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Let Me Feel You

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Street lights flashed across her face in bright red and yellow. She blinked her eyes against them, sighed and then pressed a close fist to her mouth.

What is this feeling as if I am suffocating myself?

“Ms Ackerman, you are looking quite pale. Are you sure you don’t want to rest before going to the meeting?”

Mikasa glanced up and caught her driver’s eye. He was a kind old man; strict, but nice. He was the only employee that actually cared about her wellbeing. So Mikasa considered his suggestion.

She sighed and waved his concern away. She had an urgent meeting with business associates. Might as well get it done while she could, so that she could return home as soon as possible.

Mikasa’s driver inclined his head in acknowledgement and then continued the drive through busy streets.

Mikasa fell into her thoughts once more, lights flashing over her face.

When they passed by a familiar bar, Mikasa suddenly straightened and lifted a hand for her driver to stop. He did, and he sent a questioning glance her way.

“Ms Ackerman?”

“George, take the night off. I’ll take a taxi home.”

She stepped out of the car quickly, ignoring the driver’s calling for her to wait and explain where she was going.

The streets were busy despite the hour. Mikasa inhaled the cool, fresh air and allowed her legs to guide her to the bar. A large, flashing sign greeted her as she stepped inside of the establishment, a hand going to her tie to pull it down a few inches—the thing had been suffocating her all day.

The place was as she remembered—loud, lights flashing, people dancing provocatively on the dance floor. And by the bar, where she had seen her before, was Annie.

The woman was blonde, with a prominent nose and icy blue eyes. Those eyes sent a shiver down Mikasa’s spine just by remembering them, and the black-haired beauty weaved through the crowd to the bar. She lifted a hand for the bartender and seated herself beside the blonde.

Annie hadn’t noticed her yet, or she was just ignoring her. She had a shimmering blue dress on with her hair up in a bun—like it always was. She sipped lightly on her Mojito, thigh partially exposed to the luminous blue lights surrounding the bar as she shifted in her seat, the dress riding up slightly.

Mikasa ordered what Annie was having and watched the woman from the corner of her eye. Annie was simply enjoying her drink, lazily circling her finger over the rim when she was not taking a sip. Multiple smudges surrounded the rim of the glass, a result of her dark lipstick. When she noticed this she left her glass alone to quickly reapply it, and it was only then that she gave Mikasa any sort of her attention.

A blonde eyebrow rose, eyes imploring and dark. Mikasa’s shivered shamelessly, swallowed, and decided that she loved it when Annie looked at her that way.

The blonde gave her suit-clad body a once over, huffed lightly and then put her lipstick back into her purse. She leaned forward again to down the last of her drink, and Mikasa felt like it was time for her to stop staring. She turned to her own drink and watched her own glowing form in the reflection.

Mikasa had met Annie a week before. She had been stressed after an awful day of meetings and yelling, and so she had decided to be daring and entered the first bar she could find. At first she had been bored and had developed a headache thanks to the loud music, but then she had seen her—a small blonde seated by the bar, drinking calmly and shooting her very luring looks. Her eyes had screamed a challenge, and Mikasa hadn’t even blinked before accepting. They had danced all night, Mikasa steadily growing more and more attracted. Not a word had been spoken other than their names. Mikasa had said more, attempting to get to know the solitary blonde.

“So do you come here often?” Mikasa asked. Annie simply turned, dancing against her front, turned away so that she was not expected to answer. When she turned around again Mikasa’s hands landed on her hips, and dark grey eyes bore down into her own. “Can I at least know your name?”

Annie smirked then, small and feisty. “Annie,” she uttered over the loud music, lips pressed to Mikasa’s ear. Mikasa had to bend down low to allow Annie to tell her.

When Mikasa straightened she smiled, hands gripping Annie more firmly. “That’s a beautiful name. I’m Mikasa.”

Annie had silenced her with a finger then, daring her not to speak another word. Mikasa was always one for dares.

Annie seemed just as quiet now. Mikasa glanced to her side and found the seat empty. A new song had just begun, and before she could allow the disappointment to roll over her, she felt warm breath against her neck and turned to find Annie beckoning for her. The blonde stepped away, finger curled towards her, and melted into the dancing crowd.

Mikasa followed like a lost puppy.

She found Annie in the centre of the dance floor and was almost immediately pulled in close. Annie gripped her tie, pulled her close, brushed her lips over her own and then turned, dancing against her. Mikasa felt her chest swell, her knees quiver, and her heart thud against her ribcage.

Mikasa ran her hands along Annie’s firm body, enjoying the warm and the softness. She pressed her cheek to Annie’s, revelling in the warmth. Annie turned then, face now close to Mikasa’s. She wrapped a hand around the back of Mikasa’s neck, pulling her down even close, and smiled playfully.

Mikasa couldn’t control her urges—not when her heart was thundering so loudly in her ears, blood pumping adrenalin and hormones through her system. She leaned in quickly, breath coming out in short gasps. But before she could taste Annie’s tantalizing lips, a finger pressed to hers and she halted in confusion.

Annie smirked. “No,” she said. She dropped her hand and continued dancing, lips ghosting over Mikasa’s jaw. Eventually she grew bored and ran a finger along Mikasa’s chest before she licked her lips, winked once and melted away into the crowd again.

Mikasa stood rigid, eyes trained on where she’d seen the blonde disappear. Oh, she was so hooked already.

XxX

Some days later Mikasa lay in her bed, partially asleep but mostly awake. She had the blonde on her mind—the memories of their encounters plagued her mind. She could not stop thinking about her, wanting her, wishing that she had been able to kiss her when she had tried.

Why was she so hung up on a stranger, after barely even being by her side?

She did not know the answer. All she knew was that she felt like Annie had touched her soul. She wanted Annie to touch more than that—wanted to touch Annie more than that, too. It was an all-consuming thought, and before Mikasa knew it she was dressing in her most fancy clothes and climbing into her car.

Annie was there, at the bar, sitting where she always sat. This time she noticed Mikasa first, and a smirk spread out on her lips.

Before Mikasa knew what was happening, they were dancing; bodies grinding together, ears barely even listening to the music. All Mikasa could register was the intoxicating feeling of Annie’s hands on her, now roaming where they had not before. The breath caught in her throat, and she followed Annie’s lead.

She pulled the blonde firmly against her and pressed her lips to her neck. Annie inhaled sharply, clearly not having expected the sudden touch. She groaned lightly and ran a hand down Mikasa’s back.

Mikasa finally pulled away and forced her lips to Annie’s. The blonde only resisted half-heartedly. Her hands pressed to Mikasa’s chest, clenched tightly as her lips moved with Mikasa’s.

Eventually Annie pulled away, smiled and said, “Slow down.” She took Mikasa’s hand, still smiling, and pulled her to the bar. “Not right now, okay? Let’s have something to drink.”

Not right now? Mikasa thought to herself. What does she mean? She’s been teasing me every time we dance.

But Mikasa followed and they ordered their drinks, taking them to a private booth separate from the noise of the club and filled with dark, blue light. It did not ease the adrenalin from Mikasa’s body, and her nostrils continued to flare even after they had taken a seat and Annie pressed against her side.

They sat there and remained silent. Mikasa stared down into her drink, not wanting to drink anything, but wanting to be with Annie for as long as she could. The blonde obviously felt the opposite, since she was quickly downing her drink and then she took Mikasa’s without asking.

“Mikasa,” Annie eventually uttered. She pressed a hand to her knee. “Why do you come here?”

Mikasa swallowed thickly, mind racing. This was the first time Annie had ever spoken to her—or asked a question. What was she supposed to say without looking like a stalker creep? She only came back here because of Annie, but she couldn’t really tell her that.

“I, um,” Mikasa began. She pulled her tie loose. “I try to wind down after a long day.”

Annie suddenly climbed onto her lap, pushing Mikasa’s back against the seat. She wrapped her arms around her neck, eyes flashing. “Oh?” she leaned in close, almost brushing their lips. “And it’s not because of me?”

Mikasa swore that Annie could hear the loud thundering of her heart. Was this her chance? Was Annie flirting with her? There was a not so subtle fire in her eyes, so Mikasa felt encouraged and cleared her throat before taking this chance.

“It could be,” she said.

“I think it is,” Annie responded with a smirk. She started moving her body, swaying lightly to the music. “This is my favourite song,” she supplied. It was a saucy song, with a hard beat and heated lyrics. Mikasa’s face flushed as she felt Annie’s body moving against her own.

“Why do you come here?” Mikasa tried cautiously.

Annie didn’t pause. She closed her eyes, bit into her lip and hummed lightly. “Let’s dance again,” she said heatedly. Her eyes snapped open, blue irises like icy fire. Mikasa shivered at the sight of them and nodded dumbly, allowing Annie to pull her back out onto the dance floor.

Even after Annie touched her teasingly, ghosted her lips over her skin, she would not allow Mikasa to touch her—or talk. Whenever Mikasa attempted to ask something, she would turn around or press a finger to her lips. Mikasa grew frustrated, but she enjoyed the feel of Annie dancing against her, of Annie’s hands pressed to her chest or her arms wrapped around her neck. She enjoyed the way Annie’s eyes stabbed right through her, how Annie’s blonde eyebrow would rise whenever she was dissatisfied with Mikasa’s disobedience.

Mikasa suddenly felt like she was being toyed with, but under Annie’s daring gaze, she could not find it within herself to care.

XxX

“I don’t want to pay,” Annie said levelly. She met Mikasa’s gaze and did not waver, but lifted an eyebrow and tapped the empty glass sitting on the bar counter.

Mikasa smiled lightly, rolled her eyes and then acquiesced. “Fine,” she said.

It had been a month and some days after they had spoken properly for the first time. Since then Annie had barely opened up, but Mikasa had, and Annie hadn’t minded listening. Mikasa frequented the bar now, often being conned into paying for Annie’s many drinks before being pulled out onto the dance floor.

They shared many inappropriate touches, but only at Annie’s command. The tiny blonde wouldn’t allow Mikasa the initiative, and if Mikasa stepped out of the line their night of fun was over. If things went too far, Annie would whisper, “No” and head off of the dance floor to order a new drink. Mikasa would follow her, and they would talk. Sometimes Annie would forgive her quickly and climb on her lap again, gazes searing into each other. Sometimes they would even kiss, and it was in those moments that Annie wavered and begged Mikasa to take her home, but would change her mind at the last minute.

Mikasa still felt like it was a silly game to Annie, but she could not stop her infatuation. When away she would dream of Annie in the night, think of Annie in the day. It was like the little blonde followed her everywhere, and the only way to relieve herself of her emotional and sexual frustration was to visit the bar, to see Annie and to merely touch her glistening skin—when she was allowed to.

“You like being a diva, Annie,” Mikasa said with a smile. This time it was she that raised an eyebrow. Annie copied the motion.

“Why not?” Annie asked. She pulled on Mikasa’s tie to bring her closer. “When you’re so willing?” She chuckled lightly, and Mikasa’s heart pounded.

“Yet you still won’t come home with me.”

Annie frowned and leaned in to kiss her, though roughly. “Let’s sit somewhere and drink. I’m tired.” She took her drink, flashed a look over her shoulder and disappeared. Mikasa watched her with a smouldering gaze, and then she sized and paid the tab before following.

She found Annie seated amongst strangers in the quietest part of the club, sipping lazily on her drink. The blonde had a pale leg crossed over the other, thighs bared for Mikasa to see.

“You’re fond of having me run after you,” Mikasa said with a frown. She sat down beside the blonde and was surprised when Annie pressed heavily to her side and took a hold of her hand.

“I’m grossly obsessed with you,” Annie admitted. She played with Mikasa’s hand and then grew bored, intertwining their fingers. “You smell really nice.”

Mikasa’s head began to swim. “Your hand is so small.” It popped out before she could stop it, and she quickly pressed a hand to her mouth as if the action would stop her words from reaching Annie’s ears. It didn’t, but Annie wasn’t offended.

The blonde laughed instead. It wasn’t loud, but largely amused. Mikasa was mesmerized by the sound. Very quickly she realized that she was falling deeper and deeper in love with this blonde stranger, and she desired to get to know every inch of her.

“You’re cute,” Annie said. Her eyelids drooped and she leaned into Mikasa, cheek rubbing against her shoulder.

As it always did, Mikasa’s heart jumped into her throat. Annie was always cold and unapproachable, but now she seemed to be opening up, just a little.

Annie seemed to realize this, so she quickly straightened and pushed a lock of hair behind her ear. Mikasa watched her do it, entranced.

Mikasa managed to sneak a good few personal questions in. Annie would answer if she felt like it, and if not she would avert the attention back to Mikasa, or outright ignore the question.

By midnight Mikasa had Annie laughing, and she felt euphoric. Many drinks had passed their lips, as well as many words. They had kissed a few times, more than usual, and Mikasa truly felt like she was definitely falling in love. A large part of her feared that Annie was only just playing with her, because everything Annie did and said hinted towards it, but Mikasa did not want to believe the possibility—especially not when she watched how Annie’s head tilted back when she laughed, or when their hands touched, Annie’s so much smaller.

Mikasa wanted to ravish Annie right then and there, but she also wanted to merely hold her—press her lips to her throat, run a hand through her hair, maybe whisper words of love.

Before Mikasa could act on any of her impulses, Annie’s phone rang. Annie usually ignored her phone calls, but this once she answered it. Mikasa watched as Annie’s smile turned strained and she quickly hurried around the corner to answer it.

Mikasa grew concerned, but knew that she was in no place to follow and attempt to comfort her. However, after a minute of patiently waiting Mikasa heard the sound of Annie’s raised voice, and decided to leave her drink and find the blonde—she had never heard Annie’s voice raise more than a level tone.

Just as she rounded the corner Annie’s fist landed against the wall, her face contorted in many different expressions.

“It’s over, I can’t take it anymore!” she yelled, blue eyes lit on fire.

Mikasa’s chest tightened painfully. This was it—she knew in an instant that whoever Annie was speaking to, it was her real lover. No one else would afford that much emotion, be it negative or not. Mikasa had been right all along—Annie was merely playing with her. This was all just a game.

Mikasa turned and attempted to walk away nonchalantly and like her heart wasn’t breaking, but Annie suddenly grabbed her and pressed her to the wall.

“Hold on,” Annie begged, breathless. “You heard that, didn’t you?”

Mikasa turned her head, not able to meet the blonde’s eyes. What could she say? She’d willingly put herself in the blonde’s claws.

“I know you heard,” Annie whispered. She pulled Mikasa down by her tie and kissed her urgently, hands pressed to Mikasa’s cheeks. “Please,” she begged, “let me make you forget it all.”

Mikasa’s body lit on fire. Her chest hurt, but her body burnt. She wrapped her arms around Annie and whimpered lightly as she lifted the blonde in her arms, kissing her with all the emotion she had not been allowed to show until now.

Anne tugged on her clothes, breaths coming out as gasps. She did not even care that her feet had been lifted from the floor. Her arms tightened around Mikasa, and after biting her lip while she pulled away, she gasped out a single sentence. “Take me home?” she asked in a scared whisper.

Mikasa stared into her eyes for a long moment, chest heaving. She nodded once, set Annie down onto her feet and then pulled her to the club doors. This time Annie had no choice, and her heart thudded in fear.

They climbed into Mikasa’s sleek, black car, and melted in the night.