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Aggressive Empathy in the Abyss (AEITA)

Chapter Text

[1]

It was raining.

It was always raining these days, always drizzling tears that made him shiver and quake. It was raining and dark and there was the sound of his brother’s rumbles but Raphael wasn’t here, he was at home, but--

The sky was clear. Why was the sky clear? Why could he see all of the stars and--

He could see Venus. The little planet--it really isn’t all that little, about the size of Earth, actually--glowed in the black abyss, snailing its way across the sky.

How did he know it was Venus? Astrology had never really been his strong suit. He was lucky if he could find the Little Dipper.

But there she was, glowing and shining and--

Raph?

 

[2]

“Raph?”

He was in his room, in his bed. Raph was there, too, and Leo was wrapped up in his arms, and Raph was rumbling, and he was shivering and cold and--

“Why am I wet?” he wiggled a little to look Raphael in the eye. Why would he leave him wet? That wasn’t very considerate. He could at least dry the poor turtle off.

“What?” Raph giggled. He shifted and Leo realized he was in Raph’s lap, his heels against strong thighs. His tail flicked, then curled around and under the warm thing beneath it.

“Why am I wet?” Leo was shaking now, confused and frightened. He didn’t remember anything from before the rooftop, the frigid rain.

“You ain’t wet, Fearless.”

“Yes--” he paused, realizing what had happened--”I’m not wet.”

“No, Leo.”

“It was just a dream.”

“You had a nightmare, yeah.”

“A dream.”

“Uh-huh…”

“…Stay…”

“Sure.”

 

[3]

Raphael awoke alone several hours later, Chompy nestled between the two pillows and his own head rested on Leo’s plush sea turtle Captain Silver.

There’s was a note on Leo’s nightstand--well, it might as well have bee Raph’s by this point. He’d been the only one to use it in the last month or so after all. The alien trilled while his owner grumbled agitatedly, the paper crinkling as it was unfolded.

The note read:

 

Raphie,

I got restless; I don’t know how you sleep so long, but I envy the ability. You know where to find me.

<3 L

 

He grabbed Chompy around the middle and exited the room.

The green-eyed terrapin had the urge to grab a pen and grammar-check his brother’s note, just to watch his face puff up and turn red with embarrassment, but he figured it wasn’t a morning for smartass-ness. Leonardo had left notes for him all month, alternating between signing with a heart and with a tilde. Raph didn’t know how to respond to the hearts.

“If he starts randomly showing affection--more than usual, I mean--you need to tell me.”

They were only fifteen when Donnie had to start lecturing him and Mikey about trauma and PTSD and flashbacks. It was too young for anyone to need to worry about such things, too young for anyone to have to experience it themselves. Too young to worry every time their brother was alone.

But that was all years ago! Surely Leonardo was better, recovered. He was okay, because Raph had promised Mikey that their big br was okay, they didn’t need to worry anymore, IT’S OKAY .

But is he really?

 

[4]

It was raining. It was raining and cold and the sky was clear and Raph wasn’t here, but Leo could hear him rumbling and he could see Venus and he could see the moon and the stars and--

Sensei?

 

[5]

Leonardo!

Hai , Father!” Leo jumped straight to his feet he was so startled. He whipped around to face his sensei, a sheepish smile on his lips.

“You are distracted, my son.”

Hai , Father.”

“Why?”

Leo thought about the question. Really there were many answers: his recent nightmares were extremely troubling, not to mention tiring. They left him weary and disoriented for days but they weren’t scary , per say, just… eerie.

Then there was Raphael.

It wasn’t that his hotheaded brother was giving him a hard time, but rather that, lately, he hadn’t been… and Leonardo wasn’t sure how to feel about that. He knew how he did feel--honestly, he kind of missed the confrontation, the… what was the right word for it?--but he doubted that was how he should feel.

In the end, he decided to be honest and concise: “I’ve been having some really weird dreams lately, and I’m figuring something with Raph out… both things have me pretty off balance, and I’m really just tense. I’m alright, though, Father.”

Splinter nodded slowly, a calculating glint in his eyes. Leonardo stood still, holding eye contact in the hope that the rat would see something he didn’t, discover something he himself had overlooked. It was terrifying.

What do you see, Father?

Confusion. Concern. Bewilderment and disbelief flashed through the unguarded gaze of his father, the mocha colored orbs widening in comprehension as their owner drew up a conclusion, a theory to be tested and, likely, proven true. Then, like a steel trap catching a fawn’s leg, the eyes hardened, the walls went up, and the Gaze of Disappointment and Scolding emerged. A clawed hand came up to rest on the young terrapin’s shoulder and the ninja master looked ready to say something--to give a command or issue a scolding for some wrong the leader didn’t know he’d committed. The eyes went purposely blank and the snout closed as the shoji door slid open, the second eldest turtle stepping inside the dojo.

“Oh, hey, Papa .*” {*“Dad.”}

“Raphael.” Master Splinter took note of the soft look the two turtles shared, and the quick nod of his eldest. They were both guarded, closed off to him but they seemed to have a perfect understanding of one another. How odd…

“How ya’ doin’, Fearless?”

“I’m okay…”

From the moment he’d walked into the room, the red-banded terrapin knew something was up. Splinter had that look in his eyes, the one that said Leo fucked up. But Leonardo had that look that said I don’t know what I did wrong , and it set something ugly off in his stomach, something… possessive .

“Wanna go out into the tunnels for a bit?” he arched a brow, tilting his head in silent, secret suggestion. Father wouldn’t know what the purpose was, but he knew Leo did. It showed in the glint that appeared in the azure orbs.

Their father was not appreciative of being left out of the loop--and the deep flush and hesitant nod of his eldest did nothing to reassure him. My sons, what are you doing?

Before he could issue any inquiry on the matter, Raphael was nodding, turned around and out of the dojo without another word. He didn’t turn his head, but the rat sensed his gaze as it traveled back to them.

“Is there anything else, Master?”

He turned back to his eldest and eyed the turtle critically. He was hiding something, telling half-truths and sneaking behind his elder’s back. Splinter wouldn’t tolerate it, but he didn’t have the evidence he needed to pursue the matter any further right now. Blue locked on brown and the father felt his heart squeeze at the unshielded turmoil he saw in his dear son’s eyes. “No, my son.” He said softly. “You may go.”

Hamato Yoshi looked on solemnly as the turtle followed after his brother.

Chapter Text

[1]

“Try this one.”

Leo attempts to blink away the bright, swirling shapes from his vision, squinting through them to see the purple leaf (at least, it looked like a leaf) posed to his lips. His thin tongue, once bright pink but now a mottled brown from the special batch of brownies Raph made, slipped out to draw the new toxin in, his teeth closing around it once the emerald and brown fingers were pulled away. The purple, papery alien pleasure crunched pleasantly, filling Leonardo’s mouth with a sweet, almost sugary flavor. His first swallow was of juice and saliva, his second of purple much that made Raph’s eyes pink and his skin red. The colorful shapes danced and blended with the backward tint of the world and he couldn’t help but giggle at the relaxed, happy grin on his brother’s face. He bobbed his head slowly, eyelids drooping slightly as the drug took effect, a slow, deep, soothing thrum echoing through his head as his nerves began to tingle and a hot touch of arousal licked at his loins.

“Guess I’m gonna hafta ask Mona fer some more’a it, huh?” Leo didn’t really know what was being said to him, but giggled and nodded anyway. Raph was happy, and he felt good , so why shouldn’t he be happy? Did it matter what was going on if Raphael was smiling that easy, serene smile?

Raphael smirked at the blissed-out, completely gone turtle in front of him. He could tell that Leo wasn’t actually answering him, probably didn’t even realize he was being spoken to directly. He’d tried the leaves himself a few days prior and hadn’t, according to Mona Lisa and Slash, couldn’t tell left from right or up from down. “You don’t even know what the fuck I’m sayin’, do ya’?”

A small chirp left the leader in response and he bared his throat in invitation, closing his eyes. A red and violet hand reached out and caressed his neck, sticky fingers playing along his swollen scent gland. The giggly turtle churred happily, his wet tail thumping a gentle song against the ground beneath him. The ruby digits danced up to his chin and squeezed gently, prompting him to open his eyes. He stared wide-eyed and dumb at the white and pink orbs.

“You’re so cute when you’re all doped up, ya’ know that?”

The pink irises of his brother’s eyes were becoming more and more swallowed by the dot of white within them, taking over the space until there was little more than a small ring of fuschia surrounding the lumps of coal. Another hand rose to caress the leafy face.

“Yer lips are all swollen from that prickly one ya’ like so much…” a thumb pulled delicately at his bottom lip.

His mind, inhibited by the sweet poison Raph had him so very attached to, registered the appendage teasing his mouth as a treat--subsequently, he opened his jaw, wrapped his tongue around it, and dragged it inside to gnaw on.

“Ouch! Fuck, Leo, don’t bite it!”

The treat--it must have been one of the buggy ones, like the slugs they’d slurped the innards out of earlier--tried to retreat, pulling from between his lightly clenched teeth. He ran his tongue along it and absently noted its soft-and-then-hard texture. A backward slug?

Slug = bite, suck, swallow; backward-slug = swallow, suck, chew?

He tried it, swallowing around the thick sweet and then sucking to get the firm innards out. A soft moan escaped him as the backward slug ( guls? ) pressed and rubbed against his tongue. Its dull teeth (tooth?) slid across his taste buds and he sucked harder, flexed his tongue to trap it against the roof of his mouth. Leo panted, the thick scent of his brother’s arousal making him churr blindly-- cinnamon, ash, whiskey .

“Damn, Fearless… ya’ even know what yer doin’?”

Raphael’s voice was deep and warbled in Leonardo’s ears--and maybe the olive-colored splotches on his otherwise red neck had something to do with it.

The over-buzzed turtle moaned gleefully, slurping up the saliva dribbling down the portion of the treat not in his mouth. Raphael huffed and shook his head.

Fuh…

He whined as the sopping drug was pulled from his maw, spit connecting the red “slug” to his tingling tongue. Disappointment pulled his shiny lips into a pout. He’d been having fun with that one! And it tasted so good !

With the leaf and other intoxications fading from his system, he tried his brain for an intelligible protest, but all it gave him was a zap of heat to his already excited cock and pulsing vulva. A pathetic whine tore from his throat and a bubbling, lust-driven churr followed.

Raph chuckled and slid his tongue over his front teeth hungrily. Leo couldn’t see it, but his irises were as swallowed by black as the Earth was six years ago.

“Ỹ̵̯̖̌ḛ̶̱̆͂́r̴̖̺̈́̀ ̷̭̪̝͈̩̆͘s̵͚͖̪̟͉͘͠o̴̜̱͔̫̽͐m̴̪͗͋ē̵̘̞͖͚͓t̶͍̩͂h̵̦͔͉̽̃̎ͅi̶͚̦͋ñ̸̪̈̑g̸̡̱̯̠͒̃̆͒ ̵̤͓̈̏̕͝ẹ̷͕̩̳̣̒̿l̷̬̯͙̊̈̑s̷̱̝̗̈́̐e̷͎̳̗̟̱̓̿̔͒̐ ̴͖̅͌͘w̷̲̮͈̘͕̾̽h̴̫̦͉͂̆̍͋e̵͓̳̩̜̠̋̍̊̉n̴̨̛̫͚̥ ̴̮̩͎̬̤̐͗̀̈́ỹ̵̭̩͈ê̵̟̈́̓͝r̷͎͈̎ ̴̜̳̂̈h̸̰̙̋̑i̶̝͗̈̄̓̓g̷̬̅̓̆͜h̷̢̜͓̾́͐̂͛ͅ,̴͎͕̪͚̓̈́ ̴̣̟͉͇̔y̴̡̝̔a̷̓͑̏́͐ͅ'̶̢̤̹̳̏̌̇̐ ̴̢͖̣͖͖̏̄͛̈́k̷̜̣̿̾̈́̚n̴̨͇̲̮̐̎̈̒̕o̸̡̖̟͕̊w̶͍̞̜̿̎̚͝ ̸̀̍͜t̸̮̳̾̇ḩ̴̪͈͖̎͑̽͆̂a̷̢̝̼͚̻͋͌͘͘t̵͓̫̪̹͒̄̎͝ͅ?”

Black kissed away at Leonardo’s vision until he was swaying, the off colors and happy shapes bubbling and melting away into nothingness that left him shaking and empty feeling.

 

[2]

The first thing Raphael registered when he woke up was the distinct scent of an unsatisfied female. The second thing he registered was that the pleasant aroma was Leo and that the other turtle was perched on the rock beside Raph’s head.

It was no wonder the sai wielder had awoken from what seemed to be a relatively short nap--Leo, ever the oblivious fool, had planted his wet tail right by Raph’s nose . He could already feel the ridges of his cock pulsing with need.

“Leo, get’cher damned tail out’a ma face. Yer soaked.”

As expected, the leader let out an undignified squeak, pitching forward and into the water he’d been swinging his legs in. The splash that resulted was welcome over Raphael’s body, cooling the heat that tugged at his gut and waking him fully. Raph bit back a laugh as Leonardo erupted from the water, spluttering and squawking angrily about almost having a heart attack.

Raphael only smirked in response.

 

[3]

The walk home from their cave was quiet and riddled with sexual tension. The elder of the two brothers had begun his monthly heat cycle, his tail twitching agitatedly as he fought to keep it pressed tight against his dripping sex.

Raph liked to believe that he would’ve been able to make some sort of conversation if he wasn’t stuttering on every other breath trying not to churr. The sticky, sweet-smelling wetness clinging to the inside of Leo’s thighs didn’t help but it was more so due to the hazy vision of his leader, higher than Mount Everest, sucking on his finger like a damn pornstar.

He wasn’t sure if such a thing actually happened, having been more than doped up himself, but it seemed like it had. Every time he closed his eyes, he saw it, bright green lips pulling at his thick index and tongue playing with it like some sort of candy.

It was for these reasons, and the aching hardness being ground raw against his own dampened slit, that the hot-head opted out of communicating this maybe-memory to his sibling. The fear of a reprimand, or worse, scaring the easily flustered turtle off, was present as well, though he’d never admit the selfish worry was a motivator. Their relationship was ever-changing and he was anxious to see how things played out.

 

[4]

Dinner was tense and quiet, a simplistic spread of several pizzas.

Despite Leonardo’s best attempts, he couldn’t catch his father’s eye, the rat seemingly refusing to meet his son’s worried blue gaze. It was nerve-wracking and made Leo question whether or not he and Raphael had been cautious enough in their drug use. Was something staying in his system longer than he thought? Had he been high this morning when his father had confronted him about his distracted and bizarre recent behavior? Was that what he’d seen when he looked into Leo’s eyes?

It might explain his constate state of dazedness--but didn’t that start before he began using? Leo couldn’t recall. At any rate, he figured the older man would bring it up if it was truly an issue. He decided to bring the subject up with Raphael tomorrow. The red-banded ninja would know what to do.

The leader was startled out of his thoughts by a light brush against his ankle. Confused, he swung a leg of his own, gently, and searched his family’s faces.

Raphael was seated across from him, head down with his expression hidden. He tilted his head up briefly, a quick flash of mirthful green setting the swordsman’s beak aflame. Was Raph playing footsies with him?!

He attempted to hide his bashfulness as anger, forcing himself to glare at his brother.

A wrapped foot brushed gingerly across his ankle again, the toes wriggling to tickle him The forest green limbs retreated under their owner’s chair. Azure eyes glared confusedly over the tabletop and Raphael quickly found himself lost in them.