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I loved you.

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“It was nice seeing y’all, I’m going to get going,” Richie waves before turning to Eddie, “Want a ride, Eds?” He starts walking towards the bright red rental car outside Jade Of The Orient before his friend answers.

“Sure,” Eddie shrugged as he shoved his hands into his pockets. He walked briskly across the parking lot before tucking into the passenger side of the sports car.

“You’re just staying over at the townhouse, right?” Richie asked, looking out the slightly tinted window at Ben and Bev catching up next to Stan, Bill, and Mike who seemed a little too casual about the situation at hand.

“Yeah,” Eddie smiled. Richie nodded and pulled out of the parking lot. He gulped back nerves as he thought about something else from the summer, it wasn’t just Pennywise. It was also a feeling he had or maybe something he learned about himself. He couldn’t quite finger why having Eddie alone was bringing it back so strongly. He was pretty sure it had to do with his anything but latent homosexuality. But, he knew he was gay. He’d known it since… well, since that summer. But, why was it coming back now?

“This is crazy,” He tried to laugh, “I mean, just remembering everything and I mean… This spooky clown stuff is crazy but also just all of Derry, being a kid, my friends, you, just… everything. You know?”

“Yeah,” Eddie said, shrinking into the seat, “It sure is something.” He wanted to ask why Richie listed him separate from the rest of The Losers, but didn’t feel that it was worth the time. It was like the 20+ years of not seeing each other faded away, he felt he knew Richie. This was his best friend, after all.

Richie parked outside the old building and got out of the car, running around the front to open Eddie’s door before he could even unbuckle his seatbelt. He does an exaggerated bow before smirking, “After you, sir!”

“Why thank you! What a gentleman you are, Trashmouth!” Richie shrugs, shoving Eddie lightly as he shoves his large hands into his pockets.

“I try, lovie!” He opens the door to the inn, even more elaborate in his presentation. “Would you like me to walk you up to your room, dearest Eds?”

Eddie laughed, “You don’t have to, man! I mean, you saved me a taxi ri-”

“I was in love with you.” Richie says, suddenly. He seems just as surprised he said it as Eddie was to hear it. He slaps his left hand over his mouth before backing away, “Sorry I- It’s like, I just remembered and-”

Eddie walks towards him, reaching up to kiss him, lightly. “It’s okay,” He whispers, smiling and ignoring the fact that he still has a wife. That’s only a technicality, he figures. He’s been meaning to divorce her for years and just hasn’t gotten around to it.

“Seriously?” Richie whispers, resisting the urge to brush his hand over his lips, “I mean you’re- I just…” For once, he was at a loss for words.

“You can still walk me to my room,” Eddie says, letting his hand glaze down Richie’s side and grab his hand, “It would be nice to catch up.”

“Yeah, okay, cool,” Richie nods his head so furiously that Eddie fears his glasses will fall off.

The maybe thirty seconds it takes to walk up the steps and to the small bedroom Eddie rented for the week feels like three eternities stacked on top of each other in a trenchcoat.

Eddie walks in and sits on the bed, motioning for Richie to come closer. Richie moves as if in a vague trance over to his preadolescent crush and puts a hand on his thigh. They don’t really talk as Eddie pulls him closer, once again, and kisses him with a slow passion.

“You’re so pretty, Eds. I mean it, you grew u-” Eddie shushes him and begins to unbutton Richie’s shirt. He slides his hands over the man's shoulders and down his arms before throwing the shirt to the side. Eddie runs his hand over Richie’s now bare chest, letting himself linger near his nipples and shockingly sharp collarbones.

Eddie leans in to kiss him again, slowly moving his mouth down Richie’s neck and chest as he fiddles with his pants.

“Wow, eager, are we?” Richie giggles, nervously, as he works on Eddie’s shirt. His hands feel uncomfortably numb and large as he tries to figure out the buttons.

Eddie giggles, “I can just do it.”

“I swear,” Richie stands up, pulling his pants off to reveal teddy bear boxers, “You must have like… special extra small buttons that are impossible to get off or something.”

Eddie laughs, putting the rest of his clothes in a neat pile at the end of the bed. “Nope, you’re just a giant.”

“You always struck me as a briefs man,” Richie changes the topic after giving his friend a once over.

“Shut up, Trashmouth,” Eddie murmurs, pulling Richie on top of him as he lays down and kisses him again. Richie grinds down against him and moves his mouth in a desperate fashion as his hips speed up. He feels as if he could cum in his pants like a teenager simply because it’s Eddie Kasprak. He’s hooking up with Eddie Fucking Kaspbrak.

Richie inches his hands along the waistline of Eddie’s underwear, slowly pulling it down and off of his thighs and putting it with the rest of his clothes. He leans back and bites his lip, slowly massaging himself through his boxers as he takes in Eddie’s soft body.

Eddie nods as if reading his mind and points to a large bag. Richie goes over to it and tears it open. It’s mostly full of medication but as he digs he finds a small bottle of lube and a package of condoms.

“I didn’t know why I brought it until you…” Eddie muttered, moving to lean against the headboard and spreading his legs.

Richie tries to smile and make a little joke, but he couldn’t think with the man splayed out for him like this. How could anyone? It was Eddie Fucking Kaspbrak, for god's sake!

Finally, he steps forward and coats his fingers in the gel. Eddie nods and pushes his ass out a little. “Fuck,” Richie whispers, slowly pushing one of his fingers into the smaller man. Eddie instantly gasps, clearly not accustomed to the wonders of gay sex.

Richie speeds up his finger before adding a second. Eddie whines as he scissors them quickly before moving them in and out, again. By the time Richie has three fingers inside of him, Eddie is pushing against him with more desperation than anyone would have expected from such a high strung fellow.

“Please, Rich,” He begs, his voice about nine hundred octaves higher than normal.

Richie curses as he wipes his hands on the blanket. He pulls off his boxers and tosses them to the side.

“Oh my god, Rich,” Eddie exclaims, looking over Richie’s dick, “You’re…”

“What? Did you think I was lying all those times I told you guys my meat was huge?” He laughs, rolling a condom over himself. “Ready, Eddie Spaghetti?”

“Fuck, yes,” Eddie leans back, waiting to feel Richie inside of him.

Richie takes his time moving the head of his cock into Eddie with a tender precision. He inches into him slowly, terrified of hurting someone he cares so much for.

Before he can get halfway inside of the other man, however, Eddie pushes himself, harshly, onto Richie, forcing him to bottom out.

“Holy shit, Eds,” Richie moans, falling forward a bit and pinning Eddie’s arms over his head. He gives himself a minute to catch his breath and look over Eddie before he moves out, only to shove himself back into Eddie less than a second later.

Richie moves himself in and out, quickly and passionately. He relishes in the sharp whines and begging from Eddie. He sits back further and moves his hands to grip Eddie’s waste, lifting the smaller man up to fuck into him from a better angle.

“Shit,” Eddie practically screams, “There! Rich, there, please!” Eddie spasms against Richie as he works to make sure to hit that spot, over and over as Eddie’s speech devolves into a mantra of his name.

“Close,” Richie mutters, his movements becoming far more frantic and desperate.

“Yes,” Eddie cries, “Please, touch me, Rich.”

Richie moves on of his hands from its place on Eddie’s hip, glancing at the slight bruise it’s left before flicking his wrist over Eddie’s leaking cock. Within three strokes, Eddie is coming over his own chest and into Richie’s hand.

“Fuck,” Richie whispers, unable to process how beautiful Eddie looked like this. He finishes deep inside of Eddie soon after.

Richie collapses onto the bed next to his friend, his glasses were fogged up and his legs feel like jelly. He throws the condom away before fully laying back. “Wanted that… Wanted that for so long.”

“Yeah?” Eddie smirked, snuggling against Richie’s bare chest and, for once, not minding the mess around him. “Me too.”