After Princess Margarette and her father were escorted out of the throne room and Hiccup had accompanied Astrid back to her suite he returned to the throne room to hear Gobber scolding Stoick. It wasn’t often Gobber did that but it was such a funny sight.
“.... and tha think yer ignoring the delegates….”
“Gobber….. Gobber I get it,” Stoick sighed. “Valka’s going to murder me.”
“You bet yer arse she is. Why, if it wasn’t for Lady Stormheart calming her down she may have just barged in here with her staff swinging and smacked those annoying Royals that took yer time.” Gobber continued. “You saw her eye twitch when the news came they were here at the Palace with no prior notice.”
Hiccup saw his father gulp and nod as Gobber continued “Ye left us to do the fleet positioning ourselves and then more news came in that the delegates from Dunbroch and Arendelle arrived as well. Ye were supposed to meet them together.”
“I know Gobber. Thor help me,” Stoick groaned as he leaned back against the throne. “I’m going to have to grovel aren’t I?”
Neither of the men realized that Hiccup was in the room. It was empty save for the three of them as Stoick had dismissed the guards.
“Is there something I need to know dad?” Hiccup asked with a raised brow. “Fleet positioning? And aunt Nikora is still here?” Hiccup frowned. The Marchioness was a bit of a loner at times. She really only had a select few friends which included his mother and after the social gatherings had ended she usually left within a few hours. For her to have stayed the night only meant one thing to Hiccup. “What scheme is mom plotting this time?”
“Mom’s plot was brilliant if you ask me, though we didn’t take into account Maragette and her father actually showing up. That was just a fluke that sent us into enacting it earlier.” Hiccup told his uncle who looked constipated. Being bested so thoroughly wasn’t really a good look for him. “Dad went to procure flowers to apologize for his…… blunder,” Hiccup smirked as his father sputtered “While Gobber, Astrid and I met with mom in her private rooms. To my surprise Heather, Mala, Sierra and Alvin were already there.”
“Mala? What does she have to do with this? I didn’t see her!” Spitelout uttered perplexed.
“You didn’t? Really? I mean I know her disguise was good, but really?” Hiccup looked perplexed. “You just talked to her. She was the maid in the room.”
“What?!” Spitelout looked flummoxed. “No she wasn’t!”
“She was,” Astrid confirmed.
“MURDER! THERE’S BEEN MURDER!!! THE KING, THE QUEEN, AND THE ADVISOR HAVE BEEN MURDERED! HELP! GUARDS HELP!!!”
“Ah, Alvin started already,” Hiccup said before looking towards Astrid. “You can still be safe if Marchioness Stormheart’s fleet is unable to keep the armada at bay.”
“Hiccup, I already told you I’m staying.” Astrid punched him lightly on the arm as they made their way over to Alvin’s very dramatic shouting. “You’re stuck with me and right now we have some acting to do. Let’s put on a good show.” She then actually winked at Hiccup causing the auburn-haired prince to blush. When they got to the scene the blush, which hadn’t dissipated, made Hiccup look like he was out of breath from running.
Meanwhile, before Alvin started his part Mala was putting the finishing touches on her disguise with the help of Heather.
“I can’t believe you look so different,” Heather was impressed. Gone was the assertive ‘chef’ and in her place stood a young bedraggled maid sporting a multitude of freckles. The wig Mala was using had a disheveled look to it with locks of brown hair sticking up at odd angles. To add to the realism she also rumpled up the maid uniform, making it look like she had been manhandled.
“Now here’s to hoping this plan works,” Mala stated.
“Hey, don’t worry.” Heather said. “Both Hiccup and Astrid are good actors. They’ve ran through the plan several times. Even the confrontation with the Marchioness is scripted perfectly.” Here Heather laughed “Remember, Alvin even asked the Queen why she never became a stage director,”
Mala nodded as Alvin’s shouts, and the echos thereof, reached past the room they were in. “Looks like it’s showtime,” Both women smirked and Heather departed.
“Though I didn’t think you guys would be that relaxed about it,” Hiccup said as he looked towards his father.
“Relaxed? What do you mean?” Astrid was curious and frowned a bit.
“Ah, right. So remember when I needed to go into the room,”
Hiccup entered the room his parents and Gobber supposedly perished in and found them sipping wine while looking at a map of the Isle of Berk.
“Well isn’t this cozy,” Hiccup crossed his arms and muttered “Here we are having to act like you guys are dead while instead you are enjoying ‘poisoned’ wine.”
“Hiccup darling, it’s good wine. I’m not letting it go to waste,” His mother stated and then pointed at the map while taking another sip. “This will be where Gobber and I will be heading Stoick. Lars has to make it to The Long beach to get within cannon striking distance of the city and palace. We will intercept him from here.” She pointed towards Dead head Headland where Hiccup knew Marchioness Stormheart’s fleet was doing ‘surprise training exercises’. That was the excuse the Marchioness had used to mobilize the Berkian navy under her command a few days prior. By Hiccup’s estimation their fleet numbered at least three times the size of Lars’ armada. Stoick had originally protested deploying such a large number of ships but his wife stated that she would rather go big and make a statement. Lars’ crushing defeat would also serve a dual purpose, according to Valka, as to let the other kingdoms in the region know that Berk still commanded the mightiest navy even in peaceful times. There was some unrest in the west and this would squash anyone else’s dreams of attacking the kingdom.
The secret passage in the room, that had been designed to smuggle high-ranking members of society to safety, opened to reveal Sierra holding a lantern. “Your Maje-... I mean aunt Valka, mister Gobber, Lady Jorgenson and her husband are waiting in a nondescript carriage at the end of this passage to take you to the rendezvous point where you’ll meet with your dragons.”
“Well we’re off!” Valka announced, quickly planting a kiss on her husband’s cheek before turning to her son. “You and Nikora have fun playing it up. Your mother is going to destroy some ships!”
“She always gets to do the fun stuff,” Stoick grumbled and pouted as Hiccup set a grim expression on his face before walking back out of the room, leaving his father and Sierra behind.
Hiccup exited the room and promptly closed the door before uttering “It’s them,” He tried to keep his tone even. Looking at his fiance he just knew she knew he was trying to hold in his laughter at this whole elaborate ploy because Spitelout was eating it up, none the wiser.
Vala: "HARRY DO YOU WANT ROASTED PORG?" (Has the Porg tied to a spit)
Harry: (while reading a very angst-filled book) "Sure!" (Stops reading and blinks) "Did you say Pork or Porg?!"
Vala: "Porg of course!"
Harry: "MAH PORG!" (Scrambles to rescue Porg)