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Memories of the past and only then

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Drip, Drip, Drip


A constant sound that only irritated Thundercracker's aching processor. He scratched the back of his neck, his digit tapping against the table.


Drip, Drip, Drip


The blue seeker winced as a sudden ringing filled his audios, the multiple voices and loud obnoxious cheers weren't helping at all. He felt like there were a thousand voices and sounds and...He just wanted them to stop...


Drip, Drip, Drip

Yell, Shout, Cheer


Thundercracker pressed his servos to his audios...He just needed them to stop...Just for a little bit....


Drip, Drip, Drip

Yell, Shout, Slap


He needed him to stop. Just please...Stop hurting him.


Drip, Drip, Drip

Scream, Cry, Deep laughter


Just stop please just stop 


Scream, Cry, Muffled voices




Muffled, Muffled, Muffled




Muffled laughter, Muffled cries, Muffled—







He suddenly felt a servo on his shoulder, making him jump, he looked up.

"I-I'm sorry-"


"TC, It's me"


Thundercracker blinked, he looked around.

The mess hall. He was in the mess hall. He wasn't in his room at the castle. He wasn't hiding away in the dark. He was in the mess hall of the Nemesis in the middle of the ocean.

And Starscream was safe.


"TC, are you alright?"


Thundercracker looked back at Skywarp, telling himself that Starscream wasn't actually safe in the Nemesis, and nodded reluctantly.

"Yeah...I'm alright, I'm just... having a...helm...ache..."

His words died down in his throat as he realised everyone in the mess was staring at him, he swallowed down a lump in his throat, he gripped onto the seat to stop his servos from trembling. 


It seems that he wasn't being as discreet as he thought, Skywarp frowned and got up.

"Well look at that! It's time to go! TC, let's go back to the barracks and get some recharge!"


Thundercracker looked up at him, checking his chrono briefly, he blinked.

"But it has only been half the cycle-?"  

He choked on his words as he was suddenly hoisted up and off his seat by the forearm. 


"There we go!"

Skywarp smiled at him then suddenly swiped his thumb over his face.


"What the-Warp!"

Thundercracker rubbed the area Skywarp touched, thinking he had smudged something on his face like paint or oil, only then realising he had tears on his cheeks. He blinked, he...was crying...?


"You had a little bit of energon on there, I hope you don't mind"

Skywarp smiled and held his servo,

"C'mon, Starscream is probably waiting for us" 


Before Thundercracker could protest further, they were in their quarters in a flash of purple light. Skywarp squeezed his servo to comfort him. Thundercracker took a deep breath, it felt like a weight had lifted off his shoulders but he knew it was only temporarily. 


"How about we sit down?"

He asked, already guiding him to their berth. 

Thundercracker slumped down on the edge of the berth with a huff. Skywarp sat beside the blue seeker, servo gently petting his drooping blue wings. 

"Were you thinking about...Him or...?"


Thundercracker inhaled deeply, he closed his optics and listened to his surroundings.




He opened his optics and slowly exhaled, it came out shaky but he continued to breathe slowly.

"I...don't even know anymore..."


Skywarp nodded and they fell into silence.


It was alright...


He reminded himself.


He was alright...


Everything was gonna be alright...


The door opened without warning and light poured into the room, a figure stood at the doorway in an elegant stance. She walked in and opened the lights.


"Hello, you two"

Slipstream purred.

"It's good to be home"



"How long...?"


On the screen, Shockwave glanced to the side. The cyclops didn't exactly have a face but that didn't mean he wasn't expressive in his own way.


"It'll...take more than just a few months for me to arrive, my Lord. I believe it'll take...a year"

Shockwave murmured the last part out as if he was disappointed with himself.


Megatron growled to himself. A year was far too long.

"A year? What do you expect me to do with my second in command during that time period?"


Shockwave stayed silent, He sighed and ran a servo down his exhausted aging face.

"Have you inspected the blueprints of the weapon?"


Shockwave perked up at the change of subject and accepted it with immense gratitude.


"Indeed, I have."

The scientist rummaged through his desk and picked up a datapad.

"From what I can gather from the prints, the weapon itself wipes memories on a scale, zero to a hundred, temporary to permanent."


Megatron hid a shudder. If Starscream had permanently forgotten everything...Megatron wouldn't know what to do. Starscream would be useless to the cause and he'd have to get rid of him.


That thought alone was beyond frightening and Megatron honestly didn't understand why.


"Since we don't exactly know how high the scales were, I've been checking a few of the reports Soundwave sent me himself"


Shockwave's antenna twitched, his optic flickered and his entire frame tensed.

" 'Starscream's been remembering a few moments in his life however he seems to not recall the first time he met Lord Megatron' "


The scientist read out.

" 'He does remember being abused' "


Megatron flinched. Something about the word 'abused' had set him off. Something inside him hated the word, however, he hated himself more than the word itself.


Shockwave sat back in his chair.


He murmured, calculations running though his processor.

"If that is true than we might have a problem"


"Why is that?"

Megatron felt his spark vibrating against its chamber anxiously.


"Remembering certain events in the wrong order could damage the processor, ruin the cogs and change them."

Shockwave skimmed through the datapad to check if he left something out.

"It's interesting, really. It once happened to Soundwave. He's overcome it of course but that's only because he went into others' minds and saw which memory went where. Since it's Starscream, there's hardly any chance he could—Lord Megatron?"

Shockwave blinked, staring at the vacant seat that once had his leader's frame sitting in it.


Megatron strode through the halls, spark vibrating faster and faster. He had to play it cool, he had to make sure it all went well.


He had to make sure that the Starscream he knew stayed alive.


The warlord made it to the door and was about to knock when the door opened automatically, Soundwave standing there with his blank visor and mask.

They stared at each other for the longest time before Soundwave stepped out of the way, having read what happened and why he was there, Megatron hesitated before making up his processor and going in.


This was for the best.



Starscream stared at the dark monitor screen. Optics stinging.

How long was he supposed to be here? How long did he actually stay here?

The seeker's wings drooped, he placed his helm in his servo.


Why did he feel so drained? He never felt so tired since...


Starscream paused.


Since...? Since when?


In the middle of trying to search through his memories, he heard a loud CLANG. Starscream blinked and looked around. He got up and looked over the monitor just in time to see a paint bucket roll toward the monitor, the bucket stopped once it collided with the edge.


The Seeker got off his seat and walked around the monitor to follow a trail of yellow paint. He stepped out through the doorway and looked around. Nothing. The trail just stopped there.


Before he could turn and leave, another CLANG rang through his audios causing him to jump. He turned to where he heard it and saw two minicons at the far side corner next to a small storage room. 


One was black and red, the other was purple and blue.


"I told you we should've gone with the other one"

One of them groaned, rubbing his servo against his helm from where it collided with the ground.


"Do you really want to waste our time trying to pry off a lid?"


"No, but at least it wouldn't have spilled everywhere, you d—!"


"What're you two doing?"

Starscream interrupted, stepping in front of them.


The two jumped and stood straight.

"Oh hey, Screams! We were just gonna paint the walls!"


The jet blinked.

" 'Paint the walls'? At this time?" 


They both nodded quickly.


"...With a single bucket?"


They both nodded again but a little slower.


"...with yellow paint?"


This time they stared at him in silence. The two glanced at each other then back at Starscream.

"You gonna tell the boss?"

One of them asked quietly, kicking their leg a bit in an awkward fashion.






Starscream flinched at the mention of his name. He was having such a bland day that he almost forgot about Megatron. He seemed so nice to him at first but from what he saw in his memories...Was he just trying to manipulate him? Was he trying to lower his guard down? Hurt him again? But why him? Why did it always have to be him? 


...He missed Jetfire so bad...




The Seeker blinked back into reality, his optics were blurry with tears, he blinked again tomake sure they were gone


His voice was strained and broken, Starscream shook his head and repeated himself more firmly after clearing his throat.

"No, I won't. You two can go, I'll clean this up."


The two minicons glanced at each other again but this time they sent a message through their bond. They looked back at Starscream and started running off.


Starscream sighed, looking at the yellow paint. He frowned a bit. 


Why yellow? 


That would be a horrible colour for the base.


He shook his head and went to get a cleaning rag. 


Does anybody here have taste?