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The Talk

Chapter Text

There was stillness that made Lena’s skin crawl. She loved nights like this before, the peacefulness of it all. Times like these she knew that Kara… no Supergirl was at least safe because there was no crime going on and before… most of those times had been spent watching movies or just talking for hours on end with Kara. She remembered the warm feeling that her former best friend brought to her life during those moments. She felt at home and dare say it, safe, when they were still okay. When they were still friends.

But the past is the past and so the CEO just sighed while swirling her expensive scotch as she stood behind the glass doors of her balcony.

And now all the stillness only brought around anxiety. Without Kara, without her safe space, she just felt that it was the calm before a storm.

A knock suddenly pulled her out of her musings.

“Lena?” muffled voice came on the other side of the door.

Lena walked over to her door after putting her glass down at the counter top. She then proceeded to look through the video feed on who the person that knocked on her door. The CEO pinched the bridge of her nose when she saw no other than Alex Danvers waving at the camera.

“I know you’re in there since Jess told me you went home an hour ago,” Alex said impatiently.

“What do you want?” Lena’s voice crackled through the intercom.

“I’ve got wine?” it came out as a question and Alex placed the bottle near the camera and continued, “Ka… Someone told me that this is the cheapest wine you like…”

The door suddenly opened a little bit and Lena leaned on the door frame and looked at the former DEO agent. Alex tried to smiled but it came out as a grimace and said, “May I come in?” Lena side stepped, got the wine and let Alex inside her penthouse.

As the door clicked to a close, Lena was already trying to open the wine behind her counter top while Alex was looking around her penthouse.

“Why are you here?”

A pop was heard as the wine was opened. The CEO then retrieved two wine glasses from a cabinet and poured the wine.

“Well?”

“To be honest? I didn’t think you’d talk to me let alone let me in in your apartment,” Alex replied.

Walking towards Alex with both glasses, “You still didn’t answer my question.”

Alex sighed. “Well I wanted to talk to you about… Oh thank you,” Alex said as she was handed the glass of wine by Lena, “About… you and Kara.”

“Hmmmm,” was all Lena replied and walked towards her sofa. She gestured to her guest to sit down with her as well. Alex nervously walked and positioned herself at the other end of the sofa and sat. “What about Supergirl?” Lena sloshed her wine carefully on the glass and smelled the wine before sitting.

“Stop calling her that. She has a name you know,” Alex replied. She fiddled with her glass of wine, sitting uncomfortably at the expensive couch.

Lena smirked, “But she is Supergirl.”

“Yeah… but…” Alex closed her eyes out of frustration and Lena just quirked her eyebrow. The CEO sipped her wine and waited for Alex to continue. A huff came out of Alex a few seconds later and looked at the CEO with determination in her eyes. “Look, she was never Supergirl with you nor Kara Zor El… She was just Kara.”

“Kara Zor El,” Lena’s voice cracked a little and she couldn’t help it. The CEO has not said that name out loud before. Alex nodded. She then steeled herself, “Doesn’t really matter now does it?”

“Lena,” Alex started and let out an exasperated sigh, “It does matter. She wanted to tell you before everything happened. It was my fault she didn’t tell you sooner.” The agent put her glass on the table. “She wanted to protect you and come to think of it… she just wanted to keep you for herself… She just wanted to be Kara with you. Not Supergirl and not Kara Zor El.”

“Heard that one before,” Lena chuckled sarcastically and took another sip of her wine.

Alex was wiping her face up and down out of frustration at this point. “Ugh,” Alex stopped wiping her face. “I know all of our apologies will not warrant your forgiveness, Lena. We fucked up. I fucked it up so bad with convincing Kara…”

“But she still had a choice, correct?” Lena stood up and walked towards the bar where the wine was located. “She still had a choice to tell me even though all of you didn’t want to.” The CEO then poured another round of wine to her glass.

“I know but we all make mistakes, Lena. And we grow as a person by learning from those mistakes,” Alex replied and when Lena just shrugged, she continued, “You have hurt yourself enough don’t you think?”

Has she suffered enough? Was she hurting on the thought that maybe she could have handled it better? Does her choice of keeping distance and pretending it doesn’t hurt her, hurt more than she can understand? Does she love Kara enough to forgive her? Was all it her choice?

A resounding yeses sounded in her head.

Was anyone brave enough to say that to her face? None… well until Alex Danvers pointed it out.

Lena heard a faint booming sound of boxes imploding in her head.

The CEO stared at her former friend too long that the wine overflowed from the glass. Lena didn’t seem to notice so Alex said, “Lena… the wine…”

“Huh?”

Alex pointed at the wine glass. “Shit!” cursed Lena. She put down the wine a little to forcefully and it tumbled, crashing to the floor spilling more wine. “Ah fuck!”

Alex hurriedly went to sink, trying to find a dish rag. Lena was gripping the counter top, when Alex tried to hand her the rag.

“Just leave it,” Lena said through clenched teeth.

Alex raised her arms in surrender and walked away. She sat again and knew that Lena was contemplating in her head on what to do next.

A minute passed by before Alex heard Lena say, “She thinks I am villain.”

“What?”

“She came here the other night and said to me if I continue whatever it is I am doing that she would treat me like any other villain,” Lena’s voice cracked.

“Lena… she never thought of you as a villain. Never was and never will. Look,” Alex patted the spot next to her, “I know what you’re talking about… She’s giving you a choice and I know it’s tough love but… she just wants you to know, that the ball is in your court now.”

Lena sat beside Alex and asked, “I… I don’t understand?”

“She’s just saying that if you want to forgive her, it’s your choice. If you want to continue to work with Lex knowing he’s up to no good like he always does, is still your choice. She just realized that she can’t control whatever you decide. She just laid out the possible outcomes of whatever it is you will do,” Alex laid a comforting hand on Lena’s own, “That’s why I said we grow as a person from our mistakes. You of all people know that. You always tried to correct whatever mistakes that people around you did or whatever you did. You try so hard to do good wherever you go and it has always been your choice.”

Lena was trying hard not to cry.

“You’re not your family, Lena. We all know that. You’ve always been a good person… always been the hero… we’ve just never voiced it out and for that. I’m sorry,” Alex side hugged Lena.

“It just sounded like she’s giving me an ultimatum,” Lena sighed.

“She’s saying that she’s ready to do what is right whatever it is you choose. But the question is, are you ready if she does what she has to do to stop you?” Alex replied.

“What do you mean?” Lena was morbidly curious. She didn’t planned that far enough if she was being honest with herself.

“You do know that she won’t hurt a single hair in your body, right?” Alex asked with sadness in her voice. Lena just looked at her with questioning eyes. “She’d rather die than hurt you, Lena.”

“Well… she hurt me with the lying,” Lena whispered.

“And she’s kicking herself for that every fucking single day,” Alex sighed, “But you do know what I mean, right?”

Lena nodded and leaned in unto Alex.

Minutes passed by before Lena asked, “Why are you doing this?”

Alex positioned herself so that she was facing Lena, “For Kara but more for you.”

Lena’s eyes went wide. She didn’t expect that answer.

“I… I know that you had difficult past. And so did Kara but she… well…” Alex fidgeted with her hands, “She had us throughout the whole difficult thing but you on the other hand… I don’t want this sound bad or anything but it seems you had a difficult thing to go through as well…”

“Things… Difficult things,” Lena voiced out.

“Difficult things… that you went through alone but you’re not alone anymore, Lena. You have Kara, me, Eliza, Kelly, Nia, J’onn… to go through with all of these.”

“But I’m not family…”

“That is where you are wrong, Lena. You are family,” Alex firmly stated.

“But…”

“Lena, you cannot choose who you are related to by blood but you can definitely choose who your family are,” Alex looked at Lena softly. “And I did this because first, I love you because you’re part of our family, you’re technically my sister in law and second, you need to hear everything from another perspective to guide you even if it hurts because that’s what families do.”

“Thank you, Alex,” Lena replied honestly, “I think I needed to her that.”

Alex smiled and squeezed Lena’s hand.

“Well, I said my piece… Just think about it, okay?” Alex got up from the couch. Lena got up as well and lead the agent towards the door. But before Alex could open the door, Lena hugged her.

“I just need time to process things,” Lena whispered to Alex.

“Okay,” was all Alex replied after their hug and walked out the door.

Chapter Text

It’s been almost a week after the talk with Alex and something that she had said has been nagging at the back of Lena’s brain but she can’t remember what exactly it was. It’s giving her headaches just trying to think about it. And not only that, Lex has been kind and helpful to the point that was unreal. Don’t get her wrong because Lex has been this sweet and thoughtful brother when they were younger but now? It just makes her think that he’s planning something and it is making her uneasy.

It was like Rhea all over again. She ate up all those encouraging talks and sweet lines that Rhea uttered before and it led to an almost world wide invasion. And to think that she was almost married to Mon El. And for her that was even worse.

Alex said she had to learn from her mistakes. Easier said than done. Especially when you’re so deep in denial that you can’t even distinguish what is right from wrong. And because of that she has been overthinking everything she’s doing to the point that she can’t even decide whether to have a kale salad with chicken or that mango avocado and macadamia salad for lunch. Jess took pity on her and just ordered her the pear and parmesan salad paired with a double cheeseburger and chilli cheese fries from Big Belly Burger instead.

Turns out that the salad was Jess’s lunch and that her secretary just didn’t want Lena to feel bad about herself for eating junk food so she put her salad with the order. Lena thanked Jess and gave back the salad and ate the burger and fries after a minute of glaring at it.

After finishing the entire thing, which was a surprise in itself since most of the time she’s only able to eat half of it and giving the other half to Kara before… There it goes again. Her mind just wanders to Kara every minute of every single fucking day like always. Lena decided to have an impromptu visit to Catco just to get a glimpse of the Superhero. The CEO convinced herself that she needed to talk to Andrea for God knows what. She’ll think of an excuse for the visit while going there which is about 15 minutes give or take. And so she told Jess to hold all her calls, called up her driver and went to Catco.

---

Lena straightened her skirt and her sleeves before the elevator opened up on Catco’s floor and strode at the editorial floor like she owned the place. She kept glancing around hoping to get a glimpse of Kara on her table but it seems that the reporter was nowhere in sight. She had to keep up appearances and so she walked towards her former office but was stopped by a secretary saying that Andrea was out for the day. She smiled and thanked the person before walking away towards the elevator. She then saw Nia staring at her curiously.

“Interesting,” Lena thought and made her way to the junior reporter. Which in turn made Nia suddenly panic and tried to organized her desk before Lena came over.

“HI!” Lena said as she approached Nia.

“Kara’s on assignment today,” the junior reporter replied hastily.

“Oh. I wasn’t here for her. I wanted to talk to Andrea about…” Lena tried to think on excuse but nothing came to mind, “Some stuff.” The CEO tried not to grimace at her own words. She tried to smile but it came out as a leer with too many teeth showing making Nia recoil somewhat from her seat, clutching random papers to her chest and whimpered an, “O-Okay.”

“So,” Lena said crossing her arms while trying to stop from fidgeting.

“So,” Nia parroted back.

Every other person within Nia’s vicinity was trying not to eavesdrop. Some were not so subtly eyeing the two behind their laptops and a particular person was just glaring at Lena a few tables down near the window.

“How are you?” Lena asked with real curiousity.

“Me?” asked Nia with wide eyes and the CEO simply nodded.

“I’m good but… why are you asking me? It’s not like we talk,” Nia replied in a whisper.

Lena sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose. “I’m trying here, Nia,” she whispered back.

Nia read through Lena’s body language and found that the CEO is clearly uncomfortable to what she was doing. But she sensed that Lena did indeed was being truthful. Following her instincts, Nia perked up and said, “Have you had lunch? Want to have lunch with me and talk?”

“Umm… yeah yeah sure,” Lena answered in surprise.

“Okay! I just have to type the last paragraph on this article and we’re good to go,” Nia started typing but stopped after a few seconds. “Is that okay with you?” the junior reporter asked nervously. She was internally kicking herself for making the Lena Luthor wait for her.

“No problem. I’ll just…” Lena saw a chair near Nia’s table, seeing that the owner of the chair is nowhere to be found, moved it so she can seat in it in front of the table, “sit here.”

After a few minutes of the sound of typing from Nia and background noise of phones ringing and people bustling around them, Lena spoke up, “So… who’s that guy like a few rows down near the window?”

“Who…” Nia tried to turned around when Lena grabbed one of her hands and hissed, “Don’t look! He’ll notice you.”

The junior reporter hummed and asked, “Black hair, chiseled jaw and nice eyes?”

Lena leaned her face to one of her hands and inspected her nails on the other hand to look bored and nodded.

“That’s William Dey,” Nia smirked and continued typing. “Why?”

“Oh nothing. He had been glaring at me ever since I walked towards you,” Lena shrugged and continued inspecting her nails.

“Don’t mind him. He’s kind of a creeper,” Nia continued to type.

Nia once again just hummed after a minute while saving her file then sent an email with her article attached to Snapper and said, “I’m done! We can go have lunch now!” The junior reporter stood up and looked at Lena.

“Where do you want to eat? My treat,” Lena smiled and got up from her chair.

---

“So what do you want to talk about?” Nia was twirling her pasta on her fork as she asked Lena. The CEO was looking at the window while stirring her cup of coffee.

“Can I be honest?” Lena looked nervously at Nia.

Nia just nodded as she ate her pasta.

“I really don’t know what I wanted to talk about. I… I just wanted to reach out to you guys,” Lena looked down at her coffee and continued stirring. The hot temperature of the coffee is now only warm.

“Are you…” Nia started but held out a finger out to gesture one minute as she chew and swallowed her food, “Are you sure it’s me you wanted to talk to?”

Lena just shrugged in response and looked out at the window again.

“Kara can’t stop talking about you… like always by the way,” Nia twirled her fork again at the pasta, “She literally won’t shut up about you. She recounts everything you did together. Like when we were at this donut shop that you supposedly like and she got the chocolate glazed one instead of the strawberry since that was what you liked or… she’ll just message me out of nowhere that you’re maybe forgetting to eat your kale salad with chicken for lunch since you work so hard… one time she called in the middle of the night sobbing because she was watching the Little Mermaid and rambled on how you tried to mimic Ariel singing Part of Your World when the two of you watch it…”

Lena’s head turned to Nia so fast she got dizzy for a moment.

“And this one time, we were walking and she saw some Plumerias at a flower shop and she just stopped and stared at it. I barely heard her but she said that she missed you. I caught her once sitting on the roof top of the building near your penthouse, because you know… trackers… and she said she just wanted to hear your heartbeat and couldn’t sleep. She just wanted to hear how strong your heartbeat was… it’s not like she can’t hone and concentrate enough to just isolate your heartbeat out of all the noise in the world because she does that all the time…”

Lena was bright red at this point. She didn’t know that Kara listened to her heartbeat.

When Nia’s brain caught up with her mouth, the junior reporter shut up abruptly and cursed herself for saying those things to Lena.

“I shouldn’t have said that…” Nia twirled her fork so much that it scraped the plate leaving the two people suddenly wincing from the sound. “Just forget everything I said,” the junior reporter chuckled nervously.

The CEO was gripping the spoon and the coffee mug so tight that Nia noticed it.

“Look, Kara defended you all the time. Even if you gave us some suspicions that you shouldn’t be trusted, she came to your defense every single time. Saying that you are not your brother and that we should look past that. That you are this kind, generous, funny and good person all throughout despite what everyone thinks you are. And I know that now, Kara was always right about you and we shouldn’t have judged you like that. I’m sorry,” Nia put down her fork and touched Lena’s hand that was gripping the coffee mug. “I know we don’t talk and I don’t know if you consider me as a friend but the two of you are hurting. And I know that Kara needs you back in her life but she will not force you to do that. It’s always been your choice and whatever it is you choose, she will respect that, just remember that.”

Lena let out a sigh and replied, “I know. I just… whatever it is I choose, there will always be some form of consequence that tags along with it.”

“Well, that’s life isn’t it?” Nia looked softly at Lena, “I know I’m young but from what I had learned is that it’s true that there will always be consequences to whatever path we choose to walk on but… But if you chose something that you know in your heart was the right thing to do, well, you can face the consequences with your head up high.” The junior reporter then smiled at her friend.

“When did you become a therapist?” Lena laughed softly and returned the touch of Nia.

“Well, hanging out with Kelly has its perks I guess,” Nia chuckled.

“You know,” Nia said after a few moments of comfortable silence, “I don’t want to overstep but I think I have to say this…”

Lena hummed and waited for Nia to continue.

“It’s just sometimes you love someone so deeply that it hurts, you know. And the hardest part is sometimes admitting that you are worthy of that love… Life sucks ass but we are worthy to be loved, Lena. I… I just hope you know that.”

“Nia…” was all Lena could say.

“Look… I had gone through some shit in my life and it took a long time for me to accept that I am worthy to be loved by anyone. And… and I kind of see that you’re going through the phase that I went through. The self-doubt and self-hatred and all that negative stuff but rest assured, you are worthy of genuine love,” Nia assured Lena. The junior reporter’s chest ached for the CEO since she knew and felt how difficult it is to go through that phase.

“Thank you,” Lena shyly replied, her eyes brimming with tears. “I really don’t know what to say,” she continued.

“Hey, you’re family, Lena. It’s okay,” Nia smiled.

“Alex said the same thing,” Lena smirked.

“Because it is true!” the junior reporter exclaimed, “ You can be my other mom!”

Lena quirked an eyebrow at that.

“Yeah! Definitely! Like Kara is more like a mother sister thing to me… like more than a mentor but family… and you can be my other mom!” Nia clasped her hands and looked expectantly at Lena.

She suddenly remembered Alex’s words.

Sister in law.

“Wait… sorry… hold on a minute…”

Nia deflated at Lena’s words.

“Alex said technically I am her sister in law?” it came out as a question and frowned at Nia.

The junior reporter smiled and gestured to the waiter and said, “Check please!”

“Nia…” Lena pinched the bridge of her nose.

“Nope,” Nia popped the p at the end, “Not gonna go there.”

The waiter suddenly appeared out of nowhere to give the check and Lena gave her shiny black credit card to the man.

“Sorry to leave you like this but I really have to go,” Nia excused herself and got up from the booth. “This was fun! We should do this again!”

Before Lena can react, Nia leaned down and hugged the CEO and walked away. Before exiting the restaurant though, the junior reporter waved at Lena and shouted, “Bye, mom!”

All Lena could do out of shock is wave back at Nia.

Chapter Text

“Pfffft… #Superguard? Lame…” Lena murmured to herself. She was working down at the labs when her phone dinged with Nia’s message of Andrea’s tweet. This is why she doesn’t have any social media accounts. First of all, she doesn’t have time for any of these things and second, she just doesn’t understand the appeal of showing the whole world everything she does. She feels it takes away the mystery of everything. The junior reporter messaged her not a second later with a “Also, William seems to know what Kara’s coffee is… bleh. What a creeper.” Followed by several vomiting emojis.

The other day, Nia sent a video of a reporter feeling the biceps of a very flustered Supergirl during an interview. Lena almost threw her phone at the door but thankfully, Jess suddenly barged in at the lab with some files. Jess looked at her quizzically since Lena was looking at her guiltily with her phone in hand in midair like she was about to throw it at the door. Lena then slowly lowered down her hand but accidentally hit the play button.

“Wow, Supergirl! You have really toned biceps…” the reporter’s voice rang inside the lab.

Lena lost her grip on the phone and the CEO comically tried to stop the phone falling in midair. The phone landed on the table with a thud, thankfully face up so Lena paused the video. Jess was smirking as she handed the files to her boss and abruptly left the lab.

What does Nia want her to do with all of these information? And why the fuck was Jess smirking? She’s struggling as it is with figuring out whatever it is she needs to figure out, not to mention playing along with whatever plan that Lex’s have. Lena let out an exasperated sighed and sat down on the nearest chair, put down her head on a table. Her hands dangling at the sides.

She feels deep inside that she already knows whatever it is she needs to figure out but her mind doesn’t seem to comprehend it all. It’s like trying to remember a word or a phrase but for some reason it’s just stuck at the tip of your tongue. She knows Alex and Nia had given her clues but she can’t for the life of her understand it. She also knows that she needs to talk to Kara about these things but for now she’s not ready. She also know that Kara will give her the space she needs.

She knows she’s a genius at almost everything, hell, she has one of the highest IQ’s there is but her EQ? She was not trained to be an emotional person. She was trained to be a Luthor. But still, Lena had entertained the thought of that maybe it was time to talk to Kara. Emotions be damned. Truth be told, she had already forgave her friend a long time ago but her pride and her default setting to be a Luthor and to run away when hurt, got the better of her.

Lena huffed and moved her head to the side so she can see the lab, seeing 3 empty large coffee cups at the table, she decided that she needs food in her system. She moved her head again so that her forehead is resting on the table, she groaned after a second and finally stood up.

“Fine!” she shouted at no one, hands flailing in frustration. The CEO then texted Jess that she will be out the remainder of the day and that her secretary can leave early if she wants to. Earning a “Are you sure, Ms. Luthor?” reply from her secretary. She answered that she just needed sometime to herself away from LuthorCorp today (she didn’t know why she replied honestly to Jess). Her secretary then just replied, “Copy, boss.”

---

“Superguard? What the fuck. That’s so fucking lame… like…. Sooooo lame…”

“Why the fuck does William know Kara’s coffee order? Is… he interested in my Kara?”

“Pffft… The nerve of that reporter… feeling up my Kara like that…”

“Lame lame lame lame lame lame…”

“Motherfucking fucker shit my ass…”

Lena’s thoughts raced as she walked. She did not even notice that she was already walking for 20 minutes since leaving LuthorCorp. People were looking at her funny while she mumbled curses under her breath as she passed them by. The only thing that made her stop though was her stomach rumbling. Luckily for her, she stopped right at the entrance of a small restaurant.

Sighing with finality, she entered the restaurant.

“Lena?”

Just her fucking luck. It was Eliza who called out her name.

Eliza then gestured to sit with her. Only then had she noticed that J’onn was sitting there as well.

Lena cursed her luck internally. She steeled herself and walked towards them, hoping her smile doesn’t look like a grimace right now.

J’onn stood up and took a seat beside Eliza.

“Hi Eliza… and J’onn,” Lena nodded and took a seat across the two. Her hands folded unto her lap.

“Do you want to order?” Eliza asked in a hopeful tone. J’onn was only looking at Lena with inquisitive eyes.

“Why do I feel like I’m meeting my girlfriend’s parents for the first time,” Lena thought to herself. She looked at her hands that were starting to fidget on their own.

J’onn smirked and said in an appeasing tone, “You should try their salads here. Eliza said it was good.” He then gestured to the waitress for a menu.

A second later, the waitress gave a menu, “I’ll come back in a minute so you can take a look at the menu.”

Lena took the menu, looked at the name tag of the waitress and said, “Thanks, Grace.” The waitress smiled and took her leave. After a minute of silence and perusing the menu, Lena called the waitress and ordered a Thai steak and pear salad. She then looked at the two across from her. Both Eliza and J’onn didn’t order anything.

Taking pity at Lena, who he sensed was overflowing with nervousness, he cleared his throat and asked, “How are you?”

“I… I’m good. Thanks for asking,” stuttered Lena.

“You’re only having your lunch now, are you?” Eliza asked. Her motherly instinct kicking in.

“Actually… this is my breakfast,” Lena answered shyly.

“But it’s already 3 in the afternoon,” Eliza worriedly answered while J’onn crossed his arms and nodded.

Lena deflated at Eliza’s words. She felt like she was being a disappointment again.

Sensing Lena’s emotion again, J’onn said, “You know what? I’ll order a burger with fries… no... onion rings! Burger and onion rings!” He then called Grace again and ordered his meal.

“Lena, I want to ask you something. Are you okay?” Eliza asked. She put one of her hands on the table, seemingly reaching out to Lena. J’onn leaned in a little bit and clasped both his hands at the top of the table.

Lena seemed to contemplate on what she would say but Eliza beat her to it.

“It’s okay if you’re not. We’re just worried,” Eliza said in a soothing voice.

J’onn followed up with, “You don’t have to be afraid, Lena. We are here for you. I know I haven’t been the kindest nor approachable person before and I know I played a part on what’s ailing you, I’m sorry.”

Lena was silent. She was looking at her hands on her lap like it was the most interesting thing in the world.

“You don’t have to tell us if you don’t want to. We all know that saying sorry will never be enough to justify what we did to you and Kara’s relationship. We all made mistakes and we want to make it right with you, if you let us,” J’onn continued. He then sensed that Lena needed a bit more of an explanation, he said, “I know you feel that the world is against you, again I’m sorry for making you feel that way. Kara had always thought the world of you, defending your honor any chance she gets. And we were blind and jaded with the world but she always fought for you. You have always been a good person, Lena. Don’t ever doubt that.”

A moment of silence fell between the three.

“Kara talks about you a lot. I know her side of the story but it’s not my place to tell,” Eliza said and Lena looked at her in surprise. “When you’re ready, I just hope you’ll let her know your end of the story as well,” the mother smiled.

“When I’m ready,” Lena answered shyly. She then reached out to Eliza and squeezed her hand. She looked at J’onn and smiled at him as well.

“Aaaand here is your Thai steak and pear salad,” Grace said coming out of nowhere and placing the salad in front of Lena, “and your burger with a side of onion rings,” placing the food in front of J’onn. “If you need anything else just holler. Enjoy!” then the waitress perkily walked away.

J’onn then munched on his burger while Eliza took an onion ring. With Lena smiling, proceeded to eat her salad.

“I heard Alex resigned from the DEO,” Lena said after a few forkfuls of her salad.

“Yes. If you want, I could take you to the Tower…” J’onn said after swallowing a bite of his burger.

“Thank you for the offer but not now. Lex might track me,” Lena answered and played with her salad. J’onn nodded understandingly.

“About that… Honey, I just want you to know, you’re not your brother,” Eliza smiled at her again. “Whatever it is you’re going through, whatever it is that is hurting you, I know it will pass and I know you’ll choose to do good.”

Lena stayed quiet.

“And don’t feel like you don’t have any family either. We’re here for you,” Eliza finished.

“Why do you think so highly of me, Eliza? I hurt Kara,” Lena sighed.

“I don’t blame you for what you did, sweetie. Self-preservation is an instinct,” Eliza softly smiled at Lena.

“And it didn’t help that we acted negatively at you,” J’onn said.

“But I still reacted badly… but I want to make amends with Kara,” Lena replied.

“Only when you’re ready, honey,” Eliza repeated her words earlier with a soft smile towards Lena.

“Thank you,” Lena shyly replied.

The three started eating again. After finishing their food, a chuckle came out from Lena which earned a curious look from Eliza and J’onn.

“It’s just… I feel like I’m…” Lena blushed.

“Meeting your girlfriend’s parents for the first time and earning their approval?” J’onn smirked.

Lena blinked owlishly at a smirking J’onn, Eliza was trying to hold her laughter.

“I wouldn’t be opposed to a daughter in law, you know,” teased Eliza. The mother winked at Lena.

“Welcome to the family, Lena,” laughed J’onn.

It took Lena a second to reply, “Why do I feel like I’m not in on the inside jokes?” Lena narrowed her eyes at Eliza and J’onn.

“You’ll get it eventually… in time, sweetie,” Eliza shrugged and J’onn nodded vigorously. “Don’t worry, when you figure it out, we will all be here.”

Eliza and Lena then fell into some scientific conversation after that. With J’onn excusing himself half an hour after because he had to meet Alex over something. Both Eliza and Lena called it a night around 6 in the evening, promising to keep in touch with one another. And with Eliza, hugging then kissing Lena on the forehead and reiterating, “Whatever it is you choose, Lena, you already got a family. We will be here for you no matter what.”

A few tears escaped from Lena’s eyes. Eliza wiped a tear and kissed her forehead again before walking away.

Lena stood dazed by the entrance of the restaurant. After a moment, she realized that somehow her chest wasn’t that heavy than before. She now knows that it wasn’t only Kara that she needed to forgive but herself as well.

Chapter Text

Hi guys! Sorry to say that is not an update. I won't be able to write future chapters for this story anytime soon since the office I work for is helping out the medical staff and frontliners at this time. Our government has suspended all public transports as of now since we are on lockdown. Our office have been helping them with free shuttle service all over the metro and I am one of the deployed staff to document what is happening on the ground.

Covid 19 is a bitch.

Anyway, I'm sorry again. I will try to update soon but I don't know when. I have to help first. I hope you understand.

Thank you, guys. Stay safe always.

Chapter Text

Two days after her run in with Eliza and J’onn at a restaurant, Lena finally decided to call Kelly and asked the doctor if she would want to hang out with her. To her surprise, Kelly said that she was free that afternoon and both agreed to meet up at Lena’s apartment.

“Hi Kelly,” Lena hugged her friend after she opened the door of her penthouse. Kelly hugged back and said hello as well. “Please come in. Make yourself comfortable,” Lena said after they parted and walked towards her kitchen. The doctor nodded and headed towards the sofa and sat.

After a minute, Lena walked towards Kelly holding two glasses of wine.

“So,” Kelly sits straight, “How are you?”

Lena gives a glass of wine to Kelly, “Better, I guess?”

The doctor accepts the drink, “Have you and Kara talked?”

“I mean I’m getting there. I… I just have to put the puzzle pieces together, you know?”

Kelly smirked, “Puzzle pieces?”

Lena sits beside Kelly, “Yeah, it’s like I think that I’m still missing some pieces, mostly pieces of myself…”

“Do you find yourself having boxes in your head?” Kelly asked.

“Where I shove my feelings in? I’ve got a few,” Lena answered and sipped her wine.

“Why don’t you start with those? Maybe some will give some clues,” the doctor suggested.

“But…”

“You’re scared to feel all of it?” Kelly understandingly looked at Lena. The CEO nodded. “Hmmm… what if I help you open just one? Then you decide whether to open the other boxes? But I do have to warn you, there is a large possibility when you open one, you open all of it,” the doctor continued.

“I don’t know,” Lena whispered.

Kelly understood that Lena was feeling scared to feel everything she buried deep inside. The doctor knew that most people with such a high intelligence do have a hard time processing complex emotions, like tackling emotions in a logical way but sometimes emotions are anything but logical. Kelly also knew that her friend is stronger than she thinks and she will try to guide her from those emotions.

“Will it be worth it?” Lena suddenly asked, fear evident in her voice.

Kelly reached out to Lena, “To be honest? It is for you to decide. Will it help with the so called puzzle pieces? I believe so.”

Lena thought hard for a minute, “Alex said something that I’m technically I’m her sister in law.”

“And?” Kelly chuckles.

“And then Nia said that I could be her mom aside from Kara and then Eliza and J’onn told me that I’m family,” Lena pouted and put her wine on the table.

“Does it bother you?” Kelly tried to put on a serious face, she found Lena’s pout as adorable.

“It’s not that I’m bothered because they called me family… it’s more on why they would consider me as one when I hurt Kara,” Lena answered truthfully.

“Have you had an opportunity to ask them that?” the doctor inquired.

“Only Eliza. She said that it was okay since self-preservation was an instinct,” Lena answered.

Kelly nodded, “Well it’s true.”

“I just think that I could have handled it better,” Lena sighed and slumped on the sofa.

“No one is blaming you for that. We all know that you acted like that because of your trust issues. We also know that you’d turn around and make amends when you realize what you did. You just needed time,” Kelly looked at Lena softly.

“Did you know… about Kara?”

“It wasn’t my secret to tell, Lena. I hope you understand that,” Kelly tried to console her friend.

Lena sighed and closed her eyes. Kelly sipped on her wine and waited patiently for her friend. The doctor knew that her friend Is struggling with her feelings, the instinct is telling her friend to pack it all up in boxes and shove them deep into her consciousness.

“I was taught that emotion was a weakness. I didn’t believe it at first then people I considered as family or friend betrayed me over and over again. Then came Jack, I thought I found love and maybe I could trust him but at the end of the day, he didn’t believe in me like I thought he would and that love wasn’t enough… I really thought I loved him deeply… But then I killed Jack to save Kara from the nanites inside him. I didn’t know at that time that Supergirl was Kara but… I still chose her. I grieve Jack’s death but I would do it all again,” Lena sat up straight and looked at her hands, “And then I killed Lex but before he died, he told me that Kara was Supergirl…”

Kelly reached out again and held Lena’s hands.

“It broke me. I felt like Kara didn’t trust me because I was a Luthor. That I cannot be trusted. I packed all of my emotions again that day except for anger. I’m angry that I didn’t even notice that Kara and Supergirl was one and the same. Angry that someone I loved didn’t trust me enough… again. That Kara thinks I am a villain,” Lena was now teary eyed. “And the funny thing is, I know that I would do it again. I would shoot Lex and push the kill button on Jack over and over again.”

Kelly was shocked. She knew bits and pieces of what happened but hearing it from Lena was something else. Though she is happy that Lena was opening up and used the word, love. But she can tell that Lena did not noticed that she said it and so the doctor asked, “Did Kara tell you the reason why she kept it from you?”

“Yes. She told me when she was with me, she was only Kara,” Lena replied.

“Do you understand what that meant?”

“I know I should understand it… like logically but emotionally… I’m having a hard time. It’s like every time I think about it, I want to throw a tantrum or something,” Lena confessed.

“What do you think she meant by I’m only Kara?” prodded Kelly.

“I think that she felt she was herself when she was with me? That she wasn’t burdened with the responsibility of being a superhero pretending to be a human?” Lena’s reply came out as a question.

Kelly nodded and said, “As Supergirl, she carries the whole world in her shoulder every single second of everyday. As Kara Danvers, she carries the fear of disappointing everyone, especially Alex, the fear that if she doesn’t act human enough and people find out that she is Supergirl, people might come after her loved ones. Her fear of losing the family she gained after losing everything before, she carries it every single day. She carries the burden that she saw her own world disappear literally.”

“I…” Lena was trying to comprehend everything.

“To be honest, I would be pissed off too if I was in your position but try to put yourself in her shoes for a moment. When she’s with you, it seems that she forgets about how heavy the load on her shoulders are. Kara is just Kara. She doesn’t have to be anyone but Kara to you because you never expected anything in return from her,” Kelly continued.

“Of course I didn’t expect anything from her… well except for trusting me,” Lena said.

“She did trust you. It’s herself that she didn’t trust. She just wanted to be selfish and keep everything as it was but it ate her up inside.”

“I don’t understand,” a crinkle formed on Lena’s forehead.

“From what I understand is, her fear is that when she tells you, everything will change. Will she be Supergirl or Kara Danvers only with you? Can she ignore the fact that her just being Kara with you will disappear? Will you still expect nothing from her and just be her Kara?” Kelly replied.

Lena was silent for a moment when she finally spoke up, “So basically what I did was her worst nightmare.”

Kelly pursed her lips and nodded.

“But… but she still talked to me… she still acted like my friend,” a confused Lena continued.

“It wasn’t an act. She is still your friend and when it comes to it, she will never fight you, Lena,” Kelly pointed out.

Lena sighed, “Alex told me the same thing. Does Kara… trust me that much to do the right thing?”

Kelly smiled and nodded.

“But why though?”

“She knows you enough and love does that to a person,” the doctor smiled.

Lena’s eyes widen and stutters, “She… she l-loves me?”

“Do you?”

Lena froze. The faint booming of boxes she heard when Alex talked to her became an atomic level of booming in her mind. The CEO blinked rapidly.

“I suppose the answer to that obliterated the boxes in your head?” Kelly chuckled.

“Fuck…” Lena whispered.

“Yup,” Kelly smirked.

Lena stood up and said, “Holy shit…”

“Uhuh,” nodded Kelly.

A few seconds passed when suddenly Lena turned towards Kelly and admitted, “I think I’m in love with Kara…”