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Green Haired Monster

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Look, it wasn’t like it had been Tony’s decision. 

He didn’t tell the barber to put the streaks in– and okay, so maybe just letting the guy do ‘whatever you want buddy, I’m running on three hours sleep and I’m only here because Pepper said she’d have my ass if I didn’t’ probably hadn’t been the best idea that he’d ever had. 


That didn’t mean he should get the whole entire blame for the blonde streaks that had been put into his hair—

And it certainly didn’t mean that he deserved to have a blast of magic thrown at his goddamn head. 

“What the fuck, Loki?” Tony demanded, his hands immediately going to his head, worried that his hair had all been burned off or something– but, thankfully, his fingers threaded through his usual lustrous locks. 

Loki’s face was pale, his eyes wide as he stared at Tony in horror– and yeah, that wasn’t really helping Tony’s current state of stress much, either. Not to mention that Clint’s sudden burst of raucous laughter was more than enough to let Tony know that the magic had done something awful, even if Tony’s hair was still all in place. 

“Loki, what—”

“I’m sorry,” Loki said quickly, almost brokenly, shaking his head and taking a step back. “I didn’t mean—” he cut himself off, his voice cracking with… well, surely it wasn’t terror? Loki had played a hell of a lot of tricks since he had started to live with the Avengers in the tower, and Tony had never truly been mad at him for it. He didn’t think he could get mad at Loki, actually. Not… truly. Not in the way that he could get mad at say… Steve, for instance. 

“Didn’t mean to do what, exactly?” Tony asked– and yeah, he wasn’t mad, but his voice was laced with the kind of wariness that bordered on sharp. “Loki, what did you—” 

It was Tony’s turn to bite off the end of his sentence– as there was no point in finishing it when its intended audience fled the living room in a sudden shimmer of green seiðr. 

Well… shit. 

Tony turned to one of the only two other people left in the room, his eyes narrowing dangerously. 

“Clint, what was it?” He asked. “Come on, what did he—”

“Just, look, in a mirror, Tony,” Clint said, near on choking as his words were broken up by gasped laughs.

Well, there was no easily accessible mirror in the living room, but– fumbling with near on panicked fingers, Tony quickly pulled his phone from his pocket, opened the camera app and flipped the screen—

And what he saw caused his breath to catch in his throat. 

When he had left the barber less than an hour before, his hair had been streaked right through with golden highlights of light blonde. And, again– he hadn’t asked for it, all right? But, hey, he was Tony Stark. He could pull off anything in conjunction with a cocky smirk and a wink. It would be fine, there was no need to dye it all back to his usual dark brown.

Except… there was no longer any blonde to be seen, nor a single brown hair in sight. 

Instead of the chocolate curls he’d had his whole life… he now possessed a mane of bright, shocking emerald. 



This was fine. 

He was Tony Stark. Tony Stark could pull off anything, anything in the world. He just needed a cocky smirk. And. Maybe. A box of brown hair dye. 

This would be—

“Wouldn’t it be funny if Loki’s magic made this stick,” Clint cackled, practically rolling around on the couch now. “If you couldn’t make it turn ba—”

Clint wasn’t cut off by a crack in his voice nor by someone disappearing. Oh no, his words were throttled when a pillow crashed into his stupid grinning face. 

Tony was on his feet from the moment the pillow left his hand, hurrying toward the elevator, his jaw aching as he fought not to gnash his teeth. This– this was a step too far—

He was stopped before he could make it all the way across the room, however. 

Thor – who, until this moment, had been worryingly quiet and wearing a rather thoughtful frown which Tony might have found rather suspicious, had he not already had rather a lot on his mind – caught Tony by the arm, halting him in his tracks. 

“Tony,” Thor said, his blue eyes serious– well, at least until they gained a slight amused glint as his gaze shifted up to Tony’s hair for half a second. 

“What?” Tony asked. “Look, I’ve got somewhere to be, someone to talk to, you know?” 

“Yes, and when you do… do not be too harsh on him,” Thor said. “Loki rarely acts without reason– you need only be patient, and listen to what it is that he has to say.” 

Tony was about to snap back– but he paused. Perhaps he was overreacting a little? It was just… his hair, right? It was, it was fine—

Well. He almost convinced himself at any rate, but even so he had to admit that Thor had made something of a point. He knew Loki well enough to be able to guess that he was going to be on the defensive about this. The only way Tony was going to be able to get a straight answer, let alone an apology or a solution, was if he approached this carefully. 


“Okay, Thor,” he said. “I promise. I’ll listen.” 

Thor gave a firm nod, and let him go—

And then Tony was off like a rat out of an aqueduct, speeding down the hall and into the elevator. 

The only, singular problem with having an elevator that was run by JARVIS was that he couldn’t get the sweet satisfaction of slamming his hands desperately against buttons, but he could at least shout for JARVIS to get him to Loki as quickly as he could—

Which, yeah, look at that. Thank god for JARVIS– if the AI hadn’t been able to work out where Loki had disappeared to, Tony would have had nothing more than just his own best guess. 

As soon as the elevator opened he stormed to the door which led to Loki’s rooms, and knocked. As he did so, an emerald streak fell into his face– and… if in that moment he hadn’t heard Loki walk through his room, Tony would’ve smiled and blown it away with a sharp puff of air. 

He was nervous, all of a sudden. The earlier desire to get to Loki, to see him and talk to him, listen to him as he’d promised Thor, was still there only— 

He moved the green strand away in a quick movement and knocked again, because— 

Loki opened the door silently. His eyes ran quickly from Tony’s eyes up to his hair, then back down and to the side, staring at the apparently unbelievably fascinating wall behind Tony. He swallowed. 

“Hi,” Tony said, because what he might hate more than people who put mushrooms on pizza was an awkward silence. “Long time no see.” 

Loki stiffened in the doorframe, his hand holding the door with a strength that had Tony fearing he would have to replace the door tomorrow. 

“Can I come in?” he asked gently. 

Loki nodded, and then moved back to let him in, the door shutting closed with a soft thud

Loki was silent. His eyes hovered over Tony’s shoulder and that was… not like Loki, not the one Tony knew anyway. Tony sighed. Okay so, he wasn’t all that fond of his hair being turned green, that was true but—

It wasn’t like the world was going to end because of that. There’d be hair dye and if worst came to worst, he could go and buy a wig. Pepper for sure would love to buy him one, since she’d been behind getting Tony a new haircut for a few years now. Really, he didn’t even know why. His hair looked good on him, if he could say that about himself. 

Yeah, he could. When he threw a cocky grin into it, then it most certainly did look awesome, just as everything else ever had. 

“I’m not angry because you turned my hair green,” he eventually said as Loki continued to stare over his shoulder. “I was...” Fuuuck, find a word for it, Tony, “–surprised by it.” 

“Surprised,” Loki echoed quietly– and his eyes darted to Tony’s for a split second. “I did not mean for it to happen.” 

“I got the feeling.” Tony grinned, but when Loki gave no response, that grin turned to a frown. “Then why did it happen in the first place?” 

Loki grimaced visibly. “You know that my seiðr is an extension of myself, yes?”

“Sure. You gave Clint a wonderful lecture a good while ago when he asked you to turn your magic yellow and, how this is your colour, and all that, right?” 

Loki stared at him. “Yes,” he said. “That’s what I meant.” 

Somehow Tony got the feeling that that wasn’t the case. But who was he to call Loki out on his lies? A small smile formed on his lips. 

“The blonde.” Loki hissed that word with such venom that Tony felt his eyebrows raise in shock. “It reminded me of Thor, and I—” He broke off and shook his head, dark hair sliding over his shoulders. “Why would you want to look like Thor?” Loki looked at him with wide eyes. “Thor is Thor, and you are you. You don’t have any reason at all to imitate his looks. You look better with your hair, it reminds me of chocolate and of—” He stopped. Again.

Oh, Tony thought, blinking at Loki. That made a surprising amount of sense

Loki sighed and ran a hand over his face, looking completely done as his eyes searched Tony’s. “Neither my seiðr nor I want you to look like the oaf,” he added quietly. “You look great as you are and I—”

There were a lot of things to be addressed here. Tony licked his lips as his mind raced against this irresponsible urge inside of him to forget thinking and to simply act because— 

“Green is your colour,” he said, his mouth running before he thought he’d placed all the puzzle pieces together into a picture. But, was it truly so difficult to understand? His hair was dipped in Loki’s colour, Loki thought he looked great, and didn’t want him to look like Thor. And okay, this was a bold assumption. If he was wrong, then he probably could only hope that JARVIS was going to send Mark IX after him within seconds because Loki was going to throw him out of a window and— 

Tony reached for the soft green tunic Loki wore, clutched it between his fingers and pulled the Trickster in, who’d been taken by surprise and followed the pull easily— 

And Tony stood on his toes – because fuck, Loki was tall, okay? – and his lips met Loki’s in a kiss. 

Had he ever thought that one day he was going to kiss a god? Most likely, because he was Tony Stark and gods only existed in beds or were named Pepper Potts who put up with all his crap. There were no electrical bolts running over his skin as he caressed thin lips in slow movements, nor did the world stop spinning but— 

For Tony it could have in that moment. His eyes were closed and he swallowed Loki’s shocked gasp with ease, refusing to let go of the tunic as it was the only thing which made him stay upright as his brain stopped existing for a moment. There was no goal to the kiss, no attempt to lure his elected partner into his bed with a promise that good times were about to be had. It was simply a kiss

And it felt fantastic, cool, and Loki’s hands were on his hips, helping to hold him up. Loki didn’t seem to be planning on throwing him out of the window either, his lips eager to meet Tony’s in a breeze of want that robbed his breath. 

Perhaps Tony hadn’t been so wrong with his assumption.

He broke their kiss with regret, took a breath and then planted another short, sweet kiss to Loki’s lips. Loki watched him under half closed lids, the green of his eyes turning darker by the second. 

“For the record, I didn’t want the blonde to be in there. My barber did it and I thought I was just going to roll with it,” he explained with a breathless grin. “But I feel like you did a much better job with the green anyway.” 

Loki’s hands flexed on his lips. “I can turn it back,” he offered. “To brown.” 

“Brown. Yes. Sounds good.” Tony winked and licked his lips. “We can dye my hair green again another day.” 

“Careful, I might take you up on that offer.” Loki’s green eyes were still watching him intently. 

“Good. I might take you out for dinner after my hair colour is back, does that sound good?” 

Now it was Loki’s turn to blink at him, seemingly at a loss for words. 

“Yes, Tony, that sounds good,” Tony said amusedly. “I’m looking forward to it, Tony. I prefer red wine to white, Tony, that might be useful to know so that you can choose the restaurant accordingly.” 

Loki chuckled at that and his eyes became softer. “You guessed right.” He raised an arm and stroked his fingers over Tony’s hair, giving it a gentle tug and okay, that was nice—

“It is back to its proper colour,” Loki announced and stepped back. 

“Back?” Tony started to beam. “I need to see!” He yelled and ran to where he hoped Loki’s bathroom was, ripping the door open and storming to the basin to look into the mirror. 

It wasn’t like he didn’t trust Loki’s word but— 

Sometimes seeing helped to believe.

Tony ran a hand through his delightfully dark and brown hair, sighing happily. 

Loki liked seeing him in green.


It was almost a shame his hair colour had already returned, it would’ve made nice for a date to go with a gift from Loki, right? But— 

A grin started to spread on his lips. He still had a green tie from the last shopping tour Pepper had forced him to do and he hadn’t taken her out yet. Perhaps it was time to baptise that baby. 

“It looks awesome,” Tony announced as he left the bathroom, his hair half a mess, half styled. He blamed the magic touch for that. “Thank you,” he added as he went back to Loki. “And you better go and get dressed. When I’m back in a few, I expect you to be ready. This is going to be glorious!” 

Loki looked at him bewildered. 

“All right?” Tony nodded to himself. “Gotcha. Gonna be fun. A suit wouldn’t go amiss.” He let his eyes run over Loki, thinking about the last time he’d seen his teammate dressed up nicely. It’s been far too long since he saw Loki in a suit. 

Last time had been at a fundraiser. Or something. 

“I can do that,” Loki replied, his voice hoarse.

“Awesome.” Tony didn’t even think about it before he pressed another kiss to Loki’s lips. 

It was a long kiss. 

Tony drew back, slightly dazed. “Good. I need to go and get something and then we can leave—”

“What do you need?” 

“A green tie.” Tony patted Loki’s chest, and swallowed. “And maybe a jacket to go over the shirt.”

Loki nodded and a green shimmer was running over Tony and— 

“Okay, now that is handy.” Tony looked down at himself, the green tie hanging loosely around his neck and he was now wearing a dark jacket. Perfect. And Loki looked delicious too, with the same long jacket and scarf he’d worn back in Stuttgart. 

“Ready to go?” Tony asked, feeling excited. 

Loki nodded, a smile painted across his lips and he carefully reached for Tony’s hand, weaving their fingers together. 

And this time, the excitement was less because of nervous tension. It was a thrill of anticipation and Loki shot him a disbelieving look that slowly started to fill with wonder the closer they came to the exit. 

Tony decided he loved the date already. 

And the green, of course—

And he smiled as he touched his fingers to the tie once more, which he’d noticed was now somehow a dark emerald hue, and not the lighter tone it had been when he’d bought it.