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Battle of the Dads

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The battle was ferocious. Blades were clashing, people were screaming, the smell of blood and mud and smoke had invaded the field. No side was taking the advantage. And suddenly...

- How dare you ?!!! Tajima Uchiha roared, Sharingan swirling, ready to kill.

Around them the fighting had stopped, warriors waiting with batted breath for the issue of the fight. And then...

- My kids are better than yours !!! the Uchiha Clan Head screeched.

This approximately at this moment that evrybody on the battlefield froze.

Except Tobirama.

Little Tobirama, twelve and already tired by life and the idiot he was forced to live with, knew what always happened when you said these exact words to Butsuma Senju. (Don't remember what happen at the Hatake compound. Just don't). So little Tobirama did the only thing he could do in this situation.

He facepalmed.


- No, Butsuma snarled, voice low and threatening, MY kids are better than YOURS !
- Ah ! Madara was walking by one !
- Hashirama did as much ! And he has the Mokuton !
- Izuna is the most gifted genjutsu user in generations !
- Tobirama is a genius in his own right !

It went on and on, each father boasting about their kids' accomplishments, being increasingly more ridiculous. And finally... Yep, here were the baby photos. Where they were hiding them, nobody would ever know... But Tobirama knew it was time to take measures.


Izuna was cringing with each photo his father was wiping out (yep that was the one were he was disguised as a rabbit, he thought he had gotten rid of every last copy), his embarrassement skyrocketting. Why couldn't they just try to gut each other like normal people, rather than having a dad competition in the middle of the battlefield ? The other warriors, Senju and Uchiha alike, were watching with amusement clear on their faces.

Izuna turned to his rival to have a little support, and saw that the young albino was busy digging the ground with a shovel.

- What are you doing ? he asked.
- Digging.
- Yeah, I can see. Why ?
- I'm digging a grave. For myself. I don't want to deal with their antics anymore.
- That seems to be a little extreme...

He glance to Tajima, who had wiped even more baby photo and had also started crying, apparently overwhelmed by his children awesomeness. Butsuma was in the same state of dad exaltation. The other warriors were laughing their asses off and some appeared to make bets. Hashirama and Madara were nowhere in sight. Izuna cringed.

- Do you happen to have a spare shovel ? he asked.

Tobirama wiped one out of nowhere. Grateful, Izuna took it ans started digging.


Meanwhile, in the forest nearby.

- Do you think they've remarked we're not here anymore ? Madara asked, naked, sweaty, lying on Hashirama's side.

Hashirama frowned and shrugged.

- Nah...