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Rhys-Ball Gets the Clap

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Zane sighed, letting go of Rhys-ball as soon as he materialized inside Sanctuary. “Here you are. Y’owe me, Rhys, I saved your stupid little ball from extinction, huh?” He watched the pink sphere float, shaking his head. He still didn’t understand why Rhys wanted his damn sex ball here on Sanctuary when he could just come over himself, like, in person, but… whatever. Wasn’t his place to question it. Plus, he was getting paid extra for this, so that was nice.

“Thank you Vault Hunter, I certainly do owe you. I’ll repay you handsomely next time I see you!” Rhys-ball chirped, giving the sphere a little wiggle. “Not uh-- no, no, that sounded bad, I wasn’t implying-- just because I’m in a pleasure sphere not everything I say is innuendo!” he wailed, getting a laugh from Zane.

“Yeah, yeah, I’m-- I’m not even gonna go into... that. Any of it. I’m no longer gettin’ paid to care, and I need a damn nap, Rhys. Go bother Claptrap or something. ECHO your buddy Vaughn. He misses ya.” He patted the sphere, almost causing it to drop out of the air.

“There’s a-- right! Right, Vaughn mentioned it-- the Claptrap unit-- once, like waaaay back. Gotta talk to him again, see how he’s doing,” Rhys muttered. “Vaughn. Not uh. Not the Claptrap. Anyways, thanks again, Vault Hunter! You have gone above and beyond for me, for Atlas, for the whole--” and Zane had slammed his door shut. Whatever, Rhys didn’t need him! He wanted to look around, to meet people, to… find that damn Claptrap unit, actually. Vaughn could wait.

Rhys hadn’t seen a working Claptrap android since his days on Hyperion. Jack had killed almost all of them, put them in a trash compactor and broadcast the video to the entire company before declaring that day a company holiday. Anyways, there were only one or two about, usually kept in R&D for better studying or meaningless work. They weren’t good for much else, and the R&D guys were desperate for extra hands. For what, Rhys didn’t want to ask. He sure did speculate, though, and kinda wished he had a Claptrap of his own. For uh… reasons.

The Claptrap units… how could one describe them? They all had a goofy fucking look on their faces, those startlingly clear blue eyes… Curly blonde hair that Rhys wished he could run his hands through… They were all short, too, which Rhys thought was cute as fuck. Those damned smiles-- they never stopped smiling, and Rhys wished he had that energy, that optimism. Sure, they were programmed to be optimistic, and sure, it got on everybody else’s nerves, but Rhys adored it. Ugh, he wished he had one on Promethea… it would be the perfect companion for both work and on those long, lonely nights...

Rhys shifted at his desk, fingers drumming on the wood. His monitor screen displayed what Rhys-ball could see-- a few people, nobody that looked cool enough to be a Vault Hunter. Most were from Eden-6, a few from Promethea… A Quick-Change, four doors-- room for each Vault Hunter, probably. Zane had disappeared into one, and the others were locked. Nobody was down here, which was… incredibly lame. He adjusted his grip on the game controller after picking it up again, controlling Rhys-ball once more.

He floated it over to a woman bashing her head against the Quick-Change, raising the volume as he spoke through the Maliwan Pleasure Sphere. “Excuse me, ma’am! I have a question that only you can answer!” Okay, that was mostly untrue, but for folks like this being obnoxious was a better way to get them to listen.

She didn’t seem to listen, however, still bashing her head against the machine uninterrupted.

“Ma’am?” Rhys ventured again. “Hello?” Yeah, this wasn’t working. Ugh, these Eden-6 folks were damn near primitive savages! Best if he found somebody who wasn’t potentially giving themselves irreversible amounts of head trauma.

“Ooookay, let’s see,” he hummed to himself, directing Rhys-ball around a corner. There, that was somebody who looked like they knew what they were doing. “Hey, you! Excuse me, friend!” he called, and the girl turned. “Hi, robot! Oh my god, is that a mustache? That’s cool!”

Rhys grinned at his desk. At least somebody thought it was cool, unlike Zane, who’d said some very nasty things. He especially hated the fact that Zane had proudly declared that he’d have airlocked himself if he had a mustache like that. Christ. He’d expected a better response from a stache-bearing brother, but… oh well. Maybe Claptrap would appreciate it?

He sure hoped Claptrap would appreciate it.

“Thank you, kind miss!” Rhys chirped through the ball. “Could you maybe tell me where Claptrap is? I heard he’s onboard, and would really love to talk to him!”

The girl thought about this a moment. “Claptrap, huh? He’s like the coolest one onboard! I’ll show you where he is, sure!” She dropped her hood and flashed Rhys-ball a grin before running off, expecting the robot to catch up.

Rhys chuckled, audio echoing through the pleasure sphere as he moved it to follow. Down a flight of stairs-- he was thankful it didn’t roll, otherwise he’d be tumbling down and through the door right now instead of, well, floating. The girl rushed ahead, calling out for Claptrap as she went. “Hey, pink robot, he’s down here! He’s got a little room and everything, it has a disco ball, it’s so cool!”

Down some more stairs, into what was probably a cargo bay? Rhys couldn’t really tell, but there was a Catch-A-Ride station and a lot of empty space. The girl stopped in front of an old storage closet, hardly big enough for a bed, and there he was.

Claptrap.

The blonde android was curled in the corner on his side-- fetal position, a classic--, atop a pile of blankets and one ratty old pillow, reading something that looked suspiciously like a pornographic magazine. A disco ball did indeed hang from the ceiling, casting shimmering colors across the room’s walls. It was cute, Rhys supposed, but… very small.

“Claptrap! I brought you a friend, he said he wanted to meet you! Pink Robot, this is Claptrap! Claptrap, this is uh…” the girl looked to Rhys-ball, unsure. What was he, anyways?

“Rhys! My name is Rhys,” he gave the ball a little wiggle in greeting. “Rhys Strongfork, at your service, Claptrap.” At his service indeed… God, he wished he was here in person, could touch and hold Claptrap himself… he was thankful that the android-- sitting up, now-- couldn’t see his face. He was blushing like mad, a dumb smile on his face as he realized just how cute the android was.

Claptrap really didn’t look too great, outfit torn and dirty, hair a mess. The left eye had dulled just slightly from it’s normal color, and the right had gone completely black. It must not be working any more… Poor thing. Rhys wished he could hug it close and tell it that everything was going to be okay. Caress him, kiss him, make him feel good… Despite Claptrap’s current flaws, it was still cute, and waved at Rhys. “Thank you Ava!”

She laughed, scampering off with a wave, leaving the two to converse. Well, okay, they were mostly just looking each other over, until Claptrap spoke again. “I’m Claptrap, the official Commander of the Crimson Raiders!” he announced, clearly proud of this title. Rhys found it cute that he seemed to be broken and a little delusional. He obviously wasn’t Commander, that was Lilith, but he’d play along.

“Greetings, Commander! I thought since I was on your ship, I should introduce myself?” Rhys chuckled through the sphere. “Get to know you, perhaps.”

“Yes, of course!” Claptrap sat up, magazine still in his hands. “Forgive how the room looks, I took this so my crew can have even better ones! I’m just that humble!” He shot Rhys a grin-- ooh, he was missing a tooth or two. How the hell had that happened? Rhys found it adorable, regardless. Added character, made this one stand out from the rest. “So… I know they’ve mentioned you before, you’re uh…” Claptrap paused, clearly struggling to figure out who Rhys actually was. “You’re um…”

“Atlas CEO,” Rhys reminded him helpfully. Watching the poor little android struggle to think was cute but also just a tad pathetic.

“Yeah, that! You’re the Atlas CEO!” Claptrap grinned. “I knew that! You have a very sexy mustache, if you don’t mind my saying.”

Rhys almost collapsed at his desk as his heart did a fast little dance in his chest. The Claptrap thought his mustache was sexy? Nobody had called it sexy before… “W-wait until you see it in person, it looks way better on my face!” He laughed, stuttering as he tried to get the words out without Claptrap knowing just how much he was affected. “I uh. I’m currently in this Maliwan Pleasure Sphere that I’ve repurposed-- remind me to tell you about my Viper Drives!” he interjected, sort of hoping now that he could impress the little android.

“Maliwan… what? Is that like a sex bot kind of thing? What’s it for?” Claptrap asked, clearly interested. The porn mag was finally set aside, and he shifted in place before standing. He stepped closer to Rhys-ball, inspecting the robot. This also coincidentally gave Rhys an excellent view of Claptrap’s bulge. Rhys wondered how thick his cock was… he’d never seen a Claptrap naked before, but was certainly keen to do so now.

“Y-yeah, it… it’s uh… Maliwan-- this guy Katagawa Jr, he has a bunch of them on his yacht? Long story short, I’m in charge of this one. I think it was used for uh… let me see what controls I can access. Duh duh duh…” he hummed to himself. “Let’s see… we’ve got mood music, some good ol’ Digby Vermouth, we’ve got lube, we’ve got… ‘pleasure hole’? That can’t be what I think it is, right? Here, I can’t see myself, will you tell me what happens?” Rhys clicked a button, and a port slid open on the front of Rhys-ball. A hole approximately the size and depth of a cock… and it looked like it was basically a-- “Fleshlight,” Claptrap announced, putting his fingers in it immediately. You know, just to test it out.

Rhys couldn’t feel anything, but good god he wished he could. Claptrap had crouched a little more, inspecting him-- okay, the sphere-- closely with a cute little frown. God, he was hot…

“Yeah, I think you’re supposed to put your dick in it!” Claptrap announced gleefully. “That would be so nice to have, I’m getting so sick of my hand, and none of my minions want to have sex with me!”

“Really?” Rhys mused. “Why not? I think you’re very handsome, and I-- I uh. Look, I would if I were here, and not… N-not on Promethea…” he murmured, voice softening a little. God, he was blushing like an idiot again, why did this damn android have so much power over him? Nobody else made Rhys feel this way!

“Really?” God, the look on Claptrap’s face now made everything worth it. He looked excited, enamored at the idea that somebody finally wanted to have sex with him. “I bet you’re way more handsome in person than my minions, anyways…”

“I am! At least, well, I think I am?” Rhys speculated. “I’m not sure. Here-- I can uh. I’ll ECHO you a picture?”

Claptrap held his ECHO device out, letting Rhys-ball scan it and uploading a picture. There was Rhys’ default ECHO contact photo, with that goofy smile and dumb ‘siege stache’.
Claptrap looked over the photo, fingers gently resting on the screen. “You’d make a very sexy minion, Rhys.”

Oh, God. Yeah, Rhys was definitely glad nobody could see him, because he was-- he was getting hard, now, cock tenting in his slacks. “You really think so, Commander?” he breathed, face cherry red.

Claptrap seemed to really like being called that, nodding quickly. “Y-yeah, I do. I think you’re the handsomest minion, ‘cause all my other minions are super ugly, and I’d totally wanna have sex with you cause you aren’t ugly!” He shifted, finally taking his fingers out of the fleshlight hole.

It took Rhys a long moment to speak, mostly because he spent a solid thirty seconds fumbling at his belt and trying to get it open, intent on freeing his cock. “Claptrap if you… if you wanted, I’d uh. I’ll let you try out the uh… Rhys-ball?” he managed, finally getting his belt and slacks open. He nudged them down, keeping quiet as he palmed at himself through his briefs. “The-- the pleasure, hole, specifically. It… I think it self lubricates, too.” It wasn’t necessary to say that, but Rhys was fumbling like an idiot now and couldn’t stop himself. This always happened when he got enamored with somebody… talked too much and ruined it. He supposed he and the Claptrap unit weren’t too dissimilar, actually. In this regard, at least. Rhys still had all of his teeth.

“Really?” Claptrap asked, eye alight with interest. The other one was still dead, though. One hand settled on Rhys-ball, tilting it to look into what was the camera. To Rhys, though, Claptrap basically was making direct eye contact, and that sent a thrill down his spine.

“Really,” Rhys echoed, making Rhys-ball nod. “Go for it, you’re uh. You’re welcome to. I’d love to be uh. To let you use it.”

Claptrap wasted no more time, working his pants open almost instantly. Rhys watched raptly through the monitor, setting it to record. This was an interaction he wasn’t keen to forget…

Claptrap was huge, even when flaccid. Like, eight inches, huge. Rhys wondered whose idea that had been-- had Jack originally intended these Claptraps to be for sex? God, that was a hot idea… just thinking about it, Rhys was even more turned on. He watched closely, eyes glued to his monitor as the android took his cock in hand, stroking himself slowly to get hard, cock growing to an astonishing 11 inches. Rhys had measured through the screen. His ECHOeye definitely wasn’t supposed to be used like that, but he wouldn’t let that stop him!

“Ready, Rhys?” Claptrap asked, but didn’t really wait for an answer. Rhys was definitely ready, hand wrapped around his cock and leaning quite close to his monitor screen. Yeah, he was ready. He watched the best he could as Claptrap slid his massive cock into the hole, flushing bright as the android moaned. God, what a delicious sound… Claptrap was handsome, he was perfect, he sounded amazing...

Rhys let out the tiniest whimper, flicking the button to lubricate Claptrap’s cock. Claptrap began to thrust, fucking the hole slowly and deliberately, little moans slipping out every time. He didn’t fit entirely in, his cock was far too big, but Rhys could only dream of letting the android’s thick, long cock fill him one day. It sounded perfect, really… maybe he’d invite Claptrap to Promethea once this was all said and done. He’d love to get to know the android more intimately, of course.

He stroked himself in time with every one of Claptrap’s thrusts, wishing desperately that he was the one getting fucked, and not Rhys-ball. Rhys-ball couldn’t feel, couldn’t appreciate just how good a massive cock truly felt inside you. But Rhys could. He could only imagine, right now, but soon he’d make Claptrap his. They’d spend a night together, fucking for hours… He’d let Claptrap fill him-- he’d have the android’s baby if he could. God, it was a damn shame the androids were likely sterile-- he’d have to have somebody fix that. Maybe… fuck, maybe he could-- nnh, it would have to wait, all these throughts would have to. Claptrap was making such delicious noises, and Rhys couldn’t get enough of it.

Rhys set the pleasure sphere to a gentle vibrate, which was clearly a good idea because holy fuck, Claptrap had just let out the best fucking keening noise. God, Rhys wished he was getting fucked right now… pinned down in bed by Claptrap, getting fucked senseless by his huge cock, getting filled up until his insides were bulging just enough…

Claptrap was fucking it faster now, and seemed to be a lot closer to release than Rhys. It had only been like, three minutes, but there was a desperate cry of ‘Rhys!’, and Claptrap’s shoulders shook as he filled the sphere with his cum.

Rhys let out a whimper, hand moving quicker on his cock, little whines and whimpers filtering through the mic. “Ohh, Claptrap, f-fuck, wish you were here, wish I had your cock in me…” he praised, hips canting sharply as he worked at himself.

Claptrap pulled out, the pleasure hole closing itself with a click of a button from Rhys, keeping the android’s cum inside. Rhys rocked in his chair, hand working quicker until-- oh God, was Claptrap crying?

“Rhys, I’m s-sorry!” Claptrap wailed, dropping to his knees. “I got off too soon, I’m sorry, I’ve failed you, Rhys!”

Something about that, the way that Claptrap seemed to care, sent Rhys right over the edge. He came with a shout, bucking hard into his hand, release splattering against the desk. “Claptrap, G-God…”

Claptrap was still crying-- outright bawling, now. Fuck, he seemed so upset over this, over the fact that he’d gotten off before Rhys… it was almost pathetic, yet Rhys felt sorry for the little android. He left his cock out, cleaning his hand quickly and leaning close to the mic. “H-hey, Claptrap, no, no, it’s okay! That’s what I wanted, I promise!”

Claptrap looked up, tears in his eyes. “You did…?”

“I did!” Rhys assured him, making Rhys-ball nod. “I did, I promise, you looked so good, you were so good for me… I loved it, I promise-- did you hear? I came too, you looked so good…”

Claptrap sniffled, wiping his eyes quickly and looking hopeful. “I made you happy? You had fun?” He seemed excited that for once, he’d actually done the right thing. Actually impressed somebody that mattered.

“You did! And I had fun, I promise, you were so good… I’m gonna bring you here, just you wait, I’m gonna show you-- in person-- just how good you can be to me… Gonna bring you here, gonna treat you so well,” he promised. “Just you wait, when the Calypsos are dead and we’re all safe… it’ll be perfect.”

Claptrap nodded quickly, enthralled. “O-okay, I… thank you, Rhys… I’m excited!”

Rhys laughed softly. “If you’ll excuse me, I gotta bring Rhys-ball home. But I promise I’ll see you again, okay?”

“Okay!” Claptrap nodded enthusiastically, fixing up his pants. “I’ll hold you to it… minion!”

Another laugh from Rhys, and Rhys-ball was heading off…

Claptrap watched him go, eyes wide. God, he was so in love with Rhys, it was ridiculous. He was definitely his favorite minion by far.

---

2 months later.

---

Claptrap had gotten the call from Rhys yesterday, and was damn near shaking as he approached the onboard Fast-Travel. The Calypsos were dead, and everything was fixed. He had declared his retirement from the Crimson Raiders, and was now on his way to meet his real-life boyfriend in person. God, he couldn’t wait!

As soon as he materialized in Atlas HQ, two soldiers were there to escort him. He hardly paid mind to his surroundings, too excited to see Rhys, his wonderful, handsome, mustachioed boyfriend. He stepped off the elevator, ignoring the fishtanks as he rushed down the hall for Rhys’ office. Claptrap pushed open the door, and there he was. Rhys, in the flesh, sitting behind his desk with a grin. “Claptrap!” he gasped, standing slowly.

Claptrap balked a little. Rhys was… he’d gained weight since the last nude he’d received about three weeks ago. What was that all about? Oh well, Rhys was still handsome. He rushed around the desk, pulling Rhys into his arms in a happy hug. “I love you, minion!” he declared, eye bright.

“H-hey, careful, you wouldn’t want to disturb your kid, would you?” Rhys laughed affectionately. Claptrap set him down, curious. “My… kid? What?”

“Yeah!” Rhys nodded. “It’s yours! I had my team fix up your semen, change some of the properties, remove the things that make you sterile! Claptrap, I uh… I’m carrying your baby.”

Claptrap looked like he was going to pass out for a solid moment, leaning on the desk to keep himself from toppling over. “R-rhys?” he finally managed, voice soft.

“Yeah, Claptrap?” Rhys asked, a little worried.

“This is the best day of my life!!!”