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Letters To Kyle

Chapter Text

A/n: They are in high school in this! I also had this on one of my Wattpad accounts.

Dear Kyle,

Uh hey! I guess that's a way to start this... Uh well ya see... Jeez I don't know how to say this! Well I guess I could say it the easy way, but is anything really easy Kyle?

Guess not, huh...

Well Kyle Betsy Broflovski...

I love you.

You might be saying something about this being weird, but yeah... It's true.

I love you Kyle.

~The Boy You'll Never Love

"The fuck?" Stan questioned as he looked at the letter over my shoulder. I soon see Kenny and Cartman walk up to us.

"Mhphm." Kenny waves. Since third grade he grew out of his parka. I mean we are juniors in high school now so it's understanding. Kenny now wears an orange jacket that he sewn a hood on to, and a scarf with skinny jeans. He's gotten pretty tall. He's the tallest out of all of us... Well except for Cartman.

Stan basically wears the same clothes like he did when we were younger, except now it's clothes that fit him, and he switched his normal t-shirts for sweaters for some reason.

Me? I usually wear a white button up shirt, skinny jeans, a green sweater vest, and an orange jacket over that when I'm really cold. Still have my hat though. Believe it or not I'm actually the shortest out of us all.

I really don't like it because the others say I'm the height of a girl.

Stan is a bit taller than me, then Kenny, and then... Then Cartman. He's the one who probably changed the most. He got skinnier, he's more muscle, and he became the tallest out of us all.

"What cha got there Kahl?" Cartman snatched the letter out of my hands.

"Give it back fatass!" I try to get it back, but Cartman holds it above his head.

"Why must you keep calling me that? I ain't fat! I was just big boned, and now look at me." He smirked, and handed the paper to a passing Butters. "Butters hold this for me."

Butters looked confused, but nodded anyway. Cartman instantly looked back at us. "So what was the paper about?"

"Mphmph." Kenny mumbled something, and moved his scarf. "Whatever it is it must be important."

"Stan a little help here?" I ask in a pleading way. God I hate being so damn short.

"Kyle got a love letter." Stan took a sip of his water bottle.

Cartman started laughing. "No tell me the real reason."

"That is the real reason." I let out a sigh, and Butters look at the note.

"He's right Eric." Cartman snatched the letter from Butters. "Eric?"

"Who in their fucking mind would send Kahl a love note?" Cartman looked at the paper in confusion. "Wait your middle name is Betsy?"

"Nope!" I took the letter back. "It's actually... You know what I'm not going to tell you... I wonder who wrote this."

"An idiot?" Cartman jokes. "Look it's also a guy."

"Huh?" I looked down at the letter where Cartman was pointing. It's was sighed 'the boy you'll never love.' I blushed a little thinking. It's from a guy? The others don't know this, but I actually am gay.

"Oh la la~" Kenny jokes. "I can hear the wedding bells ring!" He laughs, and Cartman chuckles.

"Who do you think it's from?" Stan asked. "I mean there isn't that many people here that are gay... Unless you know they're in the closet."

"Got something to confess Stan?" Cartman jokes.

"No! I was just stating the facts." Stan took his books out of his locker. "We should head to class."

"Yeah." I nodded my head, and grabbed my own books. We all started walking to class. Surprisingly we all had the same classes. We walked into first period which happened to be history.

"Good morning class!" Our teacher greeted. She seems to happy with her job. Stan and Kenny pretty much think she's an alcoholic or druggy. Maybe both.

I took my seat between Stan and Kenny. "Hey Stan!" Wendy walks in, and sits on the other side of him. "What's up?"

"I uh Kyle got a love note from a guy." He quickly blabbered.

"Stan." I hissed, and he sent my an apologetic look.

"Really? Who is it from?" I just gave her the note so she could read it herself. "Cool calligraphy." She giggled a little.

I didn't take her for much of a giggler.

"Who do you think it's from?" Wendy asks me.

"Don't know, and don't really care." I shrug. Lies. I do want to know.

"Class we have a new student." Our teacher stated. Next to her was a guy with black dyed hair, blue eyes, and was dressed in a MCR t-shirt and black skinny jeans. He had a scar on his right cheek. "This is Tony Barker. Tony want to say something about yourself?"

"Fuck ya all." Tony mumbled as he walked to the only open desk.

"He seems cool." Craig smirked.

I glanced over at Tony. That's when I noticed he had a Star Of David necklace around his neck.

"He's Jewish?" I asked aloud.

"Oh just great." Cartman huffed. "Another Jew."

"Got a problem fatass?" I glared at him.

"Maybe I do." Cartman crossed his arms.

"Are they always like this?" I heard Tony ask Token who nodded.

"So class today we will be learning about the Holocaust, and the Nazis." Ms. Joy stated.

"Oh fuck." I mumbled.

Lunch Break!

"Kyle." I looked over at Stan. "Want to go to the movies after school?"

"Huh?" Kenny and Cartman stared at us. "Stan are you the one who wrote the letter?"

"No Kenny." Stan stated. "And I was going to ask you guys too."

"Sure I guess." I shrugged, and Kenny nodded.

"Buy me popcorn, and we got a deal." Cartman did finger guns.

"Yeah never do that again." I told him.

"Fuck you." Cartman fired.

"Fuck you too." I fired back.

Chapter Text

"Stan next time don't let Cartman pick the movie." I told him.

"Hey it was a good movie!" Cartman exclaimed.

"It was a movie about the holocaust!" I yelled at him.

"Exactly! So it was cool Kahl." Cartman crossed his arms.

"Stop that! That's not how you say my name." We walk to my house. "See ya Stan and Kenny. Fatass."

"I'm not fat!" Cartman grumbled. "Later Jew." He started walking off. Kenny waved goodbye, and Stan headed home.

I unlocked the front door, and walked inside. Mom and Dad were visiting some family members in New Jersey leaving my in charge of Ike. "Ike? I'm home."

"I'm in the living room." The middle schooler stated. I went into the living room to see him staring at the blank TV. "Hey Kyle."

"Ike? You okay?" I sat next to him. Ike placed his head on my shoulder. "Ike?"

"Kyle... I think I'm gay." Ike stated, and he hugged his knees.

"Huh?" I questioned.

"There's this guy in my class... I think I like him." Ike blushed. "I kept staring at him, thinking about him, and stutter when I talk to him... Well try to talk to him."

"Name?" I smirk. My little brother has a crush. Ha!

"Frikle." Ike sighed.

"Isn't that the goth kid in your class." Ike nodded. "Well just go with what your heart says," I told him as I stood up. I started walking towards the stairs. "Oh and Ike I'm going to tease the heck out of you about this."

I heard Ike groan. "Shit."

"Language!" I called after him as I went into my room. Along with me my room changed over the years. Instead of being blue it's now a light green, my GO COWS! Poster is now replaced with a band poster, and the room was filled with a few more posters.

I set my backpack next to my desk, and look at the letter from this morning. I sat at my desk. Who would write this? Who do I know that write in calligraphy?

The goths perhaps?

But it can't be any of them. They hate me. Who could it fucking be?! I heard my phone start ringing. "Hello?" No one replied. "Hello?" I asked again.

"You want to know who wrote the letter?" The person asked. Their voice was a little squeaky.

"Damian?" I asked.

I heard them clear their throat. "Sorry. Had something in my throat." They stated. This time their voice was deeper. "You want to know the person who wrote the letter?"

"Uh yeah... Who are you?" I asked as I stood up. I looked at my bedroom window to see that it was open. Is someone in my house?

"All in good time Broflovski." They told me. "Meet me at Starks Pond at 8:00pm."

"But i gotta make me and my brother dinner, and do my homework." I told them as I closed the window.

"Ugh 12:00am?" They asked.

"I'm not going to Starks Pond that late." I stated.

"Okay fine!" Their voice cracked. "10:00pm?"

"Yeah sure." They guy hung up. Should I really go? I don't even know who it is. Probably Cartman playing a prank on me.

"Kyle!" I herd Ike call for me. "Dinners done!" How long was I on the phone for?!

I went downstairs to see Ike holding Chinese take-out. Should of figured. I sighed, and took one of the to go boxes. "Chicken, rise, and egg drop soup?"

"Yep!" Ike replied. "And no I didn't get it from City Wok." He stated as he put his on the dining room table.

"Okay." I sat across from him. "How was school?"

Ike stiffened a little. "It was... Okay." He shrugged while looking at his food.

"Really?" I asked. "What happened?"

"..." He stayed silent.

"Ike?" I questioned.

"You know when I told you I liked Firkle?" I nodded. "I kissed him..."

I stopped eating. "What?"

"I kissed Firkle." He repeated. I smirked when I saw Ike's goofy grin.

"Oh I'm totally going to tease you later." I laughed, and Ike groaned.


Shit. It's so fucking cold! I rapped my self with my jacket tightly, and walked through the cold snow. I soon found myself at Starks Pond.

"Broflovski." I turned around to see someone with a trench coat. "You showed up."

"Uh yeah." I replied a little uneasy. It was the new kid.

He threw a file at my feet. I picked it up, and say pictures of different people at my locker. "Those pictures are from the school cameras, and before you ask, no I am not spying on you. I took stuff from all of the school cameras."

"Uh why? That's a little fucked up dude." I told him.

"That's classified." Tony crossed his arms. "Now do you want to find out who put that note in your locker or not? I will help on one condition."

"What is it?" I asked, and he blushed a little.

"Can you... Introduce me to your friends, and some of the other people at school?" He asked.

"Sure I guess so." I shrugged, and looked at the list of people were with the photos.

Stan Marsh

Kenny McCormick

Eric Cartman

Craig Tucker

Tweek Tweak

Token Black

Clyde Donovan

David Rodriguez

Mike McKowski

All of the names I knew. The only question is who was the person who put the letter in my locker. I looked at the pictures, but it was hard to tell who did. "So you'll help?"

"Yes I will." Tony nodded. "But only if you introduce me to your friends."

"I will... Tomorrow I will." I stated.

"Well who do you want to confront first?" He asked me in a bored tone.

"I guess Stand and Kenny." I shrugged, and closed the file.

"Okay." Tony replied. "I'll see you at the bus stop, and make a list of who you want to confront first."

I nodded, and Tony ran home. Is it a good idea to work with him? Maybe this is a dumb move...

Chapter Text

I started walking to the bus stop with Ike and Tony next to me. Ike tried to keep his distance with Tony. "So uh Tony what is your original hair color? Your hair is dyed right?"

"Yeah." He stated. "Ginger."

"You might not want to let Carman know that." I stated. If he wants to be friends with people he wouldn't want to mention that to Cartman.

"I can handle that fucker." Tony stated as he fixed his hoodie.

"Oh I like this guy." Ike smiles.

"Really Ike?" I huff. He's been hanging out with Craig's sister to much.

"Heh sorry Kyle." Ike chuckles as he scratches his neck.

"It's okay." I walked over to Stan, Kenny, and Cartman who were at the bus stop. "Hey guys."

"Oh jeez the Jews are here." Cartman crosses his arms, but is soon pinned against the bus stop poll. "The fuck?!"

"Got something against Jews?" Tony asked as he held Cartman against the poll.

"Kahl call off your watch dog!" Cartman yelled at me. Tony lets go of him right when he says that.

"I ain't his watchdog!" Tony walked back over to Ike.

The bus soon pulls up. We all get on. Kenny sat with Cartman, Ike sat with Tony, and I sat with Stan. "Hey Stan."

"Sup Kyle?" Stan asked. He was writing something, and I quickly looked at it. Homework. What was I expecting to see?

A love letter.

I heard the little voice in the back of my head, and pushed it away. "Uh Kyle?"

"Hmm?" I looked at Stan.

"You want to tell me something? You've been staring at me for a bit." He stated. "Kinda creepy." He shrugged.

"Uh it can wait for later." I explained. "You got practice this morning?"

"Yeah." Stand replied. "Got a big game against North Park this Friday." It's pretty weird how much me and the guys changed over the years. Stan plays football still. He does it for Wendy, and for his dad.

Cartman actually somehow decided to join the Model UN. I thought it was crazy and wasn't him at first until I realized he was Germany. It also makes sense now after I realized how much stuff he talked us into doing when we were younger. A boy band, the tooth fairy thing with Butters, and so much more stuff. He's good in the middle of a debate.

Kenny joined the dance club, and it was for a girl when he first started. It was the first time he actually was in love, but that all fell apart when the girl broke his heart. He found a new love though. The dance club. It changed him, but in a good way. He felt more at peace.

I joined the school newspaper. I want to get my voice out there, and I want people to learn what's happening. They need the news. Good thing Jimmy agrees with me.

"Kyle time to go!" Stan snapped me out of my thoughts. "Time for hell." We all got off of the bus.

"Unlike you I actually like school Stan." I states as we walked into the school. I headed to my locker, and a note fell out. Oh shit here we go again.

"Mhm mhpmh mhmhp mhmpm" Kenny mumbled, and we looked at him for a translation. He moved his scarf. "Kyle got another note~"

"Shut Kenny or he'll start to think it's from you." Cartman chuckled, and Kenny quickly shuts up. I slowly unfolded the note. In front of me I saw the familiar writing I saw the day before.

Dear Kyle,

I am writing this during class because I can't let you catch me putting this letter in your locker tomorrow. I'll put it into your locker before I leave school.

Anyway, as you know I love you. I know you don't love me back. You're not gay now are you, Kyle? Even if you were you would love me.

You don't notice the way I look at you. You don't notice how much I REALLY care about you. It hurts so much.

But you know what? I find peace in the rain. I find peace in the silence.

Write to you later,

The Boy You'll Never Love

"Does it say who it's from?" Stan asks.

"Same thing as yesterday." I told them. Tony looked over my shoulder. "Tony?"

"Hmm maybe we should hire Batman to figure this out." He jokes.

"Hey guys, I'll see you later. Got to get to practice." Stan glanced up from his phone.

"Kay! See ya Stan!" Kenny pats his shoulder, and starts walking to the ballet room.

I glanced at Kenny than Stan. Tony already left, class wasn't for another hour, and the only people in the hall were Cartman and I. I need to talk to Stan and Kenny. If this was a video game I would have choice bubbles above my head. One would say follow Stan. The other follow Kenny.

I decided to follow Stan. Kenny has practice before and after school so I can meet up with him later. "Stan wait up!" Stan stopped walking, and I jogged over. "I'll go with you."

"You sure? You don't have to." He stated.

"Yeah I'm sure." I told him. "I need to talk to you, and write something about football practice for the newspaper anyway."

"Okay, but you'll have to talk to me on the way there. During practice you can sit on the bleachers." He explained, and I nodded. "So what do you want to talk about?"

"Um how do I say this?" I scratch the back of my neck. "Did you write the notes?" Stan stopped walking.

He slowly looked at me. "What?"

"Did you write the letters Stan?" I asked again, and he sighed. "Is that a yes?"

"No it's Kyle." He started walking again. "And I didn't write the letters. I love Wendy, and you know that."

"I... I guess I just didn't think it through." I followed him, and looked at the floor. Or maybe I just wanted it to be him.

I heard Stan sigh again. "Look Kyle... If I didn't love Wendy, and if I did like guys I might would've been the one. But I'm not."

"I know Stan." I replied. "Just forget I said anything." I looked away from him. My cheeks heating up a little.

"I'll help you find who wrote it though." He told me, and I nodded.

"Thanks. I really need the help." I tell him.

"Anytime Kyle. We're best friends after all." He smiled as we walked outside. "By the way, why do you want to know so badly? It's just letters."

That actually is a good question... Why do I want to know. "I'm not really sure."

Stan looked at me like he was trying to find out a puzzle. He sighed, and nodded. "Alright."

After School

"Kahl!" I groaned, and looked up from my book. "Where you going?!"

"Headed to the ballet room! I need to talk to Kenny, fatass!" I called back.

"I'm not fat! I was big boned!" He yelled after me.

"Sure you were!" I looked over my shoulder when I heard a banging noise. Cartman was holding his fist, and was standing in front of a locker. He was mumbling something, and started walking away.

For some odd reason our history teacher paired us up together for a project about the Holocaust. I personally against the whole thing. Cartman was only against our teacher's pairing choice.

I walked to the ballet room seeing everyone leaving. Everyone, but Kenny. Kenny was stretching a little, and that's when I really noticed how tall he was.

He was wearing what I guess was ballet pants or leggings or whatever you call them, and a black t-shirt with a hole here and there. His blonde hair was falling in front of his eyes, and he seemed really calm. The calmest I've ever seen him. He also seemed cute.

"What do I owe the pleasure, Kyle?" I blinked out of my thoughts when I heard Kenny. He was standing now with a water bottle in his hand. "Usually I don't let people other than the dance club see my private practice. Wanna see?"

"Huh?" I questioned. I really wasn't listening.

"Watch me practice." He smirked. "Actually... You might be able to help me." He started walking over.

"What with? How can I help?" I asked him as I backed up against the now closed door.

"Dance with me." He held his hand out for me to take. "I need a partner for this."

"What?" I questioned. "Wouldn't you want a girl to help you?"

"Well normally yes, but you're already here. You are as short as most of the girls here at the school, and I don't want to track down one of my club members." He explained.

I looked at his hand he was holding out for me to take. What did he want me to do exactly? What dance? I let out a small huff, and nod. I take his hand. "Fine Kenny, but what dance?"

"The tango." He simply stated. The next thing I know he pulls me close to him, and dips me. "The dance club is putting on our own production of Chicago. I get to help out with the cell block tango part, and some other parts."

"Oh." I replied, and tried to look anywhere. Anywhere, but Kenny. He soon brings me back up, and we start dancing around the room. "Kenny can I ask you something?"

"Shoot." He instantly cringed when he said that. I wonder why. "Go on."

"Did you send those letters?" He looked at me like he was confused. "The letters that were in my locker."

"Oh. No wasn't me." He shrugged. "You're not really my type anyway."

"Excuse me?" I don't know why, but I was a little offended. "Let me guess you like your people with boobs, right"

"Wrong actually." He stated, and started laughing when he saw my reaction. "God Kyle you should see your face!"

"So you're gay?" I questioned. "Or bi?"

"Wrong and wrong again dear little Kyle." He replied. "I'm pan. Gender doesn't really matter for me. What really counts is what they're like."

"So who is your type than?" I asked a small smirk played at my lips.

"Craig." He shrugged.

"Whoa whoa whoa!" I started laughing. "As in Craig tucker? You realize he's dating Tweek right?"

"Yeah, but do you really think they will last? Besides I'd wait for him. You don't realize something... A few months ago something happened, and he... He was there for me. It happened during the summer when you, Cartman, and Stan went to that camp." He explained. "He helped me through some tough shit man."

I nodded. "Why didn't you tell me or the others?"

"Because it's in the past, and I'm not really proud of it either." Kenny crossed his arms, leaned against the wall, and looked out the window. "I'll tell you guys more about it when I'm up for it... I just need time."

I didn't know what was with me, but I hugged Kenny. He was tense at first, but relaxed. He hugged back. "Can I tell you something Kenny?"

"Go ahead." He replied.

"I'm gay." I whispered.

"So? Already knew that." He stated as he petted my hair. "I overheard you talking to yourself."

"Oh." I mumbled. If the person isn't Stan or Kenny... Who could it be?

"By the way you're stepping on my toes." Heard Kenny groan. "Kinda hurts."

"Oh shit sorry dude." I quickly moved.

Later Kenny's POV

I walked over to Starks Pond, and took a deep breath. "C-Craig! R-realy!?" I looked over to see Craig goofing off with Tweek. Looks like Craig dumped a little snow down Tweeks shirt.

"Sorry Tweek. I was just playing." He kisses Tweek's forehead which instantly heated up from Tweek's blushing.

"I-i k-know Craig." Tweek hugged him, and they walked away.

Craig looked over in my direction, and I waved. He instantly flipped me off, but smiled a genuine smile. The smile he gives Tweek and Stripe.

I'm happy he helped me this past summer.

"Kenny no!" A crash could be heard followed my an alarm. "Don't die on me Kenny!"

I quickly shook my head trying to get rid of the memory. Don't die on me Kenny.

Chapter Text

Kyle's POV

"Fatass I swear to God." I hissed. "We are not going to have Hitler seem like the good guy in this project!"

"I'm not fat you fucking Jew!" Cartman yelled at me.

"Yeah sure, but you were fat!" I fired.

"Fuck you!" He flipped me off.

"Fuck you too!" I crossed my arms. Cartman soon leaves, and I huff. I looked at my backpack to see the list of suspects. Stan and Kenny are now off of it. I should ask probably ask Token and Clyde next.

Or I could take a break from the detective work.

"Ring ring Sherlock." Someone spoke, and knocked on the doorway. I looked at the doorway to see Tony. "Ike let me in."

He walked in, and placed his hands in his pockets. "What do you want Tony?" Today he was dressed in dress pants, button up white shirt, and dress shoes. His necklace was dangling around his neck.

"Came by to ask about blondy and blacky." He shrugged.

"You mean Stan and Kenny?" He nodded. "It's not them."

"What a shame a crying shame." He mumbled. "Who ya going to ask now?" He sat in my desk chair. He spun around, and stopped at me again.

"Token and Clyde." I stated. I looked at the list of people. Stan's and Kenny's named were marked out.

"Hmm well Token is busy all week." Tony shrugged. "And Clyde is at Taco Bell right now."

I looked at him quickly. "And how do you know that?"

"I got spies everywhere." He shrugged.

"Who?" I asked really wondering who he was talking about.

"Let's just say my foster brother owes me a favor." He looked at his phone.

"Who's your foster brother?" I asked. I want to know more about Tony. He hasn't told me much.

"Enough questions for now Kyle!" He snapped. I jumped a little. "Shit sorry... I don't really like people knowing much about me..."

"Oh okay..." I trail off. "So what is Token doing all week?"

"Not sure, but if I were you, I'd better go and catch up with Clyde at Taco Bell." Tony stood up. "Who knows when he's leaving."


"Fuck he's gone." I mumbled. Tony was next to me texting someone right outside of Taco Bell. Clyde was nowhere to be scene.

"My foster bro just said he's at Starks Pond talking with Kenny." Tony stated.

"Okay. Let's go there." I started walking towards the direction of the pond. Tony jogged up next to me.

"How far is Starks Pond?" Tony asked in a bored tone. "I got a musical to see at eight."

"Wait... You watch musicals?" I chuckle not really expecting him to say that. "Someone so puck as you?"

"Yeah. You would understand it if you knew what the musical was." He smirked.

"What musical? Carrie? Wicked? Hairspray?" I called off some musicals I knew.

"No actually it's that Green Day musical." He stated, I stopped walking. He stopped when he saw I wasn't following. "What?"

"They made a fucking musical after Green Day?!" I asked. They made a musical about that band?

"Yeah... Wanna go see it? I got another ticket." I instantly shook my head yes. "Okay... By the way they got some people from here to be in it."

"Really? Like who?" I asked as we started walking again.

"Not sure." Tony shrugged. "Hope they can sing well."

"Yeah..." Tony states. "When I was younger my fourth grade class made us do a short skit on our heroes. I made one whole skit about Billie Joe Armstrong, Gerard Way, Mikey Way, and a few other people."

"Yeah I only knew who Billie Joe Armstrong is." I confessed.

"Well we got to change that. Here we are." Tony pointed at the pond. "And there's Clyde."

I looked where he was pointing, and he was right. Clyde was here talking to Kenny. "Hey Clyde!"

Clyde turned around, and saw me. He started walking over with Kenny right behind him. "Sup Kyle! And uh new kid?"

"Tony." Kenny told him. "His name is Tony."

"Uh okay? Anyway Kyle what's up?" Clyde asked, and I took out the note I found in my locker. "Huh?"

"Did you give me this?" I asked. He looked at the letter, and shook his head.

"Kyle do you really think I would write this?" Clyde asked, and instantly knew my mistake. Clyde basically liked most of the girls at our school.

"Just checking Clyde." Tony stated. "We're asking everyone that past Kyle's locker yesterday morning."

"Oh, and I'm a suspect? That makes since I'm pretty awesome, and all. Right Kenny? Kenny tell me I'm awesome. Kenny? Uh Kenny where'd you go?" Clyde looked around, and Kenny wasn't anywhere to be seen.

"Hey Clyde do you know where Token is?" I asked him.

"Yeah he's at the theatre helping his parents with some musical they're funding." Clyde shrugged. "Wait he's a suspect too?"

"Classified." Tony joked. Wait funding a musical... Is he talking about American Idiot? "Anyway thanks for the info."

"Uh yeah sure." Clyde said a little uncomfortable. From how Tony was staring him down it looked like he could murder someone. The scar on his face didn't really help much.

"Well let's go." Tony started away from the pond.

"Uh bye Clyde." I started following Tony. So it's not Stan, Kenny, or Clyde. I'm actually pretty happy that it's not Clyde.

I looked at Tony, and saw he kept glancing at his phone. "Hey Kyle? Can we stop by my house on the way over? I need to get something."

"Sure dude. I don't mind." I shrugged, and Tony nodded. I followed him until we popped up at his house. It looked pretty okay. "Nice house."

"Thanks I guess." Tony unlocked the door, and ushers me inside the house. "Take a seat. I'll be right back." He states as he runs up the stairs.

Soon a kid around Ike's age comes down the stairs. He was wearing black skinny jeans, black boots, black button up shirt, and had black hair. He was also wearing black or maybe it was dark purple lipstick. I'm guessing goth, maybe?

"Who are you?" The kid asked me.

"Uh the name is Kyle... You?" I asked him a little uncomfortable how he was glaring at me a little.

"Firkle... Firkle Smith." The kid stated. Wait I remember him! Back from fourth grade him and his goth friends told us about some cult or whatever. He's also the guy Ike likes. A smirk slowly grew on my face. "Stupid conformist." Firkle mumbled as he started walking to a bookcase.

"If anyone is a conformist it's foster bro." Tony stated as he walked back down the stairs. "I mean goths are about being individuals, and going against mainstream stuff. Most Goths wear dark clothing, never smile, and only listen to gothic music. That would make you a conformist for following the gothic crowd."

Firkle instantly shuts up. He soon huffs, and starts walking up the steps past Tony. "I hate you." He mumbled.

"Hate ya too." Tony chuckled as we walked back outside. "Goths may seem mean Kyle, but they can be the nicest people you'll ever meant. People just judge them too quickly."

"Really?" I asked as we walked in the direction of the theatre.

"Yeah... Well there are mean ones, but most are nice." He corrected. We kept walking, and Tony handed me a ticket. "Here. Your ticket for the musical."

"Thanks Tony." We walked into the theatre, and realized the musical has already started.

"I feel like a civil war, like a knife in the heart. I got an axe to grind and it's splitting my head open. No friends, no girls. I need both." A character on stage by the name of Johnny stated.

A guy soon popped up next to a microphone, and started singing St Jimmy by Green Day. It was actually pretty good until I noticed who was playing St Jimmy aka the guy singing. It was Craig fucking Tucker.

The guy playing Johnny was none other than Cartman. I mean I should expected this from him. He's from weirder stuff before, but just a few hours ago he was at my house, and here I am seeing singing and dancing.

"Hey there's Token." Tony pointed at Token who was sitting a few seats down from us. Tony stood up, and started going over to him. I followed. "Pssst Token."

Token looked over to me and Tony. "What?" He whispered back.

"Did you give this to me?" I handed him the letter. He started reading it. He looked back at me, and shook his head. He looked a little annoyed.

"No. And I told you before Kyle. I like girls." He looked back at the stage.

"Well that got us nowhere." Tony stated.

"Yeah." I agreed.

Later after the musical! (Yes it's a real one!)

I walked into my house to see Ike running down the stairs. "Save mah!" Ike said weirdly , and jumped onto me.

I almost fell, but I didn't. "Ike? What's going on?"

"A spider!" Ike shrieked. "Upstairs! Bedroom!"

"A spider is in your room?" I chuckled.

"It's his room now." Ike stated. I put Ike down, and walked up to his room. There on his bed was a big spider just simply laying on a pillow.

I called Kenny to get rid of it.

Chapter Text

Dear Kyle,

I don't know how to start this letter. You came into my life when all was dark, but you gave me the light and I found my way.

That was good I guess... I found it in a magazine, but it basically explains how I'm feeling. Everyday recently has been the worst day ever, but I'd see you smile or doing something cute and it would make everything better.

You know I love you Kyle. I just don't know how to show it. I would give you a clue of who I am, but... But I don't want you to know. I know you will be disappointed.


The Boy You'll Never Love

I looked at the new note, and mentally screamed. Who the hell is giving me these?

"NANANANANA NANANANANA BATMAN!" Tony ran down the hall to his own locker. Stan and Kenny looked confused, and Cartman was texting someone.

"Uh what's with him?" Stan asked pointing at Tony with his thumb. His head was tilted to the side like a puppy.

"Don't ask." I sighed as I put stuff in my locker.

"Oi Butters!" Cartman yelled at the blonde boy who somehow was taller than me. "Wait up!" He started running after the kid.

"What was that about?" I asked kinda confused.

"Don't ask." Kenny replied with a small smirk. I have a feeling he knows something I don't.

"So Kyle we all spending the night at your house?" Stan asked as he put his stuff in his locker.

"Uh yeah Stan. By the way I'm inviting Token, Tweek, and Clyde." I stated, and Kenny gave me a pleading look.

"What about Craig?" Stan asked, and Kenny puts an arm over Stan's shoulders.

"Yeah Kyle! What about Craig?" Kenny asked right as Craig walked past us. Craig, like everyone else, changed since fourth grade. He got his ears pierced back in seventh grade, but there's one thing that hasn't changed. "Did he just flip us off?" Yep that.

"Yep he did." I replied, and Kenny looked back at me with pleading eyes. "What?"

"Are you going to invite Craig?" Kenny asked with a wild childish smile.

"I guess so." I shrugged. Kenny did a fist bump, and Stan looked at him weirdly. He then looked at me.

"Long story." I told him, and Stan nodded. Cartman soon walked back to us almost out of breath. "Fatass?"

"I'm not... Fat." He said between deep breaths. "Do you realize how fast Butters can walk?! Anyway what were go guys talking about?"

"Staying over at Kyle's house tonight." Stan stated. "Kenny just got Kyle to agree to letting Craig come."

"Do you realize how gay that just sounded?" Cartman chuckled, and I looked at my books tuning everyone out. I felt like someone was looking at me. I looked up to see Kenny staring right at me. He's the only one who knows I'm gay. He glanced at Cartman. What is he going to do?

"How did that sound gay?" Kenny asked him.

"You know. Craig... Come.." Cartman chuckled, and I rolled my eyes.

"You have no place to talk like that." Kenny told him. "I'm the only one here that can make dirty jokes. Speaking of which I got the perfect movie to watch tonight. It's a surprise."

"Yeah yeah knowing you it's going to be bad." Cartman crossed his arms.

"We should head to class." I told them trying to change the subject. "We can't be late again."

"Correction!" Cartman chuckled. "You can't be late again Jew."

"Shut up fatass." I told him.

"I'm not fat you fucking jew!" He screeched. Yes screeched.

Time skip to lunch.

I looked around the cafeteria. Stan was busy with football, Kenny was helping some girls in the dance club, and I needed to talk to Tweek.

"C-craig?!" I turned around to see Craig hugging Tweek. Some guy was walking past them, and Craig was glaring at them.

"Hey Jew boy." Cartman stood next to me with his lunch tray. "What are you looking at? Craig?"

"Uh yeah I just heard Tweek, and I was seeing what was going on." I explained and tried to find a place to sit.

"Curiosity killed the cat Kahl." Cartman followed close behind me. "Have you seen Butters?"

"He left early." I stated as I sat down. Fatass sat across from me. "Craig said he's spending the night."

"Oh yay." Cartman rolled his eyes. "Would you rather be able to teleport or talk to the dead?"

"What type of question is that?" I asked him. He just shrugged. Cartman sure did grow up a lot. "Talk to the dead."

"I'd go with teleportation. It would be a bit annoying with the dead complaining all the time." Cartman explained as he bit into his burger. "So who do you think wrote that letter?"

"Not sure." I shrug. "Maybe David."

"Why him?" Cartman yawned a little.

"Because it's not Stan, Kenny, Token, or Clyde." I called of the names.

"Why do you even want to find out who it is?" He asked with his mouth full.

"Curiosity killed the cat." I mumbled and grimaced. Why did I want to know who it is? To prove a point? Out of curiosity? "I guess to prove a point. They say that I'll never love them. How do they even know that unless I actually know who that is?"

Cartman just stared at me, but nodded. "Alright. Can't go against that I guess." He shrugged.

I glanced away from my food, and saw Tweek leaving the cafeteria. For once Craig wasn't with him. Do I believe they could be from Tweek?

Of course not.

Was I still going to ask to double check, and ask for help to find the guy?

Of course.

"Hey I'll be right back." I stood up, and Cartman glanced at me with a piece of cheese hanging out of his mouth. He slowly nodded, and looked back at his food.

I walked out of the cafeteria clutching my messenger bag. I saw Tweek at his locker grabbing some books. His own messenger bag was hanging off his shoulder, his green button up shirt was slightly messed up, and his hair blonde was everywhere. "Hey Tweek."

"Gah! K-Kyle!? Y-you scared me!" Tweek jumped.

"Sorry. I needed to ask you something." I told him as I pulled out the letter from this morning. I glanced at Tweek to see he was standing nervously. I handed him the letter. "Did you write this? If not can you help me find the guy who did?"

Tweek looked at the letter twitching a bit. He handed the letter back after reading it. "N-no. I w-would h-help, b-but I'm b-busy."

I nodded. "Thanks anyway Tweek." Tweek nodded, and I turned around heading back to the cafeteria. On the way I saw David. "Hey David!"

"Can't talk! I'm a bit busy." He stated. "Plus if it's about the letter I didn't write it. That Tony guy already asked." He ran down the hall.

Um okay? I can already rule out that vampire kid Mike.

Chapter Text

"No Kenny!" I rolled my eyes as I heard Cartman yell. "We are not watching that."

"Aw come on." Kenny chuckles as he held up the dvd case. He suggested watching Fifty Shades Of Grey. "It's just." He took the dvd out, and placed it in the dvd player. The screen showed... "Scooby Doo 2."

"I will kill you if you try that again." Cartman glared. Kenny just rolled his eyes, and sat between me and Craig.

I was somehow able to get the popcorn bowl away from Cartman, and Stan was busy texting Wendy. Craig was basically already almost asleep, Tweek was sipping his coffee, Token was eating some candy, and Clyde... He didn't show up.


At the moment we were all in the living room. Kenny, Craig, Tweek, and I sat on the floor. Stan, Cartman, and Token sat on the coach behind us.

"This movie sucks." Cartman muttered.

"I agree." Stan states.

"But... It's one of the actual good ones." Kenny muttered.

"Name one good part." Craig told him.

"Later after Shaggy and Scooby see that guy Velma likes who was just moments before acted mean is all nice. Then Shaggy says "Hey we got to be like your personality, and split." Kenny shrugged as he glued his eyes to the TV. Everyone stayed silent. "What?" Kenny looked at us.

"Dude what the fuck?" Stan asked.

Kenny looked like he was about to answer when I saw Ike walk down the stairs. He started walking to the front door. "Ike? Where are you going?" I asked.

"Um going to a friends house." He replied.

"Do I know this friend?" I asked as I crossed my arms.

"Yes." Ike quickly replied as he walked out of the house.

"That could have gone better." I mumbled.

"It could also have gone worse." Cartman chuckled.

"Let's play truth or dare." Token suggested, and everyone looked at him. "What?"

"Truth or dare?" Stan questioned. "Isn't that like childish?"

Token shrugged. "Yeah let's play truth or dare." Kenny grinned. "Kyle truth or dare."

I thought for a moment. If I pick dare who knew what Kenny would come up with. If I chose truth same result. "Uh truth?"

"Is it true Ike has a crush on the goth kid Firkle?" Kenny asked, and I nodded.

"Gaayyyy." Cartman laughed.

"You're gay for saying that." Craig stated.

"I'm gay for saying that? Dude you actually are gay!" Cartman replied, and Craig shrugged.

"Uh Stan truth or dare?" I asked, and he shrugged.

"I guess dare." He told me.

"I dare you to..." I thought for a moment again. What could I dare him to do? "I dare you to text Wendy that you like to crossdress."

Stan groaned, but texted her anyway. Moment went by before he got a text. "She said she is okay with me borrowing her clothes." Stan mumbled. Everyone started laughing.


"Okay okay yeah it's true I USED to wet the bed." Stan stated. "Kyle truth or dare?"

"Ew gross man." I chuckled. "Truth."

"What's your sexuality?" I froze. Yes I could lie, but Kenny would know I am. I know he won't tell, but if I lie to them wouldn't I also be lying to myself? "Kyle?"

"Huh? Oh uh sorry... I'm-" I was cut off by Kenny choking. Craig quickly started patting him on the back, and Kenny coughed up a piece of popcorn.

"Thanks! Anyway Craig truth or dare?" Kenny asked.

"Oh uh truth." Craig replied.

"Did you send Kyle those love letters?" Tweek instantly looked at Craig who shook his head.

"No I didn't. I'm with Tweek, and if I wasn't he really isn't my type." Craig explained as he hugged Tweek. Cartman gagged a little, and Craig flipped him off.

"Who is your type then?" Stan asked.

"Blondes." Craig replied. I saw Kenny smile a little.

After truth or dare everyone started to fall asleep. It was around 3am when I heard someone in the kitchen. I sat up, and saw the kitchen light on. Did someone break in? That's when I noticed Cartman was gone.

I sighed, and got up. I walked into the kitchen, and saw Cartman drinking some milk. "Hey Cartman."

Cartman glanced up at me, and then at his milk. "Hey Kyle." He mumbled sadly. Did he just say my name correctly? "K-kyle." I heard Cartman's voice crack, and that's when I noticed he was crying.

"Cartman?" Walked up to him, and stood next to him. I actually was a little worried for once. "What's wrong."

"Do you think dreams come true?" He asked as he ran his fingers through his hair. "Like nightmares and stuff?"

"Well some dreams do come true if you work hard enough, but nightmares usually don't." I explained, and Cartman nodded. "Why?"

Cartman placed his cup in the sink, and was about to leave the room. He stops in the doorway. "Just a thought." He walked back into the living room.

Next Day

"Good morning South Park!" Kenny chuckled.

"Shut up."

"To early."

"Fuck off."

Different people groaned. I saw Kenny pout as he walked out of the kitchen with a plate full of pancakes. "Are those pancakes?" Cartman asked.

Kenny nodded, and everyone went into the kitchen to eat. Kenny made pancakes, Craig fell asleep, Tweek was making coffee, Stan was texting Wendy, Cartman was eating, and I was drinking some milk.

"So what are you guys doing today?" I asked. Most of them shrugged. Probably not knowing what they were going to do. Today was Saturday so school was out of the question.

"I'm forced to take Ruby to ballet practice." Craig mumbled.

Tweek nodded. "I-i h-have w-w-work."

"Got to visit some family members." Stan stated.

"Spending the day with Karen." Kenny smiled. He really cared about his sister.

"Got to go to the theater." Token shrugged.

Everyone looked at Cartman. He was still stuffing his face with pancakes. He slowly looked up at us. His mouth was full. "What?"

"What are doing today?" Stan asked.

"I don't know." He shrugged. "Probably planning some scam with Butters."

After a few hours of video games and soda everyone left. Cartman yawned a little, and walked out the front door. The others were already gone, and Cartman started walking to Butters' house. Something seemed off about him.

Little did I know the day was going to get weirder.

Chapter Text

"Hey it's Stan Marsh. I can't come to the phone right now leave a message at the beep." Beep!

"Hey Stan you forgot your backpack here." I left a quick message, and turned my phone off. I looked at the backpack, and kicked it a little. It fell on its side, and a paper fell out. Well I should probably put it back in the back.

Dear Kyle

I saw those words clearly. I picked the paper up, and saw that they were the only words on it. Does this mean Stan lied about sending the letters?

Maybe... But what about Wendy?

Ring! Ring!

I picked my phone up to see it was a call from Stan. "Hey."

"Sorry for missing your call." Stan apologized, and I looked at the paper in my hand. "So what's up?"

"You left your backpack here." I stated. "Hey uh Stan... I found something I want to talk to you about."

"Oh my God you finally did it didn't you?" Stan asked.

"Did what?" I was really confused about what he was talking about.

"You finally killed Cartman." He replied.

"Heh I wish." I chuckled. "Can you meet me at Starks Pond?"

"Is that Tony guy coming with you?" He asked calmly. "He's kinda creepy."

"No he's not." I replied.

"Okay see you there dude."

AT STARKS T- Oops I means Starks Pond...

"Stan tell me the truth. Did you write those letters?" I asked him as soon as I saw him. I handed the confused teen boy the paper I found in his backpack.

Stan looked at the paper, and soon started laughing. "Kyle this is the start of a party invite I was making." Stan explained. "And again I didn't write those letters."

"Oh..." Thank God it wasn't him. "That reminds me though we need to start planning the homecoming dance."

"Isn't Wendy and Bebe in charge of that?" Stan asked as we sat on a bench.

"They want me to do it while they work on the parade, and welcoming committee." I replied, and looked at my phone seeing a message from Ike stating he will be home late.

"Welcoming committee?" Stan has a blink look on his face. "We are going to have even more students?"

"No it's to welcome the school you guys are playing against." I looked around the area. "Riverdale right?"

"Yeah." Stan replied.

Later That Day

I sighed as Ike walked into the living room. I was sitting upside down on the couch. "You look like shit."

"Wow, nice to see you too bro." I told him sarcastically.

"You know if you have any problems you can vent out to me or your school blog app thing." Ike told me, and I sat up normally. "People usually make fake names on there, and vent out what's going on in their lives. People will give them feedback, and try to help."

"And it actually works?" Ike nodded. I took my phone out, and found the school blogging app. I quickly made an account, and saw everything that people put up on the app. I saw all their problems.

I think I might have feelings for one of my friends... I thought I was straight, but maybe I'm bi..?

Made by: BlondieGirl

I instantly thought it might be Bebe.

I saw all of the positive feedback in the comments. People encouraging her to tell her friend about her feelings, and that they wouldn't judge. I sighed as Ike left the room, and started typing on my phone.

I am a closet gay, and only one of my best friends know. I'm afraid of how others might think, and I don't know how to exactly tell them. Anytime any of my friends make gay jokes or something I die a little inside. I want to tell them, but I don't know how they will react. I know they're not homophobic, but still it scares me. I don't know what I should do. Any advice?

Made by: GayGreen

Right after I posted it I got a message. Comments. Most of which said OMG or LOL. Fuck they're not taking it seriously. What was I thinking they're just teenagers after all. I was about to get off of the app when a message popped up. A... Follower?

Here2Help has followed you

I got a follow just from that post? You gotta be kidding. I shrugged it off, and followed the person back. Instantly I got a private message from them.

Here2Help: Something on your mind?

Me: You can say that I guess.

Here2Help: If it helps you can vent out to me.

Me: I guess so, but I wouldn't know where to start.

Here2Help: Try the beginning :)

I chuckled a little when I noticed the smiley face. "What's so funny?" Ike asked as he walked back into the room looking through my backpack.

"Nothing. Why are you going through my backpack?" I asked really confused.

"Money for pizza." Ike stated, and I rolled my eyes. I looked back at my phone. Am I really about to tell a complete stranger my life story? Yes.

Me: The beginning is a bit hard to say really... I guess I always known I was gay. I just didn't want to say or admit it so I acted like I liked girls.

Here2Help: Like you are on a Ferris wheel? On moment you feel like you are on top of the world, and the next your back down?

Me: Isn't that from Love, Simon?

Here2Help: guilty. Yeah it is

Me: but that basically is how it feels. I can't believe I'm talking to a stranger about my feelings.

Here2Help: How do you know I'm a stranger? I could be in your class. And sometimes talking to a stranger about your problems are better than talking to a friend.

This person was right. How did I know if they were a stranger or not? It could be anyone. Anyone at all.

Me: Who are you?

Here2Help: Would you believe me if I told you I was Spiderman?

Me: No lol

Here2Help: Was worth a shot

Me: yeah.

Here2Help: So what else is bothering you?

Me: Well someone keeps leaving notes in my locker.

I didn't get a reply back. I wondered why. I even sent a message two hours later to see what's up. Same result. No reply.

Soon it was Monday, and I walked to the bus stop. I was still wondering why Here2Help hasn't responded. "Kyle you okay dude?"

"You look like someone pissed in your morning coffee." Kenny mumbled.

"Did Jew boy wake up on the wrong side of the bed?" Cartman chuckled.

"Shut up fatass." I hissed.

"I'm not fat you fucking Jew! In fact I am pretty build now. You have no right to call me a fucking fatass." Cartman crossed his arms. Sometimes I wished he wasn't part of the debate team.

"Really though what's wrong?" Kenny asked.

"Nothing." I mumbled. "Just had a bad few days." Along with the omg and lol comments on my post were some pretty rude and sexual comments. One of those were sent through private messaging, and ended up being a dick pic with the caption would you suck this GayGreen?

I fucking hate teenagers. When we got to school I made a beeline to my locker. Again a note was there.

Dear Kyle,

Don't try to find me please. I know the past few days you tried to find me. Hunt me down if you will. Just don't look for me!

I really do love you, but I don't think I could live with the results when you do figure out how I am. I know you won't like me. I know you won't.

Who could ever like a guy like me? Not only will you hate me because of who I am, but also because the secrets I've been keeping.

~The Boy You'll Never Love

I looked at the note, and I swear I almost cried. I must find out who this is. I walked to class early, and I heard my phone go off.

Here2Help: Sorry for the late reply. I had some family problems over the past few days.

Me: It's okay.

Students start walking into class. Stan, Kenny, and Cartman walk in. I looked at everyone who had a phone in their hand. Who could this person be?

Here2Help: So... someone is leaving notes in your locker?

Me: Yep

I hear a ding, and quickly look up. The person might in my class. I wonder who.

Here2Help: Do you have any idea who it is?

Me: No... Really though who are you?

Another ding went around the class. I noticed Cartman look at his phone. It's him?! No fucking way! It can't be him! Can it?

Here2Help: Secret Kyle. Secret

Me: You know my name?

Here2Help: Yeah, and I don't want you to find me out

My eyes widened. If this guy is the one leaving the notes, and Cartman is the one who is getting the messages... Oh shit.

Cartman is leaving me the letters?!

Chapter Text

"You fucking fatass!" I pinned Cartman against the lockers right after class. "Is this some type of joke?!"

"What the hell are you talking about jew?!" Cartman tried to push me away, but I am stronger than I look.

"Give me your phone!" I try to take his phone out of his hands, but he drops it and kicked it to Kenny. "Kenny see the last message that was sent to him."

Kenny picked up the phone. "Thanks for the great night. I'll send the money to you later." Kenny read the message. I took the phone from him, and looked at the message. He didn't even have the school blog app. So Here2Help isn't him? Oh shit.

Cartman rips the phone out of my hand. "Cartman are you a-"

"Shut up Stan." I cut the raven haired boy off. "Look Cartman I-" He cuts me off by punching me.

"Don't ever talk to me again Kyle." Cartman walked away. He said my name correctly. He must really mean it.

Stan and Kenny looked at me then Cartman. Did I just make a really big mistake? Yes. Yes I did.

Cartman's POV

You know those little things that get you down each day? I have those, but they are not so little actually.

After getting my phone back I ran down the hall, to the gym, and into the boys' locker room. I felt the tears go down my cheeks. I wiped them away as I heard footsteps. "Oh Cartman." I hugged my knees when I heard the person speak coldly.

"Go away." The person walked closer to me. The Star of David necklace hung from their pants pocket. I didn't look up to see their face. I knew who it was.

"Don't go near him again." The person kicked me, and threw fifty bucks at me. "Don't even talk to him." The person kicks me again before leaving.

I watched as their feet left the room. I picked my phone up, and put the money in my pocket. I unlocked my phone, and downloaded the school blog app again.

Username: Here2Help

Password: Kyle

I looked at my messages.

Five messages from GayGreen

One message from ProudlyPan

I sighed. I opened Kyle's messages.

GayGreen: Who are you?

GayGreen: If you're not Catman then who are you? I really want to figure you out. You're the one writing the letters right? Tell me why you think I will hate you?

Me: Sorry Kyle

I looked at Kenny's message next.

ProudlyPan: We. Need. To. Talk. NOW!

I sent him a quick message that I was going to skip the rest of the day, and go home. I turn my phone off before I could get another text.

I just want to fucking die right now.

Chapter Text

Cartman's POV

"I can't believe you made me do this Kenny." I mumbled. I planned on going home, but Kenny dragged me to our next class.

Sex Education.

"It's not that bad." Kenny smirked. He probably just want to see people make fools of themselves or be able to talk about sex at school without being in trouble.

Sex education is a good class I guess. Only one small problem. I have it with Kyle and that Tony kid. I walked into the class, and sat in the back. The only girls in the class were Wendy and Nicole so sometimes this class would be weird. Stan walked in, saw me, glared, and sat with Wendy. Butters walked in, glanced at me, and sat with Clyde. Token was with Nicole, and Kenny made a beeline to Craig.

Then Kyle walked in. Tony had his arm around Kyle's shoulders. Looked like he was comforting him I guess. I glared at Tony. He's new here, and he already is trying to win over Kyle's affection. Not cool. Not cool at all. Tony's Star of David necklace shined in the dull classroom light.

I hate this motherfucker.

Kyle looked up, and saw me. He looked down, and walked over sitting in the desk next to my own.

Stupid assigned seats.

"Sorry Cartman." Kyle whispered. Did I hear him right? Did he actually say sorry?! "Is it true though?"

"I told you not to talk to me again." I looked away from him. "Is what true?"

"You're pimping yourself out." I almost choked on my spit. What the fuck?! If this is about the text... That was fucking Tony! He sent that so Kyle wouldn't want be fucking near me. "Everyone is talking about it."

Is that why Butters seemed like he didn't want to be seen with me? "Who cares if I am or not?"

"You could get into trouble Cartman." Kyle whispered as our teacher walked in. Ms. Dill basically hated her job more than you'd think.

"Like you care." I huffed still not looking at Kyle.

"I care Eric." I felt my heart skip a beat. I wish me didn't say that.

"Listen up ya little shits." Everyone looked at Ms. Dill. "We are going to team up, and you have to basically put a condom on a banana or whatever."

"Excuse me, but what did the cashier said when you had to buy them?" A random kid asked. Pfft why would they want to know?

"He thought I might actually get laid. Like that could ever happen." Ms. Dill huffed. Everyone either laugh or chuckled. "You will be partners with the person sitting next to you."

"YES!" Everyone looked at Kenny. Craig looked confused. "I uh mean okay."

I glanced at Kyle, and he glanced at me. Tony is going to kill me after this. I'm leaving everything to... Well no one.

"So... This is kinda weird..." Kyle muttered. Ms. Dill started handing the bananas and condoms out.

"Yeah I guess so." I stared at the banana in front of me. "It's not true."


"The pimping myself out thing. It's not true." I repeated. "The text was just an asshole who likes messing with me."

"Oh." Kyle nodded as he got done putting a condom on his banana... That sounded so wrong.

"So who do you think write those letters?" I asked, and Kyle snapped his head to look at me. I shrugged wanting to know what he thought.

"I'm not sure anymore." Kyle started writing some notes that was in his textbook. "At first I was crazy enough to think it might be Stan."

"You like Stan?" Fucking say no! Please Kyle!

"No. It's just that he was the first person I thought of." I nodded. "Who do you think it is?" Me.

"No clue." I see Kenny turn in his seat to look at me. Him and Butters are the only ones who know the truth. Well besides... Tony.

"Not even one?" Kyle asked, and I shook my head. I'll never say the truth.

Chapter Text

Kyle's POV

It's lunch time, and I looked around the lunchroom. Cartman... No Eric... Cartman. Ugh I don't know anymore! Cartman was sitting alone. Kenny walks over to him, but soon sees Craig and drags him out of the room.

I haven't seen Tweek since this morning, Stan was sitting with Wendy, Butters was in the computer lab finishing a late assignment, and again Cartman was sitting alone. "Hey Kyle." Tony walks up to me. "How are you?"

"I'm fine Tony." I keep staring at Cartman as he picks at his food. Tony looks at him, and huffs. "What?" I look at him.

"He's pimping himself out Kyle." Tony says. I remember Cartman told me earlier that it's not true, but for some reason it felt like he was lying. "You can't trust him. You saw the message."

I nodded as he mentioned the text on Cartman's phone. Maybe Tony is right... "Maybe..." I looked down at my lunch.

"Come on I need to talk to Wendy and Bebe." Tony pulls me over to them and Stan. Tony holds me close, and for some reason I blush. He's to close...and smells good...

"I can't believe it." Bebe huffs. "He's pimping himself out. Can we really allow him to go to homecoming?"

"He already bought a ticket." Wendy replies. "Actually he bought two."

"I wonder why he needs two." Stan wonders.

"He'll probably forget where he puts the first one so he decided to buy another just in case. He keeps forgetting things." I state as I play with my food. Everyone looks at me. "What?"

"How do you know that? I'm also his friend, and I didn't know that." Stan states.

"Because Stan i pay more attention to things." I stated.

Tony glanced at me. I could tell something was off about him. "You going with anyone Kyle?"

"Huh?" I asked confused.

"Homecoming. You going with anyone?" Tony repeats.

I blush again. "No." I replied. "I have to go though because the school paper thing."

"And class president thing." Wendy mentioned.

"Oh shit I totally forgot about that." I replied.

"How can you forget something like that?" Stan asks.

I shrug. "A lot of stuff has been happening recently."

"FIGHT!" A random kid yelled in the cafeteria. Everyone looks at them. "A FIGHT OUTSIDE!"

Everyone runs outside to the front of the school. Craig had Kenny pinned against the wall. "Take that back!"

"I didn't say anything!" Kenny grins.

"Why the hell are you grinning!?" Craig glares at him. "What's wrong with you?!"

Everyone watched them whispering. What the fuck is going on?

Craig looks like he's about to punch him. "Go ahead Craig!" Kenny yells at him. "Punch me!"

Craig keeps glaring at him, and his fist hits starts moving toward him. It lands next to Kenny's head against a brick wall. "Leave Kenny. Leave me the fuck alone." Craig mumbles, but Kenny and I heard him.

Kenny doesn't move for a second. He soon smirks. "Sure Fucker." He walks past Craig. His shoulder hitting the raven haired boy. Craig glances at everyone. "What?!" Everyone looks away, and walks back inside.

I follow Kenny to the dance club room. He's stretching and doing some ballet warmups. "If you want to talk Kyle then talk." The blonde huffs.

"Why was Craig so mad at you?" I asked him, and he freezes. He them chuckles. "Kenny?"

"I just said the wrong thing at the wrong time." He stated. He does a few moves, and the intercom comes on.

"Excuse me students the rest of the day will be used to work either on clubs or homecoming. Goodbye." The intercom goes off.

I sit against the wall, and watch Kenny do warm ups. He's changed a bit over the years, but not as much as Cartman. I actually never noticed how graceful Kenny moves until now though. He seems to move like he's walking on air.

Like an angel falling from heaven.

Kenny walks over to a CD player. He pushes the play button, and looks at the mirrors that line on the walls. He waits for a few seconds, and a K-pop song comes on. He dances to it, and even though the song goes so quickly he still seems to move gracefully.

To be honest though I don't understand how he can like K-pop.

After he dances to a few different songs from different genres he walks over to me, sits next to me, and covers his face with a towel.

We just sit there in silence.

"Kyle." Kenny breaks the silence. "Have you ever been in love?"

"Uh no I don't believe so. Why?" I ask him confused.

"Just something has been bugging me. You know when I told you Craig was my type?" He asks taking the towel off of him, and looking at his lap. His blonde hair stuck to his forehead.

"Yeah? What about it?" I asked still confused.

"I was joking at the time... But now..." Kenny looks away from his lap, and at the door. "It just hurts knowing he'll never like me." He hugs his knees.

"Kenny I-" I get cut off when I hear Kenny sniffing. "Kenny?" I make him look at me to see him crying. "Kenny w-"

"You don't understand how much it hurts Kyle." He cries, and he hugs me. He almost curls up in a ball, but it's hard for him to do because how we are sitting. "It hurts so fucking badly! All I ever hear is how he's perfect with Tweek. How they have a perfect relationship. How they deserve each other. It hurts knowing he'll never love me let alone like me!"

I rub his back. "Kenny... I don't know what to say... Craig and Tweek they-"

"I know... They are meant to be." Kenny tries to stop crying. "I... I should just hide my feelings so he'll never know. I wouldn't want to mess up his perfect relationship."

I looked at Kenny as tears fell down his cheeks. I kept rubbing his back, and looked at the door. I saw a raven haired boy in a yellow and blue hat, blue jacket, and lip piercings looking right at us with a face of anger.

Craig fucking Tucker.

Chapter Text

Kenny calmed down after awhile, and Craig was gone. Kenny went home early, and I had to go help Wendy with the homecoming decorations. Even though the dance isn't until a few weeks we are low on people helping out so we have to work harder to make the decorations. The only people in the gym were Bebe and Wendy. Nicole already said she couldn't do it today. So did Red and a few others.

"Kyle over here!" I walk over to Wendy. "We need your help. Should the banner say 'Welcome Students' or 'Welcome Party Cows'?"

"Uh, I don't think it would be a good idea to call everyone cows even though it's our mascot." I tell her.

"Told you Bebe." Wendy turned to the blonde you rolled her eyes. "I'm going to go get some paint. Can you help Bebe with the banner?"

"Sure." I stand next to the blonde girl as she watches Wendy leave the room. I haven't really talked to Bebe that much over the years.

Bebe quickly turns to me after Wendy leaves. "You're GayGreen right?"

I freeze and almost knock over the paint we did have. I glanced at her. "Wh-what do y-you mean?"

"Oh my God it is you!" She smiles brightly. "I knew it!"

I frown, and then smirk. "Oh really, BlondieGirl?" It was Bebe's turn to freeze. "Heh knew it was you too."

Bebe looks at the banner, and sighs. "You going to keep my secret?"

"Only if you keep mine." I need to make sure no one knows I'm GayGreen. "So Wendy huh?"

Bebe blushes. "Shhh someone might here."

"Bebe we're the only ones in here." I tell her.

"No... The vamp kids hang out under the bleachers." Bebe stated. I totally forgot about them. "I'll keep your secret Kyle as long as you keep mine. Also I can give you some dirt on some people."

"What do you mean?" I asked completely confused.

"I know why Cartman got a second homecoming ticket." She replied. "I overheard him talking to himself. He's planning on taking someone. I don't know who, and why someone would after the rumors though."

"How do you know they're rumors?" I asked. "He could be pimping himself out."

"Kyle this is Cartman we're talking about. Even if he is don't you think someone would see him outside of school doing it?" Bebe questioned.

"He could be doing it in a town over." I told her.

"You really think Cartman would go to the lengths of another town just to do that?" She looked at me like she won this battle.

"You don't know him like I do." I state remembering everything he's done in the past.

Bebe just stares at me, and back at the banner. "You're right. I don't, but Kyle I don't think you know him well either."

"You've changed Bebe." I tell her.

"You have two Kyle." She fired.

"Not much." I replied.

"That's true." Bebe sees Wendy walk back in. "Hey Wendy."

"Hey, I could only find blue paint, but the art club might have some green and black. Kyle can you check? I would, but I need to do something here." Wendy tells me, and I nod.

I leave the gym, and start looking for the art room. So I was right Bebe is BlondieGirl... She likes Wendy. I kinda feel bad because Wendy is dating Stan. Eh they're probably going to break up soon like always.

I walk up the stairs to the second floor. Now where is that art class. I hear some techno music coming from one of the halls, and follow it. It was coming from the room I was looking for. I open the door to see the room empty except for one person painting with their back to be.

Black and red hair, purple boots, and black clothes. My guess is Pete the goth. "Excuse me?" Pete doesn't turn around. "Excuse me!?" I speak a little louder. Nothing.

I roll my eyes, and turn the stereo off. Pete instantly looks at me. "What conformist?"

"Got any black and green paint?" I ask, and he looks a little annoyed. "I'll take that as a yes."

I walk over to the supply closet, and look for the paint. The music comes back on, but a little more quieter. "What are you listening to?" I ask trying to break the awkwardness.

"Does it matter?" Pete asks as he starts painting again. "It's Protest by Skinny Puppy."

I nod, and grab the paint. I start to leave, but I look at Pete's painting. I notice the mixtures of red, blue, black, and light brown along with a pale yellow. "Wow."

A painting of Stan.

Pete looks at me even more annoyed than before. "What now?" He hissed.

"It's just so." How do I say that it looks better than the actual person without insulting my best friend? "Amazing. Real talent."

Pete lets out a small huff, and looks back at his painting. "Thanks I guess."

"Why Stan though?" I ask him.

"Why not." He replies, and I think for a moment.

"Good point." I turn, and start to leave.

"Conformist." I stop in my tracks. "Don't mention this to him." I smile, and nod. I headed back to the gym, and wondering what's going through that goth's mind.

When I walk into the gym I accidentally walk into someone. The pain got on both me, and the person. I look up to see the last person I was hoping for at the moment.


After everything that has happened today I don't really want to talk to him. To make matters worse I'm covered in paint.

"Come with me Kyle. I'll help you get all cleaned up." Tony smirks, and takes my hand leading me to the locker room.

Chapter Text

Kenny's POV

I left school after Kyle helped me calm down. I didn't go home. I wasn't ready. I wasn't ready to go home or really talk to anyone.

I walked to Stark's Pond. I've been going there for peace since they incident that happened this past summer. I sit on a bench remembering what exactly had happened... Or what I could remember at least.

~Flash back~

I looked down at my lap. No matter what I do I'll just come back. I'll just fucking come back. Day after day after day.

I started the engine, and started driving. I started going faster and faster and faster. I close me eyes.

Maybe this will be my last death.

I felt my body hit against the seatbelt as the car hits a tree. I knew I fucking forgot something. My head hits against the steering wheel, and the airbag comes out.

"Kenny no!" A crash could be heard followed by an alarm. "Don't die on me Kenny!" I feel someone tug on my arm, and my version starts to blur. I look at a shadow above me. I can see the outline of a person.

I just don't know who. "Who-"

"Don't talk Kenny. Don't sleep or die on me alright?" They say in a calming manner.

I nod, but what's the point? I start to black out. When I woke up I was in the hospital. A bandage was around my head, on my nose, and my left arm.

I hear the door open to see Craig Tucker. "Oh you're awake." He flips me off. Of course.

"What... What happened?" I played dumb.

"You crashed into a tree." He stated in his monotone voice.

"How did I end up here?" I asked.

"I saved you..." He trailed off as he looked away from me.

"Thanks Craig."

~End of flashback~

That's when I noticed I was crying again. He should have just left me there to rot, and come back. I hugged my knees, and looked down. "Who even fucking cares?"

"I do." I looked up to see Craig. He was avoiding eye contact with me, and his hands were in his pockets.

Kyle's POV

I walk into the locker room with Tony in front of me. He walked over to one of the showers, and started stripping.

I blushed, and he turned the shower on. "You going to shower Kyle?" Tiny asks tilting his head to one of the other showers.

"I uh in a little bit. I'm going to finish up some decorations before i do... That way I don't have to take two showers." I say nervously.

"Alright." Tony nods.

I quickly get out of the room, and sit against the gym wall. "Stupid." I mumble while blushing.

"Why yes you are Kahl." I looked up to see Cartman.

"Shut up fatass." I tell him.

"Check yourself Kahl. Check yourself." He smirked, and then it faded. "Why are you covered in paint?"

"Tony." I mumbled looking at my phone. Two messages from Here2Help and BlondieGirl.

BlondieGirl: Remember to keep my secret, and I'll help you find a boy ?

I rolled my eyes at Bebe's message. My finger hovered over Here2Help's messages. "You going to click it or not Jew boy?"

I glared at Cartman who was now sitting next to me. I looked back at my phone. It was two messages. A short one, and one that seemed to be a letter.

Here2Help: Kyle... I am the one who's been leaving the letters...

Here2Help: Kyle I'm not writing the letters to mess with you. I really do love you. I want to wake up with you every morning, and hold you every night. I can't stop thinking about you, the way you talk about something you love, and just everything about you.

I do like you. Actually no, I love you. Many times I wondered what it would feel like to hold you against me. Continuous nights I think of you. Amazing was just a word until I realized my feelings toward you. Together is what I hope we can be one day. Million thoughts of you run through my head each day. A boy and his crush... Never going to happen, right?

After all. How can you love me? I'm just a worthless faggot.

I looked at the messages, and kept reading them. I didn't know if I should cry, throw my phone from anger, or both. "Kahl?"

"Not now Cartman." I hugged my knees. They called them worthless and a faggot. If they call themselves that I wonder what they will call me. Fuck I'm most likely never going to find out who they are!

"Kyle." I feel a hand on my shoulder. "It's alright." That's when I notice I'm actually crying.

Cartman hugs me, and for once I'm happy he's near me. I wouldn't want Stan to see me like this... Or Tony. I see pictures of him in my mind smiling at me with his hand out for me to take. He seems so kind and gentle towards me, and yet... Something doesn't seem right about him.

I pull away from Cartman, and wipe my tears. "Thanks Cartman." He nods, and gets up.

"Go take a shower Kahl." He walks off, and out of the gym. He really has changed over the years.

Tony walks out of the locker rooms in his gym clothes. "You going to take a shower Kyle?"

"Oh uh yeah." I walk into the locker room as Tony leaves the gym walking outside.

I take my clothes off, and get in the shower. A lot has been happening the past few days.

I still feel some tears go down my cheeks. "Who the fuck are sending me those?" I whisper.

After I get done showering I put on my gym clothes, and go home so I can wash my paint stained clothes.

I unlock my front door, and hear strange noises coming from upstairs. "I-it hurts Ike." I stopped in my tracks. Who was that?

"Sorry Firkle." Well there goes the answer. "I'm almost done." Done with what exactly!? I walked upstairs, and heard more strange noises and a little bit of moans coming from Ike's room.

I slammed the door open to see the two middle schoolers playing Twister. "Oh hey Kyle! How was school?" Ike smiled. Firkle looked like he wanted to be anywhere, but here.

"Hell." I replied, and walked downstairs.

Chapter Text

Dear Kyle,


Only a glimpse,

Never a full show,

Your smile is brighter than the sun's early glow

Kyle I know you will never love me, but will you go to homecoming with me Friday? Meet me in the middle of the gym floor. I will explain everything to you. I love you Kyle.

~The Boy You Will Never Love

It's Tony. I know it's him. The sender actually placed their name, T-O-N-Y. I smiled a small bit. It's Tony! I don't know why I'm so happy. "As they looked into the shadows of Hell they saw the Devil himself." Cartman sling an arm onto my shoulders.

"Dude don't even joke about that." Kenny playfully glared at Cartman.

"Ugh fine," Cartman glanced at me. "Kahl I just remembered something."

"What?" I asked not really caring.

"Our World War Two project is due tomorrow." I stared at him. "What?"

"I forgotten about that." My friends stared at me with shock. "What?

"You forgot about a school project!?" Stan asked shocked. "You never do!"

"I've just had a lot on my mind." I hid the note. Now I'll have even more on my mind.

"Yeah those love letters." Stan crossed his arms.

"Wh-what about them?" I asked

"They're stupid! You're probably never going to find out who the person is anyway so why should you even care about them?! Huh!? Is it because you're gay yourself, and you hope this person isn't playing some type if trick!?" Stan fumes. His angry face slowly turns to one of concern, and regret. "Look Kyle I-"

"No Stan... Y-you're right. The letters are just stupid." I started walking past them, and out the school doors. I don't feel like attending class today.

"Shit we should go talk to him." I hear Stan tell the others.

"I don't think he wants to talk to you Stan." Kenny mumbled.

"Kyle." I hear Cartman say sadly as the doors close.

I walked all the way home, and sat on my couch. I suppose they just may have figured out my secret from how I was acting. Why does life hurt so much?

I look at the letter from this morning.

I bet it's not even from Tony. Why would he like me? Plus the first letter was placed in my locker before we even met.

"You know ditching will mess up your perfect attendance, right?" My head shots up to see Cartman. "You left the front door open Kahl. I could have been a burglar or murder."

"Wait... Your not?" I chuckled remembering stuff he's done in the past.

He sits next to me. "Stan's sorry for what he said."

"I bet he is." I hug my knees. "I wonder what made him so angry."

"Wendy broke up with him again." Cartman replied.

"Well Bebe will be happy." I mumbled.


"Uh I said, well bees will be busy." Fuck what was that?

Cartman chuckles. "Well I guess so. A lot of people have been breaking up recently."

"Who else?" I start thinking of escaping to England or Germany. Okay maybe not the latter.

"Those two goth guys Pete and Michael for one. They started dating last year, but broke up. Uh I think Nicole and Token did I'm not sure, Wendy and Stan, and yeah that's basically it." Cartman shrugged. "So when the bitch and your dad coming home?"

"Stop calling my mom a bitch Cartman." I glare.

"Jeez fine. When is Sheila and Gerald coming back?" He smirks. At least it's better than calling my mom a bitch.

I shrug. "Not sure, and to be honest I don't care. If my mom knew about the letters she'd throw a fit."

"Are you gay?" I freeze at the question.

"Excuse me?" Did I hear fatass right?

"Are you gay Kyle?" He stared at me seriously.

I blinked not knowing how to respond. I mean I am, but I'm not ready for more people to know. Especially Cartman. "Why do you want to know?"

"Because you seem colorful." He replies, and I give him a confused look. "You forgot gay means homosexual, colorful, and happy didn't you?"

Shit. I did forget the meaning of that word. "Why are you even hear fatass?"

"You seemed upset. I knew Kenny and Stan wouldn't go after you so someone had to." Cartman shrugged. "Now what do you want to do?"


Later (Cartman's POV

"Why this place?" I asked the redhead as we stood outside of an ice cream store. This was the first thing he wanted to do.

"Because it's usually crowded after school." Kyle walked into the place, and I followed. "What do you want?"

"I guess cookie dough. Two scoops." I tell him, and look around the place. I don't think I've been in this ice cream parlor before.

"Um can I have two scoops of cookie dough, and strawberry?" Kyle asks the lady behind the counter.

"Better make the strawberry one sugar free." I tell her, and Kyle stares at me. "What?"

"You remembered I'm diabetic?" He asked with clearly fake awe, and I blush a little.

"Well yeah your mom kept bitching about it." I lied. Well not really lied. She did, but that's not why I remembered.

"Here is your ice cream." The lady handed it to us, and we left after paying.

"So what now?" I asked licking my ice cream.

"Hmm I dunno. Got any ideas?" Kyle asked looking up to me. I shrugged. I didn't follow Kyle home to make me happy. I did it for him.

"How's your brother?" I asked him.

"Pretty good actually. He came out as gay to me, and the guy he likes was at our house last night." He told me as some ice cream got on his nose.

He quickly wipes it off. "Ike's gay?"

"Got a problem with it fatass?" He questions.

I let out a sigh. "For the last time. I'm not fat. I'm okay with people being gay too." I mean I'm gay so why wouldn't I be?

"Oh my gosh! Eric Cartman?" I feel arms around me, and look down to see black curly hair. "It's me Samuel from Camp!"

Samuel? Oh shit. Memories from this past summer quickly flood my brain.

Chapter Text

Earlier that summer (Cartman's POV)

"Ugh why did we have to do this?" I complained to Stan and Kyle. Kenny wasn't able to come with us.

"You didn't have to Fatass." Kyle told me. "You wanted to be a junior camp counselor with us."

"It's stupid though." I whined.

"You're the one who's stupid." Kyle fired back.

"Guys shut up." Stan hissed as he tried to concentrate on something.

"Sorry Stan." Kyle tells him. I look around the camp. It really was stupid.

"Hey you must be the new junior camp counselors." A lady with light blue hair waved at us. "I'm Nikki."

"I'm Max, and I was tricked into this job." A man with black hair and a blue hoodie that was next to Nikki nodded.

"Anyway two of you will be in charge of two cabins while the other one will help out the camp's nurse." Nikki stated.

"Alright Marsh, Stan." Max looked at his clipboard. "You will be in charge of Cabin 17, Cartman, Eric will be in charge of Cabin 13, and Broflovski, Kyle will help our nurse."

"Hope the kids won't kill you." Nikki smiles.

"Excuse me?" Kyle questioned.

"Hey Alex get back here! Step away from the poisonous tree frog! I called dibs on it already!" Nikki ignored Kyle's question, and ran over to a ten year old boy.

"It's only two weeks right?" Kyle asked Stan.

"No all summer." He replied.

"Oh Lord."

A few days later

"Micha I told you not to touch that." I tried to get an axe away from the ten year old.

"You look like you need help." A pale girl with black curly hair, and old nerdy glasses spoke up. She looked to be about 16 or 17.

"No I got this." I stated right as the little kid let go, and ran off to their friends. "Phew I hate kids."

"You learn to love them. I'm Samuel." The 'girl' stated putting their hand out for me to shake. Except this wasn't a girl, but a boy.

"Um I'm Eric, but people call me Cartman." I tell Samuel.

"Alright Eric." Samuel smirks.

Back to the now.

(Still Cartman's POV)

The rest of those camp days were filled with moonlight swims, unnoticed kisses, and secrets.

I couldn't believe the brown eyed boy who was my first (and only) boyfriend was standing in front of me. The only boy who actually seemed to care about me. The only boy wh-

"Who's this?" Samuel looked at Kyle.

"Um my friend Kahl." I state.

"Oh yeah! I remember you talked about him." Samuel smiled as Kyle looked highly confused. "Im Samuel Eric's boy-" I quickly covered Samuel's mouth.

"Boy scout friend!" I finished.

Kyle looked confused. "Uh okay...? I'm going over there." He pointed to a bench a few yards away, and started walking away.

I looked at Samuel who glared up at me. "What are you doing here!?" I hissed. "You're supposed to be in Maine!"

"I moved here today" He crossed his arms. "I wanted to be near my boyfriend."

"Ex you mean." I told him.

"Actually no. We never officially broke up." Samuel stated.

My face went pale. "Samuel... I like someone else." I told him.

"That Kyle guy?" He questioned, and I looked away from him slowly nodding. "He seems nice, but do you really think he will like you after everything you did to him?"

I sighed. "Samuel don't you think I already know that? He most likely hates my fucking guts."

"Than why like him, and not me?" The raven haired boy asked.

"Because I love him." I replied, and felt pain go through my cheek. Samuel just hit me.

"He'll hate you asshole." He started walking away.

Kyle ran over. "Cartman! You okay?! What was that about!?"

"N-nothing..." I trailed off. "We need to work on our project... It's due tomorrow after all." Kyle nodded and we started walking to his house.

We worked on the project most of the day. When I went home I got out a pen and paper.

Dear Kyle,

I know the poem I'm about to write is from IT, but today I lack creativity to write you one of my own.

"Your hair is winter fire,

January embers,

My heart burns there too."

I hope your day is amazing. Better than mine.

~The Boy You'll Never Love

I cried remembering what Samuel said. Do you really think he will like you after everything you did to him?

Why must Samuel always be right?

Chapter Text

"Okay class write a story where the FBI agent that watches you through your character's phone falls in love with your character, and one day they bump into them not knowing they know everything about your character and they work for the FBI. Plus points if your character is a drug dealer or serial killer, and the FBI agent doesn't know it." You English teacher tells us.

I look at my paper, and then glance at Kyle. He stares at the paper blankly then starts writing. I sigh, and start writing myself. Not that many people know that I like writing. Well besides Kenny. I may not be great with talking with coming off as rude or mean, but I am a fantastic writer... Don't quote me on that.

After class was over I headed to my locker. Tonight is the dance. I let out a small sigh. Just a little longer and my secret will be revealed. Just a few more hours, and I will be rejected by the boy I love.

This fucking sucks.

"All students attending the homecoming dance please report to the gym." I hear over the PA system, and start making my way there. I looked around, and saw my friends. I walked over to them.

"Hey Cartman." Kenny moved a bit, and I sat between him and Kyle. Wendy walked into the middle of the gym.

"Hello everyone!" Wendy waved. "As you all know tonight is the dance. We will be selling tickets after school so you still have time to buy one, but also remember to vote for your Homecoming King and Queen."

I rolled my eyes. It's just going to be like how it was the last few years. Wendy is queen and Clyde is king as a joke. It's a bit annoying afterwards when Clyde gloats. Soon everyone leaves the gym, and leave school early. I walk home, and start looking for my outfit for tonight. It's not that I care about what I wear it's just if I seem like I'm trying really hard for him to except me (which I am) he may let me down nicely. Who am I kidding?

I'm screwed.

That night Kyle's POV

"Wait so you're actually going?" Ike asks me, and I nod. "Why exactly?"

I think for a moment. Am I about to come out to my brother? He trusted me and came out of the closet... So I guess so. "Ike... I'm gay, and this guy who likes me invited me to go."

I glanced at him to see him nod. "Who is it?"

"That's it. I'm not sure." I tell Ike, and hand him a stack of letters that I got. "They left these in my locker.

Ike took them from me, and started reading. "Wow sappy." He chuckled.

"Heh I guess so." I blushed a small bit.

"Oh." Ike mumbled.

"What?" I asked a little confused.

"I know who wrote these." Ike stated, and I quickly looked at him. "Kyle?"

I grab him by the shoulders. "Who wrote them Ike?"

"It wa-" My phone went off, and took my phone out.

I sigh, and answer it. "Hello?"

"Kyle! Where are you?!"

"Stan? Where are you?" I asked him confused. I heard loud music in the background. Oh shit the dance. "Nevermind I'm on my way over!" I hung up, and looked at Ike. "This conversation isn't over."

I ushered Ike out of my room, and quickly changed. I didn't realize it was time for the dance. Tonight I will find out who was leaving the letters. Ike knows who it is, but I have no idea how.

I walked downstairs to see Ike and Firkle on the living room couch watching TV. "No sex Ike!" I yell before leaving the house.

"What the fuck Kyle!?" I hear him yell after me. "I'm in middle school!"

I chuckled a little before walking to the school. I stop, and look at my car in the driveway. Maybe... Maybe I should drive this one time... I pull my car keys out of my pocket, and get in the car.

I drive to the school trying to calm my nerves. "Tonight is the night." I park my car, and walk in the school.

Kenny was at the snack table, Stan was talking with Clyde, and Cartman was nowhere to be found.

It's strange really. Car- Eric was the only one lately that would listen to me. Well besides Kenny.

Hands go over my eyes, and I feel someone behind me. "Guess who."

"Hmm it's either the cold clammy hands of death or Tony." I chuckled.

The hands move away, and I turn around to see Tony. He was staring at his hands in awe. "Are my hands really that cold?" He smiled, and looked at me. "Hey doll."

"Doll?" I questioned.

"Yeah. You remind me of a porcelain doll. So broken from the people around them, and yet you're still beautiful." Tony moved some of my hair behind my ear. "After all guys can be beautiful too, right?"

"R-right." I blushed. The sender of the letters must be him. Who else can say something so nice, and seem to mean it?

"You seemed upset. I knew Kenny and Stan wouldn't go after you so someone had to." Cartman shrugged. "Now what do you want to do?"

I blinked as I remembered what Cartman told me the other day.

"Kyle." I feel a hand on my shoulder. "It's alright." That's when I notice I'm actually crying.

Cartman hugs me, and for once I'm happy he's near me.

Another flashback.

"You may be a monster, but you're my little monster."

Another from years ago. Why am I thinking about Cartman? I look up at Tony. He smiled down at me. "Tony..."

"I love you Kyle." Tony confessed.


I look at my watch, and then at Tony. "Um sorry Tony, but I don't feel the same." I told him, and quickly walked away. Something is off about it. Or is it me? Tony usually makes my heart race, and my face flush. Heart attack perhaps? Maybe.

I remember I'm supposed to meet the sender of the letters at the center of the gym. This will prove if Tony is the sender or not. I walk to the center, and wait.

And wait...

And wait...

The final dance start. I feel someone tap my shoulder. "Kyle..." I turned around to see Cartman dressed in a red and black tux with a single carnation in his hand.

"Cartman?" I questioned as my heart quickened.

"I love you."

Chapter Text

A/N: This is going to be really short.

Did I hear Cartman right?

Did Eric Cartman just say he loved me? "What?"

"I said I love you Kyle." Cartman blushed. He fucking blushed. Then I realized something. How did I not notice it before? He's been acting strange recently and different. All of the clues were there right? Right?! "Kyle?"

"Leave me alone Cartman, and stop pulling this type of prank." I told him right before tears started falling down my cheeks. "J-just leave me th-the f-fuck alone." I told him once more before running out of the school. There's no way he was actually telling the truth.

He just had to be lying... Like always.

I didn't know where I was running to until I got there. Home... And my parents' car was in the driveway.

They're home.

Kenny's POV

I watched as Kyle ran out of the school in tears, and Cartman followed him. I let out a small sigh. Life has been shit recently, hasn't it? I looked around the room, and saw things. This I probably wouldn't see before. Bebe and Wendy dancing, Clyde and Token making-out (knew I should have spiked the punch), Stan talking to a blushing goth kid, Craig crying, an- Wait...


I walked over to him, and he was sitting against the wall. "Craig?"

"What do you want Kenny." Craig huffed as he flipped me off. I sat next to him, and handed him a tissue. "Um thanks."

"What's wrong Craig?" Craig looked around, and stood up. He motioned for me to follow him so I did. We walked out of the school, and into the parking lot to his car. he unlocked it, and the two of us got in. "Now Craig what's wrong?"

"Tweek is thinking about breaking up with me." He stated getting a beer bottle out from behind his seat. He handed it to me, and grabbed himself another one.

I was confused. "Why would Tweek want to break up with you? You're amazing." I smiled weakly.

Craig stared at me for a few moments, and let out a small sigh. He took a sip of his beer, and looked at the steering wheel. "I guess Tweek just doesn't think that anymore." I felt my heart shatter. Craig really does love Tweek, and Tweek is thinking about breaking up with him. He's thinking about destroying Craig's happiness. "Do you remember what happened this past summer?"

I nodded. I'll always remember. "Yeah, why?"

"That was a mistake. It shouldn't have happened. Not me saving you part, but... Afterwards." Craig explained as I felt my heart shatter even more. "I think I'll be done with dating for a while after Tweek..."

"I love you Craig." I told him without thinking, and I felt icy chapped lips land on my own.

Kyle's POV

I felt my heart sink into my chest. I walked into my house to see my mom yelling at Ike and Firkle. "Do you realize how shocked we were to see you two doing that?!" Mom yelled, and dad stood there awkwardly. "Ike you are not old enough to do things like that!"

"But M-" Ike got caught off when he saw me. "Hey Kyle."

Mom turned around, and hugged me tightly. "Aw I missed you so much Kyle!"

"Mom what happened? Why were you yelling at Ike?" I asked really confused. Mom rarely yells at him. It's mainly me and my friends she yells at.

"We walked into the house, and boom! There he was on the sofa kissing that book!" She pointed at Firkle. I noticed how he hid a little bit behind Ike. Not so tough now huh?

"Mom it was just one kiss! I really like Firkle! I know exactly what I'm doing, and if you don't want me to date a boy then fine! You don't want me to, but I will anyway!" Ike yelled at her, and mom looked shocked.

"Ike... You think I'm upset because he's a boy?" Ike nodded slowly a little confused about her asking. "Ike no that wasn't why I was mad. I'm just overprotective of you and your brother. I don't care if you like a guy or not as long as you're happy."

"Okay who are you, and what did you do with our mother?" Ike and I said in unison.

Mom rolled her eyes, and brought us into a group hug. She tried to get Firkle in on the hug, but he shook his head. "I got to go." He gave Ike a quick hug, and started to leave. "Bye Ike, and his family."

"Bye Georgie." Ike waved, and I looked at him confused. Did he just call his boyfriend someone else's name? "What it's his real name." Ike replied, and I nodded. Today was kinda a good day, but the I frowned remembering what happened at the dance. Two guys confessed their love to me, and I'm sure one was lying.

Chapter Text

Hey guys sorry I haven't been updating much like I've been wanting to. I'm just in a really tight spot at the moment, and I'm sorry about that. College has been a mess, I'm having a lot on anxiety lately (more than I already do), I'm going to start going to therapy again, and...

And I'm planning on coming out to my parents.

If you guys actually care about this I hope you understand why I might not be updating soon.

The coming out thing is pretty hard for me to do, and if you have any advice to give me please do. I know my parents views on this. They are not against the lgbt+ community, but they are not for it either. Aka they have friends that are apart of it, but they don't really like the idea of it.

I'm also going to be coming out to this boy I go to church with. He might not want to be my friend anymore, but hey you never know. Right now it feels like he''s the only friend that I got.

Chapter Text

Kyle's POV

Here2Help: Kyle? Can we talk?


Here2Help: Kyle? Do you hate me that much?


Here2Help: I'm sorry I'm not the man you want. Heck I shouldn't even call myself that after how I treated you.


I glared at my phone. Why is he messaging me so damn early? He's just messing with me. He's got to be, right? Right. I let out a sigh, and look at my bedroom ceiling. I placed my pillow on my face, and screamed into it.

I heard a knock on my door. "Kyle? You alright?" I heard my mom ask through the door.

I let out a small sigh. "I'm... I'm okay mom." I got up, walking over to my desk. I sat in the spiny chair, taking a deep breath. What the fuck am I going to do?

The dance was last night. I just can't face him. Cartman lied, and the result is pain. Since when was he ever nice to me?! When fid he even show he cared?!

"Kyle." I feel a hand on my shoulder. "It's alright." That's when I notice I'm actually crying.

Cartman hugs me, and for once I'm happy he's near me.

I shook my head trying to get that out of my head. I need to go for a walk. I went downstairs to see Ike and Firkle laughing over something on Ike's phone.

I rolled my eyes, and headed outside. I wish someone could be though for me like that. Sometimes it even feels like Stan isn't my friend anymore. He's been distant.

I just wish someone would help me show which way to go in life. I just wish someone would be my side and encourage me. I just wish someone c-

"Watch out!" I feel someone pick me up, and running off to the side of tje road. "Are you guys?! You could have gotten hit by that car!"

Car? What car? I notice a car passing by. I looked at the person who still had me in their arms. The guy was pretty tall, had brown eyes, pale skin, short wave brown hair, and glasses. He looked really worried.

"C-can you put me down?" I squeaked out as blush made its way dusting my cheeks.

The guy nodded, and put me down. "You okay though right? Not shaken up or anything?" I nodded my head. "Good. Now, what were you thinking?!"

Is this guy literally yelling at me after saving my life? "Thanks?" I avoided the subject.

"You're welcome, but please explain why you walked into the street? You could have gotten hit if it wasn't for me." The guy crossed his arms.

"I wasn't paying attention to where I was going." I confessed to my savior.

The guy's face softened. "Something bothering you?" I nodded, and guy sighed. "Come with me." He motioned for me to follow, and for some stange reason I did. We walked over to Starks pond, and we sit on a bench that was near by under a tree. Many of its leaves were already gone. "Now tell Fable what's bugging you."

"Fable?" I asked.

"My name." He replied giving me a bright smile. "You can tell me anything, and I won't judge." He shrugged.

Can I really trust someone I just met? Well he did save me from that speeding car so yes?

I sit next to Fable on the bench. "Well I'm gay." I started.

Fable chuckled. "That's it?"

I send him a small glare. "No, it's just for a couple weeks now I've been getting these letters, and they were really nice. I thought they were from a nice person too."

"And it turned out to be a two faces jackass?" Fable asked, and I nodded trying not to laugh. "Well how do you know for sure thats the real them? They could have many sides to them. Kind and mean, rude and polite, demon and angel. The list goes on."

"Cartman is not like that." I tell him, and he nods. He soon stands up.

"Well if you ever need someone to talk to here's my card." He hands me a small card.

Fable Alastor


I took it, and looked up at him. "You have your own card?" I chuckle.

He shrugs. "You never know when you might need to give someone your number."

I watched him walk away. He seems like a pretty cool guy.

Kenny's POV

I stretched as I looked around the room I was in. It didn't look like mine. I felt the blankets move a little, and that’s when I realized someone was in the bed with me. I glanced over, and saw ink black hair.

I felt my cheeks heat up. I'm in a bed with who I am hoping to be Craig. I quickly looked around the room, and noticed my pants in the floor. My face grew darker.

I felt an arm go over my lap. I looked over to see Craig opening his eyes. When he saw me his eyes widened, and he fell out of the bed. Right after he stood up, and I blushed. He grabbed a towel that was on the floor, and wrapped it around his waist.

"What the hell Kenny?!" He whisper shouted at me. "How did you get the fuck into my bed?!"

"That's what I'm trying to figure out!" I replied as I grabbed my boxers and pants out of the floor, quickly putting them on.

"Fuck if Twerk finds out then he really is going to break up with me." Craig sits down putting his face in his hands.

"I thought he already did!" Oh shit I'm a homewrecker.

"No I said he's thinking about breaking up with me." Craig replied looking for his pants. "Last night was a mistake just like this past summer."

I nodded. Don't cry Kenny. Don't fucking cry. "Craig? Y-you in th-there?"

Craig give me a terrified look. "Get in the closet." He mouthed.

"What?" I mouth.

"Ugh." He pointed to his closet, and I got in. I peeked through the cracks to see he's opening the door. "Hey Tweek. What are you doing here?"

"C-can I c-come I-in? We n-need to t-talk." Craig moves out of the way, and Tweek walks in. "Craig... About what I said y-yesterday... I-i w-wasn't th-thinking, b-but I s-still like y-you... I j-just don't think we should be together anymore."

"You're breaking up with me?" Craig asks, and Tweek nods looking like he's about to cry. "What Tweek?"

Tweek takes a deep breath, and looks into Craig's eyes. "You were the only person i ever dated that I actually count. There's more people out there." He didn't stutter, kissed Craig's cheek, and walked out of the room.

Craig looked down as the door from downstairs could be heard closing. Craig punched the wall with tears going down his cheeks. "Get the fucking hell out of here Kenny!"

I came out of the closet, and walked over to Craig. "Cr-"

"I said get the fuck out of here!" He turned to me, and he looked heartbroken. He must be. He was crying, and there was only one thing I could do. I hugged him. He feel to his knees, but I kept hugging him.

I'm not leaving him. I'd rather die everyday instead of leaving him.

I've never seen him so upset.

Chapter Text

Kyle's POV (1 week later)

A week after the dance. A week after the confessions. A week of not talking to Cartman.

I can't explain why, but it hurts. I looked around the cafeteria. Cartman was sitting at our table with Stan and Kenny. Craig was there too.

I let out a sigh, and turned around with my lunch tray. I walked to someone who I knew I could talk to. Or at least they didn't care about me talking. After all they like my best friend.

"Why the fuck are you here?" Pete asked me as i sat down in the art room. He was working on another masterpiece.

"The asshole is at school today." I shrug. I take a bite out of my apple. "What are you painting today?"

"What do you think?" He chuckled a little. I smile a little. It's really rare to hear him chuckle. Over the past week we became sort of friends. Plus I know his dirty little secret.

"Stan again?" I asked as I got up, and looked over his shoulder.

It was an almost finished painting of Stan looking out a window at some rain. Again like always it was almost life like. "What can I say? He's my muse."

I nodded. "I'm thinking about coming out to him." I blurted out. The only people who really knows about me being gay is Kenny, Pete, and Bebe.

Pete looks at me. "You sure? It's kinda a big deal."

"I'm sure. He's my best friend and everything." I tell him. Pete nods, and goes back to his painting. "When are you planning on telling Stan?"

Pete stops. He shakes his head, and starts painting again. "Have you been watching the news?" He asks changing the subject.

"No not really. Why?" I asked seeing Pete was uncomfortable about the Stan subject.

"A student was murdered last night." He stated.

I froze. Someone was murdered? "Who?" I choked out. A lot of people didn't show up today.

"Annie Bartlett." He replied.

"The vamp kid?" I questioned, and he nodded.

"They found her drained of all her blood, fingers removed, and two holes on her neck." He explained. "I guess a vampire got to the vampire girl."

I rolled my eyes. "Vampires aren't real." I told him before I stood up. Lunch will be over soon.

"It's a big mystery, Kyle." He tells me before I left. Weird, first name basics. I walked to the cafeteria, and put my tray away. Someone tapped on my shoulder making me turn around.

"Hiya Kyle." Tony smiled. "How you've been?"

"Um hey." I nodded before trying to get away, but he grabs my arm. "Tony..."

"Kyle have you thought about what I told you?" He grinned sickeningly. Something has seemed off since he moved here. I took in all his features just to see if I could find anything off.

He had deep blue eyes, the scar on his right cheek, a very light amount of freckles, a strange twinkle in his eyes, and a smile that seemed to hide something.

"I did Tony." I told him looking away from him. "My answer is the same. I don't have feelings for you like that." Tony lets go of my hand letting me walk away. I walked into my next class feeling my head pounding.

I sat down and took a deep breath. More and more students walked in, and my teacher sat behind his desk. "Good day assholes." He told us all. "Christmas is right around the bend." He got up and grabbed a hat. He passed it around and everyone took out a piece of paper. "Whoever you pick from the hat is who you have to get a present for. This year will be a great Secret Santa. Everyone I want you to write down something you want for Christmas, but I don't want you to write your name on it. I want everyone to guess who that wish belongs to.

The hat kept on being passed around until it came to me. I took a deep breath, and pulled out a name.

Eric Cartman

My heart sank. Shit tacos this will end badly. What would that fucker want for Christmas anyway? I let out a small sigh. I took out a pen and paper. I literally don't know what I would want that would be possible for someone to get me.

A new sweater vest, hat, books

Yeah that seems about right I guess. "Class I want you to explore your mind. Set it free." Our teacher sat on his desk. "Also we have a student teacher joining us today." He motioned to the back of the class. On cue everyone turned to look at the guy standing in the back.

The first thing I noticed was the guy's wavy brown hair and piercing brown eyes, glasses hung on his button nose about to fall off, his pale skin was smooth like a doll's, and a book was in his hands. "Everyone this is Fable Alastor. Fable please tell everyone about yourself."

Fable smiled showing his pearly white teeth. "Gladly." He walked past everyone to the front of the class. "Hello everyone. My name is Fable Alastor, and I'm in my last year of college learning teaching and English." He noticed me. "If you need anyone to talk to I'm here."

Why does it feel like that was targeted at me? I looked at my desk. Maybe I could talk to him about Cartman's present.

After class was over I walked over to Fable. "Hey." Fable smiled.

"Hey... I have a question Mr. Alastor." I told him.

"Please call me Fable I'm not an actual teacher yet." Fable shrugged. "What's your question?"

"Um Fable... You know that boy I told you about?" Fable nodded. "Well I'm his secret santa."

"And you don't know what to get him?" He asked, and I nodded. "I'll see what I can do to help you."

I smile. "Thank you Fable."

"No problem Kyle. I'm her to help after all." He smiled before waving me off. I left, and walked to my locker. Maybe for once everything will turn up right. Let's hope and pray.

???'s POV

Dear Kyle,

Just know everything I've done and everything I'm doing is for you. You may not understand it know, but soon you will. I want you to understand that this is all for you. For you to be stronger and less of a fragile and weak being.

This is for you Kyle.

The Vampire Of South Park

I smiled as put my pen down. I let the ink dry, folded the letter, and stared at the fire place. I walked down to my basement, turned the light on, and saw Katie Gelson aka one of the so called Vampire kids. "You know you give us a bad name." I stated before putting a gun to her head. Her tied up body shakes with fear and tears went down her cheeks.

"P-please! Pl-please d-don't do this!" She pleated.

I shook my head. "This is all for you Kyle Broflovski." I heard the shot of the gun, and Katie went limp.

Time to drink her blood.

Chapter Text

Okay so I came out to my family and the have been supportive about it. Sorry I haven't been updating. I will update soon hopefully. I have been busy with a big writing/video project. If you have any questions about it feel free to ask <3

Chapter Text

Hey guys! I just wanted to say that I started my second semester of college yesterday so updates will take a while to be uploaded. I will update as soon as I can if you want to contact me about anything like a story suggestion you would like me to write or if you just want to chat you can contact me on here or on Discord. The username is GreenvainsPieDye 

Yes I know "creative"

The number thing is 0434

Hope the rest of you week and weekend is amazing. Love you all <3