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Distortions: Omakes

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OMAKE: Living Well

Her name was Matsuoka Yasu. She was almost eighteen years old, her blood type was AB, her height was 162 centimeters, and her hobby was watching trashy soap operas to make fun of them. She’d likely tell you her birth date if you asked. She wouldn’t mention that she’s had three boyfriends and she’d never tell you her weight even if you were her best friend.

Apparently, there had been a lot of talk about the Symphogears today, but Matsuoka hadn’t paid much attention to that. She was more focused on finishing her studies with term finals coming up and getting accepted into that awesome university. She didn’t have much time to pay attention to the news right now. Life was going great: she was the star student of her high school, she had all the boys salivating over her, and she had a clear idea of what she wanted to do. She couldn’t afford to let things get derailed.

But it was nighttime now, and Matsuoka had finished all the studying she figured that she needed to do for today. So there she was, lying on her bed and flipping through her phone. She had gone through all the mobile games already, but none were really holding her attention. All of her friends were busy with their own studying. So, with nothing better to do, she flipped to a random news site.

The first article, emblazoned in big headlines was “The Symphogears: Their Identities, Their Lives”. Well, Matsuoka supposed she might as well see what the fuss was all about and tapped it. 

Maria Candezevna Eve? Wasn’t she kinda old news? Oh, wait… apparently the whole thing about being a spy against that terrorist group was a lie. Damn, she was going to have a tough time with that.

Tsubasa Kazanari? That was a surprise, Matsuoka supposed. She had heard a couple of her songs and thought they were good. One friend of hers was a bigger fan and said she was “like the reincarnation of Nana Mizuki”, whoever that was.

Hibiki Tachibana? Huh, that name sounded kinda familiar, why is - HIBIKI TACHIBANA ?!

Matsuoka shot straight up in shock. Sure enough, it was her. Sure, she was taller and better… developed, but there was no mistaking her. She had forgotten about Hibiki Tachibana. Had you asked Matsuoka, she would have thought about it for a while before recalling Hibiki as that weirdo back in middle school nobody liked. But now, reading that news article, Matsuoka remembered...

There hadn’t been any particular reason they had picked on her at first. She was just the sort of awkward goofball young girls loved to tease and mistreat at the time. It wasn’t really anything serious at first: tacks on the chair, mean letters in the locker, chasing her away with snide comments… that sort of thing.

Then the Zwei Wing concert happened. That was when things really kicked into high gear. Whereas before she was just a passerby, now she was a pariah. There were plenty of people who had lost their family and friends at the Zwei Wing concert at that time, and they hated Tachibana for it. The pranks became crueler, the insults became personal and full of vitriol, and physical altercations became increasingly more common. Yet in spite of this escalation, it seemed as though none of the grown-ups cared. They could openly pick on her in the middle of class, and the teachers would just look the other way.

Matsuoka never really understood why everyone started picking on Tachibana, and in a way, she didn’t really care. Tormenting the little weirdo went from being a fun pastime to a daily hobby. When it came to the bullying campaign, she had been one of the ring leaders. Recruiting people angry at Hibiki, riling them up, and setting them loose. Helping to get adults in on it. Organizing the groups that would go and throw rocks at her house. Matsuoka had done it all to Hibiki for no reason other than sheer sadism.

And Hibiki had gone on to save the world. To save millions, no billions of lives. A group that would have invariably included Matsuoka. Not just once, but five times.

Matsuoka didn’t get any sleep that night, the night after, or really for almost an entire week. The thought that Hibiki Tachibana, the girl whose life she made a living hell, was the world’s savior wouldn’t stop haunting her for a long, long time.

Hibiki never knew it, but it turned out the best revenge is living well.

Chapter Text

OMAKE: Supernatural Forums (Definitely Not a PHO Interlude)

 

NEW THREAD: OKAY, SO APPARENTLY THIS IS HAPPENING

 

Page 1 

 

-

 

SONGbird

(Confirmed SONG Mook)

(Guy Who Knows Shit)

 

Oooookay, not what I expected from this morning. So, uh, I'm guessing you guys have questions.

 

-

 

Kalenda

(Confirmed Noise Survivor)

(Confirmed Frontier Incident Veteran)

 

Yes. Yes, we do. Many of which are some variety of WHAT THE FUCK, DUDE!?

 

-

 

Moaron

 

Seconded. I knew there was stuff you couldn't tell us, but seriously, the hell!?

 

-

 

SONGbird

(Confirmed SONG Mook)

(Guy Who Knows Shit)

 

Okay, first off, this shit was so classified I'd have been facing treason charges if I talked. Second of all, I'm sorry. This is our business. We hid this stuff on purpose, and if it hadn't been for this, it probably would've been a century before any if it was released to the public. We had our reasons, but we still lied to you guys.

 

-

 

Japanese0Groyper

 

Wait. Treason? The fuck did I miss!?

 

-

 

Moaron

 

From what I've gathered, all SONG's classified stuff was rather abruptly no longer classified. As in, all the the classified stuff. Things have since gone to hell in a handbasket.

 

-

 

SONGbird

(Confirmed SONG Mook)

(Guy Who Knows Shit)

 

Basically that, yes. Because these latest assholes hadn't caused enough pain to the people who repeatedly almost died to save their ungrateful lives, apparently.

 

Going to be a minute before I can really answer anything. I'm in charge of one of the girls' protection details, and since I'm awake, I now have the FUN job of trying to extract a bunch of unprepared teenagers from Media Hell. Because everyone forgot privacy laws exist.

 

-

 

Alola-Aloha-Allaway

(Confirmed Sperg)

 

Wait wait wait. The media know where the Symphogears live? HOW DO THE MEDIA KNOW WHERE THE SYMPHOGEARS LIVE!?!?

 

-

 

Japanese0Groyper

 

From what I've gathered, EVERYONE knows where the Symphogears live. All of them.

 

-

 

Guessing/Game

 

Ah crapbaskets.

 

-

Page 3

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Moaron

 

Aaand it begins. One of the Gears has been put on national television whilst attempting to see what the racket was. According to what I've seen on various sites, her name is Yukine Chris, eastern order. Don't know much else.

 

-

 

Kalenda

(Confirmed Noise Survivor)

(Confirmed Frontier Incident Veteran)

 

Well if it isn't bitch the first. Can we cut the bs and just arrest her now?

 

-

 

Alola-Aloha-Allaway

(Confirmed Sperg)

 

*demanding the arrest of a five time saviour of the world*

 

Imma have to ask you to back the fuck up. What the hell!? This is Symphogear Red, isn't it? She's literally the reason we still have a moon! The hell is going on today?

 

-

 

Japanese0Groyper

 

According to the sources I've dredged up over the last few hours, some of the leaked info is accusing her of having been responsible for the Noise. Yes, really. As with all of this, I'd advise taking this all with a shipping container of salt, but the sheer detail and widespread exposure says a few things.

 

-

 

Alola-Aloha-Allaway

(Confirmed Sperg)

 

What. No, really, WHAT.

 

-

 

Moaron

 

Mainstream media has started to unpack the ultimate July Surprise. Most reputable one I could find is here. Most recent revelation is that Maria Cadenzavna Eve was apparently not a spy, but an actual member of Finè. Which apparently was actually part of the American Government. Except then it wasn't.

 

Can we have our guy who knows shit back? I want to know how deep this rabbit hole is going before I start digging.

 

-

 

SONGbird

(Confirmed SONG Mook)

(Guy Who Knows Shit)

 

YOUR WISH HAS BEEN GRANTED.

 

Okay, situation very slightly less fucked here at HQ, all the kids have been successfully rescued from the press, and I've been given the go ahead whilst AC tries to un screw this. So! To explain what the actual fuck just happened:

 

A new asshole brigade has shown up. As they hadn't gotten civilians involved beyond a particular incident that is high on the list of Most Terrifying Moments Of My Job, we hadn't announced that it'd started. Which was apparently a mistake, as in an act of pure dickery, they hacked our files, stole the info on the kids, and then sent it to basically everyone. Cue panic.

 

So! There goes the kid’s anonymity. Because life wasn't crappy enough for them. At any rate, all of them are at HQ until we can politely explain to the media that privacy laws are a thing (I literally needed a helicopter to get through the reporters) and will likely have to change address. Also, opinion here, but Kazanari Jrs career is utterly fucked. Just as a note.

 

Alright, so that's the sitrep. Questions Away!

 

-

 

BurnOut

 

“Asshole brigade” is an interesting nickname. Media’s only lightly touched on it, but apparently they released their own statement with the leaks. Video here. It’s… something. “Four Horsemen”, now if that isn’t an ominous as fuck name. The message itself is interesting though, reminds me of this group I ran into about a decade ago who went on-and-on about the “supremacy of human self-will”. Called themselves the Global Incidental Society or something like that.

 

-

 

Japanese0Groyper

 

….Well. Can see why they got called the Asshole Brigade. Wow those guys are dicks. I mean, sure the Custodians were jerks, but that doesn't mean the people who happen to be using some stuff they left behind are. Especially when said people make a living saving the entire human race. Anyways, questions. I'm using western name order for my sanity.

 

  1. What the hell was happening with the Finè group? Because I can't tell what the fuck.
  2.  Is Kazanari Jr referring to Tsubasa? Like, the Tsubasa Kazanari? If so, is that why every Queens of Music/ZweiWing concert seems to end badly?
  3. Are the accusations leveled at Chris Yukine true? If so, why was she never charged?

 

That's it from me.

 

-

 

SONGbird

(Confirmed SONG Mook)

(Guy Who Knows Shit)

 

@Japanese0Groyper

 

  1. I can understand your confusion. From what I can tell, they were originally an offshoot of the American government manipulated by the Bavarian Illuminati to form a terrorist group. They believed that the Kadinger Incident had caused the moon’s orbit to become irregular and that would spell doom for mankind, so they wanted to get their hands on the Frontier in order to reverse the moon’s orbit. We have actual records of the data, so I can confirm they were correct. It would've been a good long while, but the moons orbit was about as irregular as it could get without causing disasters. Also, one of their members, Dr. Ver, was a literal mad scientist who used the Noise to attack civilians, much to the chagrin of the others. Like, in all seriousness, that guy was a lunatic. Towards the end of the incident, there was a lot of in-fighting within Finè, resulting in their Symphogear adaptors helping us capture Dr. Ver before giving themselves over to the authorities.
  2. Yes and yes.
  3. Those accusations are partially true. But those accusing Yukine of wrongdoing ought to look at two facts: first, Finè (not the terrorist organization, but the woman the terrorist organization was named after) was the true source of all the Noise attacks up until the Kadinger Incident. Second, while Yukine did use the Noise to kill people during the Kadinger Incident, she wasn’t linked to any Noise attack responsible for civilian deaths, she was only sixteen years old at the time, and she did so under duress. Finè had kidnapped Yukine at a young age, abused her in pretty much every way you could think of, and manipulated her into committing the attacks for her own ends. And it was Val Verde before that. Yes, that Val Verde. She joined Second Division/SONG as part of her deal with the Japanese government, and to be completely honest probably wouldn't have been punished very harshly even without that. That girl had been through more than a kid that young ever should, and we had barely managed to finally convince her to actually trust… anyone, basically. No way in hell we were gonna risk undoing what little progress we'd made because of something she did whilst indoctrinated, abused and traumatised to the level she was.

 

-

Page 23

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Master9

(Moderator)

(Archive Junkie)

 

To help cut down a bit on our guy-in-the-knows job, I’m trying to sift through the documents and update the wiki with their data, maybe even start an FAQ depending on what gets asked here. I’m using the documents released by this group since they seem the most comprehensive, but there’s a lot to go through.

 

Do try to stay civil people, I know some of you may have sore feelings from your experiences but don’t just lash out with insensible profanity.

 

The only question I have is, dear god, did any of these girls have decent childhoods? Because just skimming the personnel files it seems like only the newest Symphogear has that. Amazing they wound up using their powers to save the planet instead of blowing it up or something.

 

-

 

SONGbird

(Confirmed SONG Mook)

(Guy Who Knows Shit)

 

@Master9

 

Thanks for the help, Master. This is turning into a giant fustercluck on my end, so I appreciate the help.

 

And to answer your question: having been a part of the original Second Division and SONG alike for six years, and having known all but one of the girls in that time. No. They didn't. They really didn't.

 

-

 

Alola-Aloha-Allaway

(Confirmed Sperg)

 

I'm. Really not sure I want to know. 

 

Alright. Let's hear it. Who the hell are these kids?

 

-

 

Japanese0Groyper

 

  1. You've mentioned that your actual job is bodyguarding the badasses. Do you know any of them personally, or do you just stay out of each others job?
  2. How often does a situation that needs Symphogear level awesomeness happens? As in, the non-literally saving humanity ones.
  3. When did this whole thing begin? I mean, the records from this Second Division you mentioned aren't as comprehensive as the SONG ones, not that that isn't a high as f*** bar, so when was it that Symphogear was discovered?

 

-

 

SONGbird

(Confirmed SONG Mook)

(Guy Who Knows Shit)

 

@Alola-Aloha-Allaway

 

They are all good kids who, in spite of having crappy childhoods, have decided to risk their lives time and again to save mankind’s collective bacon. Honestly, the only thing I really regret about this mess is the fact that people have decided to spit on their desire to stay anonymous. It's the only thing any of them have ever asked for for all they've done, and… well, look where that went.

 

@Japanese0Groyper

 

  1. I do have detailed information on their backgrounds and personality profiles, so I know them in that sense. However, I don’t really talk to them that much. It’d be kinda weird for me to be friends with them anyways, considering the age difference. Plus, I gotta stay professional. That said, they are all good kids; there’s not a single person in SONG that dislikes them. One I interact with most is Tachibana, the one I'm in charge of guarding. Nicest kid I have ever met. Could also kick my ass six ways to Sunday without blinking, but Symphogear.
  2. Well, a lot of our jobs involve either saving people from natural disasters or dealing with criminals that violate UN regulations on Heretical Technology use/ownership. Not exactly threats to humanity. In all my time working for SONG, there have only been five such “world-saving” incidents: The Kadinger Incident, the Frontier Incident, the Magical Girl Incident, the Bavarian Illuminati Incident, and the Shem-Ha Incident. As for the lesser incidents, we get a call about every two weeks, though many of those aren't combat missions.
  3. That was before my time, so I don’t know all the details. The theoretical work behind the Symphogear started about twenty years ago from my count. It quickly became non-theoretical once the Noise were officially recognized by the UN fifteen years ago. By the time I joined (which was about six years ago), Amou and Kazanari Jr already had fully-functioning Symphogears and were fighting Noise.

 

-

 

BurnOut

 

“Bavarian Illuminati Incident”. I still can’t believe the conspiracy nuttos were right. And they were apparently led by a literal fucking demon. BECAUSE OF COURSE THEY WERE!

 

-

 

Page 25

 

-

 

Kalenda

(Confirmed Noise Survivor)

(Confirmed Frontier Incident Veteran)

 

Why aren't any of those murdering pieces of shit in prison?

 

-

 

Japanese0Groyper

 

@Kalenda

 

Dude, I can tell from that banner you have there that this is a touchy subject and all, but we literally just had a mod tell us to stay cool. Let's not throw around stuff like that till we know what's going on, capiche?

 

-

 

BurnOut

 

Roight, best I can tell from what’s on the news, here’s who's who (leaving out Maria, because we already knew she was a ‘Gear). Names are western order.

 

Tsubasa Kazanari: Yes, THAT Tsubasa Kazanari. People who speculated that are probably feeling very smug right now. She’s got swords.

 

Hibiki Tachibana: She’s that one who showed up on TV briefly during the Frontier Incident. She punches stuff.

 

Chris Yukine: The one everyones freaking out about, besides Maria that is. Blows stuff up. A lot. And has a lot of dakka. Some contradicting claims over whether she’s responsible for the Noise first showing up or not.

 

Shirabe Tsukuyomi: Black hair and smoll. She has a weird buzzsaw robo arm thing, except their twintails and not arms. No, really. Was also in Finè, which is also freaking people out.

 

Kirika Akatsuki: Blonde, seems rather hyper from what I can tell. Big ‘ol scythe. Was also in Finè, which (you guessed it) is freaking people out.

 

Miku Kohinata: She’s the newest one. Beam spammer, although footage of her is rare. Probably because she’s so new. Apparently was pretty involved in that Shem-Ha thing a few months back.

 

Also, apparently there were two more ‘Gears back in the day who died.

 

Kanade Amou: Those with memory might recall her as Tsubasa’s partner in Zwei Wing who died at their last concert. Turns out she went down fighting. She had a spear.

 

Serena Cadenzavna Eve: Yes, that name means what you think it does. Maria's younger sister. Not really much information on her except that she's dead.

 

Oh, yeah, Maria’s powers are based on some kinda whip-knife-sword thing.

 

-

 

Moaron

 

Wait, shit, Maria had a sister?! Jesus, this mess gets worse every new thing we found out.

 

-

 

Guessing/Game

 

  1. Are there any concerns re: the safety of the kids? Stupid question given their job, but the simple fact we know about this is proof that some folks are going to hold a grudge.
  2. How strong are they? I mean, we know they've accomplished some ridiculous feats, but what exactly are these kids able to do?

 

-

 

SONGbird

(Confirmed SONG Mook)

(Guy Who Knows Shit)

 

@Guessing/Game

 

  1. There are. We have a security detail that watches them all the time. Although given what they’re capable of, our job usually amounts to either dealing with threats that don’t require a Symphogear or buying time for them to transform. Which varies between a complete bore and utterly terrifying, usually dependent on whom and what is trying to kill me. 
  2. I am unfamiliar with the technical details of the limits of their strength, but I will say what I know from experience. If you recall, there was an incident about a year ago in which the K2 Mountain went from being the tallest mountain to the third tallest mountain. At the time, I said I could neither confirm nor deny that the Symphogears were involved. I now can tell you that not only were the Symphogears involved, but I was in the control room when that operation went down. And it was just as utterly insane as that sounds.

 

-

 

Guessing/Game

 

HOLY SHIT!!

 

-

 

SONGbird

Confirmed SONG mook 

Guy who knows shit 

 

Yeah, that was definitely one of the more insane things they've done outside saving the world. I still remember the exact moment I realised Tachibana just punched a mountain several hundred meters shorter.

 

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Page 27

 

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DoubleTheFun

(Inveterate Shipper)

 

So… are any of them single?

 

-

 

Guessing/Game

 

Really? I think they’d be rather out of your league.

 

-

 

DoubleTheFun

(Inveterate Shipper)

 

A guy can dream, can’t he?

 

-

 

SONGbird

(Confirmed SONG Mook)

(Guy Who Knows Shit)

 

@DoubleTheFun

 

I’m afraid it’ll be in vain. I can’t speak for the other five, but Tachibana and Kohinata are definitely already in a relationship.

 

-

 

DoubleTheFun

(Inveterate Shipper)

 

Oh. Can you tell us who the lucky guys are?

 

-

 

Master9

(Moderator)

(Archive Junkie)

 

@DoubleTheFun

 

Judging by some of the Shem-Ha Incident documents, each other. And if I’m reading this right, apparently their love for each other was enough to help save humanity.

 

-

 

DoubleTheFun

(Inveterate Shipper)

 

No shit? That’s… actually rather sweet. Like something from a fairy tale.

 

-

 

Informal10 (BANNED)

 

[Post Deleted]

[Master9 Moderator Ban: Open Homophobia? In this day and age? Your time on many forums must be short.]

 

-

 

SONGbird 

(Confirmed SONG Mook) 

(Guy Who Knows Shit)

 

@DoubleTheFun

 

Heh, yeah, it is. Was kinda hoping that part would be missed for the sake of the kids privacy, given that they've had it screwed up too much as it is, but those two have been officially together since the Shem-Ha mess. And would've been for years if Tachibana wasn't denser than a harem protagonist. I swear to God, Kohinata literally said it during the Frontier Incident and that girl STILL took most of two years to put two and two together. 

 

And by the way, @Informal10?

 

Fuck you.

 

-

Page 28

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Kamen rider 555

 

You know, looking at these documents… are we sure they’ll always be staying so heroic? I mean, the Hibiki kid almost got transmuted into something by her own relic. Who knows what these things might do to them in the future. Hell, might be doing to them right now. Are we sure they aren’t still influencing the adaptors in some way? I get the objections over hurting the girls, but maybe we should at least get rid of the relics?

 

-

 

SONGbird

(Confirmed SONG Mook)

(Guy Who Knows Shit)

 

@Kamen rider 555

 

There’s no chance of that. Again, don’t know the technical details, but Tachibana's Gear’s technical issues were fixed after the Frontier Incident, and none of the Gears have mind-altering substances. And if we did find out something, we would fix it immediately. 

 

-

 

Kamen rider 555

 

@SONGbird

 

But what about this “Project: Ignite”? Not many in the media are talking about it, but from what I can tell, it’s supposed to boost the Symphogear user’s power by artificially increasing their aggression. Do we really want impressionable girls with that much power becoming more aggressive?

 

-

 

SONGbird

(Confirmed SONG Mook) 

(Guy Who Knows Shit)

 

@Kamen rider 555

 

First off, Project Ignite was a desperation move that we only went for because we literally thought the kids were gonna die otherwise. Second, the most important part of the module blew the hell up and unless folks are holding out on us, we can't replace it. 

 

-

 

Kamen rider 555

 

Ignite was an example though. What other features are hidden in these things that nobody knows about? The documents themselves admit they don’t know all the capabilities of the Symphogears. Probably the only person who did fully understand them is dead. And what is the point in keeping these things around at this point anyways? The Noise are all gone. So are the Alchemists and the Custodians. Maybe there was a need for them in the past, but that’s the past.

 

Despite a decade and a half of practical research on it, “heretical technology” hasn’t yielded anything that could be applied in the civilian realm. All it has yielded is weaponry. Even discounting potentially disastrous unforeseen physical/mental alterations, it’s just been dumb luck that the Symphogears have wound up in the hands of people who seem moral enough not to intentionally use it for their own advantage, on other humans (well, mostly: the footage of Maria killing those spec-ops in Tokyo Tower is a bit frightening, although I suppose it was self-defense). But I doubt we can count on that being the state of affairs in perpetuity.

 

-

 

Alola-Aloha-Allaway

(Confirmed Sperg)

 

You know, Kamen rider, your bringing up some of the same stuff brought up by these “Four Horsemen” guys in their video.

 

-

 

Kamen rider 555

 

Well, they make some interesting points. I don’t get why they have it out for those girls, but reading through the documents I can see where they’re coming from in terms of the relics. What do we know about them besides the fact they (A) don’t like ‘heretical technology’ and (B) released all this information?

 

-

 

SONGbird

(Confirmed SONG Mook) 

(Guy Who Knows Shit)

 

@Kamen rider 555

 

It's true that no one still alive fully understands Symphogear. Whilst I personally doubt it, there might somehow be something that could hurt the kids in there.

 

But there is manifestly a point to keeping them. See, the thing people like you tend to forget? SONG's job, and the job of the Second Division before that, has never been to fight. The full name of the Second Division was "Special Disaster Relief Organisation Second Division". And we have always held to that. For every fight that the kids get into, for every terrorist with alchemic tech or out of control Relic, and yes, for every supernatural threat poised to end the world, we have ten or more deployments that consist solely of saving lives. And with Symphogear, the kids can make situations that should be completely unsurvivable end without a single scratch on anyone

 

That time Tachibana punched K2? That wasn't a fight.

 

It isn't something we like to bring up, but Maria's adopted mother died during the Frontier Incident. Went to the moon in person, helped Maria turn all the stuff the Custodians put there back on, and single-handedly put the moon back where it was supposed to be. Sacrificed her life to save the world. Name was Professor Nastassja Sergeyevna Tolstaya.

 

Well, as I can now tell you, just a couple days before the K2 thing hit the news, a bunch of astronauts were sent up to the various bits of the Frontier that ended up in orbit. Originally, they were just there to get anything not nailed to the floor, but Maria and the other FIS kids, most of whom were either adopted out to various homes and unable to really do much or still rather preoccupied with the aftermath of the Finè thing, asked us if we would mind bringing their Mom back home for burial. We promptly altered the mission plan. The shuttle went up, made it to Frontier, recovered the late Professor, found all kinds of goodies, and began reentry.

 

And of course, things immediately went horribly wrong. Because we can never have a single damn thing go right.

 

So we're still not sure what precisely went wrong, the shuttle was a bit of a mess afterwards, but some technical gubbin borked itself, and the shuttle started crashing into some city in Nepal. I was still in the car at that point. Initial response by the United Nations amounted to "welp. They're dead." The Commander at the time promptly objected and asked the security council if they would pretty please let the Second Division do a thing. The girls didn't even wait and jumped straight into the Symphogear deployment rocket in our missile launcher. And yes, that's a thing. We had a submarine, we used the hell out of that submarine. I made it to the control room about now, for reference.

 

So there we were, the girls waiting in the missile of deployments and asking if they could do the thing already at least twice a minute, Commander glaring at the screen, the FIS kids hogging the TV, me and the other security team leads also glaring at the screen, AC (he was the intelligence director at the time) also also glaring at the screen- you get the point we were waiting a while.

 

And then, right as we started to wonder if everyone was just going to do nothing and let those guys die, we got the approval.

 

I… Uh. There really isn't a way to put what happened next into words, so Imma just show you.

 

Dunno if that was in the news yet, I've been a little occupied finding new and inventive ways to keep Tachibana away from the armada of reporters everywhere, but uh, yeah that happened. 

 

That's the actual point of SONG. It's not about fighting, even if we end up doing a lot of that. It's about helping people. And I know that that simple fact is why we've kept this up.

 

Even if you ignore that, I used to think we would never need Symphogear in battle again too. I thought, when we realised the Noise were really gone, "This is it. It's over. Those crazy kids won't have to risk their lives again and again because no one else can anymore."

 

And then the universe introduced us to Alchemy.

 

When Adam went down, I thought, "We've taken down the greatest Alchemists of all history, beaten that crazy bastard, and dismantled the motherfucking Illuminati to boot. Even if any other Alchemists try to start something, we're past the worst of it. It's over."

 

And then reality decided Shem-Ha needed to happen.

 

When that ended, I thought, "We just defeated a goddamn Custodian, and the alleged creator of Humanity at that. We broke the Curse of Balal. We did it. No matter what, there can't possibly be anything more powerful out there. It's finally over, for good."

 

And apparently something out there disagrees, because they threw the Horsemen at us instead.

 

Even now. Even after everything, there is always a chance there will one day be something out there that humanity as we stand cannot fight. One category of beings in particular can quite literally never be harmed, no matter what, save by one, singular Relic. There is always another day, another time, another chance that yet another foe will rise. I know that that's what the girls believe. And that, above all, is why they stayed on after everything. Because even if you have a point and there couldn't possibly be something out there that we need Symphogear to defeat… what if you're wrong?

 

-

 

Guessing/Game

 

So… what is these Four Horsemen guys deal anyways? They like another group of alchemists or something?

 

-

 

Moaron

 

Their statement video is as harsh on alchemy as they are the Custodians or the ‘Gears. So I doubt it. Is there anything you can tell us about them, @SONGbird?

 

-

 

Kamen rider 555

 

I’m kinda curious too. Groups like this don’t just pop-up overnight.

 

-

 

SONGbird 

(Confirmed SONG Mook) 

(Guy Who Knows Shit)

 

Sorry, can't say much. I only know a tiny bit more than you guys, and most of it can be summed up as "they're assholes". We only even realised we'd been hacked like three days ago. All we really know is they A) hate the Custodians, B) hate us, and C) have some serious bullshit on their side. And no, I can't explain said bullshit.

 

As far as Alchemy goes, they don't seem to be using any. Can't say for sure, we have reason to doubt pretty much everything about these shitheads, but no obvious alchemic BS so far.

 

-

 

Kamen rider 555

 

Yeah, I don’t buy that. You knew they hacked you. I’m not an expert, but I doubt groups like that just up and acquire the sorta resources needed to hack a UN Agency out of thin air. They’ve had to have been around for awhile and on someone’s radar.

 

-

 

SONGbird 

(Confirmed SONG Mook) 

(Guy Who Knows Shit)

 

Well, whoever that "someone" is, Yukine would like to have a word with them. Can't tell you why, but suffice it to say, she's pissed right the fuck off.

 

-

 

BurnOut

 

She doesn’t seem to be a happy camper in general, but then looking at some of the stuff she went through I wouldn’t be either.

 

Anyways, not to try and set off Groyper on one of his… unique rants, but is this stuff connecting SONG to Imperial Japan really accurate? Please don’t tell me you guys had any association with something like Unit 731 or something...

 

-

 

SONGbird 

(Confirmed SONG Mook) 

(Guy Who Knows Shit)

 

*deep breaths*

 

Okay! First off. No. No we did not and I literally could not be happier about that because fuck those sorry excuses for human beings.

 

Second! SONG has no connection to the Imperial era. The Second Division did, in the sense the Special Disaster Relief Organisation we were the Second Division of was created on the order of Emperor Hirohito in I think 193...5?7? The thirties. However, we had basically nothing to do with the war effort; as the name indicates, we were the guys trying to make sure people didn't die when everything inevitably went to shit. The secrecy I honestly am not sure on, I think it might have just been us Second Division guys thanks to Symphogear being a state secret back then. So whilst we have some connections to the war era, it's pretty much solely in the sense that most SONG personnel are ex-Second Division. Like myself, for instance.

 

-

 

Kamer rider 555

 

That seems like a contradiction to me. If SONG was formed using Second Division as the cadre and Second Division was established by Imperial Japan, then that’s a pretty clear connection between Imperial Japan and SONG. And some of this stuff about the ‘Kazanari Foundation’ that was involved sounds a bit skeevy…

 

-

 

Master9

(Moderator)

(Archive Junkie)

 

Chopped off most of the debate on irrelevant Imperial Japanese policies to the Historical Subforum. Please try to keep any discussion of Imperial Japan in this thread as it relates to SONG or the recent revelations. And I will issue threadbans to enforce that, @Japanese0Groyper.

 

-

 

SONGbird 

(Confirmed SONG Mook) 

(Guy Who Knows Shit)

 

Thanks again, @Master9. That… was not a fun discussion. At any rate, back to the subject at hand. Any of you guys still got questions?

 

-

 

Moaron

 

Well, um. What exactly are these Relic things? I know that they have something to do with the Custodians and that the Symphogears use them, but what are they?

 

-

 

SONGbird

(Confirmed SONG Mook) 

(Guy Who Knows Shit)

 

…. Ask the complicated one why don't you. Gimme a few minutes, I gotta yell at people till I A) know what I'm allowed tell you and B) what to tell you in the first place. I'm a mook, gimme a break!

Chapter Text

“So why are the Sierra-Golfs a pack of lesbians anyways?” Voronin asked as he muted the post-conference panelists, already dismissing them as a bunch of blow-hards before they even opened their mouths.

The sudden question didn’t quite register with the rest of the White Noise in the room for a moment. Caprice glanced up from the bomb she was putting together while Darmawan threw one last punch at the boxing bag before turning in curiosity. Gowon just made a silent huff before he resumed reading his journal. From where she was meditating, Jwa didn’t even acknowledge the question, discarding it as stupid.

“You didn’t read the report?” Caprice finally replied. “It said-“

“I read it.” Voronin snapped. “Blahblahblah genetics of double-x chromosome blahblahblah harmonics of the female voice blahblahblah gene-therapy for potential transgender candidates blahblahblah Finé went all misandrist because she couldn’t take percieved rejection.” He jabbed a thumb over at the list of Symphogear adaptor names, and their associated White Unit IDs, they had pinned up on the wall. Only two of the nine names were already crossed out, although the small words ‘wasn’t us, more’s the pity’ were scrawled next to them. “None of that technobabble said that being gayer than Erasure was a requirement.”

“Are we sure they’re all gay?” Darmawan asked. “Seems rather presumptuous.”

Caprice shot him a disbelieving look. “Sierra-Two and Seven are together, as are Five and Six. The two divas are dancing around, but obviously have it for each other. Red Unit is suspects Three might be pining after some random girl it can’t decide is worth our while or not.” She held up two fingers. “Looking at the Retireds, Two was a thing with One-Actual before she kicked it and Three…” she trailed off for a moment. “Okay, we don’t know about Three-Retired, but even if she wasn’t that doesn’t disprove the Sergeants point. One out of nine is like the inversion of how this is supposed to be, statistically speaking.”

“Plus there’s the girls at that school.” Voronin chipped in, brushing idly at his pants. “You know how they’re all supposed to be Gear candidates? I swear, not one of them is lower than a two on the Kinsey scale.”

Gowon, without even looking up from his journal, began. “The Kinsey scale-“

“Is a demonic deception perpetuated by the secularist society trying to lead potential converts away from salvation.” Caprice interrupted him. “Right?”

“Actually, I was going to say that it’s assignment of numerical values is a gross oversimplification of a concept as complicated as sexual identity, something even Kinsey admitted, and it takes no account of gender identity or romantic attraction.” Everyone stared at him. Even Jwa, who had otherwise written the entire conversation off as not-worth-her-time, had opened her eyes at that. “What? I read a lot."

Chapter Text

OMAKE: Supernatural Forums 2: Electric Boogaloo

 

THREAD: OKAY, SO APPARENTLY THIS IS HAPPENING

-

Page 63

-

SONGbird 

(Confirmed SONG mook)

(Guy who knows shit)

 

Alright! After a fuck ton of panicking, scheduling, trying to help Tachibana avoid Infinite Reporter Hell, hoping we don't get shot at, and other fun times, the first press conference has arrived! Kazanari, the AC and Maria will all be on stage momentarily, so hold onto your hats!

 

-

 

Burnout

 

Just a few more minutes until it kicks off. I can’t imagine how it’d be to have Yukine up there, given how she flipped out on that one reporter a couple of days ago.

 

-

 

SONGbird 

(Confirmed SONG mook)

(Guy who knows shit)

 

Oh God, don't remind me. I swear to God, when I found out what that idiot said… long story short, Yukine was NOT making an empty threat there. Seriously, what the fuck made that guy think that that question was okay is beyond me. At any rate, yeah, Yukine is the one we're worried for- she isn't exactly the sort who deals with people trying to hit her buttons well. And it's the media, so I'm not even going to bother with the effort of hoping they won't hit the buttons.

 

-

 

Kamen rider 555

 

You haven’t tried to coach her or anything? People who don’t trust her to hold her temper in front of the press aren’t going to trust her to hold her temper on the battlefield. Which is a real problem when you’re talking about someone with as many missiles as that.

 

-

 

SONGbird 

(Confirmed SONG mook)

(Guy who knows shit)

 

We are giving her some coaching, but all the coaching in the world isn't going to change the fact that we're about to have to throw a traumatized eighteen year old in front of the media and tell her to suck it up when they inevitably hit the memories. Honestly I'd rather she didn't go period, and so does almost everyone on my end, but the security council overruled us.

 

-

 

Moaron

 

Motorcade just pulled up to the ministry building. Cameras outside showing Maria and Kazanari coming in. They’re composed, but I guess that’s to be expected from a pair of idols.

 

-

 

Alola-Aloha-Allaway

(Confirmed Sperg)

 

They are totally hot and I am so glad the two of them made it to that conference. I hope this doesn’t negatively impact their idol careers.

 

-

 

Guessing/Game

 

It probably will. There are rumors about record companies cutting ties with them after the reveals. Maria’s getting it harder, naturally, but there other companies with Tsubasa are worried about liability issues if another of her concerts get hit again. It’s unfortunate. I really liked their music.

 

-

 

DoubleTheFun

(Inveterate Shipper)

 

Eh, so long as they have each other then I’m sure they’ll be fine.

 

-

 

BurnOut

 

You are aware that they’ve denied they’re together like that in their past idol interviews, @DoubleTheFun?

 

-

 

DoubleTheFun

(Inveterate Shipper)

 

And I’m in denial over their denial. Sue me.

 

-

 

Moaron

 

Right.

Anyways, conference is starting as of this post and… Shinji Ogawa? He’s your commander, right @SONGbird? He seems really low key…

 

-

 

SONGbird 

(Confirmed SONG mook)

(Guy who knows shit)

 

He's actually our former intelligence director, but there was a major shake up right before the leaks that ended up with him as AC. He's been doing a pretty good job, though, so here's hoping. And yeah he's pretty low key. Mostly because he is a literal, no shit, ninja. No, really. Anyways, the AC is about to finish his opening statement, so get ready for the actually answering part of this shebang.

 

-

 

Guessing/Game

 

Wait wait wait. YOUR BOSS IS A FUCKING NINJA!!?

 

-

 

SONGbird 

(Confirmed SONG mook)

(Guy who knows shit)

 

My boss is a fucking ninja. And he's actually less badass then the old man was. Which says rather a lot about the absurdity of the previous Commander. And on that note: question time! Pay attention, folks!

 

-

 

Moaron

 

Alright, so Literal Ninja Commander is up. And I can't believe that's a sentence.

 

Slightly surprised the kids actually still did the exams, I wouldn't have blamed them for skipping school after all this got dumped on them. Though, isn't Yukine eighteen? Why is she doing exams? I mean, with the utter shitshow her life has been, I wouldn't exactly be surprised she missed a year, but still.

 

-

 

SONGbird

(Confirmed SONG mook)

(Guy who knows shit)

 

The kids are pretty dedicated to having normal lives in every way they can. They weren't in this as anything except a way to help people with their power. Unfortunately, a lot of that normal life they wanted is gone, now, but they're still trying. Pretty glad for it, actually. Gives them a bit more time, and whilst I may not be sure on the new pr guy yet, I agree that more time to get ready for this is good. And as far as Yukine goes, she's actually in college right now. She was behind for a while, but she's seriously smart, and managed to catch up. She was lucky, to be honest. A lot of kids who go through what she did only have primary/elementary school education max and can't catch up even after being rescued, but Yukine was taught physics by Finè so she could use Ichaival better. Probably the only completely good thing that woman ever did for her. Dammit, Ryouko.

 

-

 

BurnOut

 

I'm glad to hear it. I'm involved in cases like this thanks to my job, and I was really worried when I read that report. Still am honestly, all of that must of left some scars.

 

Also glad to hear that you didn't break the child soldier laws. Somewhat less glad to note that that's because the age is a year lower than I feel it should be, but you guys had some pretty good reasons. This time.

 

-

 

Kamer rider 555

 

They only didn’t break the child soldier laws if you go by the letter. I’m pretty sure one could mount a legal argument that it’s a clear violation of the spirit. 

 

Looking at Commander Ogawa’s answers, that answer also ignores how Tsubasa became an adaptor when she was only eight years old, if I recall correctly. His second answer skirts around the issue that the kid’s powers are currently tied to the relics, best we can tell. Get rid of the relics and it’s a non-issue.

 

I’m torn about the legitimacy of the first answer too. On the one hand, I don’t really trust traumatized teenagers to make the best decisions when it comes to agreeing to work on this sort of stuff. On the other hand, it seems like you guys did pick up on that and have been trying to genuinely do good by them. So, eh…

 

The answer to that last question though? About informing people in regards to the nonessential secrets? I’ll be frank and say it smells like total ass covering. Glad to hear you guys are promising to do better though. Hope you go through on it.

 

-

 

SONGbird

(Confirmed SONG mook)

(Guy who knows shit)

 

Aaaand here we go again.

 

First, Kazanari accidentally attuned herself to Ame No Habaikiri when she was eight, yes. That doesn't mean she actually did anything. The most she did back then was get started on the ridiculous training she does, and that was her grandfather's idea. For reference, those of you not involved in the derail. Kazanari's grandfather was thoroughly in the asshole category. Seriously, he was an abusive piece of shit of truly epic proportions. And then he was responsible for Noble Red, and by extension Shem-Ha. Fuck that guy.

 

I've basically given up getting you to not buy every word the Horsemen sell when the Relics are involved, but the kids are the only people who can use the Relics. If another threat on even the Alchemists’ level shows up, they're literally the only people who can do something about it. And that doesn't even get into the fact they're all lunatics who'd run headlong into the crap they've fought training or no just to see if they could help any single person. Like, no shit. If we had tried to stop Tachibana from fighting the day we first met her, she'd have, smiled, nodded, and promptly ignored us and fought anyways. Because she's insane. The only reason these kids survived was because of the Relics, so they're not just something we can up and take without good reason. Airgetlamh in particular, given it is literally the only thing that still exists that Serena had. Like, with all due respect, that Relic is the only thing of her sister Maria still has. That isn't something we can just take away after everything she's already been through.

 

On a related note, we're trying. These are some rather fucked up kids, even if they refuse to acknowledge it. They've been through things they never should have, not just including but especially Tachibana, and unfortunately, it's been frustratingly difficult to get them the help they need. Hell, it's been two years since she showed any signs of being iffy when not brainwashed, and I'm still worried about Kazanari, but you try convincing these kids to see a therapist and actually talk more than the bare minimum. Because I'm pretty sure literally every single active member of SONG has, at one point, tried that. I swear they just ignore us literally every time. And not just when it comes to therapy. And yes, the not telling no longer important info thing was stupid. We know. We are kind of trying to fix it. Please let us instead of finding something new to yell at us about before we can.

 

-

 

Guessing/Game

 

Okay, I gotta admit: the way Kazanari ended that opening statement? Powerful. I think I even teared up a little. She’s taking questions now.

 

-

 

Alola-Aloha-Allaway

(Confirmed Sperg)

 

Don’t worry Tsubasa! WE FORGIVE YOU!

 

-

 

Guessing/Game

 

Well, we don’t doubt you do. You’re such a SONG fangirl. And I really mean it in the best way possible. As for me… well, I guess I can at least forgive the ‘Bossa.

 

-

Page 64

-

 

BurnOut

 

Aaaand Kazanari sinks @DoubleTheFun’s vessel for the umpteenth time.

 

-

 

DoubleTheFun

(Inveterate Shipper)

 

NEVER GIVE IN! I WILL ALWAYS HOLD ONTO THIS DETERMINATION TO FIST!

 

-

 

BurnOut

 

You’re probably gonna get a kick if you keep up with that sort of innuendo.

 

-

 

Master9

(Moderator)

(Archive Junkie)

 

Eh, it’s clever and not-lewd-enough that I’ll let that one slide.

 

-

 

Guessing/Game

 

Ouch. They’re pulling in Amou on her… 

 

-

 

Moaron

 

Oh, ow, she botched that follow-up to the “why keep pursuing these big concerts” and I think she knows it.

 

-

 

Kamen rider 555

 

There really wasn’t a good answer she could’ve given. By having those big concerts while knowing she’s a potential target for bad guys, she shows a reckless disregard for the lives of all her fans. It’s irresponsible and undermines everything SONG stands for. This, in addition to the entire “keep their identities secret” schthick SONG has been pulling for the past few years makes me wonder how altruistic she is.

 

-

 

SONGbird 

(Confirmed SONG mook)

(Guy who knows shit)

 

I'm getting tired of having to explain this to you. The secrecy was not the girls idea. It was ours, as the adults who were in charge, which they agreed to because they didn't want people they cared about to be in danger, like they currently are. And before you say anything: No. No, I do not put murdering the kids family past the Horsemen. Given the only ones I've seen made ISIS look tame in terms of fanaticism specifically regarding their sheer hatred of the kids specifically, I don't put genocide past them, if they thought it would hurt the kids. No shit here, folks, theses guys outright stated the didn't care about anything except killing the kids to their faces. This is not an empty threat from the Relics. They want the girls to die. 

 

And secondly, Kazanari is aware that her concerts are apparently cursed. I heard Maria mention before all this that she was starting to worry she was getting a complex from how often it's gone wrong. She only even agreed to the most recent QoM concert because like 90% of SONG including every single one of the other adapters were present and on guard, and because we didn't know of any thing that could happen. Of course then the Horsemen decided to be a thing and she's spent every single day since then panicking over how bad it would've been if they'd started shit, because these girls didn't have enough problems.

 

-

 

Kamen rider 555

 

Wait, so which is it: was it the kids idea or SONG’s idea? Because both Tsubasa’s and your commander’s opening statement indicates the former. I’d quibble asking you about what the Horsemen have done, not because I like or don’t like the Horsemen but because I’m genuinely curious, but you’ve indicated that’s classified for now so I’ll respect it.

 

-

 

SONGbird

(Confirmed SONG mook)

(Guy who knows shit)

 

It was our idea, but the kids went along with it because of the reasons Kazanari and the AC stated when we reorganised and things were up in the air. Technically, they could've talked about it whenever they wanted too, but they never exactly wanted to be famous and, as said, they've got friends and family outside SONG.

 

I'd really like to answer that second question, because literally every other day seems to have some new way for these assholes to piss me off, but I'm pretty sure that everything you guys don't see on TV is still classified.

 

-

Page 64

-

 

Moaron

 

And Maria’s up… and they’re starting with her questions. Huh interesting choice.

 

-

 

BurnOut

 

Wait, fuck. Some of the receptor kids have gone missing? I didn’t know that.

 

-

 

DoubleTheFun

(Inveterate Shipper)

 

WHAT KIND OF FOLLOW UP WAS THAT?!

 

-

 

Whiteg10

 

Never thought I’d agree with DoubleTheFun. Maria with Ver? Ew. And Maria agrees.

 

-

 

BurnOut

 

Ah-ha, yeah. That’soh fuck did they really just ask Maria that?!

 

-

 

Alola-Aloha-Allaway

(Confirmed Sperg)

 

Who the fuck uses her sister like that?!

 

-

 

Kamen rider 555

 

Is she making light of what she did in FiS? I doubt @Kalenda would be happy to hear about that.

 

-

 

BurnOut

 

I think she’s trying to defuse the tension

 

-

 

Kalenda

(Confirmed Noise Survivor)

(Confirmed Frontier Incident Veteran)

 

[Master9: Right, infraction, permanent threadban, three-day kick. If you’re gonna overreact to something like that, best not do it online. Only reason I’m not giving you a week or worse is because I know your history.]

 

-

 

SONGbird

(Confirmed SONG mook)

(Guy who knows shit)

 

@Kalenda 

 

No. Just… no. Maria was all too willing to do her time and receive any punishment she got. That she got off relatively easy for her crimes was mainly due to politics beyond SONG’s control. And personally? I think saving the world multiple times and risking her life in the line of duty as one of SONG’s agents has been her way of paying back all the damage she did as a member of Fine. 

 

-

Page 70

-

 

Japanese0Groyper

 

I have returned from threadban hell! Finally, I get to talk about this topic. 

 

So, I’m curious what everybody thought of that press conference. I found the entire thing fascinating.

 

First, I have to say: Tsubasa and Maria, while far from perfect, came across as both poised and noble to a fault. I don’t think there are many public figures willing to admit that they’ve fucked up in the past without giving some kind of resignation speech. If only we had more politicians that had this level of honesty and accountability… 

 

Second, some of the questions the media asked weren’t the questions normal people would’ve asked. I mean, asking questions about their love life? Seriously? Are they reputable news organizations or celebrity tabloids? I guess they were scraping the bottom of the barrel since the expose answered pretty much any of the questions one could have, but it’s just not a good look. 

 

Third, there are some things that leave more questions than answers. That Tsubasa inherited the Kazanari Foundation (the same Kazanari Foundation that orchestrated the Shem-Ha Incident!) or that the orphans that were kidnapped by the American government’s FIS had gone missing were big pieces of information that haven’t been talked about enough by the general public, I think they need addressing. All of these supernatural incidents are the result of power-hungry lunatics orchestrating government conspiracies to amass even more power for themselves. How much have we missed? How much are we not being told? And is it still going on?

 

-

 

BurnOut

 

Alas, I guess there’s only so much time one can fit into a press conference. Although, yeah, I’m 75% sure there were some celebrity tabloids who got in there, somehow. Who vetted this thing?

 

-

 

SONGbird 

(Confirmed SONG mook)

(Guy who knows shit)

 

The answer to your question, @Japanese0Groyper? Nobody. Nobody vetted this fustercluck, primarily because people decided it needed to happen literally now whether we liked it or not. I'm pretty sure we didn't even know what stations/publications/studios were there in detail. We were basically told to get the Adapters there and if there wasn't enough time to even know who else was there, too bad.

 

With regard to the Foundation, Kazanari inherited it by default. Her bastard of a grandfather was, well, a bastard and in prison after she kicked his ass, and her father died helping to stop him. She was the only member of the family with a claim, and that was that. She only started having involvement with that mess about a week before all this, and most of it's been making it smaller. And Maria wasn't kidding earlier, I hadn't heard about the other Receptor Children disappearing either. It's concerning news, I'm probably going to have a few guys on the case by this time tomorrow.

 

-

 

Moaron

 

Huh… wasn’t her grandfather jailed back in February though? Why she only actually wind up with it a bit over a week ago? Problem with the legal paperwork?

 

-

 

SONGbird

(Confirmed SONG mook)

(Guy who knows shit)

 

She was leaving it to an old friend of the family who she was close to. And then the Horsemen murdered him. Because they hate us.

 

Yeah, I'm not kidding around. These guys are going out of their way just to hurt the girls. Honestly, I'm pretty sure all that stuff about the Relics is an excuse at best.

 

-

 

 

THREAD: MAJOR EXPLOSION IN TOKYO (EDIT UPDATE: TERRORISM CASE, SYMPHOGEAR INVOLVEMENT CONFIRMED)

 

-

 

Guessing/Game

 

So something just went down in Tokyo. Big ol’ blast in the lower floors of an office building. Here’s an updating article on the situation.

 

EDIT: Okay, there are running rumors that Tsubasa Kazanari was seen shortly after the explosion, all Gear’d up. Would call it just gossip, but there’s video footage to corroborate. Our official guy-in-the-know indicates it’s true.

 

EDIT2: And, confirmed statements by SONG and the Japanese Government on Kazanari’s involvement. They also say the explosion was caused by the Four Horsemen, apparently centered on a bank. Main suspect is a “Caprice Calcaterra”, former FAI terrorist who was apparently drafted into the Italian Army as part of a plea bargain as a demo expert and then deserted to the Horsemen. Apparently Kazanari saw her fleeing the scene and gave chase,but she got away somehow. No statement from the Horsemen though.

 

-

 

Moaron

 

Rumors flying around that one of the Gear’s was at the scene. Some footage camera footage here.

 

-

 

Alola-Aloha-Allaway

(Confirmed Sperg)

 

Woah, this is a gear issue? That’s pretty big. Do they know what caused the blast?

 

-

 

BurnOut

 

Nothing on that front yet, best I can tell.

 

-

 

Moaron

 

More camera footage here of what is very definitely Tsubasa Kazanari helping people out of the building. That’s a big sword. Although why’d she leap down from it afterwards?

 

-

 

Guessing/Game

 

This seems to be why. Footage of her chasing some blonde lady down a crowded street. Look at them move! How the hell is she doing that? Not Kazanari, we know how she’s doing it, but the other one.

 

That poor officer though.

 

-

 

SONGbird 

(Confirmed SONG mook)

(Guy who knows shit)

 

Can confirm Kazanari is on scene. Culprit believed to be Caprice Calcaterra, a member of the Horsemen's elite anti adapters hit squad. Objective unknown, attempt to assassinate Kazanari considered likely. Maria on route, trying to contact the others. More when I have time, need to get to the bridge.

 

-

 

Moaron

 

Woah, hold the hell up. “Elite anti adaptors hit squad”? What do the Four Horsemen have that can touch an adaptor…

 

Although I suppose trying to catch Kazanari without her gear does make the most sense, from an assassination standpoint, as ugly a statement as that sounds.

 

-

 

Page 2

 

-

 

Guessing/Game

 

-

 

And Japanese Government confirms it’s a terrorist bombing. Looks like they tried to go after Kazanari making a withdrawal. Eyewitness interviews on the news, including some people Kazanari saved.

 

Some of these people sound pretty in awe of their encounter with her. Wonder what it’s like to be around an adaptor in their armor.

 

-

 

SONGbird 

(Confirmed SONG mook)

(Guy who knows shit)

 

I'm back. Situation mostly over. Almost got Calcaterra, but she called back up and ran for it. Kazanari is fine, she was already out of the building when things went boom. More later, I need to get out there and help figure out what the hell happened. And get the adapters back to HQ. And help the survivors. This is gonna be a minute.

 

-

 

Moaron

 

Whelp, SONG’s issued their official statement and it’s pretty much as SONGbird says.

 

Some information on Caprice: apparently she was a bomb maker for the FAI, an Italian anarchist group, and regarded as a pretty damned fine one at that. So good, that when the Italian’s caught up with her, they offered her a plea deal: she testifies against her cell and joins the Italian Army as a bomb defusal expert, they don’t chuck her in jail. Then apparently she copped her parole and ran off to join the Four Horsemen after just a year.

 

What her Army co-workers have to say on her… don’t paint a very pretty picture. “Total lack of empathy”, well no shit there. You see how she unhesitatingly she shot that cop?

 

-

 

Master9

(Moderator)

(Archive Junkie)

 

Well, since the Gears are involved, that makes this a legit supernatural incident. Thread moved accordingly.

 

Properly right and horrified for what happened and glad Kazanari tried to do what she could to help. Hope they’re able to find and catch Caprice.

 

-

 

BurnOut

 

Fuck, that’s the sorta psychos the Four Horsemen have working for them? Holy shit.

 

-

 

Japanese0Groyper

 

Local news is interviewing a lady who Caprice apparently held hostage in order to try and get away from Kazanari. It also… sounds like she was saved by a second ‘Gear user? The official statement did say that Maria arrived towards the end of things, so maybe it was her. Guess our Guy in the Know will be able to clarify when he gets back. Just a heads up on that query, @SONGbird.

 

Lady also sounds pretty amazed by the ‘Gears, like she had a religious experience with them or something. Have to echo Guessing/Game’s question about what it’s like to be in their actual presence when transformed. All we’ve got is camera and audio footage.

 

-

 

Alola-Aloha-Allaway

(Confirmed Sperg)

 

Holy hell, I didn’t have much doubt that the Four Horsemen deserved the title “asshole brigade” but fuck if those doubts are all gone now.

 

-

 

Moaron

 

Several miscellaneous groups have claimed responsibility, but they’re the sorts who claim responsibility for everything. Everyone seems to agree it’s the Horsemen, but they themselves haven’t said anything.

 

Then again, we haven’t heard anything from them since they released all that info, so… 

 

-

 

SONGbird

(Confirmed SONG mook)

(Guy who knows shit)

 

I'm back. Again. Sorry I'm late, long as shit day on my end. Gonna try and answer some of the questions I can see so far.

 

First up, can confirm it was without any doubt the Horsemen. We don't have much info on them, but Calcaterra is a known member and has been since they were discovered. She's a member of a six-man group who referred to themselves as White Noise squad, who apparently are, as I mentioned, some form of anti-adapters hit squad. We encountered them when they suddenly attacked a training exercise we were running with the JSDF the day before the leaks and attempted to assassinate the kids, after throwing a small army up to and including artillery at them. That was how we found out they existed, by the way. They failed, but the fact they managed a draw in their favour against all seven of them is concerning to say the fucking least, even with the fact the girls were dead on their feet by then. The other members have all been identified, but I'm not sure if I'm allowed say who. They apparently were using some sort of extremely advanced technology, but nothing we can clearly identify as H-Tech or A-Tech. Just ridiculously advanced conventional stuff. I say "apparently" because nobody except the kids actually saw the fight, there was some sort of jamming blocking us until they'd already retreated. How they got said tech is unknown, which is why I've stated my doubts they really aren't using supernatural stuff, they literally couldn't have got this far ahead otherwise. Not gonna give examples without explicit permission, but pretty much every single one of us field agents were calling bullshit so hard you probably heard us across the Pacific.

 

Second, the incident happened shortly after Kazanari left the building following a meeting with her lawyer. And before you panic, she was talking with him re: Kazanari Foundation downsizing. She indicated during debrief that she thought she saw Calcaterra as she walked out the door, but lost sight of her before she could confirm and dismissed it due to not being able to think of a reason she'd be there. Maria and the others are currently attempting to convince her to stop kicking herself for that, little luck thus far. After Kazanari left, there was a couple minute gap before things started exploding. Kazanari promptly realised that she had in fact seen Calcaterra, remembered a series of assassinations currently believed to have been performed by other White Noise members over the past weeks, figured that she was there to kill her, and then noticed the building was still open and people were trapped inside. She transformed immediately, and began search and rescue as usual for such situations, though admittedly we normally encounter such situations when we specifically deploy for them. After S&R, she caught Calcaterra trying to flee the scene. Reason she was still there unknown, the AC and our resident Alchemical Gremlin are working on it. Can confirm that we work with a bank in that building, so she may have been trying to destroy our stuff. At this point, we'd gotten Ame No Habakiri on our sensors and called Kazanari to ask what the hell, and had been informed of the situation. Maria was present at the time, and deployed immediately whilst we called the other adapters in case there was another attack on them. After about a minute of chasing her, Calcaterra attempted to take Miss Shoko hostage, but was prevented by Maria's timely arrival. Unfortunately, we failed to take Calcaterra into custody due to a second member of the White Noise who appeared at the last second, and stunned Kazanari enough Maria didn't think pursuing further was a good plan. We've since gotten all the adapters to HQ, and none of the others reported anything abnormal. Kazanari is thankfully unharmed, and there were fewer casualties then estimated due to her rapid intervention. Her lawyer is also unscathed. Somehow.

 

Thirdly, yeah, being around the kids when they transform is… definitely one hell of an experience. Hard to describe, honestly, but it's like they're… kinda otherworldly, I guess. I’m a bit used to it because I know they're still the same goofy kids I spend my day keeping an eye on, but the first time was one hell of a thing. Miss Shoko got it worse because she VERY suddenly had two of them in front of her at their maximum power without X-Drive or other weirdness, but even when you get used to it or they hold back, you still definitely notice.

 

I'll do more in a second, need to get Tachibana home.

 

-

 

Japanese0Groyper

 

Wait, your telling me these guys got a small army into Japan and nobody noticed? As in, like, a real army with infantry and tanks and aircraft and stuff, not Alca-Noise? HOW?!

 

-

 

BurnOut

 

You… caught some of them right? Not the White Noise, these guys sound as hardcore as they do crazy if they fought the girls to a draw, but some of the rank-and-file, right? And you haven’t managed to get anything out of them in a week?

 

-

 

Moaron

 

That’s, uh… wow, @SONGbird. Ambushing the JSDF and SONG is something of a feat. That’s kinda scary. I mean, if they can get an army into Japan, where else can they get an army into?

 

EDIT: I, uh, kinda went snooping around when SONGbird mentioned ‘other’ assassinations and I found this guy and this guy who were found stabbed and this guy who was shot down at a rally. There are no official suspects so far. Additionally, there’s been a spate of congressional killings in the US this week that I really doubt are a coincidence.

 

-

 

SONGbird 

(Confirmed SONG mook)

(Guy who knows shit)

 

Right, Tachibana returned home. She's still sad about the literal army of reporters on her doorstep, but there isn't much I can do for her there except stand ominously in the general vicinity next time her landlord threatens people with harassment and trespassing suits. At least the army seems to have gotten a bit smaller since the first press conference. Anyways, that's done and I am officially off duty, as much as I ever am, so back to explaining this latest mess.

 

@Japanese0Groyper

 

Yes. Yes they did in fact sneak a small army onto Japanese soil and ambush us without anyone noticing. We've been panicking over how the fuck they managed that for a while. Admittedly, it was a pretty small army. No tanks, just attack VTOLs and mortars. Which is still slightly terrifying, but less than if they'd managed to get armour out there.

 

@BurnOut

 

Actually, despite the fact they threw almost a thousand guys at the girls before the White Noise showed up, we didn't capture a single one. Every single one of them, and I mean Every. Single. One. Of. Them. Committed suicide upon defeat. Usually by throwing themselves on whichever of the kids was closest and then blowing themselves up. Some of them even bashed themselves to pieces on the kid’s gears trying to kill them with their bare-hands. That was terrifying enough for us, nevermind the girls.

 

Yeah, as Yukine put it, these guys are fucking psychopaths. We know why, or at least we've got a fair idea, but I'm afraid it's classified as fuck right now. Even most of the kids don't know the full details, let alone me.

 

@Moaron 

Can confirm that those cases you found are the ones I was talking about. Fucking hell I miss Minister Shibata already. Guy was one of our biggest allies, ever since way back in the Second Division days. Gonna be harder without him. And he gave good advice on noodle shops. As far as we can tell, two members of White Noise are responsible, and appear to be targeting basically any politician who backs us up. We'd be doing something, but China is being pissy and holding us back over technicalities.

 

Anyways, I've talked to the AC and I am officially cleared to tell you some of what little info on the Horsemen we have. More specifically, White Noise. Thus far, there are six of them. Identities and motives are as follows:

 

Samantha Acampora: Sorry, @Kalenda. Bad news here. It's THAT Samantha Acampora. For those of you not getting it, Acampora is commonly agreed to be the single most badass American Soldier in all of Army history. Only Sergeant York comes close. Seriously, this woman's service record is fucking bullshit. Two Noise attacks survived, some reports of managing to literally do the impossible and kill Noise without a Symphogear in the area to make them obey physics, and literally uncountable acts of badassery in more mundane deployments. She went missing alongside her unit a few months ago on a UN peacekeeping mission, only to reappear as the leader of the White Noise squad. She has a grudge with Kohinata, as she apparently blames her for her brother dying during the Frontier Incident. This appears to have caused her to go completely off the deep end, to the point of reacting to lyrics in Tachibana's song by shoving a grenade into her face by hand after pulling the pin. And then ranting for about a minute in an audibly unhinged manner. Yeah, she's lost it. 

 

Caprice Calcaterra: The one you know. She's in the document Moaron put up, so not much to add. Attacked Maria at the ambush, but from what she's said and we know, it's quite likely she's doing this for fun. Was the one who blew up the building, and I can now confirm that she did in fact blow up our stuff. Fortunately we have pretty much indisputable evidence that she blew up our stuff on purpose, so the government paid us back. Had a confrontation with Kazanari when she took Miss Shoko hostage. Kazanari called her "a monster wearing human skin" with a visibly angry expression gives me some bad feelings. Frankly, I don’t blame her.

 

Kir Voronin: Yes, really. THAT Kir Voronin. The sniper so ridiculous, he got a thread on this very forum attempting to determine whether there was supernatural influence involved from the sheer absurdity of the shots he's pulled off, is with the Horsemen. I should know, the asshole shot at me. Lost three guys, all of them from them taking a bullet aimed at Tachibana and Kohinata. Most terrifying moment of my fucking job, I really thought I'd end up being the one who let them get killed for a while there. We don’t have the first clue as to why he’s joined up with them. His statements indicate some ideological buy-in with the whole “get rid of relics” crap, but then they all seem to indicate that. You may remember that I mentioned early on in the Q&A thread that Yukine is fucking pissed at him. Well, that she was pissed as fuck in general, but I can now tell you she is pissed off at him specifically. Can't tell you exactly why, but it involves the aforementioned incident. Preeeeettty sure she's only not charged off to hunt the bastard down personally because she's worried about the other kids. She fought him in the ambush, but the entire thing was a disaster, and I'm fairly certain she left that fight more angry.

 

Jwa Ji-Eun: Did you know Korean Ninjas are a thing? Because Korean Ninjas are apparently a thing. The other of the ones running around assassinating people who back us up, along with Voronin. She was the one who fought Kazanari in the ambush. We actually do in fact know what her deal is: according to the AC, her family has the mother of all grudges with his family thanks to some complete shitshow over a century ago, and they've been trying to ninja his family to death ever since. By his account, the feeling's mutual at this point. Appears to basically be here primarily due to that, but it's hard to tell with these guys. 

 

Darmawan: So, some of you might not have heard of this guy and those of you likely only know of him from last years Guinness World Records. First, watch this. No, that is not a trick. Yes, he lifted that for real by himself, no H-tech or A-tech involved at all, just pure muscle. Fucker’s strong. He’s also the strangest case here: he has practically no history as a combatant. He did bodyguard work, but apparently that was just so he could have some income. I’m guessing he’s been training since he joined up, because the debrief indicates he did reasonably well going fisticuff with Tsukuyomi and Akatsuki. He apparently wants to take a swing at Tachibana in a fistfight. What precisely made him think this was a good plan confuses me.

 

Gowan: The only member of the Horsemen who actually told people he was leaving. He was raised by a militia in Africa, who apparently rivaled Yukine's experience in Val Verde in terms of being utter bastards. He was rescued by a Christian missionary group, and he apparently was himself deeply faithful. About six months ago, he told the rest of the missionaries there was something he felt he needed to do and that he wouldn't be coming back. Apparently that thing was joining the Horsemen. Actually bothered to explain why he hates us: apparently, he finds us religiously offensive. Something about the Custodians are false gods, and the kids are just a new set of liars. I didn't really get it.

 

So those are the assholes we know. Unfortunately, there's probably more of them. These are just the ones we know anything about, and who fought the kids. Any other members of the Horsemen are either unknown, or dead.

 

Anyways, questions. Ask away, guys. I'll be here a while.

 

-

 

Kalenda

(Confirmed Noise Survivor)

(Confirmed Frontier Incident Veteran)

 

THAT Samantha Acampora? No way, I don’t believe it. The lady is a Medal of Honor recipient for christ sake. No way ‘Killer Sam’ joined up with people who plants bombs in office buildings for kicks.

 

-

 

Moaron

 

Uh, wow. That rather explains the whole “able to go toe-toe with the adaptors” at least a little bit. Like, the fucking Raven of Death is with the Horsemen? And the Samantha Acampora? And the rest are apparently on their level? Uh… wow.

 

-

 

Guessing/Game

 

Hold the phone. Voronin came off as a rather patriotic Russian in that discussion we had about him, and he’s on the record of doing their business in Eastern Europe both officially (as part of their armed forces) and unofficially (as part of that PMC when he ‘retired’). Running off to shoot at the adaptor’s on the other side of Eurasia with terrorists strikes me as something of a non-sequitur for him.

 

-

 

BurnOut

 

Patriotic? Sure. Was he more patriotic than your average Russian soldier? He didn’t come off that way to me. He did say in that one Russian TV interview he “lives for the challenge of the shot”. Maybe he was getting bored with hitting regular people and figured landing hits on ‘Gears would be a step up. Would the enticement of that step-up be enough to outweigh his nationalistic feelings? Fuck if I know.

 

That said... if you want patriotic: Samantha. As Kalenda noted, she’s a medal of honor recipient. It stretches credulity that she just all of the suddenly gonked off to the other side of the world to work for a terrorist organization. SONGbird mentions that she thinks Kohinata killed her brother in the Frontier Incident, presumably when Dr Ver had kidnapped and brainwashed her, but that seems a bit weak by itself. Taking SONGbird’s statements about these people at face value, and his unofficial statements have otherwise mainly lined up with the official stuff so far so I see no reason not too, there’s something missing here about why these guys are doing what their doing.

 

Well, save for Caprice. She’s obviously just a raging asshole.

 

-

 

Moaron

 

I dunno, maybe they’ve been brainwashed? It’s a real thing that happens. Perhaps the Horsemen got a hypno-device that allowed them to mind control the biggest badasses on the planet and bring them onto one team. I know I’d do that if I were a supervillain with a mind control device.

 

-

 

Japanese0Groyper

 

Something else that’s missing: even if these guys are the biggest badasses on the planet, they are all still human. How the fuckity fuck can they go up against a Symphogear? I mean, the adaptors wield the most powerful weapons on the planet. Even with their skill, they’d need to have some serious bullshit on their side.

 

@SONGbird are you sure you can’t bring up more information? Don’t you have a working theory as to how they can do what they do?

 

-

 

SONGbird 

(Confirmed SONG mook)
(Guy who knows shit)

 

@Japanese0Groyper

 

Sorry, but that’s what we’re trying to figure out. We think it’s high tech bullshit, and we have an unfortunately classified idea as to what it does, but the exact “how it works” is just a mystery. Our trusty Alchemical Gremlin is working on it though!

 

@Kalenda

 

Sorry, buddy. Wish I could tell you it was a mis ID, but pretty much everything we've got says it really is her. Could barely believe it myself. Hell, she isn't even the only member of her family in the Horsemen- We had to arrest her niece, Emily, right before the ambush after she tried to stab Kohinata on her way to school. Probably would've pulled it off, too, if Tachibana hadn't managed to kick her ass. And like I said, from what we've seen, she's gone completely nuts. Kohinata's been blaming herself for it ever since… 

 

-

 

THREAD: SYMPHOGEAR PRESS CONFERENCE PART DEUX: THE CONFERENCING

 

-

Page 1

-

 

SONGbird 

(Confirmed SONG mook)

(Guy who knows shit)

 

Alright! After even more panicking, scheduling, helping Tachibana avoid Infinite Reporter Hell, and hoping we don't get shot at than last time, the second conference has arrived! And better yet - you get to learn what I have to deal with on a daily basis. Yes, that's right. In less than fifteen minutes, Tachibana Hibiki is going to happen to the general public. I'd normally ask God to have mercy on your souls, but you only have to watch by TV.

 

Unfortunately, I'm even more worried about Yukine than last week, after the news we got this morning. Here's hoping the press will be occupied with recovering from the imminent Tachibana.

 

New thread because the Happening thread kept getting derailed even harder somehow.

 

-

 

Moaron

 

Heh, you beat me to it by like a minute.

 

-

 

Guessing/Game

 

Ooh boy, this is going to be good.

 

-

 

Japanese0Groyper

 

@SONGbird, did you actually vet the reporters this time to make sure none of those fucking tabloid garbage papers got in? 

 

-

 

SONGbird 

(Confirmed SONG mook)

(Guy who knows shit)

 

Well, we managed to vet some of them. Couldn't do much in the time we have except tell the adapters to beware a few of the more ridiculous and/or openly hostile reporters though.

 

-

 

Alola-Aloha-Allaway

(Confirmed Sperg)

 

I saw the footage of them walking in. Akatsuki looks nervous as all get out. Poor girl. Couldn’t help but notice how Tsukuyomi hovers around her. Not sure what to make of the look on Yukine’s face.

 

-

 

Kamenrider555

 

Mmm… I’m sure it’ll be interesting. Particularly when Yukine gets up there.

 

-

 

Kalenda

(Confirmed Noise Survivor)

(Confirmed Frontier Incident Veteran)

 

[Master9: Kalenda, I get this is personal to you. Since you were a bit more reasonable here than in the first thread, I’m not giving you a kick from the forum and only deleting some of the post. However, by the site’s rules, I still have to at least issue infractions and a permanent threadban. I’ve only deleted the more grossly offensive parts of your post. However, your infraction rate is getting close enough that I may be forced to take more drastic measures regardless. Watch yourself when you come back.]

 

That said, I’ve come around to the view that we should let the kiddos off. Still don’t quite like Maria, but she earned some points from me for trying to take down Caprice on Friday.

 

Still have a hard time believing Killer Sam’s a part of those guys. Goddamn.

 

-

 

Kamen rider 555

 

@Kalenda

 

Really? That’s unexpected coming from you. I personally think there should at least be some more severe consequences. I mean, half the girls on the team are ex-terrorists that served zero jail time. I get it, mitigating circumstances, working for SONG as a condition for staying out of jail, yadda yadda. But treating them differently just because they have powers doesn’t sit right with me, and it shouldn’t sit right with anyone who wants a fair and just legal system.

 

-

 

Alola-Aloha-Allaway

(Confirmed Sperg)

 

@Kamen rider 555

 

Dude.

 

Dude.

 

They are the fucking saviors of the world. They saved the world five times from beings that threatened to wipe out/enslave humanity. I think that counts as community service or something.

 

-

 

Kamen rider 555

 

I will not be drawn into this argument again, @Alola-Aloha-Allaway. It will only derail the thread. The show’s about to start.

 

-

 

SONGbird 

(Confirmed SONG mook)

(Guy who knows shit)

 

Oh goddamnit. @Kamen Rider 555, can we please not do this again? Because you've made it clear you aren't going to listen and I'm kind of sick of trying. I'd hoped the Horsemen's recent actions might have made you rethink things, but apparently not.

 

@Alola-Aloha-Allaway

 

Yeah, Akatsuki doesn't seem to be doing too great. Kohinata didn't seem to be doing the best either, but she seems good today. We're pretty damn sure something happened at school the first day back - seeing Tachibana genuinely angry was not something I expected to happen - but they haven't said anything. Not that they ever do. That Tsukiyomi is hovering this much doesn't bode well though. As for Yukine… like I said, we got some really bad news this morning. Won't say what for the moment, but suffice to say the only reason the entire thing wasn't cancelled is because the security council overruled the entirety of SONG. I'm really worried to be honest, but nothing I can do.

 

On a much less depressing note: Tachibana Hibiki herself is on stage. May God have mercy on those reporters. She won't have much.

 

-

 

Kamen rider 555

 

Yes, let’s see how one of the few Symphogear adaptors who aren’t ex-terrorists will perform.

 

-

 

Alola-Aloha-Allaway

(Confirmed Sperg)

 

Omg, she’s adorable! Such genki! Much wow!

 

-

 

BurnOut

 

Huh, hard to believe she was bullied as a kid. Even not knowing her record, how could anyone dislike her?

 

-

Page 2

-

 

Whiteg10

 

I think my heart skipped a beat when she made that wink. She’s gay right? Bet she’s very popular with the other girls at her school. Wonder how many of them were heartbroken when she hooked up with Kohinata.

 

-

 

Moaron

 

@BurnOut

 

It slipped my mind she was bullied. Wonder what those people think of her now.

 

-

 

SONGbird 

(Confirmed SONG mook)

(Guy who knows shit)

 

WELCOME TO MY WORLD. I HAVE TO DEAL WITH THIS FOR 16 HOURS A DAY ON AVERAGE. 

 

And, all things considered, she’s being rather calm and serious right now. Tachibana, everybody.

 

As for the bullying: Tachibana’s ninety percent over it by now. They say that the best revenge is living well, after all, and for her service, SONG has done everything we can to make sure she’s had a better life. But from what I’ve read, it was pretty bad. Like, ‘people organizing campaigns to go to her house and throw rocks through her window’ bad. 

 

-

 

Guessing/Game

 

I don’t know whether I should envy or pity you SONGbird. On the one hand, she seems like an amazingly sweet girl. On the other hand, I imagine that energy could get tiring over the long run. I guess the real mystery is how Kohinata handles it, eh?

 

Regardless, Q&As started and first up is the asshole brigade. Logical, given last Friday.

 

-

 

Moaron

 

Optimistic sort, isn’t she? Then again, she seems to be assuming the Horsemen want a better world.

 

-

 

Japanese0Groyper

 

@Moaron

 

That’s not much of a consolation. If you think about it, a lot of the worst people in history did some horrible things in the name of making a better world. The Nazis, the Communists, etc. They all justified their actions by saying “once we kill this convenient scapegoat, everything will be sunshine and kittens!” Same with the Horsemen.

 

-

 

Moaron

 

That’s kinda my point though. You read the Horsemen’s statement, they don’t say that getting rid of the relics will make things better. Closest they come is claiming “mankind will be liberated from the Custodians for good.” I mean, that is the other sort of justification these sorts use: “we gotta get these people before they get us”, regardless of how real the threat is precisely, is also the sort of thing ideologues like this like to play. But they seem to be thinking in terms of continuity from the time before the Noise and Gears and everything showed up, rather than changing things for the better. They seem to seek a regression rather than a progression.

 

-

 

Kamen rider 555

 

@Moaron

 

By that sort of logic, Africans seeking freedom from Western imperialism are “seeking regression” because they want to go back to self-rule, to how they were before Europeans ruled them. That’s not really a good argument against the Horsemen on its face. 

 

-

 

SONGbird 

(Confirmed SONG mook)

(Guy who knows shit)

 

@Kamen rider 555

Really? You're really comparing people using a specific form of science to help humanity as a whole, to European colonialism? Really? Even for you, and I haven't got much in the way of faith in your debate, that's a hot take to end all hot takes.

 

-

 

Kamen rider 555

 

@SONGbird

 

If the Four Horsemen are wrong for “wanting to go back,” so are African freedom fighters (who, by the way, often were no less violent). 

 

-

 

Moaron

 

I’d probably be a bit more convinced by the argument if the adaptors had, like, used their powers to murder global leaders and declare themselves Queens of the World rather than submitting themselves to UN oversight and running disaster relief under their auspicious. The comparison strikes me as more apt then.

 

-

 

Master9

(Moderator)

(Archive Junkie)

 

Guys, you are derailing the thread. Take this somewhere else if you want this discussion. We have the Debate threads here.

 

-

 

SONGbird 

(Confirmed SONG mook)

(Guy who knows shit)

 

ANYWAYS. Next question! Looks like they're asking about the- oh geez. Did NOT want them to bring her dad up.

 

-

 

Guessing/Game

 

Was wondering if that was gonna come up. For those who aren’t in the know: according to the dossiers, Tachibana’s pa broke under the pressure of ostracization and left the family. According to the Chiba Prefecture News Tribune article here, the man lost his job and there were rumors he was taking it out physically on his family members before he left. Seems like a thoroughly nasty affair. 

 

-

 

BurnOut

 

Huh. Tachibana’s reply seems to indicate they’ve… I dunno, reconnected and things have gotten better, but still aren’t all the way there?

 

-

Page 3

-

 

SONGbird

(Confirmed SONG mook)

(Guy who knows shit)

 

On the dad scenario: it’s not really my business as her bodyguard to get involved in her family business, so I don’t really know all that much. That said, from what I do know, you would be correct, @BurnOut. They’ve been slowly repairing their relationship.

 

Alright, on to the next questiTACHIBANA WHY

 

-

 

Guessing/Game

 

Aaaaaand we’ve hit a tabloider. Love life rumor nons-

 

BWAHAHAHA! Wow, that was direct. Seems like not even the reporters were expecting that level of raw romanticism. @DoubleTheFun is probably over the moon right now.

 

-

 

Whiteg10

 

Camera on my channel went to Kohinata’s face there. Can’t tell if she’s also over the moon or just wants to die. Calling it now: this is gonna be a meme somehow.

 

-

 

DoubleTheFun

(Inveterate Shipper)


@Guessing/Game Sorry, too busy partying to head up there.

 

-

 

BurnOut

 

So, that was a thing that happened. She’s swapping out with Kohinata at the moment.

 

-

 

SONGbird 

(Confirmed SONG mook)

(Guy who knows shit)

 

Tachibana. Tachibana why you do this. Just. I'm not even surprised. It is literally exactly what she says every other day. And she just. Live television. And she. TACHIBANA WHY.

 

Anyways, Kohinata is next. Here's hoping this goes well.

 

-

 

Moaron

 

She doesn’t seem like she’d be too much of a trouble. Worst thing anybody can rag on her for is agreeing to fall in with Doctor Ver that one time and I’m a bit dubious the reporters will press her on that after the most popular of the adaptor’s just went all glurgy lovebirdy about her.

 

Oh, hey. Maybe that was what Tachibana intended! Clever girl.

 

-

 

SONGbird 

(Confirmed SONG mook)

(Guy who knows shit)

 

Nope. No way Tachibana, she who fails all summer homework ever unless Kazanari and/or Maria help, is that clever. No plan, no acting, I doubt she even thought about she was saying. Just pure, undiluted Tachibana Why Moment. We get these once a week, at the lowest ever recorded. 

 

-

 

Whiteg10

 

Right, well, it’s Miku’s first question and… huh. The released reports weren’t really that detailed on how the Shenshoujin got rebuilt, were they? 

 

And on that note, how the hell was it supposed to contain Shem-Ha anyways?

 

-

 

Moaron

 

Probably the same way it managed to brainwash Kohinata into thinking she could stop her girlfriend from fighting… by fighting her girlfriend. This part of the expose says Shenshoujing was outfitted with a “Direct Feedback Link” that allowed whoever held the remote control to basically pilot its user’s body like a robot.

 

Speaking of, that still isn’t a feature, is it?

 

-

 

SONGbird

(Confirmed SONG mook)

(Guy who knows shit)

 

HAHA Fuck no. In addition to being reprehensible as all hell, Tachibana would literally kill us if that thing was there and Kohinata was sent to fight. I'm not kidding, she really would, especially with what she did during the Frontier Incident. And the others would probably be only seconds behind her. Our R&D removed that thing ASAP. 

 

Not to mention, even leaving aside the morality of it or how the others might react, could you imagine what would happen if like, the Horsemen managed to hijack the control signal? Given some of the cyberwarfare shit they’ve been pulling, most of which I can’t talk about, I wouldn’t put it past them. We’d be right back at the Frontier Incident. Or worse, given their attitude towards her, they might have her basically kill herself. Like hell we’d hand our enemies a killswitch to a seventeen-year old girl!

 

-

 

Guessing/Game

 

You really think Tachibana would get murder happy in reaction to that? Her record indicates the only guy she killed was Adam and he was basically satan. Then again, guess I’d react the same way towards someone deliberately implanting my wife with a no-shit mind control device.

 

-

 

SONGbird 

(Confirmed SONG mook)

(Guy who knows shit)

 

Well, I'm pretty sure everyone here knows what Fusion is. By now anyways. I'd also assume you know what it was doing?

 

-

 

BurnOut

 

Unfortunately, yes. Still pretty damn disturbed by that honestly. Why'd you ask?

 

-

 

SONGbird 

(Confirmed SONG mook)

(Guy who knows shit)

 

When Kohinata showed up all brainwashed during the Frontier Incident, Tachibana hadn't deployed yet. The reason being her condition having advanced enough we were having to give her surgery every time she transformed. When she saw Kohinata, she immediately demanded we let her out to get her back. “I’ll bring her back, even if it kills me!” Word-for-word. Shortly followed by "Then I'll come back alive, even if it kills me!" Because Tachibana laughs at logic. Eventually, we gave in when she managed to come up with an actual plan and let her.

 

You've probably seen that battle footage by now.

 

Now, I'll let you in on something that didn’t make it into the report. Right before Tachibana walked out onto the deck in full badass mode, we measured how long she had left before the overheat from the fusion became fatal, shortly followed by it consuming her completely. Came out to two minutes and forty seconds. 

 

Now take a look at how much time passed before Kohinata lasered them both. She went over it. We don’t know for sure if we just underestimated how much time she had, but common consensus is she managed to fight it back through the raw determination to save her girl. Whilst there were spears made of golden crystal literally exploding out of her body. At the age of sixteen.

 

Yeah. Tachibana will stop at nothing, and I mean NOTHING, if something threatens Kohinata, physically or mentally. Case in point: The Custodian she basically punched out of Kohinata’s body. Now admittedly part of that was Gungnir defying reason, but we have scientific evidence Tachibana makes it defy reason even harder.

 

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Page 4

-

 

Moaron

 

Well, speaking of Shem-Ha, the press conference came back around to her. They’ve hit another tabloid dude right now, but the question before this seems to have actually shaken Kohinata a little. And I can tell why. I can’t even begin to imagine what that’d be like.

 

-

 

Japanese0Groyper

 

I’d imagine it’d be like how demonic possession is often described. It’d fit, considering “Shemhameforash“ is used in used as the LaVeyan Satanism equivalent of 'hallelujah’.

 

-

 

Alola-Aloha-Allaway

(Confirmed Sperg)

 

I wanted to hug her. I’m pretty sure Tachibana did too.

 

-

 

Guessing/Game

 

Righto, and I guess that last question is something of a wrap for it.

 

Now, apparently, the one the reporters have REALLY been waiting for: Chris Yukine.

 

-

 

Kamen rider 555

 

And here we go…

 

-

 

Whiteg10

 

She seems to be holding herself well together, right now at least. Even if it is just the opening speech.

Okay, maybe she’s gripping that podium a little too hard…

 

-

 

BurnOut

 

Okay, first question the trial one. Same as Maria. And… she agrees that she would if called? Points for maturity, I guess.

 

-

 

Alola-Aloha-Allaway

(Confirmed Sperg)

 

Wait, are people seriously arguing that SONG can’t go on the offensive against the Horsemen because they aren’t using H-Tech or A-Tech?

 

-

 

Moaron

 

Well, looking at the SONG charter for a moment, the wording isn’t 100% clear. Paragraph 5 clears them for natural disaster assistance, supernatural incidents, and unregulated heretical/alchemical tech interventions. Paragraph 6 forbids them from intervening in human wars absent the aforementioned caveats, but the wording seems to indicate their talking about interstate conflicts between countries and there isn’t a lot of clarity about civil wars or operations against non-state organizations that aren’t using A-tech or H-tech.

 

Regardless, the argument that the prohibition applies to non-state actors as well is being taken up by some UN members. Most notably, by China.

 

-

 

Kamen rider 555

 

I think we should all realize that SONG doesn’t really have any standards when it comes to their actions. They just do whatever they want, protocols and procedures be damned, because they think of themselves as the good guys. The only difference between them and the Horsemen by this point is the red tape.

 

-

 

SONGbird 

(Confirmed SONG mook)

(Guy who knows shit)

 

OKAY. So. I thought that earlier was a giant fucking hot take, but this crock of bullshit? Yeah I'm sick of this. Are you, or are you not, on the Horsemen's side? Because you've stated you aren't, but literally everything else you say indicates otherwise.

 

-

 

Kamen rider 555

 

I’m on the side of people who care about rule of law and accountability. It appears SONG isn’t in favor of those things any more than the Four Horsemen are.

 

And, what do you know? Yukine’s being hysterical at the same time you are, @SONGbird. The irony! How much longer before she threatens to use Ichival against a curious unarmed civilian for daring to question her again? Seems to be a common thread among SONG members: one set of rules for us regular people, and another for SONG, and questioning this results in threats of violence. 

 

-

 

SONGbird 

(Confirmed SONG mook)

(Guy who knows shit)

 

Oh my God they actually asked that question. Just. Oh my God. They actually just asked her if she looked at the brother of the only person from her life pre-Val Verde still alive at the time and shot his leg off for fun. On the day the civil war kicks off again and they might well have died. Oh my God.

 

-

 

Master9

(Moderator)

(Archive Junkie)

 

HOKAY! That’s enough of that!

 

Kamen, consider this a threadban and take some infractions. Pretty clear you’re trying to rile up SONGbird. I’m not going to have this thread become basically a fight between two angry Yukine’s. SONGbird, I’m gonna give you just this warning for the moment because you’re our Guy-In-The-Know: Don’t take the bait.

 

-

 

Guessing/Game

 

Well, that was a yikes. Both here and in the conference. Yukine honestly looked like she was going to go ape there for a moment before they escorted her off.

 

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Page 5

-

 

Moaron

 

I looked into it and this leaked AAR did cover the issue. Apparently, the kid’s leg had been latched onto by some Alca-Noise and she did it to save his life. Although what was that about him being the brother of the only person from her life pre-Val Verde? @SONGbird?

 

-

 

SONGbird 

(Confirmed SONG mook)

(Guy who knows shit)

 

Stephan Virena is the brother of Sonya Virena. She travelled with Yukine and her family whilst they were trying to help out. When the bombs went off, she and Yukine were the only survivors. And then a slave trafficker kidnapped Yukine whilst they were seperated. The Val Verde intervention was the first time they'd seen each other since, and they only started talking to each other regularly towards the end of the Illuminati Incident. When we got the news about the civil war kicking off, there were and are fears that Sonya might've been killed. And they just walked up to Yukine and asked her if she shot Stephan's leg off for fun.

 

-

 

Alola-Aloha-Allaway

(Confirmed Sperg)

 

Yikes. No wonder she went off like that. What unfortunate timing… 

 

I’m guessing the whole “shooting their legs off for fun” thing is a lie. The reports on the incident said there were some civilians injured by Alca-Noise.  

 

-

 

BurnOut

 

Well, the original question was whether she thought there was a better way of doing it. Yukine responded with angry exasperation and another reporter followed up. The exact words from him was:

 

“We feel as if the public needs concrete answers on these matters. We doubt they would be very happy if they thought someone with the power to lay waste to entire sections of a city just found an excuse to shoot off someone's leg for fun.”

 

So he didn’t directly accuse her of such, merely implied the possibility that was the case.

 

-

 

Whiteleg10

 

Well that's… I'd say it's better, but it really isn't that much better. Seriously awful time to make that implication.

 

-

 

Japanese0Groyper

 

Seriously, only corporate media nonsense could make me side with a United Nations organization. Just screw them.

 

-

 

Moaron

 

Moving on from that trash show, Akatsuki’s coming up. I doubt what happened with Yukine helped her at all. She seems terrified the reporters are going to lynch her or something.

 

-

 

Alola-Aloha-Allaway

(Confirmed Sperg)

 

I mean, if one considers the lynching metaphorical, they actually might.

 

-

 

Guessing/Game

 

Well, first question… and we got a tabloider. Normally, I’d go goddammit, but honestly, I think the girl would rather answer something like tha-

 

And she said it. DTF in 3, 2, 1...

 

-

 

DoubleTheFun

(Inveterate Shipper)

 

Christmas came in summer for the shippers! ShiraKiri CONFIRMED!

 

-

 

Moaron

 

Huh, strange. Kohinata and Tachibana actually looked a bit brighter after answering their own love life questions. Akatsuki though, she actually looked a little sadder. @SONGbird, please don’t tell me we have another Yukine on our hands?

 

-

 

SONGbird

(Confirmed SONG mook)

(Guy who knows shit)

 

Not… exactly. I really do not want to go into it, but Akatsuki… isn't always as okay as she tries to convince us she is. Tachibana can be the same way, really. Neither of them will admit it if their upset about something, save maybe to their girlfriends. Tachibana is usually fine these days, but this is starting to get worrying. It's been a long time since I've seen Akatsuki this bad, and I really don't want to talk about the last time.

 

-

 

Guessing/Game

 

She got asked why she stuck with Ver. Damn, she looks like a kicked puppy, and I think even the reporters are feeling bad for-

 

Wait, what? She thought she had Fine’s consciousness? What the hell? I thought that was Tsukiyomi?

 

-

 

BurnOut

 

Ah, she’s getting a follow up on that. Looks like it was a perceptual problem. 

 

-

 

SONGbird 

Confirmed SONG mook 

Guy who knows shit 

 

Basically yes. She thought she used Finé's Asgard barrier, but it turned out it was Tsukiyomi that was the reincarnation. It was quite confusing for all. 

 

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Page 6

-

 

Alola-Aloha-Allaway

(Confirmed Sperg)

 

She’s getting the same trial question as Yukine and Maria. And god, here I thought I wanted to hug Kohinata but Akatsuki…

 

-

 

SONGbird 

Confirmed SONG mook 

Guy who knows shit 

 

Oh no. Oh that wasn't a good sign. Oh this is bad.

 

-

 

Whiteg10

 

Huh? What’s wrong? I mean, the answer was pretty straightforward to me, if a bit despondent. “I’ll do it if called, but please leave my loved ones be”.

 

-

 

BurnOut

 

I’m not a psychiatrist, but my Mom was. This is looking like a case of depression to me.

 

-

 

Japanese0Groyper

 

My guess is that it has something to do with what the expose says on Kirika’s psychological state. Low self-esteem, self-hatred, and even suicidal thoughts are listed. It sounds like she’s over the worst of it according to the analysis, but it’s left her with a “strong desire to prove to herself that she’s not ‘useless’, even at the detriment of her own health and safety.” It seems like overanxious teenage girl troubles turned up to eleven by her unusual life circumstances.

 

-

 

BurnOut

 

Again, speaking from what I gathered from my mom’s work, that doesn’t look like she’s over the worst of it. Then again, that profile is from December. My guess, internet diagnosis it may be: we’re looking at a relapse.

 

-

 

SONGbird 

(Confirmed SONG mook)

(Guy who knows shit)

 

That yes. Oh this is really really bad.

 

They’ve let her off, thank God. It seems like the AC has enough sense to recognize a potential shitshow when he sees it.

 

-

 

Alola-Aloha-Allaway

(Confirmed Sperg)

 

They’re switching and… oh, huh. Tsukuyomi hugged her? That’s good. She needs that.

 

-

 

DoubleTheFun

(Inveterate Shipper)

 

It’s like something out of an epic. The quiet, gentle Tsukuyomi comforts her outwardly extroverted but long-suffering girlfriend.

 

My attempt to lighten the mood aside by being myself aside, my heart does go out to Akatsuki. I hope she gets through this okay.

 

-

 

Guessing/Game

 

Right, up comes Tsukuyomi and… that is some stare. You can almost hear the “jii”. Wouldn’t want to take her on in poker, that’s for sure.

 

-

 

SONGbird 

(Confirmed SONG mook)

(Guy who knows shit)

 

Everyone always thinks they actually do hear a “jii” when she does that. Actually it's her nickname from how often it happens. Like how Akatsuki gets called DMG (Dark Magician Girl) for looking like a yu-gi-oh card. And because she has this verbal tic you guys might have noticed. That whole “desu” thing she tacks on. Which is actually her saying death in English for some reason. No, we don't know why.

 

-

 

Alola-Aloha-Allaway

(Confirmed Sperg)

 

Oh, so THAT’S why I thought Akatsuki’s transformed costume looks familiar. Old card game.

 

-

 

BurnOut

 

“Death”? That’s kinda morbid… 

 

-

 

Guessing/Game

 

I’m sure it’s a cultural thing. Maybe @Japanese0Groyper might be able to give us some insight. Regardless, first question is up and it’s why she decided to defect. Self-doubt, followed by a personal reason being the last straw.

 

-

 

Japanese0Groyper

 

It’s a fucking pun. And a terrible one at that.

 

“Desu” is something you tack onto the end of sentences when trying to speak politely in Japanese. It literally means “is” or “are.” However, thanks to the moe revolution and the formation of  global otaku culture in the early 21st century, it’s become a total meme on the Internet. (“Suki Suki Desu!” being one such meme). Since “desu” sounds a bit like “death” in English, Akatsuki probably started saying it for the lulz. Maybe to cheer herself or others up in the orphanage.

 

-

Page 7

-

 

SONGbird 

(Confirmed SONG mook)

(Guy who knows shit)

 

Wait. THAT'S WHAT THAT MEANT!?!? I've been driving myself up a wall trying to figure out why she keeps putting a word in English at the end of every other sentence for almost two years now, and it’s a fucking pun!?

 

-

 

Guessing/Game

 

Aren’t you Japanese? Or at least, you live in Japan, given how most of SONG bases out of there.

 

-

 

SONGbird 

(Confirmed SONG mook)

(Guy who knows shit)

 

Oh yeah, I'm Japanese for sure. Making sure Tachibana doesn't do something dumb and get herself killed on accident requires living in the same general area as her, after all. But seriously, we have been trying to figure this out on my end for two friggin years. And it's a pun. Two years and she  was making a bad pun. I am going to be having words with people later. After the entirety of SONG's security section finish banging our heads off the nearest wall.

 

-

 

BurnOut

 

Well, it’s not like us Americans always get the intricacies of our own language and culture. Anyways, Tsukuyomi gets a question about her life in the orphanage. And she’s… very short and sparse on the details.

 

I get the impression she isn’t very happy with the press at the moment.

 

-

 

Alola-Aloha-Allaway

(Confirmed Sperg)

 

Gee, ya think? After they’ve been hounding the adaptors for more than a week now? And the pressure has apparently caused a relapse in her girlfriend’s suicidal depression? I wouldn’t be very happy either.

 

Hopefully, after this conference, the press backs the fuck off.

 

-

 

Guessing/Game

 

A fair point. In any case, a question about whether Fine’s presence influenced her at all. And… that is an interesting thought, isn’t it? I mean, how would you know in that case if what you were saying and doing was because of you or because of some other person?

 

-

 

Moaron

 

You say interesting. I say “creepy.” It’s your identity and free will being eroded by some foreign thing inside of you. Brrrr. 

 

-

 

BurnOut

 

Yeah, we already saw that Akatsuki didn’t handle it well. I don’t think I could handle that either. Interesting still may fit, but it’d be the Chinese sort of interesting.

 

-

 

Guessing/Game

 

True, guess the intellectual issue got ahead of the emotional implications for me there. Regardless, next query is about how precisely Fine got dealt with and uh…

 

Okay, yeah, she’s definitely done with the media. Just a straightforward “no”.

 

-

 

SONGbird 

(Confirmed SONG mook)

(Guy who knows shit)

 

And before anyone asks: I ain't saying it. Let's just say that "distressing" is the understatement of the fucking century. I do not wish to face the wrath of Tsukiyomi, and the old commander made the decision to leave it out of the official report for a reason. Hell no. At any rate next questOH JESUS CHRIST NO

 

-

 

Whiteg10

 

Well that’s reasonable enough.

 

Uh. What’s going on? Is Akatsuki having a breakdown?

 

-

 

Guessing/Game

 

Tachibana’s up, apologizing for the interruption and saying she can’t let Akatsuki suffer. I think I’m detecting a hint of panic in Tsukiyomi as well. And… looks like the AC’s canning it. Don’t blame him, even if it’s a bit early. Most of the reporters seem just as taken aback as we are. Tsukuyomi’s moving for Akatsuki FAST.

 

And yeah, this is over.

 

-

 

SONGbird 

(Confirmed SONG mook)

(Guy who knows shit)

 

CONFERENCE OVER.

NO OBJECTIONS, WE'RE DONE.

SEE YOU GUYS LATER.

 

-

 

Moaron

 

Well… usually this is the place where @Japanese0Groyper gives their two-cent summary but, uh, given that shitshow I understand if you don’t want too…

 

-

 

Japanese0Groyper

 

This entire outing was an utter shitshow. Only a handful of the questions were any good, and those questions got short non-answers, two of the Adaptors started breaking down in the middle of the event and had to be pulled off stage before they embarrass themselves further, and there were still. Fucking. Tabloids!

 

*Throws hands up in the air in futility and walks away*

 

-

Page 10

-

 

SONGbird 

(Confirmed SONG mook)

(Guy who knows shit)

 

Okay, panic over. I think. Akatsuki… seems to have come out of it, but the adapters are kind of all in a ball around her right now. I think Tachibana is organising an impromptu training session so Yukine and Akatsuki can blow stuff up. 

 

Anyways, if you guys have questions now's the time.

 

-

 

BurnOut

 

Honestly, @SONGbird? I think you should take a break. After today, I feel as if SONG in general and the girls in particular deserve a goddamn break. And if your AC didn’t strike me as too polite to do so, I’d expect him to be tearing the Security Council a new one for having to make you guys do this.

 

-

 

SONGbird 

(Confirmed SONG mook)

(Guy who knows shit)

 

Yeah, break sounds nice. And now I'm thinking about how the old man would react to this shit. Oh boy you would've heard him reading the security council the riot act on the opposite side of the earth. I need to sleep…

 

-

 

Chapter Text

OMAKE: Supernatural Forums, Part 3: Still Not a PHO Interlude

 

THREAD: WTF Happened in Chiba? (EDIT: Confirmed Horsemen Terrorist Attack, Confirmed Symphogear Involvement)

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Page 1

-

Moaron

So, while everyone's been waiting for the media blackout on whatever the Marine Corps is doing down in Panau to be lifted, this happened. Cameraphone video footage of what appears to be Hibiki Tachibana trashing an SUV in her gear armor, followed by dragging two dudes out through the windshield, then a stand-off between her and some blacksuit holding what appears to be a family member (I’m guessing either her Dad or an Uncle given appearance and that she’s an only-child) at gunpoint before the guy gets thwacked over the head by an old lady. Then the footage gets blocked by a different suit. Is our Guy in the Know around to clarify what happened?

EDIT: Okay, something DEFINITELY just went down in Chiba. Reports of a shooting at a local junior high school. What is this, 2010s America?

EDIT2: More cameraphone footage of the shooting incident, filmed from the Junior High’s window. It gets bloody, so likely NSFW. Centerpiece is what appears to be Miku Kohinata trying to defend what appears to be a crashed SONG chopper and some students against a metric fuckton of armed thugs. Tachibana shows up as well mid-way through. It’s… actually kinda scary to watch, even if the guys they’re butchering seem to be total douchebags.

EDIT3: And we’ve got an official statement. It’s the Horsemen, as I’m sure everyone’s guessed by now. Tried to kidnap Tachibana’s family and kill Kohinata’s when SONG tried to evac them. The kids defended their parents and bystanders as best they could. Current casualty count is 9 dead students and 1 wounded but they’re saying it could have easily been dozens if Kohinata hadn’t been there. Casualties among the attackers are… still being counted.

-

Guessing/Game

Wow. That was… intense. Did she smash that SUV’s engine block by LANDING on it?

-

Japanese0Groyper

My guess? Relic bullshit. 

The bigger question is “what happened?” Did somebody try and kidnap her family? 

-

BurnOut

Well, if it was just “someone”, as in some rando, then I’m sure SONG could’ve handled it without having to pull in a living meteor of a girl. My guess is it was a bit more organized and premeditated than that. Dollar’s on the Horsemen.

-

Alola-Aloha-Allaway
(Confirmed Sperg)

I’ll take that bet.

-

BurnOut

Okay, this just popped up on my newsfeed and it’s in the same general area so it might be related, given the timing and all. Reports of considerable gunfire and even explosions at a Junior High School in the area.

-

Moaron

Added that to the front page. The article is updating, but some reports of some kinda beam weapons as well? Wait… doesn’t Kohinata use energy weapons?

-

Whiteg10

Why’d Kohinata be at some middle school?

-

BurnOut

Publicity performance?

-

Japanese0Groyper

She isn’t an idol. Only Maria and Kazanari are idols and their activity has been through the floor for the last few weeks for obvious reasons.

-

Page 3

-

SONGbird
(Confirmed SONG Mook)
(Guy who knows shit)

WELP.

So, as you've probably guessed, that was in fact Tachibana. And her dad. And then her and Kohinata. So to explain what in the actual fuck happened there:

At roughly nine this morning, Tachibana and Kohinata decided to actually talk to their families about the fact they're dating. And yes, Tachibana announced it on live television before telling her parents. Because Tachibana. The two of them, me and my team, our opposite numbers in Team Kohinata, and the replacement Intelligence Director (Director from here on) all buggered off to Chiba, and all was well. And then the Director realised Kohinata's house was bugged to shit. And before you ask: yes, it was the Horsemen. On a related note, I fucking called it.

Now I was on break at the time (that was a damn nice soba too) but was abruptly no longer on break after I got called in to evac the Tachibanas. Unfortunately, the Horsemen beat me to it, the bastards. The aforementioned members of the asshole brigade pretended they were my team and I, insisted to Tachibana's family (including her dad, who was visiting for the day) that they were in imminent danger, and attempted to drive off with them. Fortunately for everyone, the Tachibanas immediately realised something was up when the impersonator squad failed at multiple basic Tachibana Hibiki Facts, and Grandma Tachibana hit her medical alarm, which allowed my team and I to track them easily. What followed was the most high-stress car chase of my job as we attempted to catch the little shits. However, they proved surprisingly good get-away drivers and were frustrating my team immensely with their refusal to get caught already.

It was at roughly this moment that an extremely angry Tachibana Hibiki was airdropped directly on top of them.

The first two jackassess were promptly Gungnir'ed, alongside their car. However, the last jackass decided to put a gun at her dad’s head. Fortunately, the situation was resolved when Tachibana's ninety something grandma walked up to the world's unluckiest Horseman and smacked him over the head with the mini-weight in her purse, KO-ing the guy.

Tachibana came by her absurdity honestly, folks.

Alas, the day was not done with us yet, and the Horsemen shot down the helicopter getting the Kohinatas the hell out of there. Fortunately, due to the quick reactions of our pilots, they only hit the tail, allowing Kohinata to transform and recover the situation. Unfortunately, she 1) wound up touching down in her former middle school's yard and 2) got ambushed by like a few hundred Horsemen literally seconds after hitting the ground. Said Horsemen ignored all the civilians completely when they were in the crossfire, because assholes. Of course certain people are gonna completely ignore this because BUT THE RELICS because of course they will. Lucky for those kids, Kohinata was still transformed and successfully held out until Tachibana did a dynamic entry and fought off the remaining assailants.

We've since evacuated all Tachibanas and Kohinatas to HQ, and are currently handling the aftermath. Hopefully, them attempting to either kidnap or murder the kid's families will convince China that this is in fact our fucking problem, but given their recent string of stupidity, I'm not optimistic.

Questions away. I'll be here a while.

-

DoubleTheFun
(Inveterate Shipper)

Normally, this would be the part where I’d gush about Kohinata and Tachibana being a battle couple. But I can’t because, uh, I gotta admit: that footage was really disturbing to watch. Not just because Kohinata started butchering those guys, but because she pretty apparently had to start butchering them in order to actually stop them.

I mean, what the literal fuck is up with the Horsemen’s dudes? That guy at 14:38 had his arm severed by Kohinata’s whip-cable-things and he reacted by just trying to punch her with his other hand. And he wasn’t even the only one who had something like that happen.

Not caring if civilians get caught in the crossfire is one thing; we’ve seen that from terrorist jackasses before. But ignoring wounds that should have left one paralyzed on the ground from the shock alone?

-

Protector27
(Confirmed Alca-Noise Survivor)

I have to wonder about that too. Not just because of how they individually reacted, but how they reacted as a group to their losses. If you ever read any decent tactical military accounts, you see that most forces rout at about 20-33% losses (depending on the specific circumstances) if they're amongst the most suicidally brave forces in history. Yet those guys in the school video never even so much as flinched, no matter how many of them went down. I’ve only ever seen one force be willing to take losses like that and keep attacking, and it wasn’t a human force.

Not to mention, being willing to charge a Gear with nothing but a fist or combat knife after they’ve smashed your rifle? Fuck, from what I’ve read of the kids’ combat capabilities, I wouldn’t feel comfortable taking them on with anything short of a Davy Crockett. Yet these guys were willing to unhesitatingly hurl themselves at the girls with nothing but their bare hands? That isn’t suicidal. That’s beyond suicidal. That’s outright sacrificial.

-

Kalenda
(Confirmed Noise survivor)
(Confirmed Frontier Incident Veteran)

… Okay, gotta admit. That song Kohinata was singing? Bad memories of it. Haven't heard that… sound since she took out a carrier battlegroup. Still, the way these guys are acting is fucking scary. Fucking hell, Force Recon would've broken in the first minute of that and they just kept coming! The hell are these guys!?

-

Japanese0Groyper

How’s this for a question that hasn’t been raised yet: how did nobody notice the Kohinatas were bugged until today? You do have guys checking on the parents regularly, right @SONGbird?

-

SONGbird
(Confirmed SONG Mook)
(Guy who knows shit)

@DoubleTheFun
@Protector27
Remember how back when I was talking to you all about the ambush that started all this nonsense I mentioned that literally every single one of the Horsemen soldiers involved literally killed themselves to try and make even a scratch on the girls? To the point of physically bashing themselves to pieces on the kids armour? Yeah I wasn't fucking kidding. You get to see it for yourself in the vid. These guys are freaking psychopaths. I wish I could tell you why, but it’s still classified. We’ve been pretty open about what’s happening for the most part, but the higher-ups are judging to save some things until after the Horsemen are brought to justice.

Suffice it to say it's why the kids were going all in there. Normally, they’re supposed to keep things non-lethal. Hell, they’ve been trained to avoid basic injury against human personnel if they can manage it. But we learned the first time around that these guys won’t stop attacking until they are at least knocked out, and no matter how much Tachibana tries to hold back when she needs to punch an actual person, she's still punching a biologically normal human being with the fist that defeated Shem-Ha. There's only so much she can do once things escalate that far.

@Kalenda
Sorry to hear it. If it makes it any easier, most of SONG had a heart attack when we heard that song again. Tachibana almost flipped out altogether. Considering she basically died the last time we heard it, I don't blame her. Fortunately, it seems to have just been the usual sort of song that the Gears fall back onto when the kids need to generate a bit more power for some reason (this is the most succinct, non-classified explanation of the phenomenon) and not any indication of the Direct Feedback System. That was a relief when we realized it.

@Japanese0Groyper
We did. I am having WORDS with my guys for not noticing this. To be fair, though, even the Director said he almost didn’t spot them and the Director… well, I don’t know his exact history, but suffice to say he’s good. Very good. As in, he's the AC's big brother good.

Unfortunately, that probably means the guys the Horsemen have for this sort of thing are also pretty damn good.

-

Alola-Aloha-Allaway
(Confirmed Sperg)

How are they handling it? The tail end of the video shows Tachibana cradling what I presume was the wounded girl until that teacher came out to help them. They looked pretty upset.

-

BurnOut

I’m… a little bit concerned about longer-term mental implications here. Overcoming one's willingness to kill a human being isn’t a mental hurdle that is crossed lightly and reviewing the girl’s records, only Maria ever directly crossed that threshold before now.

-

Japanese0Groyper

I wish that I could get into the minds of the Horsemen because they make absolutely no fucking sense. I’d like for them to make some kind of public statement so that they could explain why they’re doing this shit. This has gone way beyond “relics are dangerous, guys.” What is all of this supposed to accomplish? Making everyone hate them?

-

SONGbird
(Confirmed SONG mook) 
(Guy who knows shit)

@Alola-Aloha-Allaway 
Not well. Not as badly as we feared. They've been training for this since we figured out the classified thing, but switching from fighting hordes of opponents with nothing resembling humanity that didn't even leave bodies with the occasional person just as powerful as them to having to mow down small armies of people with nothing approaching a chance who leave blood everywhere when they bite it is a hell of a fucking jump. Honestly though, it's the other kids that are what's causing the issues. Tachibana might have some extremely poor memories of that school, but those kids never even met her and they didn't do anything except happen to be in the Horsemen's way. I can't even start to guess what she's thinking.

@BurnOut
So is literally everyone here. We've been freaking out about what making them get through that wall will do to the kids since the ambush. Maria genuinely had a flashback on us the first time they used the sims, I damn near had a heart attack when Tachibana noticed and started panicking. I know for a fact that Kazanari at the least is seriously worried about what might happen if they have another Val Verde type mission when this is done, because they're having to teach themselves to not hold back against people with guns. And once again, they're ignoring us when we try to help. Fucking Horsemen.

@Japanese0Groyper
I wish I knew the answer to that question. They genuinely do not seem to have any motivation beyond "hurt the kids". 

-

Kalenda
(Confirmed Noise Survivor)
(Confirmed Frontier Incident veteran)

Don't blame Tachibana for freaking a little. I don't like to talk about that day, but I saw her and Kohinata going at it, from a lot closer than what the vids show too. I swear to God, the poor kid must've been barely conscious from the pain… hats off to her grandma, though. Seriously, ninety something and she KO'd a Horseman? Damn girl.

-

SONGbird
(Confirmed SONG mook)
(Guy who knows shit)

@Kalenda 
Yeah, she doesn't talk about it but I'm pretty sure Tachibana has some problems from that day. Even she isn't going to come out of literally killing herself by Fusion (her heart literally stopped, no shit) without some nasty memories.

On a more light hearted note: Yeah, the Tachibanas are pretty much just badass central from what I've heard. Even her dad, and the man can't go ten seconds without calling himself a coward and a failure of a parent.

-

DoubleTheFun
(Inveterate shipper)

Wait, wait. Her heart stopped!? So you're telling me Kohinata actually... oh my God that entire event is literally Disney romance. The gallant Tachibana sacrificing her life for the one she loves, only to be saved by her in turn. Perfect.

-

Moaron 

Really? I mean, I don't disagree with the man - what I've heard didn't give me the best impression of him - but what makes you think otherwise?

-

SONGbird 
(Confirmed SONG mook)
(Guy who knows shit)

Well. There was that time he threw rocks at Carol Malus Dienham. That definitely earned him some points.

To explain; Carol had ambushed Tachibana and knocked Gungnir away from her so she couldn't transform. She was in the middle of monolouging, but unfortunately for her, Tachibana Dad happened to be in the area whilst trying to reconnect with his kid (the situation was still a mess at the time). Turns out, the man actually suspected Tachibana was the adapter on TV the entire time, but hadn't known for sure. He saw the pendant, guessed it was important and- on nothing but a gut feeling- the above happened. And then the man went back to insisting he was a total coward and terrible dad. The Tachibana family, people.

-

Page 4

-

BurnOut

…Okay, I'll admit it, hats off to Tachibana Dad. Holy shit. Damn, if I had Carol in front of me I'd be running for my life!

-

SONGbird 
(Confirmed SONG mook)
(Guy who knows shit) 

Hah, yeah, definitely one of the more badass things I've seen. Anyways, I'm going to be busy for a while: Tachibana Dad just re-proposed and got a resounding "yes," and I can hear Tachibana screaming her head off from the other end of HQ - so to end off the day - behold. Tachibana Hibiki, in all her glory. Laid low by her sole weakness:

Her grandma.

And she is never, ever living this down by the way.

-

Thread: The Battle of Panau (EDIT: Second Horsemen facility in Japan raided)

Protector27
(Confirmed Alca-Noise Survivor)

So... after two days of rumors and waiting, the UN finally agreed to release information on what the hell happened in Panau. Turns out, they tracked down a major Four Horsemen base in the region. Though Panau’s a Chinese ally, the Americans apparently managed to convince the PRC to let them send in the Marines. SONG was permitted to watch from the sidelines and this confirms where Kazanari and Yukine have disappeared off to since Tuesday, but the UN apparently forbid them from deploying unless there were clear signs of A-tech or H-tech. So good old Uncle Sam gave them a thwacking, right?

Well, not quite. The whole thing apparently almost turned into a catastrophe and the entire Marine Expeditionary Force dispatched almost was shattered. Only the deployment of the two Gear’s (Chris Yukine and Tsubasa Kazanari) managed to salvage the situation, and they only got sent out because of a sensor-analysis error. There was also apparently an exchange of fire between Chinese and American units that led to the whole PLA contingent almost attacking into the Marines rear, but the investigation into that is still ongoing.

Now the rest of this is RUMINT, since apparently they’ve classified something like three-quarters of the details of the battle, and I don’t know how much our Guy in the Know (@SONGbird) is permitted to share, but rumors are flying that while the Horsemen didn’t deploy any A-tech or H-tech, they utilized some serious kinda drone technology. It’s apparently a major reason why the Marine assault almost got thwacked.

On a lighter note, my Marine friends have been telling me that there are new nicknames for Tsubasa Kazanari and Chris Yukine circulating the Corps. Their getting called “Samurai” and “MegaDeth”, respectively. Guess our supergirls finally got some superhero names, eh?

EDIT: And a second little surprise released today: SONG’s homebound adaptors found and hit a Horsemen facility just outside of Tokyo. Not very much in the way of details there, though.

And then they apparently went to a hotsprings, judging by this resort’s social media page.

-

Kalenda
(Confirmed Noise survivor) 
(Confirmed Frontier Incident veteran)

"Shattered" puts it mildly. We almost got our fucking asses handed to us on a silver platter. I was in the rearest echelon to ever rear echelon and I still almost died. Mostly because of those fucking… well, let’s call them “drones” or “UGVs” for now, same difference and won’t get me in trouble with the censors. Those things ignored everything we threw at them except the Symphogear duo’s weapons. I'm pretty sure the kids actually got hurt by those things, and I can't say how terrifying that was in English.

-

Alola-Aloha-Allaway
(Confirmed Sperg)

Hell, Kalenda. I know we’ve had our differences, but like hell if I want to hear that you got hurt. Are you okay?

Did you see them? The girls? What were they like?

-

Moaron

Wait. The Horsemen came up with a drone that can hurt a transformed adapter?! HOW?! I mean, SONGbird has been bitching about these guy's tech since we found out they existed, but if the thing that got them deployed was a sensor error, that means these guys have a weapon that can actually hurt Gears without A-Tech or H-Tech! What sort of bullshit are these guys using?

-

Kalenda
(Confirmed Noise survivor)
(Confirmed Frontier Incident veteran )

@Moaron 
After some inquiries on what the NDA will let me say, all I can say is it’s a form of energy weapon, and it was BULLSHIT. I think me and my buddies just joined SONGbird on team bullshit calling from across the Pacific, because WHAT. THE. FUCK. Fortunately, it doesn’t seem to be able to hurt Gears that much. They managed to shrug off the hits and keep going, but what it does to regular people…

Well, I’m gonna be having some nights with the unit therapist, again, I’ll say that much.

@Alola-Aloha-Allaway
Yeah, I'm good. A few scrapes I'll be feeling for a while, but I'm still on the field. Not that there's much left around here capable of fighting after the ‘Gears went through. Maybe the Chinese, if they decide to have a go. Their forces have been eyeing us, but otherwise they keep to themselves. We’re due to pull out in a couple of more days, once salvage operations are finished.

Not much, but a good friend of mine ended up getting Megadeth for artillery support. My God but that missile barrage was a thing of beauty. Think he was with her for about a couple of minutes before she found something else she needed to blow the hell up. Apparently she's exactly as abrasive as SONGbird said she is. For reference, Megadeth comes from her missiles: apparently they have special attack names for what they can do. And her missile ones all go  "Megadeth Whatever", so that's how that started.

-

BurnOut

How do you feel about the fact she’s apparently been recommended for the Bronze Star? You’ve kinda harped on her in the past, after all.

-

Kalenda
(Confirmed Noise survivor)
(Confirmed Frontier Incident veteran)

Let's just say that if the CO asked for signatures my name would be on that list before he was even done with the formalese. Hell, jack it up to the Silver Star whilst we're at it and I know a few grunts who would argue for a Medal of Honor even though she isn’t a citizen. She fucking earned that medal. Samurai too. She single handedly turned the attack on the main base they had underground into a flawless victory. Not that I know much about that, apparently they found something down there that's been classified to hell and back. As in, the dudes who were there can’t even admit they were there levels of classified, so all I have are a bunch of “you didn’t hear this from me” sorta rumors. All I know from my buddies is that she freaked the hell out when they found whatever it was.

-

Whiteg10

Not sure I like the idea of something that can frighten a Symphogear user.

-

Kalenda 
(Confirmed Noise survivor)
(Confirmed Frontier Incident veteran)

Neither do I. Didn't see her after things were over myself, but apparently she was seriously shook up.

-

Japanese0Groyper

Wait, which ones which again?

-

Burnout

Megadeth is Chris Yukine.

Samurai is Tsubasa Kazanari.

-

SONGbird
(Confirmed SONG mook) 
(Guy who knows shit)

I HAVE ARRIVED.

So, to explain what the fuck happened:

Last week we all teamed up with several intelligence agencies to successfully track down a major Four Horsemen facility in Panau. Normally that would be the signal to send Tachibana to punch said facility into the next dimension, but China are still being idiots and insisting the terrorists whose primary goal is killing all Symphogear adaptors somehow aren't our problem. That, and White Noise making us leery of a full deployment. Instead, we sent in Kazanari and Yukine as "observers" in case we caught the asshole brigade lying. Meanwhile American forces moved in with them to see how the Horsemen dealt with an actual military opponent rather than SONG's admittedly slightly schizophrenic setup. It literally jumps from me to the higher ups to the kids with nothing bigger than a person except deployment units like our helis. We are not set up for this kind of fight.

Anyways, so there they were, the sub, two of the kids, the AC, and the Alchemical Gremlin all off to Panau whilst the rest of us (myself included) sat back twiddling our thumbs in case White Noise started shit. Of course, the kidnapping attempt happened, and the gang back in Japan were suddenly rather busy. Around the same time I was driving through the streets of Chiba after some frustratingly slippery Horsemen, the Marine Expeditionary Force charged in and the fighting started. At first things were going well, for a given standard of well. The marines kicked a hell of a lot of ass, hats off to @Kalenda and co. for that…

Aaaand then they noticed the Horsemen hadn't deployed any heavy armour. And then realised why they hadn't deployed any of their armour when the first battle tanks that did show up turned out to have FUCKING RAILGUNS. Which could fire faster than the armor the marines brought. Keep in mind that this was the least bullshit thing they threw at them here. The most bullshit thing, if you've been paying attention to @Kalenda, was the drones. Seriously those things were fucking ridiculous and not in a funny way. They went against an entire MEF and tore almost clean through it in less than 5 minutes. With zero casualties. COMPLETE. BULLSHIT. And don't get me started on what the Alchemical Gremlin IDed their main weapon as. When I got that bit of news I basically stopped believing what little of the Horsemen's bullshitting I hadn't already, because it is literally physically impossible for them to have that weapon based off pure high tech. It should be centuries from even being tested to see if it actually works outside of theory.

Thankfully, we got either the worst timed sensor fuckup of all time, or the best timed sensor fuckup of all time, and the readouts all started loudly blaring that the drones were giving off readings from an A-Tech power plant. As to why they believed the readouts… I can't say much, but the kids recognised something about how they moved. We eventually confirmed their and our suspicions were completely correct for the wrong reasons. Again, I can't say much.

After that sequence of screw ups, panicked realisations, and general chaos, the Missile Of Deployment was pressed into service once again, and the girls started delivering the ass kicking. As Kalenda mentioned, the drone's weapons, as well as the freaking railguns, were able to slightly hurt the kids, but they were being forced to hold back massively because of all the Anti-LiNKER the Horsemen kept tossing at them and the actual damage amounted to a few burn marks and some bruises. After they went in, they broke through the Horsemen’s defenses and successfully fought through to the entrance to the underground base, with the marines following them in once the big nasties were down. Then Kazanari led the push into said base, whilst Yukine continued putting out fires across the battlefield so the marines could get back in the game. A few hours after the kids hopped into the Missile Of Deployment, the fighting was more or less over.

Alright, that's basically it. Questions away!

-

Burnout

Drones that can tank military-grade weaponry and equipped with armaments that can hurt a geared-up adaptor? What are they built out of?

-

Kalenda
(Confirmed Noise survivor)
(Confirmed Frontier Incident veteran)

Concentrated bullshit, from what I've gathered. We couldn't dent literally anything they put that stuff on without asking Megadeth to blow it sky high or Samurai to slice it up. It's some sort of composite like Chobham, but that's all I know. They built their tanks out of the same stuff. Or perhaps similar stuff.

And now that SONGbird has said it, I'm starting to think I know what the girls found familiar. Well, hopefully the UN acknowledge that. Because if that means what I think it means, the Horsemen are lying bastards.

-

Whiteg10

Well, if Horsemen’s tech be bullshit, it’s nice to know that the Gears are apparently even more bullshit. Now if only the UN would go a fair bit easier on them...

-

Page 2

-

Moaron

Apparently the girls at home weren’t to be outdone. Joint SONG-JSDF statement that the other adaptors spearheaded another raid west of Tokyo, but that’s pretty much all the details that have been released. Only a day after the attempts on Kohinata and Tachibana's parents too.

Then they apparently went to a hot spring. Because what else are you gonna do after beating up terrorists?

-

SONGbird
(Confirmed SONG mook) 
(Guy who knows shit)

Yup, that happened. Can't say much right now, we only just got done and we're about to welcome the Panau team back home and debrief, but things went mostly well. More later.

-

DoubleTheFun
(Inveterate Shipper)

Aw, man. I wanna hear about Hibimiku and KiriShira battle couple shenanigans.

-

Whiteg10

Hey, the man has a job.

Also, portmanteau ship names? Really?

-

SONGbird
(Confirmed SONG mook) 
(Guy who knows shit)

Okay briefings done and… well… there’s a lot I can’t talk about. In fact, I can’t talk about anything really substantial in that briefing. All I can really say is some vague generalities and also add that HOLY FUCK DO THE HORSEMEN HAVE SOME BULLSHIT!

But the big kicker isn’t what I learned, but what I didn’t. Towards the end of the conference, Tachibana asked the “why” question about a certain thing. And then the AC told us mooks to leave. Everyone but the adaptors and the most upper of upper-level guys had to get out, because it was apparently that sensitive. That’s never happened before. All I know is that when they walked out of that room, the kids looked… well, Akatsuki was superglued to Tsukuyomi again, ditto vice-versa, Maria looked worse than I've seen her since Frontier, Kazanari didn't look much better, I can't tell what Yukine was thinking, Kohinata looked more than a little actually scared, and last time Tachibana had that look on her face, she was about to fight a god to save her girl.

And the staff who were present, AC included? They looked like death worn over. Won’t even acknowledge that they even had a conversation. Just a terse “get back to work” towards anyone who even dares to ask. Even the Gremlin, although she’s polite about it.

I don't know what the hell just happened. Not sure I want to, either.

-

THREAD: So, I’m here. AMA (within reason)

Little Red Christmas Bell
(Verified Symphogear Adaptor)
(If You DM Me, I'll Block You)

First things first: Yes, I am Yukine Chris, aka “Symphogear Red”. I’ve been a lurker on this site for a long time, and I figured that since @SONGbird was on here, I might as well give it a try.

That said, even though this is an AMA, I’m going to lay some ground rules.

  1. Don’t ask me anything perverted, especially about me or my friends.
  2. I mean it: If you ask me about my measurements, I will kill you.
  3. Don’t ask me about the current incident that’s ongoing, at least not in this particular thread. A lot of it is still classified, and I’m pretty close to the center. Plus, there’s nothing I can say that SONGbird himself wouldn’t be able to say about the incident.
  4. That said, I will be able to answer questions about past incidents and my experiences. They aren’t for the faint of heart though, so this is your official trigger warning rn. 

Other than that, normal rules still apply.

-

Master9
(Moderator)
(Archive Junkie)

Hokay, two things before everybody else posts.

  1. Yes, this is legit. Both LRCB and SONGbird have verified everything with the admins.
  2. I’ll be watching this thread VERY carefully.

With that said, welcome to the forum Chris Yukine. I hope you enjoy your stay and thank you for everything you’ve done for us.

-

Alola-Aloha-Allaway
(Confirmed Sperg)

HOLY SHIT, really?! No way! Symphogear Red? Chris Yukine?!

Erm… uh… could I possibly get your autograph?

-

Kalenda 
(Confirmed Noise survivor)
(Confirmed Frontier Incident veteran)

Woah, Megadeth for real? On this forum? Uh… well, guess I should apologize to you. When all the news first came out, I kinda didn’t take it well. Plus on reflection, you did save my ass not just at Panau, but also during the Frontier Incident (not to mention, ya know, all the other times you saved ALL our asses). So, thanks a bunch for that. And sorry.

-

Whiteg10

Huh, I recognize your avatar. Plus that username… you’re a UtaZukin fan?

-

Moaron

Wasn’t that show part of the whole disinformation scheme to throw people off the Gear’s identities?

And you lurked here?

Also, quick heads-up for you, Yukine: you might get some inquiries into both you and your friends relationships from DoubleTheFun. He’s not likely to ask anything perverted, but probably stuff that might be a fair bit personal. He’s otherwise a great guy and means well, but… well, he has the Inveterate Shipper tag for a reason. Please don’t hold it against him.

And watch out for Kamen rider 555. How provocative he is tends to vary, but he doesn’t seem to like SONG very much.

-

SONGbird 
(Confirmed SONG mook) 
(Guy who knows shit)

Dammit you were supposed to wait for me!

Ugh. Anyways, Master9 already said it but yes, that's actually Yukine. She was @UtaZukin before, so if you ever spoke to the resident otaku: congrats, you were talking to one of the people whose antics inspired the show. Lot of inaccuracies, of course, because we were specifically trying to avoid giving out details on the kids lives, but yeah. And I'll go ahead and confirm none of the others use this forum, so you get Yukine instead. I'll just be around. Watching.

-

Japenese0Groyper

Well, this was unexpected. Good afternoon, miss Yukine. I hope you're doing well. At any rate, I guess I'll ask some questions that have been at me. Unfortunately I'm afraid most of them are rather personal in nature, so I will understand if you decline to answer.

  1. When the initial leaks hit the internet, there were people accusing you of being responsible for the Noise attacks. SONGbird has indicated that these accusations originated from something called the "Staff of Solomon" and your involvement in the Kadingir Incident. Could you please clarify what exactly occurred?
  2. How exactly did you meet Finé, and why did you work with her? We've been assured you weren't aware of her true intentions, but what did she claim to be doing and what were you trying to do by aiding her?
  3. And to bring up a more light hearted subject: since you apparently have attack names, what do ya got?

-

Little Red Christmas Bell
(Verified Symphogear Adaptor)
(If You DM Me, I'll Block You)

@Alola-Aloha-Allaway
Yes, I’m the real me.

I don’t know about an autograph though. Might violate some kinda security protocol or something if I start mailing sigs out to randos over the internet, you know? No hard feelings.

@Kalenda 
Holy shit, you were at Panau? Uh, listen, I’m flattered by the nickname and all, but you think maybe you could not let it spread?

Anyway, apology accepted. Frontier was just a nightmare for all of us, wasn’t it?

@Moaron
Thanks for the heads up. And yes, I did lurk here under a number of accounts. As for the anime, it’s (very loosely) based off our less high profile missions. It may not make the news as much as when I blow shit up, but the biggest part of my job is high danger rescue missions, and the various episode plots tend to be based off those. As an example, episode 14 was based off that time I had to jump into a big ass fire that started after an avalanche went through some city in Nepal. Fun afternoon, that one.

@SONGbird
You! You aren’t supposed to reveal that I was @UtaZukin! Gah! Now, I’m associated with all of the things I posted on the UtaZukin threads…

@Japenese0Groyper
Whoo boy, you don’t hold back, do you? But don’t worry, I can honestly answer all of your questions.

  1. Back when I worked for Finé (the woman, not the terrorist organization), she used me to activate a relic called the Staff of Solomon. See, before then, Finé did have the ability to summon Noise, but she didn’t have much control over them. But the Staff allows anyone who holds it to summon and control huge numbers of Noise perfectly, and the more Phonic Gain it had, the more it could do. Since I'm a Candidate, I can generate really high Phonic Gain without much effort, so Finé used me to activate it. Unfortunately, it was a Complete Relic, so once I turned it on, literally anyone could use it. Which included Dr. Ver, Finé and assorted other assholes. Good news is, I'm pretty sure it was destroyed in the Frontier Incident.
  2. I met Finé when she kidnapped me from SONG’s custody (though SONG back then was still the Second Division). At the time, though? I thought she was the one who rescued me from that hellhole known as Val Verde. And once she had me in her clutches, she isolated me from pretty much all human contact other than herself and filled my head with all kinds of stupid ideas. Things like “destroying everything and everyone strong enough to fight will end conflict if I'm strong enough". I just went along with it because I was a dumb kid and thought she was the only one I could trust. Then I found out she was just as much of a piece of shit as the people that held me captive in Val Verde. I'm just lucky that I met the dumbass when I did. I honestly don't know what I would've done if she hadn't reached out to me.
  3. Hah, it's a long damn list. I'm one of the more experienced adapters, and Ichaival is versatile as hell: if it's a ranged weapon, I can probably make it. So I have a lot of tricks up my sleeves. Literally, given that's where my Armed Gear pops out of. We don’t consciously choose the special attack names, though. They’re kinda like the songs: they swell up from the subconscious. For a VERY abbreviated list of my usual fighting style: my basic hand bows, which can do a few tricks that would make this even longer. BILLION MAIDEN which is my personal favourite and gives me four fucking miniguns. I love that move so much. HORNET PISTOLS just does what it says on the tin. MEGADETH PARTY is a fuck lotta missiles. And yes, they can home. MEGADETH FUGA is two fuckhuge missiles. Proved really handy taking down fixed emplacements in Panau. MEGADETH QUARTET is four fuckhuge missiles. MEGADETH SYMPHONY is what happens when I engage maxim #37. RED HOT BLAZE is a sniper rifle, but I don't use it much because I think it has worked a grand total of once in my entire life. Or twice, if you count that time I used it as a club, but that wasn't exactly the intended use. The Reflector is a barrier field made by a bunch of tiny rc things, but it only really works on energy attacks. And then there's ROSES OF DEATH, but that's my Swan Song and using it is a bad idea most of the time. I kind of almost died the first time I used it. Admittedly it let me deflect a blast from the Kadingir (aka the motherfucking moon-destroying laser cannon) but if X-Drive hadn't kicked in when it did, I'd be thoroughly dead right now.

And reviewing that list, I just kinda realized why the Marines nicknamed me ‘Megadeth’. Please don’t tell the dumbass about that, by the way. She’d never shut-up about it.

-

Alola-Aloha-Allaway
(Confirmed Sperg)

Aaw, that’s too bad. Still, best of wishes and all my support to you! You girls rock!

-

Guessing/Game

Erm… who do you mean by “the dumbass”? Kazanari? Kohinata?

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DoubleTheFun
(Inveterate Shipper)

OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG

Uh… where to start. Don’t want to be offensive or anything uh…

How shameless are the others? Maybe? Is that too perverted a question? God, this is so exciting and so terrifying, even if it’s just on the internet!

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Kamen rider 555

How do you feel wielding a Symphogear has changed your life?

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Burnout

Tamer question then I was expecting, Kamen.

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Kamen rider 555

However else I might feel about SONG, I figure deliberately antagonizing someone with that many missiles probably isn’t the best idea for my personal health. :p

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Page 2

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Little Red Christmas Bell
(Verified Symphogear Adaptor)
(If You DM Me, I'll Block You)

@Alola-Aloha-Allaway 
Heh, SONGbird wasn't kidding when he said you were an unabashed fangirl. I make no promises, but I'll see what I can do to accommodate you.

@DoubleTheFun
I'd rather not go too much into others’ lives, but I had to tell the dumbass and her girlfriend to get a room three times a day, minimum, before the aforementioned dumbass took a Shem-Ha shaped clue by four to the face. And yes, it really did take her that long to realise two and two meant four. Now? I swear to god I’m going to die from diabetes, and it will be her fault!

I’m not going to talk about my kouhai's glurge. Just thinking about the dumbass and her gf has given me enough cavities for today, thankyouverymuch.

@Guessing/Game
What? No! Why would it be either of those two? It’s Tachibana! It’s always Tachibana! Kinda force of habit that I call her that these days. Not that she hasn't earned it. As mentioned, quite literally took Shem-Ha for her to get a clue and fucking Carol to put that clue into place. No shit, Carol had to practically flat out tell her. And I'm surprised that worked, given… well, rewatch the Frontier fight and listen to Kohinata's lyrics. Yes, really. She somehow missed that. SOMEHOW.

All ribbing aside, I generally mean it affectionately, and she knows it. Tachibana is the reason I'm who I am now. Working for Finé had me on the edge of snapping because I was just so terrified of letting her down, and that dumbass brought me out of it in the middle of a fight, no less! There we were, having a life-and-death showdown, and she started telling me her name, hobbies, lack of ever having had a boyfriend (GEE, I WONDER WHY?!), height, age, and favorite food, and then asked if we could be friends. Not even as any kind of trick or plan, she honestly meant it. That… well, it's what made me start to think I could trust people again.

Come to think of it, she promised me back then she’d share her weight if we became friends but never did. Bet she forgot. That dumbass.

@Kamen rider 555
It’s complicated, but a lot of the good things in my life have come from being able to wield Ichival. Not going to lie.

And yeah, it’s a good idea not to antagonize me. Maybe you could give that advice to certain other people?

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Guessing/Game

Well, if you’re still curious about her weight, it’s in the leaked information. Or at least her weight as of February. They leaked your physicals… 

Wow, only as I type that out do I finally realize how fucking creepy that is.

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Little Red Christmas Bell
(Verified Symphogear Adaptor)
(If You DM Me, I'll Block You)

Okay, first- REALLY? God damn. Fucking Horsemen assholes.

Second, I’m not really that curious.  If anything, I’ll probably wait for the right time to bring it up again, just to see her sputter a little. What’s the use of having friends if you can’t tease em a little?

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Burnout

You know, you mentioned Carol there, and that twigged my memory about how she somehow came back in your Head Researcher’s body during the Shem-Ha incident and… uh… well, that makes me curious about your HR. I don’t think the media has noticed quite yet because they're still so mono-focused on you all (god knows what will happen when they do notice) but how does that whole her being a… homunculus… girl… alchemical… kid work?

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Little Red Christmas Bell
(Verified Symphogear Adaptor)
(If You DM Me, I'll Block You)

@Burnout

Hell if I know. Alchemists are flat-out weirdos. Hell, I'm not even sure Elfnein knows how Elfnein works. I mean, if you want to be pedantic, she isn't even Elfnein, but Elfnein's consciousness in Carol's body. It’s… Complicated.

And no, we don't entirely know how Carol put Elfnein inside her body. Something about copy-pasting memories into a new consciousness, I think. I guess alchemy is more like MS Paint then I originally thought. And then Elfnein used the same trick to resurrect Carol's consciousness from scratch. She says she can’t do it again though: Carol wrecked herself enough fighting us during the Magical Girl Incident.  By the time she was going one v one with Shem-Ha, she was on fumes… but you never know with Alchemists. I’ve seen them not die when they should have enough times to know you can’t ever trust them to stay dead.

Like I said, fucking weirdos

But Elfnein herself? Perfect angel, always willing to do whatever it takes to help. Can’t count the number of times we have to stop her from overworking herself. God bless her.

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SONGbird 
(Confirmed SONG mook)
(Guy who knows shit)

Yeah, our Gremlin is probably the sweetest kid on the planet. I don’t think there's a single mean spirited cell in her body. Terribly smart too. Calls Quantum Physics journals that make my head spin “light reading”. She isn't a particularly strong Alchemist the way Carol was, but she’s still got almost all the know-how that let her go full CAROL MALUS DIENHAM WILL GENOCIDE ALL MIRACLES on Shem-Ha and damn near win. And Alchemy working the way it does, she's still scary good, even if she isn't much of a fighter.

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Whiteg10

So, uh, a few days ago SONGbird mentioned there was a briefing where he and most of the lower-ranks were told to leave and that’s never happened before. Is there anything you can say about that?

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Little Red Christmas Bell
(Verified Symphogear Adaptor)
(If You DM Me, I'll Block You)

No. Refer to OP rule 3.This is the only time I’ll repeat this, and anyone who argues is getting blocked.

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Kamen rider 555

 

So much good things, eh?

[Little Red Christmas Bell Has Blocked This User]

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CONVERSATION: Kamen rider 555
Users: Little Red Christmas Bell, SONGbird

 

Little Red Christmas Bell
(Verified Symphogear Adaptor)
(If You DM Me, I'll Block You)

You’re keeping an eye on this guy, right?

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SONGbird
(Confirmed SONG mook)
(Guy who knows shit)

We’re trying. Problem is we’re basically tangling with that thing in its natural environment. Can’t get a trace because you-know-what is shielding him, and he doesn’t give any hints as to where or who he is. If you want to block him, I recommend it. I only haven’t because I want to keep an eye on the sorta BS he’s peddling. We shouldn’t talk much more about it on an unsecured forum though.

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Little Red Christmas Bell
(Verified Symphogear Adaptor)
(If You DM Me, I'll Block You)

Alright.

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