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I guess I should have seen it coming. Shayne is just the kind of person that everyone falls for. Even me, poor, little, pining, Olivia Sui.

“Hey, Liv!” Shayne greeted as he handed me the drink I ordered. His hand briefly brushed mine and I blushed. He either didn’t notice or didn’t care, because he continued handing out drinks. Courtney was staring at me. I think she noticed. She wore an amused expression but said nothing. Once Shayne was done passing out orders, he sat in between Courtney and Damien and started a conversation. I could go and talk to them, but I don’t exactly want to… Sh*t, I’m too deep.


TNTL #32. I’m so excited, I’m going to make Shayne laugh today! Maybe he’ll notice me more than normal. I’m going to try to stand out. I’m going to use this board thing. It’s going to be a mahalo board I stand on because the sand is too hot. Like Shayne. God, that’s weird. Courtney goes out and Shayne spits almost immediately with her dating app-lobster bit. Sometimes I wonder if they’re hiding something. Is one of them pining? Is it mutual pining? H*ll, I don’t know. Am I a yandere? Maybe. I'll have to find out. Courtney taps me on the shoulder, waking me from my thoughts.

“Hey, you’re on!” I schlepp onto the floor. Shayne looks almost mad sitting in the hot seat. He’s such a goofy boy, so he’s trying really hard not to laugh. I try to skateboard on. It fails. He looked genuinely worried when I almost face planted. I try again. He almost laughed at me just trying to skateboard when I did it the second time.

“I’m gonna be fine, we all know I’ve only had five concussions!”

“Has she forgotten about the other six?” Damien murmurs behind the folding thing. It feels so weird trying to make Shayne laugh. I normally can do it so easily, but TNTL is a little forced. My voice goes all weird and I stutter a bit. But it’s whatever, I normally make the person in the hot seat laugh anyway. I ask Courtney to push me on and she does. I take a breath before starting my bit for real.

“Mahalo! Welcome to Hawaii!” He shrinks back like he does when he’s keeping the water in. “So we can’t really step on sand anymore because sand is being turned into lava, that’s why we’re on these little boards called mahalo boards, and here, meet my friend Tom!” I hold up the lobster claw on my left hand. “Yeah, um-”

“Time!” Shayne barely spits out the water after time is called, and I smile. Then, I come up with the greatest idea I’ve ever had. Oh yeah. I put my leis on Shayne, and the look on his face is adorable. It’s as if he’s trying to say, “I look f***ing stupid, please take these off!”, but he can’t because his mouth is full of water.


After some time, I finally get to sit in the hot seat. I’m hoping Shayne does something like the weird Elmer Fudd character he’s done because, well, he’s shirtless and it’s so cute. Unfortunately, he does the unprepared performer character. 

“Uh, I- I’m telling you, once again, I did not prepare anything, I don’t have my novel written, I don’t even know anything, I- please, I- I-” His recorded voice on his phone says something and he groans. “Oh God,” he stutters some more before finally continuing. “Alright, fine, I’ll do it.” He walks out to stand on my right. His silvery wig looks like Wes’ hair, but the wig isn’t on correctly and he doesn’t have a cap, normal for TNTL. He introduces his character, Demetri, and moves on. “I’m here to tell you about my new fantasy novel series, ‘The Chain Link… Criteria’.” Then I spit out the water from between my teeth. It’s not one of my favorites, but I had to show that he’s funny and that I appreciate his personality. Woah, that’s deep. But he walked back and the TNTL shooting continued as planned, but without the affection I planned to reveal ever so slightly. Pining is awful. It feels like I have Hanahaki disease in real life. My heart aches with longing. Pining is simply so awful. F*ck.