hair slightly mussed from sleep and lack of hair products. His face held no expression -- he just sat there and listened.

"I want to clear the air between us. I don't want to live the rest of my life not really understanding what went wrong here. It hurt -- a lot." I could feel the crease between my brows and Katsuki's lip twitched as if he wanted to speak. But he didn't, so I continued.

"It still hurts sometimes when I think about you. These past few months, they have been the most challenging days of my life. I thought for sure that this time -- this time being away from you -- that maybe it would kill me. But for some reason, I survived and I'm better now."

Katsuki tilted his head to the side only a fraction, but I caught the movement. It was endearing and I could practically see the gears turning in his head and the question forming on his tongue. I quickly explained, knowing what he must be thinking.

"Well, better is a broad statement. I am not sick and in pain every day, so I would say that would qualify as better." I added, still waiting for the Alpha to speak up. He seemed to be waiting for me to continue, face blank and serious as ever. Slightly narrowed eyes and pursed lips reminded me that this was still Katsuki. Even if he was a bit -- different now.

I swallowed around the lump in my throat and continued. "However, I don't think I can leave things the way they are between us. I think it would be best if we cleared the air and then end this for us both. I want to break our bond, formally, so we can move on and start fresh. I don't want to leave any lingering animosity between us. But," I swallowed and shifted in my seat, waiting for his reaction. "But, I want it done sooner rather than later. I am healthy now and not at risk like -- like last time. I want to end this. Today if possible," I sucked in a deep breath and let my eyes close, prepared for the snap. It never came.

"I think we should talk as well," Katsuki spoke, calm. I opened my eyes, searching his face for answered that I needed but was too shocked to ask. He shifted in his seat as well and frowned a bit in concentration. "Where do you want to begin?" He asked and lifted his head to look me in the eye.

Where did I want to begin? I hadn't planned for this conversation to begin so smoothly and without protest. Katsuki was different, and I wasn't sure if I liked this seemingly new and improved version of the hot-headed brat I watched grow up.

"I guess from the beginning. That's always a good place," I said lightly, a small smile tugging at my lips when I realized he wasn't going to lose his temper. I watched as the corners of his lips turned down and his brows furrowed. He shifted a bit again, letting his leg bounce while he thought.

"Why did you leave that night?" He finally asked and I bit down on my bottom lip with a sigh. "When your heat hit you -- you clung to me, begged to stay with me. You let me --" He struggled for words, reminding me so much of his younger self that I smiled a bit.

"I know, but I wasn't in my right mind, honestly," Katsuki tensed a bit at this, his lips pressing thin.

"Are you saying that I took advantage of you or some shit?" My eyes widened but I shook my head quickly.

"No, no! Not at all. If anything, it was the other way around," I whispered and he cocked his head while clicking his tongue.

"How the hell did you take advantage of me?" He scoffed, his usual snarky attitude shining through some. I kept quiet, not sure how to bring up this. Not sure if he really wanted to know. I thought about it a lot, the fact that I slept with him -- knowing that I would be leaving just hours later.

"I guess I should just suck it up and spill. You can't possibly hate me more than you have before," I scoffed and shook my head.

"I took advantage of you, yes. That night, my heat was clearing up. I could think about my actions and I could have chosen not to -- let that happen. I could have just left, but I was sick and selfish. I thought that if I slept with you that once, that you'd have a part of me forever. I had planned to leave, yes. I wanted to leave. I couldn't take the pain any longer. But there you were, in my nest and holding me -- I wanted you and I wanted you to have me," I swallowed thickly.

"Then I left while you were sleeping. So, yes -- I took advantage of you, Katsuki, and I'm so sorry." I murmured. It was quite for a few moments and I peeked at him, my curiosity getting the best of me.

His eyes were narrowed and gaze locked to the floor. His foot tapped while his bottom lip lay trapped between his teeth. He sighed and rolled his shoulders before looking up at me.

"You know, I was actually starting to kinda like you. It might have been the damn mate pull or whatever, but I liked you. It was taking me some time, and you promised me time. I had a month to figure it out but you left before I had the chance to tell you," He looked me in the eyes and I frowned.

"You liked me?" I asked, stupidly. That had caught me off guard. How could he have liked me when he was with another man just nights before?

"Yeah, is that so hard to believe?" He quipped and I huffed.

"Well, yeah," I drawled and he pinched the bridge of his nose.

"Okay, why? Why wouldn't I like you? One, you're my mate, my other half. There has to be something about you that I would like."

"You couldn't have liked me when you already had someone else," I stopped him and he looked at me with wide eyes before groaning and shaking his head.

"Seriously? I -- Ugh, damn Izuku. I didn't have anyone else. I was never with Denki. If you want specifics, I kissed him once in high school -- made out with him actually. But that was it. I never wanted to be with anyone else. I always wanted my mate, idiot," He huffed in frustration while my lips formed a small circle of shock.

"Oh," I whispered and he rolled his eyes.

"Damn, we really have fucked up, heh?" He scoffed and I nodded slowly.

"So -- that night you were at his house -- when you k - kissed me?" I started and Katsuki looked at me, sitting up straight in his seat.

"Is that what you thought, nerd? That I was out screwing someone else while working on things between us?" He looked bored with a slight tick in his jaw that reminded me how much he seemed to be holding back. I shrugged.

"At the time, yeah. I did think that. I know now that I wasn't in my right mind back then. I -- well, I have been to see some doctors while I was in Canada. They helped me get better, gave me some Omega vitamins to help stabilize my mood. Shoto helped too," I trailed off, catching myself mumbling nervously.

"It was because you were separated from me for those four years, wasn't it? That's why you were sick," He stated and I let my gaze linger on his face for a few moments longer.

"Part of it," I muttered and let a heavy sigh pass my lips. The Alpha quirked a brow in confusion. "I -- I was taking heat suppressants the whole time and it kinda messed with me in more than a few ways," I said stiffly. The topic was still a fresh wound and my heart squeezed.

"Damn," Katsuki sighed and I pulled my brows together. "I guess my old hag was right," He extended before seeing my expression and explaining. "Well, she's an Omega so she kinda fuckin' picked up on somethings when you were at the house. I noticed something off too and asked her some shit," He crossed his arms and leaned into the chair, his cheeks took a slight tint of pink. I focused and blinked to make sure I was seeing clearly.

"Didn't you know about Omegas already though? You're an Alpha. I mean, it is kind of customary that Alphas are educated about that sub-gender," I questioned him and he scoffed with a bitter smirk.

"Well, you could say that my parents didn't want me knowing much about Omegas after a certain incident," His voice was laced with venom but it wasn't aimed at me. However, I still swallowed around the sudden lump in my throat and went quiet.

I hated thinking about that and hadn't in such a long time. It had actually slipped to the back of my mind for some time. There were more pressing issues than something that happened almost five years ago.

"Shit," He huffed under his breath and stood up, making his way over to the sofa and dropping down next to me. "I didn't mean to make you feel bad," He didn't touch me although his fingers twitched as if holding back from reaching for me. I was quite still but shifted slightly, gravitating to his presence beside me.

There was something else on my mind, a flash of a memory that I had worried about over the past six months. Every now and then this memory would come crashing down on me and for some reason, it bothered me.

"How are your packmates?" Katsuki's head jerked up and I looked over, making eye-contact with him as he pressed his lips together and furrowed his brows.

"To clarify, they aren't technically packmates yet. They are just close friends. I haven't marked them as pack, only scented them," I frowned. Why hadn't he marked them yet? "They're fine I guess," He nodded to himself but his eyes darted to the side and that told me he was hiding something.

"And Denki?" I asked quietly. I remembered him finding his mate that day. Shinso was cold towards the boy but I had expected that. Shinso was dedicated to those he cares about and was loyal among other things. The Alpha was a control freak and Denki seemed to test all the things he stood for. I didn't expect him to run to the Omega considering the situation but after experiencing what it felt to be without a mate after forming the bond -- I never wanted that to happen to him.

"He's fine now," Katsuki said briefly but there was some underlying thing there that I could tell he didn't want to get into. I nodded slowly and the room went silent again for a few minutes until Katsuki groaned under his breath and scrubbed his hands over his face, drawing my attention over to him.

"Shoto -- Are you two together or some shit?" He questioned with crossed brows and thin lips. I blinked at him before my lips pulled up at the corners. A light giggle bubbled up at his flustered expression. Was that jealousy? He shot me a glare but that only caused more laughter. I placed a hand over my mouth to muffle the sound while my shoulders shook lightly.

"No -- God no, Shoto is just my friend," I explained and chuckled a bit.

"You two fucked," He stated and I chocked while widening my eyes.

"What?" I croaked in shock before remembering that he would have known from our bond and then Shoto's scent lingered on my skin and in my pheromones. "Oh," I cleared my throat and sat up straight.

"Yeah -- Oh," He drawled with narrowed eyes. I frowned and pinched the fabric of my jeans at my knees, nervous.

"We did h - have sex a few times when my heat hit. I wouldn't just s - sleep with someone if I didn't have to. I mean! I slept with you -- and I didn't need to I guess. But t - that was different. I was going into heat and because I was coming off the heat suppressants it was hitting randomly! We t - talked about it when I got there so I could get better. It didn't mean anything like t -that! I don't just have sex without emotion -- Ah -- I mean, with you it was different. We're mates and -- umm -- Just know I didn't want him like that. I even asked him not to k - knot me because I didn't really want any other Alpha's knot. But -- It happened and I really didn't want it. It felt wrong. It wasn't Katsuki and -- and I didn't like the way it -- mmph!"

"Deku," His hand clamped down over my mouth. He growled lowly and my eyes widened at him. His face was scrunched up while his eyes squeezed shut. I could hear his heart thumping irregularly behind his ribs. "I fuckin' know, Deku. I know," I swallowed behind his hand and shuddered, listening to the thrumming of his heart.

He eventually slipped his hand away from my mouth and I licked my lips nervously. "Yeah," I accepted, knowing that he knew. He had to of known and that twisted my stomach. I looked away from him.

We weren't together when it happened, so I didn't need to feel this bad over doing what I had to do to survive.

"Don't do that," Katsuki snapped and I looked up quickly at him.

"Huh?" I mumbled and he frowned.

"You were blaming yourself. You got that sour scent on you and that dumb wrinkle on your forehead," He smirked. "You don't need to blame yourself for that, idiot. It fuckin' sucked feeling my mate getting screwed by some other man but I know what you were going through now. It -- It kind of put things into perspective for me. I started to educate myself more about Omegas so I could understand you and not be so angry. I shouldn't have been angry when you were suffering."

I blinked in shock at his confession. He -- He tried to understand me? My heart squeezed and warmth spread through my veins.

"I was tired of being in the dark and not understanding, Izuku. I still don't understand everything, but I'm not mad at you for some shit. You were doing what you had to so you could get better. That's what I wanted," He shrugged but I felt warm. My body fought off a shiver that his words were bringing to me. He tried, and that had my breath hitching in my throat.

"I just wanted to say how sorry I am for being such an ass to you. I was angry and confused about so much at the time. I was being torn in so many directions. I felt that damn mate pull that sucked me to you regardless of the anger and pain I held onto. I wasn't ready to let it go. I wasn't ready to let go of how much pain I held onto from all those years ago. It was stupid, and I hurt you more by doing so. I hurt you when you needed me the most -- and it sucked because you had tried so hard while dealing with being sick and imbalanced. I was too shut off to really see what you were going through, and I'm sorry for that. I told myself that I would let you be so you could heal, but I also tried to take care of myself as well. I started writing when I got upset, I asked questions and cleared up some of my confusion. I even applied for a University that I wanted to go to -- I got accepted. I wanted to better myself so when -- if -- you came back you would see that I was taking this seriously now. I want to take you seriously now."

I swallowed thickly and curled my hands into fists to stop their shaking. He was looking at me so seriously that I swore I could feel him everywhere. It was warm and heavy, the feeling swarming through the room. I hated the way my body shook from his words alone. It wasn't fair how I responded to him. I was touched by his words and my skin tingled at his proximity. This was dangerous. I didn't expect this.

"I don't think that's a good idea," I whispered breathlessly and shifted to move away from his overwhelming presence.

"I beg to differ. We are mates, Izuku. We are fucking made for one another. Sure, we had a shitty start to our story but I think you're lying to yourself." He cocked his head to the side and I shot him a glare. My lips pressed tight together.

"How am I lying to myself, Ka - Bakugou? I think I know myself pretty well," I huffed and he smirked causing my heart to stutter.

"That's how I know. Your heart jumps when I'm around. I make you nervous. You are afraid to even say my name, Izuku. Afraid it will taste too good spilling from your lips." He moved closer and I shifted, scooting away as he slid over.

"No," I argued but he chuckled at the weak tone of my voice.

"Yes, I am right. But, you're also scared of getting hurt again. We started things all wrong. We both had too much damage and when we were together it was explosive. I told myself that if you were happy without me that I would let you go. If you want to break out bond then look me in the fuckin' eye and tell me you are happy, truly happy and better that you could be with me. The real me. The better version of me," He stopped his approach when my back his the arm of the sofa and I had nowhere to run other than out of the living room.

He looked me in the eyes, half crawling on the sofa to box me in while I watched him with wide eyes.

Was I happy? Yes. Yes, I was. I was happy for once in my life and my life did not involve Katsuki. I was fine now.

Fine.

Was I fine or happy? My thoughts swirled and I lifted a trembling hand and dropped it on his chest to push him back.

"Stop," I whispered and shook my head. He was confusing me. I didn't need him to be happy but it sure felt good having him by my side. Was this the mate pull or a sign that we could be compatible?

"Answer the question," He replied and I swallowed around the lump in my throat.

"Goddamnit, Katsuki," I choked and squeezed my eyes shut. I was happy - finally after so long of being miserable. The. He shows up and turns everything upside-down again. The Alpha was like a hurricane in my life. Dangerous. Powerful. Natural.

He was exciting, but not stable. At least the version of him I once knew wasn't. However, he seemed different now and his heated stare made my knees weak. I needed to think rationally.

Parts of me begged to surge forward and crash my lips to his while another part screamed at me, telling me to leave before I get hurt again.

"Are you happy, Izuku?" Katsuki murmured and narrowed his eyes. His breath fanning my face and causing my back to press harder into the arm of the sofa.

"I'm --" I croaked and turned my head away.

"Look at me and say it. Tell me you're happy without me and I will accept the breaking of our bond. I swear it," Katsuki pledged and I slowly turned my head back to face him.

My throat went dry as his crimson spheres bore holes into my skull. He was so close and my heart thrummed rapidly behind my ribs. I wet my lips and his gave dropped to my lips before his lip curled in the softest of growls.

"Izuku," He coaxed and I trembled. I was happy. Shoto made me happy. Mina made me happy. Shinso made me happy. But this was different than what he had asked me. If I was happy then he would let me go. I had the option to be free, safe, and independent. If I was happy then he would let me go. I smiled.

"I am happy."

Chapter Text

𝓘𝔃𝓾𝓴𝓾 𝓜𝓲𝓭𝓸𝓻𝓲𝔂𝓪 (Continued)

"I am happy."

I breathed out and Katsuki's eyes narrowed I could hear his breath hitch in the back of his throat. His heart stilled for a millisecond before slamming in his chest.

"I'm happy for the first time in my life. I'm happy not being in pain and having the freedom to go out of my house without being too weak to enjoy my day. I'm happy knowing I have the option to leave you."

I shifted, my hands sliding up his arms that caged me to the sofa. His muscles tensed under my touch but I carried on dragging them up to his shoulders and then his neck. I lingered there while my mind raced.

"I am happy knowing that you tried for me. That you bettered yourself and took the time to clarify things between us. That makes me happy." I sighed and watched as his face scrunched up, most likely trying to decipher my words. My fingers brushed over the nape of his neck where his scent was strongest. I felt him shiver and smiled.

"However, I don't think I could ever be truly happy if you weren't in my life, Katsuki," I sighed and when the words left my lips, the Alpha's eyes grew wide as he searched my face for clarity.

He would find it. A weight lifted from my chest once the words were out and I smiled. I watched as his breathing picked up the slightest bit and his eyes took a certain vulnerability that had my heart clenching in my chest.

"For real?" He whispered, his tone gentle and almost child-like. A chill ran down my spine and I nodded. I was a fool for thinking I could leave my mate without a struggle, but I had known that if Katsuki was the same Alpha I left six months ago that it would have been easier.

However, he had changed.

He changed and something inside me refused to budge - refused to leave him another time. Twice had been too many. A third would make me idiotic.

"For real," I murmured and let my palms slide to his face. He surprised me, leaving into my hands with his lip tucked between his teeth. His eyes shut and a sigh left his body. "I want to start fresh and do this properly," I smiled and his eyes opened.

"Yeah, properly," He said. His voice a deep baritone that had me sinking my teeth into my bottom lip.

"But first --" He growled and slammed his mouth to mine. A surprised gasp parted my lips while my fingers pushed through the soft strands of hair at his nape. At that moment I felt the world settle and fade into the background. Sections of us both had healed separately over the past six months. But pieces remained that would never fully heal -- at least that's what I had thought. But as Katsuki's lips ran tenderly over mine and my hands gripped him almost desperately, I felt my heart throb before a warmth spread over through my limbs and a content sigh puffed between our occupied lips.

When he pulled away, I stayed still. Afraid to open my eyes and ruin the cocoon of heat and comfort that had swaddled me in those few moments. Afraid that I had made a mistake of trying again with this man. Afraid of opening my eyes and this have been another one of my realistic dreams that both haunted and soothed me over the years.

However, I gasped when a warm palm cupped my cheek and soft lips pressed to mine.

"Open your eyes," Katsuki's deep voice cooed and I hesitated for a moment before letting them flutter open.

"See? I'm still here," He smiled and I trembled.

"So am I," I whispered with a wobbly lip. I was here. Katsuki was here. Maybe this could actually work when given a fair shot. He brushed his fingers over my jaw and I shuddered. He noticed and smiled gently down at me, stroking over my cheek and tracing over every inch of my face with a delicate touch.

"Yes, you are," He finally murmured before leaning down and pressing his lips back to mine. I melted into his kiss while he sunk into me with a softness that made me tremble yet again.

Chapter Text

𝓚𝓪𝓽𝓼𝓾𝓴𝓲 𝓑𝓪𝓴𝓾𝓰𝓸𝓾

Izuku still was getting used to the fact that I wanted him, and I couldn't blame him for being cautious in some situations with me. I knew that things were up in the air between us. We were mates – we had accepted that. But now we had to work towards this new part of us. It wouldn't come easily and we'd have to work through some things. But I was willing to do that if it meant I could have Izuku.

We spent the night huddled together on the sofa. I think Izuku had not come to terms with the fact that I wasn't leaving. He clung to me carefully until he fell asleep on my chest. I barely remembered the fact that there was some other man in the house with us.

The Alpha walked by, uncaring. He glanced at mine and Izuku's display on the sofa before smirking and walking through the house and towards the guest room. I couldn't both move and wake up the peaceful looking Omega in my arms, so we slept on the sofa together. I didn't mind one bit the uncomfortable position. I was just happy to be this close to him without him pushing me away.

The morning was a whole new situation. I woke up with a blanket covering my body instead of my mate. However, after the brief panic as I untangled myself from the sheets, I realized where I was. The smell of breakfast foods carried me to the kitchen where I found Izuku quietly working over the stove. He swayed, humming something softly under his breath. I couldn't help but smile as I watched him, surprised that he hadn't realized my presence in the room.

He was dressed for the day already and the clock on the wall told me it was still morning. I didn't move from my spot. I only watched him with a soft smile on my face. I knew things were going to be new and confusing, and we had so much to talk about still. But it could wait.

"Up early again, Izu?" I tensed slightly, not having heard the other man make his way into the kitchen. Shoto looked at me for a second before brushing around me and walking over to Izuku. My mood instantly soured as he approached my startled mate who was staring at me with pink cheeks and wide eyes.

"Oh, hi guys," Izuku mumbled before shifting his eyes to Shoto for a moment. I hated seeing them together knowing what I know now. I hated smelling the man on my Omega. But I couldn't bring myself to hate the guy. He saved my mate's life and kept him safe when I failed.

"Morning," I said and walked over to Izuku who snapped his eyes back to me. His body froze while I approached. I wanted to test the waters, unsure of where we stood. So, I wrapped my arms around his small waist and dipped my head to capture his lips in a soft kiss.

He gasped but kissed back instantly, grabbing hold of my upper arms and humming softly. I pulled away after a brief second and smirked at his starstruck expression. He stared at me for a few seconds before yelping and jumping back.

"You - You can't do that!" He scolded and I chuckled softly while Shoto watched us from the dining room table with curious eyes.

"Why?" I hummed and stepped up behind him, curling my arms around his torso and pressing up behind him. He shivered and spluttered, hands shaking as he tried to flip pancakes. I grinned, this was familiar.

"Because -- I'm cooking," I chuckled and pressed my lips to the back of his neck, ignoring how his scent still lingered mixed with Shoto's. Instead, I peppered light kisses over the area I would one day mark. He faltered, hands slipping and dropping the spatula onto the counter.

"Katsuki," He whispered and I smiled. It was so nice to hear him say my name again. I knew that I might have been pushing him too far too fast though. So, I stopped and released my hold on him.

"You're right. Sorry," I hummed and backed off him so he could cool down. He seemed confused by my actions, and he watched me for a moment before going back to the pancakes.

Breakfast was great, but I spent the whole time watching Izuku. He still looked the same in a lot of ways, but he was filled out and looked less sickly and thin. He stuffed his face with pancakes and eggs while Shoto chatted with him the whole time.

It surprised me when the Alpha turned the conversation my way. Izuku froze with a forkful of eggs halfway to his mouth as he watched with shocked and wide eyes.

"I'm planning on going back home today," He started, sipping a cup of steamy tea. He looked at me with a blank expression and I stared back, half excited that he would be gone soon, half concerned why he was watching me like that.

"Yeah?" I asked, not really sure why he was addressing me when this was Izuku's house.

"I want to make sure everything is okay before I go. Izuku is always welcome at my house, so if you are just going to fuck up again then you should leave him alone and let him move on," The Alpha said steadily. Izuku spluttered on his food and quickly guzzled down some water.

"Shoto!" He gasped but I shook my head.

"It's fine, Izuku. He's just concerned," I soothed him first before turning back to Shoto. "I don't plan on fucking up. Izuku and I have a lot to talk about and work through, but if he wants me, then I am going to stay and work it out with him," I explained honestly and stared right back at the older Alpha.

"Izuku?" Shoto broke his glare at me and shifted his eyes to my mate who fiddled nervously with his fork, pushing food around his plate. "Are you going to be okay if I leave today? Are you sure about this?" He asked more seriously and I bit back a growl. I know I am not perfect, but I am doing better for Izuku's sake.

I think Izuku noticed my discomfort because he shot me a worried glance before quickly speaking up. "I'm fine, Shoto. Really. I - We - Katsuki and I talked a lot and -- I'm okay with this. I'm sure. I want to give this a real chance. I'm better, okay?" Izuku added softly at the end and Shoto's worried eyes searched his for a moment before he sighed and sat back in the chair.

"Right, okay then. Well, I will be heading out soon. If you ever need anything, you know how to get in touch," He then looked at me and gave a heavy sigh. "Take care of him," He warned and Izuku scoffed.

"I'm older than him. If anything I will be taking care of him -- again," Izuku joked and my jaw almost hit the floor. Shoto blanched before busting out laughing while my mate turned beet red and quickly stood up, rushing to the kitchen with dirty dishes and mumbling under his breath.

"I don't think I need a babysitter anymore, Izuku," I called after him while Shoto chuckled still. I laughed softly while shaking my head. A lot has changed for sure.

"I think you two will actually be good for each other once this is all settled out," He sighed out with a small smile. I thought so too, but it made it more real to hear someone say it out loud.

"I -- I wanted to say thank you," I muttered before inhaling deeply and looking him in the eyes. "Thank you, for keeping him alive. I still don't like you -- you slept with my mate, I won't ever like you. But I respect you for doing what you did. I know you have no reason to trust me, but I will take care of him," I vowed and rolled my eyes when Shoto smirked.

"I don't trust you, and I won't ever like you. You almost killed your mate and you are a selfish asshole. But -- I respect you for turning your life around," He stood up and walked around the table before patting my shoulder. I sat still and watched him walk off towards the guest room. "Don't fuck it up," He called over his shoulder before entering the room.

I sat there for a few minutes just letting everything sink in. My life had done a total 180 over the last few months and now I was sitting at the same table I sat at over half a year ago. Except for this time, my mate was healthy and I wasn't my old asshole self.

The faint scent of strawberries lingered in the background. I knew Izuku was listening in to our conversation. I could hear his breathing pick up when Shoto called me an asshole.

"You can come out now," I smirked and listened as his heart thumped faster and his bare feet padded across the floor.

"I just wanted to make sure you two didn't rip each other's throats out," Izuku muttered and slipped into the open seat to my left. I smiled at him and shook my head. My sour mood fading as he filled my vision.

"Nah," I smirked and he shot me an amused glare.

"Yeah, you thanked him," Izuku teased with a playful grin. I rolled my eyes and turned in my chair and swiftly wrapped my arms around Izuku's hips before yanking him into my lap so that he was straddling me.

"Yeah, yeah, shut up," I gruffed, cupping the back of his neck in my hand and pulling his lips down to mine. That shut him up alright. He melted into me, all signs of tensions and shock fading from his limbs as he sunk into my kiss.

We stayed that way for a while, just kissing and holding each other. Izuku didn't push me away or grow tired of my touch. If anything, he pulled closer, pushed for more, and met each of my touches with eager and willing reactions. After a moment, I eased up and ran my lips softly over his until he smiled and giggled. I smiled and ran my hands down his back before resting on his hips.

"Properly, huh?" I grin and Izuku leans back, slapping my chest once before jumping out of my lap with a fierce blush coating his cheeks. I laughed and watched him mutter under his breath and walk off to hide his embarrassment. I don't think I have smiled that much in a long time. My body was still buzzing with lovely sparks that lingered from my mate's touch. I have felt them before. Only this time, I welcomed them and craved more of his kisses and touches.

Heh, that's new.