The music rang in his ears and he stopped. He stood there for a while just listening to his Hell loop play. Reminding him of the last time he was here. For her. Saving her. Always. He was reminded again of all that he had lost because of his decision to leave Hell. Decision. A decision implies options, implies he had a choice. But did he really have a choice?
Was this all part of the plan? The plan to send him back to Hell from the beginning. Maybe if I had just left when Amenadiel told me. Then nobody would have got hurt. I wouldn't be hurting. More importantly, I wouldn't have hurt Chloe. Bargaining. He was in the third stage of grief. Well, not quite.
Fire suddenly erupted in Lucifer's eyes. He stood staring at the door in front of him. The door to his own personal Hell. His mind screamed for him to enter, to face the punishment he so properly deserved. Monster! It screamed. His bloodied hand reached for the doorknob. Do it! The voice echoed in his mind. It's all your fault.
"No..." Lucifer mumbled under his breath.
"Master? What are you doing?" A demon said appearing next to him.
Lucifer turned towards the demon, the fire seething in his eyes. Lucifer reached his hand towards the demon, grasping his neck he threw the demon into the door, denting it.
"This is all your fault," He spat at the demon.
An overwhelming rage swept over him, engulfing him. He picked up the demon by the neck once more and threw him. He threw him as hard as he could, watching as Squee practically flew before smashing straight into the throne which stuck out from the ground. Thwack. Squee lay on the floor below the throne completely unconscious, thick red goo coming from the wound on his head.
Lucifer stood stationary. Just watching in horror of his action. He realised he had transformed into his devilish self, he was the monster in his head. Suddenly Lucifer crumbled to the floor. Transforming back into his normal self. His human form. Tears once again returning to his face. He screamed. He screamed and he screamed until his voice was hoarse.
"I'm so sorry Chloe," He whispered turning back to the door.
He had already twisted the handle and stepped inside the cell before he even had a chance to contemplate his decision. He was too busy thinking about her and leaving her, focusing on how bad he is for leaving. He closed his eyes. I deserve this. The voice echoed in his mind. He opened them. The view before him was the same as before, except, it wasn't. Yes, he was standing in his penthouse, the piano before him, but Uriel was no longer there. She was. Lucifer was taken aback by the Detective. He ran up to the balcony where she stood and picked her up in his arms. His mind refused to believe he was in a Hell loop. She was there. It didn't matter what the circumstances. But, of course, it was Hell, it was punishment, and he wouldn't be able to change that.
Before he could even react he found himself being pulled away from her. Her eyes red and he could almost see her heart breaking as he fell. NO. He wanted to stay, she was here. NO NO NO. He didn't want to leave her there. He broke her. He cried. You deserve this you monster. Look at what you did to her. Lucifer's heart broke once again.
He blinked and when he opened his eyes he was back, watching her cry and break over him leaving. He couldn't take it. He blinked again. This time he awoke in a small cell. Chloe leaning over him. Except it wasn't Chloe, it was a demon. Appearing in his guilt controlled Hell loop as Chloe. The demon beat him. Whipping him until there was nothing but scars on his back no bare skin to be seen. His suit was torn all over and covered in thick scarlet blood. Lucifer didn't even try to stop the demon. He accepted his fate. You deserve this. You hurt the woman you love. This is all your fault. Lucifer cried as Chloe continued to hurt him. NO. Lucifer thought. NO. This is not MY fault. Lucifer's eyes regained the red glow. With much effort, his broken body stood up punched the demon in the face. "Fuck you!" He screamed at the demon as he picked them up once again and with his full force slammed them into the wall of the cell, crack. "Fuck you."
He went to the door of his cell and stopped momentarily. It's not my fault. He repeated to himself. It's not my fault. But the monster inside him was still there. Still controlling half of his movements. He hadn't meant to kill the demons. Yes, you did. You're a monster. You know that. And monsters like to kill things. "No, no. I did it for her. I did it for her," He mumbled unsure if he was even telling the truth or just giving himself an excuse, lying to himself. He closed the cell behind him and didn't look back.
The monster inside him seethed.
"Hey, Ella, I need to go see someone okay? I'll meet you at the Mayan yeah?"
"Yeah sure Chlo, see you girl."
Chloe raced out of the precinct and drove to Linda and Amenadiel's home. She reckoned Lucifer would have told his brother that he was leaving and she was right.
"Lucifer told me, about what he was going to have to do..." Amenadiel said walking towards Chloe with a sympathetic look on his face.
"Yeah, well I'm not here for pity actually, and well I'm trying to distract myself about that whole leaving thing, or well I break down..." Chloe said tears already pooling at her eyes from the bare mention of his name. "I'm actually here about- well I'm here about the demons and well, the bodies... See, my new case is figuring out why a whole load of bodies turned up at the Mayan and I have no idea what to do. I can't really go around telling everybody that demons did this. I'd end up in a bloody mental asylum." Chloe said attempting a chuckle.
"Ah..." Amenadiel said trying to figure a way out of this mess. "Well, there really isn't much you can do. You're a detective. Why don't you just figure it out?"
"What do you mean? I can't just investigate, I know what happened!"
"Yes, but nobody else does, just investigate, solve the case Detective."
Chloe shuddered at the name. Detective. That was his nickname. Only his."Hmm, I guess that's possible." Chloe walked away scratching her head and headed for the door. She had come here for some clarity, some help on the case but her visit had just left her with more on her mind and she missed him even more.
"Chloe..." Amenadiel said just before she reached the door.
"If there's anything I can do for you, anything at all to help, just let me know okay? I know you must be hurting."
"Thanks, yeah, actually there is something, just can he, you know, hear us? Prayers and all that?"
"Well of course!" Amenadiel almost seemed shocked by the question. "Chloe, now that you know the truth you really need to think about everything that had happened. I'm sure you've seen all the times Lucifer has been praying to call me."
"Oh yeah.." Chloe said, walking outside. She would send a prayer tonight.