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you got me feeling like a psycho

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the hufflepuff common room was perfectly quiet and peaceful. inside, there were a few students keeping to themselves and a fire that was dying out. soobin needed the perfect atmosphere for his writing, and after half an hour of searching (most of which were spent trying to solve the riddle the ravenclaw common room entrance asked, but it did not work out for soobin) he finally settled. soobin was surprised to find it so tranquil and he did not want to jinx it.

soobin had a problem. in reality, soobin had several problems, starting with his lack of heart stickers because he had not been rationing them out and had no opportunity to replenish his stationery and sticker collection. currently, soobin was trying to focus on the two problems that were currently affecting him.

problem one, he had a massive crush on yeonjun.

problem two, soobin could not get into his writing mood.

in order to cope with his feelings, soobin liked to write letters. on days that soobin stared at yeonjun just a second too long, or when he spaced out during history of magic more than usual while daydreaming, soobin wrote letters.

in soobin’s own humble opinion, it was a great system. soobin was able to live another day to watch yeonjun smile at his teammates after quidditch practices which made his heart flutter and no one ever had to know.

soobin was not very confident when it came to expressing himself. he was passionate of course, but he feared saying the wrong thing, or saying something and having it be interpreted incorrectly. soobin wanted to be understood and he wanted to understand himself. writing letters to yeonjun helped soobin understand exactly what he had been feeling whenever he saw the older boy.

however, he was also very particular. soobin needed a very specific environment to write. it had to be calm, but not boring. someplace that was not bursting with activity, but also not completely empty. soobin had waited all day to find time to work on a letter after seeing yeonjun teasingly wink at taehyun in the dining hall during breakfast and it had been a struggle finding a spot he could use to write once he finally caught a break.

the hufflepuff common room was perfect. soobin felt like he could finally breathe for the first time since the incident. he carefully pulled his materials out and got to work.

as always, soobin spared no detail. he made sure to include everything about the way yeonjun’s eyes sparkled and how his laugh made even the most charming veela’s envious of him. soobin may have spent a little too much describinig yeonjun’s nose that must have been sculpted by donatello himself, but soobin could not help it if someone could ski down the perfect angle.

soobin let out a sigh once he was done, feeling both embarassed and relieved. he was well aware how incredibly cheesy the letter was, but it didn’t matter because he would lock it in his trunk under his bed then throw them away when he returned home for the holidays. once soobin put the letter away, it would never see the light of day again.

soobin neatly arranged his cute bunny stickers on the letter. he preferred the hearts, but bunnies were the second best option. he closed the envelope and used his quill to write yeonjun’s name in the best attempt at calligraphy he could manage. soobin nodded at his work and shoved the letter into his bag.

out of sight, out of mind.

“what’s that? what did you just write for yeonjun for? i hardly see the two of you interact. is that a howler? are you pranking him?” soobin jumped at the sound of hueningkai’s voice rapidfiring questions from directly behind him. hueningkai was his best friend, but somehow soobin could never hear the boy approach.

“merlin’s beard,” soobin exclaimed, swatting at the younger boy’s arm which was currently reaching for soobin’s bag.

“what did you write? i want to see! is this why you’re late to our study session? you are literally never late but when i make the plans suddenly you have more important things to do.” hueningkai huffed at the end.

soobin cursed. he had completely forgotten about the study session. hueningkai made soobin write it in his planner to make it official.

“i’m so sorry kai, i forgot,” soobin explained honestly. “but i can head the library with you now? i was just finishing up.”

hueningkai agreed after demanding a hug in return because of soobin’s tardiness and the two boys walked together to the library.

“is everyone going to be there?” soobin asked, referring to their group of friends, to which hueningkai nodded in response.

he often felt like it was hueningkai’s friendgroup and soobin was just a tag-along. it wasn’t that they did not include him–in fact they actively tried to get him to join their conversations and silly antics– soobin was just incredibly shy. since hueningkai had introduced soobin to the group he had started to come out of his shell a bit, talking to beomgyu and taehyun a little more. still, soobin did not have the confidence to always join their group when they spent time together. this was mostly because of his inability to interact or function around yeonjun. the older boy was kind to soobin and smiled at him often, but soobin would do his best to immerse himself in his work or pretend to take interest in other things, not wanting to give himself away.

soobin wished he could be like beomgyu. a brave gryffindor, someone who wasn’t afraid of taking risks. or taehyun, smart and mature ravenclaw who could clearly express himself. yeonjun was also wise and cunning, he seemed to know how to get what he wanted. even hueningkai who was a hufflepuff like soobin was better at being open. his friendliness extended to everyone and he talked about his feelings with his friends when he needed to.

soobin wanted to be anyone but himself sometimes.

“what are you thinking about?” hueningkai interupted his thoughts, his eyes wide and curious.

“just how lame i am,” soobin answered with a joking tone, half smiling at him.

“you aren’t lame,” hueningkai argued, looking very offended on soobin’s behalf. “you’re sweet, fun to be around, sincere and calming. being around you makes me happy! you’re my best friend for a reason.”

“thank you kai,” soobin smiled at the younger. he had not expected the small outburst, but he appreciated the kind words. “you’re my best friend too.”

“good. oh look, i see beomgyu, taehyun, and yeonjun! you can give yeonjun your letter.” they were approaching the library but thankfully they weren’t close enough for the other three to hear them.

“oh, yeah,” soobin chuckled nervously. “don’t mention it though please? it’s uh- it’s a surprise.” he couldn’t help but lie. soobin was not going to willingly give yeonjun the letter, but he did not want hueningkai to ask why or become suspicous of him.

they joined their friends and soobin quickly started his astronomy homework, not wanting to attract any unwanted attention from his friends. knowing that the letter was in his bag instead of his room made soobin antsy, so he wanted to finish up in the library as soon as possible.

luckily enough for soobin, everyone was quite busy with homework and there wasn’t much conversation. after what felt like ages, the group parted ways and soobin was able to escape to his room. he immdiately collapsed onto his bed feeling exhausted.

perhaps if soobin had checked his bag before going to bed the night prior, he would not be in his current uncomfortable situation. he had been so tired after hours of studying he hadn’t bothered to check his bag and put the letter away. although, soobin wasn’t sure if he could have done much if had noticed it missing last night anyways. he just wanted something to blame.

soobin was currently in a secluded hallway with yeonjun who asked to speak with him after breakfast. he had no clue what the older needed to talk to him for, but he couldn’t help but feel nervous regardless. he stared at yeonjun, waiting for him to start the conversation.

“so... i got your letter,” yeonjun paused to pull out a familiar envelope from his robe. “and um, i read it.”

soobin couldn’t believe his eyes. he cleared his throat, trying to speak as calmly as he could. “where did you get that?”

yeonjun looked at him confused. “huening gave it to me, he said he knew you would forget so-”

“you-you weren’t supposed to see that, oh my god.” soobin made to grab the letter, his cheeks and ears turning a bright red. he could feel the heat in his face. “i’m so sorry, please forget everything you read, please.”

yeonjun held the letter out of his grasp. “forget everything? that’s not fair, i wanted to ask you to try skiing down the slope of my nose.” he had a smile on his face but soobin was too focused on trying to grab the letter to notice.

soobin huffed, sinking down to the floor. he felt like his embarassment was about to consume him. “i know it was stupid, please shut up.” he covered his face with his hands.

soobin felt guilty. his friendgroup had done so much to include him and he was ruining it. now yeonjun was going to hate him and he had do something unless he wanted his friends to split up. “i know you must find me so weird right now but please don’t stop being friends with kai, he doesn’t have anything to do with this. and i promise i’ll stay away from you just please don’t tell anyone.” his hands muffled his words but yeonjun could still hear him.

“what? soobin, hey,” yeonjun crouched down in front of the younger boy, trying to remove his hands from his face. “why are you saying all this?”

“because you must hate me now,” soobin gulped.

“hate you? no soobin i-” yeonjun laughed, finally prying soobin’s hands away from his face. “soobin i like you too. and your bunny stickers are cute. they look like you.”

“you like me as a friend still? we’re still friends?” soobin asked, relief clear in his voice.

yeonjun laughed again. “no, not as a friend.” there was only one way soobin would get the message. yeonjun leaned forward and pressed his lips against soobin’s.

soobin, to say the least, was shocked. yeonjun pulled away before he could even respond.

“you’re not going to kiss me back?” the older boy pouted.

soobin surged forward, connecting their lips again. the kiss was soft and firm. soobin felt lightheaded and warm. was this real? soobin wanted to pinch himself to check, but he didn’t want to be weird while he was kissing yeonjun.

even though the angle they were at was quite awkward considering they were both on the ground, the kiss was perfect. so perfect, in fact, that soobin didn’t want to pull away. it was yeonjun who eventually disconnected, chuckling as he did. both of their faces were flushed.

“um,” soobin started. “the bunny stickers are subpar. i only used them because i was running short on my heart stickers.”

yeonjun smiled at him and grabbed soobin’s hand, lifting the two of them up. “thank you for telling me that you purposely put no effort into your sticker use on your love letter to me. that is exactly what i wanted to hear after our first kiss. are you going to break up with me using penguin stickers?”

“break up,” soobin repeated, his eyes wide. “are we a couple now?”

“do you want to be?” yeonjun looked as nervous as soobin felt.

soobin quickly nodded. if it were possible for his cheeks to turn a darker shade of red, then they just had.

yeonjun let out a sigh of relief. “thank merlin. i really like you, i didn’t want you to say no.”

soobin couldn’t help but smile, he had no words to express how happy he felt. “i really like you too. i have about 10 other letters to prove it.”

“there are more? can i read them? i want to know if you have ever written about my abs.” yeonjun looked like an excited puppy. soobin quickly shook his head.

“look at the time! i think i’m going to be late to class, i think i’ll have to go now-” soobin quickly collected his things. there was no way his blush was going to disappear.

“we have the same class this morning-” yeonjun started.

“bye yeonjun! i’ll see you later boyfriend.” soobin pressed a quick kiss to yeonjun’s cheek and ran down the hallway as fast as he could. yeonjun remained in his place, a dopey smile on his face.

“you called me your boyfriend!”

-

taehyun frowned, looking up at hueningkai and beomgyu. “yeonjun and soobin have been gone for a while. what are they up to?"

hueninkai smiled proudly. “if everything has gone according to plan, they are probably making out in a closet right now.”

beomgyu snorted. “haha. they’re in the closet.”

taehyun and hueningkai both groan. they might as well get used to hanging out as a trio.