“So, uh, I’m bisexual, by the way. Hope that’s not a problem.”
Alex looked over to the man who was in his bed, laying on his back and still catching his breath. He smiled and turned onto his side.
“Michael, we just had sex–that was a pretty clear indication that you weren’t straight,” he laughed. The guy huffed a laugh as well and closed his eyes for a minute.
Alex had decided pretty early on in the night that he was obsessed with staring at him. He was the academically gifted brother (that’s how Maria had described him) of his best friend’s girlfriend. He’d met Isobel a handful of times and liked her well enough, even if 90% of the things she spoke about were anecdotes of her brothers. Michael, the one she called her baby brother even if he was apparently the same age, had come to visit her and them by proxy. They’d all met at Maria’s bar and it took one handshake for Alex to set his mind on the idea of getting him into bed.
Only about 50% of him thought it would work.
“Some people have a problem with it,” Michael admitted after he opened his eyes, still smiling that easy smile that he turned on Alex. “That I’m doing it for attention or something, that it’s not real.”
“Ah,” Alex said, tucking the pillow beneath his head, “I think it’s real. Honestly, I think anything under the sun could be real because who am I to tell people how they feel about themselves?”
Michael laughed softly and turned his whole body to face Alex. His chest was hairier than Alex usually went for in a man, but he couldn’t deny the fact that he was into it on him. Alex wanted to reach out and touched. He almost didn’t, but he remembered that they were in bed together and having a conversation about a serious topic so what better way to keep it light than by stroking his chest hair? Michael smiled wider.
“You’re special like that. I usually tell people that right away because I like to weed out the assholes,” Michael hummed, scooting a little bit closer and giving Alex free range of his body.
“You didn’t tell me right away,” Alex pointed out, his thumb tracing over Michael’s hip bone. Michael shrugged and then tucked his arm beneath his head. His skin was hot despite the fact it was easily dipping below 35 degrees outside. It made it hard not to move closer.
Then he remembered he was totally allowed to move closer so he did.
“I liked you and I was really hoping you weren’t going to be a dick about it,” Michael said, smiling so wide that his cheeks had to hurt when Alex moved into his space to hide away from the cold, “I wanted to be a little self-destructive for once, I guess.”
“Oh yeah? For once?” Alex asked, “Isobel says you’re pretty regularly self-destructive.” Michael scoffed and his hand pressed to the small of Alex’s back, pulling them chest to chest.
“I don’t know what she’s told you, but I haven’t been self-destructive since I got out of college.”
“She said you quit your job without a backup plan only two years ago because your boss kept staring at you,” Alex pointed out. Michael gasped dramatically.
“Excuse you, I think me taking precautions to avoid any unwanted sexual advances was very self-productive of me,” Michael teased. Alex shrugged slightly, slowly becoming more aware of just how close they were. Those lips of his became intoxicating all over again, but Alex remained strong enough not to kiss him just yet.
“So, you’re bisexual,” Alex said softly. Michael took a heavy breath, nodding his head. “How old were you when you figured that one out?”
Michael laughed slightly, nudging his nose against Alex’s. “Uh, seventeen, but nineteen before I had a label. Like I’d always known I was attracted to men, but I thought it was just normal for straight dudes because I was attracted to women.
“But then there was a guy in my APUSH class and I was actually attracted to him. That was the first time that I’d met like a real-life man that I wanted to kiss and not just some fictional character like before. So I basically had a small crisis thinking I was gay and had been lying to myself for years which wasn’t fun. I cried, like, way too much about and I felt stupid then and I feel stupid about it now, but I know that it was just because I was really confused. I felt the same way about this guy as I had previous girlfriends and I couldn’t figure out which part I was faking because, obviously, I had to be faking some part of it. Or I thought so. Even thought I was faking all of it for a while and that I was an asexual who had just been brainwashed.
“But when I was nineteen, I went to a gay club and got really drunk and ended up crying on the shoulder of a very kind drag queen who told me bisexuality wasn’t something to be scared of and I was like ‘oh’.” Alex laughed lightly at the mental image of a young Michael crying in a gay club to a much older, much wiser drag queen.
“You really had never heard the word before then?” Alex asked, reaching up and fiddling with the curls at the name of his neck. Michael hummed into it.
“No,” he said, then paused for a moment, “Well, yeah, but no one ever told me what it really meant or anything. I’d only seen it in movies or online where it was a guy using it as a cover to be gay or a girl using it to sound hot or something. I didn’t know it was like a legit thing. I really thought it was a joke.”
“Well, I’m glad you figured it out,” Alex said. Michael nodded, rubbing his back gently and moved the centimeter it took to steal a kiss. Alex grinned.
“Me too, made it a lot easier to talk to you,” Michael said, rolling Alex onto his back and laying on top of him. It quickly engulfed him in a sheath of warmth that Alex loved. “If you would’ve approached me when I was 17, I think I would’ve had a fucking meltdown because you are so hot and so nice and I would’ve been so fucked.”
Alex laughed a little louder, his eyes closing as Michael started pressing kissing over his jaw and down his neck. “Nah, I was really emo in high school, you wouldn’t have thought I was hot.”
“Oh, no, you would’ve been exactly my type back then,” Michael chuckled, dousing him in further kisses.
“Then maybe we really are meant to be.” Alex almost regretted saying that, but Michael gripped his hips a little tighter and he remembered who he was talking to. He didn’t really need shame here.
“Yeah,” Michael said, “I think maybe so.”