I could follow you to the beginning
Just to relive the start
Maybe then we'll remember to slow down
At all of our favorite parts
Rewind > Pause > Play
They had been fighting all day, stupid little fights that escalated into several major shouting matches which in turn nearly resulted in the end of their relationship. The months prior to this, Aomine thinks, should have been a warning of what was to come.
He and Kagami have been together for a while now, since their last year of high school and Aomine loves him, he really does.
But being an adult is hard on a relationship like theirs. He's grown, and so has Kagami and they both have time consuming careers. At first, it worked out because when they went for so long without seeing each other, the time spent together was appreciated, like reigniting the flame anew each time. The sex had been amazing, blown out and mind numbing and it made everything lost all worth it.
But tension weighed heavily after a while; suspicions aroused, jealousy reared and just the strain of their jobs created a much less desirable relationship between them.
But Aomine loves Kagami, he really does.
That's why today, when their argument had gotten so bad that Kagami packed a gym bag and was ready to high tail it out of his life for good, Aomine made a promise. Several promises.
He promised Kagami to be honest and faithful, that he'd stop drinking so much - which had become a bad habit that went with his job; it wasn't possible for Aomine to remain sober most days after the things he'd see. Being an officer in the heart of Tokyo - a homicide detective and not just a beat cop - he bore witness to many hellish and macabre scenes that often haunted his sleep, which also lead to troubling insomnia.
Aomine knew he shouldn't blame his career for his actions, and his career had nothing to do with his almost-just-that-one-time slip up at being unfaithful. Kagami was unbelievably patient and forgiving and it was Aomine that accused him of doing the things he himself had been guilty of.
But Aomine loves Kagami.
There's nothing in this world that would ever make Aomine want to be with anyone other than him. He's just stupid, fucks shit up sometimes; has to remind himself that it's not all about him anymore. That he loves someone else; someone who's never let him down.
And now he can't even remember the promises he had made, can't remember what that argument had been over. It didn't matter now, because Aomine had gone and fucked up again. He wasn't good at remembering, he was selfish at times but who the hell wasn't?
"Aomine," Kagami says with a heavy sigh. "Give me the keys, you're drunk."
Kagami isn't selfish. He's exactly the opposite.
Aomine leans on the hood of their car and sneers. "Hey idiot... Do I fucking look drunk?"
Kagami rolls his eyes, shooting out his hand, palm up expectantly. "Listen, you asshole... It doesn't matter if you look drunk, you are drunk. The law is the law - "
Aomine digs the keys out of his too-thin-for-winter leather jacket. He regretted choosing fashion over freezing now. "Don't tell me about the law, mother fucker. I'm a cop," Aomine slurs.
"- and you've had too much to drink. Now give me the keys so we can go home. I'm fucking freezing my ass off here." Kagami's eyes narrow as puffs of heated air blow through his flared nostrils. He looks like an animated dragon.
What a fuckin' buzzkill. Kagami's face isn't funny anymore when Aomine stirs in the pregnant silence, letting the other's words sink in. He lets out a long sigh instead of laughter. Kagami is right, he's had too much to drink and maybe he isn't falling down drunk yet but he really shouldn't be driving, especially while the roads were slippery. But fuck does he ever hate being wrong and being told what to do.
"Hey. Are you listening? You're a cop, you say? Aren't you supposed to be setting an example, upholding the law and not trying to break it? " Kagami asks, raising one of his unique brows. "Dude, imagine the scandal. Your stupid ass would end up behind bars, forget ever bein' a cop again. Your image would be toast. My image would be ruined."
True, he was a detective and the publicity from that stunt would be bad, but it'd probably be worse for Kagami. He had been scouted into the NBA and stayed in Los Angeles when he had games and practice and being caught in the car with another man who was drunk might lead to too much speculation. It wasn't like they had to hide their relationship from the media, it was just because Kagami's stupid public relations agent said that it would be best if they didn't 'parade their lifestyle choice for the whole world to see.' He didn't care if the whole world fucking saw them together, he loved all of Kagami; especially when he was a sexy, vicious beast in bed. He is a kind and selfless lover; hilariously amusing and adorably brainless sometimes. Kagami is his rival, his equal, his lover and his best friend. If anyone had asked him he'd say Kagami was perfectly perfect.
"Aomine... The keys, dammit. Why do you have to get like this and start acting like a stubborn brat?"
Aomine frowns. Why'd Kagami have to go and ruin all of the fun? He was so serious and angry, though he put on his best game face in front of Tetsu and Satsuki because it was their anniversary dinner tonight and despite their fight earlier on in the day, Kagami and Aomine still had to keep up appearances.
The rest of their friends had already left, and Aomine hadn't wanted to leave but Kagami forced him to, despite Satsuki's offer to stay in their guest room. This had pissed Aomine off to begin with, and then it was utterly embarrassing to be dragged out of Tetsu and Satsuki's swanky, downtown condo. But on the way down, in the elevator, Kagami had let Aomine kiss him and he kissed Aomine back and Aomine had thought everything was okay now. The argument from earlier when Kagami almost left him, the embarrassment in Satsuki's apartment in front of them; all that had been forgiven the second Kagami slipped his tongue through Aomine's parted lips and he melted away like a fat kid's ice cream in the searing July heat.
Aomine loves him. He doesn't want Kagami to be mad and he doesn't want to be miserable because Kagami is pissed off with him. He just wants to go home, fuck or get fucked - it really didn't matter at this point - and go to sleep.
"Daiki..." Kagami warns, his lips twisted in a tight frown of disapproval.
"Shut up. Shut up," he groans. "Take the keys, asshole."
Kagami smiles a really smug smile at him. It kinda pisses him off. Aomine's not really a mean drunk, he just doesn't like being told what to do or that he's incapable of doing something. And least of all, he doesn't like to lose, no matter what it is. Especially not to Bakagami. Stupid Bakagami.
He fakes a pass and then tosses the keys over Kagami's shoulder and they land somewhere in the powdery snow. Aomine smirks at the victory while Kagami scowls.
So much for not pissing him off...
Kagami glares at him. "You're a bastard, you know that? If I can't find them, I'm going back inside Kuroko's apartment and he and Momoi will have no problem leaving your drunk ass out here to freeze to death. " He growls while he trudges through the snow to find the car keys.
"Tetsu and Satsuki wouldn't do that, they were my friends first," Aomine taunts as he stumbles around their car to the passenger seat. "They love me... And so do you."
By the looks of it, Kagami has successfully managed to find the car keys and is making his way back over to the car. He stops at the driver's side and narrows his eyes. "I don't really love you right now."
Aomine laughs and it almost sounds bitter but he knows that Kagami loves him, he's just mad.
Kagami unlocks the doors. "What?"
"Are you gonna let me do you when we get home?"
Kagami doesn't answer him and ducks into the driver's seat of the car. Aomine follows and watches patiently as he starts up the car. A blast of cool then hot air filters through the vents and Aomine sticks his hands on top of them in an attempt to thaw out his frozen fingers.
Kagami puts the car in gear and pulls out of the parking lot of Tetsu and Satsuki's apartment. He still hasn't responded to Aomine's question and Aomine doesn't like to be ignored.
The red head next to him is tight lipped and focused and doesn't glance once in his direction. The street lights cascade an orange glow that pools into the car each time they pass one.
"Kagami. Pull over."
Kagami's eyes shift off the road and give Aomine a weary sidelong glance. "Are you gonna throw up?"
Aomine hadn't thought about that, but now that Kagami mentioned it, he'll run with that. He really just wants Kagami to give him a little attention.
He nods slowly and Kagami pulls over to the side of a deserted road and unlocks the door.
"Don't puke in the car, idiot."
"Not gonna," states Aomine childishly. He unbuckles his seat belt and pouts. He knows that Kagami hates babysitting him when he gets like this, but to be honest, Aomine loves the attention. He hadn't meant to get this drunk at Satsuki's dinner party, but he couldn't help himself. Especially since Kagami had stopped drinking after his first beer, while Aomine had already been on his third or fourth but everyone speed to be having such a good time. It's been a while since Aomine has had this much fun and he was glad to have shared the night with his friends. But he would take one of Kagami's pure and genuine smiles over any of all that if he could right now. One of the things Aomine hated most was to see the look of disdain and disappointment marring that beautiful face of his.
"I want to kiss you, Bakagami."
"Eh? Are you retarded or something? Like he'll I'm gonna let you throw up in my mouth," Kagami says curtly.
"I promise I ain't gonna do that," Aomine slurs with a permanent smirk.
"Heh... You promise a lot of things, Daiki." Kagami's tone is cut throat, haughty. It kind of pisses Aomine off so he glares at him and waits for Kagami to elaborate but he doesn't.
Kagami sits with his hands on the wheel, white knuckled and bloodless, narrow eyed and brooding. He doesn't look at Aomine, doesn't speak to Aomine and Aomine might feel just a tiny, minuscule pang of guilt. Right where his heart is. But Kagami doesn't have to be so uptight about the whole thing, they had been having a good time with each other before they left. Right? Aomine doesn't really remember anything other than Kagami getting mad that he wanted to stay and dragging him out of the apartment. They even made out in the elevator before making their way out to the parking lot. So something had to have happened in the time they left the building to now. The only thing Aomine could think of was when he threw the keys. Kagami shouldn't... couldn't still be mad at that? Right? The thought made Aomine laugh out loud. Kagami was such a fucking cry baby.
"What are you laughing at, asshole?" Kagami snarls, his ivory cheeks flushed vermilion from the cold.
"You," Aomine laughs.
"Are you gonna throw up or not? Fucking bastard. Put on your fucking seat belt. We're going home."
"Why didn't we just stay at the apartment?" Aomine pouts. "Then we could have avoided this whole you getting mad at me for nothin' argument."
"Because... Because I just wanted to spend some time alone with you, you stupid bastard!" Kagami flushes a deeper shade of red and Aomine really, really wants to kiss him now.
"But I am never ever letting you get drunk again. I can't stand you right now," Kagami grinds out through clenched teeth.
Aomine stops laughing and frowns. It definitely pisses Aomine off that Kagami is being so pissy but the alcohol has him in light spirits and he doesn't have the energy to be mad.
He reaches out a hand and brushes Kagami's cheek with the back of it. "Don't be mad, Tai."
Kagami jerks away from the touch and averts his eyes. He lets out a long winded sigh before he speaks.
"Look, I'm not mad... I just wish you'd be a little more responsible at times. Why did you even have to get like this? No one else was drinking like they were at a fucking college frat party. Only you. All you do lately is drink until you're piss ass fucking drunk. I feel like I don't even know who you are anymore. You're ruining this relationship... You're really an idiot, Aomine."
The words cut a little deeper than they should have. He's had enough of Kagami's whining tonight and nagging tonight. There's only so many times he could apologize in his own way. When was Kagami going to give it up?
"I need to be more responsible? I'm an officer of the law for fuck sakes. I'm the more capable and responsible person in this relationship, I take care of you. I'm a fuckin' man, a human. I'm allowed to have a few fuckin' beers and get a little drunk. I don't know what your fuckin' problem is, asshole, but I really fuckin' hate your attitude right now."
Aomine is surprised with just how nasty he sounds. He doesn't intend for it to come out that way but when push comes to shove, he is an asshole and he isn't going to let anyone push him around and insult him. He's just not going to sit here and take Kagami's shit.
"And I'm fucking shit up? Why do you want to leave me so badly? Do you have someone else? That's it, isn't it? You wanna leave me for somebody else. Bastard."
Kagami glares at him, his eyes like two red hot and smoldering coals and Aomine can see the anger settling in them. He still doesn't understand what is making Kagami so mad. He just wants it to all be over with, he wants them to be happy and laughing like they had been a few hours ago. He just wants Kagami's warmth to envelop him while he falls asleep in those thick and muscular arms. He just wants to go home and forget everything for awhile. He doesn't want to fight anymore, he's so tired of it.
After a long stretch of silence and the air inside the car had become heavy with tension, so heavy that it was nearly tangible, Kagami suddenly starts the car, shifts gears and spins out at a high speed, the tires screeching on the pavement.
Aomine feels a small flutter in his gut, one of those feelings you might as well call instinct. Intuition. Anxiety. Maybe it was nausea. Whatever it was, it was making him uneasy.
"Oi, Kagami... Slow down, the roads are covered in ice!" Aomine scolds.
Kagami doesn't look at him, doesn't take his eyes off the road. He doesn't utter a sound and presses his foot harder to the gas pedal.
"You take care of me, huh? You're the responsible one, eh? Take responsibility for this, you bastard," Kagami seethes finally. "Do you really think I'd put up with all your bullshit if I had found someone else? You think I'm cheating on you? That's a bit hypocritical coming out of your mouth, don't you think?"
Aomine's heart races and if he doubted his clarity before, he certainly doesn't now. "Okay, okay... I take back what I said! You're right! Just slow the fucking car down before you kill us!"
"But you were going to get behind the wheel and drive us home, under the influence. That could of killed us, Daiki. I'm not sure you really care about that."
"Fuck, Kagami! What is your fucking problem? I said I was sorry! Look, I'm not even drunk anymore. Can you just stop the car and calm down?" Aomine's voice sounds a little more frantic than he intends, but he is a little nervous; he doesn't have a good feeling about this. And Kagami, for whatever reason, is acting a little crazy and a whole lot of irrational right now and Aomine isn't quite sure how to handle that.
He glances at the speedometer and sees Kagami is flying down the ice slicked road at one hundred and sixty miles per hour. He's shocked, too shocked for words. What Kagami is doing is just plain stupidity. Never mind him getting caught, having the car impounded and Aomine possibly being reprimanded for this but it was like Kagami was in the Zone, not focused on anything else but one goal, whatever that was. And whatever that was, it was making Kagami insane and Aomine is so close to pissing himself from sheer fright.
"Taiga! Have you lost your fucking mind? Stop the car!"
Kagami doesn't stop, he doesn't slow down. He doesn't even look like he's heard Aomine. Not only is there a fear crawling under his skin, but Aomine can now feel anger boiling hot within his blood and it takes everything in him not to deck the stupid son of a bitch in the face.
"Stop the fucking car or I'll arrest you for reckless driving, you god damned bastard!" Aomine roars, clutching the edges of his seat.
Kagami slams down on the brakes abruptly, the tires coming to a screeching halt. The sudden force lurches Aomine forward in his seat, causing him to whack his head hard of the dashboard. He hisses out in pain and opens his eyes in time to see Kagami jerk back in his seat, eyes hooded and his lips pressed into a thin, wavering line. Only then did Aomine realize he hadn't been wearing his seat belt, which made him fucking livid.
Aomine turns in his seat, pulls back an arm and hauls off, hitting Kagami in the face. He can feel the crunch of cartilage underneath his knuckles when his fist connects with Kagami's nose. "Are you trying to fucking kill me, you stupid bastard?!"
Kagami utters a noise somewhere between a groan and a growl, something unintelligible spills off his lips in the form of a curse and his hand flies up to cup his bleeding nose. Aomine sees the red spurting through Kagami's fingers and instantly he wants to take back what he just did. He's still fucking irate, with good fucking reason, but he feels guilty because somewhere in the back of his mind, Satsuki is telling him this is all his fault.
"Get out," Kagami says calmly. His voice is muffled and nasally.
"O-oi... Where do you get off being so calm, you fucker? Have you lost it? What the hell were you tryin' to pull?" Aomine demands, gingerly raising a hand to his head. He feels the warmth of fluid seeping out of a gash on his forehead. He can't even begin to take a tranquil approach, all he's seeing is red.
Kagami doesn't answer him and Aomine pounds his fist on the dash.
"I'm done," he says quietly. "I can't do this anymore, Daiki. This relationship... shouldn't be so much work and... loving you shouldn't be this hard."
His eyes don't reach Aomine, so Aomine can't see the sincerity in them but he hears the conviction - the hurt - in Kagami's voice. Aomine remembers the vision of Kagami's back, standing at the door to their apartment with his gym bag slung over his shoulder.
"I'm done... I'm going back to America. I can't... I can't do this, Daiki. There's just been too many fuck ups for us to come back from. Too many lies, too many problems. I love you, you know but... the idea of continuing this hurts more than the idea of leaving."
Aomine's heart stops and his stomach flops. He hadn't had the urge to throw up before, but he definitely does now. This isn't a joke, it's not even a fight. There are no more options left here, Kagami just wants out. It isn't because he wants to be with someone else, there's no other reason other than Kagami is just... fed up with him.
"T-Taiga... You aren't serious... Right?" Aomine lets out a dry chuckle. "I mean, you're overreacting just a little, don't you think? Let's just go home, and I promise we'll start fresh in the morning. I swear. Let's just sleep it off. I'll even sleep on the couch but-" He begs because he realizes the severity of it all. Kagami isn't going to give him another chance and believe it or not, despite all anger and everything else, Aomine loves Kagami. He really does.
"Enough, Aomine. It's enough. I'm finished. Your promises no longer have any foundation. I don't trust you anymore."
Aomine's eyes fix on Kagami who's still looking off into some unseen horizon, avoiding Aomine as he says the words that slice through his insides as they resound through his mind. He doesn't even know what to say anymore. What can he say? He doesn't even think he could open his mouth to speak even if he wanted to, because there's a lump that settles in his throat like a jagged rock tearing at his esophagus as he tries to choke it down.
He follows Kagami's gaze out the windshield and notices they're stopped in the middle of an intersection. The roads are dead quiet and snow flakes fall weightlessly under the amber glow of the street lamps. The streetlight changes from red to green but Kagami remains in the middle of the intersection, unmoving. His chest rises and falls slowly under his winter coat and Aomine just wishes, if only for a moment, he could hear if Kagami's heart was pounding in tandem with his own.
Aomine blinks the sting of something hot and wet out of his eyes and he's not sure if it's blood or tears but he decides to go with the former, because he's Aomine fucking Daiki, the ace of Teikou; the ace of Touou; Tokyo's infamous demon detective - he doesn't fucking cry. And even if being with Kagami for all these years has kept his arrogance in touch, it's still apart of him and the fact that Kagami is the one breaking things off with him is beyond infuriating.
He finally scoffs when he sees that Kagami isn't willing to budge. When he finally let's the denial and the anger overwhelm the hurt and acceptance. "Tch. Kagami... You're going to live to regret this."
You can't leave me, dumbass. I need you.
Kagami turns his head to face him then and Aomine is blown away by the glint of tears welling in his crimson eyes and the quivering of his pale pink lips now stained red from the nosebleed. "You're probably right," he sighs, his voice hollow and bleak. He's not getting the reaction out of Kagami that he expected. "But, there's no point in wasting each other's time. It's not going to get better. I love you, Daiki but... I love myself too - enough to want more than this. I might live to regret not being with you, but... At least I'll be living."
Oh god, that hurts Aomine more than he wants it to. It's like a slap in the face. A punch to his pride. A deflation of his ego. Kagami is basically saying he's dead inside when he's with him and Aomine hadn't known he felt this way. How long had Kagami been feeling like this? How many weeks, months... years has Kagami been with him out of guilt and pity; for the sole purpose of comfort? How long has he not loved Aomine back? His love for Kagami has never changed, never dwindled - not even for a moment, not even during the-almost-drunken-slip-up-that-nearly-cost-him-his-relationship mishap between himself and a female officer. It had been Kagami that he'd seen, Kagami that he thought about and in the end, he didn't go through with it. Because he loves Kagami. With every fiber of his fucking being.
He opens his mouth to retort but closes it when he's blinded by a glaring bright white light. He squints automatically but he can't see around it to know where it's coming from. The light is getting more intense and he can suddenly hear the blaring of a horn, too loud for it to be an ordinary car.
He opens his mouth and screams "Drive!", but it's swallowed by the shrill noise and Kagami turns in the direction of the sound, his hand on the gear stick but it's already too late.
The large vehicle, presumably a truck and more so a semi, plows into their car with such a force that Aomine's vision is wiped completely. The actions following happen so quickly that Aomine's not even sure of the order of events.
The impact jostles him, he hears something in his neck crack along with the loud crunch and grate of metal and glass as the car skids across the intersection and he's forcefully ejected through the passenger side door. He watches in horror as Kagami's body jerks like a rag doll and his face twists in agony before he's scraping and tumbling along the cold asphalt. His head smacks with a sickly wet sound against the pavement and he blacks out. The only thing he thinks of that whole time is that it should have been him that was in the driver seat. Not Kagami.
He opens his eyes sometime later and searing pain rips through his joints and muscles as he tries to pull himself up off the ground. His lips are bruised and busted and his eyes are curtained in red but through that he can see the wreckage roughly twenty feet in front of him. There's smoke coming from the hood of their car and through the grill of the truck. Their car is wrapped around its fender like a child's tight embrace, the windshield has been shattered and the passenger side door had been torn off when Aomine's body had blown through it.
He tries to move but every bone in his body feels like it's broken. His head is spinning and splitting and his vision is swimming but he can't hear Kagami at all and he's not sure what that means, because there's also a violently loud ringing in his ears.
Not caring if anything is actually broken, Aomine grits his teeth and pushes himself up on one hand, bringing his leg up to support his weight on his knee. His left shoulder is a little slack and most likely dislocated and other than the twice received head wound, those seemed to be the extent of his injuries - minus the minor scrapes and scratches.
Aomine finally manages to stand - wobbles - and he moves forward a little too quickly and either slips on a patch of black ice or he just wasn't steady enough on his feet but Aomine keels over and his usually lightning fast reflexes don't save him from smashing his face to the pavement. It knocks the wind out of him and he begins choking, realizing that he's crying out Kagami's name on ragged and shallow breath.
He's already made his injuries worse in the several attempts he tries to make it over to the car, each time getting a step or two further than the last. His head hurts, it's bleeding profusely and he knows head wounds always bleed more than they should but he's guessing he's got at least a minor concussion and judging by the sharp, stabbing pain in his side every time he breathes, Aomine figures he's also got a few fractured ribs.
All of it irrelevant, none of it matters right now - the pain, his injuries, the fact he's teetering on the brink of unconsciousness; none of that matters because all he cares about is getting to Kagami. Aomine has no idea where the truck driver is or if he's even alive, he has no idea how badly damaged the vehicles are either. Kagami is trapped inside a car that could potentially catch fire, or any other number of things and he needs to get him out. Aomine needs to make sure Kagami is okay.
Finally, after what seems like hours, Aomine reaches their car and the sight he sees in front of him squeezes his chest tight, his lungs constrict and he can't physically breathe. His heart has stopped, he's sure of it because over this dead silence he would have heard his heart thud hard against his chest otherwise. There's so much pain he feels everywhere but none of it compares to the agony he feels tearing through him.
"T-Taiga," he chokes on a forced breath. He tastes blood in his mouth, heavy and metallic and thick on his tongue. He can smell blood, he can see blood and it's all over Kagami's limp body.
Kagami isn't a small man by any means, he's gotten even bigger since high school, but Aomine can't understand why he looks so small, so frail in the midst of the wreckage, trapped beneath the airbag and seat belt and crushed against the twisted metal of the semi's grill.
"Taiga," Aomine calls again, trying to hold himself steady by gripping the frame of the car. It isn't easy, his mind is reeling and his fingers have gone completely numb from the cold and snow. At least he hopes that's his problem and not nerve damage.
Kagami doesn't move and Aomine can't see past the blood in his own eyes or the thick smoke that fills the car. He knows that in an accident the first thing to do is call an ambulance but all he can think about is those few minutes it'll take to get here could be the most crucial in saving Kagami's life.
When he finally falls into the passenger seat of the car, he can see shards of sharp glass protruding from Kagami's cheek and neck and the shattered driver's side window beyond that. Blood streaks down his face in several crimson ribbons, still seeping through his coat. His head is lolled to the side at a near humanly impossible angle and Aomine fears that his neck may be broken and the thought alone is enough to expel all contents within his stomach over the middle console of the car.
When he's done gagging and choking and the tears in his eyes burn but flow freely, Aomine lifts a trembling hand underneath Kagami's nose and prays that he feels the warmth of breath fall on his fingers.
But before he has the chance, the loud and blatant blare of the truck horn sounds causing Aomine to jump and white hot heat rips through his body and across his vision. When his eyes regain their focus, he sees that Kagami hasn't responded to the horn that's still going, which tells Aomine two things and one of them makes him want to die right here on the spot.
The driver of the truck is dead, the delay of any reaction meant he had recently succumbed to whatever injuries he had. And if the truck driver hadn't survived, the odds of Kagami being alive weren't in Aomine's favour.
Panicked, nauseous; heartbroken and hollow, Aomine fishes his phone out of his jeans and prays to the gods that it still works.
The screen lights up and he dials the emergency number and frantically requests an ambulance. He's not even sure where they are and he can't really hear the emergency respondent over the noise of the truck horn. He's not paying attention to any of it because Kagami is all he sees.
Aomine lets the phone fall from his hands and devastated, he rests his head against Kagami's and places a hand over his chest. The jacket is there so he can't even feel if Kagami's heart is beating.
The other hand Aomine cups his cheek with, slides a thumb over the bone. Kagami is so cold and Aomine doesn't want to touch him like this because it makes everything so real.
He can't stop thinking about the argument, the hurt in Kagami's eyes just before the impact. The fact that it should have been him driving because he usually is. They wouldn't be here in the middle of this mess if it weren't for Aomine's stupidity.
"Kagami... Kagami, get up," Aomine pleads. It falls on deaf ears because Kagami doesn't move.
Aomine's chest is so tight and his heart is so heavy, he can feel a fissure rip through the organ like an earth shattering quake. Kagami is all he's ever wanted. Since he brought basketball into in his life, since he gave Aomine a reason to keep on living. It wasn't like Aomine was suicidal, but he wasn't living life, he was just there.
"Kagami... please move... just a little. Say something... Make a noise... Anything."
And it was like Aomine could see the world from a whole different perspective, everything was so much brighter, fine tuned and sharp. Life was exciting again, the world was intriguing again and the one person that stood in the centre of his universe was beyond all the beauty the world had to offer. Kagami was much like an angel and not just on the court with invisible wings that carried him to impossible heights. He was Aomine's angel, his saviour that came into his life just at the right time.
He believed in fate then, believed that it was fate that brought Kagami to him but he refused to believe that fate would take him away. It wouldn't be that cruel, because Kagami meant more to Aomine than basketball and if losing faith in the game he loved hollowed him out, then what would he become by losing the one person he's ever actually loved?
"Oi... Bakagami... You stupid bastard," he chokes, sobs. "Wake up... Please."
He tries to unbuckle the seat belt but he's afraid if he does that, Kagami will fall limp into his arms, lifeless. He'll be forced to see that awful bent and twisted neck up close and for sure he knows he'll scream. He doesn't want to do that, he's still not ready to accept that Kagami is really gone. He's not gone, not yet. There's still hope. Right?
He tries to get underneath the airbag and bypass Kagami's jacket but he's trapped and compacted tightly in the wreckage and all Aomine feels is something cold and smooth brush against his fingertips. He chances a blurred look at Kagami's disfigured neck and catches a glimpse of silver.
"Y'know... You've been wearing Himuro's ring around your neck for a long time now."
"Yeah, a little bit, asshole."
"Idiot Ahomine... I've told you before what the ring means to me and I've told you before it has nothing to do with you and me."
"Tch, stupid. I ain't tryin' to say that."
"Then what are you trying to say?"
"Just shut up and let me say it!"
"So hurry up and spit it out!"
"I want you to wear a ring for me too."
"Dumbass, I'm not going to go buy a ring and hang it around my neck -"
"Bakagami, shut up, will ya? I ain't finished yet. That's not what I mean, stupid."
"Well be more straightforward when you talk!"
"I'm sayin' that the next time you go to America, I wanna come with you."
"What does going to America with me have to do with Tatsuya's ring?"
"You really are completely clueless, aren't you?"
"I'm sayin' I'm gonna get you a ring and we're gonna go to America. And then, we're gonna get married."
Aomine doesn't care who sees him now, he will cry (he is crying) for Kagami, he will let the tears of pain and anguish flow until they can't anymore. He doesn't care that crying will do nothing to solve the problem but at this point every inch of his body aches, he's barely grasping onto the fringe of consciousness and the man he loves is dead.
"Taiga," he breathes. "I didn't want you to leave. I shoulda said that before this happened but you can't go."
Aomine doesn't want to believe the cruel truth. His eyes drift over Kagami's broken body and his breath seems to catch under the hardened lump in his throat. Kagami's pallor is ashen and his lips have turned blue and purple. Aomine wants to warm him, wants to pluck those shards of glass from his stupidly angelic face. He wants to just fix that twisted neck and make everything all better again.
"You stupid asshole..." Aomine sobs. "What the fuck do I do now?"
He doesn't know what to do, he's lost and unfocused. He's cold too. He touches Kagami's lips with his fingertips and chokes on a sob at the startlingly cold feel of them. There so blue, like the colour of Aomine's hair.
"If we had kids, I don't want them gettin' your stupid eyebrows. We'd have to make sure of that."
"Genetics are genetics, asshole. I don't want our kids getting your ugly blue hair."
"Hah? What was that about 'genetics are genetics'? I'm fuckin' hot, my blue hair is hot. Our kids should look like me."
"Haha, idiot. 'The only one who can have kids as hot as me is me?'"
"You really are a moron. But yeah... something like that."
"You're so fucking full of yourself. Yeah well... Whatever the kids look like, they'll be ours, right? So it really doesn't matter who they look like. As long as they come from you, Ahomine."
"They had better come from me, you idiot!"
He cries, he grieves. He holds Kagami's face in his hands and contemplates ending his life right here with him. He knows what the future will bring, he knows that if he fast forwards through this moment to get to the next, it will be a version of him far worse than Touou, far worse than the man who's binge drinking nearly every day to forget the images that haunt him. Because of all the horrific and gruesome crime scenes he's come across, nothing will ever compare to this one. This moment will be seared into his memory for the rest of his life and there will never be anything that will make him forget it.
There isn't time to think of an escape from this life because Aomine's body temperature has already dipped dangerously low and he's lost a fair amount of blood through the head wounds and it's quite possible that he's bleeding internally. His body is no longer in agony, he's just numb. The only pain he can feel is the sharp pang in his chest that's everlasting. And the thought he has is that if he is bleeding internally, if he is going to succumb to hypothermic shock or bleed out, then that would be okay. He doesn't deserve a quick and painless death, not after what he's done. There will be a special place in Hell, reserved just for a bastard like him but he's okay with that so long as Kagami is able to reach the Heavens on those magnificent wings of his.
He scoots over the console, his breath coming out in plumes of white fog, and wraps Kagami in his arms. Puts his head to Kagami's frigid forehead. His vision has already started to blacken around the edges and though the truck horn is still blasting, he thinks he can hear the wail of sirens in the distance. He laughs cynically. It won't do him any good now. He doesn't want to live past this point anyways.
He smiles to himself as he inhales a sharp breath, still smelling the faint scent of Old Spice in Kagami's hair. He'll take that to the Hell he's destined for. It'll be his own piece of private Heaven, a reminder of his angel.
Aomine's eyes open and the world is suddenly absorbed through his glazed vision. The world that is Tetsu's apartment. He's standing in Tetsu and Satsuki's kitchen and the sounds of laughter and idle chatter float in from the living room.
Aomine blinks several times and then raises his hand and frantically rubs it through his blue hair. His heart is racing in his chest and he can't understand what's going on.
"Aomine-kun?" Tetsu looks at him quizzically, head cocked to the side with his arm outstretched, beer in hand.
"Oi, Ahomine, what the hell is taking you so long?"
Aomine's heart stops and there's a flutter in his stomach so ferocious it makes him nauseous. When his heart resumes beating, it's throbbing heavily beneath his chest. It hurts. Because he knows that gruff voice better than anyone. He knows how that voice sounds when it's challenging him, when it's full of laughter and when it's calling out his name, desperate and wanton.
He thinks this isn't fair, whatever cruel dream he's having right now isn't fair. He can't face Kagami and that wide grin of his, those burning garnet eyes looking at him like Aomine is the only one he sees.
Tetsu is still staring at him with a look of concern and Kagami steps into the kitchen.
"Hey, what the hell, Ahomine? Don't think you can ditch me and hide in here away from Momoi. She's making us play next."
Aomine blinks once, twice, three times. He honestly can't believe his eyes. His mouth drops open a little because Kagami stands in front of him in the same plaid shirt and jeans he was wearing the night of the accident, looking good enough to fuck right here in Tetsu's kitchen with that half frown, half smirk and his stupid eyebrows pinched together in a scowl that doesn't suit his beautiful face.
This has to be a dream...
"T-Tai... ga." Kagami's name slips through his lips in a surprised whisper, partly confused and partly elated that even if it is a dream, Kagami is here in front of him with a healthy pink hue in his cheeks and no glass impaling him. His neck isn't twisted and bent horrifically, he's perfectly fine.
"I think there's something wrong with him, Kagami-kun," Tetsu says.
There is something wrong with him. He's dreaming, unconscious, maybe even in a coma and Kagami is dead but he's right here in front of him. He's losing his fucking mind.
Aomine staggers over to the redhead and stares at him for a moment, watching his brows knit in confusion as he searches Aomine's eyes for an answer to what he's doing. He reaches out and cups Kagami's cheek, smooths his thumb over his cheekbone and he feels the warmth of his flesh and he laughs, he sighs relief, he almost cries because Kagami feels so real.
Kagami swats his hand away and looks past Aomine at Tetsu. "How much has he had to drink, Kuroko?"
"I don't know. I came in here and he was standing in the middle of the kitchen with a bottle in his hand that he just suddenly dropped. I managed to catch it, but he hasn't spoken since then."
Aomine can't tear his eyes away from Kagami, he watches all the muscles and lines move, watches as Kagami glares at him with annoyance and disapproval.
"You idiot. Are you fucking drunk again?" he hisses, no louder than a hushed whisper.
And memories suddenly overwhelm him, moving backwards through his mind like a videotape on rewind. The accident, the argument, the make out session in the elevator. All of it happened but it hasn't happened yet. He's been here before, but he's never actually left. He and Kagami haven't had this conversation but they've had one similar.
He looks down at the clothes he's wearing, looks at Tetsu and now Satsuki and Kise who have also made their way into the kitchen to see what the problem is. They all look the same as they did the night of the accident, this night, because the accident hasn't happened yet.
Aomine exhales a long winded breath, It's full of relief and strangely, some sort of epiphany. He isn't that smart but he sure as hell isn't stupid and he thinks he understands what's just happened and what needs to be done.
He looks around again and everyone is just staring at him in puzzlement.
"Dai-chan...?" Satsuki's wearing a pretty blue blouse that matches the colour of Tetsu's hair. Her azalea pink eyes shine with concern and curiosity and her cotton candy coloured hair is tied up loosely, rebel strands curling here and there. Aomine hasn't really noticed it before because well, Satsuki is Satsuki, but she really is beautiful.
"Aominicchi?" Kise's eyebrow quirks, so does his mouth. Kise is annoying but he's one of Aomine's closest friends, someone he can say he's close to being on par with. He's dressed casually and there's some super model he's brought here with him tonight, he's been telling Kuroko that 'she's the one!' even though he's been dating her for a week and by next week it'll be an actress or pop-star or groupie. Kise is a really big slut.
If he remembers correctly, they're in the middle of playing some stupid game that Kagami brought back with him from America and Momoi insisted they play it and in about five minutes, Midorima and Takao will show up. Midorima will complain that he didn't want to come because today is an unlucky day for Cancers and his lucky item will be a red and black square sake cup. Takao will come bustling in behind him with two bottles of sake in his hands and insisting they all drink from Midorima's cup. Midorima will argue with him about touching the lucky item and Takao will pout and Midorima will give in to him anyways.
Aomine will take a bottle of the sake and polish it off to himself. He did take the sake, but he isn't going to this time.
Kagami looks at him again, panic pulling at his features. "Hey, Aomine. Are you really okay?"
Aomine blinks again, just as there's a knock at the door. He shakes his head and smiles half heartedly for Kagami. "I'm fine... I'm good."
Satsuki calls out, "Midoriiiiiin!"
Kise turns on his heel and heads back into the living room. He can hear Kise telling his date that 'Aominicchi is really weird sometimes, but not as weird as Midorimacchi. Just smile and nod if he talks to you, which he probably won't because he's kind of stuck up, haha!'
Tetsu shuffles the beer in front of his face. "Aomine-kun, are you going to drink this and join the party? Kise-kun is right, you are strange sometimes. Especially at this moment." His voice is soft and almost soothing.
Aomine shifts his eyes from Tetsu and the beer over to Kagami, who's got a light scowl on his face. He can remember that right before Takao and Midorima show up, he's had about three beers. This will be his fourth, and then he'll drink the bottle of sake and have a few more beers until he's lost count. Long after everyone else has had a social drink or two. Long before he and Kagami fight and Kagami goes a little insane and Aomine punches him, breaking his nose and then Kagami dies without him ever telling Kagami just how much he means to him. That he's worth far more than a bottle of sake and limitless beers.
He smirks then. Takao is in the background laughing gleefully and making fun of the 'square' sake cup. The banter between him, Midorma and Satsuki has already begun.
"Come on, Shin-chan! We're inside the house, what's the worst that can happen? And didn't you say that Oha Asa said that Scorpios are number one today? I'm all the luck you need, haha!"
"Waah, that's a really pretty cup, Midorin! Say, can I have it when you don't need it anymore?"
"The answer is no, Takao. You know the rules. No one other than the person with the specific sign is allowed to touch the lucky item. Then it's bad luck ten fold. You need to listen to Oha Asa more often. Besides, if a square cup is so interesting to you, then perhaps you should have purchased one when you bought the sake. But I suppose small things amuse small minds, isn't that right, Takao?"
"Oh Shin-chan, you're so boring!. It's not the square cup that interests me, it's your reaction haha. C'mon, let's have a few drinks and loosen up!"
Aomine pushes the bottle away and grins at Tetsu. "No, I'm good."
Tetsu eyes him suspiciously, as does Kagami who's been pretty quiet this entire time. It isn't like him to not be loud.
Aomine suddenly remembers how it was to not hear anything at all out of blue tinted lips. He shudders visibly as Tetsu walks out of the kitchen and he hears Kise thanking him for the beer he must have given him.
"Hey, seriously. What the fuck's up with you?" Kagami asks, raising a brow.
Aomine shrugs. He's so happy that he's figured it out. So elated that he's been given a second chance. He's not into the party anymore. They've had their dinner, which was just for the four of them and then Kise and his date show up and as usual, Takao and Midorima are late and he's supposed to go in there and fuck up the game royally because he's a little buzzed and doesn't understand the American rules. He's supposed to continue to piss Kagami off and he even thinks at one point he's supposed to pass out in Takao's lap while Takao hiccups uncontrollably and gets drool all over his jeans. Then when he wakes up, everyone is gone and Kagami is fuming and Satsuki asks them to stay the night in their spare bedroom. Kagami refuses, Tetsu tries to convince him and Aomine complains. A lot. He wants to stay too so he can drink what's left of the alcohol he and Kagami and Kise brought. He wants to stay so he can sleep in a warm bed next to Kagami and maybe Kagami will suck him off, and if he's lucky Kagami might even let him fuck him. He's supposed to kick up a fuss when Kagami drags him out of the apartment. They're supposed to fight and get into an accident. Aomine is supposed to die of a heartbreak several minutes after his lover dies.
He's supposed to tell Kagami he loves him, because he really does. And that's exactly what he does.
"Hey... Bakagami. I really love you, you know that?"
Kagami gapes with his eyes wide and flushes rose pink. "I-idiot! What are you saying out here in the open like that?!"
Aomine waves a dismissive hand. "Who cares?"
Kagami bites his lip and scowls, moving closer to Aomine. He can smell the Old Spice in his hair, off his blue and yellow plaid shirt. He remembers it was the last thing he remembers.
"Are you drunk? Can you stop -"
"Kagami. I'm not drunk."
"You're acting really fucking weird and it's kind of pissing me off," Kagami mutters quietly so that the others don't hear what Kagami thinks is going to be an argument. Aomine isn't going to let that happen because Aomine doesn't want any of his vision - premonition - out of body experience - whatever the fuck you want to call that weird shit that just happened to him - to happen.
Aomine laughs and pulls Kagami into a tight embrace, Kagami utters a surprised 'Oof!' when Aomine squeezes. He nuzzles into Kagami's two-toned red hair and grins. "Let's go home, Bakagami."
Kagami pulls away and again, looks at him warily. "What?"
"Let's go home," Aomine says honestly. He repeats Kagami's angry words from the argument that hasn't happened yet, and hopefully won't. "Because I just want to spend some time alone with you, you stupid bastard."
Kagami's face lights up, and Aomine's sure he's not even aware of it. His toothy grin stretches from one ear to the other. "Re-really?"
Aomine smirks at the fluccuation in shades on Kagami's face.
Kagami pouts and turns away. "I-I mean, yeah sure... Do whatever you want, Aho."
Aomine takes Kagami's chin in his hands and plants a sweet and chaste kiss on the plush pink lips that are warm and smooth and not at all blue. "I plan to," he says against them.
Kagami smirks too and darts out of the kitchen to break the news of their departure. He hears the disappointment from the crowd and Midorima saying something unnecessary, as per usual.
He thinks he's averted disaster because the universe works in funny ways. Fate gave him Kagami when he was at his worst and they were ready to take him away to remind him that he needs Kagami, that he is there to save Aomine from whatever demons he may have and that he must treat his angel properly. He has to show just how much he loves this saving grace because if he takes Kagami for granted, the universe will take him back. Heaven will reclaim their angel.
Kagami bursts back into the kitchen and grabs Aomine's hand. They leave with cheerful goodbyes and they make out in the elevator. Kagami's tongue is liquid heat when it trails over Aomine's Adam's apple, his fingers are soft but rough when they graze against his scalp as Aomine nips down the side of Kagami's neck.
They get to the car and without a word, Aomine hands over the keys with a kiss and gets in the passenger side of the car, makes sure he buckles his seat belt. Being in the car brings back painful memories, trudges up a dread that's slick like sludge in the pit of his stomach because despite everything, an accident can still happen. But he also believes he had some sort of lesson to learn today and he thinks he's passed so he only hopes that karma will be good to him this time around.
The car ride home is good so far. They don't argue, they laugh. Kagami keeps his eyes on the road and a slow pace and they come to an intersection that Aomine recognizes all too well. His heart stops at the red light along with the car and Aomine stops breathing all together. He's so rigid and scared and his hands are trembling. They're not at the red light for more than thirty seconds when a semi big rig, white and blue, comes flying through the intersection. Aomine draws in a sharp breath and squeezes his eyes shut, preparing for the impact.
"Haha... why are you making that stupid face?"
Aomine slowly opens an eye, peeks through blue-black lashes. "Hn? I wasn't makin' a face." He looks around the intersection and the truck is gone, the roads are empty and the space is silent with the exception of the low drone of the car stereo playing some classic rock. They're still intact, Kagami is very much alive and is grinning at him with soft pink lips that he bites.
"I bet you were thinking something dirty, you perv," Kagami says, pushing on the gas and driving through the intersection. Everything is fine, the snow falls on to the windshield and it melts before the wipers have time to brush the flakes away.
Aomine smirks lazily. "Maybe."
"Fucking and basketball are all you think about," Kagami remarks, shaking his head in mock disapproval.
Aomine reaches out and grabs Kagami's hand. He's so happy that he's been given this second chance, this whatever it was so that he was able to make the right choice and save Kagami's life like Kagami once saved his. Continues to save, because not only was Aomine headed down a path of alcoholism and self destruction but Kagami was about to walk out of his life too. Without Kagami, nothing matters anymore because Kagami is all he's ever wanted.
Kagami quirks a suspicious eyebrow but laces his fingers through Aomine's over the gearshift.
"You're all I think about," Aomine says, feeling heat fill his cheeks.
Kagami's face flushes too, and it's far easier to see on his alabaster skin and Aomine thinks it's such a beautiful shade. "Idiot... Are you sure you're not drunk?" He laughs a ittle but he squeezes Aomine's hand.
Aomine swears he's not drunk and he swears he isn't going to drink again. Kagami seems to believe him for now. Aomine's okay with that, he'll never give Kagami another reason to doubt him again.
They pull into their building's parking lot and they barely make it across the threshold of their apartment before they're shedding their clothes and stumbling to the bedroom, pulling and tugging; licking and biting. Aomine pushes Kagami down on their bed, fits himself between Kagami's smooth and defined thighs and lays a trail of wet kisses down his creamy skin, uses his fingers to stretch and probe and drag long, sultry moans from the redhead's throat. He gasps and arches into Aomine's touch but flips them and goes down on Aomine, swallowing him whole and milks him to an impending climax. Before it's too late, he seats himself on Aomine's cock and rides him out and Aomine grips his hips so hard that he knows he's leaving bruises in Kagami's pale flesh. He rocks up every time Kagami bears down and all Aomine can think about is how fucking amazing and gorgeous Kagami looks in all his sweat slicked and sinewy glory. With a few short tugs at Kagami's cock in concert with his rough thrusts, they climax together; more proof that they are made for each other, in sync and in the zone when it matters the most.
Aomine surges up to meet Kagami's lips with his own, holding him steady in between his legs and drags a hand through sweat soaked hair. Kagami snakes his arms around Aomine's neck and rests his forehead on Aomine's. He pants, he grins, he kisses Aomine with short, chaste pecks until they finally catch their breath.
They clean up and crawl into bed together, Kagami on his side and Aomine drapes himself over Kagami, caging him in; securing him. They fall asleep with a mutter of Love you, idiot and Love you too, asshole. It's comfortable and easy and Aomine doesn't ever want to let this moment go. He just wants to push the pause button and stay right here, warm and content with Kagami in his arms instead of the all too real premonition he had earlier in the night.
Aomine opens his eyes to feel the warmth of the sun stretching across his face, to birds chirping and Kagami snoring. He feared when he fell asleep that he'd wake up in a hospital or in that freezing cold car with the horn blaring and the lifeless Kagami and what happened last night would have just been a dream. Kagami stirs in between his arms and Aomine can already feel his morning wood twitching in anticipation.
"Hey... Bakagami, wake up."
"Wha...?" Kagami mumbles, still clearly half asleep.
"I'm takin' a vacation, so you gotta get up. We're goin' to America."
"Ahomine... shut up with that shit first thing in the morning," Kagami complains tiredly.
Aomine kisses the juncture of Kagami's neck and along his shoulder. "Taiga..."
"Let's get married. For real."
Because Aomine loves Kagami. He really, really does.