Margo and Eliot were going over a site talking about which places in the city were having major parties, who would be going and all the like. They were on a quest to get tickets to the Met Gala without using magic. So when they spotted that there would be a huge party for a Met Board member’s birthday they figured it was a perfect chance to get in and meet everyone.
So they were researching the board members when Quentin saw them.
“Why are you guys staring at a picture of Julia’s mom?”
“Her mom is Elizabeth Van Horton?” Margo seemed surprised. Sure she had been regularly sleeping with Julia like five nights a week but they weren’t dating.
“Yeah, she went back to her maiden name after the divorce.” Quentin just looked at them confused. “Has Julia told you anything about her family?”
“Just about Mackenzie.”
“Talk to her. Tell her whatever it is you’re trying to do, she might be able to help.” Quentin left them alone after that.
“Bambi, you need to go fuck her so good she forgets her name.”
“Tell everyone to stay away from below my room, no promises it won’t be a danger zone.”
Margo found Julia on the bed reading (God she was such a nerd) she had spent the night before with Margo and was enjoying a lazy day between assignments.
“Hey, no plans with Eliot?”
“We had plans but they’re on hold.” Margo sat on the bed next to her hand going to Julia’s knee.
“Missed me that much huh?”
“Quentin told us something.” This caused Julia to close her book completely.
“What did Q say?”
“El and I have been having a contest, between us who can get tickets to the Met Gala without using magic first. I found out that this weekend there is a Met Board member’s party.”
“And Q told you that it was my mom.” Julia wasn’t sure how she felt about this.
“Yeah. I can’t promise you Gala tickets though.”
“I never asked you.”
“I guess Q never mentioned the whole I’m a constant disappointment and failure thing either?”
“How you could be either of those I can never understand. You’re doing spells that I haven’t had classes for.”
“If I bring you to the party promise to help me drive my mom insane?”
“I promise to fuck you in each and every bathroom and somewhat secluded spot in the party.” Margo was straddling her now lips centimetres apart.
“I do want you to meet Mack. She’s pretty great.”
“I’m picking out our outfits, you are not embarrassing me.”
“I already have my outfit. Mom has it waiting for me to pick up at Chanel. She wouldn’t risk any chance of embarrassment. At these events, Mack and I show up, make very small polite pleasantries, only have one drink each and just stand there looking pretty.”
“Oh, I really want to fuck you at this party now.”
The party itself was louder than Margo would figure for a 55th birthday, but waiters with drink trays were everywhere. Julia grabbed a drink from the closest tray.
“Mingle first or do you want to go meet the Beast?” Before Margo could answer they were interrupted by a blonde woman a few inches taller than Julia.
“Jules thank fuck I was starting to worry you were going to claim to be too busy at school.”
“It wouldn’t have been a claim, I am busy with school.” Julia sighed before wrapping her arms around the woman’s neck in a tight hug and kissed her cheek.
“Mack, this is Margo, Margo my sister Mackenzie.”
“So I finally get to meet the famous Margo.” Mackenzie kissing Margo on the cheek.
Margo smirked over the smaller brunette.
“Oh yeah, she never shuts up about you.” Mack smirked herself. “Oh Jules, mom said as soon as you came she wanted to talk to you. Don’t worry I’ll keep Margo company.”
“She tell you what she wants me for?”
“My guess is she’s pissed that you blew off Yale.”
“Great. If I’m not back in five minutes save me.” Julia downed her drink before switching it out for a new one on a passing tray.
Margo had chatted with Mack all while glancing over to where Julia looked like she was closer and closer to losing her mind.
“Did Julia tell you about the time she was grounded for four months when she was nine?”
“No what did she do?”
“Her and Quentin had drawn a map of Fillory on the bottom of the kitchen table. Mom was livid, Dad thought it was sweet...oh fuck.” Mack frowned seeing Julia storm past their mom and onto the terrace. “Excuse me.”
Margo figured it was best to give the sisters a few moments alone. She would have herself a drink, see if there was anyone important to talk with.
So when she overheard Elizabeth talk to some woman who clearly didn’t think there was such a thing as too much self-tanner or too much plastic surgery she decided a little eavesdropping did no harm.
“Honestly it seems like she is just trying to hurt me. I swear she is a hundred percent her father. Johnston is going to have his hands full keeping an eye on her.” Elizabeth Van Horton the classiest and best example of a boss bitch that Margo had ever seen. She was clearly discussing Julia which made Margo a bit conflicted because while yes that is one would talk about plebs or the Todds of the world, this woman was putting Julia, her not girlfriend, in the same category as Todd.
“Well it’s for the best, if she is going down that path you need to keep ahead of it. I know Barry will happily grant you the POA.” The Orange Facelift spoke.
“Don’t worry it’s already drawn up just waiting on him to sign it. I warned Mackenzie, she insisted that it was a good idea to let Julia and her little friend live together for Columbia that she was going to be held responsible when it backfired. I mean who thinks going to Yale for Philosophy is a good idea? It’s like he planned to have Julia support him. Not like James, now he was someone I greatly approved of.”
“Well James’ family have that lovely place in Cape.”
“I told her she has until a month before the new semester starts to get her ass to Yale or she’s going to be cut off. See how easy she finds it when I’m not picking up the bills.”
Margo decided enough was enough fuck this, she was going to check on Julia first and then she would tell this woman where to go thinking she could buy off Julia.
Margo found Julia on the balcony leaning over the rail cig in one hand and Mackenzie next to her.
“Hey. So no offence but your mother is a bitch, heard her talking to this hideous woman who has had five too many facelifts.”
“Yeah. That is one of her famous asskissers.” Mackenzie pointed out.
“So who’s Johnson because apparently he is going to have his hands full keeping an eye on you Jules.”
“Mom’s P.I. she mostly uses him to go through our stuff. Quentin came home once to find him taking pictures of our apartment.”
“What the fuck?”
“Yeah, when Quentin asked what the fuck he was did Johnston just shrugged and said he had permission from the owner and since we weren’t renters he only needed permission from her. If we could come close to affording a livable place we would have, but with the pressure of school and the fact that Mom never spends any time in the apartment she’s paying for.” Julia just sighed. “I didn’t think it would be too bad.”
“Biggest understatement of the year.” Mackenzie muttered. “So worst case, I’ll buy a storage unit and you and Quentin can move all your stuff there so you can finish Grad school where you want.”
“Mom said if I don’t go to Yale she’s cutting me off.”
“We’ll figure something out.” Margo wasn’t going to let some bitch try and destroy Julia’s life.
“I don’t give a fuck if she cuts me off. She can’t fucking buy me.”
“But would she try and buy me?” Margo asked with a smirk.
“Why would she try and buy you?” Julia had finished her smoke and was already on a new one, now slightly annoyed at the fact that just because her sister was with them she had to go back to using a lighter, a stupid lighter that kept going out because of stupid wind.
“Because you are going to tell Mackenzie all about how the only reason you picked the school you did is because you met me. You gave up Yale because you’re madly in love with me.”
“So she’ll think I’m not only a failure but a foolish failure?”
“I mean she said you are one hundred percent your father so is a foolish failure worse?”
“There is no one Mom has a worse opinion of compared to Daddy.” Mackenzie pointed out.
“She does hate Daddy.”
Margo bit her lip to stop herself from commenting on how two grown-ass women should not be referring to their father as Daddy. The term was now expressly purely sexual.
“Are you fine with pretending to break up with Julia for a large sum of money?” Mackenzie asked.
“We aren’t dating.” Julia interjected it was so clear, she knew the rules, Eliot and Margo never had relationships.
“I’d rather do it for tickets to the Met Gala.”
“I’ll drop the hints. Mom needs to think everything is her idea. I’ll go talk to her, you two stay here by the window and look in love.”
Once Mackenzie was back inside Julia leaned her head on Margo’s shoulder.
“Get why I didn’t tell you about my mom?”
“I mean honestly if she was being a bitch to someone else, someone I didn’t like, I would be her number one fan. But since I have an invested interest in someone not destroying your happiness-”
“Because if I’m happy the sex is better?”
“What else would it be? Feelings?” Margo rolled her eyes. “If it wasn’t you that she was trying to make miserable I would be asking to be her protege. But I like it when you’re happy.”
“I like it when you’re happy too. I know you’re always trying to figure out how to be a bigger bitch.”
“I am.” Margo nodded. “The only family I have that you need to worry about if they like you or not is Eliot.”
“Eliot hates me.”
“It isn’t personal. El and I are just very unhealthily co-dependent. When someone else is in our lives, we act like jealous toddlers. When his flavor of the week turned into a flavor of the month I made a portal to Sadi Arabia and shoved him in it.”
“What happened to him?”
“I don’t know. Eliot kind of forgot about him. I guess he’s dead. I hope he is.”
“So Eliot might try and kill me?”
“If he doesn’t I will be very hurt.”
Julia just smiled wrapping her arms around Margo’s neck getting up on her tippy toes to kiss her.
“I will watch my back around Eliot. Quentin does get a bit jealous too.”
“Please I am more threatened by a fly. He always looks like he’s been recently beaten up by small children.”
“That’s-I mean it is fair.” Julia knew of five times when an adult Quentin was beaten up by children under ten. They were either Fillory or Star Wars related. “They’re coming over here. Are you sure you want to actually meet her because off the top of my head of things I’d rather do than talk to my mother is jump over this railing and plummet to my death.”
“Do you want to see if she really does put her plan for your life ahead of your own happiness?”
“I know she does. I have no doubt she will try and buy you. I think you shouldn’t settle for two gala tickets.”
“Think she’d sign over your place?”
“I think she would rather burn it to the ground.”
“Julia, Mackenzie told me you wanted to introduce me to someone?” Elizabeth Van Horton looked at her youngest like Margo had seen Eliot look at Todd. When Margo wrapped an arm around Julia’s waist she told herself it was to sell the idea that Julia picked her grad school based on Margo, her girlfriend, and not because she wanted to make Julia feel safer and comfortable, she wanted to make sure Julia felt loved and wanted.
“Yes, this is Margo Hanson, my girlfriend. Margo my mother Elizabeth Van Horton.” Julia gave the introduction watching them shake hands.
“Pleasure to meet you.”
“Pleasure is all mine, you have quite the amazing daughter here.” Margo knew how to schmooze.
“She’d be more amazing if she continued her Ivy League education.”
“Nice Mom, very subtle.” Julia rolled her eyes.
“It’s true, I mean you say you went to Yale Business School, that means something.” Margo agreed with Elizabeth.
“Yeah and you’d be in upstate New York while I am in New Haven, sounds like hell.” Julia smiled at Margo.
“We could make it work. What’s a few years when we have a life time?”
“Jules, how about we go get everyone new drinks and let Mom grill Margo like we know she wants to.” Mackenzie tried.
“Okay. Be back soon.” Julia gave Margo a kiss on the cheek. “I love you.”
“I love you too.” Margo answered easily enough.
Mackenzie had linked her arm through Julia’s as she pulled her though the party crowd.
“Wow you two are great at this whole sickening sweet love-struck couple. Hard to believe you’re just fooling around.”
“Shut up we’re just friends having fun.”
“You look at her like the sun rises and falls at her command.”
“I do not.”
“She looks at you that way too.”
“No she doesn’t.”
Margo was going over the basic line of questioning with Elizabeth. Where did she go to Undergrad? UCLA. What did she major in? Theatre. GPA? 4.0. Plans after Grad School? End goal was CEO.
“Look I’m going to be honest with you, you seem lovely and I am sure that you will be able to achieve your goals. However, Julia already has everything planned out. Job offers waiting for her as soon as she finished her masters with Yale.”
“Only Julia doesn’t want to go to Yale.”
“Because of you. Now I am not saying this is your fault, it isn’t. This is Julia’s fault. I don’t know if you have noticed but Julia is not the most stable. She gets it from her father, very troubled man. So in order for Julia to get back on track she needs to go to Yale.”
“Let’s just cut to the chase shall we?”
“What will it take for you to leave Julia?”
“Are you offering to bribe me to break up with your daughter?”
“That depends, would you accept it?”
“You’re on the board of the Met. Julia told me about it.”
“I hear the Gala is fabulous.”
“Two tickets for the next five years.”
“Events like the Gala requires some beautiful outfits.”
“I can connect you to some designers for the event.”
“Deal.” Margo held out her hand and Elizabeth shook it.
“So Julia doesn’t get suspicious wait two weeks before you break up with her. Once that’s done I will have my assistant email you with the details. ”
“It’s a plan.” Margo gave her sweet smile to the woman while thinking of how easy she could kill her at that moment. How many other times did she meddle with Julia’s life to keep her on some path?
“The finest red at the bar.” Julia and Mackenzie were back with the drinks and Julia passed Margo hers.
“Thank you Darling.” Margo smiled her arm going back around Julia’s waist.
“Well Mom are you happy with the answers?”
“She certainly knows how to get ahead in life.” Elizabeth smirked.
A few more lines and questions and Elizabeth was gone to talk with her other guests.
As soon as the door closed behind her Julia looked at Margo.
“Two tickets and custom designer outfits for the Gala for the next five years.” Margo explained.
“And you are single in two weeks.”
“She brought it up?”
“Yeah, she made the offer.”
“Okay well in two weeks I call Mack all upset and heartbroken because you broke up with me out of the blue.”
“I then call Mom asking her to reconsider cutting you off so you have the apartment to go and get away from school and Margo.”
“Great plan.” Julia muttered downing her glass of wine. “Well this has been great. I think we should call it a night. I’ll call you tomorrow Mack.”
“Good, send Quentin my love.” Mackenzie gave Julia a tight hug. “I love you.”
“Love you too.”
“It was great to finally meet you Margo.”
Once the couple were back to being alone outside Julia broke the silence.
“I remember a promise to fuck me in each and every bathroom and somewhat secluded spot in the party.”
“True.” Margo did a simple tut and the overhead light dimmed shroading them in shadows. “Here a good place to start?”
The next afternoon when Julia and Margo stumbled into the cottage laughing and falling over each other Quentin smiled. He has never seen Julia so happy after having to spend time with her mom.
“How was the party?”
“Got some hard core proof that Mom is the biggest bitch in the world.” Julia laughed.
“Eliot! Eliot get down here and bow to your superior!” Margo yelled. “Q your bedroom is so nerdy and I still refuse to believe you got someone to touch your nerd dick.”
“You saw my bedroom?”
“We went to the apartment after the party.” Julia pointed out.
“Found your fleshlight.”
“My fleshlight?” Quentin was six different shades of red.
“I did not condone the snooping.” Julia pointed out.
“She was completely out of it, we hit a club after the party and found a lot of party favors.”
“Q there was coke. I did coke! I liked it!”
While Quentin and Julia were not the boring ones at a party, they were not the hard core partiers that Margo and Eliot were. They had smoked weed, they had taken ecstasy a couple of times but nothing too hard or heavy. Julia had taken adderall and speed. Quentin stayed away from it because of how it mixed with his antidepressants.
“Coke? You have coke?” Eliot asked appearing at the top of the stairs.
“We had coke.” Julia pointed out.
“We have other fun things and yes I will share. But first Julia you want to tell Eliot about our sucess last night?”
“My mom promised Margo tickets to the Gala for the next five years and a connection to a designer if she dumps me.”
“What the fuck?” Quentin knew about how insane Julia’s mother could be. He remembered the sumers filled with PSATs and how since he first knew Julia her whole life was planned out down to the minute to ensure she never strayed from the path that was planned for her.
“Five years? Just for dumping the nerd? The nerd you aren’t even dating.”
“Well I couldn’t very well tell my mom that we’re just friends who keep banging.”
“What’s the catch?” Quentin knew that simply dumping Julia wouldn’t be enough reason.
“We made her believe that the only reason I went to Breakbills was because I met Margo and found out she went there.”
“This is still about you not going to Yale?” Quentin questioned.
“Yeah. If I don’t sign up for next semester with Yale, I am getting cut off and we lose our apartment.”
“I’ll call my dad and see if we can move some stuff to his garage. The bigger things we can just get a storage unit...figure out some way to pay for it.”
“All this shit because your mom wants you to go to Yale?”
“She has my whole life planned out.”
“Didn’t plan for magic.” Margo muttered. “So Eliot, I won.”
“You won.” Eliot admitted. “I take it the second ticket is for me?”
“Well it sure as fuck aint for Julia.”
Margo and Eliot went upstairs to plan everything out. Julia just sat down on the couch next to Quentin putting her feet in his lap.
“So your mom literally offered a bribe to break up your relationship.”
“Only when her threats weren’t working. She was finally respecting the fact I didn’t want to live the life she had planned.”
“Respecting the fact and then using other people in your life to try and control you?”
“She has a POA drawn up just waiting for a signature.”
“She tell you that?”
“Nope, Margo overheard. She is also getting Johnson to follow me.”
“But that’s impossible with the wards.”
“Thank God. I think if after Margo dumps me and I still won’t go to Yale she’s getting that POA signed and shoving me where she shoved Daddy.”
“We’ll figure it out if it comes to it.” Quentin promised.