Actions

Work Header

School Blues

Chapter Text

[Bang Chan has added Kim Hongjoong, Song Yuqi, Yeo Hwanwoong, Jung Jinsoul, Choi Vernon, and Song Mingi to the chat]

[Bang C han has changed the name of the chat to welcoming committee]

[Bang Chan has changed Bang Chan to Dad]

[Bang Chan has changed Kim Hongjoong to Mom]

Song Mingi: ew we get it you want into Joongie hyung's pants but can you not make it so obvious right in front of my salad 

Dad: I have no idea what you are talking about 

Song Yuqi: like youd eat a salad Minkus

Song Mingi: when are you going to stop calling me that 

Song Yuqi: when you stop being a disgrace to the Song name 

Song Yuqi: so likely never 

[Dad has changed Song Mingi to Mango]

Mango: ...

Mango: I suddenly prefer Minkus 

[Dad has changed Song Yuqi to Queen]

Mango: WHY DOES SHE GET A GOOD NAME 

Mango: SHE IS THE DEVIL'S SPAWN

Dad: she is also dating Minghao

Dad: and he scares me

Queen: 😁

[Dad has changed Jung Jinsoul to Snow Queen]

Mango: I call favoritism 

Mango: this is why Hongjoong hyung is my favorite 

Mango: he would never 

Queen: whatever helps you sleep at night Janet

[Dad has changed Yeo Hwanwoong to Baby]

Queen: My son

Queen: my child that I raised on my back 

Queen: the fruit of my loins 

Baby: .... 

Baby: please never call me the fruit of your loins again 

Baby: I'm disturbed 

Queen: I'll call you what I want bby

Baby: I want to be called tall

Snow Queen: You really said that when a whole ass Mingi exists 

Queen: I can only call you things that are true bby

Queen: I cant lie and tell you you're tall cause bby you're smol 

Queen: so smol and cute I wanna put you in my pocket 

Baby: please no

Baby: I'm still traumatized from the last time you tried 

Dad: you what-

Queen: nothing to worry your aussie little head over 

Queen: or big head in your case

Queen: ya boi got a head the size of a watermelon 

Queen: while Woongie bby is the size of a watermelon 

Choi Vernon: why am I being woken up by notifications 

Queen: its 2pm why are you just now waking up 

Choi Vernon : bold of you to assume that I slept at all last night 

Dad: Vernon-

Choi Vernon: I mean I slept loonngg last night 

Choi Vernon: Super good sleep 

[Dad has changed Choi Vernon to Han Solo]

Han Solo: Who's Han Solo

Han Solo: Oh wait is he a rapper cause I can get down with that 

Dad: I'm disowning you 

Baby: can I be disowned too?

Queen: no

Baby: it was worth the try 

Queen: Crispy can you please explain why we are here? 

Dad: right 

Dad: all of you signed up to help the welcoming committee so you'll be with me and helping the incoming freshmen become acquainted to our beautiful school 

Baby: you mean our shitty roach infested dump of a school 

Baby: can I just ruin their dreams from the start and tell them they'll hate it here 

Dad: do not traumatize the poor freshmen Woong

Mango: be careful Woongie 

Mango: they might mistake you for one of them 

Mango: they might even think you're a middle schooler on a school tour 

Baby: fight me asswipe

Mango: I would but you couldnt reach higher than my chest shrimpy

Baby: watch me hoe 

Chapter Text

[Bang Chan has added Lee Felix, Han Jisung, Hwang Yeji, Choi Soobin, Yang Jeongin, Kim Seungmin, and Jeon Heejin to the chat]

[Bang Chan has named the chat Freshmeat]

[Bang Chan has changed their name to Chan]

Chan: so all of you were added to my group after orientation so I will help you all get accustomed to the university! My name is Bang Chan but you can just call me Chan and I'm a senior triple major in music production, business, and anthropology. 

Choi Soobin: triple major-

Lee Felix: how do you have time to sleep mate 

Chan: sleep? Idk her 

Chan: anyway i thought that I should introduce you to some people to help you around the university since only having me would be a mess

Chan: will that be cool with everyone? 

Jeon Heejin: that's fine with me

Han Jisung: same here 

Chan: great 

[Chan has added Song Yuqi, Song Mingi, and Yeo Hwanwoong to the chat]

Chan: I'll start small and add more people when needed for now these three should be enough 

Yeo Hwanwoong: what the fuck chanstopher Robin

Yeo Hwanwoong: how many chats are you going to add me to-

Chan: language!

Chan: there are children here

Song Mingi: I bet they're still taller than Woongie

Yeo Hwanwoong: do I need to deck you again virus?

Song Mingi: you got lucky I was standing next to a bench otherwise you wouldnt have been able to reach garden knome

Yeo Hwanwoong: send me your location right fucking now and let's test that 

Han Jisung: WAIT ARE YOU THE KID THAT GOT PUNCHED ON THE QUAD 

Han Jisung: IS YOUR FACE OKAY

Lee Felix: For a tiny person that punch looked like it hurt

Yeo Hwanwoong: I dont know who you are 

Yeo Hwanwoong: or what you look like 

Yeo Hwanwoong: but I will find you and kill you 

Song Mingi: aww look at the wittle baby trying to be scary 

Yeo Hwanwoong: I will bite your dick off fucker 

Jeon Heejin: why is his dick in your mouth 

Lee Felix: y'all fucking or nah 

Yeo Hwanwoong: that's not the point-

Song Yuqi: I did not see a single word of denial 

Song Yuqi: DAD

Song Yuqi: DAD

Song Yuqi: FATHER 

Song Yuqi: DADDY 

Song Mingi: isn't that word reserved for Minghao 

Song Yuqi: bold of you to assume Minghao is a dom 

Song Mingi: I-

Song Yuqi: 😗

Chan: I LEAVE FOR FIVE MINUTES AND THIS IS WHAT I COME BACK TO 

Chan: STOP SCARING THE POOR CHILDREN YOU RATS

Song Mingi: I'm telling Hongjoong you called us rats 

Chan: do it and I'll tell him how you made the freshie cry

Song Mingi: I stand by the fact Hongjoong is my favorite 

Chan: good thing you're not in my top 10 

Song Mingi: YOU DONT EVEN HAVE TEN KIDS HOW AM I NOT IN THE TOP 10

Chan: anyway I think we should introduce ourselves since we will be acquainted with each other over the next couple of months. I've already gone so whoever wants to go next can go 

Song Mingi: oh so you're just going to ignore me like a lil bitch huh? 

Chan: oh Mingi you volunteer? Wonderful introduce yourself before I send those lovely pictures of you st that party to Hongjoong :) 

Han Jisung: that smiley looks intimidating 

Song Mingi: Marty I'm scared-

Song Mingi: umm I'm Mingi

Song Mingi: I'm a sophomore and I major in dance 

Chan: send a picture so the good people know what you look like 

Song Mingi: you didnt-

Chan: I was their guard, they know what I look like we were together for over an hour 

Chan: send it or I'll send one to Joongie 😘

Song Mingi: I hate this fucking family 

Song Mingi:  Selfie

Han Jisung: holy fuck you're hot 

Jeon Heejin: I'd turn straight for you 

Song Mingi: oh ho ho would you look at this 😏

Yeo Hwanwoong: Mingi and his harem strike again 

Song Mingi: Harem- 

Chan: Yuqi please go- 

Song Yuqi: fine

Song Yuqi: sup fuckers 

Song Yuqi: the name's Yuqi I'm a sophomore film major and dance minor 

Song Yuqi: I'll bless you with my beautiful face 

Song Yuqi: but dont feel too blessed this beauty is taken 

Yeo Hwanwoong:  by the school thug 

Song Yuqi: stop slandering HaoHao's name you whore 

Yeo Hwanwoong: Once upon a time not long ago 

Lee Felix: I WAS A HOE 

Yeo Hwanwoong: AND IM ADMITTING IT 

Chan: Yeo Hwanwoong-

Chan: I regret this all 

Chan: I should have chosen the good children 

Yeo Hwanwoong: sucks for you 

Han Jisung: Is that what you say to Mingi

Yeo Hwanwoong: *chokes*

Jeon Heejin: does that mean that Mingi is big or you got a small mouth 

Song Yuqi: Woongie is babie so Mingi is just small 

Song Mingi: can we not talk about the size of my dick- 

Choi Soobin: oh no do you have a small dick? Are you embarrassed 

Chan: yuqi please for the love of god send a picture 

Song Yuqi: if you want a picture of Mingi's dick you'll have to ask Hwanwoong 

Yeo Hwanwoong: .....

Song Mingi: .....

Chan: OH MY FUCKING GOD

Chan: this is what we are not about to do

Chan: Yuqi send your fucking picture before I bust a vein 

Song Yuqi: FiNe

Song Yuqi: be blessed hoes Selfie

Jeon Heejin: omg you're so pretty 

Jeon Heejin: my heart just busted the biggest nut 

Song Mingi: dont let her face fool you, shes the devil 

Song Yuqi: try me bitch 

Chan: Hwanwoong go

Yeo Hwanwoong: I'm Hwanwoong, I'm a junior and I'm a dance major 

Yeo Hwanwoong: Woong

Han Jisung: I'm busting the fastest fucking uwu right now 

Lee Felix: that should be illegal 

Jeon Heejin: you look so soft I just wanna cuddle and squeeze and swkwjnw

Choi Soobin: so soft looking-

Chan: since Woongie broke the kids I think that's enough for right now the kids can introduce themselves later-

 

Chapter Text

[Freshmeat]

Han Jisung: okay but real talk all day all I could think about was how smol Hwanwoong must be 

Han Jisung: like did you see those baby hands ejenhdbd

Han Jisung: I just want to hold them 

Chan: so we are still talking about Hwanwoong i see 

Song Yuqi: dont be jealous crispy baby 

Song Yuqi: these freshmen are too young for your dinosaur ass

Song Mingi: Yuqi we both know Chan doesnt want any of them 

Chan: thank you Mingi

Song Mingi: hes whipped as fuck for Hongjoongie hyung

Chan: I take it back 

Chan: please excuse me while I google how to return children you no longer want 

Song Mingi: jokes on you, you're stuck with me bitch 

Chan: 😩

Chan: anyway

Chan: I guess now I a good time for the freshies to introduce themselves 

Han Jisung: I can go first ig

Han Jisung: I'm Jisung, im a squirrel, and I double major in photography and music production 

Han Jisung: Selfie

Song Yuqi: I'm adopting you 

Chan: everyone is my kid-

Song Yuqi: well now hes your grandkid dinosaur deal with it 

Chan: why do I put up with you-

Song Yuqi: because my boyfi scares you 

Chan: Minghao scares EVERYONE

Song Yuqi: not me

Song Mingi: because you're fucking him 

Song Yuqi: and you're fucking Woongie

Song Yuqi: your point???

Song Mingi: I'm not fucking anyone 

Song Yuqi: exhibit a [inserts screenshot]

Song Yuqi: exhibit b [inserts screenshot]

Song Yuqi: exhibit c: you kicked Wooyoung out of your room so you could 'hang' with woongie 

Song Yuqi: which we all know is code for you wanted to fuck 

Yeo Hwanwoong: can we not do this here-

Song Yuqi: if you wouldnt have been hiding the truth from your best fucking friends it wouldnt have been happening in the first place 

Yeo Hwanwoong: Yuqi-

Chan: why dont we let the kids finish introducing themselves- 

Choi Soobin: I'll go I guess-

Choi Soobin: I'm Soobin and I'm a vocal performance major 

Choi Soobin:  Selfie

Lee Felix: I just choked on my coffee what the fuck 

Choi Soobin: I'm sorry-

Lee Felix: don't BE 

Lee Felix: I was just shocked 

Lee Felix: in a good way 

Lee Felix: cause you're hella pretty 

Choi Soobin: oh-

Song Yuqi: you're doing great kid 👏

Lee Felix: I'm gonna jump off a cliff now ✌

Song Yuqi: At least let lover boy see your face first 

Lee Felix: I'm Felix, I'm a dancer major and im about to fucking DiE

Lee Felix:  Selfie

Choi Soobin: oh wow-

 

Chapter Text

[Freshmeat]

Hwang Yeji: I try and be a good student and pay attention in class and what do I get? I come back to my phone blowing tf up

Hwang Yeji: what the hell

Chan: ah nice you're here 

Chan: why don't you introduce yourself to the others

Hwang Yeji: uh sure ig

Hwang Yeji: I'm Yeji and my major is undeclared 

Chan: add a picture!!

Hwang Yeji: Selfie

Kim Seungmin: I know you 

Hwang Yeji: you do??

Kim Seungmin: you hang out with Hyunjin right??

Hwang Yeji: you mean my brother-

Kim Seungmin: YES

KIM Seungmin: Hyunjin and I worked together on a project last year and I saw you around sometimes 

Hwang Yeji: that's nice I guess-

Kim Seungmin: yeah- 

Kim Seungmin: I'll um go next- 

Kim Seungmin: I'm Seungmin, im a photography and music performance double major 

Kim Seungmin:  Selfie

Hwang Yeji: ah yes I remember you now 

Hwang Yeji: church boy 

Kim Seungmin: is that really my legacy-

Hwang Yeji: sure is 

Chan: Jeongin? Heejin? Are either of you on to introduce yourselves? 

[Lee Felix started a chat with Choi Soobin]

Lee Felix: so I know we just met but do you want to hang out sometime??

Choi Soobin: sure but why me-

Lee Felix: because I'd really like to get to know you 

Lee Felix: we dont have to if you dont want to of course!

Lee Felix: I dont want to pressure you into anything you dont want to do 

Choi Soobin: I'd like to hang out with you 

Lee Felix: awesome!

Lee Felix: I'll text you later with the details! 

Chapter Text

[Lee Felix and Choi Soobin]

Lee Felix: Hey!

Lee Felix: you got any plans for Friday night??

Choi Soobin: I have class until 3 but after that I should be free 

Lee Felix: perfect 

Lee Felix: I'll pick you up outside your dorm 

Lee Felix: does around 5 work for you??

Choi Soobin: that works for me!

Choi Soobin: where are we going?

Lee Felix: that's a secret bub 

Choi Soobin: but how will I know what to wear-

Lee Felix: wear whatever you want

Lee Felix: I'm sure you'll look beautiful in anything 

Choi Soobin: msjsdbbdbdndn

Lee Felix: you're cute 

Choi Soobin: oh my god please stop I'm so red right now smdmd

Lee Felix: even cuter 

Lee Felix: I can't wait to see you on Friday 

[Choi Soobin and Jung Jungkook]

Choi Soobin: HYUNG

Choi Soobin: A CUTE BOY IS FLIRTING WITH ME WHAT DO I DO 

Jung Jungkook: you flirt back

Jung Jungkook: look at baby Soobinnie already flirting on his first week 

Jung Jungkook: they grow up so fast

Choi Soobin: I cant flirt with him-

Choi Soobin: he's soooooo out of my league hyung 

Choi Soobin: he asked me to hang out 

Choi Soobin: BECAUSE HE WANTS TO GET TO KNOW ME

Choi Soobin: and he was SO nice about it 

Choi Soobin: WHAT DOES THAT MEAN HYUNG

Jung Jungkook: i think it means he likes you and wants to get to know you 

Choi Soobin: I dont believe that 

Choi Soobin: cute boys dont like me 

Choi Soobin: it just doesnt happen 

Jung Jungkook: or 

Jung Jungkook: it just never happened before because your brothers always scared anyone off that even looked at you 

Choi Soobin: ...excuse me?!?!? 

Choi Soobin: they did WHAT

Jung Jungkook: and this is my cue to leave because I totally was not supposed to tell you that- 

Choi Soobin: HYUNG

Choi Soobin: JUNGKOOK HYUNG

Choi Soobin: I HATE YOU 😤

[Freshmeat]

Song Yuqi: Channie daddy I think you need to give your new kids "the talk"

Han Jisung: pleasestoptalking

Chan: ...

Chan: what happened-

Song Yuqi: so

Song Yuqi: I was walking with Jisung to the lunchroom when he says something 

Han Jisung: please no-

Song Yuqi: so I reply "I'll choke you"

Han Jisung: I beg you dont do this-

Song Yuqi: and you want to know what your child says??

Song Yuqi: "choke me mommy" 

Song Mingi: OMG THATA GOLD

Song Yuqi: mind you there are people around us 

Song Yuqi: and he just sits there for a few seconds before cursing loudly and running off 

Song Yuqi: Woongie was on the floor dying 

Han Jisung: I FORGOT YOURE NOT THR PEOPLE I USUALLY TALK TO LET MR LIVE

Song Yuqi: Mr. Who? Is he cute

Song Mingi: is he single? 

Yeo Hwanwoong: is he gay? 

Chan: ...

Chan: I hate this fucking family I'm sending you all to Hongjoong 

Chan: you're giving me gray hair 

Lee Felix: maybe you're just old, old man 

Lee Felix: ya dinosaur 

Lee Felix: ya fossil

Lee Felix: ya prehistoric landmass 

Lee Felix: ya b.c. Headass 

Chan: I'm quitting 

Chan: you're all orphans now 

Chapter Text

[Lee Felix started a chat with Bang Chan]

Lee Felix: yo Chaniel

Lee Felix: what's some semi romantic spots around campus 

Bang Chan: only semi romantic?

Lee Felix: yes 

Lee Felix: I'm trying to woo a boy 

Lee Felix: but I dont want to scare him away 

Bang Chan: well if you want a date feel but not too datey then I suggest taking him to the quad

Bang Chan: a lot of people go there for dates 

Bang Chan: make a picnic and take him there

Bang Chan: and there will probably be enough people there so he wont feel uncomfortable with just you 

Bang Chan: but there will be enough space so itll still be privateish

Lee Felix: thanks Chanice you're the real mvp mvp 

Lee Felix: ya boi about to get a cute boi

[Freshmeat]

Choi Soobin: Chan hyung 

Choi Soobin: how do we switch classes-

Chan: if you wanna meet me on campus later I can show you? 

Chan: it's kind of confusing 

Chan: is there a specific reason you want to switch classes already?? 

Chan: Not that there is anything wrong with switching classes, I just want to make sure everything is okay 

Choi Soobin: everything is fine I just dont like the class as much as I thought I would 

Hwang Yeji: is it that history class?

Choi Soobin: yeah-

Hwang Yeji: I'm about to drop that shit too 

Hwang Yeji: I'm not spending my whole semester with that dick of a teacher 

Chan: what history class? And what happened??

Song Yuqi: Is it Mr. Lee? I heard he got rehired after last time 

Chan: god I hated Mr. Lee ever since he made Hongjoong cry 

Hwang Yeji: yeah his name is Mr. Lee

Hwang Yeji: I think his first name was like Junjin or something like that 

Song Yuqi: FUCK

Song Yuqi: HIM

Song Mingi: why is he still allowed to teach?

Chan: what did he do @yeji @soobin

Hwang Yeji: he was making homophobic comments the ENTIRE class 

Hwang Yeji: I was literally two seconds away from standing up and punching him in the face 

Hwang Yeji: he also said some things directly to students that was fucked up 

Song Yuqi: and I thought I couldn't hate him anymore man

Song Yuqi: I propose a code perrywinkle 

Song Mingi: what does code periwinkle stand for again-

Song Yuqi: DISGRACE

Song Yuqi: it stands for piss off the assholes 

Song Mingi: you could have just said that 

Song Yuqi: you could have just fucked off

Song Yuqi: I propose that we round up all the gays and storm his classroom 

Song Mingi: and?

Song Yuqi: we scare him with the gay 

Chan: what does that mean-

Song Yuqi: 😗😗😗

Hwang Yeji: how do you expect that to work?

Song Yuqi: oh trust me it will

Song Yuqi: now everyone go and call all your gays 

Song Yuqi: WE RIDE AT

Song Yuqi: what time is your class...

Hwang Yeji: 12

Song Yuqi: WE RIDE AT 12 

Chapter Text

[Yeo Hwanwoong has started a chat with Kim Youngjo]

Yeo Hwanwoong: I'm tired of playing games 

Yeo Hwanwoong: do you want to be with me or not

Yeo Hwanwoong: stop sending me mixed signals 

Kim Youngjo: oh so I'm the one sending mixed signals now?

Kim Youngjo: you go from wanting to get back together to fucking with someone else 

Kim Youngjo: make up your fucking mind with what you want 

Yeo Hwanwoong: You have no right 

Yeo Hwanwoong: YOU are the one who broke up with me after three fucking years saying you didnt feel the same way about me anymore 

Yeo Hwanwoong: you broke my fucking heart you asshole 

Yeo Hwanwoong: and now you want to try and come back after I find someone else?

Yeo Hwanwoong: you dont get to love me when its convenient to you 

Yeo Hwanwoong: so make up your mind 

Yeo Hwanwoong: either you want me or you dont 

Yeo Hwanwoong: dont try to talk to me again until you figure out 

[Yeo Hwanwoong has left the chat]

 

[Welcoming committee]

Mom: I cannot believe I hang out with such idiots

Mom: who thought that that was a good idea

Mango: I believe it was Yuqi

Queen: fucking traitor 

Mom: Yuqi I thought I raised you better than this

Mom: if you were smart enough to stage a sit in or sorts you could have at least been smart enough to MAKE SURE IT WAS THE RIGHT ROOM

Mom: you traumatized a class full of CHILDREN who had to see a bunch of people making out 

Queen: I blame Mingus 

Queen: he got the room number switched up 

Mango: you were the leader 

Mango: therefore it's your fault 

Snow Queen: my dudes shut the fuck up

Snow Queen: I have 5 minutes to nap and my phone keeps going off 

Mom: five minutes isnt even worth it

Snow Queen: every second of sleep is worth it

Snow Queen: but that's something you and Chan wouldn't know about 

Mom: listen you little shit-

Mango: ooh mom is cussing 

Mango: has the world ended?

Mom: I'm disowning you

Baby: Yuqi can you come to my dorm after you get out of class?

Queen: yeah 

Queen: is everything okay?

Baby: no 

Baby: but I don't want to talk about it here

Mom: do you want just Yuqi or do you want the rest of us to come as well?

Baby: everyone but Mingi-

Mango: what the fuck 

Queen: what did you do? 

Queen: if you hurt him I swear to god 

Baby: he didnt do anything 

Baby: I just...

Baby: him being here will make things worse 

Baby: I'm sorry Mingi

Mango: dont be sorry

Mango: Its whatever 

[Mango has left the chat]

Baby: ...

Baby: i fucked up didnt I-

Mom: no baby I'll talk to him later dont worry about it

Queen: Joongie oppa pick me up 

Queen: i have too much shit to carry 

Mom: shouldnt you be in class

Queen: My child needs me more than I need to learn that the sun revolves around the earth 

Mom: ...

Mom: I think you need class more than you think-

Chapter Text

Soobin stands in front of his mirror and stares at himself for the 5th time in the past hour. The minute he got out of class he rushed back towards his dorm to get ready for his date with Felix. He was nervous to say the least. He had never been on a date before as no one in his school ever seemed interested in him. 

Soobin sighs as he looks at his appearance in the mirror before getting second thoughts about his outfit. He heads towards his closet to try and find something else to wear before the sound of his roommate talking stops him. 

"Dude I swear if you're going to change your clothes again I'm about to smack you" Donghyuck says as he looks at Soobin. 

Donghyuck was Soobin's roommate and was a year older than him. While at first he came off as extremely intimidating, he warmed up to Soobin quickly. 

"But hyung-" Soobin says as he turns to look at Donghyuck "I dont want him to think that I look bad. I really want him to like me" he says frowning as he looks down at his outfit once more. 

Donghyuck sighs dramatically before he gets up from his bed and walks over towards Soobin "listen Soobinnie, you've looked absolutely perfect in every single outfit that you've picked out and if this mystery dude that you're 'hanging out' with doesnt see it then he is an idiot." Donghyuck says before he rummages through Soobin's closet looking for something. "Found it!" Donghyuck shouts before he comes out and walks over to Soobin placing the beret that he got out onto his head "there now you look super cute!" He says smiling before he forces Soobin to turn towards the mirror "you look perfect now stop worrying okay?" 

Soobin looks at himself in the mirror for a few moments before he nods at Donghyuck "what if I'm overdressed? Or underdressed?" He asks looking at Donghyuck worriedly 

"Did he tell you where you are going?" Donghyuck asks as he looks at Soobin. 

Soobin shakes his head "he just said that it would be a surprise" 

"Then obviously you dont need to worry about a dress code. Only an asshole wouldnt tell you how you should dress" Donghyuck replies "stop worrying yourself so much, the date hasnt even started yet" 

"But theres so much that could go wrong." Soobin replies as he looks at Donghyuck "he might not even like me like that. I may be making a big deal out of all of this only to embarrass myself when he gets here because he didnt actually want a date"

"Soobin if he didnt want a date he wouldnt have asked to hang out with you. Alone. He likes you obviously and he likes you for you so stop freaking out. You're freaking perfect dude and if I didnt already have two boyfriends and pending then I would totally go for you because you my dear roomie are a catch and if your date doesnt see that I will personally beat him up for you" Donghyuck says as he grabs Soobin's hands to stop him from messing with his outfit

"Wait? What does and pending mean?" Soobin asks as he looks at Donghyuck confused. 

Donghyuck opens his mouth to answer before there is a knock on the door and he stops himself "I think lover boy is here" he says as he smiles at Soobin "go and have fun. Just be yourself okay?" 

Soobin looks at Donghyuck before nodding and hugging the other male quickly "thank you hyung" he says before feeling his phone vibrate in his pocket. 

Lee Felix and Choi Soobin

Lee Felix: hey! 

Lee Felix: I got out of class a little early so I'm on my way to your dorm now but dont rush, I'll wait for you

Choi Soobin: it's fine hyung I'm ready anyway!

Choi Soobin: I'm excited to hang out with you 

Lee Felix: cant wait to see you too cutie 

Chapter Text

Soobin walks outside of his dorm and waits for Felix after getting a text from the male letting him know that he was nearly there. He doesn't have to wait long before he spots Felix and his mouth opens in shock as he takes in the other's appearance.

"Hey" Felix says smiling as he gets close enough to Soobin "damn I was right, you do look beautiful in anything" 


Hearing Felix's words, Soobin's cheeks start to turn red and he brings his hands up to cover them. 
"Hey don't do that, I want to see you're cute blush" Felix says smiling at Soobin as he carefully grabs hold of one of his hands with his only free hand and removes it from his face. It was then that Soobin noticed that Felix had something in his other hand. 


"Are we going on a picnic?" He asks excited as he sees the picnic basket in Felix's hand. 


Felix smiles at Soobin's reaction and nods "yep. I thought that a picnic was the perfect way to get to know each other. Now, let's go so we can get a ready good spot" Felix says before grabbing Soobin's hand and leading him towards the quad. 


It doesn’t take them long to get from Soobin’s dorm to the quad as Soobin’s dorm was conveniently located near the quad. They look around for a few moments before choosing a spot near a tree. “wait right here” Felix says to Soobin before he pulls out a picnic blanket from the basket in his hand. Carefully, he lays the blanket down on the ground making sure that it was flat before he also places the basket down. He opens up the basket and takes out the wide array of food neatly placing it down on the blanket making sure to leave enough room for him and Soobin to sit. Once he was satisfied, he calls Soobin over. 

Chapter Text

[class of suck my dick]


Jenoot: I cannot believe 
Jenoot: I am dating a hoe

JeenieJinnie: how you let your man perform that 


Sloth: he said “i just want you to make it clap” with his entire chest

 
Jenoot: imma smack him when i see him
Jenoot: how dare that little shit perform that song 
Jenoot: I AKSD HIM WHGTA HE WAS PERFMORNIG BEFORE ANS HE SAID NOHING
Jenoot: nothing 


Junnie: the funniest part was jeno dying while watching the perfomce 
Junnie: full out dying 


Sloth: I wish it would have been recorded


[minghao and jeno]


Minghao: ay jeno just wanted to let you know that your boyfriend is probably going to be dead in the next 5 minutes 
Minghao: his brothers were in the audience 


Jeno: FUCK
Jeno: WYH WOULD THEY CHOOSE THIS SHOW 


Minghao: idk but better get your last smooch in while you can

 
[yangyang and jeno]


Jeno: baby where are you so i can kiss you before your brothers get to you


Yangyang: im at my dorm
Yangyang: but youre too late :(
Yangyang: they all yelled at me a lot it was on line 


Jeno: they still see you as a baby, baby 


Yangyang: but im not…
Yangyang: its not like weve done wornjkgn;


Jeno: baby?


Yangyang: Lee Fucking Jeno
Yangyang: did you taint my baby brother


Jeno: …
Jeno: sorry the number you tried to reach is out of service please try again never 

Chapter Text

[Queen has changed the chat name to Kill the Thot]

[Kill the Thot]

Queen: someone better come and get Hansol's ass before I deck tF out of him

Dad: what did he do now-

Queen: he has been ranting for a fjcking hour about how his whole life is just some fucking simulation 

Queen: I'm going to punch whoever let him watch all those marvel movies 

Han Solo: my life IS a simulation 

Han Solo: I'm the latest patient of project T.A.H.I.T.I.

Han Solo: you are all just a document of my imagination 

Han Solo: figment- 

Tiny: Hansol sweetie 

Tiny: aliens arent real

Han Solo: YES THEY ARE 

Han Solo: I'm LIVING PROOF 

Dad: why do you think you're in a simulation 

Han Solo: because I woke up and heard a beeping sound. It was brief before it dissapeared but it proves my thery. 

Han Solo: I was brought back from the dead 

Queen: I will kill you if you EVER wake me up at 6 in the morning for some bullhit like this ever again

Chapter Text

[Bunny and Duckie]

Duckie: Soobinnie
Duckie: Soobinnnnnnn
Duckie: SoObIn
Duckie: C
Duckie: H
Duckie: O
Duckie: I
Duckie: S
Duckie: O
Duckie: O
Duckie: B
Duckie: I
Duckie: N

Bunny: Hyung-
Bunny: what do you want

Duckie: is that anyway to talk to your best friend
Duckie: I am hurt
Duckie: Distraught
Duckie: disappointed

Bunny: hyung I just got home
Bunny: and want to sleeppppp

Duckie: fineeee
Duckie: how do you know Yang Jeongin

Bunny: jeongin?
Bunny: We were in the same orientation group thingy
Bunny: Why

Duckie: I got stuck with Yangyang and Jeno and you get an actual angel
Duckie: THE DISGRWCE

Bunny: Hyung
Bunny: you have a Mork
Bunny: and a Lucas

Duckie: Mork
Duckie: Im going to start calling him that
Duckie: Mork

Bunny: CaN i PlEaSe SlEeP nOw

Duckie: fine

Duckie: Sleep tight bby

Chapter Text

[Yoon Jeonghan has created a new chat I hate you all]
[Yoon Jeonghan has added Lee Jihoon, Moon Byulyi, Mark Lee, Jung Jungkook, Park Junhee to I hate you all]

Lee Jihoon: what the fuck is this

Yoon Jeonghan: language 

Lee Jihoon: fuck you

Yoon Jeonghan: I regret this already 

Lee Jihoon: bye 


Lee Jihoon has left the chat


Yoon Jeonghan has added Lee Jihoon to the chat 

Yoon Jeonghan: anyway
Yoon Jeonghan: so I never actually made a gc after orientation
Yoon Jeonghan: but after orientation I will not be able to deal with these shits alone


Moon Byulyi: LaNgUaGe


Yoon Jeonghan: ANYWAY

Yoon Jeonghan: I am forcing all of you to deal with them with me so prepare 


Yoon Jeonghan has added Shin Ryujin, Lee Jeno, Liu Yangyang, Lee Donghyuk to the chat 


Yoon Jeonghan: friends meet the bane of my existence 


Lee Jeno: Yangyang is kinda possibly grounded rn
Lee Jeno: so he might not talk 
Lee Jeno: unless he steals his phone 
Lee Jeno: again


Lee Donghyuck: that’s what he gets


Jung Jungkook: now im interested what did he do


Lee Jeno: …
Lee Jeno: he performed at open mic night

 
Lee Donghyuck:  and he sung a song about fycking


Yoon Jeonghan: HE DID WHAT


Lee Donghyuck: touch me, tease me, feel me up
Lee Donghyuck: sung it with his whole chest